In fact, I can’t caution you against it strongly enough. Instead of trying to make your own wedding dress, or your prom dress, just go to a site like DressFirst and pick out something nice, click the purchase button, and wait for the UPS man to show up with the package. It’ll save you a lot of heartache in the end.

The problem isn’t that you don’t have excellent tailoring skills, it’s that unless you’re a professional seamstress and/or dress designer, making fancy evening wear is a very specialized skill, one in which minor mistakes can quickly spiral out of control and turn into world-class disasters. And because the typical fabric used in constructing homecoming dresses and prom dresses and bridesmaid dress is so expensive, a simple slip of the scissors or the sewing machine can cost you a bundle.

When you move into formal wear, you’re moving into very dangerous territory. The jungles of Africa have nothing on it.

If, however, you choose to ignore my warnings and do want to start making evening wear, use yourself as the guinea pig first. Wear your own clothes until you get good enough to make things for others. The last thing you want is to promise to make someone a prom dress (for example) only to find that you’re not able to complete the dress in time for the big event, or that your skill set wasn’t up to the task of producing something that’s supposed to be elegant and well-finished.

So, to recap. Want to make evening wear? Don’t do it.

If you’ve ever demonstrated your craft in public, you know that it’s a far more perilous activity than most would suspect. In addition to the danger of losing your voice through constant talking, there’s the danger of losing materials to grubby hands or sticky fingers, and of course your mind when you spend most of the day answering the same three questions over and over and over and over and over again.

Then there are the crafts that leave us more open than others to minor injuries that require swift attention, though not grievous enough to warrant a trip to the ER, hunger pangs when things are just too busy for you to take a break, sunburn if you’re out of doors and nasty drafts if you’re inside… the list goes on.

But a few simple items packed in advance and used as necessary can help you make it through your weaving art demo safely and with a minimum of injury to you and to the public.

Food and water. Seriously. At least pack a couple energy bars and a bottle or thermos of water. Chances are that at some point you will be desperately hungry or thirsty and unable to leave your post. It doesn’t matter whether it’s because the person who was supposed to spell you never showed up, your breakfast was inadequate, there was a sudden rush of inquiring minds just as you were about to close down for lunch, or you didn’t think about eating until you looked up and realized it was four thirty in the afternoon and you’d been sitting there weaving since nine am. All of that can be sorted out and groused about later. Right now you need to take care of your body’s needs, and it needs fuel. Also, having a drink handy means that when you start feeling dry and your break is two hours away, you should be able to keep talking.

Throat lozenges. If you start getting a frog in your throat:

you’ll want a way to ease the misery and keep talking. If you know a professional singer or someone who does a lot of public speaking, ask them what they use.

Band aids, allergy medication, pain killers, hankies or Kleenex, etc. Look, you never know. Prepare for life’s little emergencies… like when you suddenly find you’ve gotten that special monthly visitor a week early in the middle of a demo, or someone’s perfume sets you off on a sneezing fit. These things do happen. Sometimes they happen all at once.

Sunscreen and/or a hat with a brim. If you’re working out of doors, these are necessary. And being of the Transparent Peoples who have just two skin shades (lily white and lobster red!) I learned this one very, very quickly. If, on the other hand, you’re working in a drafty historical building, bring a sweater, shawl, or other quick add on to keep you warm. I’ve had that come in handy in the spring as well as the winter.

Tags to identify the things on your table… especially the ones that could develop legs. These tags perform two duties: they allow some of the more observant observers to understand what the equipment is so that you can answer a couple less basic questions as the day progresses, and they tell anyone who might find your items shiny that you know what you have and where it is. Mind you, I’ve never actually had anything go missing from my demo space. Most people are pretty honest, I always had a partner, and anything of value was in a case that couldn’t go into a pocket easily. But fairs and celebrations bring crowds which raises the chances that some of those people are less than honest, and I’ve known a couple of crafters to lose an item or two from their displays. I don’t assume the worst of people, but I don’t see any reason to make it easy for them to disappoint me, either.

Your sense of humor. This is probably the single most important thing you can pack. As fun and exciting as it is to demonstrate your craft, the fact is that it can also be exhausting and sometimes frustrating. The less common your craft, the more misconceptions people have about it… and the more firmly they seem to hold those misconceptions. Even in a really great crowd, chances are one bozo will come along and say or do something that leaves you with your chin on the floor (or in the dirt!) for hours. When that happens, the best thing you can do is find a way to laugh about it.

It’s a heck of a lot less painful than banging your head against a wall.

It is with a heavy heart that I have a sad announcement to make: the Maonolosphere is shutting down, and that means this is my very last post to you here on Crafty Manolo.

I still can’t quite make myself believe it, but it’s true.

This blog is very close to my heart. I love handcrafts, and I love writing, so writing about crafting has been an absolute delight for me.

But all things must end eventually, and that includes the superfantastic ones.

I will miss you all more than I can possibly say.

Still, while this is a blow, it’s not the end for me. I’ve decided to take this as the kick in the pants I needed to move onward and upward with my writing. I intend to put together a book proposal, roll the dice, and see what happens.

So stay crafty, my friends. May all your future sock monkeys be happy ones.

There are a lot of worthy causes in the world. Most of them would like some money, too. But if you’re looking for a cause that’s not too big and where you can see real good done for specific people, you could do worse than take a look at Regretsy today.

You see, today they’re kicking off their second annual Secret Santa.

That’s right! Those heartless mockers of the worst of Etsy are opening their creaking chest cavities to give Christmas presents to children in need. If you know a child who isn’t going to have much in the way of a Christmas this year, you have until the seventh to nominate them. If you just want to help out, go throw some money at the problem. The goal is to help two hundred kids get some unexpected holiday magic thrown their way. Each child will receive one individually chosen present. Where possible, it will be just what they want most. Where not possible, it will at least be tailored to their specific tastes.

Oh, and since PayPal were such Grinches last year, all funds will be handled through Regretsy’s WePay store.

The craft community is good at sharing joy. Let’s all do our parts.

Oh, and if you know of a craft-related charity/program you’d like to see supported, feel free to let us all know about it in comments.

I love it when someone comes up with a way to use an ancient technique for a new purpose. In a lot of ways, I guess this naalbinding iPhone case isn’t that new a concept. After all, naalbinding has been used to make bags to carry various things for thousands of years. But the iPhone is a relatively modern thing, and the bag is a simple project the beginning naalbinder can accomplish quickly.

To find out how, just go to this page of instructions on All Fiber Arts, get your iPhone ready, and have fun.

PRAS returned this week after ducking out on Thanksgiving night… which was probably a good idea. Some of what I saw last night would not have sat well after a full meal of turkey and salad and mashed potatoes and gravy and pumpkin pie.

Anyway. Last time on Project Runway All Stars: Designers are inspired by photos sent in by fans. Laura does her best low-rent Marie Antoinette impression while Joshua feels her pain. Anthony Ryan wins with a dress where I can see the inspiration, but am not wild about the results and Andrae is finally given a mercy killing for his painfully bad zip up panel skirt and matching tube top.

What happened this time? Read on to find out!

We start on the catwalk where Carolyn Murphy comes out in a rather fabulous shawl collared vest and white pants to introduce the next challenge. It seems this week is all about androgyny… and avant garde design. Yes, the remaining designers must design and create an androgynous look for their models. They have a budget of $150 and one day to do the work.

Simple enough, right?

Of course the first words out of Laura’s mouth are ‘Oh, no, no.’ After all, she’s a super feminine designer, so she can’t do androgyny. You know, I think the designer this season with the most feminine aesthetic is Uli, and she’s smiling, albeit a bit nervously. Joshua, on the other hand, is really excited about this one. In fact, he interviews that androgyny ‘is totally fun.’ Bless his little metrosexual heart.

In the workroom, the designers sketch. Kayne is thinking of androgynous stars, like Adam Lambert, Lady Gaga, and David Bowie. That’s actually a really good place to start… but we’ll see where he finishes up. He’s decided that a houndstooth jacket with strong shoulders and a huge ruffled collar is what it’s all about. Because nobody uses houndstooth in women’s wear, I guess.

Laura has decided to do an oversized jacket and leggings with lots of angular cut outs down the legs. The sleeves on the jacket look like they will have either a lot of purely decorative buttons, or possibly large pom poms down them. I don’t get it.

Casanova is doing leather with lots of cut outs. His sketch more or less looks like a grown up romper with some cut outs. I don’t see a lot that’s masculine about it.

I can see the man in Emilio’s sketch. Unfortunately, that man is Emmet Kelly in his work clothes.

I hope the finished product looks better.

And we’re off to MOOD. Say hi to Swatch for me!

Kayne grabs some yellow fabric that looks like a highlighter pen to contrast with his houndstooth. Yes, that will be a contrast. Also in common with a highlighter pen, it’s completely sheer. Kayne is nervous about his decision to make a fitted jacket.

Uli is feeling a little out of her depth making something with a more masculine air than she’s used to. Still, she’s excited to find a black and silver trim that seems to be made of safety pins. I’m kind of loving it, and I know Uli has the taste level to use something like that effectively, so I’m not terribly worried about her.

At the counter, it looks like some designers have overspent their budgets. Laura asks if she can keep both pairs of shoulder pads if she gives up a zipper. Something about that makes me kind of laugh.

Back in the workroom, everyone gets down to work right away. I’m loving the berry-colored pinstripe fabric Emilio has chosen. He’s talking about making ‘circular fins’ that go around the body. Suddenly, I find myself a lot more intrigued than I was by his sketch.

Just as Uli is fitting a kind of gorgeous little sparkly jacket on her mannequin, the door opens and… this is not Joanna Coles doing her rounds, nor is it the models coming in for a fitting. It’s Georgina Chapman come to throw a great big curve ball at the designers!

The twist, Georgina tells us, involves the models. And here they are. With that, the door opens again and nine male models come into the room. All the designers freak out just a little. Okay, some freak out a lot. Laura is patting herself on the back for her huge seam allowances, but Emilio declares himself ‘completely screwed.’

But wait! That’s not the whole twist. Georgina assures the designer that their work thus far has not been for naught. They are still using their lady models. It’s just now they have to make a second, complimentary look for the guy models to wear. For this, they get another $150 and another day to work. Right now they get thirty minutes to measure up their new models before the usual ones arrive for a fitting.

Designers get to work with their measuring tapes and more. In fact Kayne asks his model about his sexual preferences and is pleased to learn he’s straight. Kayne, as it turns out, has two unmarried sisters and he wants to hook up his model with one of them. When Poison Ivy measures her model’s inseam, they joke together that now they’re very intimate friends.

Emilio now feels more comfortable, because he’s realized a good tailored piece works on either a male or a female form, and if he just tweaks the measurements and a couple details, he’s already got his design set. Anthony Ryan was already trying to make an androgynous evening dress for his female model, but he quickly realizes it will fit his male model and by being a dress be both androgynous and avant garde in one fell swoop. He’s one happy camper. Althea tries her women’s coat on her male model. I’m not feeling this look for either sex. Still, I do have to say that sort of raisin colored leather is a good color on him.

Casanova has decided both sexes will wear pants and both will have his cut outs which have morphed into scorpions. The whole thing is taking on a tribute to the Zodiac aspect that I’m not feeling at all. Kayne discovers the jacket he made for his female model fits his male model pretty much perfectly. He’s happy. I think it looks like his model just raided his sister’s closet, because it’s really a pretty girly piece. I don’t know how he was hoping to express androgyny with it on a woman. Women wear tailored jackets all the time. And oversized houndstooth? Is something I don’t believe I’ve ever seen on a man before.

Joshua tells his model and Anthony Ryan that what he really wants to make is a skirt and ‘assless chaps.’ When Anthony Ryan says this could lead to an arrest, Joshua assures him there will be pants underneath the chaps. Just as Anthony Ryan takes a breath and starts to say that would be okay, Joshua drops the bombshell that the pants will be in a contrasting color. Anthony Ryan says some things in the room are already looking costumy. Joshua asks does he think this would be costumy. “No. That’s just vulgar.” Extra points to Anthony Ryan for le mot juste!

Unfortunately, Uli has decided that having the male outfit to do not only snatches the prize from her, but means it’s time to pack. Don’t do this to me, Uli! Don’t you dare give up! You are one of my few shining rays of hope in a season of meh. I have already pegged you, Emilio, and Anthony Ryan as the final three with any one of you ready and able to take the prize. I’m praying that when I get to the end of a season of Laura and Poison Ivy and the utter, utter tastelessness of Joshua and Kayne, that I will get to see your amazingly gorgeous line float down the runway in the finale. So Uli, honey, haul your cranium out of your posterior and get cracking!

As the female models arrive for their fitting, I realize in horror that Joshua is making a jacket with fur sleeves. We’re talking about the boy skinning Cookie Monster, here. That is not cool.

After all the models are gone, Kayne repairs to the sewing room where he’s… sewing black bits on his highlighter mesh material. I don’t get it. Is he doing the world’s least subtle nipple coverage? Oh. My. Random Deity of choice! That’s precisely what he’s done! Kayne, you are making me sadder than Joshua’s Cookie Monster sleeves and Uli’s giving up moment combined. Have you learned nothing about taste since season three?

Apparently not.

The evening is over, and the designers head back to their hotel. Here’s hoping a few fevers break in the night.

In the morning, the designers head back to MOOD with their cash and their sketches to get materials to make their second looks. Emilio is in a little bit of a panic because there is no more of the fabric he based his designs around. Eventually, though, he finds a solid piece in the same berry color and decides that’s the best he can do. I think this might actually work for him having his female model in pinstripe and his male model in a solid fabric but in a color that is not generally considered very masculine.

Workroom. There are now male mannequins in the room. Uli has decided to give her female model’s pants to her male model so she has to figure out what’s on the bottom of the female look now.

Anthony Ryan has decided to give his sheer, black evening women’s wear look based on a man’s button down shirt to his male model. To see how it’s going to work, he puts it on Joshua. Joshua not only says he would absolutely wear this, but jokes briefly that it’s what he wore to the workroom today so he’s not giving it back. Since Joshua is probably the single most androgynous thing in the room, Anthony Ryan decides that’s a good sign and goes forth with confidence.

Actually, Joshua looks pretty darn good in it. He tells Anthony Ryan that he’s placing an order.

Laura is still unhappy with the challenge. She tells Joshua from across the room that her idea of a well-dressed man is one wearing a suit and tie. Still she interviews that she hopes to win the challenge. From what I’m seeing in her workstation, I think praying not to go home is as much as she should go for.

Joanna Coles arrives like a breath of fresh air to see what everyone is up to. She reminds everyone that the judges were seriously underwhelmed by the pieces shown in the last challenge.

She starts the critique with Uli. Joanna is delighted with the trims Uli picked and how she has used them. When Joanna picks up the pants and asks if these are for the male model, Uli tells her he almost fits them, but there isn’t much ‘ball room.’ Joanna says she’s never heard that expression before ‘but I quite like it.’ At the next table, Anthony Ryan is cracking up.

And on to Anthony Ryan. Joanna is pleased with his fabric choices. He asks Joanna’s opinion as to whether he should use the bright acid yellow fabric he got at MOOD for the pants on the male look. Joanna is concerned that with the black dress/top which has a strong horizontal motif it might begin to look like a wasp. Enough said. Anthony Ryan ditches the yellow.

Joanna sees ‘a bit of Eyes Wide Shut’ in Althea’s matching purple coats with the draped necklines. Althea is delighted until Joanna adds that these look like uniforms for a cult. Althea, here’s a hint: when people reference Eyes Wide Shut? It’s rarely a compliment. Kayne interviews that the coats look like they came from Star Wars and Chewbacca wants his coat back. If he really knew his Star Wars, he would know that Wookies don’t wear coats. On the other hand, I could totally see Luke Skywalker in one of these. If he’d just joined a strange cult.

Joshua explains to Joanna that he plans to shave down his Cookie Monster fur ‘to look like a pony.’ Oh dear.

Ivy has once again made a simple unfitted jacket over a pair of sheer pants over spanky pants. On the male mannequin, there reside only his spanky pants. Seriously, when are the judges going to latch on to the fact that she only seems to know how to make one set of garments in different colors with variations on the length of the jacket? Joanna does, however breathe a great big sigh of relief when she hears something is going over those spanky pants. I’m still waiting for the tongue lashing over making the same damn outfit yet again.

Emilio gets the good news that at first glance, Joanna couldn’t tell whether the outfit he was working on was the male or the female one. I think the breasts on the mannequin are a bit of a dead giveaway, but I get her point. It really is a great melding of traditionally male and female design elements. It’s looking more avant garde and less Emmet Kelly with every passing minute. Joanna is pleased to hear that the male version is nearly the same outfit.

Joanna asks Casanova what man is going to wear gold leather. He shows her the biker pants detailing for the male model. She’s somewhat encouraged by that. I’m not sure I am. I still don’t see any masculine elements on the female design, which means it ain’t very androgynous.

Apparently Laura’s definition of androgynous is feminine. Okay, then. She shows Joanna her sheer chiffon shirt for a man with nothing worn underneath because that’s what women wear. Joanna’s narrowed eyes speak volumes to me in this moment. There is a tuxedoesque jacket on what I believe is the female mannequin and Joanna points out some unevenness in the lapels that the judges are going to jump on ‘like a crow on a carcass.’

Kayne feels the leather flowers with the yellow centers and yellow veining on the leaves that he has wrought will bring more androgyny to the look. Maybe on the guy. On a girl, flowers are just kind of expected. GAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! The highlighter mesh shirt that he was making nipple guards on? Yeah, those weren’t just nipple guards. He’s sewn an entire smiley face to that blouse! Joanna says it’s either going to be hideous ‘or… possibly… fabulous.’ Kayne is horrified to hear that same phrase two weeks in a row. I think he needs to listen to the delivery more carefully, because Joanna didn’t sound one bit convinced of the possibility of fabulousness. Kayne, Tim Gunn  would have looked at that smiley face and jumped back three feet, and then probably asked a priest to come do an exorcism on your mannequin.

As a parting shot, Joanna reminds the designers this is an avant garde challenge, and to push themselves further than they think they can go.

On the upside, Kayne seems to have gotten the message that his smiley face will get him canned and he removes it.

As Casanova tries on his men’s pants, Emilio teases him that there doesn’t seem to be much ball room in them. Then he jokes that he hates Casanova for making them so quickly. It does feel very good natured.

When the models arrive for a fitting, Casanova is panicked to discover that his women’s pants are too small for his model. And Ivy swoops in to tell him where he got his pattern wrong and show him how to fix it. She tells him it’s easy.

And then the guys arrive for their fitting.

Yes, Ivy has made completely sheer pants for her guy to wear over those spanky pants. No imagination, and no taste is a lousy combination for a fashion designer. At least I can see the imagination when Kayne straps his male model into platform sandals. Of course, if he doesn’t want his look to wind up reminding the judges of Rocky Horror, I suggest he not use them in the actual runway. Then again, even Joshua is counseling against it. “I love… more. This? Is too much.”

Designers sew feverishly. At last it’s time to return to the hotel and rest up for the big show.

Morning. Workroom. Panicky designers race to finish their work. Joshua interviews that in this time he needs to “… become Helen Keller in Miracle Worker.” Actually, Joshua, the miracle worker in The Miracle Worker is Annie Sullivan, who does, indeed make amazing breakthroughs in a surprisingly limited time frame. The miracle worked is Helen Keller beginning to learn to communicate despite her lack of sight and hearing in a time when it was considered a no-brainer that people with such handicaps are somehow, well, no brained.

But the question of why people keep forgetting that Annie Sullivan is a character in a story about Annie Sullivan is a rant for another day.

As Ivy sews away at Casanova’s design, Laura intersnots that as All Stars everyone should do their own work and not get help from others. The thing is, this has never been against the rules, ever. In fact, people have won challenges because another designer stepped in to help out. This has been the case through the entire history of Project Runway. Now, do I think Ivy and Casanova take it to new levels? Pretty much. Do I think Ivy would help another person in that room other than Casanova? No, I do not. Do I think Casanova would help anyone other than Ivy? Yeah, actually, I could see him doing that. I think he’s a helpful bunny at heart. But the fact remains that nobody is breaking any rules here. Anthony Ryan also feels they should stop working together so much because ‘You can’t both win.’ I do agree, it’s a valid point. But then again, it’s their downfall.

Models arrive, last minute adjustments are made. Hair and make up are done. Ivy wants her models made up to look like ‘Kabuki masks.’ Seriously? Kabuki is make up. Noh is the masks. Noh is minimalist. Kabuki is exuberant and extravagant. They are opposites. Her models wind up looking like half Noh masks and about ten per cent Kabuki. I guess it’s a vaguely almost Japaneseish look. But Kabuki masks? Do. Not. Exist.

Speaking of bad styling choices, Kayne wants white paper eyebrows on his models for a ‘David Bowie meets Adam Lambert’ look. Honey, I don’t think even Adam Lambert would be caught dead in those eyebrows, and Bowie is right out. In point of fact, they wind up looking like little moth wings sprouting from the models’ real eyebrows. It’s just bad. Smiley face bad.

With ten minutes to go, Joshua decides to add a Cookie Monster clutch to his male look. I like the idea of giving his guy a clutch bag, since it’s such a quintessentially female fashion accessory, but this Cookie Monster fur is making my heart sink.

Kayne is feeling ‘totally safe’ when he looks at Ivy’s, Althea’s, and Laura’s looks. While I intensely dislike all three, I don’t feel any of them will necessarily let Kayne off the hook. Emilio praises the workmanship of Casanova’s looks, but correctly notes that there is no hint of androgyny in them. Joshua feels certain he’ll be up for the win this time because he believes himself to have evolved as a designer more than most people in the room.

And they’re off!

There are two guest judges this week. The first is First Lady Michelle Obama’s fave designer Jason Wu. The second is Robert Rodriguez, who has dressed Angelina Jolie and Nichole Kidman. Best of luck, designers. You may need it.

We start the show with Joshua’s looks. She’s wearing a white blouse with a massive button down collar, a tucked houndstooth check bib down the front, and Cookie Monster sleeves over a pair of skinny white Bermuda Shorts. The collar is buttoned down with black straps with buckles. The back is open with some very sloppy corset lacing that doesn’t actually shape the body at all. Oh, and the shorts have houndstooth racing stripes.He’s wearing a black horizontal striped mesh shirt under a cropped organza black jacket with skinny sleeves and a truncated shawl collar. They’re worn over full white pants with tucks down the front. He carries a Cookie Monster clutch. In the back, the jacket is suddenly full length. Everything has been sewn well, but I don’t get any androgyny from the woman’s look at all, and I don’t see a lot of either interesting design or practical use. Joshua sees top three in this. I see – considering some of the designs I’ve seen in the workroom – mere safety.

Uli is up next, and I think she’s done a better job of avant garde, though I still feel more androgyny in the male design than the female one. She is wearing black leggings that fall over the top of the foot. Over that is a black chiffon blouse with a fall down the front of the safety pin trim banded on either side with black feathers. Over this is a cropped jacket in a pinkish-silver metallic brocade with strong shoulders, elbow length sleeves that fall to a point at the back of the elbow, and a funky curved piece that hints vaguely at breasts and then swoops down to a point in the back. The back of the blouse falls to the knees. He’s wearing a black chiffon hip length sleeveless blouse topped with a rather glorious sleeveless feather bolero and skinny pants in the brocade. She’s added a matte black pendant with a couple jet-colored beads that hit him just at the jewel collar of the blouse. Uli’s definitely safe, and could be a hit with the judges.

Then comes Althea’s matching purple cult coats. I think she started with the idea of a trench coat in a combination of wool and leather. The sleeves are long and pointed upwards at the shoulders almost as though they had wings that were clipped. The the leather goes to the elbow where it flaps sadly over the wool. The collar is the size of Cincinnati and loops around the neck to dive down to the hip. There’s a self leather belt. In the back, the collar looks like a proto-hoodie that never quite made up its mind. The whole sorry mess is worn over matching wool trousers and a fuchsia wool scarf. The male version really only differs in that the coat is worn unbelted and cuts off at the hips and the fuchsia underneath becomes an entire mid-thigh-length sweater.  I think an alien race on Star Trek the Next Generation wore these and tried to kill Captain Picard. Still, while they’re horrid, I do have to admit they look well made.

Oh, Laura, I can’t even think these are all that well made. She wears skinny black pants with square cut outs running from just below hip level to the painful open flaps over the feet. This is topped with a black cropped tube top and a silver and black tuxedo jacket with ugly black patch pockets and black sleeves that fall open from the wrist with purely decorative silver buttons starting at the elbow and finishing with the sleeves just at the point where they will thwack her knuckles with every step. He’s wearing grey skinny pants and a sheer grey sleeveless blouse with black buttons and sloppily done black binding at the collar and armholes. The black binding is also used on the two square cut outs on either side of his torso. The cut outs give the impression that they’re collapsing. The overall impression is half poor workmanship, half random half-baked ideas hurled at a pair of people using what stuck to them like soggy tissue. At this point, I begin to wonder if Kayne might be safe after all. Say what you will about his taste level (and I do!), the boy can sew. These designs of Laura’s? Are all wonky seams and uneven details.

Of course Emilio’s work only looks that much stronger coming after that fiasco. This is what avant garde and what androgyny looks like! Both models wear pin striped berry colored vests with the circular fins and pale mauve ascots. The woman’s fin starts at the left hip and has disappeared before it winds around to her right shoulder. The man’s starts at the right hip, becomes an extravagant lapel that morphs into a stand up collar and wends its way down to the left hip. The beautifully tailored classic trousers are the back of the pinstripe on her, and the muted berry he found in the second MOOD trip on him. He wears a tiny black pork pie hat down low over his right eye. She wears her matching berry pork pie over her left eye. They both have a shiny look that reminds me of Teal’c in the early seasons of Stargate: SG-1, and they walk together with a matching almost sliding step. This is showmanship combined with impeccable workmanship. When the models turn to walk back, you can see that both backs are bare, and the fins are lined in black.

At this point, I’m ready to declare a winner without even seeing the rest of the garments.

And after that magnificent showing, Kayne’s looks even worse. Even the horrible moth wing eyebrows cannot distract from this train wreck. She wears a fitted jacket in oversized black houndstooth with a gigantic black ruffled collar, and two anemic little leather flowers. This is worn over a mock turtle halter top of highlighter yellow mesh and a pair of what look to be latex leggings. In the back there’s a beautifully cut jacket skirt. In fact, all of it is so beautifully made that it hurts all the more that this much ability went into this much crappiness. As for him, well, the most androgynous thing about his smoking jacket and shorts worn with no shirt is the fact that they’re the same oversized houndstooth. Even his leather flower is worn like the traditionally masculine suit pocket hanky. There is no androgyny on either side to speak of, and both are lousy designs. But impeccably made. And horribly styled.

At least Laura gets that she doesn’t get androgyny. Kayne is convinced this is going to put him up for the win. I bleed for him, because I can see the handwriting on this wall. He’ll be incredibly lucky if he can avoid elimination on this one.

Of course he is getting some help not only from Laura and Althea, but also from Casanova. His designs have no clue what an androgynous is. She’s wearing a gold leather top and knee pants more than liberally festooned in scorpion cut outs. Actually, the whole outfit is reminding me strongly of craft fair booth clothes with cut outs. You know the ones that look like tablecloths? Yeah, like that, only in gold leather with a motif that most people don’t find terribly appetizing. The shirt has a mandarin collar, no sleeves, and stops just short of the hips with a scalloped dip in front and in back. The extremely tight pants also have the scorpion tablecloth cut outs and then are cut in huge circles above the knee and end with triple buckled straps just below the knees. His outfit is skinny gold leather pants with the ‘motorcycle’ detail around the knees and just one scorpion on the left thigh. On top he wears a white chiffon blouse with elbow sleeves and a yoke of the gold leather with scorpion cut outs. Despite the feminine fabrics, the outfit looks nothing but masculine in intention and detail.

Casanova’s best bud Ivy has managed to push the limits in one way: I believe she has created the very first spanky bodysuit. She is wearing the Ivy jacket in black chiffon over an entirely sheer jumpsuit in steel grey organza. Hey! It isn’t palazzo pants! The pants are skinny and tucked into a pair of seriously ugly ankle boots. And then there’s the spanky suit underneath and the cummerbund belt. Ho freaking hum. He wears the same outfit in all black with no shirt and just spanky pants. In other words, Ivy has done what Ivy does. There’s no surprise, there’s no innovation, and there’s no real thought put into the specifics of the challenge. If the judges don’t notice this soon, I’m going to cry.

Anthony Ryan re-raises the bar nicely with his designs. She is wearing a pale grey button down oversized organza shirt with strategically placed horizontal stripes of a less sheer metallic material in the same grey. This is worn with a pair of full legged but beautifully cut shorts in a black and grey almost tie-dye effect print that also echoes in my mind Christopher’s x-ray print from season ten. She wears these over black tights and a pair of chunky-heeled ankle boots. In a slightly less sheer iteration, I would absolutely wear that outfit down the street. In fact, I did wear some very similar looks twenty years ago. He’s wearing the sheer black sleeveless button down shirtdress that hits the knees in front and the heels in back. Again, it’s sheer with horizontal metallic stripes. It’s worn over a pair of skinny pants in the same print as her shorts. Having see what’s come down this runway, I can pretty much assume this is top three material, but I think it still would be a serious contender even if we had seen more strong work on the runway.

Althea, Ivy, and Joshua are immediately declared safe. The race for the bottom was so hard and so determined that I can kind of see how Althea and Ivy lucked out here. And while Joshua’s was definitely in a better class (and really, it’s sad that I think that), it has no place in the top three.

That top three? Consists of Emilio, Anthony Ryan, and Uli. To me, this is a cake walk. Don’t get me wrong, I love Anthony Ryan and Uli like things I seriously love, but Emilio hit this one out of the park.

The bottom three? Are Casanova, Kayne, and Laura. In my not so humble opinion, Ivy should have taken Casanova’s place, not because his was so much better than hers, but because hers is the exact same design she has been making since the competition began. Whatever his inability to conceive of androgyny, Casanova’s work was original. Not good, mind you, but original. He has not made these pieces every week since the competition began. He did something new. Awful, but new. Ivy did the same old, same old, which also happens to be awful.

Backstage, Joshua decides to have a whine and cheese fest for himself bemoaning the fact that he’s still not been on top this season. Ivy tells him not to drag his ego into it. Joshua snaps back that Ivy has shown the same outfit in every challenge so far. She smugly says that the judges seem to like it. Wow. Joshua tells her the judges will start noticing it soon. And Ivy goes back to don’t get egos involved. After all, she’s just here to show her best work. Joshua channels me when he tells her in that case, she should already have gone home.

Mind you, I’m not so much defending Joshua’s behavior here. I believe he’s acting from a place of profound petulance and just striking out at a handy target. All the same, he’s got a point. If you’re not going to bring your A game and really stretch yourself to meet the challenges, why bother to show up? These are awfully high stakes to just shrug and say ‘the judges haven’t tossed me out on my butt yet, so I can keep right on doing exactly the same thing.’ If I was there and trying as hard as Joshua is, I, too, would resent the hell out of Ivy.

So the best and worst are further examined by the judges, questions asked and answers mulled. It comes down to the final question, and here’s the answer.

The winner is…

Emilio!

Yeah, I wasn’t surprised at all. That was what androgyny looks like, that was what avant garde looks like, that was what showmanship looks like, and that was what thoughtful styling looks like. Seriously, watching his models walk that runway was one of the best moments in Project Runway All Stars history.

As for the bottom, well, farewell…

Kayne.

I’m sorry, Kayne. If it were up to me, it would have been Laura’s time to go. Not only did she have no more clue about androgyny than you do, her clothes were seriously badly made, didn’t really go together, and showed every bit as little creativity as yours this week. I further admit that I’d rather have you on my TV screen than her, but that did not enter into my thought process… much. It didn’t make the aired parts of the deliberation, but I wonder if those moth eyebrows were your undoing in the end.

At least you didn’t go down for a smiley face.

As Kayne and Laura head backstage and Laura announces she’s in, a couple of people clap half-heartedly. When Kayne gives a graceful farewell speech, everyone surges around to hug him goodbye.

I leave it to all of you to interpret that as you will.

Next time on Project Runway All Stars: Sustainable materials! Diane Von Furstenberg! Joanna making Laura gulp in horror!

Join me for all the fun!

With the holidays coming up quickly and belts everywhere tightening, it can be hard to come up with great gifts for friends and family… that is, unless you’re a fellow crafty person! Just a few basic ingredients and a little time and effort will produce delicious gifts nearly everyone on your list will love.

For instance, see that elegant cruet of rosemary infused olive oil? If you have a rosemary bush nearby, bottles with firm stoppers or caps, a stove and some olive oil, you’ve got a great gift for the foodie on your list. Just follow the simple instructions at Lulu’s Bites and delight your friends!

Oh, and don’t forget that you can use the same method with a lot of other herbs, too. Thyme? Or maybe even some chili peppers? And citrus zest is a winner, too.

But how about some things that are ready to eat rather than an ingredient for future cooking?

How about homemade truffles? Nearly everyone likes chocolate in some form, and truffles are a lot easier to make than most people realize. The key, as I’m happy to note is firmly stated in this fabulous how-to article at Not Without Salt, is using the best chocolate you can get. Well worth noting: she includes instructions for a white peppermint ganache as well as the traditional chocolate, some handy ideas for further flavorings, and alternate uses for leftover (if you have any!) ganache. Did you ever think about using it to make hot chocolate? That’s an idea that’s going straight to the head of my to do list!

Then again, everyone gives chocolates. Who gives homemade pancake syrup? You can find recipes for five different varieties in this article at Simple Bites. A jar of syrup (I can’t wait to try the molasses cinnamon [pictured above] and the orange honey!), a homemade pancake mix, a few tips on care and handling of the syrup, and a festive ribbon would make a grand gift to the pancake lover in your life.

Of course you can always do what I do for the neighbors. I usually bake a cake, a pie, or a spicy quick bread for each of them. Last year was a delectably gooey ginger cake that I may just have to make again, it was so good.

Then again, the lure of making vanilla extract is tugging at me. All that takes is a pint of vodka, a vanilla bean, and a sharp knife. Slice the vanilla bean lengthwise without cutting it entirely in half, put it in the bottle of vodka. Close the lid tightly and store in a cool, dark place for a couple weeks. Voila! Vanilla extract fit for the most important baking project!

Bon appetite, to you and your kin!

One thing I love about the online crafting community is that I get to see work by people I might otherwise never hear about. That’s probably my single favorite thing about my single favorite feature on the blog CraftyPod. Sister Diane sends out a series of questions to a crafter who responds with visual answers.

The most recent Image Only Interview is with Barbara McIntyre of Browneyedbabs.

This is the illustration she picked for how she feels when crafting. It means ‘excited,’ BTW.

Check out a few of these delightful and imaginative interviews. Then go check out some of the equally delightful and imaginative interviewees. You’ll be glad you did.

It’s that time of the year when people who wouldn’t put a wreath on their door at any other time… put one up. There’s something about the winter holidays that does that to people.

But of course the thing I like about it is that it’s easy to get creative and come up with something rather fabulous with a minimum of funding, time, and even effort.

For instance, that gorgeous pinecone wreath up there? Made with found pinecones, an oven,  a glue gun, some spray paint, and a ribbon fashioned out of burlap. Chances are that if you’re crafty, you’ve already got at least a couple of those things lying around your home. The rest? Won’t cost much and are easy to find.

To get the skinny on how to do it, head on over to Twigg Studios and simply follow the simple instructions. Start in the morning, and I’m betting it could be on your door or hanging over your mantelpiece either in the evening, or the following morning.

Oh, and keep in mind that the oven setting of 180C comes out to roughly 350F.

There are a couple things I’d love to find under the tree this year. Here they are:

First off, I’d like a nice selection of rovings in pretty colors to do more needle felting with. I like this selection of 50 colors from Mielke’s Fiber Arts. At just $32.00, it’s even a deal.

I could also use some pretty new lace bobbins from Knotwork Lace Tools. Pretty and practical. I love these bobbins!

So what about all of you? What crafting goodies would you love to have Santa deliver down your chimney?

Tell us all about it!