The new england SCBWI conference was  last weekend and I have not been able to write about it until now. It's normal for me to leave conferences feeling inspired and overwhelmed, but this time, it was different. I left feeling completely inspired and ready to jump back into work and totally overwhelmed by this awesome community.

You know when you first start going to conferences and you wonder what you're going to get out of it? You dream of agents loving your work and signing you on the spot  and editors sliding  you contracts under bathroom stalls . ( Hey, we writers and artists are dreamers after all and we like to dream big) The people who are conference pros  tell you not to stress about the agents and editors, make connections. Connections with your fellow writers and illustrators, these are the connections that matter. Well, folks, I am here to tell you that those people are 100% correct. 

This weekend was amazing because I truly felt like part of this community of kid-lit. And these ladies are why:

(The guy in the middle is Dan Yaccarino, he's pretty darn cool too) From the left we have Diandre Mae, Me, Dan, Kelly Light and Leeza. 

Here we are again with the funny, truly awesome Heidi Stemple with Nina swapped out for Leeza. 

I have met all of the ladies (except for Nina) at a conference and have continued the relationship online. (I got to know Nina on twitter then met her online at this conference) 

Your friends, even if they live in your computer most of the time, are one of the most helpful keys to your success. When you're at your house, toiling away on your craft day after day , it's an e-mail or facebook message or tweet from your friends that keep you going, keep you trying, keep you working towards the dream. 

(You notice how I'm not looking at the camera in the photos? That's because this was taken at the Eric Carle Museum and my head was constantly swiveling, trying to take in all of the amazing art and talented people. Yes, we did co-ordinate the polka dots. That's what happens when you realize you all own at least one form of polka-dotted clothing. )

The conference was also a great place for craft. From Kelly's fantastic character workshop that reminded me to take it to the back to the basics to Dan's, Martha Rago's and Kristen Sorra's advanced illustrator's academy, I was reminded that character is where it's at. I left the conference with tools, tips and steps to take my illustration to the next level. 

And, I met even more amazing people at the conference, I can't list them all, but here is a short sample for your clicking pleasure:

Jane Yolen, one word, squeeeeeee. So much talent and encouragement for us beginners.  

Harry Bliss, New Yorker cartoonist, author/illustrator, possessor of wickedly funny sense of humor. 

Sudipta, has written many, many books, she'll tell you how it is and look fabulous while doing it. 

Russ Cox, 3 time winner of poster contest, a truly nice guy

Greg Matusic, talented, funny and did I mention funny?

Hazel Mitchell, her tagline is crazy brit. that seems about right. 

Christina Rodriguez:  talented, helpful and funny as heck.

Casey Girard: illustrator co-ordinator for nescbwi 

So, in a nutshell. Go to scbwi conferences, soak up knowledge and always feel free to introduce yourself to the person sitting next to you. You'll be glad you did. 

6:00 am: Wake up with two small feet planted on forehead and another head wedged near spine. One head very sweetly and loudly asking where everyone is at the ungodly hour. Consider getting king size bed.

6:15 am: Gather enough strength to try and lead twins downstairs so that husband and daughter can sleep in a bit more. Mission almost accomplished down dark stairwell with much whispering until the bottom of the stairs are reached and twin #2 loudly proclaims that he wants to turn on the light first.Twin #1 disagrees, he wants to turn on the light. Race to light, barely beating the two year olds.

6:20 am: Twin #2 asks for a show. Tell him no show, it’s too early in the morning for t.v.

6:30 am: Daughter wakes up in horribly grouchy mood. Husband tries to get her back into bed and discovers she is running a fever. Realize that means to painting time today and no morning run. Be very disappointed and slightly glad.

6:35 am: Turn on a show. Tuck daughter back into bed with books, water and assurances that she will probably go to school tomorrow.

6:45-7:15 am: Check Facebook.

7:15-7:45: Feed Children, taking a tray to daughter upstairs.

7:50: Text babysitter to let her know not to come in today (think about those 4 missed hours of studio time painting in solitude and happiness.)

8:00 am: Check e-mail, ask agent if new book coming out by awesome, well-known writer is too similar to book about to sub.

8:30 am: Be very grateful when agent replies quickly and says it is not too similar.

8:30-9:00am: Respond to emails from editor discussing changes for latest rounds of paintings, keep an ear open to twins watching show.

9:00 am -10:30 Remember to fold laundry, put dishes in dishwasher, change diapers, get twins dressed, plan dinner, check on daughter,feed twins snacks.

10:30: realize you forgot morning cup of coffee.

10:35: Happy coffee and Pinterest time.

11:00 am: Turn around and realize why twins were so happily playing as playroom now resembles bombed building.

11-11:30 am: Lunch time. Take tray to daughter.

11:30:12:30 Set daughter up with iPad and Looney Tunes. Take boys out to back yard. Sketch character designs for upcoming submission and conference workshop while boys run around circles and throw balls into neighbors yard.

12:30: Come inside, change diapers, take away iPad from daughter, tell daughter to sleep, check e-mail, dream about sitting in studio and painting.

1:00-2:00 Sporadically read to boys while looking at approved paintings for latest books and planning color schemes for remaining spreads. Check twitter, bounce boys on knees, take silly photos on photo booth with boys and try to type around 4 grabbing hands.

2:00-2:30 Read about award winning illustrator’s gorgeous house studio, woods and child free life to think and dream about art all day. Get slightly jealous.

2:35: get over jealousy after being tackled by twins and checking on (much sweeter) daughter.

2:45: Happy coffee time

3:00 pm: Try to compose blog post about the joys of working from home and continue character sketches and work on dummy while twins play with blocks, train set, cars, throw books, throw balls, tackle each other, find important mail and strew it around living room.

3:15 pm: Give up and play with blocks and change diapers, get snack for boys. Check on daughter. Check email, site meter and Facebook on phone. Pick up toys, stack papers, Vacuum.

4:30 pm: Make dinner

5:15 pm: Eat as fast as you can, while arguing with at least one child who refuses to eat.

6:15-6:30 pm: Bathtime, Put away laundry and load up another basket to wash tomorrow.

7:30 Bedtime for children who require 12 hours of sleep.

8:00 pm: Wake up after falling asleep with children. Read book or watch tv with husband.

9:35 pm: Fall to bed exhausted.

10:00 pm: Wake up and discover that twins now have fever.

I can only guess that this sketch is a trickled down, filtered and silly response from my children’s illustrator brain reading “Game of Thrones”.

Because every new dress must pass the “twirl” test.

At the beginning of this year I was in a bad place, artistically. I had been searching for an art agent for about a year. I had received form rejections, nice rejections, encouraging rejections and no answer rejections. Then in late January I received an email that was so amazing, so awesome that I think the husband and I screamed and cheered so loudly the house shook. Flashlight Press wanted to publish a story I sent them a long time ago. And to make it even sweeter, I would be their first author/illustrator. (go here for the long version)

Finally, all of the hard work and determination had paid off. I decided it might be a good time to start looking for an agent. Not an art agent, but a lit agent because had I re-discovered my love of writing to complement my love of illustrating. So began the emotional roller coaster of rejections, full requests, encouragement, requests to revise and re-submit and to re-submit future works. I felt like I was closer than ever before but I was not there yet.

Along the way I made new contacts that turned into new friends who gave me honest feedback on my work and encouragement along the way. I wrote more stories, worked on my art and relished in the joy that is working on your first published book.

I felt like quitting many, many times and I did. But then, I decided to try again and that is why I can tell you this today.

I have an agent.

She is awesome. Her name is Joanna Volpe with Nancy Coffey Literary. My feature page is also up.

Hip, Hip, Hooray!!!!

Up, up and away!!!!

I am generally a cheery person. I love to laugh, smile and encourage the same in other people. But don’t let that peppy facade fool you. You see, I am an artist.

And as an artist, I have serious periods of self doubt, loathing and fear. My optimism and pessimism are often at battle. Especially when reviewing my professional development for 2011.

In one corner, my sunshine and roses,cool breezes side throws out things like, “I sold my first book!” “I regained faith in my artistic style!” “I caught the eye of some really awesome agents!”

The other side, my gloomy, dreary, dirty snow side mumbles, “I don’t have an agent yet.” “I have to do some serious work on my portfolio”, “I really thought my viking story was “the one”, “What am I going to do after January?”

But, in the middle of the dark battlefield, strewn with self doubt, and tattered lumps of ego, there are shiny bits and pieces. They are phrases and ideas, they are hope and new opportunities . They are irresistible. They are what will push me forward after I have finished with my paintings for “Maya was Grumpy” and attended the NY SCBWI conference and sent out revisions. They are what the pep uses uses to smash the self-doubt back into it’s deep, dark cave.

They are 31 Picture Book Ideas.

I am a PiBoIdMo guest blogger!(and participant) Check it out here :

http://bit.ly/sibmay

(designed by Bonnie Adamson)

Annabelle had to miss the annual boot stomping, line dancing showdown after she dared to wear stripes similar to Mrs. Lulu’s.

In the evening I’m painting a very grumpy little girl:

and during the day I’m polishing a viking for submissions.

I love being busy, so much so that I think I will be sad when the paintings for “Maya was Grumpy” are finished. Hopefully, I will have a new project to keep me occupied at that point.