The vast majority of prostate cancer survivors experience urinary incontinence following radiation to destroy their tumors or radical prostatectomies – the surgery needed to totally remove a cancerous prostate. That’s why so many of us who’ve gone through these or other treatments are fitted with catheter bags for an average of one to two weeks after the end of our procedure.
Yet anywhere between 7% to 17% of patients sustain urinary incontinence long after prostate cancer surgery and other treatment modalities. At that point, many men are compelled to wear an adult diaper, which is both uncomfortable and embarrassing.
Now a new alternative is available, according to Bob Deerin, founder of a product line called Wearever. As he elaborates in his guest column below, his company manufactures men's underwear that thoroughly and adroitly controls leakage and offers absorbent protection. While I have not received any remuneration for bringing this product to your attention, I thought it would be worth “airing it” with you!
Managing Post-Prostate Cancer Incontinence with Confidence
by Bob Deerin
Temporary and long-term urinary incontinence is something most guys are uncomfortable talking about. But, this hush-hush issue is more common than you may think. According to the Journal of Urology, 8.2 million men in the United States – including many prostate cancer survivors, have to deal with incontinence.
WebMD indicates that removing the prostate through surgery or destroying it through radiation disrupts the way the bladder holds urine and can result in urine leakage. There are ways to help prevent leakage such as Kegel exercises, avoiding excessive amounts of fluids, medications and surgeries. But there are also easy daily solutions that can help you maintain your lifestyle particularly after going ahead with treatment. This includes real underwear, rather than a diaper, specially designed to absorb and contain light, moderate or heavy incontinence with greater comfort and far less embarrassment.
These Wearever briefs look and feel just like traditional underwear but offer the absorbent protection needed for those living with incontinence. It succeeds where other products fail because of an innovative sewn-in pad with a three-layer design: the top layer lets liquid in; the middle layer moves liquid out to the edges of the fabric, wicking it away so it doesn’t pool and, therefore, resists bacteria growth and odor; and the urethane bottom layer prevents leaking through, so that the moisture is contained within the undergarment.
According to many prostate cancer survivors, this adult brief makes it possible to all but forget your incontinence. Men who wear it while working out in the gym are more comfortable because no one can tell you’re wearing this specialized underwear. In addition, despite their ongoing “flow” while sitting down on chairs or benches for a few minutes, when they stand up again, their seats are still dry.
With the look and feel of traditional underwear, the briefs eliminate the discomfort and loss of dignity that can come with pads or adult diapers. The new product is also easy-care machine washable and lasts as long as a traditional pair of underwear. This means that unlike disposable products, repeated purchases aren’t necessary.
All this makes for one less source of stress while going through prostate cancer recovery and getting back to your pre-treatment lifestyle. To learn more, visit www.WeareverUS.com.
I'm thrilled to share that my ebook, Reigniting Intimacy and Sexuality After You’re Ill, has been named a finalist in the Relationships/Sexuality category of the prestigious Global Ebook Awards.
In this ebook you'll find specific strategies for renewing your sex life after prostate cancer and other major illnesses. It's available in PDF, Kindle and epub formats for just $4.99.
In my role as an intimacy coach, I'm thrilled to be participating in a panel discussion for cancer survivors titled "Living and Loving After Cancer: How to Overcome Treatment Side-Effects of Pain, Stress, Fear, Fatigue and Reduced Intimacy."
I'll be sharing the stage with urologist Dr. Alan Treiman and gynecologist Dr. Kristen Shepherd. The discussion will be moderated by Andrea Feldmar from The Center for Building Hope,
If you live in Florida, I hope that you can join me for this enlightening session on Wednesday, June 20, 2012, from 2:00 to 3:30 p.m. at the Sarasota Memorial Hospital Auditorium.
Experiencing major illness does not need to mean the end of sex or intimacy. I invite you to join me on Wednesday, May 9, 2012, for my presentation, Reigniting Intimacy After Major Illness.
In this program, hosted by the Relationship Coaching Institute, I will share:
1.“Making Love” versus “Having Sex”
2. The S-T-I-C-K Method for Whole-Body Sex
3. Rabbi Ed's "Open Communication" strategy
Please pass the word about this important program to your interested friends and family members.
Date: Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Time: 5:00 pm Pacific/ 8:00 pm Eastern
There's no need to pre-register - just click here to attend this free webinar presentation via computer or telephone. You can ask questions during the presentation and access a replay afterward.
To get maximum benefit from this program please complete a quick pre-webinar survey. On this survey you can also register to win a complimentary copy of my home study course, 10 Strategies for Reigniting Intimacy After a Major Illness, a $49.99 value.
I look forward to having you on the webinar!
If your love life has been disrupted by cancer or another serious illness or its treatment side-effects, please take this quick 5 question survey to let me know how I can be of help to you:
This survey takes just a couple of minutes and it will give you an opportunity to briefly reflect on your primary relationships, while helping me determine how I can be of service to you and others.
To be entered in a drawing to win a free copy of my intimacy home study course, Ten Strategies for Reigniting Sexuality and Intimacy After a Major Illness, just enter your email address on the last line of the survey.
Thank you!
I'm honored to be one of about 20 relationship and sexuality coaches you can hear by phone or online from February 6-23, 2012. The teleseminar series is called Blissful Living and Loving: A Virtual Conference on Love, Sex and Relationships.
My session takes place on Tuesday, February 21, 2012, at Noon Eastern time, when I will present "5 Ways to Reignite Sex and Intimacy after Cancer and Other Illnesses."
I invite you to click here to sign up to attend my session and some or all of the other presentations led by relationship experts on a variety of themes of interest to cancer survivors and the general population. Each presenter has a lot to offer. Apart from my subject, other topics include "Setting Your Life for Love," "Practicing Deliberate Sexuality," "Beyond Orgasms," and "Building Healthy Relationships." I hope you can join us.
As it happens, I've been invited to offer a similar presentation, "Reigniting Intimacy and Sexuality after Cancer," at the Evidence-based Complementary and Alternative Cancer Therapies Conference in West Palm Beach, Florida, on March 2. If you'd like to register for that event and hear me and others address some timely topics, please contact me by email using the link beneath my photo in the column on the right.
Does anyone like wearing a Foley catheter bag due to prostate or bladder problems? If you’re like most men the answer is a decisive “No!”
Now there’s now a new option. It’s called a”Spanner.” Not only can you avoid voiding through a catheter + bag. You can enjoy greater sexual intimacy before resolving what treatment you need.
The newly FDA-aproved Spanner has significant religious implications for observant Moslems, as described in the article below. But everyone can benefit from the Spanner’s capacity to diagnose whether it’s your bladder or prostate that’s causing you problems.
For more details see the attached post I received a couple of months ago from a public relations specialist and fellow author, and take a look at the website I’ve mentioned.
Spanner Could Transform Practice of Urology
Parkers Prairie, Minnesota, October 24, 2011 – It’s called the Spanner, and it could revolutionize the treatment given to men suffering from prostate, bladder problems, or both. The only temporary prostatic stent approved by the FDA, this new product is already improving quality of life and treatment outcomes for many.
The features of this device are also bringing an extra level of comfort to Muslim men experiencing prostate problems. Until recently, a patient with these conditions was fitted with a Foley catheter, which directs urine into a bag attached to the patient’s thigh. Not only has the catheter been found to be less than satisfactory in a number of ways, for men who practice Islam, the catheter and its external attachment are considered unclean, keeping them from entering a mosque to say their daily prayers, which are obligatory.
Dr. Danny Rabah, director of urology at King Saud University Medical School in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, sees this problem in many of his patients. Rabah, trained at Memorial Sloan-Kettering in New York, recently conducted a preliminary study where patients had the Spanner placed and removed in his office. Results indicated it was not only safe and effective, the device was the preferred treatment for patients in the study, who reported their lives significantly improved as a result: With catheter and leg bag gone, the stent helped restore normalcy to their daily activities, including resumption of a normal level of sexual intimacy.
Rabah, who is already instructing his medical residents in application of the Spanner, will soon conduct a larger, 18-month analysis, suggesting that this more extensive research could have a major and positive worldwide impact. “It will be a three-part study, ranging from quality of life improvement issues to those who will benefit from surgery and those who will not,” Rabah said.
In the United States, Dr. Mitchell Humphreys, an urologist with the Mayo Clinic in Scottsdale, Arizona, has also found the Spanner works well and is preferred by patients who previously had been tethered to a catheter and leg bag. He also sees its potential of becoming an effective diagnostic tool.
Humphreys says the device can be valuable in helping physicians decide whether it’s the patient’s bladder or prostate causing the problem, because in 20% of cases, it’s the former. He added that “The Spanner offers the perfect option to patients considering surgery, demonstrating how much better patients can void by being de-obstructed before deciding whether or not to have surgery, without the possibility of disease risk from the surgery.”
Manufactured by AbbeyMoor Medical, Incorporated, the Spanner has also been approved for reimbursement by Medicare.
To help patients, survivors and their partners resolve their most intimate concerns, I have created the Intimacy Development System (IDS), offering ten strategies to reverse survivors’ tendency to distance themselves from their spouses or partners due to anxiety about disfigurement or sexual dysfunction.
The most crucial strategy is to “make love,” and not just “have sex.” Intimacy can develop if partners emphasize “whole-body sex” rather than intercourse alone. I recommend the “S-T-I-C-K” method of sensate-focus, where partners express mutual appreciation and rekindle romance through psychological stroking (S), touching (T) from head to toe, intercourse (I) only if mutually desired, cuddling (C) and kissing (K). Initiating humor and playfulness and “keeping the faith” are equally important.
Learn about these and other helpful techniques in my free report, Renewing Intimacy after Illness, and my new ebook, Reigniting Intimacy and Sexuality after You're Ill. You'll find even more tips in my home-study intimacy course and in my Amazon bestseller, Conquer Prostate Cancer: How Medicine, Faith, Love and Sex Can Renew Your Life. While you're there, check out my individual and group coaching programs, including a half hour discovery consultation at no charge.
Each autumn, slogans like “Choose blue!” or “Think pink!” abound, along with blue or pink newspaper and magazine sections, advertisements and supermarket products. These announce the annual advent of National Prostate and Breast Cancer Awareness Months every September and October. However, an important issue is often overlooked at this season.
I appreciate the positive emphasis on the need for medical research and community support. But as a prostate cancer survivor, healthcare educator, and certified sexuality counselor with a doctorate in gerontology, I'm concerned that hardly anyone stresses ways to address cancer survivors’ need for greater intimacy, even though most suffer from some form of long-term sexual dysfunction.
In fact, one-third of the 400,000 Americans diagnosed each year with prostate or breast cancers are Boomers, ages 45 to 65, whose vibrant personal lives are suddenly disrupted.
When it comes to major illnesses like breast and prostate cancer, quality of life issues like improving patients’ sexual relationships are generally overlooked, even when specialists address the medical mechanics of sexual rehabilitation.
Reigniting great sex after cancer is a painful challenge for many cancer patients, survivors or their partners. Take positive steps to enhance your intimate relationship by checking out the resources on my new website, Loving After Cancer. You'll be glad you did!
Cancer patients often do not want to talk about their illness. Rabbi Dr. Ed Weinsberg, prostate cancer survivor, and Kathleen O’Keefe, a two-time cancer survivor, not only talk about it, but believe the patient must be educated and utilize his or her intuition.
Listen to their stories on the Dr. Melanie Show on the VoiceAmerica Health & Wellness Channel. The Dr. Melanie Show is designed to educate the world about holistic techniques and the benefit of using them combined with Western methods, as well as to give you hope that your situation can be better.