Crafty Teacher Lady

Our Birth & Recovery Story

2021-08-11T15:37:00.005-04:00

I cannot believe our sweet girl is already 7 months old! Those early weeks were such a blur of diaper changes, middle of the night feedings, and just basically trying to survive and adjust to our new normal. Now that I've had a little bit of time to catch my breath and I finally feel more like myself after a rather difficult recovery, I wanted to share our birth story.

When I unexpectedly gave birth to our son at only 20 weeks along, it was a completely devastating and traumatic event. I desperately wanted our experience this second time around to be one where we felt prepared and excited when it was finally time to meet our daughter. Because of my history with preterm birth, I was considered high risk throughout this pregnancy and was much more closely monitored by a team of maternal-fetal specialists. As far as they could assess, both the baby and I were healthy throughout my entire pregnancy but, since the same was true for my previous pregnancy, I'm not sure I ever fully relaxed.

Annie Immello Photography

I wasn't due until January 25th, however, I ended up going to the hospital with contractions at 34.5 weeks pregnant. I was sent to triage and they monitored my contractions and told me I was already 2cm dilated. Many women walk around for weeks while dilated before they deliver, so when my contractions stopped and I hadn't progressed any further, they felt comfortable sending me home. The doctors recommended I have steroid shots, which would help the baby's lungs develop faster just in case she did eventually end up coming early, so they gave me a shot before we headed home (I had to go back the next night for a second dose and boy do those shots hurt...ouch).

For the next couple weeks I made sure to rest, drink lots of water, and just generally take it easy in an attempt to keep the baby in as long as possible. Since I had made it to 34 weeks already, the doctors felt confident that if she came early, at this point along she would have a really good chance of not only surviving but thriving without any major long term issues. Still, I desperately wanted to make it to full term, which the doctors considered 37 weeks.

Fast forward two more weeks (December 30th) and I decided it was a good day to take down our Christmas tree and decorations. Normally I'd wait until after New Year's Eve to do this but I just wanted things cleaned up and put away before our baby decided to make her arrival. Sure enough, that evening around 7pm I started feeling a bit off so I went to bed to rest. I started feeling mild contractions and by 8pm they had gotten intense enough that I asked my husband to start timing them. Not even an hour later the contractions had increased in intensity and were 5 minutes apart so we knew it was time to head to the hospital because things were progressing quickly. We live almost an hour away from where I would deliver so we weren't taking any chances by waiting around. Fortunately, because of our scare two weeks earlier, our bags were packed and ready to go!

Christmas 2020

(our sweet girl would arrive 6 days later)

When they assessed me at the hospital at 10pm I was 4cm dilated and the contractions were still consistent so I was admitted. I immediately asked for an epidural but they said because I was a few days shy of 37 weeks I was still considered preterm and couldn't have an epidural until I was 6cm dilated. When they checked me again an hour later I was dilated enough and got some relief! Things initially progressed pretty quickly and I was fully dilated and effaced by 1am. However, the baby wasn't moving down into place in order for me to start pushing because she was sunny side up (ideally babies should not only be head down but should also be facing down when moving through the pelvis)! The doctors tried going in manually and turning her (which hurt!!!!!) but she turned right back.

I was told that it was still possible for me to push her out but it was going to take a lot more effort than if she were facing down in the ideal delivery position. They would only let me push for up to four hours before they would elect to do a c-section (while also monitoring the baby's heart rate). All I heard was that I was going to have to push for FOUR HOURS and still end up with a c-section so I told them to just go ahead with a c-section...the thought of having to labor that long and then still end up with a c-section just put me over the edge!

Apparently some women don't feel the relief of the epidural as effectively and unfortunately I am one of those women, which I learned when I started gradually feeling more pain as labor progressed! But, the team that was with me offered a lot of support and encouragement by telling me there was a good chance I could push her out in less than four hours and they helped by having me labor in lots of different positions to encourage the baby to make her way down and out.

Fortunately from that point, it only ended up taking two hours of pushing (which was still A LOT) to get her out and Miss Charlotte Anne was born at 11:28am on New Year's Eve! She turned face down right before I pushed her out so I suppose this just means she does things in her own time!

She let out a cry immediately and so did I...I sobbed from relief, both from the pain of labor and from hearing that she was strong and healthy upon their initial assessment. They put her on my chest and we were just so thankful that she was here. Although, she was 3.5 weeks early and a little peanut at 5lbs, 14oz, she was perfectly healthy!

Those next couple of days in the hospital were such a blur. I was exhausted and because the baby was essentially stalled in one place during labor since she was facing the wrong way, she put a lot of pressure on my bladder. I ended up having some unforeseen complications which really limited my mobility while in the hospital and for quite a while after.

We stayed at the hospital for a few days so both baby and I could be monitored and then we went home to a very excited dog and a half naked Christmas tree still standing in the middle of the living room. Unfortunately, I had to have a catheter during my entire hospital stay and even had to go home with one as my bladder still couldn't function properly and it needed more rest to return to normal. Farmer Man took on the majority of the baby care because I was essentially bedridden until the catheter was removed a few days later at my doctor's office.

One Week Old

We also found out at Charlotte's first pediatrician appointment (which was two days after going home from the hospital) that she had jaundice and that we would need to immediately bring her to the children's hospital so she could have light therapy. So, we packed everything back up and headed to the hospital to spend the night. I was having horrible pains in my abdomen and ended up going over to the emergency room while Farmer Man stayed with the baby. Apparently both my uterus and my bladder were contracting as they were essentially trying to get back to normal and causing me pain and I also had a bladder infection caused by the catheter being inserted and removed so many times in the days following Charlotte's birth.

The light therapy worked and we were able to take the baby home the next afternoon. We consider ourselves so very fortunate that this was the extent of her medical needs considering she was preterm at 36.5 weeks. Unfortunately, this was only the start of my postpartum recovery issues as the antibiotics that I was given for the bladder infection essentially caused a chain reaction of other infections that would last months. I ended up needing surgery a few months later to heal a fissure that was caused from the extremely long period of pushing during labor (again, due to her being 'sunny side up'). I was completely unfamiliar with what a fissure was and really wish more people talked about this issue because it could have saved me months and months of significant pain if only I had known to see a doctor about this issue sooner. I also ended up needing to see a pelvic floor physical therapist for a couple months to help correct a bladder prolapse.

At this point, the infections from the antibiotics have cleared up and I'm no longer in physical therapy, but I'm still healing from the fissure surgery and I also recently found out I will need to have one more surgery to address some vaginal tissue that still hasn't healed from when I tore giving birth. This will mean another 4-6 weeks of stitches, but hopefully it's the last of the surgeries needed as a result of giving birth almost 8 months ago!

Taking care of a newborn and adjusting to new parenthood is in itself quite challenging, but doing it while also having a lot of physical pain for months following giving birth is incredibly demoralizing. I often couldn't take care of the baby or get back to normal household activities in the way that I wanted and I cried myself to sleep very often from sheer pain and exhaustion. These complications also had a significant impact on my milk supply and breastfeeding in general but I'm proud that I was able to give her at least some breast milk for the first 8 weeks. Before she was born, I never planned on giving my baby formula but I also never anticipated having so many recovery issues. Although at first I felt a lot of guilt, ending breast feeding early was a huge weight lifted off of me physically and mentally and was absolutely the best decision for our family.

Annie Immello Photography

Charlotte is now a happy, healthy, thriving baby and we are cherishing every day with her. New motherhood has been the most challenging yet rewarding experience, watching her change so quickly and discovery the world around her. We are so very lucky to have her here with us and I know her big brother John is watching over our family.

Check out Charlotte's Sweet Floral Nursery HERE!

Baby Girl's Sweet Floral Nursery

2020-11-20T15:53:00.007-05:00

Before I was expecting our second baby, I kept myself busy and distracted from the grief I was facing from losing our son by daydreaming about our future nursery. I wasn't sure if we would get pregnant again but viewed my designs and dreams for the nursery decor as an act of faith and optimism and this was also the last room left to renovate in our current home. I painted the walls one of my favorite colors, a soothing and gender-neutral greenish-gray and added board and batten to one wall. My husband also installed new flooring. As soon as I found out we were expecting a little girl, I knew I wanted to add just a touch of femininity by using the most gorgeous floral wallpaper on an accent wall. The wallpaper is removable and peel and stick so it was very easy to install! Her nursery is still pretty neutral overall with greens, grays, and whites, but every now and then there are sweet touches of pink!

The silver bank and the sweet little bunny were both my toys from when I was a child

By thrifting and buying items second hand and then giving them a makeover, I was able to furnish the entire nursery for just over $200! The dresser above was a FREE find off of Facebook Marketplace. I painted it with white chalk paint and added inexpensive glass knobs. I also used leftover wallpaper to add some color to the large thrifted frame above the dresser that I painted with chalk paint. This was the same frame I used to make a 'just married' sign for our wedding dinner and I was happy to repurpose it here!

The crib is originally from Pottery Barn and retails for over $1,000 but I got it off of Facebook Marketplace for $150! It's super sturdy and in great condition as is the mattress. The wooden rocking chair belonged to my husband's great grandmother and it was used in his nursery as well. I made a custom cushion for it using a patio chair cushion from the dollar store as a template.

The bookcase in the nursery was another Facebook Marketplace find that I scored fo $40. It definitely needed some love to turn it from basic office furniture to cute and nursery-worthy. I removed the faux wood back panel and added a sheet of beadboard and then painted it with white chalk paint to give it a cottage feel. It'll be perfect for storing lots of toys, books, and other baby items.

Our dog Stanley has already made himself at home in the nursery and LOVES lying on the rug in there! I still have a few items I'd like to add, like a lamp and some picture ledges, but I'm so pleased with how this space turned out, a huge change from where it began. We can't wait to bring our sweet little girl home!

ROOM SOURCES:

Wall Paint Color- Sherwin William's Sea Salt

Favorite White Chalk Paint

Spoonflower Soft Meadow Floral Wallpaper

Soft Meadow Floral Fabric for shelf bunting

Diamond Trellis Area Rug

Pink Velvet Children's Hangers with Floral Dividers

Glass Knobs on Dresser

Changing Table Basket

Floral Baby Headbands

Fabric Bow Baby Headbands

Large Woven Storage Basket

Flooring

Our Amazon Baby Registry

We're Having Another Baby: Pregnancy After Loss

2020-11-15T15:00:00.006-05:00

It was around this time last year that we excitedly told our families that we were expecting our first baby. Everything was going so well and both the baby and I were healthy and strong. We could never expect that a few months later, at the end of January, I would very suddenly go into labor and deliver our son at 20 weeks gestation. He had a heartbeat and lived for 5 short hours, the most excruciating 5 hours of our lives, as we waited for him to inevitably pass away.

The weeks and months that followed were an incredible blur of grief like no other, physical and emotional healing, confusion about why this happened, and fear that I wouldn't be able to get pregnant again, or if I did, that I wouldn't be able to carry a baby to full term.

Six weeks after giving birth I had a postpartum check up with my practitioner and we discussed when it would be possible to try again for another baby. She said that physically I was healthy and recovering well from giving birth and advised that we wait at least three months before trying again. She also suggested that I make an appointment with a maternal-fetal specialist who could hopefully give us more answers as to why this happened and advise us on the best path moving forward. Unfortunately, the day before my scheduled specialist appointment in March, we got a call that said all consult appointments were being pushed to July because of the Covid-19 outbreak so I wouldn't be seen unless I got pregnant before then.

Having no concrete answers as to why I delivered our son prematurely coupled with our canceled appointment with the specialist made the thought of trying for another baby was very scary, particularly because much of what I researched had said that if you have had one premature delivery you are at an increased risk of having another. Still, in my mind, the thought of not trying for another baby because I was afraid of the future outcome was just too much to bare- we couldn't let fear dictate our decision to try again. Also, at 39 years old, I felt I didn't have the luxury of waiting too long before trying to get pregnant.

We waited three months, enough time for my cycles to get back to normal and to let my body heal, and then we tried again. To our astonishment, we were pregnant again on the first try! It felt like a miracle!

We shared the exciting news with our family and close friends pretty much right away but waited until I was much further along in the pregnancy before sharing anything on social media. I've gotten a lot of great questions about the pregnancy and the baby so I thought I'd answer some FAQs right here!

Q: How did you get pregnant so quickly?

Did you use ovulation tracking apps or other resources to help you get pregnant?

Let me preface this response by saying that sometimes you can do all the 'right' things and life events still don't turn out how you hope or go as fast as you'd like. Losing our son after we got pregnant right away and had a perfectly healthy pregnancy up until he was born prematurely taught me that sometimes things happen for which there are absolutely no good reasons and that in the end, you can do everything 'right' and still have a horrible outcome...some things are just out of our control.

Having said that, in preparation for trying to conceive I tried to educate myself as best I could to increase our chances. I had always heard and read that it becomes increasingly difficult to get pregnant the older you are so I definitely had a good amount of fear and tried to have realistic expectations about how long it would take us to get pregnant. I didn't meet my husband until I was 37 (you can read about our love story here) and we got married when I was 38.5 years old so we pretty much started trying to conceive shortly after our wedding and my big move from Maine to Virginia.

One of the best resources I have used to truly help with understanding how to best increase the chances of conceiving is the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Reproductive Health. This book is awesome not only for trying to conceive but also just understanding how the female body works (so far beyond what was ever taught in any of the health classes I took), how to prevent getting pregnant, how to know if something is 'wrong' or out of whack physically, and preparing for menopause.

What I found interesting in the book regarding trying to conceive is that many couples who think they have fertility issues are actually just timing sex incorrectly and therefore missing part or all of their fertile windows- who knew?!

With help from the book and a free fertility charting app, I tracked my cycles and used inexpensive but effective ovulation test strips so I would know when I was about to ovulate. It can seem daunting to take your temperature every day (I used a basal body temp thermometer) and track information in an app, but I actually enjoyed learning more about how my body was functioning and it made me feel like I had some sense of control.

Research indicates that eating well, maintaining a health body weight, limiting or eliminating alcohol and caffeine intake, avoiding smoking, and getting plenty of sleep can have an impact on fertility for both males and females. And of course, genetics and age, which are out of our control, can also play a role when trying to conceive. The book mentioned above discusses these factors as well.

A few of my close friends have also tried acupuncture with a fertility specialist and have had positive outcomes after struggling to conceive. I can't speak to that experience but it might be worth looking into if you are having trouble. *Be sure to speak with your practitioner about various health concerns as I am not a doctor or medical expert.

Q: How did you find out you were expecting again and what was your reaction?

Because I was tracking my cycles very closely I knew when I was ovulating and therefore knew roughly when I could start taking pregnancy tests. The ovulation tests I purchased also come with a bunch of inexpensive pregnancy test strips so I didn't feel bad taking a test each each around the time that I might possibly be pregnant. Two days after Mother's Day (which was so difficult to get through after losing our son and not knowing if we would be blessed with another baby), I took a pregnancy test even though I knew it may have been a bit too early in my cycle to get a positive result. I saw the very faintest shadow of a positive line...it really didn't even look like a line but more of a slight discoloration almost invisible to the naked eye. I showed it to my husband and he couldn't see anything but I swore there was something there. So, I waited until later that day and took another test...sure enough, there was a very, very faint positive line!

Over the next couple of days I took more tests and the positive lines kept getting darker- a sign we were progressing in the right direction! I was so incredibly (but cautiously) excited and just really couldn't believe that I got pregnant again so quickly!

Q: When are you due? How far along are you?

I am just about 30 weeks along and am due in mid-January.

Q: How have you been feeling both physically and emotionally? Sick at all? Are you constantly afraid you'll lose this baby, too?

I'm very thankful that with both pregnancies my first trimester symptoms were relatively mild compared to the stories I've heard from other women. I did have some nausea for several weeks early on, usually in the late afternoon and evening, but thankfully never bad enough to vomit. Eating crackers, almonds, and apples seemed to help as did anti-nausea candies which come in both ginger & peppermint flavors (I bought and ate both).

Early on, and then again during late second trimester, I was incredibly tired as well. Luckily I'm not currently teaching or subbing and am thankful for the opportunity to rest whenever needed. Now that I've entered the third trimester, I'm definitely feeling aches and pains that come with carrying extra weight and have battled lower back/sciatica pain off and on throughout my pregnancy.

Some days I feel amazing, other days I overdo it and need to slow myself down and rest (which is often tough as I'm always feeling the need to be productive and do projects around the house). I've had to remind myself that my main 'job' right now is stay healthy and carry this baby to term.

Emotionally, I've certainly had moments of incredible fear, as can be expected after losing a baby the way we did, but I've really tried to remain calm and positive overall (peppered with bad days here and there), knowing that in the end so much is out of my control. I've also had moments of incredible sadness as certain events and milestones in this pregnancy remind me of the son we lost and I miss him all the time. It's certainly a crazy mixed-bag of emotions when you are so joyful about your current baby but so heartbroken over your first baby. I try to take each day as it comes, just so grateful for another day that our sweet baby is still safely inside my belly.

Q: Have you had any strange food cravings or aversions?

During my first pregnancy I really craved BLT sandwiches and orange juice! I really haven't had any strong cravings during this pregnancy, however, I eat apples pretty much every single day. I would't say I crave them I just think they are a healthy was to keep hunger and nausea away.

Q: Do you know the sex of the baby?

I had bloodwork taken for genetic testing around week 10 of this pregnancy so we did find out the sex of the baby shortly thereafter. There's a delicious wood-fired pizza bakery around the corner from my doctor's office so I asked my doctor to write down the sex in an envelope and then took it to the bakery on my way home. They were kind enough to bake a pepperoni letter into the pizza indicating the baby's sex so when I got home, my husband and I opened the box and found out what we are having (spoiler alert: IT'S A...baby, but we already knew that, ha ha). Our close friends and family know the sex of the baby but I think I'll wait until I share the nursery decor before sharing with everyone else.

Q: Have you picked out a name?

We do have a name but will wait until baby is here before announcing to the world. Lets just say it was pretty difficult to find a name we both agreed on but eventually settled on something we both like so that's what we are going with!

Q: Have you started decorating the nursery? Theme? When do we get a nursery tour? Can we paint while pregnant?

Yes! I actually painted the room that will become the nursery before I got pregnant with this baby and before we knew the sex. I tend to gravitate toward neutral, calming colors and decor so I chose a paint color and furniture options that are gender neutral before adding some more colorful accessories. I still have a few projects left to tackle and then I will share the nursery along with whether we are expecting a boy or a girl!

Pregnant women should avoid breathing toxic fumes so I have limited the types of projects and the types of paints I've used while pregnant. Chalk paint is a good option because it has very little odor as do paints labeled 'low VOC' so those are some of the materials I've painted with while pregnant. I also always have the windows open and a fan going and wear a ventilation mask while painting or sanding to limit breathing in anything potentially harmful.

Q: How has it been being pregnant during Covid?

The most challenging part has been that my husband cannot come with me to any of my appointments or ultrasounds. It makes me sad that he can't be there to witness the ultrasounds in person or to be an extra set of ears when discussing important issues with my doctors. But, it is what it is, and thankfully (as of right now) he is allowed to be with me when I actually deliver the baby.

We don't go very many places because we obviously don't want to risk exposure to Covid-19 so I have had a lot of time to rest (although sometimes, like many people, I go a bit stir crazy being home so much). It has been tough not being able to celebrate this baby in the way I would've liked with a traditional baby shower but we were able to have a small celebration here in Virginia and I celebrated with my Maine family and friends via Zoom. It's a scary time we are living in and I've really had to focus on remaining as calm and stress-free as I can for the good of the baby.

Q: Do you have to do anything different this pregnancy because of your history? Are you considered high-risk?

I am considered high-risk simply because of my history of premature delivery. I switched to a maternal-fetal specialist practice that focuses on high-risk pregnancies and from about week 14-24 I had ultrasounds every two weeks to measure my cervix and to be monitored much more closely than during my first pregnancy. As per the recommendation of my doctor, I take a progesterone prescription every day as well as a baby aspirin in addition to the prenatal vitamins and extra folic acid I was already taking (*you should check with your doctor before taking any medications, over the counter or otherwise*). So far, every test they've done, every ultrasound, and all blood work has come back normal and I'm otherwise considered very healthy as is baby so it's sort of odd being considered high risk. I am thankful for the extra monitoring nonetheless.

We have also decided to deliver this baby at a larger hospital than the one where we had our son as they have an OBGYN at the hospital at all times and have a really good NICU should our baby come early. This larger hospital is almost an hour away but we feel like it's the best option for us going forward.

Q: What are your go-to dressy and casual pregnancy looks? Where do you shop for maternity clothes?

A silver lining to being pregnant during a pandemic is that I am home most of the time and therefore have not really had to buy a lot of maternity clothes. I've been living in leggings and tanks layered with tunics, open cardigans, and button-down tops that layer nicely over some basic pieces. I did shop at some local thrift stores during my first pregnancy to find some pieces that would work while pregnant and many of my non-maternity clothes have worked up until a few weeks ago when I started getting really big.

I've purchased most maternity items from Target, Old Navy, Shein (really cute stuff that is super affordable), and Amazon. I've created an Amazon favorites list for maternity essentials and will plan to do a dedicated post on affordable maternity fashion at some point soon.

Q: What's the coolest and most challenging thing about pregnancy? What makes you most excited about having a baby?

The coolest part of pregnancy is feeling the baby move and kick- it still just amazes me that there's a little human in there! I felt true kicks for the first time at 21 weeks (I'd been feeling little flutters here and there before that point which I assumed was baby but was waiting for the moment when I knew for sure it was a baby kick). I never got to feel true baby kicks with our son so I will never take this experience for granted.

I can't move around and do all the projects I'd like to accomplish because being pregnant and high-risk means I have physical limitations and that has been pretty challenging.

I am super excited to see what this baby looks like and also just to experience the world through a child's eyes. I look forward to starting new family traditions and seeing the joy and excitement of our child through the holidays.

(Last Two Photos: Annie Immello Photography)

Although we don't know what exactly lies ahead, we are so excited, hopeful, and thankful to have been given another opportunity to be parents. Thank you to the countless number of people who have offered kind words, congratulations, and well wishes as we look forward to the arrival of our sweet baby!

Surviving the Death of Our Baby

2020-03-24T18:09:00.003-04:00

It's been eight weeks since our baby died...I'm not really sure of a more eloquent way to start writing, so there it is. With every fiber of my being I wish I didn't have to write those words and I so desperately wish that this was not a part of our story. It was only a few months ago that I sat at this very computer to write a blog post sharing that I was joyfully and excitedly pregnant and expecting our first baby this coming June. At 39 years old, I SO surprised and grateful that I got pregnant right away and that I was having a healthy and complication-free pregnancy. Like most couples, we 'played it safe' and waited until I was in my second trimester to make our happy news public. No one really talks about second and third trimester pregnancy loss and everything we were told and have read about lead us to believe that our chances of losing our baby were very small once I made it out of my first trimester and past those first 12 weeks. So, when that milestone came, I started to relax a bit and let myself make all sorts of plans because I started to feel like we were 'safe' and our dream of becoming parents was really going to happen.

With every check up I had, our baby measured perfectly on schedule and had a very strong heartbeat, and all of the tests (blood tests, blood pressure, genetic tests, etc.) came back perfectly normal throughout my entire pregnancy. Even my first trimester was pretty easy, with mild symptoms, so I felt incredibly thankful with each passing day. Losing our baby was not even on our radar, certainly not at 20 weeks after having a seemingly perfect, healthy pregnancy for myself and our baby, which is why what came next was, and still is, so difficult to understand and accept.

The last picture taken of me, in Maui, while pregnant with our darling baby boy

The day we lost our baby started out as any other day. We had come back from our belated honeymoon trip to Maui a few days earlier, so I was spending the day cleaning and doing chores around the house. I had spent that morning putting together an invitee list to give to my mom as she was making plans for my baby shower. Physically, I felt good throughout our trip and I also felt good that particular day. Around dinner time my lower back started to hurt, which wasn't unusual if I was relatively active during the day. Everything I had read in my various baby books and apps said back pain was a normal symptom of pregnancy, particularly in the second trimester. I laid down on the couch with a heating pad as I had done many times before when my back hurt. But this time the pain started to feel different, pulsing in and out in increments, accompanied by lower abdominal cramping. I took some Tylenol and drank a lot of water, hoping I would start to feel better. After a couple hours I started to feel some pelvic pressure and decided to call my doctor. He didn't sound too concerned but suggested I go to the hospital to be checked out just to be safe. As my husband drove me to the hospital, I started to feel what I thought were contractions in my back, coming about every 3-4 minutes. I started to become concerned while also just trying to stay calm and manage the pain as best I could. Even as we arrived at the hospital and checked into the maternity ward, it didn't even cross either of our minds that I was going to deliver our baby...everything in our pregnancy had been going so well.

After I was in our hospital room, I was started on an IV with fluids, hooked up to a contraction monitor, and the baby's heartbeat was checked. He still had a very strong heartbeat, which was a relief. As my contractions continued to get stronger, the nurse didn't seem concerned and the doctor still hadn't arrived, even after a couple hours, so my husband and I still didn't think this was it- that this was when our baby was coming. No one seemed to think he was coming or at least there still didn't seem to be a sense of urgency on the part of the medical staff that night. The nurse checked my cervix and I was one centimeter dilated. I started to get very scared and she said the doctor would check again when he arrived. At this point, I was in full on labor and the pain was unbearable and yet they weren't doing anything for my pain so I started to cry from distress. We hadn't yet gotten to the labor and delivery chapters of our respective baby books so both my husband and I were very unprepared to deal with any of this. I really thought at that point that they would be able to give me fluids and medication to stop labor and everything would be fine.

When the doctor finally arrived, he checked my cervix and he could feel my water bag (it hadn't broken but was protruding which is a bad sign). I started to cry even more and asked him if that meant the baby was coming. He said it didn't look good but they would try to give me some medication to stop labor from progressing. I asked if our baby would survive if he did come out at 20 weeks and the doctor said he would not survive outside the womb very long at this stage of development. Everyone left the room (I assume to get medication but honestly I still don't understand why we were left completely alone) and I told my husband that I really needed to use the bathroom. I got up and hobbled to the bathroom while my husband wheeled the IV behind me. While I was alone in the bathroom our baby came out so fast and unexpectedly. I screamed uncontrollably and my husband ran out into the hallway to get help.

Everything after was such a blur...the doctor and nurses came rushing into the bathroom to help me and our son and it quickly turned into what I can only describe as an out of body experience. They moved me to the bed to deliver the placenta while the nurses tended to the baby. I thought because he was so early that he wasn't alive but he was...he had a heartbeat and lived for the next 5 hours. The doctor and nurses said he looked absolutely perfect for his stage of development and had no signs that anything was wrong with him. As far as they could tell, he was perfectly healthy. My doctor was also stunned that I delivered so quickly because he said most preterm labor and deliveries happen over the course of several hours. I suppose this explains why it seemed like there was no sense of urgency leading up to my delivery. I still have a lot of confusion and anger surrounding how our delivery was handled but I'm learning to make peace with these feelings and to accept that the outcome would probably be the same no matter what.

I cannot accurately describe the pain that comes with sitting in a hospital bed with your baby in a bassinet across the room while you wait for his heart to stop beating. Because he was so early, there was nothing medically to be done to save him so we just had to wait. Had he been born even 3 or 4 weeks later, perhaps he could have lived, but the 'could haves' and 'should haves' and 'might haves' after an experience like this are too many to count and too painful to keep asking.

The hours that followed after his birth were all a blur- truly an out of body experience that I have not ever experienced before. It didn't feel like any of this was real...it didn't feel like our son was really here....it didn't feel like we were really there experiencing this, particularly because it all happened so incredibly fast, with no warning at all, so our brains just could not process what was happening.

In one of the books I've been reading about grief, it says that when you are experiencing something incredibly painful and traumatic, a part of your brain shuts down and either fights, flees, or freezes- and this is exactly how I felt at that time- my brain could not process the excruciating pain that I was experiencing and therefore it just completely shut down as a form of protection. I was asked to hold our baby, to take pictures with our baby, to name our baby for his birth and death certificates, we even had to contact a funeral home, all within a few hours of his birth. My brain was just not equipped to deal with any of this at the time, not to mentioned what my body had just gone through, and looking back, I harbor a lot of guilt as there are some actions and decisions made that I wish we had done differently. I try to give myself some grace now because I know that we did the best we could at the time and we were just not capable of doing anything other than what was done. I was in an absolute fog, I wasn't mentally in my body, and it took well over a week after being home for my brain to even truly accept what had happened as real. I audibly said multiple times in the week that followed "Did I really give birth? Is our baby really dead?" and yet the answer was always the same.

We were told that they wanted me to stay in the hospital for at least 12 hours after my delivery to monitor me before letting us go home. We sat in that room and sobbed through our numbness...we just wanted to go home and wakeup from this nightmare. Once we got home, I went to our room and rarely left our bed. I got up and went to the bathroom when needed, but I dreaded showering or looking in the mirror because it meant I had to look at my postpartum body, a painful reminder that I had given birth but my baby was not here with me. I had looked in that mirror every single day of my pregnancy, excitedly watching my body change and my belly grow, and now it was just too painful to see my belly slowing shrinking. My breasts became swollen and painful as they filled with milk, with no baby to nourish. My body thought my baby was here and did what is was naturally supposed to do, but it didn't know that our sweet baby boy had died. Dealing with the physical aftermath of giving birth was just another cruel daily reminder of what had happened.

I sat in our bedroom for several weeks, day in and day out, letting the waves of grief wash over me as they pleased. I felt completely and utterly broken, a shell of my former self. One moment I'd accept what had happened as our new reality, and the next I would collapse onto the floor or into the arms of my husband, the grief so intense it was physically painful, my heart literally felt as though it was broken. I know that the grief any mother goes through when losing their baby in any way and at any point is painful, but sometimes I think it would be easier to accept the loss of our son if he had been sick or had died in the womb or I had miscarried during my first trimester when I was 'on guard' for that type of loss. Other times I think about scenarios in which losing him could have been even 'worse' than what we experienced and I'm thankful, as odd as that may sound. Either way, loss is loss...I know this and it does no good to make comparisons, but my mind still thinks about 'what could have been'.

I have never experienced pain and grief so intensely, it felt, and still feels like a part of me is missing. I suppose that is in fact true...our son is a physical part of us who is gone and I don't know if I will every feel completely whole again. It's so bizarre because he was a stranger to us and yet so much a part of us. The time we had to get to know him was taken from us. We grieve the life we wish he could have had, the boy and man he would have grown up to be, the life we had already pictured for him and for our family. We envisioned holidays, his birthdays, running around on our farm, interacting with our friends and his grandparents. We not only grieve the death of our son but of the life we were going to have...the trajectory of our life and his life changed in an instant and that fact is really difficult to process and accept. Here we were, experiencing two of life's most significant events, the birth of our child and the death of our loved one, all within the course of a few hours...it's incredibly overwhelming.

When we are ready, we would like to try for another baby. This decision is incredibly scary because I'm older and worried about my ability to get pregnant again. To further complicate things, we were given no answers as to why this happened. At first we had speculated that perhaps it was an 'incompetent cervix' but were told by my delivering doctor that he did not think that was the case (if/when I do get pregnant, I will be considered high risk and monitored much more closely by a maternal and fetal specialist). Doctors have studied my charts, administered more tests, had the placenta analyzed, and have gone over my medical history and there is nothing to indicate why this happened. I am in seemingly perfect health, with no risk factors for preterm labor, and so was our baby. Apparently 2/3 of preterm births have no known biological cause and if you've had a preterm delivery, you are then more likely for it to happen again. I want to choose to believe that a healthy, full term pregnancy is in our future but there's also so much uncertainty and that is tough for me to accept and very scary.

The passing of time has helped to soften the sharp edges of grief, but there are still many questions I often struggle with...why did we get pregnant so easily only to have it taken away so suddenly? Why did our son die when he was perfectly healthy? Why do other people who don't even want children have babies so easily? Will this happen to us again? What is the point of remaining hopeful, positive, and grateful everyday, as I did throughout my entire pregnancy, if it's still going to end in devastation? What did I do to deserve this? What did I do to cause this? Why didn't my body keep my healthy baby inside longer SO HE COULD LIVE???? There are no answers to these questions, I know this, but still my mind wanders there sometimes.

So what now? What do you do when your whole world has changed and you have changed in ways you could never imagine? I'm often asked 'how are you doing?' by those who care, knowing that the answer will never be a simple one. So, how am I? I am as well as I can be considering all that has happened. There is no 'getting back to normal' but there is 'creating a new normal' as best as I can.

I'm proud of myself for trying to take active steps in helping process my grief while also coming to terms with what happened and trying to look forward toward a bright future for our family. I've read books, talked to a therapist, talked to friends, sought medical advice, heard from people who've gone through something similar, journaled, worked on my physical health, cried when I've needed to, and allowed myself to feel joy when I've needed to.

Getting out of my bed and making my way to the couch was a victory. Leaving the house for the first time (even if it ended in tears in the middle of Home Depot) was a victory. Going back to the doctors office for a check up after my delivery was a victory. Laughing for the first time, even when it evoked feelings of guilt, was a victory. Going out on a date night with my husband and being surrounded by happy families and babies, then actively reframing my inner narrative to say "I don't know their stories, they could have struggled too" was a victory. Facing my grief and emotions head on to write this narrative is a victory. Even the first time I went back to the grocery store felt like a victory because the last time I was there, I was happily pregnant, chatting with a friend I ran into about my upcoming ultrasound.

I've dreaded a million different situations that I knew would be triggering for me but yet over time, with small steps, I've faced these situations and consider them all small victories in my fight against an otherwise crippling grief. It's definitely not always easy and there are still certain situations that I avoid because they are just too painful, but it has all been a practice in patience and faith like no other I've ever experienced.

Throughout this experience of loss, there has been one constant, and that has been the incredibly steadfast love and support from so many. My husband and I have only been married for 9 months, and in that time have been faced with one of the most difficult situations any couple could go through- losing a child. This could easily push us apart, but instead, it has shown just how devoted we are to one another and strengthened us like nothing else could. In the last few months he has proven himself to be everything I could have asked for in a partner, even literally feeding me when I was paralyzed by grief.

Our families have experienced their own grief as their dreams of a first grandchild were crushed in an instant, and yet they put us first, checking in while also giving us the space we needed.

I consider myself so incredibly fortunate to have curated a group of quality people I'm blessed to call my friends. These are the type of friends who become your family, who feel your joy and grief as if it were their own, rooting for your successes and holding you close to their hearts during times of pain and uncertainty, forgiving your emotional distance or lack of social graces during your darkest times.

The kindness shown to us over the passed few months has proven that even in the darkest depths of grief, in the worst situation imaginable, there is so much love in the world. Messages from social media 'strangers', cards and letters from people I haven't spoken to in quite some time, meals delivered, a garden of flowers sent to our doorstep, incredibly touching gifts arriving out of the blue, and thoughtful words of encouragement from all over...it's been so humbling and has made me cry from love, a welcome reprieve from the tears of grief. Even writing that last sentence, I find myself pausing because in the end, deep grief cannot exist where there isn't also great, deep love.

So THANK YOU... thank you for loving us, for praying for us (however and to whomever that may be), for caring enough to read this, for offering words of solace and encouragement (even when there aren't the right words), for checking in on us, for being brave in your own journeys of grief, and for continuing to have hope that this isn't the end of our family's story.

And to our darling sweet baby John, you are LOVED by so many, you were wanted and wished for so badly, and you will be part of our hearts for as long as they are beating.

Your mommy and daddy love you so very much.

A Baby Story

2019-12-30T16:38:00.003-05:00

A little over a week ago I turned 39. If you had asked me 20 years ago if I thought I'd be pregnant with my first baby at this age, I would never have believed it. But, as I've learned through many experiences, events in life unfold exactly as they should, in their own time, despite what we may otherwise wish would happen.

I have always wanted to be a mother and although I tried my best to be patient in realizing this dream, truth be told, there were many times when I wondered if this would ever happen for me. I've been single most of my life and as each birthday came and went (particularly into my thirties), I was becoming fearful of my ever ticking 'biological clock'. About three years ago I went so far as to consult with my doctor about options for having a baby on my own and started doing lots of reading and research on single motherhood. While this route wasn't my first choice, I wasn't willing to give up on my dream simply because I hadn't yet found the right guy. After all my research, I had a choice to make: move forward with having a baby on my own or wait a while longer and see what else my dating life had in store for me, all while my fertile window was closing (damn you biology!!!). I decided to wait...six months later I met the man who would become my husband.

I've already started shopping for Baby R., including a thrift store cable knit sweater

After Farmer Man and I married this past summer we decided that because of my 'advanced maternal age' (which is apparently the nicer term for a 'geriatric pregnancy'), we would start trying for a baby right away. I fully expected it would take months of trying because of my age and because of so many stories I've heard of people struggling to conceive, particularly as they get older. I did lots of research on conception, bought ovulation test strips, and used cycle tracking apps all in the hopes of increasing our chances.

About a month after we started accurately tracking ovulation, I decided to take a pregnancy test 'just for fun'. I say this because even though we were actively trying for a baby, I really, truly did not think it would happen so quickly so I was expecting a negative result. Well, again, events in life unfold in their own time and I found out that day that I WAS PREGNANT!! I called Farmer Man and told him there was a very faint line on the pregnancy test and that I would take another just to be sure. We were both excited but also hesitant to believe that it was really true. I also initially felt really freaked out at the thought of this little thing growing in my body! It's such a weird experience and I really didn't know what to expect or how to react.

Could not believe my eyes when I saw the very faint lines

I wasn't really sure what to do at that point but I quickly found out that there's really not much you can do except wait and hope for the best. Miscarriage rates are higher for older women as are rates of abnormal chromosomal issues so although we were really happy and excited, this excitement was tempered knowing that really anything could happen. As the weeks progressed, I was feeling pretty good overall, with very mild symptoms. Then at around 7 weeks, I started to have spotting (light bleeding) along with cramping and low back pain and was fearful that I was losing the baby. Our first prenatal appointment wasn't scheduled for another 2 weeks so we had no way of knowing if everything was developing normally. Luckily, I was able to get an appointment with another doctor a week later and cried as we heard the little heartbeat during the ultrasound. Baby R. was measuring right on schedule and they couldn't find any reason for the spotting- all was well.

Per my doctor's recommendation, we did opt to do a couple genetic tests at 10 weeks and subsequently, the sex of the baby was also determined. I did not want to find out the sex until the baby was born as it just wasn't something that was important to me and I prefer more gender neutral clothes, toys, and decor. I also thought it would be such a fun surprise on 'birth day'. Farmer Man made several passionate speeches as to why he felt it was important to find out the sex and because it seemed very important to him, I had the doctor write it down on a card at my 13 week checkup. We now know the sex of Baby R. but are going to keep that between us and our close friends and family. We have settled on a name as well, but we are keeping that a secret until birth day!

Based on what I've read and heard about pregnancy symptoms, I feel very lucky to have had a pretty easy time of things overall so far (other than the scary bleeding incident). I had some mild nausea during the first trimester, usually setting in around dinner time and remedied with crackers and apple slices and not lasting more than a few weeks. My only cravings so far have been apples, orange juice, and BLT sandwiches. Farmer Man has been very helpful and thoughtful, always offering to run up to the store or rub my back if need be!

I'm now 16 weeks along and there has not been one day that's gone by that I haven't felt SO GRATEFUL for this opportunity. Because I've waited so long to become a mother and because I have witnessed grief in the hearts of some of my very best and dearest loved ones who've struggled with infertility and miscarriage, it is impossible for me to take this opportunity for granted. I've cried many tears of grief for the hurt of those who long to be parents but have not yet been given the opportunity- it weighs heavy on my heart. I honestly don't know why I've been given this opportunity and I don't know how this story will/could end, but I feel so incredibly thankful and grateful!

A Love Story Part 5: Our City Hall Elopement Wedding

2019-09-22T18:08:00.001-04:00

We've now arrived at the last of my 'love story' posts, OUR WEDDING!
If you'd like to start at the beginning of our story, start here with part one!

Before I share the details, you can watch our wedding video HERE!
I'm so very thankful that I decided to spend a little extra to have this video made as it's so incredibly special and brings us so much joy!

We started our wedding plans a month and a half before we were actually engaged. To many people, this may seem very untraditional, but we decided to make our own rules and do what was best for us! We knew we wanted to get married within the year and if we were to marry in Maine (which was really important to me), it just seemed logical to do it before I moved to Virginia. Neither of us envisioned a huge wedding on which we would spend a lot of money and with our short timeline that didn't seem to make sense logistically. We liked the intimacy of an elopement but also liked the idea of having some close friends and family with us to celebrate after, so we ending up doing a hybrid of both!

I had searched 'city hall elopement' in Google and ended up coming across some absolutely beautiful photos of weddings at Portland City Hall (the building is quite stunning inside and out). Portland is were I was born and I thought it would be fitting to marry here before I moved away to Virginia...a nice 'farewell to Maine' if you will. We decided we would get married just the two of us and then have a small group of family and friends meet us for dinner afterward. The perfect blend of intimacy and celebration.

But as is the case with all 'perfect' plans, there's usually something that goes awry and our wedding was no exception. A few months before our wedding day I called the city clerk to make sure they would be open the day after July 4th to which she assured me they would be. Then, four days BEFORE our wedding day, I got a notice that said the city manager had just decided to close on July 5th so we wouldn't be able to get married there after all. You can imagine my panic after receiving this news since our wedding was at the end of the week! Fortunately, after my mom contacted the city manager directly, he kindly offered to personally open up City Hall to us on our wedding day, which meant we ended up having the whole building to ourselves- a truly private ceremony!

We stayed at The Regency Hotel in Portland's Old Port section, which is centrally located between Portland City Hall and the ferry to Great Diamond Island. We checked in on July 4th and spent that evening with Farmer Man's parents and close friends who were able to make it up from Virginia for the wedding festivities. Lobster rolls and fireworks were on the agenda!

The next morning, our wedding day, we ordered breakfast and then I sent Farmer Man to a hang out with his buddies while I got ready. I hid in the bathroom while he popped back in to our room to put on his suit before heading outside to wait for me. We did a 'first look' in front of the hotel then walked together to city hall to say our vows.

After our exchanging our vows, we walked through the streets of the Portland Old Port down to the waterfront where our immediate family and some close friends were waiting. We all took a scenic ferry cruise of Casco Bay to Great Diamond Island where we had a lovely, intimate dinner in an old brick barn on the island. The space was gorgeous enough that I didn't really need to do much decorating, which was great. I did, however, make our 'just married' sign out of a thrift store frame, sewed some simple table runners, and purchased the white lanterns for the floral centerpieces from IKEA, which all went well with our coastal setting. The Maine coast is absolutely breathtaking, particularly in the summer, and we are so happy to have had this special island outing.

Other Details
After watching lots of YouTube tutorials, I decided to do my own hair and makeup. I'm very particular and decided to trust myself (and practice SEVERAL times before the big day). A couple of my friends came to the hotel and helped me get ready, which was really helpful.

I found my dress for $120 from Lauren Bridal. The website doesn't have very good reviews and I didn't know if it would actually fit or be good quality but the price was great so I decided to take a chance and order the dress. It ended up fitting really well and was exactly what I imagined for a city hall elopement!

My shoes are Badgely Mischka via Amazon and are the prettiest shoes I've ever worn! They were also the most uncomfortable shoes I've ever worn but the look was totally worth the pain! At $123, they were the priciest part of my outfit but I have no regrets- so beautiful!

I was on the fence about wearing a veil with a short dress but ended up ordering a simple $25 style from Etsy. Luckily, one of the friends helping me get ready on the wedding day was really persistent in convincing me to wear it. It ended up completing my look perfectly and made the photos and videos that much more beautiful! My entire wedding day look cost less than $300, perfect for a budget-friendly, low key wedding.

Farmer Man wore a suit coat & pants from H&M, paired with a shirt, shoes, and a belt that he already owned. I purchased his tie from Amazon, which completed his look for under $120. He could pretty much wear anything and look handsome!

Wedding Venders/Sources
Floral Arrangements: CM Skerritt Designs
Photography: Molly & Victoria Co.
Videographer: Miles Drouin
Marriage Venue: Portland City Hall, Portland, Maine
Officiant: Janice Gardner of Hitch Maine
Reception Dinner: The Art Gallery at Diamond's Edge Restaurant, Great Diamond Island
Ferry: Casco Bay Lines
Wedding Whoopie Pies: The European Bakery (owned by one of my former teaching colleagues)
Invitations & Place Cards: Minted

Following our wedding, we had a more casual "I Do BBQ" in both Maine and Virginia so we could invite and celebrate with a larger group of extended family and friends, both of which were really fun and relatively stress-free! Our wedding day was everything we hoped it would be, the intimacy of both our ceremony and dinner was very special and being able to celebrate with more family and friends after the fact only added to our happy memories.

Some have wondered if people were upset or offended because we got married without anyone at the ceremony and had a very limited guest list for the dinner reception. To that I would answer that the couple getting married should do what feels right to them and those who love them will understand and respect their choices, whatever they may be! Thank you for for reading our love story!

A Love Story Part 4: An Engagement

2019-09-06T12:10:00.003-04:00

After I spent the summer in Virginia, Farmer Man and I knew we wanted to continue to be together and that I would eventually move to be with him. I was starting a new school year so we would have to go back to long-distance dating for 10 months before I could make the move. With such a big step, naturally we also talked about our shared desire to get engaged/married within the next year to solidify that we were fully committed to being together.

Fall and winter came and went and before we knew it spring was here. At the beginning of March, Farmer Man and I were talking about the move and making future plans and the topic of marriage came up once again. I knew I wanted to get married in Maine (and Farmer Man was open to that) and we knew that we wanted to get married sometime within the year. We weren't even engaged yet but somehow the wedding plans were already being made! We ended up picking the venue and subsequently the date of our wedding a month and a half BEFORE we were actually engaged!

During April vacation I went to Virginia to spend the week with Farmer Man. Since we had already made the wedding plans, a proposal was just a matter of time! I was really hoping this would be the week he would propose but really had no idea where or how he would do it. At the start of our week together we drove down to Charleston, SC to visit some friends and I thought maybe it would happen there since there are so many beautiful and romantic spots. On the other hand, I really couldn't picture him proposing in front of other people and thought maybe he wanted to do it somewhere closer to home in a place that was special to us.

Toward the end of the week, we were back in Virginia and the proposal hadn't happened yet. I was beginning to wonder if he was going to do it at all! On the day before I was going to head back to Maine, he said a couple of his friends wanted to meet us for dinner that night at one of our favorite restaurants in one of my favorite little nearby towns. As we were getting ready for dinner that night, he said his friends cancelled and it would be just the two of us going to dinner. We parked and were walking down the street toward the restaurant and I commented that it was a bit chilly so he ran back to the car saying he would look for a jacket (little did I know but he was actually taking the ring out of his glove box)!!

We had a lovely dinner together and as we were walking back toward the car he stopped me on the street corner in front of a bed and breakfast, pulled me close, kissed me and told me he loved me. Then, he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him! I jokingly said 'OK, how bout July 5th?' since that was the date we had already picked for the wedding. He put the ring on my finger and told me he knew how much I loved that little town and now we would have to come back each year and stay in the bed and breakfast to remember the night we got engaged! It was sweet, thoughtful, romantic, private, and understated- just very 'Farmer Man'!

The proposal was on the street corner just behind me in Smithfield, Virginia

The ring design is something we both love- a very simple and classic style. What makes it special and unique, however, is that the center diamond belonged to Farmer Man's grandmother! It would serve as my 'something old' on our wedding day.

Before I left to go back to Maine, we took a few engagement photos on the farm so we could finally make our happy news known to the world! Our wedding was only 2.5 months away so as soon as I was back in Maine, the planning was in full swing (along with getting my house ready to sell and preparing to leave my teaching career of 15 years)! Needless to say, it was the most hectic few months I've ever experienced!

Here's the next part of the story:

A Love Story Part 5: The Wedding

Other Parts of This Series

A Love Story Part 1: The Single Life

A Love Story Part 2: Unexpected Double Date

A Love Story Part 3: Long Distance Relationship

A Love Story Part 3: Long Distance Relationship

2019-08-22T19:39:00.002-04:00

After our awesome first/second dates in Maine, Farmer Man went back home to Virginia. I cried when he left because there's was so much uncertainty about what would happen at that point and I knew he was someone special. He called me on his drive back home and we chatted for a while but still, what was next for us?

I asked him if I could come visit him as I'd always wanted to visit Jamestown and Colonial Williamsburg, both 'bucket list' places for this social studies teacher! He told me he'd love for me to visit and so I planned a trip to see him at the end of March (which was about six weeks away...an agonizing wait)!

In the meantime, we chatted on the phone every couple of days, sent funny texts, which often referenced our common love of The Office, and got to know each other more with each conversation. We discussed early on what each other's goals were in terms of a relationship because neither of us were interested in wasting the other person's time. I was very clear that I wanted marriage and kids and told him it was OK if those weren't things he was ready for, he just needed to be upfront with me. I'm 5.5 years older than him and was definitely in a place where I was looking to settled down with 'my person'. He said he was open to both and I said that if things ever worked out between us, I'd be open to moving since he was working on turning his family's land into a farm & campground and I could theoretically teach anywhere (more on that decision in another post).

The end of March arrived and I went to visit Farmer Man for the first time. We were both a bit nervous because we had only spent 1.25 days together and hadn't seen each other in about 6 weeks. But, we had a great time together and made plans to see each other again the following month. At that point, I'm not sure either of us knew what was going to happen between us since dating long distance is complicated, we just knew that we liked being together and spending time together so we continued to make plans to see one another over the next several months.

Our first photo together, on a ship at Jamestown during my first visit to see Farmer Man

Long weekend in Rhode Island

By the beginning of June, we decided that I'd spend my summer vacation in Virginia so we could spend more than just a long weekend together once a month. It would be our 'make it or break it' trial period to see what the future would bring for us. At the end of the summer, we would either decide to end things or we would decide we were in it for the long haul, having to endure long distance for a whole school year as neither of us were ready for me to move that first summer but I couldn't up and move in the middle of a school year so if we stayed together, we would have to wait until the next summer for me to move.

With Baby Daisy on the farm last summer

Camping with my Farmer Man

The summer months went by quickly and by the end of August, we were both 'all in' and knew we wanted to be together. I went back to Maine to start my 15th year teaching and Farmer Man stayed in Virginia. It was really tough to go back to long distance dating after spending every day together for two months. We talked on the phone every day but some days/weeks were really tough to be apart. Our communication styles are very different, which made staying connected pretty difficult at times. We've been asked what the 'secret' is to making it through a long distance relationship and both of us agree there really isn't one- it pretty much sucks and the only way through is a common commitment to the end goal- which is the day that you will actually be together without any distance between you.

Suffolk, Virginia Peanut Festival

With my very handsome wedding date

(I officiated the wedding of my very good friends)

Our first Thanksgiving together at my home in Maine

The only photo we got of our first Christmas, waiting for our flight from Maine to Virginia in the Portland Jetport

Celebrated our anniversary in February and went back to the restaurant where it all started!

For the next 10 months, we saw each other about every 4 weeks, give or take, me going to Virginia or him coming up to Maine, spending holidays together with our families, spending time with each others friends. We knew for sure that I would move at the end of the school year and we knew that we wanted to be engaged before that happened...turns out, not only would we be engaged but we would be MARRIED before I moved that summer!

Up Next...

A LOVE STORY PART 4: An Engagement

Read PART 1 HERE & PART 2 HERE

A Love Story Part 2: Unexpected Double Date

2019-08-15T09:48:00.003-04:00

Part 1 of my "love story" was all about single life and this post is the next chapter, how I met the guy who would become my husband! Here goes...

Shortly after I ordered 100 calling cards in an attempt to shake up my dating routine, I got back on a few dating apps, including Tinder. If I'm being honest, my time on that app was mostly unpleasant, filled with many guys who did not seem genuine and didn't share the same reasons for being on the app as me. Still, I just looked at it as a numbers game- the sheer number of people using the app meant eventually I'd match with someone interested in developing a relationship. I had met nice, sincere guys on dating apps before so I knew it was possible, I just had to wade through all the crude photos and people just looking for hookups (no judgements of those who use the app for that purpose, it just wasn't what I was looking for, to each their own...but word to the wise, fellas, no lady wants to see unsolicited pics of your junk...but that's another post entirely).

One Friday evening at the start of school vacation in February 2018, I was mindlessly swiping on Tinder when I came across the profile of a cute, interesting guy with not a shirtless selfie in sight- such a novelty!! When reading his profile, I learned he was from Virginia and almost didn't swipe right (right= I like him, left= no thanks). Lots of people come to Maine for vacation and I wasn't interested in starting anything with someone who didn't live near me and in my experience, the people coming from out of state and using Tinder were usually looking for something casual. But, this farmer/beekeeper/world traveler from Virginia seemed intriguing so I made the fateful decision to "swipe right" and we matched (which means he "swiped right" on my profile as well).

(one of Farmer Man's online profile pics...that smile!!!)

We ended up chatting on the app for about 20 minutes that evening, where he told me he was in Maine for an annual ice fishing trip with a high school buddy and would be going up North for the rest of the weekend. I said goodnight and honestly didn't think it would go any further than that conversation. Still, the next day I decided to send one last message (knowing he probably didn't have cell service where he was and I probably wouldn't hear from him for a few days if at all) suggesting we meet up for dinner or drinks when he was back in southern Maine.

To my pleasant surprise, a few days later he sent me a message and we made plans for a dinner date. He asked if he could bring his friend with him since it was his last night in Maine and he didn't want to ditch him. Normally, I would never have bothered to go out with a guy who lived so far away and who wanted to bring his friend along (kind of awkward), all on a weekday evening BUT I was on February break and something in my gut just told me to go for it! What did I have to lose?

*This is the part where I advocate for safe dating practices so I will point out that we met in a very public restaurant and I was sure to tell some close friends where I was going and who I was meeting and sent screen shots of his profile information.

I got to the restaurant first, as I always tried to do when going on a first date, and sat down at a table facing the door. Then came the nervous waiting to see if the person in the profile was the same in real life. In walked Farmer Man, his friend, and luckily his friend's girlfriend, which would even us out and turn it into a little double date! My first thought was how handsome Farmer Man was and that he looked just like his photos (apparently he thought the exact same thing about me and his friend jokingly commented "as advertised" after he saw me in person, ha ha)!

(the local of our double date)

The four of us had a really great time and I just remember laughing a lot that evening and thinking even if this went nowhere, I had had a really fun date! Farmer Man walked me out to my car, kissed me goodnight, and said "I know I'm supposed to go back to Virginia tomorrow but if I stay another day, will you go out with me again?". Luckily, this gal was on vacation from school and had a pretty open schedule so we made plans for another date in Portland the following day.

We spent all day together, walking around the Old Port, hitting up museums, window shopping, eating & drinking, and just getting to know each other. Although it was February in Maine, we had a rare 70 degree day, which only added to the awesomeness of the experience! I told him about the calling cards I had made and pulled one out to show him. He took it and laughed, seemingly impressed with my creativity, then put it in his wallet (where it still lives today). Even though we met online, I still believe those calling cards played a little part in helping him fall in love with me!

When he finally left to drive back home to Virginia, I remember crying and wondering why this awesome guy was sent into my life and yet he lived so far away! Little did I know it then but my life was about to change in bigger ways than I could have imagined. I'm so happy I said yes to a double date with three strangers on a cold winter Maine evening!

Up Next:
A Love Story Part 3: Long Distance Relationship

A Love Story Part 1: The Single Life

2019-08-11T20:13:00.000-04:00

Last month, at 38 and a half years old, I got married. I wasn't sure if real, long-lasting love was in the cards for me. By nature, I'm a pretty independent and industrious person, happily going through my twenties and thirties, building a successful teaching career, tackling ventures in house flipping/renovating, and maintaining an active social life with a wonderful group of friends. I felt accomplished in many respects but also felt the longing to build a life and a family with a loving, devoted partner. Being in a relationship and wanting marriage and children is not for everyone, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with being single, but I've always hoped for the former.

To that end, I actively put myself out into the dating world for 20+ years, going on more first and second dates than I can count. Blind date fix-ups through friends, well-intentioned co-workers offering up their male relatives, online dating before it was popular or mainstream, and eventually hopping on board the 'swipe left/right' apps, all in the hopes of finding 'the one'. During that span there were a couple of relationships but for most of my life I've been single. As frustrating as it was to be the perpetual third wheel or to have yet another fruitless first date that wouldn't end up going anywhere, in retrospect I can see that being single for so long allowed me to accomplish so much on my own, providing a great sense of pride and accomplishment. Silver linings all around.

(One of my most fun and exciting accomplishments,

the cover of Maine Women Magazine's DIY issue)

Still, there were many times that I was fearful that I'd spend my life alone. I heard many times "I can't believe you are single" and "just give him another chance" and "you should go out with my friend's cousin's roommate from college because he's single too", as well as so many pieces of advice. One person would tell me to put myself out there more while another would tell me to "just stop looking and then you'll find him when you least expect it"...two completely contradictory, yet well-meaning pieces of advice.

I was told many times that I was being too picky, but in my gut I always just felt that I'd know it when I found it, as cliche as that may sound. As with most important decisions in life, but particularly when it comes to spending your life with someone, settling for anything less that what you feel is right for you and that is anything less than what you deserve will never end well. I was never looking for "perfect" in a partner but I was looking for someone who was perfect for me- which are two very different ideas. As much as it hurt sometimes to be alone, settling because I was afraid of being alone was just never an option for me.

In the fall of 2017 I went through a break up and subsequently a depression. It wasn't that particular guy that I was so upset about but rather that residual fear that I was going to spend my life alone. On top of that, I was about to turn 37, which can be troubling for any single woman who would like to try and have biological children. I had a rough couple of months, but after allowing myself to wallow a bit, I rang in New Year's 2018 with a commitment to work on my physical and emotional health and take active steps to pull myself out of my funk. I worked out faithfully, ate well, filled my social calendar, talked to a therapist, started journaling & meditating, planned a solo vacation, and found comfort in the company of dear friends.

During this time one of my friends encouraged me to read a really inspiring book called "The Universe Has Your Back" by Gabrielle Bernstein. In it she asks you to picture what your life would be like if you lived from a place of faith rather than a place of fear. That idea became my mantra and by mid-February I was feeling so good- strong, happy, and optimistic.

After taking a few months off from the dating apps while I worked on "me", I decided to put myself back out there. I even designed and printed 100 'calling cards' (very Victorian, I know) so that if I saw someone interesting while I was out, I could hand him a card with my contact information. I figured I had nothing to lose and a creative strategy for meeting people couldn't hurt! Little did I know then but I would only end up giving out one card to one guy- and that guy would eventually become my husband (we met on an app but he got the one and only card on our first date)!

(the front of the calling cards I designed)

Click here to read Part 2 of this love story!

Why I Love Teaching Financial Literacy

2019-02-25T13:13:00.001-05:00

Six years ago my department leader came to me and asked if I’d be willing to take on the challenge
of creating the curriculum for a new semester course in personal finance that all seniors would need
to take before graduating. As any educator knows, teaching a new course can be daunting because
many hours will be devoted to finding, creating, and implementing quality curriculum. My department
leader buttered me up a bit by saying she thought I had the ‘creativity and energy’ needed to get kids
excited about financial literacy- so how could I say no to that? As it turns out, six years and 12 semesters
later, teaching financial literacy has been one of the best experiences I could have wanted as an
educator, and here’s why:

Teaching Practical Skills is Rewarding

As much as I enjoy teaching U.S. history or other topics that fall under the umbrella of ‘social studies’
there’s just something incredibly satisfying about being able to teach practical, hands on skills that I
KNOW my students will use immediately. I’ve never heard ‘when will I use this’ or ‘why do we have to
know this’ from any student in my personal finance classes, no small feat coming from a room full of
(sometimes) ornery teenagers! They can use the skills learned in class immediately in their everyday
lives and when I receive messages from former students who tell me they are using the information
learned in class out in the ‘real world’, it’s incredibly rewarding.

Personal Finance is Fun and Engaging

The topic of financial literacy allows for incredible engagement from students because most are already
earning and managing their finances to some extent. They naturally have lots of questions during class
and genuinely want to know more about each topic presented, which is such an exciting opportunity as
their teacher to build upon that natural curiosity. Whether it’s creating a real budget based on their
current earnings, participating in an ‘apartment renting’ simulation, or trying to guess ‘name brand or
store brand’ during a taste test activity, teaching personal finance also allows for so many fun and
engaging lesson ideas.

Financial Literacy Improves the Community

With student loan debt now in the trillions and financial literacy skills on the decline, it’s now more
important than ever to have quality financial literacy courses in every community. When students learn
how to make smart decisions with their finances, understand the consequences of various financial
decisions, and see the ‘big picture’ of how individual choices can also impact the community on a
broader scale, we all benefit from this increased knowledge of personal finance. My students take what
they’ve learned in class and bring it home to their families, engaging in meaningful conversations about
smart financial choices. As a financial literacy educator, it’s rewarding to know that I am making a
difference in not only the lives of my students, but inadvertently working toward improving the economic
climate in both my local and broader communities.

Self-Improvement Opportunities Abound

I can honestly say that teaching, in general, makes me a more patient, more knowledgeable, and more
well-rounded person. Having the opportunity to teach financial literacy has made a difference in the
management of my own finances. Being asked to teach this course has required that I do a great deal
of research, inevitably improving my own understanding of a wide variety of financial topics. Providing
the best quality education I can for my students has also given me opportunities to hear from a variety
of community members, from investment bankers to insurance agents, each experts in their own fields.
When my students don’t understand something or have questions to which I don’t know the answer, I
expand my knowledge base once again by finding the answers and engaging in meaningful
conversations. I’m constantly being given opportunities to learn and grow by teaching personal finance.

To any teacher who may be presented with the opportunity to teach personal finance classes, I would emphatically say ‘DO IT’!! Although it may seem daunting at first, you will be a better person for it and your students and community will thank you!

Useful & Fun Gift Idea: The Nixplay Digital Photo Frame

2018-12-03T10:35:00.000-05:00

Confession: I have a problem...there are currently over 15,000 photos on my iPhone! Gasp!! Many of these should be deleted but I also have so many great photos from trips, family gatherings, and outings with friends that I never look at because they are lost somewhere amongst the thousands of photos my phone. Although I have every intention of printing and displaying the photos, somehow, this always falls low on my priority list.

Enter the Nixplay Digital Photo Frame- this handy little device has truly changed the way I display my favorite photos and memories and has brought so much joy into my daily life!

The Nixplay frame looks like a regular photo frame (I chose the 8-inch 'Iris' frame in 'peach copper' and it also comes in two other metallic finishes) but unlike a regular frame, the photos in the Nixplay frame continuously change, allowing you to view all of your favorite memories, digitally!

Using the Nixplay app on my phone, I can organize my photos into specific albums or just a general mix and then send the photos from my phone directly to the frame over WiFi. I have my frame in my living room where I'm able to see all my photos while sitting on my couch...I absolutely love being able to relive memories everyday when otherwise, the photos would rarely be seen and would never leave my iPhone! It's also a fun conversation piece when I have visitors.

Another great feature of the Nixplay frame is that you can share photos with family and friends through the Nixplay smartphone app. This means you can send photos to other peoples' frames, and they can send photos to yours- a really fun and functional feature! How many grandparents do you know who would love to see new photos of their kids and grandkids pop up daily in their photo frame? Or how about friend groups who live all over the country? Everyone can share photos from anywhere!

The frame plugs into a regular outlet and has a remote with settings that change the speed of the photos, which albums will be played, and it also turns the frame on and off. Each photo adjusts to the frame as it's displayed so you don't have to worry about whether the photo is landscape/portrait or a specific size- it will automatically adjust the size to best fit whichever way you've displayed the frame.

Finally, one of my most favorite parts of the Nixplay frame is that it has allowed me to easily digitize old family photos. For example, my mother recently gave me an album full of family photos and I was able to take pictures of the originals with my iPhone, then easily and quickly display them in my Nixplay frame.

This would be such a great gift idea for anyone- loading in all sorts of old photos so they can see them every day without having to physically have the photo album! How about playing an album of the special birthday boy/girl on the Nixplay frame during the party? The options are endless and I can't think of anyone I know who wouldn't want this frame as both a useful and sentimental gift (myself included)!

Now through December 12th, 2018,

Crafty Teacher Lady readers can use the code KELLY25

to get 25% off the Nixplay Iris Digital Photo frame!

Coastal Inspired Bathroom Renovation

2018-07-06T14:04:00.001-04:00

At the start of this year my cousin and his girlfriend purchased their very first property- a multi-family home with three apartments. They already had renters in the bottom two units but would be renovating and moving into the third unit. As an avid home renovator, I was thrilled for them and proud they were ready to tackle this huge undertaking all by themselves!

Around the same time, Allure Flooring reached out and asked if I'd be interested in a collaboration. As I had already used their vinyl plank flooring in my own bathroom renovation and LOVED the product, I decided that I would design a new bathroom for my cousin's house, featuring the same flooring!

Their house was originally built in the early 1900s, but had been somewhat updated in the decades after, although it was now in need of further updating. The flooring in the bathroom was linoleum made to look like tile. It also had an outdated vanity and light fixtures. They decided to gut the entire bathroom, except for the tub which was in decent shape, including ripping up the flooring and putting up new drywall.

Using my favorite mood board app, Morpholio, I put together a design board for their bathroom, inspired by the colors and textures of the coast. The design included painting the walls in a pretty seagreen/gray paint called 'Sea Salt' by Sherwin Williams and adding horizontal beadboard on two walls (4'x8' sheets from Home Depot). The vanity was actually a Facebook Marketplace find that we got for a steal because it had a couple of minor paint chips. They removed one of the doors and took it to Home Depot to get a sample paint jar in a matching color for touch ups!

(sources are linked below)

Now let's get to the flooring! When I renovated my bathroom last year, I wanted a product for the floors that looked like wood but was water resistant and durable. After doing A LOT of research, I chose Allure Ultra Luxury Vinyl Plank Flooring in 'Durban Oak'. I love the color because it's the perfect medium shade (not too light and not too dark) and looks great with a variety of decor options. After a year and a half of use, it has held up amazingly well and still looks as good as it did the day it was installed! It's also really easy to clean, which is a bonus!

In addition to the durability, the other great part about this type of flooring is that it's so easy to install! My cousin's girlfriend installed the vinyl planking in their bathroom all by herself in a day without any previous renovation experience! The 'grip strips' on each plank make installation incredibly fast and simple.

After creating their design board, I linked most items on my Amazon favorites page so they would have lots of affordable options when decorating the space. If they didn't buy directly from Amazon, they had a template to use when out searching for similar items. Here is the finished result, including beautiful new flooring:

When I first walked into the space after they were finished renovating, I was so impressed! They did such a great job following the design board and certainly had such a feeling of accomplishment from tackling this renovation all by themselves!

Sources to Recreate this Coastal Look:

Flooring- Allure Ultra Luxury Vinyl Plank Flooring in Durban Oak

Paint Color- Sherwin Williams 'Sea Salt'

Vanity- purchased off the Facebook Marketplace but similar options can be found here and here.

Shower Curtain- Amazon

Beadboard Panels- 4'x8' from Home Depot

Bath Mat- Amazon

Mirror- similar option can be found here
White cabinet options- here and here
Wood Shelves- Amazon
Lighting- my favorite stylish and affordable lighting options can be found here
More of my favorite decor items can be found here

Solo Vacations: Why You Shouldn't Be Afraid to Take One

2018-06-13T13:37:00.001-04:00

"I love to travel!" In my experience, this a sentiment that many people express but fewer actually take the initiative to plan a trip. Money, time off of work, family obligations, or fear of leaving the comforts of home are usually the reasons that hold many back. For me, it was lack of a travel companion (for all of the reasons just mentioned) that was making me hesitant to take the trips that I'd always wanted to take. But why, exactly, was I reluctant to travel alone? Was I afraid I'd be unsafe? Was I afraid to dine alone? Was I afraid I'd be bored without anyone to talk to? After asking myself these questions I realized, that with proper planning, there really wasn't any actual legitimate reason I couldn't or shouldn't travel alone!

I've been lucky enough to have traveled extensively over the years and have taken some smaller road trips within the country by myself, but had yet to travel internationally alone. A few months ago I decided it was necessary for my mental health to escape the long, cold New England winter by heading somewhere tropical over April break. I was also looking forward to having some time to read, relax, and recharge away from my house and the never ending project 'to do' lists! So, I booked my first solo international trip to the Dominican Republic!

The Logistics
All-inclusive
Book ground transportation in advance
Look for a small resort

One of my colleagues mentioned she had booked a trip for her family to the Bahamas through Cheap Caribbean so I decided to take a look there as well. Because I was traveling solo, I wanted to stay somewhere all inclusive so I didn't have to leave the resort for every meal or really for anything at all. I ended up finding a great deal that included roundtrip airfare, lodging, food and drinks at the VH Gran Ventana Beach Resort in the Dominican Republic. When booking the trip, Cheap Caribbean also had the option of paying for transportation from the airport to the resort. I would highly recommend this as it took away any of the uncertainty of trying to arrange ground transportation and traveling alone while in a foreign country. As soon as I left the airport, the transportation company had clearly marked signs and I took a small van with a few others vacationers to our respective resorts. It was really easy, safe, and seamless!

The resort itself was the perfect place for a solo traveler. It was small, which made it feel safe both during the day and at night because I didn't have to walk a long distance to access the beach, the pool area, or the dining room/restaurants. I spent most mornings on the beach, then after lunch, headed for the pool! There was entertainment at the resort each night, which was right next to the main pool area so again, I didn't have to walk far alone at night! Choosing a safe place to stay (be sure to read lots of reviews) and planning your transportation in advance will alleviate some of the hesitation/fear that comes with traveling alone.

The People
Vacationers are friendly
Book excursions early

Whenever I've traveled alone, there are usually so many opportunities to meet and connect with other people. I have found this to be true on any of the solo trips or outings I've taken. It seems that people on vacation are usually very excited and interested in hanging out with people from all over the world- chatting about where people are from and usually finding lots of commonalities. My trip to the Dominican Republic proved to be no exception as I met lots of people from all over. There was the woman from the Bronx who was sharing the shuttle bus to the resort, a mother-daughter duo who I ran into all over the resort throughout the week, the couple I met on an excursion who actually live in the next town over from me in Maine (I'm telling you, it's such a small world), a group from Germany who I hung out with at the pool, and even a group of teachers from Canada, one of whom recognized me because she follows me on Instagram and happened to be staying at the exact same resort!!

Booking excursions is a great way to meet other people as you are usually put into a small group and are sort of 'forced' to talk! It's even a great idea to take an excursion toward the start of your trip because you could end up meeting a group of people you can then hang out with the rest of the week, if you so choose! I met another woman who was traveling solo who ended up hanging out with a group from Canada for most of the week as they were all on an excursion together and were staying at the same resort. I took a city tour of Puerto Plata part way through the trip and met some really fun people! So, while you may think you'll feel lonely if you travel alone, you will most likely meet more people than you could imagine, some of whom may become life-long friends and travel buddies!

The Benefits of Solitude
Set your own agenda
Build confidence
Reconnect with yourself

While it's great to meet new people while traveling and it's always fun to take a trip with friends and loved ones, one of the benefits of solo travel is you are free to make your own agenda and can elect to NOT talk to or meet other people as well! I decided when I wanted to eat, when I wanted to skip out on the evening entertainment and go to sleep early, what excursions I most wanted to take, and whether I wanted to be on the beach or poolside...I made my own agenda with no one to please but myself!

When I told my students I was taking this trip alone, many expressed that they could never do that because the thought of dining alone and having others 'judge' them was too embarrassing (I think they may have some negative school cafeteria experiences)?! I feel like many adults let the fear of being judged by others hold them back from experiences as well. Why not dine alone? Why not travel alone? In my experience, most people aren't feeling pity for you they are actually envious and impressed with the choice to travel and experience life solo! In fact, whenever I told my colleagues and friends about my solo trip to the Dominican, almost all of them were like "What? That's awesome! Good for you...I'm totally jealous!!" Not a direct quote, but the sentiment was usually the same nonetheless.

Most people who I met while on vacation assumed I was there 'with my husband' (which I guess maybe I should take as a compliment?). I would just politely correct them (or sometimes just nod politely) and go about my business! Dining alone was no problem...I even met a stray cat who I fed some delicious mahimahi (true story)! The other diners were not judging me, in fact I'd say it's pretty narcissistic to think that in a dining room full of 100+ people, any of them were paying attention to me, so there's really no need to feel self-conscious. In fact, dining and traveling alone only builds self-confidence!

The other benefit of taking a trip alone is time to read, reflect, and do some things to feed your soul. I chose a variety of books (self-help, memoirs, and fiction) all of which offered introspection and relaxation. I watched the sunset, fell asleep to the sound of crashing waves, and reflected on the goals and dreams I have for my life. I'm not sure one has as much time to do these things when traveling with others. Solitude offers a unique opportunity for calm and connection with oneself.

As I was posting stories from my Dominican vacation on Instagram, I received so many messages from women asking if I was traveling alone (not in a creepy way but more in an inquisitive way), then expressing that they had always wanted to do the same but felt too nervous to do so. I'm truly hoping that you've read this post and will feel confident and inspired to book that solo trip! With some proper planning (or even no planning but just winging it if you're brave like some of my super adventurous friends), the willingness to strike up some conversations with new people, and the desire to reconnect with yourself, you'll end your trip with lots of new memories and certainly feeling a new sense of confidence! What are you waiting for??

Teaching Financial Literacy Part 3: Lesson Ideas

2018-05-09T17:55:00.000-04:00

This is the third and final post in a series I've written about teaching financial literacy in the secondary classroom. PART 1 gave an overview of the units in the semester course I teach and PART 2 is a list of helpful financial resources for students in the classroom and beyond. I've been asked to present a workshop at the Maine Jump$tart Coalition "Fostering Financial Literacy in Maine Schools" conference, which provided just the motivation I needed to finish this post!

Today I've put together what I hope will be a helpful compilation of my favorite assessments & activities that I've actually used in my classroom! I've created many of the items below from scratch, and as such they are really tailored to my units and my students. Teachers, you can download the items via the links provided and amend them to suit your needs (they are saved as Word documents as it's what was easiest for me). These resources are for personal classroom use only and shouldn't be sold. If they are linked or shared, please give credit! Be kind and thoughtful people!

PROJECT BASED ASSESSMENTS

Budget Project:

Students are asked to create a budget based on a minimum wage income. They must apply concepts we've learned throughout our budgeting unit to calculate their monthly net income, find an apartment within their budget, and grocery shop and meal plan with healthy food options. If the point of minimum wage is to live a 'decent life', one should be able to find a decent place to live and eat healthy foods on that income. This project leads to a lot of great discussions about life on minimum wage. The project descriptor can be found here.

Identify Theft Public Service Announcements:
This group project asks students to first research some common methods thieves use to steal identities then create a short PSA video. The projector descriptor can be found here.

Consumer Savings Flyers:
Students are asked to research ways consumers can save money on their everyday expenses. I've broken the research topics into four categories, dividing up the students so they aren't all choosing the same topics to research. Students then create flyers with main ideas and elaborate on their ideas in a voice recording formatted into a QR code and placed on their flyers. They walk around and listen to one another's flyers, getting tips on how to save money! The project can be found here.

KINESTHETIC ACTIVITIES
Egg Hunt Trivia:
This can really be used with any topic and any subject. Place vocabulary terms on slips of paper and put inside plastic eggs. Hide the eggs around the classroom and watch your students go crazy! Once they all have eggs, have them open and provide the definition for the term before claiming their prize.

Name Brand vs Store Brand Taste Test:
Within our budgeting unit I do a lesson on whether or not it's worth it to spend extra money on name brand items instead of store/generic brands. I show a slideshow with some overview information on why there's a price difference and then we do a taste test. Students walk around the room tasting the name brand and the store brand versions of various foods and guess which is which, also denoting if they really had a preference or could taste any difference. We also discuss the fact that many generic medicines and cosmetics have the exact same ingredients as their name brand counterparts. The worksheet I have the students use for this activity can be found here.

DISCUSSION BASED ASSESSMENTS
Minimum Wage Socratic Seminar
This is a great discussion based assessment that asks students to use knowledge from lessons throughout our money management unit to prep for a Socratic seminar (student led discussion). Students conduct research on the pros and cons of raising the minimum wage and we also watch the 'Minimum Wage' episode of the docu-series '30 Days'. The assessment descriptor can be found here and the Socratic guide can be found here.

Ivory Tower Socratic Seminar
At the end of our 'Funding your Future' unit, students watch the film Ivory Tower about our nation's post secondary college system and asks 'is college worth it'? Students then prep for a Socratic seminar by completing this response guide.

Financial Qs Speed Dating Activity
For this activity students sit in two rows facing one another and randomly choose a question out of a bowl in front of each pair. They have about two minutes (or however long you want to give them) to discuss the question before one row of students gets up and moves one seat over, facing a new partner. Then a new question is chosen by each pair and they discuss. Repeat! The questions I use can be found here.

Financial Interview
At the start of the semester, I ask students to interview an adult about their experiences with money and finances. After they've all completed the interviews, I have them share the responses on chart paper all around the room (one piece for each question). If someone has already written a similar idea, students are asked to put check marks next to the idea, which helps us visually see the most popular and similar responses amongst all of the interviewees. This is a great activity for setting up the important financial literacy skills we will learn throughout the semester. The interview questions I use can be found here. Please note, I also teach a 'citizenship' unit in this course, so a few questions pertain to that topic.

FUN & ENGAGING ACTIVITIES
Valentine's Day Romance Scams
On Valentine's Day this year I did a lesson on the most common types of 'romance scams' and how to avoid them. We read a couple articles and also watched a few YouTube clips from the Dr. Phil show on of unfortunate people who were victims of such scams. Next year I may have students create their own Valentine's cards featuring common romance scams and then have them give the cards out to their classmates! The video about romance scams can be found here and the article we read can be found here.

Dave Ramsey Video Roulette
When we have extra time, we like to go on YouTube and watch clips from the Dave Ramsey Show. I let the students vote on which clips they want to view next from the 'suggested videos' that pop up on the side bar. It's a fun way to hear a variety of financial issues as well as Dave's no nonsense advice!

Online Simulations
Two online simulations that my students love to play are SPENT and PAYBACK. The first challenges students to make it through the month without going broke after having lost their job/home and tackling all the challenges life can send their way. The latter asks students to make a variety of financial choices as they navigate their way through college. We usually play both of these simulations as a class because it's fun to discuss which choices they want to make and why (majority vote determines which choice is made).

NextGen Personal Finance 'Budgeting with Roommates'
NGPF is one of my favorite resources for lessons and activities and a favorite of my students' is their budgeting with roommates activity. Students work in small groups and each take on a fictitious persona as they try to collectively make decisions about who will take which room, pay which bill, and create a workable and fair plan for living together. They have so much fun with this activity and I love listening to their discussions and rational for the choices they make!

Unique Scholarships 'Oprah Moment'
Who can forget the moment Oprah gave a car to every member of her studio audience?! Well, I don't have that kind of budget to work with, however, during our unit on the cost of college I print off a whole bunch of unique and unusual scholarships onto small slips of paper, then tape the pieces of paper under each seat in my classroom. In the middle of my lesson on financial aid, I tell the students they've all "won" a scholarship (make sure the use appropriate air quotes) and ask them to look under their chairs. They each take turns reading and sharing the weird scholarships they "won". It's a fun and silly way to break up the lesson and to reinforce the idea that there really are so many scholarships out there for just about everyone! The scholarship list can be found here.

Teaching financial literacy can be so much fun and really offers a lot of opportunity to be creative and ask your students to apply what they're learning in a variety of ways! As always, if you'd like to keep up with my daily adventures in teaching and home renovating, you can find me on Instagram @craftyteacherlady!

Home Renovation Update: 1 Year Later

2018-02-04T16:07:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's already been a year since I moved into my fixer upper! In some ways, the house has completely transformed and yet there still seems to be so many little 'to do' items left on the list (like installing baseboard trim, changing out all the brass door knobs and hinges, and replacing the outlet and radiator covers). The bigger projects completed included a new kitchen, new half and full bathrooms, refinished hardwood floors upstairs, new laminate installed throughout the main floor, new lighting, and new paint inside and out. I hope to write separate posts with more details for each room in the house like I did for the master bedroom-the first room to actually be completed so I could have at least one pretty, comfortable, renovation-free place to seek respite while the rest of the house was in shambles. For now, here are a few transformation photos of each room to mark this special one-year renovation anniversary! You can find many of the items seen in the 'after' photos on my Amazon Favorites page. Hopefully this makes it easier to 'shop my house'!

The Kitchen/Dining Room

What was once two separate spaces, the kitchen and dining room became one when a wall was removed. This not only opened up the space for entertaining, it also allowed for more light in the kitchen since the dining room has three large windows.

The Living Room

This is the room that really 'sold' me on this house. I saw so much potential in the fireplace and built-ins. It's a large room, great for entertaining, but somehow it also feels cozy. The biggest transformation was definitely painting the fireplace and adding faux shiplap to the walls. Wall color in this room is Repose Gray by Sherwin Williams.

The Bathrooms

Both the full bath and the downstairs half bath were complete gut jobs from floor to ceiling. Wood plank walls & beadboard were added as well as new vanities and lighting. Both rooms still need some finish work, including caulking, painting, trim and replacing the radiator covers. Vanities are the 'Newport' Home Decorators Collection from Home Depot. I've also found a similar option here.

Half Bath

Master Bedroom

As I mentioned above, I set to work on the master bedroom right away because I wanted at least one finished space while the renovation chaos was happening in the rest of the house. Wall color is Window Pane by Sherwin Williams. Head on over to this post to see more photos and details of this space.

Guest Room

This house actually has 4 bedrooms so I have lots of space for two dedicated guest rooms and a craft room! I've only decorated one guest room so far...the wall color is one of my all time favorites- Sea Salt by Sherwin Williams. I also incorporated a lot of antique and thrifted finds in this room!

Craft Room

Although I plan to add a fun rug, install the radiator covers, and actually arrange the gallery wall (rather than just randomly throwing in some frames I already had), my craft room is coming along quite nicely! Both the table and dresser were thrifted finds that I repainted and I also painted and reupholstered the chair from a thrifted find! The wall color is Repose Gray by Sherwin Williams.

Exterior Projects

The outside of the house was painted in Pussywillow by Sherwin Williams with a minty blue color for the doors called Palladian Blue by Benjamin Moore. While I really wanted to add a farmer's porch to the front, it just wasn't in the budget. I did have the front door replaced and added new moldings around the doors. The lighting on the exterior was also updated from brass to galvanized barn lights. Those small changes were relatively inexpensive ways to improve the overall curb appeal. I have plans to paint the concrete front steps as well as the covered side entrance porch. But, those project will have to wait for warmer weather!

Looking back on all of these 'before' photos reminds me just how far we've come...and by 'we' I mean both the house and myself. In this house I've tackled so many new projects that I had never done before including building custom pantry shelves, installing a plank wall, and attempting to refinish hardwood floors (it did not go well...but I'll save that for another post)! I feel a tremendous sense of accomplishment whenever I tackle something new, and I think that's why I enjoy renovating so much. I also really enjoy the creative process of seeing past the mess and envisioning how to turn a house into a home! I can't wait to see what this place looks like in another year!

Catch me over on Instagram to see what project I'm currently tackling!

Stylish and Affordable Lighting Options

2018-02-04T11:45:00.000-05:00

It's been one year since moving into my little fixer upper and in that time, A LOT of decisions have been made. There were flooring choices, paint colors, bathroom fixtures and of course, lighting. Since the entire house was/is being renovated, I spent a lot of time searching for stylish but affordable light fixtures. I ended up purchasing most of my lights from Amazon because I found they had a wide variety of options at budget-friendly prices!

My aesthetic is sort of a combination of "industrial-meets-vintage-meets-farmhouse" so in other words, pretty eclectic! I wasn't afraid to mix metals, either, so I've got a combination of brushed nickel, flat black, and galvanized metals throughout the house.

Most of the lights I ended up purchasing were flush mount or semi-flush mount since I had relatively low ceilings. Below is a roundup of some of my favorite light fixture finds. Click on the numbers below to take you directly to each source!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

If you'd like to see more frequent home renovation posts, please feel free to check me out on Instagram! You can also shop some of the favorite items in my house on my 'favorites' page!
Happy Renovating!

Teaching Financial Literacy Part 2: Financial Resources

2017-08-14T12:44:00.001-04:00

This is the second post in my 'Teaching Financial Literacy' series and today I'd like to address my former personal finance students! You can also listen to a podcast interview where I address my experiences teaching personal finance HERE!

Hey Kids,

Do remember when you were in SPFC (Senior Personal Finance & Citizenship) and didn't know if you'd ever use the information we were learning? Well, many of you have reached out to me since you've graduated and are now in the 'real world', navigating this 'adulting' thing! You've shared your successes with me (renting your first place, voting, opening up a checking account) and have also asked me to provide a list of resources we used in class! This post is for YOU! And just like I wrote on the last page of your final exam, "I'M ROOTING FOR YOU"! Keep in touch!

Sincerely,

Miss Rush

FINANCIAL LITERACY RESOURCES
Practical Money Skills (Helpful Financial Calculators)
If you are thinking about buying a car, taking out a loan, saving for a big-ticket item, or want to compare interest rates, this is my FAVORITE source to play around with various calculators.

Better Money Habits Videos (Great Refresher Videos)
These videos from Bank of America in partnership with Khan Academy provide a great overview of a variety of financial topics. Watch them to refresh your memory on the various topics we covered in class!

Dave Ramsey's Budget Calculator
I'm sure you remember using Dave's spending categories and percentages when creating budgets in class! Here's a link to his budget calculator (you will have to create an account but it's free). You can also download the 'EveryDollar' app to create a budget on your phone!

Federal Trade Commission (Consumer Protection)
As you may remember, you are entitled to a FREE credit report check from each of the three main credit reporting agencies once per year. On this site you can find the link to access your credit report and well as information about reporting identify theft and protecting yourself from fraud!

Consumer Financial Protection Bureau
Along the same lines as the resource above, this website from the federal government has resources to help protect you as a consumer (as the title indicates)!

FAME (Finance Authority of Maine)
A great resource about paying for college, filling out the FAFSA, and general money management from a Maine organization.

College Scorecard (Comparing College Data)
This is the resource we used when comparing net price, average loan payment, graduation rates, etc. of various colleges. If you are trying to find the best 'bang for your buck' and want to see how your school compares to others, use this interactive website!

Maine Snap-Ed (Healthy Eating on a Budget)

If you’re looking for recipe ideas and shopping lists to stretch your grocery budget, this resource will provide just that! It IS possible to eat healthy while pinching your pennies- a great resource at any stage of life!

(name brand vs store brand taste test activity)

(listening to & reading student 'consumer savings tips' projects)

CIVIC RESOURCES

Do Something.Org (Volunteer Opportunities)
Although not personal finance related, I feel compelled to link up this really great resources to help further your civic mindedness and encourage you to get out there and make a difference in your community (wherever that may be at this point)! Simply input how much time you have and some of your interests and a list of volunteer opportunities in your area will be created!

Voting Information for Maine Residents
I'm not sure where you may be living at this point, but this is the resource we used in class for determining who is eligible to vote and where to vote if you are living in Maine. If you are out of state, go to your state's website and to find similar information.

Political Typology Quiz (Pew Research Center)
This is the quiz you took on your own to help you determine where your views fall on various social and economic issues. The Pew Research Center is a non-partisan website...do you remember what 'non-partisan' means? :)

(field trip to listen to the Maine gubernatorial debate in Portland)

The information above are some of the 'most requested' resources and should provide a great overview of the major topics covered in our personal finance & civics course. There are endless amounts of information on the web to help navigate the world of personal finance but hopefully this list will provide a great place to start!

Thrift Store Teacher Outfit Ideas

2017-08-07T14:52:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite back-to-school traditions is going shopping for 'new' teacher clothes at all of my local Goodwill stores. I take a day and make the rounds to 5 or 6 of my area stores in search of great bargains on stylish & professional outfits! Upon looking through my closet recently, I noticed that at least 50% of my current wardrobe came from thrift stores. I often receive compliments on my outfits from my high school students as well as colleagues, which is proof that you can in fact be stylish and professional without spending a fortune! As a personal finance teacher, thrift shopping has also provided me with a way to demonstrate consumer saving skills to my students! Let's take a peak inside my closet as I offer some thrifty teacher outfit inspiration!

The outfit shown above includes a thrifted eyelet sheath dress and a cardigan, both originally from Old Navy, and paired with a belt and sandals that I already had in my closet (not thrifted). I love to mix thrifted pieces with pieces I already own to create new looks. The sheath dress and the cardigan are both staple pieces that can easily be mixed and matched with other items. Below I've paired the same red sandals with some fun printed pants found at Goodwill!

The outfit above, including the boots, was entirely thrifted at Goodwill! The green sweater from the first outfit was paired again with a cute printed dress and tights. Adding tights or leggings is a great way to transition pieces from warmer months to those dreaded colder winter months! Leggings/tights also help make items that may be on the shorter side a bit more appropriate for school.

My first stop inside any thrift store is the dress section. You really get more 'bang for your buck' with dresses because they are basically an entire outfit in one piece and are often easier to make fit since pants can be a bit tougher to find the right length, size, shape. The polka dot dress above is from LOFT originally but thrifted for $6 and paired with other items already in my closet.

The LOFT sweater dress above was found 'new with tags' at my local thrift store for $6!! Although the blazer wasn't thrifted, I've owned it for over 10 years and it's a great staple piece. I've seen lots of stylish blazers & jackets at Goodwill!

Both striped dress above were Old Navy dresses that were purchased at thrift stores. They make awesome wardrobe staples because they are great transition pieces! Pair with boots on the fall/winter or sandals in the spring/summer! They also make getting dressed in the morning really easy and are school appropriate because they cover up everything without sacrificing style & comfort!

Thrifted J. Crew wool skirt paired with items already in my closet!

Pink printed skirt originally from J. Crew, $5 at Goodwill

Dress originally from Target

It also helps to have some basic sewing skills when thrifting because if you can shorten a hemline on a dress or skirt, you take home more great deals! I'm really short so sewing a straight line with my machine and a basic hem with a needle and thread were essential skills to learn early on. The dress below fit perfectly except in the length which was easily remedied with a hand stitched hem!

(Thrifted LOFT wrap dress)

(Thrifted J. Crew Skirt)

(The entire outfit above including the shoes was thrifted)

I've even found some great evening/formal wear at Goodwill for great prices. The J. Crew silk taffeta dress above retails for over $200 new and I was able to purchase it for $10. The gold Banana Republic shoes were thrifted, too, and I wore this outfit to chaperone prom last year!

The outfit above is more like 'teacher on summer vacation style' but obviously Goodwill has some great pieces for more casual looks, too. The dress makes a great beach cover up and the Cole Haan sandals are one of my all time favorite Goodwill purchases!

(A 'Casual Friday' look featuring a thrifted J. Crew ruffle button down paired

with jeans and some nude pumps)

(Thrifted orange vest and plaid shirt, both from Target)

(Another more casual look above with dark denim jeans, a 'hand me down' sweater from a friend, and thrifted Cole Haan wedges.)

When I'm hunting for thrifted clothes, or really any clothes at all, I also like to purchase items that can be worn both at school and in my 'real life'. All of the thrifted items above could be dressed up or down and even the strapless dress can be paired with a cardigan to make it school appropriate.

(A few of my favorite thrifted items! Cole Haan, LOFT, and even a Chanel jacket!)

Because I've found so many fantastic thrifted items, I find it difficult to go into other clothing stores to pay full retail price. Even the sales prices can't beat the prices I find at the thrift store! With a little bit of patience it is entirely possible to find great brand-name clothing and accessories at a budget-friendly price at the thrift store and you may just end up feeling pretty proud!

I post many of my 'teacher outfits of the day' over on Instagram! I hope to see you there!

Teaching Financial Literacy Part 1: Course Overview

2017-06-19T16:17:00.001-04:00

Summer break is upon us and I finally have time to share something I've been growing increasingly passionate about during the last several years...FINANCIAL LITERACY!

Four years ago my department leader came to me and asked if I'd be interested in teaching a new semester course that all of our senior students would be required to take before graduating. The course would be focused on both financial literacy skills and on civics and I would be tasked with creating the new curriculum. This sounded both daunting and exciting all at once!

That summer I set about gathering resources and doing some research to figure out what exactly the course would cover (Pinterest is a great place to gather ideas). I asked myself what skills I would have wanted to know if I could go back to my late teens/early twenties. I also thought about what skills I DID know that really helped me start my adult life. And so, a new course was born!

I plan on writing a 3-part series about financial literacy in the high school classroom. This first post will focus on providing an overview of the major topics covered in the course. In subsequent posts, I will be sharing a comprehensive list for TEACHERS of the best resources & lessons that I've used with my students & will also be creating a list of resources FOR MY KIDDOS who've already graduated and often email asking for links to some of the resources we've used in class. They want access to these resources now that they are actually out in the 'real world' and applying the knowledge they've learned (most of them don't keep their binders from high school nor do they have access to our Google Classroom page once they've graduated).

Course Overview

One semester can seem like a short time in which to teach all of the financial literacy skills I'd ideally like my students to know (a portion of the course is also dedicated to civic literacy), however, below is a break down of each of the units/topics we do cover. The units also have 'enrichment' topics that help to enhance the basic skills being taught.

1) Money Management

-Budgeting

-Consumer shopping/savings skills

-Understanding a pay stub

-Taxes

-Enrichment topics: living on minimum wage/poverty, wealth distribution, the impact of financial stress on individuals and families

2) Credit

-Credit cards/debit cards

-Credit scores

-Interest rates/minimum payments

-Renting/Buying a home
-Taking out loans

-Enrichment topics: debt of the United States, how the country 'borrows' money, how the debts of citizens impacts the economy

3) Saving & Investing

-Checking/banking skills

-Investment options

-Financial goals

-Enrichment topic: consequences of not saving & investing as individuals

4) Financial Protection

-Insurance options

-Identity theft/fraud

-Consumer protection

5) Funding Your Future

-Comparing various post-secondary choices/options

-How much should one borrow to pay for college?

-Understanding financial aid

-Enrichment topic: discussion/research on the underlying causes of the rise in college tuition costs

Back in April I attended a financial literacy conference hosted by the Maine chapter of the Jump$tart Coalition of Financial Literacy and got some fantastic resources. The BEST resource shared at the conference (in my opinion) is a website for educators looking to teach financial literacy called Next Gen Personal Finance. What I really like about this website is that it's completely free, you don't have to log in or enroll to access the materials, and it's basically a complete financial literacy course broken down by unit with lots of different types of lessons. There are interactive group activities, daily discussion questions, links to videos and simulations, and teacher guides.

Hello?? Where was this resource 4 years ago when I needed it?? Ha ha!

If you are considering teaching or are about to teach financial literacy skills to young people you should absolutely visit the Next Gen website as a place to start. Having taught personal finance for 4 years already, I am thoroughly impressed with the materials they've come up with! It also validated what I've chosen to teach my students because many of the resources I already use are included on their website!

*UPDATE: After writing this post, Tim from Next Gen reached out to me and asked if I wanted to be on his podcast! You can listen to my podcast interview HERE!

(The group of seniors pictured above from one of my personal finance classes VOLUNTARILY came to a financial aid night seminar being offered at a local college. We decided to make a night of it by dining at Olive Garden beforehand! It made my teacher heart happy to see them want to expand upon what we were learning in class for no other reason than to gain more knowledge!)

Teaching financial literacy is incredibly rewarding. I KNOW my students walk away with skills and knowledge they will and have used in their adult lives. I've received lots of feedback from students about how much they've learned in the class and how much more confident they feel about starting their post-secondary lives. Parents also tell me that our activities in class have led to a lot of interesting and important discussions at home with their kids about finances and 'life beyond high school'. It's a wonderful feeling to know that what I am teaching is truly helping my students!

Stay tuned for part 2 of this series where I will be providing a list of great financial literacy resources for my students to use once they've graduated and are in the 'real world'.

In the meantime, find me over on Instagram!

Rustic & Coastal Master Bedroom Makeover

2017-03-06T21:30:00.001-05:00

As my home renovation journey continues, today I'm sharing the first room in the new house to be {just about} finished! My initial goal was to have my master bedroom completed BEFORE actually moving into the house. But, as is the case with most renovations, everything takes far longer than anticipated! I've been squatting in the room next door, eagerly anticipating the day that I could move into my new and improved beautiful bedroom! Let's take a look at the space throughout the renovations...

The first item to tackle was removing the window to the left of the room to make the furniture placement in the space fit a bit better. Since there are two other windows in the room, losing light wasn't an issue! I attempted, in vain, to remove the wall paper but quickly gave up and decided to use a plank board tutorial to cover up the walls instead. My suggestion would be to paint or prime the wall paper BEFORE putting up the boards so that the pattern doesn't show through in the nickel sized gaps... let's just say I learned that lesson the hard way!

Before I painted & decorated the room I created a design board for inspiration. I was going for a 'rustic meets coastal' look in the space with a soft, calming color scheme. The bed pictured above is from Target, although I ended up just using the headboard I already had (also from Target). The paint color I chose is Window Pane from Sherwin Williams.

The ceiling fan was replaced with a low profile light fixture. I LOVE this fixture!! I shopped all around looking for something affordable and rustic-looking. This one IS rustic looking but a bit of a splurge, at least for my budget, but I couldn't be happier as it really adds some interest to the space. The floors were stripped of the worn-down orange stain and then re-stained. That process in itself will wait for another post as we attempted to DIY the floors and it did not end well! I had to bring in the pros...lesson learned!

Are you ready to see the space now that it's all pretty?! Here it is...

{This photo is of my grandmother when she was 16...it's one of my very favorite parts of this space}

I still have some decorative touches to add (like maybe some framed art above the bed and something on top of the dresser) and need to finish organizing the closet spaces, but I really could not be happier with how things turned out! The rug, ceiling fixture, and side lamps are all new but the rest of the items I was able to reuse from my previous house, which made this makeover pretty affordable!

Here's the source list:
-Hardwood floor color is 'Jacobean' stain by Minwax (on red oak flooring)
-Area rug is from Overstock
-Side lamps are from Lowes
-Ceiling light fixture is from Wayfair
-Wall paint color is 'Window Pane' from Sherwin Williams
-Bedding and curtains are from Home Goods (purchased a few summers ago)
-Cordless Roman Shades were purchased from Amazon
-Nailhead trim headboard is from Target (similar)
-Side tables were purchased 10 years ago from Christmas Tree Shop
-Mirror is from IKEA (purchased it at a yard sale and painted)
-Dresser is a Salvation Army find that I painted white and then distressed

In case you forgot where is all started, here's a 'before' and 'after' of my rustic/coastal bedroom retreat...

The next space I'll be tackling is the full bath, which is done being renovated but just awaiting paint. I'll be sure to share that makeover journey soon!

I post daily home renovation updates over on Instagram...hope to see you there!

My Home Renovation Journey

2017-02-26T11:27:00.000-05:00

Today is the last day of February break and I've SO needed this past week to make some progress in this space before turning my attention back to teaching. I'll be honest in saying that it hasn't been easy juggling home renovations and school obligations (while also trying to fit in some fun and relaxation in an attempt to feel human/normal) but sometimes there are busy seasons in life and this happens to be one of them!

The past few months have been an incredible whirlwind between traveling for the holidays, starting a new semester at school (with new kiddos and new courses), packing up and moving out of my previous house, and moving into my new place. Luckily there was a three week period between when I closed on this new house and when I sold my previous house, so there was at least some time to get the renovations started before moving in. I'm also fortunate to have lots of extremely generous, handy, and helpful friends and family members! So much progress has been made in some areas and yet there also seems like there's still an incredible amount of projects left to complete (baby steps)!

First, some BEFORE photos of the new place...

The Exterior

When the Maine temps are a bit warmer, the exterior siding will be repaired and repainted and I'd also really love to add either a farmer's porch or at least a small covered porch over the front door. Garrison style homes are one of my least favorite styles of homes so I'll do what I can to add some curb appeal! One advantage that this home has over my last, is the garage! Although it's small, my car does fit (the very first thing I did after closing was drive my car into the garage) and hopefully next winter when the renovations are over, the garage will be empty enough for me to actually use it!

The Kitchen/Dining Area

Through the side entrance you come into the kitchen. The space was pretty dark and a bit cramped so my immediate thought was to tear down the wall between the kitchen and the separate dining room, which you can see through the doorway in the photo above. Removing the wall would allow more light into the space and would allow for a more open entertaining area.

The layout of the kitchen would need to be reworked since the wall dividing the space is now gone, so I set my mind to designing a 'one wall' kitchen with a large center island and a walk-in pantry. The space is already so much larger and just makes much more sense for my style of living and entertaining.

Above is the view from inside the original dining room...the wall to the right has since been removed. Below is the 'before' and 'progress' views of the space with and without the wall. Hopefully by next weekend I'll have a partially functioning kitchen since I've been living off of a microwave and refrigerator for the last few weeks!

The Living Room

The sunken living room is really the space that sold me on this house (other than the great neighborhood)! I could see the potential in the brick fireplace, the built-ins, and the size. I also like that this space is right off the kitchen so it will make sort of one large continuous entertaining space. This is the room in the house that is the closest to being complete as I really needed at least one clean, happy place while everything else is in shambles!

Here's a little sneak peek at the progress made so far:

The Front Room

Since the sunken living room was an addition to the house, the original structure also has a living room. Since I don't really need two full-sized living rooms, I decided to borrow some space from the front living room to add a walk-in pantry (accessible from the kitchen side). Although the brick chimney had to stay because it's hooked up to the boiler, the rest of the brick hearth was removed and the new pantry was framed in. I'm thinking I'll now turn the front room into a little office or reading/library area at some point. Below is a view from the kitchen where the door to the pantry was added (where those 2x4s are).

The Half Bath

The half bath on the main level also houses a laundry closet. The vanity & toilet have been removed and the tile wall has been demoed. New flooring has been added and I had the washer/dryer stacked. I also added paintable beadboard wallpaper to cover up all the imperfections on the laundry closet wall. A small cabinet with shelving above for some storage will be added to finish up the space.

The Full Bath

The bathroom was the first thing to be completed as I needed it to be up and running before I moved in. We had a two week time frame to get it all done! This space is a good size and since it's the only full size bath in the house I wanted to add a double vanity to make it more functional. After everything was gutted, the plumbing and electrical were moved and a new vanity (which I LOVE) was added. I chose to do a plank wall to cover up the wallpaper and the holes where the original lighting/electrical fixtures were. A new toilet, shower/tub, and new flooring have also been added. There's still some finish work left to do as well as decor (the fun part) but it's functional and looking good so far!

The Master Bedroom

The master bedroom is a long and narrow space, the walls are covered in wallpaper, and the chimney runs up straight through one of the closets, so there were some design challenges. The first decision I made was to have one of the windows removed to better accommodate furniture placement. Other than right in front of the doorway, there was really no other place to put a queen sized bed! So, the window on the side wall was removed and then wood planks were added to the space to cover up the wallpaper (I gave up on my attempt to remove it). The chimney in the closet has to stay but it was painted white to better fit in! A new light fixture was added and the floors were refinished.

Progress so far...

The Other Bedrooms

The home has three other decent sized bedrooms (with great size closets, too)! Luckily, other than refinishing the hardwood flooring, there are only mostly cosmetic updates do be done in these spaces. The first room to get a makeover will be the 'pink room' which will be painted gray and turned into my office/craft room!

My plan is to do a separate blog post for each space in the house with lots of 'before' and 'after' photos and the details on each space. Be sure to check back in to follow along on this journey! I also post (almost) daily home renovation pics/videos on Instagram! Hope to see you there, friends!

Now, off to lesson plan for the week ahead!

New House Design Inspiration

2016-12-29T19:44:00.000-05:00

If you've been following me on Instagram or on my Pinterest board, you probably know that I'm in the process of selling my current home. I haven't yet shared many details as to why I'm selling and to where I'm heading, so I thought I'd take the opportunity to do so! I had my current home built a little over 5 years ago and while I love it's adorable charm (and the fact that it's super energy efficient since it's a new build), I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood as well as have a bit more space. Every couple of years or so I buy and renovate a 'flip house' as a little side business, so I'm always scouting the MLS for homes with great potential. A few months ago I found a fixer upper in a great neighborhood that's only 3 minutes from my current home.

The new house has a ton of equity potential and some features that I couldn't afford if I was building again from scratch. For now, I'm planning to buy it, live in it, complete the renovations, then possibly sell it a few years down the line (we'll see)! I enjoy the challenge of taking a home in need of updating and turning it in to something beautiful and inviting, while at the same time building equity. I'll share more interior photos once everything is official in a couple weeks, but for now, here are some design boards I've created (using the Morpholio App on my iPhone) from which to draw inspiration as I begin to tackle renovations.

Living Room Inspiration

The new house actually has two living rooms, one as part of the main living space, and the other is a sunken living room with a fireplace that was added as an addition at some point. I am SUPER excited to have a fireplace that's similar to the one pictured above...well it will be similar once I paint the brick white and stain the wood mantle! I already own the striped curtains from Marshalls as well as gray IKEA sofas and a similar coffee table so I'm off to a good start! I will be installing new flooring throughout the main floor and am leaning toward Pergo 'Southern Grey Oak' laminate flooring. The chair pictured above is from Target and the rug is from Overstock. I'm going to be on the prowl for vintage furniture from my local thrift stores to use in this new house! I'm leaning toward 'Repose Gray' by Sherwin Williams for the wall color in this space.

Kitchen Inspiration

The vibe of the new house is definitely leaning toward the whole 'farmhouse/rustic' style ala Fixer Upper. I'm really feeling neutrals at this point in my design life. Pops of color can be brought in through seasonal decor. I'm going with a simple white subway tile backsplash in the kitchen and want to keep the walls a very light gray. I'm hoping for a farmhouse sink and so far this IKEA sink seems to be the most affordable. I'm torn between going for granite countertops or sticking with the more cost-conscious laminate, particularly because I have laminate in my current home and it's so pretty, most people think it's granite! Either way, the counters will be very light and bright, as seen in the top right image from Liz Marie Blog. I'm going to build a huge kitchen island similar to the one pictured above that will double as a table because I've found that whenever I'm entertaining, people ALWAYS congregate around the island yet they never sit at the dining table! The black barn light is from Northern Tool and the faucet is from Amazon. I already own a vintage black kitchen scale purchased at my favorite local vintage shop!

Master Bedroom Inspiration

Luckily, all of the second floor bedrooms as well as the staircase have hardwood flooring. The floors will be refinished using Minwax 'Classic Gray' stain, which will look nice with the Pergo flooring being installed on the first floor. The wall color for the master bedroom will be Sea Salt by Sherwin Williams. I've used this color in the bathroom of my current home and in a couple of the flip houses and I love it! It's a pretty green-gray color that reminds me of the beach and sea glass! The bed pictured above is from Target but I've found a very similar bed from WalMart that's half the price so I may choose the latter. The rug pictured above is from Pottery Barn but they no longer carry it...I'm on the hunt for similar, budget friendly options. The bedding swatch pictured is from the set I already own, purchased from Home Goods last summer. Last year I purchased a vintage chandelier similar to the one pictured and it's been in my basement just waiting for it's debut! It will go up in my new bedroom for sure!

(Walmart bed, half the price of the Target bed but not sure if I'm in love with the 'sleigh bed' look)

Full Bathroom Inspiration

This new house has a half bath on the main floor and one full bath upstairs where the bedrooms are located. I'm going to swap out the single vanity for a double, which will certainly add some functionality to the space. The vanity pictured is from Wayfair, however, I'm going to keep shopping around to find something similar at the best price. A floor tile that looks like wood will be installed, which will go nicely with the soon-to-be stained hardwood floors upstairs. The bathroom will be painted the same color as the master bedroom (Sea Salt) and the same subway tile used in the kitchen will be installed as the shower/tub surround. I already own the striped shower curtain from West Elm as well as the towels from Walmart. I designed and painted the large Emerson quote pallet sign and it's in use as decor in my current bathroom. The rustic wood mirrors from Lowes will add some warmth to the space. I can't seem to find the link to the light fixture pictured by I will shop around for something similar when the time comes.

The next couple of months are going to be VERY busy as I work to renovate this home before moving out of my current home. There are three remaining bedrooms, a half bath, a dining area, and another living room for which to create designs, not to mention the exterior which will receive a totally new paint color as well as a farmer's porch on the front! I'm hoping to do my first Facebook Live video with a house tour when I officially get the keys in a couple of weeks, so pop on over and follow that page if you'd like to check it out! Thanks for following along on this new adventure!

Classroom Tour: Decorations & Organization

2016-08-23T08:00:00.000-04:00

A new school year is almost upon us so I've been busy working to put my classroom together. I originally wrote this post two years ago when I first moved into my new classroom space. Since then, I've added and rearranged a few things to I've added an updated video tour!

Next to the door I have a little shelf with supplies for the students to use (that shelf was free on the side of the road and I gave it a little makeover). I also have a bulletin board with some personal pictures, at which the students love to look!

To the left of the supply shelf I have a little table on which is my 'absent work' bin. Under the table are the recycling & returnable bottle bins. On the wall is my homemade 'Awesome' poster. You can see a tutorial for a similar sign, here!

This room has a serious lack of bulletin boards so I decided that I could use some Command strips to secure three inexpensive poster frames (picked up at WalMart) to the wall. This way I can easily swap out displays throughout the year in or on the poster frames.

On the front wall I have a white board and one of two small bulletin boards...

I used my Silhouette Portrait cutting machine to cut out the letters for my bulletin boards and used inexpensive blue fabric from WalMart instead of paper for the background. I find that fabric is more durable than paper and is often far less expensive! The 'Work Hard' poster can be found here!

I made the pennant flags banner by cutting triangles out of fabric and sewing a simple straight stitch to string them together...

In front I also keep my little personalized yard sale stool...

In the corner near the window is my desk area...I brought a shelf from home for storage and added a bulletin board, secured to the wall with more Command strips and covered in wrapping paper! I designed that poster and had it printed at Staples on foam board for $10!

There is room for a little sitting area in front of my desk and the window so I added a comfy chair from Ikea (I also found a small inexpensive lime green rug from WalMart and added it to this area but didn't take a picture). I often stay late at school grading papers and wanted a comfy chair...as you can imagine, this chair is also very popular with my students!

In the other back corner of the room is a little table and library area. I bought the table for $1 at Goodwill and painted it before bringing it to school. The paper lanterns are from Christmas Tree Shops. They are a fun addition to this area...for some reason the boys LOVE to spin the lowest lantern!

I used painters tape to add a jumbo poster...damage free and easily removed! I ran out of tape part way through and am embarrassed to report that, four weeks later, the poster still looks like this! Ha!

I bought the bookshelf from Target and it was originally in my living room. But, this room also suffers from a serious lack of shelving so I brought it to school to hold my collection of social studies related books and resources.

On the back wall I have another white board...on the top I put a fancier version of a fabric banner...this one has bias tape on top and double-sided pennants!

I had a really large blank space on this wall so I used a $3 vinyl tablecloth from Christmas Tree Shops and secured it to the wall with painters tape (over which I taped bulletin board trim). I think I'll turn it into an 'AWESOME' wall where the kids can put things that are...well...awesome!

We've come full circle around the room! I think the key to making the room look cohesive is to pick a few main colors to work with. In my room, lime green, hot pink, and teal blue are the colors of choice! Outside of my classroom I went a little off kilter with the colors by adding this homemade 'Hello Sunshine' sign...

I wanted people to walk by my room and be greeted with a little bit of happiness! Subsequently, one of my fellow teachers stops and yells 'Hello Sunshine' every time he passes my room! It's pretty awesome! So, there you have it, my home away from home! To follow along with my daily shenanigans, come visit me on Instagram!

Favorite Children's Sewing Patterns

2016-07-21T19:50:00.000-04:00

Summer vacation means lots of time for sewing! Some of my favorite items to sew are for kids as they usually take no time at all to whip up and can be made with the most adorable and fun fabrics! Today I thought I'd share a few of my favorite free and/or inexpensive children's sewing patterns!

One of my favorite sources for kid's patterns is Sew Sweet Patterns (not sponsored in any way, I just like their patterns). The patterns are for beginner/moderate sewers and they often have sales. I've made two adorable patterns including my most recent project, a dress for my friend's daughter which could quite possibly be the cutest darn thing I've ever made! I used the Collette Dress pattern and coordinating fabric purchased from Hobby Lobby. I fell in love with the ruffle details on the front and on the sleeves!

I also made a sweet little girl's romper using another Sew Sweet pattern. The original pattern isn't listed on their page anymore but they have several other romper options.

One of my favorite free patterns for little boys is this toddler/baby necktie pattern from Kinzie's Kreations! It can easily be put on and taken off thanks to the velcro closure on the neck loop! The pattern comes with a few different size options, too.

For the babies, I've made a couple sets of knit leggings, bibs, and hats, all using free patterns. Knit fabric can be tricky to sew but there are lots of tutorials on Pinterest that explain how best to sew with knits! If knits are too intimidating, the bandana bib can be sewn using cotton fabric which is easier to work with.

The knotted hat pattern can be found here, the bandana bib pattern can be found here, and the baby leggings pattern can be found here. In addition to being free, I love these patterns because they are unisex (depending on the fabric choice), and can be whipped up really quickly. I've attended a few baby showers recently and have given these sets as gifts!

I'm always on the hunt for new patterns and projects to sew and have quite the collection of ideas on my Sew Cute Pinterest page! Come on over and find me there, too! Now, I'm off to start my next project!