Couchtime

The Bachelor: It's A Suite, Suite Fantasy, Baby

2012-02-28T10:29:00.003-04:00

Oh, the fantasy suites. There's nothing like 'em to remind you of just how gross The Bachelor is. Sleep with three women (or men), make each one of them believe they're special even though they know you'll be doing THIS EXACT THING with two other women, and then kick one of them to the curb. What a fairytale! Even if you end up "winning" this whole thing, you have to live with the idea that your new fiancee was in bed with another woman about...a week? before he proposed to you!

It was no surprise that all three women eagerly agreed to accompany Ben to the fantasy suite. The only hold-out might have been Kacie, who Ben wisely let go last week. So with that, let's talk about Ben's Swiss adventures!

Taking the relationship to new heights

The first date in Switzerland went to Nicki, the dark horse in this competition. If you'd asked me a few weeks ago, I never would have guessed Nicki would be in the final three. I guess she has Kacie's super conservative parents to thank for that. Nicki and Ben went on a helicopter ride - if you can call it that. It was more like a helicopter tour of terror, since the thing plummeted towards the ground faster than Courtney's bikini bottoms in Puerto Rico.

The helicopter dropped Ben and Nicki off on a mountaintop, parking just a little too close to the edge of the mountain for my taste. They had a picnic and weakly shouted things into the mountains. Nicki later said she wanted to scream she loves Ben from the mountaintop. I can only assume she didn't because it would be super awkward when Ben didn't reciprocate.

Ben told Nicki her dad reminded him of his late father, and the poor girl really took that to heart. It was almost painful to watch her tell him over dinner how much that comment meant to her. It was like you could see Ben thinking "Oh crap, I really didn't mean much by that. I just meant both our dads have similar noses."

Nothing about Ben's date with Nicki suggested that he was as into her as he is Lindzi or Courtney, but it seems like he considers her a practical choice. And as you all know, practicality has absolutely no place on The Bachelor.

Taking the relationship to new depths

Next up was Lindzi, who accompanied Ben on a romantic date of...rappelling down a mountain? Geez, what is this, The Amazing Race? It's like in anticipation of the fantasy suites Ben is attempting to scare the pants off every girl.

Blah blah blah, there were a lot of terrifying thing/new relationship metaphors, blah blah blah. Lindzi is likely the best choice for Ben, but I find them so dull to watch on TV that I can barely bring myself to write about it. I'm so sick of hearing about how Lindzi's heart was broken! She's not even the token divorcee this season and she's given Tenley quite the run for her money.

Even though she is absolutely the last person I would ever describe as an "ice queen", these are the words Lindzi chooses to describe her transformation and newfound vulnerability to Ben. (You want to know about being an ice queen, girlfriend? Talk to me about the time I was the only person with dry eyes at a showing of My Sister's Keeper.)

Ben and Lindzi went to the fantasy suite (like there was any question about that) and Ben later said he loves Lindzi - something he never said about Nicki.

Taking the relationship to new places

Courtney received the final date, also the only one that didn't involve doing something scary. Hmm, was this because the meanie model already dropped her pants for the bachelor? Ben and Courtney got to explore an adorable Swiss village, and Courtney greeted every stranger with an enthusiastic "Hi!" in what I can only assume was an attempt to prove how friendly she can be.

It was clear that Ben knows something is off with his relationship with Courtney, but he just doesn't want to admit it. While they picnicked outside, Ben began to discuss his questions about Courtney and her behavior towards the other women. "I watched you and I noticed that at certain times you would kind of twist the knife a little bit, and I wished in those moments that you would have made it a little easier on me." Um, seriously? You noticed what a bitch she is, yet still brought her along to the final three? When Courtney offered a wishy-washy answer, Ben bailed. "I don't really want to get into it. We're having a nice day." Yeah, that's a great strategy for choosing a spouse!

At dinner that night, after she'd had a chance to practice her lines and rub some onions under her eyes, Courtney offered Ben a tearful apology. Even though Ben basically said he's worried the many women in his life will hate him for bringing Courtney home, he accepted Courtney's weak apology and told her he's falling in love with her.

It is painfully obvious at this point that Ben will choose Courtney, because why else would she be getting this edit? Oh, she feels so bad about how she treated the other girls. Oh, it was only because this whole experience was so hard on her. Oh, Ben was so happy she "apologized". Puh-lease. Call me when she apologizes to the women she was so snide to, and call the waaaahmbulence before she sells Ben another pathetic sob story.

At the end of the night, Courtney accepted Ben's invitation to go to the fantasy suite - but we all know that ship sailed back in Puetro Rico.

Interruption: Meet Emily, your new Bachelorette

Break time! Let's take a moment to forget this drab season of The Bachelor ever happened so we can try to get excited about Emily Maynard as The Bachelorette! Remember Emily? She's the sweet, beautiful, blond Southern belle who was recently engaged to Brad. She has the saddest back story in the history of The Bachelor, a young daughter named Ricki, and she plans birthday parties for sick kids for a living. Seriously, you can't make this stuff up.

Emily was nervous about doing The Bachelorette, so she flew to L.A. to get advice from the two least appropriate people possible - Ali and Ashley! Please. One of these girls has already broken up with her choice, and for the other it's only a matter of time. Stop trying to pretend like this show is successful, producers! You can't drag Trista Sutter out every single season!

The three gals went to see Titanic 3D in dresses that were meant for women starring in rap videos, and Ashley made us all throw up when she said Jack and Rose are the epitome of a perfect relationship. Um, seriously? They hung out on a boat for a week or so and then one of them died. So, I guess their relationship did have a similar lifespan to those on The Bachelor.

Final Warning

It wouldn't be The Bachelor(ette) if someone didn't dramatically return to the show, so before the rose ceremony we were treated to a surprise visit from Kacie. First she wanted some answers from Ben, and he gave her a sugarcoated version of the harsh truth - he dumped her because her family was too conservative.

But Kacie didn't end there. Even if she didn't have a chance with Ben, she wanted to make sure Courtney didn't either. So she warned him that Courtney would break his heart and backed it up with mentions of how Courtney talked about "winning" a lot and once said there were other fish in the sea besides Ben. I was hoping Kacie would deliver a more convincing argument, but when she left it was obvious Ben was feeling conflicted. Kacie laid on the floor of the hotel hallway for awhile, and then departed. Is she more upset that she lost Ben, or that the casting of Emily means she won't get to be the next bachelorette?

At this point, Ben has been warned many times about Courtney. Emily got things rolling very early on and he brushed her off. Then the women on the group date confronted him. Now Kacie flew all the way to Switzerland ~~for a free trip and to play with cute baby lambs~~ to throw another red flag in his face. And he's witnessed some of the cattiness for himself. What will it take? If Ben wasn't going to eliminate Courtney after this, then it seems inevitable that he'll propose to her. And he'll deserve whatever he gets.

After a heart to heart with Harrison, Ben handed out the roses - first Lindzi and then, yes, Courtney.

Poor Nicki. She put it all on the table and Ben just never reciprocated. I have to say, she handled the heartbreak like a champ. "I hope he's making the right decision," she said. Unfortunately, it seems pretty clear that he won't.

Next week is The Women Tell All, which is always a laugh and a half. I can't wait to see what Emily has to say about Courtney.

How I Met Your Mother: That's Karma, Baby

2012-02-28T09:40:00.003-04:00

How I Met Your Mother has been hot and cold in recent seasons, delivering both fantastic storylines (Hi, Jason Segel...real glad you're on this show) and toying with our hearts and minds, particularly when it comes to Ted and his relationships. (Hi, Zoey, wish you'd never been on this show.) But these last couple of episodes have my hopes high.

In last night's episode, Ted ended up giving his apartment to Lily and Marshall. You'll remember that, when the show began, the three of them lived there. Ted discovered via Robin that Lily and Marshall hated it in Long Island, and since he'd never taken their names off the lease he decided to give them the apartment.

I liked how this all tied together. I was getting tired of the Long Island jokes with lily and Marshall, and Ted not knowing how to fill Robin's old room was a nice touch in his getting over Robin. Where is he going now? Will he finally move back into that house he bought - the one the show only remembers he owns about every 14 episodes? Or will he do something else?

I'm less sold on this Barney/Karma thing. Seeing a stripper take advantage of Barney just didn't hit the right chord for me. I get what the show is doing - Barney has finally met his match, and that's what makes him so attracted to Quinn/Karma. But are we really supposed to believe Barney is going to settle down with a stripper?

Barney eventually realized he was being played and left Karma and the strip club behind. But what goes around comes around! The next morning, there she was, ahead of him in line for coffee. And they actually kind of had a date. Even though I wasn't sold on the storyline, I did like the moment where Quinn told Barney she didn't believe any of what he'd told her about himself (it was all true), thus revealing that she'd actually been listening.

I still don't know if the stripper is the one for Barney, or just something (someone?) for his character to do while the pieces are put in place for a happy ending with Robin. But at least this time the writers have avoided The Zoey Problem - Quinn is actually likable. I won't mind seeing her interact with the gang more, the way Kevin did.

I hope these changes will create some momentum for HIMYM and breathe new life into the series before the season finale. This show is still good, but I think most fans will agree that it's not as good as it once was. I used to really look forward to watching it, and now it's just another half hour block on my TV schedule. The idea that characters' lives are about to change drastically - Ted moving, Lily and Marshall having a baby, Barney dating a stripper, Robin...well, we don't know, but my money's on career advancement - creates a sense of excitement that I haven't had in a while about this show. I just hope they follow through.

What did you guys think of the show? Are you excited about these new developments or are you bummed Ted won't be living above MacLaren's Pub anymore?

Favorite quotes & moments:

Like I said, I didn't love the Long Island stuff - but there was one major exception. Robin's diary entries? Pure gold.
Ted: "In a city of 8 million people, you happen to walk into the club where she works? Maybe it’s destiny."
Barney: "Nah, Destiny strips at the Melon Patch. They’re people, Ted. Try to keep 'em straight."
"First off, we have a lot in common. For example, both of our jobs are largely financed by drunk Asian businessmen." - Barney
Ted was pretty funny this week, with his meat smoking and his wood working. I kept waiting for someone to lean on that crib and break it, but the fact that a tiny piece of paper caused it to collapse was awesome.

Sweet Home Alabama: See you later, alligator

2012-02-27T13:37:00.002-04:00

We were treated to another two hour long episode of Sweet Home Alabama on Friday night, and the episode picked up right where we left off: Paige had sent home Dustin and Donny. They both seemed like really great guys, and I think as a testament to that all of the remaining guys only had good things to say about them. I know the next star of SHA will probably be Bubba (assuming Paige chooses Jeremiah, which is only a guess) but I think Donny would also be a really good choice.

Swamp Thing

As you'll remember from last week's episode, Big Shaun was getting a date with Paige this week. But instead of a fancy, flashy date like they had in Miami Paige wanted to know if Shaun could hang with her on her terms. So they went alligator hunting.

Shaun came across like a total jerk for the first several episodes of this show, and he probably is a bit of a jerk, but he's also really funny. Now that he's not ragging on "hillbillies" all the time, I can actually appreciate his sense of humor. And hey, I'm a pretty sarcastic girl, so I'm sure if I were on a reality TV show there's a chance I'd get the villain edit as well.

The alligator hunting date was not something I'd choose to do, and it was obviously outside of Shaun's comfort zone as well. But he made the best of it and laughed a lot, and it seemed like they had a really good time. I never would have guessed that Shaun would go so far in this, but of all the city guys left I liked him the most.

Shaun went back to the house after his date still decked out in the camo gear they gave him, and all of the guys seemed to get a good laugh out of how much Shaun has changed since they first got to Alabama. All the guys except Landon, of course. At this point, Landon is my least favorite guy left on the show. It's like he has 'roid rage all the time. He's too jealous, too cocky, and so obsessed with Paige that it's almost creepy. The way he put on his own camo gear just because Shaun was wearing it? That was almost as ridiculous as the chat he tried to have with him. I'm ready to see Landon go home.

Row Boat

Next Little Shaun got a date - and thank goodness, because I think everyone was tired of hearing him whine about not having a second date yet. He and Paige went back to the farm where they had their first date and spent some time on a row boat.

I just don't see the connection with these two. Little Shaun seems great, but he comes across as SO YOUNG. He told Paige he isn't ready to get married and settle down yet, and she said she's OK with that - but later, when Shaun said that to Jeremiah, that worried Jeremiah because he thought Paige was more in line with him, wanting to settle down right away. I can understand how Paige would say two different things - maybe she's open to settling down soon, but also doesn't feel the need to rush if the guy she likes isn't ready. But poor Jeremiah now has another thing to worry about. Can someone get that guy a Xanax?

Paige also told Little Shaun that he and the rest of the guys in the house should lay off Landon. I wish Paige could understand more of why the guys dislike Landon. I hate the phrase "bros before hoes" more than anything, and if I were Paige I also would have sent Jeremy home. But she was about to send Landon home that night too, and I don't think their chemistry together is any stronger just because he was the one who told her about Jeremy. He's still way too intense, he's too jealous of the other guys, and I think those are major red flags. Doesn't he strike you as the kind of guy who wouldn't want his girlfriend to go out to a bar with her friends, just in case some other guy might try to talk to her?

Martini Night

I think Todd was practically friend zoned before his date with Paige even began. They went out for cocktails together - a nice, normal date. Again, this is why I like Sweet Home Alabama. No helicopters or round-the-world trips, just normal dates that you or I might go on.

Paige was feeling really stressed out about everything that's going on, and she needed to talk to someone. So Todd was that sounding board. Which is great, except it kind of suggests that Todd is more of a pal than a date. Up until then, Paige had worried that Todd was a typical smooth-talking car salesman, but on their date she realized he's more than that.

Todd's someone I've gone back and forth on all season. He's hilarious, but sometimes he's come across as a jerk as well. He doesn't seem right for Paige, but based on his Twitter (and frankly, that's the only way I judge people these days) I've decided he's incredibly funny.

Now is when I should probably talk about how all the guys gave Little Shaun a picture of his horse. The one that died, named Credit Card. It was sweet, but I wish the horse had a better name than Credit Card. We should just call it C.C. from now on. Agreed?

Eliminations

Before the eliminations, Paige showed up to officially tell the guys to lay off Landon, and then she invited him out on a date. Sigh. Is it awful that I hope their date goes badly? I really don't care for Landon, and I think Paige would have sent him home a while ago if she didn't see him as a protector.

I had a feeling Todd would be eliminated since their date gave off a distinct friend vibe, but I wasn't sure who the other guy would be. I thought it could be Joey, but I wasn't sure Paige would cut two city guys. I thought there was a chance it could be Little Shaun instead. But it was Joey, a guy Paige was really attracted to but didn't have much in common with. You've got to hand it to Paige for being so honest with the guys - she told Joey that they didn't have much in common and their conversations had awkward silences.

Wow, would you have ever guessed that Big Shaun would be the last guys standing? That's certainly a surprise, but of all the guys left I'd say he has one of the stronger relationships with Paige. Paige is left with five guys now: Big Shaun from the city, and Bubba, Jeremiah, Little Shaun and Landon from the country. I still think she'll end up with Jeremiah, but I think Bubba and Big Shaun will be in the final three with him.

Stray thoughts on the episode:

With the two hours episodes, we get to see a lot more of the guys' hilarious shenanigans inside the house. My favorite was Big Shaun pretending to hide in his camo gear, but Little Shaun's impression of Big Shaun was a close second.
At elimination, Jeremiah whispered "I miss you" to Paige and she whispered "I miss you too" back to him - a cute moment if you're rooting for Paige to pick Jeremiah!
My favorite moment from the whole episode? Seeing Bubba without a hat on. All along I've been wondering if he's bald, and now we know he isn't!

Now I know you guys are going to have a lot to say, so head to the comments and tell me what you think!

The Amazing Race: Moo-vin' Right Along

2012-02-27T12:51:00.003-04:00

I watched The Amazing Race this morning since I was at an Oscars party last night, but if you watched TAR in real time and missed Hollywood's salute to the movies, I can tell you what you missed right here. It was a rather predictable evening, unlike this episode of The Amazing Race that saw a lot of twists and turns.

Pony Express

Dave and Rachel began this second leg in first place, but they didn't hold that advantage for long - their next clue was arriving via chasqui (courier) and they had to wait until daybreak, and by that point all the teams had arrived. In fact, when the poor guy rode in on his horse with the clues so many teams charged him that I was worried they'd spook the horse.

The clue instructed teams to choose a Detour - either "Boil My Water" or "Light My Fire". Only one team, the border patrol agents, chose "Light My Fire". They had to load a bunch of wood and clay onto a donkey and then transport it to a village to start a fire. It seemed like a bigger risk, given that working with animals on The Amazing Race can often be unpredictable.

Everyone else went for "Boil My Water", which required them to assemble a solar panel and use it to boil a kettle of water. That sounded easy enough, especially since most of the teams had no problem putting together the solar panel. Most of the teams - the clowns missed the rather obvious instructional illustration on the box (and there wasn't an Ikea phone number listed anywhere either) and had to be tipped off by Dave and Rachel; Team Meathead had to ask the cousins for advice; worst of all, Rachel spent most of her time with Brendon squawking "I'm sorry I'm not good at this. I'm sorry I'm just a girl." Just a girl? This is why I hate Rachel. Ohhh, I've had it up to HERE.

The biggest obstacle in this challenge, however, was the amount of time it took for the water to boil. I think this was an issue only Team Border Patrol foresaw, and they managed to leave the Detour in second place while everyone else stood around making awkward "a watched pot never boils" jokes. Only Bopper and Mark finished ahead of them. There's a team I may have underestimated following the first episode. They might scream "hillbilly", but they did pretty darn good this leg.

Bus Ride Blues

From the Detour, teams had to catch a bus for an 18 hour ride to Buenos Aires - a task that seemed easy enough, albeit it probably rather uncomfortable. (Note to self: If I ever get to be on The Amazing Race, pack a lot of Gravol.)

The teams were on three different buses, and it looked like Team "Teacher" (the federal agents) and the cousins would be battling it out for last place since they were the only two teams on the third bus. But a freak accident involving a blown out window (thankfully, no one was hurt) delayed the second bus and shook everything up. Suddenly the hot brothers, Vanessa and Ralph, the clowns and the meatheads were at the back of the pack.

Divide and Conquer

Once in Buenos Aires, teams were faced with a Roadblock: "Where's the beef?" Unfortunately, the clue didn't tip off the teams that the task would involve math - math with no calculator! I'm not going to lie to you - there's a reason I was a journalism major and am a blogger. My math skills are dismal. I can throw down a seven letter word in Scrabble any day, just don't ask me to calculate my score. I'm not sure I would have been able to complete this Roadblock.

The challenge required the teams to head to a cattle market, where one person would divide the total weight of a corral of cows (shouted out by the auctioneer) by the number of cows in the corral to get the average weight. This meant dividing a number around, say, 2,477 by a number of, say, 22. I can't do that. However, what I also wouldn't have done was act like Rachel, crying and moaning about how I "don't know anything about cows." Um, sweetie? Cow knowledge wasn't really what was required here.

A lot of the teams began to work together to get the answer, starting with Rachel of Dave and Rachel and J.J. of Team Border Patrol. They got the answer and headed off to the pit stop, where Dave and Rachel nabbed first place for the second time in a row and Border Patrol placed second.

Mark gave Annoying Rachel a hand in the Roadblock, so they landed third and fourth place. Not before Brendon and Rachel had a big fight though - I never watched Big Brother, but I read enough of Allison's reviews for the blog to know that Rachel is really annoying. Now I know why. She threw a tantrum like a toddler! Her whining included "You know I'm not as smart as you," and then she ended the fight by helpfully noting to Brendon "You have a booger." Classy chick, right?

Next came the two teams from the third bus, who totally thought they were bringing up the rear. The Cousins managed to breeze through the Roadblock thanks to helping an 11 year-old kid with math homework and grabbed fifth place, followed by Team Fake Teachers in sixth.

That just left the crew from the second bus. I like Vanessa and Ralph so far, so I was happy to see Vanessa get the right math answer on her first try - they made it to the pit stop in seventh place. Unfortunately my least favorite team, the meatheads, were next. They worked with the hot twins though, and I was definitely not ready to see those guys go home.

That meant the clowns were in last place, since no one wanted to help poor Dave come up with the right answer. I was sort of expecting this to be a non-elimination leg, but when they arrived on the mat Phil told them they were out of the race. It's probably for the best, since they were already starting to grate my nerves.

I like how this season is shaping up so far. Dave and Rachel are definitely contenders, but there are some dark horses. Mark and Bopper surprised me this week, and I think as we see more of Vanessa and Ralph, the hot twins, and the cousins we could have a good competition heating up. As for Team Fake Teacher, I think their days could be numbers. What did you guys think of the episode?

The Oscars: To the movies!

2012-02-27T10:34:00.004-04:00

Last night I went to a local party hosted by fellow Halifax bloggers Fashionable People, Questionable Things to watch the Oscars. Normally we'd all be snarking about the fashions (check out my best and worst dressed lists) and the shows from the comforts of our homes, via Twitter and live blog, but instead we sat side by side, eating cupcakes and drinking boxed wine, still communicating via Twitter and live blog.

I was one of the few there who was actually happy Billy Crystal was hosting the Oscars. I just enjoy him, his video montages, and his cheesy songs. And even though there were definitely some awkward moments in last night's telecast (don't make fun of Christopher Plummer being old, OK, because he's Captain Von Trapp and he will kick your ass, Billy Crystal!) overall I thought he did a decent job. Unfortunately, the show itself was still kind of a snooze.

Had I been playing "Drink every time we celebrate the movie industry", I would not have made it home last night. Look, I know the Oscars are a tribute to the movies. I know that it is a night where people who make movies get together and celebrate one another. I know this. But could their celebrations be, you know, a little more focused? Every single thing they did was just an homage To The Movies! It became tiresome.

Of course, this is fitting since the two frontrunners for Best Picture - The Artist and Hugo - were both about how great movies are, and the golden age of cinema, and how wonderful the film industry is. And I liked both movies, it can just become a bit much, you know?

Now, as for the awards, most of them came out as expected but there were some surprises. Here's a full list of the nominees and winners. For my own predictions (which I put together on the fly on Saturday evening thanks to having seen seven of the nine movies nominated for Best Picture and some quick Internet research) I got 17 of 24 categories correct. Of the main categories (Best picture, acting, directing, writing) I only got one wrong - I predicted a win for Viola Davis, but it went to Meryl Streep instead. That was one of the few categories all night that could have gone more than one way. All in all, The Artist won big.

I'm happy with that result, because I really liked The Artist. This year, there weren't a lot of nominated movies I loved. I really liked George Clooney in The Ides of March, but I wasn't a huge fan of The Descendants. I thought Moneyball was OK, but nothing special. I thought The Help was a very well acted Lifetime TV Movie. I HATED War Horse. I can't tell you how much I hated it. And as for The Tree of Life and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close well, the odds are that I'll never see them.

What did you guys think of the telecast? The winners?

More stray thoughts on the Oscars:

I liked most of the classic "Put Billy Crystal into all the nominated movies" montage, but did anyone else think it kind of got lazy near the end? He just floated around on a film reel, looking at all the other films.
Robert Downey Jr., for the first time ever, did not win me over with his presenting gag.
Emma Stone mocking Anne Hathaway's over-enthusiasm last year was absolutely hilarious.
Had the orchestra tried to play off Christopher Plummer, who gave a beautiful speech (I can't believe that was his first Oscar!) I would have boycotted the show for the rest of my life.
Why was Angelina Jolie posing like the lovechild of Lea Michele and Posh Spice?
Dean Pelton won an Oscar! Seeing Jim Rash win for Best Adapted Screenplay (The Descendants) was a kick for anyone who watched Community. I also LOVED that he mocked Angelina and her leg.
There wasn't time for The Muppets to sing, but there was time for a lame Cirque du Soleil performance? I call foul, Oscars!
Billy Crystal's joke about Christan Bale was funnier than anything Ricky Gervais said at the Golden Globes.

The Oscars: Fashion Favorites

2012-02-27T09:47:00.001-04:00

If you missed it before, make sure you check out my choices for the worst dresses from last night's Oscars red carpet. I wasn't that impressed with what I saw on the red carpet last night, so it was hard to scrape together my favorite ten dresses of the evening.

10. Judy Greer: I love that Judy Greer, who has played every snarky BFF in every romcom in history, got to go to the Oscars. She was good in The Descendants and she wasn't even being sarcastic in it. And even though the neckline bothers me a little, I think this dress was a win.

9. Sarah Hyland: I don't know why Haley from Modern Family was at the Oscars, other than she dresses really well on the red carpet and she was funny making fun of how Lea Michele poses that one time on Fashion Police. But whatever - good for her! On TV I thought this dress was grey and I wad mad at her, but once I realized it's lilac (or mauve, or violet, or, you know, purple) I quite liked it.

8. Stacy Keibler: Last night I was sure I didn't like this dress, but when I saw it again in a photo I reconsidered my stance. I still don't love the swooshing fabric around her hip, but she does look damn good. Stacy rocked this awards season so hard that perhaps George will consider extending her contract and keeping her around as arm candy for the next awards season as well.

7. Sandra Bullock: Not everyone on The Interwebs liked this gown, but I really love it. Yes, the top looks a tad baggy now that I see it in a photo. But I thought she looked divine on the red carpet.

6. Milla Jovovich: I don't really know why she was there, but she looked stunning. Like an ice queen.

5. Octavia Spencer: I'm having trouble remembering what else Octavia has worn for her awards sweep this season, but I'm pretty sure this is the best she's looked. If only she'd worn lipstick.

4. Natalie Portman: Polka dots! She wore polka dots to the Academy Awards! I love her for that.

3. Maya Rudolph: I've been moaning about how the women of comedy (coughKristenAmyTinacough) have been dressing poorly all season long, but when it mattered Maya came through. I thought she looked beautiful.

2. Penelope Cruz: I'm not usually a Penelope fan, because she often wears giant princess skirts on the red carpet and that's not my thing. But this was just princessy enough without making me want to gag, and in a gorgeous color. Just stunning.

1. Emma Stone: This was a polarizing dress at the party I watched the Oscars at, but I loved it. LOVED IT. I know, some people did not like the bow at the neck. But I like it! The color is stunning, she looks so tall and statuesque, I love the flow of the skirt. I just think it was a major fashion win on a very stylish young star - and she absolutely nailed her gig as presenter later that night. Good job, Emma Stone!

Now it's your turn! Who were your favorites?

The Oscars: Fashion Fails

2012-02-27T09:32:00.000-04:00

Last night's Oscars red carpet was disappointing, don't you think? I had high hopes since a lot of my favorite actresses really brought their A-games for the Golden Globes, but there weren't very many gowns on the red carpet last night that really blew me away. (There were a few though, so go check out my post on the best dresses from last night as well!)

Of course, there are always going to be mishaps and mistakes on the red carpet. So let's talk about those!

Cameron Diaz: I'm glad Cameron Diaz is back to short hair because I think it really suits her, but this nude, tight, strapless gown just didn't stand out to me at all. Yawn.
Berenice Bejo: I love Berenice, and she's French a.k.a. stylish, so I expected good things. And this dress is nice. Helen Mirren would have looked lovely in it. But for her? Too old.
Glenn Close: The jacket. The big problem is the jacket. (Didn't she know about Jennifer Hudson?)
Ellie Kemper: I love Ellie Kemper and I wanted to like this dress, but it was the same color as her hair. And that really bothered me.

Jessica Chastain: I wanted to like this dress, but it really didn't do Jessica's figure any favors, did it?
Meryl Streep: Another awards show, another fancy bathrobe...
Michelle Williams: This was *almost* cute, but I just hate tiered skirts.
Angelina Jolie: Boring. I expect better. And she was overposing to show off the big slit.

Shailene Woodley: I know some people liked this, but it reminded me of a science fiction movie costume or something.
Tina Fey: Guess what? Wearing a dress with a built-in apron that covers your midsection is not slimming. It's just uncomfortable.
Viola Davis: Oh man, this was SO close to making my five worst dresses list. I don't mind the short hair, although I do wish it had been styled more. (See: Any photo of Halle Berry.) But the dress? What is going on with her boobs? Why are they pushed around like that? Ow!
Kristen Wiig: Is Kristen Wiig allergic to color? Has she ever seen a rainbow? Does she have a stylist with stock in beige dresses that look like dishrags? What is going on???

And now, the Worst Five:

5. Gwyneth Paltrow: Only Ms. Goop herself would show up in a damn cape. Without the cape it was an OK dress, but I refuse to forget that she WORE A FREAKING CAPE TO THE OSCARS.

4. Melissa McCarthy: I was really hoping Melissa would rock it, but this dress was just bad news. In particular, the bodice. It was just a bad decision.

3. Rooney Mara: I don't think this photo does the dress justice - how much I disliked it, anyway. It was too stiff, too structured, too hard. Drop the Lisbeth Salandar act, Rooney, and relax a little.

2. Jennifer Lopez: At the party I was at, the ladies were all in agreement that this dress was a bad move. Too tight, too revealing, too dated - honestly, at first I thought I was looking at footage of J-Lo from 2002. She hasn't aged, but unfortunately her style hasn't either.

1. Melissa Leo: It almost seems unfair to put Melissa on this list, because she so often looks like a trainwreck on the red carpet. It's like she's wearing glittery pyjamas. She should lend them to Meryl Streep for next year's Golden Globes.

OK, head to the comments, y'all! Who was your choice for worst dressed?

The Office: Don't let the bed bugs bite

2012-02-24T10:51:00.003-04:00

I'm still not sold on this Tallahassee storyline on The Office, but there were moments from last night's episode that I thought really worked, and others that didn't.

I don't like Packer, and I don't like Nellie. I'm getting kind of annoyed with the idea of Dwight and Packer competing for the VP job by flirting with her. It feels like a recycled, stereotypical storyline and I want it to get more creative.

I did like the Jim/Cathy/Dwight stuff, though. I never thought Jim would cheat on Pam, and watching him deal with what he was pretty sure were signals from Cathy with intense discomfort was hilarious. I loved how he brought Dwight in to get rid of her by pretending he saw a bed bug.

Cathy, of course, I don't like. The little tramp! She was being so obvious with Jim and when he called her out on it she made him feel like a jerk. And then she kept pushing boundaries! The final shot of Jim and Dwight watching TV in bed together was a clever little resolution.

Then we also had the stuff with Ryan and Erin, which was a fun little addition to what was going on in the hotel that night. Ryan thought he had a shot with Erin, who still plans to move to Tallahassee, and he was pursuing her with all his best moves until he discovered that she'd want to wait six months before sleeping with him. Whoops! And he's back in love with Kelly.

The problem with The Office right now - or, one of the problems, anyway - is that the focus is now split. We had three storylines going on in Tallahassee, and another one going on in Scranton. That's a lot for one episode. In Scranton, Val's boyfriend dropped some food off when the gang had to work late and also dropped a bomb - that he thinks Darryl and Val are sleeping together. They're not, but he found some scandalous texts like "You're a good friend....." - FIVE periods, count 'em!

Andy told Darryl to lay off because Val has a boyfriend, but Pam told him to put himself out there like Jim had back in the day with her. So Darryl did, but we don't know what will happen. I like Val, so I'm hoping these two hook up. Yet, I didn't feel that invested in the storyline and I can only think it's because enough time wasn't spent on it.

What did you guys think? The Office is definitely having a weak season, but even by those standards I didn't love this episode.

Favorite quotes and moments:

I loved the cold open. It reminded me of how funny The Office used to be.
"One waffle, with your maple-iest syrup," - Erin's order at the hotel bar
"A real man swallows his vomit when a lady is present." - Dwight
This was a great episode for little Kelly Kapoor moments. I'm glad Mindy Kaling is getting her own show and I hope it's funny, but I'll miss having her on The Office.

Up All Night: Hustle and Flow

2012-02-24T10:31:00.001-04:00

What I liked about Up All Night was that by highlighting some of Chris and Reagan's differences, it showed that they're really not that different after all.

Reagan is a Type A personality, and Chris is more laid back. But when Reagan decided to give in and just go with the flow, Chris realized that everything that usually bugs Reagan would bug him too - he just usually gets to let her take care of that.

This week, the thing bugging them was a joint birthday party for Amy and the baby of the annoying next door neighbors. Chris panicked and agreed to it when Reagan wasn't around, and it was a doozy. So instead of having a small, friends/family/playgroup party for Amy, they were stuck hosting Gene and Terry's massive family - most of whom lacked even an ounce of social etiquette. You could identify their people because, as Ava said, they were the ones with "pleated khakis, polar performance fleece, and denim shirts with Looney Tunes on them."

There was also a subplot involving Ava thinking she was Amy's godmother when, in fact, she's not. I really like what this show has done with the Ava character, and the fact that she was hurt in a cares-about-Amy way and not a cares-about-Ava way.

I really think Up All Night has found its rhythm and delivered another solid, funny, enjoyable episode here. What did you guys think?

Funny quotes & moments:

Transgressions by guests included an old man resting his feet on the cheese, someone using the bathroom in the bedroom, and someone actually doing a load of laundry.
That portrait of Amy? Hilariously hideous.
"Has society broken down? What is this, Mad Max?" - Chris
Chris and Reagan laughing while continuing to reject the idea of a joint second birthday party.

Parks and Recreation: Hit and a Miss

2012-02-24T10:11:00.003-04:00

I really liked last night's episode of Parks and Recreation, but unfortunately with one glaring exception.

It's officially a terrible idea to put Tom and Ann together. In "Sweet Sixteen", in which Leslie and the parks department threw a party for Jerry, Ann and Tom got annoyed at each other, broke up, and got back together. All the while including April in their relationship drama, which she wanted no part in.

When April first suggested Ann and Tom go out, it came from an understandable and genuine place. Tom was the only guy making Ann laugh at the Valentine's Day dance. But now it's just not working out. Each one can't believe how uncool or annoying the other is. They got back together because they realized they were arguing over stupid reasons but, the thing is, they weren't. Ann doesn't know anything about 90 R&B music? Tom thinks embroidered Samuel L. Jackson style hats are cool? These are indications that you have nothing in common!

The one reason Tom and Ann could be a good idea is because it's obvious it's making Chris jealous, or at the very least making him question his own, lonely life. I wouldn't be opposed to seeing Ann and Chris get back together.

OK now, with that out of the way let's start from the top. This was a great Jerry episode. Of course Jerry was born on February 29! Of course his wife barely acknowledges his birthday! Of course no one invited Jerry to his own birthday party!

With her campaign in full swing and all her duties at the parks department, Leslie was stretched thin. So thin that Ron insisted she take a leave of absence but, of course, Leslie was resisting. She even forgot about Jerry's birthday - although, wouldn't she anyway? It's Jerry.

Since Jerry was turning 64, but only gets a real birthday every four years, this was his sweet sixteen. So Leslie got to work on a party, hosted at Donna's secret lake house, but then so many things got in her way. By the time she got Jerry to the party, everyone was asleep or out looking for Andy's lost dog, Champion.

Finally, Leslie agreed to cut her hours down to ten a week, and luckily we found out that if she wins her city council seat she can maintain her position at the parks department.

This certainly wasn't Parks' strongest episode, but I still think a weak episode of Parks and Recreation is better than almost everything else on TV. What did you guys think of "Sweet Sixteen"? Are you ready for this Tom/Ann (Tan?) foolishness to go away?

Funny quotes and moments:

The Chris Traeger and Champion the three-legged dog stuff was awesome. He trained him in German! And it was painfully obvious, even to Andy, that Chris is a far better pet owner.
"Did he grow his leg back?!?" - Andy, when Chris says Champion is healthier than ever
Leslie's botched campaign sign? Hilarious. Also hilarious, the sign store was "Signtologist".
What was going on with Jerry in that bath?
"The Meagles are cold people." - Donna
Donna's plethora of house rules
The entire Ginuwine bit.

The Big Bang Theory: Shave and a haircut...

2012-02-24T09:36:00.002-04:00

Taking Sheldon out of his comfort zone will always provide laughs on The Big Bang Theory, so when Sheldon wasn't able to get his regular haircut on last night's episode I knew we were in for some solid comedy. His barber - the one with all his :haircut records" that his mom sent from Texas! - was in a coma, and rather than go to someone strange and inexperienced, Sheldon let his hair grow.

It was a pretty simple concept, but one that delivered. Sheldon has displayed such strong signs of Autism Spectrum for a while now, so it was no surprise that one little wrench thrown into his regular routine caused a complete upheaval in his universe. He played bongos in the middle of the night and didn't even flinch when he saw Penny sitting in his spot. He didn't even care about the roommate agreement!

Eventually, the chaos was too much for his friends to handle and he agreed to let Penny cut his hair. She did fine...until she was cleaning up his neck and he giggled, flinching and caused her to shave a big patch on the back of his head. Let's hope Sheldon's regular routine doesn't include checking out the back of his head!

Meanwhile, Howard left for astronaut training and was as terrible at it as you'd expect. This is pretty funny, and I like seeing Howard put in a position where he knows he sucks but wants to keep going anyway. It was really sweet when Bernadette showed up at the hotel to support him, and I kind of wish they hadn't gone the easy joke route of having his mother in the adjoining room.

What did you guys think of "The Werewolf Transformation"? I didn't think it was the funniest episode the show has ever delivered, but solidly average.

Funny lines and moments:

Sheldon thinks nepotism is rampant in the barber industry.
Leonard's unwillingness to admit Penny beat him at chess was both funny and incredibly unappealing. Be a man and admit defeat, Leonard!
Penny: "I used to cut my brother's hair. I could do it for you."
Sheldon: "I know you mean well, offering the skills of the hill folk, but here in town we don't churn our own butter, we don't make dresses from gunny sacks, and sure-as-shootin don't get our hair cut by bottle blon-"
Leonard: "Sheldon be nice!"
Penny: "OK, what just happened?"
Leonard: "I don't know. Between you playing chess like Bobby Fisher, and Sheldon being ok with you in his spot, I'm guessing someone went back in time, stepped on a bug and changed the course of human events."
"My pee is like toothpaste." - Howard
Penny: "Where are you going?"
Sheldon: "Wherever the music takes me kitten."

Modern Family: Family Secrets

2012-02-23T11:26:00.002-04:00

Leave it to Modern Family to tackle the idea of a dad finding out his teenage daughter isn't a virgin anymore with just the right amount of heart and humor. I really, really enjoyed last night's episode, "Virgin Territory".

You're Ruining Brunch

It all began at a brunch at Casa Dunphy, when the conversation turned to admitting past wrongdoings now that the "statute of limitations" had run out. Claire admitted to Jay that it was she, not her mom, that had left the top down in the convertible the day it rained - and she did that to air out the cigarette smoke! Jay laughed it off and confessed that he once said he missed Claire and Mitch's figure skating competition because he was stuck at work, but he was actually drunk at the golf course. And then Mitch chimed in that the time he went golfing with his dad, Jay hadn't actually gotten a hole in one - Mitch had kicked the ball in because he was bored.

Uh-oh. The statute of limitations doesn't apply when it's your shining moment in sports, a moment that has earned you a plaque at the golf course, a lifetime of free lemonade and the nickname "Ace". Later, Mitch made it even worse when he accidentally revealed the truth to Jay's golf buddies. They recovered though, and reminisced about Mitch's first beer - a moment Mitch had forgotten, thinking it was actually the day of the hole-in-one. Mitch and Jay might not have the closest of relationships, but this was a nice way of showing that the love is still there.

Crime of Cuteness

Meanwhile, Manny and Luke were miffed that their roles as Family Cutie-Pies have been usurped by Lily. This was something I couldn't really buy - I know Luke has used cuteness to his advantage in the past, but aren't he and Manny a little old to be jealous of a toddler? (Raise your hand if you were waiting for Luke to say "I liked the old, mute, stonefaced Lily better.") They set a trap to try and blame Lily for some spilled milk, which led to a different, more hilarious outcome. It was Cam who took the cookie bait, and he slipped and hurt his back.

Or so we thought! Once everyone was out of the house and Cam was "resting his sore back", he took to work searching Claire's house for a piece of Tupperware she borrowed and never returned. He even got rid of the boys by giving them 20 bucks to clean his car, which is when Luke and Manny's storyline finally got funny. They decided to drive the car down the street to impress a girl, and it was absolutely hysterical. Especially when they couldn't turn it around and had to drive it in reverse back home.

Yoga, No-ga

Meanwhile, Cam encouraged Gloria to follow Claire to yoga after Claire left her behind. He said it was to help build their friendship, but it was actually so he could keep searching for the missing Tupperwear. Claire was an uber-bitch to Gloria when she showed up, but we eventually learned the reason why: Claire doesn't go to yoga, she goes to the shooting range to relieve some stress. Little did she know, Gloria is an expert gunslinger!

When they returned home, Cam had spotted the Tupperwear in question and was trying to reach it - and why Cam thought an open drawer would support his large body, no one will ever know. But the resulting crash was pretty hilarious, especially since he followed it with "This had a lid?"

Dollface

The best storyline of the episode though, was Phil discovering his firstborn was no longer a virgin. I loved how the writers didn't make a huge deal out of this development. It wasn't a major revelation. In fact, Claire already knew. Alex already knew - and she blew it for Haley when she misheard Phil say "Haley's aversion" as "Haley's a virgin" and burst out laughing.

Phil is a goof, but he's not stupid. He knew what Alex's laughter meant, and he panicked. Since he had taken Haley, Alex and Lily to the mall to get Lily's doll fixed, there was a lot of awkward talking about the doll but not really the doll.

I loved how Phil told the mockumentary camera what he wished he'd said, because he wants to be a cool dad. And then we saw what he actually said, which was uncomfortable but very very sweet. And Haley told the camera "I have a cool dad." It was just a really sweet, natural father-daughter moment and I loved how it was handled.

So what did you guys think? Classic Modern Family episode or you weren't that into it?

Favorite quotes and moments:

"They didn't used to label babies as carefully in hospitals, so for two days..." - Phil, who was about to reveal that he either took the wrong baby or was the wrong baby, but someone cut him off
"There are blind models? That's so sad, they can't see how pretty they are!" - Gloria
Luke: "My mom hates messes."
Manny: "I'm familiar with Claire."
"She’s like a dream wrapped in a wish poured into jeggings." - Manny, on his latest crush
"Do you know what a doll is in my village? An apple on a fork!" - Gloria, upon hearing that Lily's $200 doll has medical insurance and a deductible
"Revenge is a dish best served cold...and even better two days later out of a 24-ounce, microwave friendly, burp-sealed pack-and-store." - Cam
Claire: “I just want to go lie down in a dark room and breathe.”
Gloria: “That sounds like yoga.”
"She promised she wouldn't tell Dad until after I left for college, which means that he may never have found out." - Haley
"I live with four teenagers! You live with two adults!" - Claire to Gloria
Alex with her lookalike doll, and Phil's reaction when she asked him to buy it for her.

Raising Hope: Good Signs

2012-02-23T10:45:00.001-04:00

Just a quick post about Tuesday's episode of Raising Hope, which was the first installment since Jimmy and Sabrina finally got together.

When shows to a will-they-or-won't-they storyline, the fear is often that the characters will lose their appeal once they're finally in a relationship. I don't think this has to happen, and I was delighted to get an episode of Raising Hope on Tuesday that was just as funny and charming as any of the ones the show did before Jimmy and Sabrina got together. In fact, I think this was one of Sabrina's best episodes.

Jimmy discovered that Sabrina isn't perfect - specifically, she sleeps with pantyhose on her head because of an intense fear of spiders laying eggs in her ears. Since that actually happened to her as a kid, I'd say it's a pretty legitimate fear. Wyatt had convinced her to take medication for her fears and once she decided to go off them, Jimmy tried to help her overcome her fear by facing it instead. Kudos to Lucas Neff and Cloris Leachman for pulling off those scenes with the tarantulas!

So what did you guys think of Raising Hope? Agree that it was as funny as always, or do you wish Jimmy & Sabrina had never happened?

Survivor: I am woman, hear me groan

2012-02-23T10:16:00.001-04:00

The second episode of Survivor: One World was certainly more interesting than the unfortunate premiere, but after watching the women make complete fools of themselves I know one thing for sure: The women either need to get their act together, or the tribes need to be shaken up after a few weeks -- if not, we could be looking at a Survivor: Palau situation.

Now, before we dive into the recap I'm sure you're all dying to know who Rob and I got in the office Survivor pool. We got...Kim! I'm very happy with this. She was our third choice (My top five rankings were Bill, Chelsea, Kim, Jay, Sabrina) and I think she could go far in the game. Fingers crossed, please!

DIY Challenge

The women returned from hearing the news about Kourtney to be greeted by the men, who kindly informed them that they'd tended to the fire while they were away. OK. Nice, right? Kat didn't think so, because the fire is her job. What? Kat. It's not like they were applying for your job. They're not even on your tribe. You were at Tribal Council, they kept your fire going. If you ask me, that's too nice. I would've thrown a bucket of water on it and called it a night.

Christina, Monica and Kim

Before going to bed, Christina pulled Alicia aside and asked if they could clear the air. They said a lot of generic things along the lines of "I wasn't trying to offend you" and "I'm sorry if you took it that way" and "What you said came off as rude." Classic passive-aggressive girl bickering. Alicia gave Christina a "Don't even worry about it, girl!" hug and then immediately told the camera "Please. If I saw her swimming in the ocean and she was drowning I’d probably look the other way." Ready? These are words I'm sure I'll be saying alllllll season: This woman is a special needs teacher!

The women decided they needed a tribe leader and nominated Sabrina. I like Sabrina, but now I'm glad I didn't get her in the pool. Tribe leaders often end up with big targets on their backs, and leading this tribe will be more difficult than herding cats. Proving that she has the emotional intelligence and sense of responsibility of a 13 year old, Kat shirked her duty of finding food and went to hang out in the water with Alicia, gushing "Do you think we're like, in so much trouble right now because we're not doing anything?" Well, you're not going to get sent to the principal's office if that's what you're worried about, Kat, but you *might* starve to death.

And then it was time for the Do-It-Yourself challenge. Who knew Jeff Probst and his "Come on in, guys!" were such valuable aspects of Survivor? I don't know why they keep trying this idea of a host-less challenge, but I think it sucks. Without Probst's play-by-play, it was very difficult to tell who was truly in the lead during the challenge. For a reward of a tarp, the tribes had to untie a bunch of rope from a large ring. At first it seemed like the ladies had it, but alas, the men came out on top again.

Odd One Out

I would not watch "Colton's World"

We need to talk about Colton. I cannot stand this kid. He's obnoxious, arrogant, entitled, whiny...I could go on, but I'm sure you get it. Colton has painted himself as the victim in this game, but he's only a victim of his own stupidity. So you don't like your tribe? You don't feel like you fit in? Too bad! Suck it up! This is Survivor, not summer camp.

Not only is Colton supremely lazy when it comes to doing work around camp, but he doesn't even want to hang out around his own camp. While all the guys were working on stuff, he was actually trying to help the women with their shelter! What? What is wrong with you? This is absolutely the best way to make sure you're voted out first. And not only is he doing everything in his power to alienate himself from his own tribe, but Colton's behavior is annoying the women as well. They actually had to tell him to leave, more than once.

Colton thinks he is OK because he has the immunity idol and he thinks he's in with the women. Well the idol will only save you from one tribal council, buddy, and the women can't help you until you make it to the merge. So right now, your focus should be getting to the merge. (I think there will be a tribe shuffle at some point before the merge, but one can't count on that.)

At least Colton did manage to forge himself a little alliance, by showing the idol to Troy and Jonas. Was he inspired by Tarzan's banana-hammock dance? Who knows. At least he has finally acknowledged that in Survivor, you are sometimes required to associate with people you would not normally be friends with. Now they're hoping that they have an alliance of five (Colton, Troyzan, Tarzan, Jonas and Leif) that will be able to pick off the stronger dudes. But fortunately for them, we didn't get to see that plan in action this week.

What a Boob

Immunity challenge time! This challenge was simple, but provided a lot of drama and tension. The tribes would have to line up on a balance beam and, one at a time, cross it passing everyone else on the tribe to get to a platform. The twist was that you could only be touching one person at a time.

For the guys, the challenge was a breeze. For the women, not so much. They were brought down by a combination of stupidity and large breasts, both real and fake. The problem, no surprise to anyone, was Kat. Not only did Kat absolutely suck at the challenge, but she jumped into the water twice when she didn't have to. Just sucking at the challenge could have been forgivable, since Christina also blew it. The only person to make it all the way through was Monica. But Kat is Just. So. Dumb.

Kat's incompetence brought out divisions in the tribe (mostly based on age) that had been simmering all along. Monica was diplomatic in voicing her disappointment, saying "I’m sad. I'm sad for women. This isn't what women are. Frankly, I’m so embarrassed." Nina wasn't so polite, saying "Kat, you jumped in the water twice. You dumb blond. Twice! Quit being such a dumb broad." Now, normally I'd say Nina's words were a bit harsh. But then Kat farted on Alicia as a joke. Farted on her! That is so gross.

Kat's dismal performance in the challenge and her immature behavior around camp caused Chelsea and Kim to question their Day One alliance. They were tempted to save Nina and vote out Kat instead, but they didn't want to lose the trust of the rest of their alliance. I knew they wouldn't go for it. I think Chelsea and Kim are both smart, savvy women. It was too early to turn on their own alliance, and I don't think Alicia would have been willing to cut Kat loose just yet.

Tribal Trials

At Tribal Council, Jeff Probst was scathing in his comments to the women. "You’re off to one of the worst starts ever in this game because of the absolute and total dysfunction within this group," he sneered. Seriously, Probst? It's only the second tribal council, and I don't think Kourtney's broken wrist can be attributed to the dysfunction within the group. I've always been annoyed at how Probst seems to openly favor the "golden boy" stereotype in this game (i.e. Colby 1.0), and in this all-female tribe he seems more condescending than ever.

Probst also asked Nina if the tribe was aware of her background, which I thought was out of line. Um, what if the answer had been "No", Probst? Are people not allowed to lie about their professions anymore? In this case Nina tried to use her experience as an L.A. cop to her advantage, but in pre-show interviews she said she might not share that information. Had Probst blown my cover, I'd be mad. Kat was also asked about the experience she brings to the table, and she mumbled something about selling things outside and then said she only tries things she knows she'll succeed at. What a winner! Should I assume she majors in Farting at college, then?

However, the tension within the tribe is palpable and eventually both Chelsea and Sabrina admitted that if they could have a do-over, they'd form a different alliance. I knew the women would still vote out Nina because, frankly, Nina is older and not that much of an asset. But if I were Monica, I'd play my cards very carefully. There is enough discontent within this alliance that I can see Sabrina, Kim and Chelsea opting to ditch Kim in favor of a woman who is much smarter and physically fit - so, Monica.

As expected, Nina was voted out of the tribe. I felt bad because she hadn't really done anything to deserve it, but there just wasn't enough about Nina to warrant keeping her over Kat. Had the decision come down to Monica vs. Kat I think it would have been different, but neither Nina or Christina have made overwhelmingly integral contributions to the tribe.

The women really need to pull it together, but based on the scenes from next week I'm not sure that'll happen. They're back to begging the boys for fire embers, and Chelsea - one of the seemingly toughest gals on the tribe - is sobbing in the shelter during a rainstorm about how cold she is.

What do you guys think? Good episode? Can the women recover from a rough start, or are they doomed?

Sweet Home Alabama: Interview with Paige

2012-02-22T16:24:00.000-04:00

You guys had a lot to say about last week's episode of Sweet Home Alabama, so Paige took some time to chat with me today about the show. Obviously, I had to start by asking her about her date with Jeremiah!

Paige said she wanted to take Jeremiah to the vet's office because the little chocolate lab puppies were so cute, and because Jeremiah had told her his dog was hit by a milk truck. "I wanted to show him a little of what I do, like he showed me with the combine. Then we went back to where I live and just talked. He doesn't really open up when the cameras are around," Paige said.

Paige said the date was "intense" and that she asked Jeremiah a lot of questions because she wanted him to open up. "I said I think I'm falling in love with you, and he didn't reciprocate it, so that was hard. He asked if I meant it and I said yes, and he said his heart was beating so fast and he was scared."

And then the date was over - the producers of the show separate them, and they're not allowed to talk or anything while the cameras aren't on.

"I understand because on season two, you know, Tribble would say something to you and other girls would say he said things to them, and you never knew...I didn't have feelings for Tribble but a lot of the other girls did, so I know what it's like. I just put myself in his shoes and thought if I would've had feelings for Tribble, I would've been guarded too."

As for the gym, Paige said no, none of the guys knew she was going to be there. "I was walking up and they [the producers] told me 'They don't know you're coming, it's going to be a surprise' and I thought that would be funny since they'd probably be working out and be all sweaty. We girls got to go to the gym too, usually a couple times a week, and it's one of the only times you get to leave the house. So it probably just seemed like one of those regular outings."

As for the fight, Paige said she heard lots about it. "The guys would always tell me and joke about it. You know, when you're on a date you talk about what's going on in your life so I'd always ask how things are going, or what did you do last night. And they'd say, 'Oh, a fight broke out last night!' They're like brothers and can laugh it off."

"And you know, it's inevitable. There are different personalities and no phone or Internet, they're all dating the same girl and feelings are developing. The girls would just cry every night, instead of fighting they'd go into their rooms and cry. You can't talk to the other people in the house about it because they also have feelings for this person."

Paige says she was told the fight we saw actually happened after elimination, so on top of being worked up about their date Jeremiah was also upset that Donny, his best friend in the house, had gone home.

"What I heard was a whole fight broke out in the house which they didn't show, everyone was screaming and someone spit on someone else. If you throw a punch you get kicked out, but there was nothing they could do...and they had given him [Jeremiah] three glasses of whiskey and then he was caught at a bad moment."

Paige said she didn't have a chance to talk to Jeremiah at elimination, so at this point in the show she has "no idea what's going on in his head."

"I was really upset at elimination, everything was just getting to me. I didn't talk to the guys long because I was on the verge of tears and I didn't want to cry in front of them. So I only talked to the ones I brought in to see me."

Paige wondered if maybe she'd scared Jeremiah away. "My daddy always says 'Don't chase a guy or he'll run away from you' and I was asking him all these questions...I just thought, good grief, I seem like a crazy girl."

This week, Paige says, we can look forward to her and Big Shaun going on a date that's "taking him way out of his element. We're going to a dark and dirty place. He won't have his hairspray!"

Cougar Town: Co-MoHs!

2012-02-22T12:37:00.000-04:00

This.

Cougar Town is a show I don't write about in a lot of detail, because while I find it to be generally pleasant, enjoyable and funny it doesn't always provide me with a lot to say. So instead, I bring you Five Things I Loved About Cougar Town This Week:

1. Jules choosing a Maid of Honor
It seemed inevitable that Jules would divide Maid of Honor duties between Ellie and Laurie because Ellie is her oldest friend, but Laurie would be way better at it. So I liked that the episode didn't take long to get to that decision, but instead focused on the reactions to it - like Ellie's hissing!
2. Travis and Grayson visiting Jules' dad
This was just pure, comedic fun.
3. The Zipline
A hair-brained well-intentioned idea, just like Bobby. It was also a nice way to show how Bobby is going out of his way to demonstrate that he's OK with Jules getting married. Plus, it looked crazy fun.
4. Thanks babe!
5. Spoiler!

Bonus Quote:
Jules: "Ellie, I love you so much. I want to ask you something."
Ellie: "Are we finally running away together? Because I keep a bag in my truck!"
Jules: "Me too!"
Ellie: "Awesome."

New Girl: Well bully for you!

2012-02-22T12:26:00.001-04:00

I liked last night's episode of New Girl because it offered us another taste of Jess's life at work, and a deeper peek into Schmidt and CeCe's blossoming relationship as friends with benefits. However, in comparison to the last couple episodes that have been outstandingly funny, "Bully" was only so-so.

Schmidt's storyline, as always, made me laugh. Turns out he's pretty good in bed, and CeCe just can't resist making regular, secret visits to his bedroom. Yet, she's still embarrassed to be seen in public with him. Schmidt doesn't back down though, and he did manage to convince CeCe to go for breakfast with him. It turns out that CeCe isn't just avoiding being seen in public with Schmidt because he's, well, he's Schmidt. It's also because she's sick of guys who only want to show her off like a trophy. I can definitely see these two as an actual couple, and I wouldn't be opposed to the show going there.

Schmidt's love life is on the upswing, but Nick's is not. He freaked out after Julia sent him a cactus, because it meant she was breaking up with him. She thinks he can't take care of a real plant! He couldn't even take care of the cactus, but that wasn't why she sent it. Unfortunately, the seven increasingly needy voicemails Nick left Julia were a major turnoff, and she dumped him. Is this really the last we'll see of Lizzy Caplan? I expected more, and this was sort of a weak way to end that relationship - even though it was pretty funny to watch.

Meanwhile, Jess was dealing with a snotty kid at school who made a YouTube video mocking Jess's singing. After being thrown zinger after zinger by Brianna, Jess cracked and broke her science project - a robot arm. With help from Winston (who brought along Nick, who was busy masking his heartberak with creepy over-enthusiasm) Jess tried to fix the robot arm in time for the science fair, but the damage was obvious. Brianna's lesbian moms demanded Jess be reprimanded, but instead she was just congratulated by the school's wacky principal for joining the "kid hater" club.

Jess kind of got back at Brianna by making her sing a silly song too, but my problem was that there wasn't much resolution here. Brianna doesn't like Jess, and that's OK, but she can't be mean. That was it - and I kind of hoped for more.

It wasn't my favorite episode, but there were still funny jokes! Check out my favorites below and share your thoughts in the comments.

Nick [about Schmidt's latest hook-up]: "What's wrong with her? She have a hunchback?"
Winston: "Dwarf parts?"
Schmidt: "She happens to be an incredibly beautiful woman."
Nick: "Is she another one of your heavy gingers, Schmidt?"
Winston: "How big are her knuckles?"
Jess: "Does she have a Hitler mustache?" [Everyone stops laughing and looks at Jess]
Jess: "I'm sorry, it's just...like, I want to banter with you guys in the morning. I just, like, panicked, and I made a Hitler joke, I'm sorry."
"Was it a mistake? Was she wearing some kind of disguise?" - Jess, on Schmidt sleeping with the same girl twice
"Who do I speak to RE: getting something removed from the Internet?" - Jess
Some other science fair projects included "What can old people do?" and "Does it taste better with hot sauce?"

Parenthood: Love is all around

2012-02-22T11:42:00.001-04:00

Leave it to Parenthood to fill an episode with developments (or possible developments) that I didn't want to see happen, yet still make me love the episode.

I wasn't rooting for Crosby and Jasmine to get back together. I really hope Zoey doesn't decide to keep the baby. I was worried about Amber's relationship with Bob and I don't want to see her lose a good career opportunity because of it. Yet even though the show didn't go where I would have hoped last night, I found myself being swept up in all the emotions.

Camping Trip

OK, let's begin with Jasmine and Crosby. These two have always had feelings for each other, we've known that. Crosby has never forgiven himself for screwing up with Jasmine. Jasmine cheated on Joe with Crosby, and she was jealous when she saw him with his new girlfriend. And yet, I didn't think they'd get back together. Jasmine was planning on moving in with Joe, Crosby seemed happy with Lily.

Because they are co-parents who try and have a good relationship, both Jasmine and Crosby were accompanying Jabbar on a class camping trip in the school playground. But Jasmine decided not to sleep overnight, and we all knew why. As the family sat around the campfire, a different kind of spark was flying. Jasmine and Crosby will always have something, because feelings are complicated and they have a kid together.

Thanks to some adorable badgering from Jabbar, Jasmine decided to sleep in the tent after all and in the middle of the night Crosby confided in her about how he was filled with regret about screwing everything up, about losing his chance to be a family. It was heartbreaking and honest, but I wasn't sure it would change anything.

Then, the next morning as everyone packed up their camping stuff in the pouring rain, Jasmine made a decision. She decided not to move in with Joe, but to ask Crosby if he'll still marry her. It all seems like it's moving too fast, and I can't help but think about how hurt both Joe and Lily will be, but at the same time you kind of have to be happy for them. You kind of have to hope that it works out. This isn't necessarily a storyline I wanted to see, but now that it's happening I want to know where it goes.

Million Dollar Deal

While Crosby was off reuniting his family, Adam was slowly creeping towards totally betraying his brother. The two had met with a big time recording executive, who offered them a deal - a million dollar deal - for The Luncheonette. As Adam said, they were being offered a million bucks because The Luncheonette is cool. Yeah, they're doing well, but they're not doing that well. But Crosby absolutely wouldn't consider it. (Something that Jasmine understood.)

I got where Crosby was coming from. It's not about the money for him, and it never will be. This is his dream, to own the Luncheonette and work for himself. You could give him half a million bucks, and what would he use it for? To open a new recording studio? Because that's what he wants, and he already has it.

Adam is in a different situation, and that's something I think the show has done a good job of slowly building to. Adam has more financial pressures at home than Crosby does and, more importantly, this was never his dream. This is just a business to Adam, and the good business decision would be to take the money and run.

Behind Crosby's back, Adam went for another drink with the exec. And he made another offer, a much bigger offer. I was actually OK with Adam going for a drink and talking, but it was when he shook the guy's hand and said he'd have to convince Crosby to change his mind that he lost me. You cannot force someone to change his mind. Therefore, you should not shake on your intention to do so. We didn't see what the new deal was, but it must be a ton of money.

New York, New York

Um, out of nowhere Mark suggests he and Sarah move to New York? What? This storyline was not OK with me. Mark just had a conversation with Drew about his intentions, and how Sarah isn't just going to go and start a whole new family. You know what would really make Drew feel like that's the case? If they have a new baby and move to New York, leaving her old life and old children back in California! That's what!

Obviously, this move will not happen. Sarah will realize that her children still need her. She won't want to leave her family, with whom she is abnormally close. It wouldn't make sense for the character (even though she's tempted, she'd never do it) and logistically it wouldn't make sense for the show. I wish we didn't know that Jason Ritter is a guest star, because it makes it hard for me to be invested in this relationship. Every time something comes up, I wonder "Will this be why they break up?" Now I find myself wondering if Mark will move to New York without Sarah.

I wasn't a huge fan of this storyline, but I really liked how the show brought Sarah into the Amber/Bob/Kristina situation. When Sarah found out that Amber quit her job, she went to talk to Kristina about it and basically spoke for every viewer who thought Kristina crossed a line last week. Why was Amber dating Bob such a bad thing? Was it hurting her job performance? Why did Kristina intervene? They had a fight, and Kristina realized she'd overreacted to the situation. There was also a nice moment where Kristina told Sarah it would be OK if she went to New York. Because even though Kristina crossed a line, she did it because she cares about Amber and wants to look out for her. And if Sarah moved, all the Bravermans would keep looking out for Amber and Drew.

Kristina went to talk to Amber, but poor Amber is still so confused. The scene where she crawled into bed with her mom and said she didn't want to talk about it was really sweet, and a great way to illustrate why Sarah won't go to New York. Nineteen isn't that old; her kids still need her.

Baby Complications

The story that really tore my heart out this week was Julia and Zoey's. For a storyline that began in a place not everyone loved, they turned it into one hell of an arc. I've always been a Julia fan (and I love Joel), but I know not everyone is and they've often been under-serviced on this series. But I really think the writers did great things with this adoption storyline.

The adoption process has been messy, emotional and painful. Zoey wanted a closed adoption, but she chose Julia and Joel because of what a good family they'd be for her baby. And because they are good people (and also quite meddlesome) they became very entrenched in Zoey's own life. We knew Julia and Zoey were, in a way, falling in love with each other. They legitimately care about each other in a way that would make an adoption very, very difficult.

Zoey had the baby, and the labor scenes were really well done. She didn't want to hold the baby, which is a very understandable decision. Julia went home and got Joel and Sydney so they could meet the new addition to their family. They were so excited. And then Julia saw Zoey holding the baby, smiling lovingly. They looked at each other. There were tears. Julia walked away...what does this mean? I never thought that Zoey would change her mind. I still believe that the adoption will go through. I think this is just one more way the writers are showing us what a terrifying, painful process adoption can be on both sides.

Next week is the season finale (eighteen episodes was NOT enough, NBC!), so expect a lot of emotion and some resolutions to season-long storylines. So, what did you guys think of this episode?

Glee: Two PSAs, One Episode

2012-02-22T10:41:00.000-04:00

This is an uncomfortable review to write. At first, I didn't mind last night's episode of Glee, called "On My Way". I think many of us knew there was always a strong possibility that the writers would go the teen suicide route with Karofsky's storyline. It's a very real, very difficult thing, and Glee likes to touch on those issues for better or for worse.

I was watching the episode on DVR, maybe 15 minutes behind everyone else, so at first when I glanced at Twitter I didn't understand why all the other Glee viewers were so enraged. But as the show progressed they lost me too, which is really a shame since I think they could have executed the Karofsy storyline in a much better way.

Instead of just the usual recap, I'm going to quickly summarize the episode and then talk about some of my problems with it.

Yes, this is really what you missed on Glee:

The episode began with a peek into what Karofsky's life is like now that he was spotted at Breadstix with Kurt. There is bullying. A lot of bullying, at school and online. This is the part of the episode that led me to believe it could be a really good episode. I thought the way Karofsky's attempt at suicide was depicted was really moving, as it played out while Blaine sang "Cough Syrup" by Young the Giant in the auditorium to Kurt. It's a great song, and I thought it was a very emotional, devastating scene.In fact, I'm annoyed that the rest of the episode was so dismally delivered, because I think this was one of the best scenes Glee has ever done, and likely ever will do.

We later learned that Karofsky's dad found him in time to get him to the hospital, where he was recovering. There was some teacher-student discussion about the event, which I'll get to, and then everyone headed off to Regionals where New Directions beat The Warblers and some creepy choir.

Then Rachel and Finn were to get married, because they'd bumped up their wedding date in a "live in the moment" type way after hearing about Karofsky. As they waited at city hall for Quinn to arrive, they showed Miss Fabray driving on her way there, looking at "WHERE ARE YOU??" texts from Rachel. It was painfully obvious, yet they dragged the moment out. And then, as Quinn sent a text reply to Rachel, BAM - she was hit by a car.

Now, let's talk about our problems with the episode. Here are mine:

1. Suicide won't make everyone change their ways

Yes, Mercedes mentioned that people at Karofsky's school were still being very, very cruel and writing things on his Facebook wall like "Try try again". But that was a very brief dose of a very harsh reality. What we saw more of was Sebastian, who'd been a jerk to everyone including Karofsky, feeling incredible remorse. I worry that it suggested attempting suicide or killing yourself will make everyone sorry. That it'll be a lesson for them. This is a terribly dangerous message to send, because guess what? IT WON'T.

Was Sebastian just saying that stuff about Karofsky and taking donations for Lady Gaga's charity so The Warblers will look good at Regionals? I thought that's what would happen, but we never saw evidence of that. Not that I noticed, anyway - by that point I may have been too busy ranting.

Similarly, I don't think Glee should have made Kurt so forgiving. I love Kurt as a character, but the problem with him has always been that the writers turn him into a saint. Now, he'd long forgiven Karofsky so it wasn't a surprise that he offered his support in the wake of the suicide attempt. And I also believe that Kurt would feel incredibly guilty since he'd turned down Karofsky at Breadstix (for totally appropriate reasons, and in a very polite and kind way) and was ignoring his phone calls. When something bad happens, people often blame themselves even if it wasn't their fault. If you'd ignored nine phone calls from someone who then committed suicide, you'd feel kind of sick to your stomach about it too.

Yet, I still have a problem with how quickly and easily Kurt forgave Karofsky. Was it the right thing for him to do? Yeah, maybe. It's incredibly mature and compassionate to be able to look past the bullying inflicted on yourself and see how much pain a person is in. But Kurt is a teenager. A human teenager. It would be more realistic for him to want nothing to do with Karofsky.

2. You can't compare pain

The conversation between Kurt and Quinn made me uncomfortable, mostly because it was never again addressed. Quinn was having trouble understanding how Karofsky could get to a place where he'd want to end his own life. I think the idea that "suicide is selfish" is a relatively common one, so I thought a discussion on this could be worthwhile. But instead of a conversation, instead of helping Quinn to have some more compassion, Saint Kurt came in and chastised her from his pulpit.

Kurt told Quinn that all she went through was having a baby in high school and a different hair color for a couple of weeks. That "everyone still loved you." Weeeeeelll, not quite, Kurt. Quinn was practically excommunicated by her parents. She was kicked out of her own home. She spent most of her pregnancy, the most difficult time of her life, moving from Finn's house to Puck's house to Mercedes' house until her mother finally came around, and left her father. We still don't know if Quinn has any kind of relationship with her dad or ever will. Kurt has also gone through struggles, but he's always had an incredibly supportive dad. You cannot compare their suffering, you just can't. Yet, did Kurt learn that lesson at any point? No.

3. Peanut butter doesn't make everything better

I don't know what would have been the appropriate way to address Karofsky's suicide attempt with his former classmates. I'm not an educator, I don't know how to handle these things. But was it giving peanut butter to an Irish kid?

Schu's speech to the kids about looking forward to things, and his own suicidal contemplation in high school all felt so minimizing. The discussion about what Karofsky was battling, about having compassion for someone who had been a bully, about what to do if YOU ever have feelings of hopelessness like he did -- that discussion needed to be far more serious than what was actually delivered.

A guy we know tried to kill himself so let's get married now instead of in May? A guy we know tried to kill himself so let's talk about our bright, shining futures? A guy we know tried to kill himself so let's go win Regionals? No, no, NO.

Since I just delivered a mini-rant on how you can't compare one person's suffering to another, I do not want to say that Schu's story about he contemplated suicide in high school because he was caught cheating felt small. Because that's not actually what I think. What I think is that Schu's story would have been a hell of a lot more moving if we knew anything about his parents. Are they really strict? Is he constantly afraid of disappointing them? What was his childhood like? There was no context or background to make Schu's story more realistic or emotional, so the scene just fell flat.

4. Song choices MUST be the right tone when delivering an episode like this

I think my biggest problem with this episode was that it had an inconsistent tone. When they showed Karofsky putting on a suit in preparation to hang himself as Blaine sang "Cough Syrup", that was the right tone. That scene had me in tears.

Then we got to Regionals, and the tone drastically shifted. The Warblers' performances were just bland, vanilla, and overly peppy for the mood of the episode. New Directions took it to an even more inappropriate level.

First of all, RAPPING? You're going to RAP at Regionals? Suicide aside, this was stupid. And the song, a mash up of Fly by Nicki Minaj ft. Rihanna and I Believe I Can Fly by R. Kelly was just too upbeat for this episode. The writers never should have put Karofsky's storyline and Regionals in the same episode.

And then, there is the kicker - the former Troubletones' performance of "Stronger" by Kelly Clarkson. When I saw this performance on YouTube on Tuesday afternoon, I loved it. But that was before I saw the episode. Singing "what doesn't kill me makes me stronger" in the context of a guy who tried to kill himself is just incredibly inappropriate. Especially when you're doing it with cheeky dance moves.

5. One lesson per episode, please

Speaking of inconsistent tone, ending the episode with Rachel and Finn's wedding also felt very strange. It's not like Karofsky almost died accidentally, and thus they were inspired to live in the moment. Their decision to move up their wedding date felt very strange.

And then Quinn happened, and we all saw it coming. I'm not going to say people should text and drive - if Oprah says it's dangerous then it is, you know? But this was one lesson too many for one episode. And did anyone else feel like this was just because Dianna Agron couldn't take being given such terrible, inconsistent material any longer? Quinn may not be dead, she could very easily remain on the show, but I'm kind of wishing she is killed off, just so Dianna Agron can go on to bigger and better things. And, obviously, they needed a way to postpone the wedding that I don't think will actually happen.

Now we're left with this stupid cliffhanger, which feels much more like a way to keep people thinking about Glee while it's on hiatus than a legitimate creative decision.

Other things that were weird or notable:

So, Sue is pregnant now? I felt like this needed more explanation than the way it was just slipped in to an already overcrowded episode. I did like that she acknowledged that she could have done more to help Karofsky, where as Figgins took the rather inexcusable position that it "wasn't our job to know" that Karofsky was having such desperate problems. I also like the idea of Sue helping Will and New Directions win Nationals, because I think at this point her role as villain in the Glee universe has been played out.

I know I said I didn't think Kurt realistically would have forgiven Karofsky so quickly, but he did and we were already there. So given that those two had already made peace, I liked the scene where Kurt encouraged Karofsky to imagine a life outside of Lima, ten years in the future. It was painful and beautiful, and another small, interesting moment that was overshadowed by other ridiculous things.

Did the writers seriously have Sebastian say "It's all fun and games..." without having him also say "until someone LOSES AN EYE???"

Brittany wants "Lord Tubbington to kick his ecstasy addiction." That was cute.

So...all those extra girls who were part of the Troubletones came back to dance for that performance, but still aren't in New Directions and have never been acknowledged?

OK, now it's your turn. Head to the comments and tell me why you did or didn't like this episode, if you'll ever watch it again, if you even liked the first scene, etc. Like many of you, I'm mad at this show, but I will watch the last eight episodes of the season. After that, I don't know.

How I Met Your Mother: 99 Yellow Umbrellas

2012-02-21T11:09:00.003-04:00

For those of you who were angry about last week's episode of How I Met Your Mother, I hope you enjoyed last night's episode. I know I did.

I would have been OK with Ted and Robin trying to be in a relationship again, but I liked how instead "No Pressure" was the culmination of everything we've seen so far this season. Ted's complicated relationship with Robin, which Victoria warned him about at the beginning of the season. Robin and Barney's messy, ill-timed feelings for each other. Lily and Marshall's roles as spectators. It all worked perfectly.

After dropping the "I love you bomb" on Robin, Ted didn't have a lot of time to talk about it with her because Robin had to jet off to Russia for work. So instead he was left to rehash the situation with Marshall and Lily. Lily kept giving Ted the worst advice on how to declare his love for Robin, and Barney knew why - he'd discovered their box of long term bets!

It was incredibly funny - Barney slept in Marshall and Lily's bed thanks to a drunk train trip gone awry (they didn't know this until they awoke) and when he misheard something Lily said he ransacked their house looking for a sex tape. Instead, he found a cash box marked "long term bets" and discovered that the couple had been placing bets on their friends' lives for years now. Hilarious ones, like whether Ted would go bald or Barney would die of murder. And, at one point, Lily bet Marshall that Ted would not end up with Robin. Hence, all her advice was designed to push the two apart. This kind of made Lily look like a bitch, but it was only because she really doesn't think Robin's the girl for Ted. Still, not Lily's most flattering moment.

My one problem with the episode was that Ted realized too easily that the reason Robin didn't love him back was because she's in love with Barney. I mean, there is such a thing as "she's just not that into you", Ted. But he had drunkenly seen Barney filling Robin's room with rose petals and candles, so I guess he did have some evidence to support his theory. Barney laid it all out on the table, how he'd dumped Nora and Robin backed out and didn't dump Kevin. But when Ted told Barney that she and Kevin had now broken up, he didn't really react. In fact, he wished Ted the best. Ted took Robin on a romantic, memory-filled date, but the chemistry just wasn't there. At the end of the night, Robin had to tell Ted she doesn't love him, and Ted had to tell Robin their "when we're 40" deal is off - the door can't be open for them anymore, not even a little bit.

I'm glad the show did this, and officially closed the door on Ted and Robin. The viewers needed it, and so did Ted's character. Marshall knew that, and as Ted's best friend he had to do what Ted couldn't. He had to tell Robin to move out of the apartment. Now Ted's free to get over his heartbreak and move on. And as we saw at the beginning of the episode, the next time he says "I love you" will be to The Mother.

Obviously, I wish we'd get to this moment sooner rather than later. I've long been part of the "I'm read to meet the mother" camp when it comes to HIMYM. And I know that seeing all those yellow umbrellas at the end of the episode could just be a tease, that the writers might not be planning to introduce her soon. But damn, how I wish they would.

What did you guys think of the episode? Was it a good recovery? Do you think it made sense for these characters to have to officially close the door like that? Will Robin and Barney find themselves together again - maybe for good?

Here are some of my favorite quotes and moments:

Ted and Lily's different interpretations of Robin's kiss and "We'll continue this when I get back."
Robin's nemesis Patrice, and the fact that they were going to Russia for the Moscow butter festival, were both delightful additions to the episode.
"Do you think that if we did it...and I did a really good job...that I could turn that into my baby?" - Barney
"I go camping in secret!"
Ted: "Barney that was my VCR."
Barney: "Ted, it was a VCR!"
"If you’ll excuse me, I have some sonnets to write!" - Ted, who is a douche when he's in love
Marshall saying "Not yet" leading up to Ted and Stella's wedding, every time Lily tries to collect on the bet - and then saying it again after everything that happened with Robin. We know Ted and Robin don't end up together, but Marshall will give anything a chance.
Conan!

Conan On 'How I Met Your Mother'

The Bachelor: A Visit to Blandsville, USA

2012-02-21T10:13:00.001-04:00

I think it's time I admit what I've always known: This season of The Bachelor is a dud. In fact, it's so boring that I'm almost thankful Courtney is on the show, because without her the season would have been a complete snooze. Ben is nice enough, but boring. If I hear him say "open up" one more time I'm going to lose it. I think the editors have removed all of the goofy, fun aspects of his persona and have only left in the boring, let's-talk-about-our-feelings moments, which I hate. As for the four women Ben visited in their hometowns this week, well, they're all a little boring too.

Pony Up

First, Ben traveled to Florida to spend some time with Lindzi, her parents, and their animals. Obviously, the first part of Lindzi's date with Ben involved horses. And a carriages. (What was up with that white horse and his stumpy little legs? Is that a special kind of horse?)

Over a picnic, Lindzi told Ben more about her past relationship, how they lived together and she thought she'd marry him, and how the breakup was really hard on her parents. It's basically Nicki's narrative, minus the marriage/divorce. Ben, of course, was glad Nicki was - say it with me, folks! - OPENING UP. (Everybody drink! No wait - you'd be in a coma by the end of the episode.)

While relaxing in the backyard at Lindzi's parents' mansion - OK, I'm gonna finish that thought, but hold up. Everyone on this show always has a huge, gorgeous house! It's insane! My theory is that only rich girls can afford to not work for six weeks so they can go on a "journey" to "find love". OK, so back to Ben and Lindzi and her parents. They discovered that Lindzi's parents had gotten married in the San Francisco city hall, where Ben and Lindzi had their first date, and instead of taking that as some Kristen Wiig on SNL style bragging, they took it as a sign. How sweet.

Later they all had a carriage race, there were some s'mores, and it was overall a cute date. Lindzi seems nice.

Dry Date

Next Ben hit the road for Tennessee, where Kacie greeted him with...a high school marching band and a baton twirling performance? Oh, honey, no. The baton twirling might have been cute when it was impromptu, but here it was just immature and a little creepy.

Kacie told Ben a little about her family, and he spent a lot of time freaking out. Her dad doesn't drink, she told him. "BUT I MAKE WINE!!!!" he panicked. Yikes. Is that a big deal? It was like she said "My dad doesn't do crack," and he was all "But giiiiiirl, I'm a drug dealer! How will we get along?"

Kacie then brought Ben to meet her parents and her sister. They hung out for a while, and then Kacie pulled her sister aside so she could blurt out "That's my future husband in there!" Do we think it was all the poor sister could do not to laugh? Meanwhile, Ben struggled to connect with Kacie's parents. He could barely get a response out of her dad, who eventually told him to let Kacie know if she's not the one, and then Kacie's mom only wanted to talk about how every season of The Bachelor ends with some wide-eyed innocent moving across the country to live in sin with a man. I guess no one had the heart to tell her that The Bachelor usually ends with two fame whores agreeing to marry one another only to break up six months later and go on a series of obnoxious he-said/she-said media interviews.

When the date was over, I knew either Nicki or Courtney would have to screw up pretty badly to manage to get eliminated. The Kacie date had not gone well.

Texas Forever

Next Ben went down to ~~Dillon,~~ Texas to visit Nicki. They walked around and Nicki dressed him up like a cowboy in a funny hat/boots/belt combo that made him look like he'd be better off on my favorite reality TV dating how, Sweet Home Alabama.

Nicki warned Ben that her parents might have some questions for him since before, when she got married, they didn't voice any of their concerns. And we all know how that ended! For this segment of the show, please drink when someone says "divorce". Not only had Nicki gotten divorced, but her parents were too.

After spending what seemed like 30 seconds with Ben, Nicki's mom told her "I'm so happy for you!" as her daughter gushed about being in love with a stranger, but her dad was a little more reserved. "I may have too readily given your hand in marriage the first time because I have such complete faith in your judgment. I think I could have maybe asked a few more questions... I'm sorry if I let you down." Oh. Genuine feelings. We see these so rarely on The Bachelor, I wasn't sure how to react. I think I was...sad? Yes, I definitely felt sad. I don't want Ben to pick Nicki, she's too good for this show!

At the end of the date, Nicki told Ben she's in love with him. Way to one-up Lindzi, Nicki! You're totally winning.

They Tried To Make Me Go To Rehab

Ben's final stop was in Arizona, where Courtney was waiting for him - and for the cameras, ready and prepped to do a little image rehab. "I feel disappointed in myself for treating the girls the way I did," Courtney murmured. Oh, you do not.

Ben joined Courtney, her parents and her sister for lunch, and they discussed him as though he wasn't there. "I dig him, I really feel like I'm falling for him," Courtney said. Er, he's sitting right next to you, and this is awkward.

During the whole visit, I couldn't get over how fake Courtney sounded around her whole family. She was putting on this demure little baby voice, and it was completely different than what we've seen all along.

Courtney's not stupid, and she knew to seal the deal she'd have to say those three magic words to Ben during the hometown date. But why say them privately (or as private as you can get with a bunch of cameras following you around) when you can plan a surprise fake wedding! AKA, the dumbest thing I've ever seen! I thought the pretend wedding was stupid when Ashley did it, and I think it's stupid now.

Back to La-La-Land

Completing the cross-country trip, Ben met back up with Chris Harrison in L.A. for the rose ceremony. They spoke a bit about how "tough" and "personal" this is, trying to gloss over the fact that Ben was about to reject a girl and her family.

It went down the way I knew it would go down. Courtney, followed by Lindzi, followed by Nicki. Sorry Kacie, no rose for you! Before these dates, I would have guessed that Ben would eliminate Nicki this week. But they had a really great hometown date, while Ben's date with Kacie just showed him that not only would he not fit in with her family, he didn't want to take her to California, away from her family, her life, and everything she knows. It was the right move, if there is such a thing on this show.

Kacie, of course, was crushed. "I knew that this was coming and I'm so upset. Why am I not good enough? Like, I don't get it... What the f--- happened?" Oh man. I can't be the only person hoping that this heartbreak doesn't cause an eating disorder relapse, right?

So, what did you guys think? Surprised? Not so surprised? Let me know in the comments, and I'll see you next week when Ben takes his remaining three girlfriends to Switzerland!

The Amazing Race: Comedy of Errors

2012-02-20T11:59:00.002-04:00

The Amazing Race has always been a show that gets more exciting as it goes along, so it was no surprise that last night's season premiere wasn't the best episode I've ever seen. There are a lot of teams to try and get to know and they all start off on even footing, so it's inherently not as thrilling as episodes later in the season can be. But I sure was glad to see that the show's 20th season didn't kick off with a non-elimination leg because the team that came in last? Yeah, those girls deserved to go home.

When the teams for this season of The Amazing Race were released, I wrote a post about the snap judgments I made. I was right in some situations, not in others. I expected to love "Bopper" and Mark, but instead I found them a little bit terrifying. Especially Mark, who screamed a lot. Dave and Cherie are, indeed, clowns and I can tell already that they won't be my favorites. And I knew I wouldn't be fans of Brendan and Rachel just from what little I've seen of Big Brother. (My boyfriend was opening a can of soup as Rachel was being introduced and suggested I pause the show because of the loud, high-pitched squeaking noise the can opener was making. "It's OK, it's basically the same as the sound of her voice," I said. And I'm not even kidding.)

99 100 ~~Red~~ Yellow and Red Balloons

The race began in Santa Barbara, California, as Phil told the eleven teams they'd have to search in the baskets of 100 mini hot air balloons for their first clue. The first six teams to find a clue and make it to the airport would get on the earliest flight to Santa Barbara, Argentina. The remaining five teams would be on a later flight, a couple hours behind.

It was a task that required more luck than skill, but since teams had to run up a hill to get to the balloons it provided a good indication of which teams will find the race more physically challenging than others. The clowns were not in great shape. Bopper puked in the car on the way to the airport - it was unclear if it was because he overexerted himself running around looking for the clue, or if he gets carsick sitting in the back seat. Either way, it'll be a long, vomit-y race for him!

I Wanna Jump To You

I really enjoyed the Road Block in this leg of the race, because it threw a lot of teams a curve ball. The clue asked who had a better sense of direction. One team member would enthusiastically declare "I do!", and when they opened the clue they discovered that meant the OTHER person would be jumping out of a plane, while the walking, talking compass would have to locate them after they'd landed. Awesome. I loved seeing how some people who'd offered to "do the Road Block" were disappointed they wouldn't get to jump out of a plane, while other people who thought they weren't performing the Road Block were devastated to realize they'd gotten stuck with the scarier task.

Jersey meathead J.J. wasn't thrilled to jump out of a plane since it "goes against all laws of nature" (physics? gravity?) and Stacy came the closest to not following through on the challenge.

Meanwhile, sisters Misa and Maiya made the first of their series of mistakes - while driving to the location where's she'd pick up her skydiving sister, Maiya got her car stuck in some sand. She managed to flag down a friendly driver who towed her out, but incident put the sisters in last place. It was clear it would come down to the sisters or the Jersey boys - Danny had only attempted to learn to drive a stick the day before he left for The Amazing Race, so he had trouble driving to pick up his partner, Joey "Fitness".

** Note to all reality TV hopefuls: If you're going on The Amazing Race, train by learning to drive a stick and working on running for long periods of time. If you're going on Survivor, train by learning to make a fire and overall strength and endurance. Otherwise, you're wasting everyone's time.

Empanada 120

The next task required the teams to make 120 empanadas - 60 cheese and 60 meat, and each type had its own technique for creating the crust. I was shocked - shocked! - that Rachel of Big Brother noticed this so quickly, but apparently she is rather smart even though literally everything about her suggests otherwise.

The first team to finish the task was Dave and Rachel, a married career army officer and project manager, and they raced off to the pit stop to grab that Express Pass from Phil. I don't think we've seen enough of this couple to know how much of a threat they are, but they did well this leg.

In second place were Brendan and Rachel, followed by Art and J.J., Nary and Jamie, Vanessa and Ralph and Elliot and Andrew. These were the teams that caught the earlier flight, so clearly there wasn't a lot of room to make up ground in this leg.

In seventh place were Kerri and Stacy, followed by David and Cherie and Bopper and Mark. So it came down to the Jersey Shore meatheads "Fitness" and Danny, or the California airheads Misa and Maiya.

Misa and Maiya finished making their empanadas before the guys, so they should have made it to the pit stop in tenth place, narrowly avoiding elimination. Should have. But they made a few crucial mistakes that cost them a spot in the second leg. (I won't say it cost them a million dollars, which is what the girls said in their post-elimination interview, because I don't think they had a chance in hell of making it all the way to the final leg.) First, the girls left their bags in the car while everyone else had brought them to the challenge. So instead of taking off straight for the pit stop, they had to go get their stuff. That was bad enough, but it got so much worse. The ladies still made it to the pit stop ahead of the guys, Phil Keoghan could SEE THEM, yet they couldn't see him. It was so weird. They went off to look somewhere else, and that was all the time Jersey Shore needed to finish their empanadas and make it to the pit stop, checking in in tenth place.

And on top of all that, Misa and Maiya tripped and fell over each other while looking for Phil in the wrong spot. It was like they were trying to look like complete fools! Their elimination was one of the silliest I've ever seen, because they were so close to the pit stop but too blinded by their own panic to see it.

All in all, I thought the first episode was decent but I'm more excited to see which teams rise to the top as we get a few legs in. I have my eye on the super-handsome twins. What did you guys think?

Allison Blogs SNL: Maya Rudolph

2012-02-20T11:54:00.003-04:00

Another week, another SNL! This week’s host is past cast member Miss Maya Rudolph. I really like Maya, I love when she sings and when she does an impression of Donatella Versace. Her career post SNL has been going fairly well. She starred in Bridesmaids (wasn’t the most memorable character but she made the friendship look real) and stars on NBC’s comedy Up All Night. I have watched a few episodes of the show and it’s cute but Maya’s character is a little unbalanced. Hopefully they show fixes that problem.

The big question before Maya hosts is: Will she address Whitney’s death? You may recall Maya did a hilarious impression of the late singer. I recall she did a Weekend Update segment just last fall. Will she do an impression? Will she even address the issue? Here we will find out.

Opening Sketch – Lin-sanity

Again, here comes my Achilles heel of reviewing comedy sketches based around sports. I’m never sure how much of the humour I am missing. Apparently the media is having a little too much fun with puns related to Lin’s name and the fact he is Asian. Anyway, this was a very funny sketch but it was cringe worthy. Let’s say if I was watching this with someone of Asian descent I would awkwardly ask, “What else is on TV?”

Monologue

Nope she didn’t address Whitney at all. Instead Maya tells the audience how being back at SNL reminds her of all the people she used to ‘funk’ with. And thus sings a ‘funky’ song. God this lady is talented just like her mother. (Look up her mom Minnie Riperton, you will be pleasantly surprised by what you find.) Anyway my favourite part was when all the male cast members showed up as her past partners, even Seth. And also apparently her and Stefan had a fling? You go girl.

Bronx Beat

It’s tradition when a former cast member hosts, other SNL alum show up. This time it’s Amy Poehler who helps out Maya by reprising their Bronx Beat sketch. These sketches are formulaic but funny. My favourite part is when Maya’s character describes how awful her husband is then finishes her rant in tears saying, “But I love that man!” Their guests were two guys who work on their show played by Andy Samberg and, Holy Sh*t, JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE! These two crew guys confess that they love the ladies and if they didn’t have their wives or girlfriends they would totally do them. And then the ladies make this face.

Yup! I would make the SAME FACE!

I Know why the caged bird laughs

This was hilarious! Maya Angelou (poet, National treasure, and Oprah spirit guide) gets her own prank show. I really recommend you watching it. I love how all those who get pranked just look at her and say, “It’s been an honour.” Even the descriptions of the pranks are described as poetic:

“Was this an act of malice?”

“No, it was an act of whimsy!”

Beyonce and Jay-Z’s Baby

Even though the prodigal child was born a few weeks ago, it was a great idea to explore this when Maya was hosting. (Or maybe this is just a comment on how NOT diverse the cast is.) This skit was a classic array of impressions. Who came to visit Beyonce and Jay-Z? Prince, LL Cool J, Nicki Minaj, Taylor Swift, Brad and Angelina, and finally Bon Iver played by, Holy Sh*t, Justin Timberlake!? Here are my highlights. I loved Maya’s description of giving birth to the baby and how her screams during pregnancy was her beautiful singing voice. Do you know who Bon Iver is? (“White butler loves him.”) You have to know his music to appreciate this hilarious impression that Justin does. Even though Justin is singing in a silly voice I still wonder, “When you are making another album?” Sadly for us Canadians, this clip isn’t available. Stupid copyright laws.

What’s Up with That?

I was wondering if they would ever bring this back. Something about this one seemed a little bit off. I usually enjoy seeing what role each cast member plays but I felt not everyone in the cast was in this sketch. Turns out it was only Kristen missing from the group. But why did it feel so empty? Anyway I did like Maya’s Sabrina, the salsa dancer who loves to “steal the spotlight!”

Weekend Update

Well if Amy is on the show it only makes sense for her to make an appearance with her old buddy Seth. They reprise their Really?! segment related to all this talk about women contraception issues. Now I don’t want to get into this debate, but seriously? Just a room full of men discussing women issues? Not a fan. And why are Weekend Updates so short lately? Don’t have a joke of the night. Sorry guys.

Showcase Girls

I loved this! It’s like watching two girlfriends having a good time. Kristen and Maya play two showcase models who have an accent that I can’t put my finger on. Is it Swedish? German? Not sure. This was the first time I have seen a sketch fall apart. Kristen was laughing, I mean her whole body would shake and she was holding back tears. Bill Hader also had a tough time keeping it together.

Halfway through the sketch I couldn’t tell what was written and what was an accent. I love watching the cast enjoy themselves so I give this sketch a pass.

The Obama Show

What if the Obamas had a sitcom? It would look a lot like the Cosby show. The good part of this sketch was all the nostalgia it brought and how spot on the opening credits were.

And Joe “Jamal” Biden with overalls? Priceless! The bad part of this sketch? The terrible, just terrible Cosby impression by Fred Armisen. Was he in pain or something? Shouldn’t Jay Pharaoh be doing Obama impressions by now? Also I enjoyed the re-creation of the Night and Day song and dance episode. This time Hilary Clinton (Amy Poehler) shows up to sing along. Sadly, this part of the sketch cannot be found online. Stupid copyright laws!

How’s He Doing?

This sketch wasn’t that funny and it was well deserved to be the last sketch of the night. It went on a little too long and I felt there was more room to play.

Overall Maya was an excellent host and there were some great sketches with special guests Amy and Holy Sh*t Justin Timberlake?! I still miss Paul Brittan though. There! I said it.

Next time the host will be Lindsay Lohan! Can you believe this? Will this be the beginning of a come back or the start of another train wreck. I’m leaning towards train wreck but I believe if she can make fun of herself she may get the public back on her side.

Thanks! @AlliTweeds

Sweet Home Alabama: Love Songs

2012-02-19T21:05:00.001-04:00

Sweet Home Alabama was two hours long on Friday night, and it needed to be - what a lot of drama! I've already heard from a bunch of readers who had a lot to say about Jeremiah, but I think we'd better start at the beginning.

The show picked up where we'd left off last week, with Jeremy and Landon arguing over what happened during the elimination. Most of the guys, including the country guys, weren't very happy with Landon. Bubba had the most reasonable opinion on everything, saying that he respected Landon wanting to protect Paige but there were clearly some ulterior motives there.

I don't think Paige was wrong in sending Jeremy home. She clearly has some trust issues surrounding people and their exes, and so she doesn't want a guy around who's going to be bragging about another girl or could possibly still have feelings for someone else. But I do think the only reason Landon told Paige about what Jeremy had said was because he could sense she was about to send him packing. It was to save his own butt, and that's a pretty rotten move.

Getting Corny

The first date of the week went to Donny, the singer/songwriter from Nashville who was married not so very long ago. He was married to Whitney of Survivor fame, who left him for Keith. From what we've seen on Sweet Home Alabama, I'd say Whitney traded down. Keith seemed like a dolt on Survivor (and he was mean to the nerd, Cochran) but Donny seems like a really nice guy.

Paige and Donny went to a bar and made kettle corn together, and then he sang a song he'd written about her. I don't know why I was surprised it was good. I mean, this is what the guy does for a living. But so does Dustin and, well, yeah...let's just say I prefer Donny.

The song definitely meant a lot to Paige - she had tears in her eyes - but since she didn't really kiss him afterwards, I wasn't sure if she was feeling a big connection. This was Donny's first date so he had a long way to go to catch up with some of the other guys who've had more time with Paige, and I wasn't sure the song would be enough.

Animal Lovers

The next date went to Jeremiah, who's the first guy to get a second date. First they spent the morning at a vet clinic, because Paige wanted to show him part of what she does for a living. It was really sweet, especially since on their first date Jeremiah showed Paige some of what he does, and you could tell they really bonded over their mutual love of animals.

Afterwards they went back to Dorgan's Inn where Paige stays, and hung out drinking lemonade and lying in the hammock. I knew Paige was really smitten with Jeremiah, but I don't think I realized how much - she told him she's falling in love with him, and Jeremiah didn't say anything back. It was so awkward, and we didn't get to see them together much after that.

On her Twitter account, Paige said that she'd asked Jeremiah a lot of really intense questions while they were in the hammock. He was obviously rattled, and it's hard to tell if that's just because he's nervous or what. If he weren't on a show, would he still be acting like this? Would he be more comfortable falling in love with Paige if they had just met through friends or something, or would he be freaking out just as much?

When Jeremiah returned from his date he was in a bad mood. It was hard to tell why. Was he frustrated that he didn't say more to Paige? Is it because he really likes her and hates seeing all the other guys still getting dates with her? Is it because things are moving too fast for him?

Work It Out

The next day, all the guys were scheduled to meet up with Paige at the gym and Jeremiah decided not to go. That's when he started to annoy me. I get that this is a hard situation, and I think Jeremiah is really out of his comfort zone. But if you like Paige, you should suck it up and spend whatever time you can with her. Not going on the group outing was a sulky, babyish thing to do.

**Ed. Note: Jeremiah tweeted that he didn't know Paige was going to be at the gym, and that it was a "bad time to just wanna take a nap." So I take back my comments about it being sulky!

I never thought I'd say Big Shaun was growing on me, but he cracked me up the entire time the guys were at the gym. He just hung out, bouncing on an exercise ball and telling jokes. I much prefer him to Landon, who bench pressed Paige. Landon actually said "You're my new dumbbell" to Paige. Oh gee, Mister, words every gal dreams of hearing! Barf. Maybe I'm weird, but I'm not impressed by that kind of thing.

While at the gym, Paige arranged to go on a "triangle date" with Dustin and Joey. The idea came from a joke Dustin made, but even a shared date with Paige is better than no date at all.

Back at the house that night, things got pretty bad with Jeremiah. A few people have commented on last week's blog post to say that they think producers and editors made Jeremiah look bad. I have to disagree - that was his behavior, and while editing does play some role in how people on the show are portrayed it doesn't change what Jeremiah did or said. I think Jeremiah knew he got out of control, lost his temper, and was embarrassed by his behavior. Apparently he'd had three glasses of whiskey, and that obviously was a factor.

The gist of it is that Jeremiah had a few drinks and stayed up late, mouthing off to a bunch of the guys and also letting them get under his skin. In particular, he was bickering a lot with Little Cowboy Shaun. Next thing you knew, Jeremiah was across the kitchen trying to hit Shaun and the other guys had to pull them apart.

Now, obviously I don't know Jeremiah and my opinions on this are just a girl who likes TV and writes a blog. So take it all with a grain of salt. (AKA, please don't send me hate mail!) I think Jeremiah is a good guy. I don't think he's a jerk. But I do think he was acting like one that night.

Jeremiah seems to be a pretty big introvert. And I get that, because I'm kind of an introvert too. I love being around people and I'm really social, but I NEED down time, I need alone time, I need to just chill and recharge or I get cranky. If you're an introvert, I think it would be really hard to live in a house with a bunch of guys. Guys who are also dating the girl you're currently really worked up about. Guys who are also having drinks and are trying to get under your skin a little, because that's what guys do. I think Jeremiah's probably not really cut out for a show like this, and so the whole situation is really difficult on him. But there's nothing he can do about it. He can't leave, not if he really likes Paige. So he just needs to suck it up and deal with it as best he can. But that night, he clearly lost it.

Thin Ice, Baby

For the "triangle date", Paige took Dustin and Joey skating. They each got to spend time alone with her, and the two dates couldn't have been more different. Dustin seems like a total sweetheart - just a really nice, genuine guy. But he and Paige were definitely in the friend zone. And Joey, that seems like a total physical connection. First of all, Joey on the ice was hilarious. I don't think his skates were tied up right, and he kept sliding around and falling like Bambi. How had he never skated before? He's from New Jersey! First he didn't know how to ride a bike, and now he'd never been on skates before? Where did this guy's childhood go?

One of the funniest parts of the whole episode was Bubba teaching Big Shaun how to rope a pretend bull. Has hell frozen over? Last week I was sure I didn't buy Shaun's whole changed attitude, but this week it actually seemed like it might be legit. Even Jeremiah took part in the roping lesson and cracked a few smiles, so I suppose his mood had improved.

I was sure Jeremiah would try to talk to Paige before the elimination so he could apologize for not going to the gym, but we didn't see the two of them talk at all. I still really like Jeremiah, so I hope this week was just a roadblock for them and not a game changer.

Boyd pulled Big Shaun aside first, and even though he acted as intimidating as possible, he was delivering the news that Paige wants a date with him. Good thing Boyd isn't in charge of these decisions, or I think Big Shaun would have been sent back to New York long ago. I'm interested to see how this date goes.

First Paige sent Dustin home, which wasn't much of a surprise since their date gave off a clear friend vibe. But I wasn't sure who the other guy would be. I thought it might be Landon since Paige was so close to eliminating him last week, or maybe Todd, who isn't making the greatest impression on me. Instead, she sent Donny home. I guess writing a girl a song doesn't work that well after all. Donny cried. A lot. Maybe he was still upset about his divorce? It seemed like he had a lot of emotions happening.

OK, that's it for this week, folks! What did y'all think of the mega-sized episode? I know you have opinions (especially on Jeremiah!) so get down to the comments section and share them!

Up All Night: Things not to say in the airport

2012-02-17T12:57:00.003-04:00

Up All Night was hilarious last night, thanks to Chris and Reagan's attempt to travel with their baby across the country for a wedding. Originally, they thought the five hour flight would be too much for little Amy. But stubbornness and the fear of becoming people they hate took over, and so they boarded the plan with the baby, a whole lot of luggage, and a plan that went awry from the moment they arrived.

The best part of the episode was that it really highlighted what's great about Chris and Reagan's relationship, and that's been what has made Up All Night special since the series premiered.Reagan took a tough, don't-ness-with-me approach to navigating the airport, while Chris tried to butter up employees by complimenting their manicures and - major mistake alert - joked about his wife's control issues. They had a slight tiff over how Reagan always has Chris's back, even when he's wrong, and then Chris made everything right by making a touching speech to everyone on the plane and offering to buy them beers. That's how you travel with a baby, folks - bring lots of money!

There were a lot of great Ava moments too, since she was officiating the wedding. She made poor Missy model a series of hilarious, inappropriate gowns for the big day, and then she had a fight with Kevin over marriage. They both said they never wanted to tie the knot, but of course Ava was lying. Ava's relationship with Kevin has helped humanize her character, and their promise to "never say never" felt really natural for them as a couple.

The wedding was also quite funny, with Alanis Morrisette guest starring as the other half of the hip-hop duo Ava was in back in the day. They had some lingering issues but managed to put them aside and perform a heavily bleeped version of their hit, "Back It Up (Beep Beep)".

All in all, I thought it was a hilarious episode. What did you guys think?