If you don’t want to show up in your friends’ FaceBook ads, go to:

1. Settings
2. Privacy
3. News Feed and Wall
4. Click on “Facebook Ads”
5. In the “Appearance in Facebook Ads” box, click “no one” (unless, of course, you actually want to tell your spouse to check out hot singles)

I changed that setting right away.

What about you? Have you received any funny Facebook ads?

Even though I’m a writer, and a marketer, and a networker, the task was overwhelming for me. So I started thinking what would have made it easier for me, and ultimately, what will make it easier for you. Here are my thoughts so far on how you can write/ask for great Linked recommendations from your connections.

• Give reminders. Instead of my former boss, Rex Hammond, asking, “Can you recommend me?” he could ask some of his contacts, “Can you recommend me for the work I did on the TDX project? (or LEAD Virginia, or the Committee of 100, or … you get the point.)”
• Tell stories. I’ve always said that Stacy Schubert is the star to watch. I struggled with how to convey that exactly, in my recommendation of her, until I remembered a story that illustrated my point.
• Use picture words. When I wrote the recommendation for Robin Caughey, my favorite massage therapist, I had a word picture that I could not get out of my mind: the hands of God. So I went with it. I think it works in this context.
• Use strengths. My friend Christine Kennedy is so incredibly capable that writing her recommendation should be easy, but in fact it has been the hardest of all. How can I narrow her recommendation to just one or two things? By focusing on her strengths of strategic, communication, belief, etc. (I’m still working on this one, Chickee.)
• Write it for them. When I worked at the Chamber, we wanted to use testimonials in some of our marketing. We had members who were willing to say good things about their experience, but they just weren’t quite sure how to say it. So we wrote what we knew to be true, based on our shared experience, and asked them if what we wrote was something they would be comfortable saying. They agreed, or tweaked what we sent them. We got great testimonials for our use. It was a win-win situation.

I’ll admit, I haven’t written any LinkedIn recommendations for myself but right about now I would love to be in possession of 9 pre-written endorsements from my connections.

What do you think? Would it be helpful if someone asking you for a LinkedIn recommendation provided you with some (or all) copy to get you started?

It’s about ministry.

My speaking, my facilitation, my writing all ignite my passion when I’m able to use those gifts in ministry-related settings. When I can incorporate faith-based principles into content, when I can pray with groups about their direction and purpose and use Scripture to encourage people - those are the times when I’m most alive!

That may be all I know for sure at the moment.

It’s scary because the mere suggestion that I want to work with churches, ministry organizations and Christ followers who are business owners/business professionals has the potential to alienate me from a lot of great folks I’ve met and worked with in the last two years. Nonetheless, I know this is where I’m heading. My whole life has been moving towards this.

I still have a ton of questions like:

• What specific areas of work make the most sense for me?
• How do I balance my desire to serve with my desire to contribute to my family?
• With a finite amount of time available, how do I spend my time wisely in order to get the best possible return - from a kingdom perspective and from a financial perspective?
• What are the next steps I should be taking?
• How do I balance the need to plan and follow that plan, with the need to follow the voice of the One who said, “go to a land I will show you,”?

For now, it’s just one step at a time. Starting with this blog post.

What about you?
When has God called you to a new thing and how have you navigated that time in your life? In your business? In your ministry? (I really want to hear your feedback on this one!)

(Creative Commons graphic on Flickr by Purpleslog.)

So I thought I would write a love letter to God. But God said, “Be still.”
Then I thought I would read more of the Bible. But God said, “Be still.”
Music! Music always helps me worship. But God said, “Be still.”
So instead, I thought I should journal. But God said, “Be still.”

“But God, don’t I have to DO something?
READ something?
PRAY something?
WRITE something?

How can I just ‘BE STILL?’
It’s so counter to culture, society, church – to life?”

“Be still.”

“OK – You want me to ‘Be still?’ (Sometimes I’m a slow learner.) I will. Pen down. Now….”

…So I went outside to be still, just in time to hear the bells chime 12 times for it was noon. But God was not in the bells.

And I heard the leaves in the trees rustling in the breeze. But God was not in the breeze, nor in the leaves.

And I heard the sound of a lawn mower whirring in the distance. But God was definitely not in the lawn mower. (Can I get an “Amen?”)

And I heard the bees buzzing busily around me as I sat on the deck. But God was not in the bees.

And I heard the birds in the neighborhood and in the woods behind my house, singing beautifully. But God was not in the birds nor in their song.

And finally, I was still. I felt the breeze on my cheeks and relished the sun’s gentle kiss on my skin (for it had been raining for what seemed to be 40 days and 40 nights). Just then, a fly landed on my arm. And God was in the fly (not literally, lest some confuse me with a pantheist). I watched it for a bit, realizing that flies don’t land on moving objects. When I’m so busy doing – I don’t give God the chance to simply love on me.

I know what it’s like to love a child unconditionally. At night when I lie down to say prayers with Hannah and Morgan, I hold them and tell them how much I love them. I lovingly place my hand on Morgan’s head as he snuggles into my chest, or sometimes gently sweep locks of hair away from Hannah’s face so I can gaze into her eyes. And together, we share this beautiful moment of intimacy, not based on actions nor behaviors. The good and bad of the day somehow fade away and we simply enjoy being with one another.

When I send Jake or Michaela out the door to catch the bus, I stop them in their haste to be “first,” so I can get their attention. I place their faces in my hands, look them directly in the eyes and say, “Have a good day. I love you.”

And I remind all of them that if I lined up all the little children in the whole wide world, I would choose them to be my sons and daughters.

But I don’t always understand how to be loved like that by God. I have my moments when I slow down long enough to allow him to land on me (like that fly) and pour out His love towards me. But sadly, those times are few and far between. I’m often so busy telling God and showing God how much I love Him, that I don’t give Him time nor permission to love on me.

But today, I got it right. I was still and I knew that He was God.

When I was a little girl, I witnessed this phenomenon on Saturday’s at Ruth’s in Martinez, GA (a small family diner right outside of Augusta, known for great coffee and breakfast). I’m sure right now across the country hundreds or maybe even thousands of restaurants all across the country, men are gathering over coffee to chew the fat.

And it made me think…

• Friendships develop over time - Perhaps initially these men were business acquaintances or golf buddies, but eventually the relationships grew into solid friendships.
• Friends enjoy being together - You don’t voluntarily meet, especially not daily, with people just for the heck of it. These guys really enjoyed one another’s company.
• Don’t overlook fun - Did you notice the sign they brought with them? They told me that “Stammtisch” is German for “wise men.” I say it could mean “friends gather here” or “hey, let’s pull the wool over Cheryl’s eyes!”

This week I sent an email to a dozen or so leaders, asking for their thoughts on leadership - deterrents, skills and tools. A good percentage of the people I asked said that having strong peer relationships with others who are like minded is extremely important to continued growth. I guess Tom Rath was right in his book Vital Friends.

Evidently the wise guys, I mean wise men, at Starbucks already know friendships are important.

You may remember that Friends is one of my three words for 2009. Last week I met with one of my Vital Friends on Monday and another on Tuesday. This week I met with two of them together for lunch. Each time I’ve been able to engage with these ladies, I come away better. My life is enriched and I have a sense that I’m becoming more of who God intends for me to be.

This coming week? I am scheduling a time to connect with another of my Vital Friends.

So what about you?
Are you nurturing your friendships? If so, how and what happens as a result? And if not, what are you waiting for? You’ll be glad you did!

Thanks to Dave Murr, here’s my pitch. I think it’s actually pretty funny because of all the distractions. Please watch and tell me what you think.

Cheryl Smith’s Elevator Pitch at SOBcon from David Murray on Vimeo.

And finally, if what’s your elevator pitch? Leave it in the comments section so I can hear your take on this important piece of business communication.

I’ve known Ken Garren, President of Lynchburg College, (LC) for several years and actually had the privilege of attending his inaugural ball. I’ve seen him and his lovely wife Sheila dance before, but not quite like this. And I loved it! Evidently, the students loved it too, as you’ll hear from the applause at the end.

Take a couple of minutes and enjoy this video. Great job Ken, Sheila and LC staff for showing your human side and embracing social media.

How else might high impact leaders use social media to be real with people in their organizations? What have you seen that works well? And what has failed miserably?

My brain is saturated.

Here are just a few of the ideas and conversations that have my attention while I endure a very long layover in the Charlotte airport.

1. From David Bullock, profit engineer, “Free is nice, but free does not get me paid.” Nuff said.
2. From Ryan Rasmussen,  virtual worlds guy, “You already have an affiliate program. Provide them with better tools to help them help you.” Immediately I thought of my three words post.
3. Hallway conversations often have more power than the content presented in sessions. Like the 10-year passion plan conversation I had with Jon Swanson, social media chaplain.
4. Thoughtfulness goes a long way and makes a huge difference. I appreciate the fact that Liz Strauss, perhaps the most influential relational blogger on the Internet, was deliberate in scheduling our last session this morning at Hotel 71 rather than at the Summit Executive Centre. We were able to enjoy breakfast together and folks were able to check out/leave throughout the morning, without having to trek back and forth a few blocks with luggage in tow.

I have so much more to process and pray through. I’ll be sure to share additional highlights with you, in the days and weeks to come.

For those of you who also attended, what are you digesting from SobCon09? And for the rest of you, what do you find to be the most effective way to process information, insights and aha’s from conferences you’ve attended? I’d sure love to read your tips in the comments section!

Here are a few things I love about CLT: