Cyber Zen Communique

Another Bleeding Heart Liberal or Burning Souls

2012-02-09T11:36:00.000-06:00

MEMO: FROM THE TEMPLE OF APOLLO

2012-02-07T14:44:00.000-06:00

DATE: 12 November 31 A.D.

TO: Draconius Butholius

FROM: Creepious Disgustius

Senator Buthoius there is a matter of great importance I need immediate action on. There is a local man that keeps gathering unauthorized people into our temple when not in use claiming he is the son of god.

But which one? Athena, Hera. This strange man will not say. He also claims there is just one God; any good Roman knows this is plain wrong.

As you know Winter Solstice is almost here. You know what a blast I, you, and the other Senators have at this thing. I just want to get rid of that nuisance as soon as possible. I hope we can resolve this matter soon.

Sincerely,

Creepious Disgustius

boring people as i babble of quiting smoking

2012-02-06T14:00:00.000-06:00

water vapor rising on a rare in door cigarette

no ashes, no butts, no endless bitching

dirty looks or stone silence over an issue

that almost started a 2nd American Civil War

in the 1980s leaving aside such trivial things

as war, peace, nukes, taxes, jobs, government programs,

illegal drugs to focus on the worst problem

the universe has ever known - smoking tobacco

as i wind up yet another smart ass

arrangement of words somebody

might think of as poetry

A Beautiful Person

2012-02-02T14:56:00.000-06:00

always with a kind word

always with a smile

gentle, sweet, loving

despite my grandpa's

mental problems

despite my dad's

mental problems

despite some

financial struggles

living a simple

ordinary life

displaying a rare strength

a cheerful disposition

in the face of life's

adversities

indifference

2012-02-02T12:50:00.000-06:00

day after day

week after week

month after month

year after year

the same old political

the same old money

games, scams, lies, half-truths

as most people

go less blindly along

in our ever unaffordable

consumerism

hollowness, emptiness, depression

engulfs some

the american system

wielded like a loaded gun

pointed straight at

your head

EVERYTHING IS POLITICAL NOW

2012-01-31T12:43:00.000-06:00

Everything is political now

Whether you drive a Smart Car, SUV or bicycle is political

Whether you eat meat or don't eat meat is political

Whether you are vegan, vegetarian, gluten/bio food free is political

Whether you smoke or don't smoke is political

Whether you are white, black, Asian, Native American, or a Pacific Islander is political.

Whether you are male or female is political

Whether you are Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, Muslim, or Atheist is political

Whether you are gay, straight, bi-sexual or transgender is political

Everything is political now

Whether you wear your conservative suit and tie or your liberal
t-shirt and jeans

Whether you you wear your conservative loafers or your liberal Day Glo funky sneakers

It's all political now

Someday I suspect

Whether you are left or right handed

Will be a political issue

One day

ORDINARY HYSTERIA

2012-01-29T13:26:00.000-06:00

Crying woman on convenience store floor

Customers quietly checking out

Avoiding the elephant in the room

Man screaming, yelling at you

For pausing too long in front

Of his house checking directions

Woman forgetting her change

As she leaves the store

Engulfed in grief over her

Dead soldier son

Day in and day out

For years on end now

Paranoia as common

As the clouds in the sky

Kept well primed by

The ever expanding media

A KEY TO THE KINGDOM

2012-01-27T12:56:00.000-06:00

the churchkey was old and worn

the Pabst Blue Ribbon lettering

barely visible after 80 years

opening the doors to thousands

of cathedrals of beer

popping the tops on churches

of ale and lager

preserving the righteousness

of the brew and suds

worshipping at the alter

of the can or bottle

quietly drinking down

the spirits inside

THE GREAT PORTAPOTTY EXTRAVAGANZA

2012-01-27T12:37:00.000-06:00

STEALING KISSES

2012-01-26T14:38:00.000-06:00

stealing kisses in youth

running around apartment

courtyards playing soccer

football, tag trying not

to catch cooties

as the teen boys

with their flowing locks

strutted skinny in

tight t-shirts and jeans

flirting with the teen girls

as they laughed, giggled

covered their faces

ignoring us pre-teen boys

until we stole a kiss

chasing us, hitting us

before returning

to the teen boys

DANCING NOTES

2012-01-25T16:42:00.001-06:00

2027

2012-01-24T13:59:00.000-06:00

IT WAS JANUARY 11, 2027

A TIME EVERYONE THOUGHT WOULD BE HEAVEN

BUT NO ONE COULD TELL

THAT IT WOULD BE HELL

AS THE WORLD ENDED AT HALF PAST ELEVEN

HAIKU WITH TITLE

2012-01-24T13:54:00.000-06:00

haiku with title

simply against the set rules

why not go for it

ODE TO A BIDET

2012-01-24T10:58:00.000-06:00

glistening white porcelain

mostly found in expensive homes

ode to a bidet

usually found adjacent

to a toilet

ode to a bidet

that can also be a urinal

ode to a bidet

that can also be a sink

ode to a bidet

that is used to clean

stank bums

THE NAMBY AND THE PAMBY

2012-01-23T14:20:00.000-06:00

He sniveled constantly. He sniveled about cleaning the house. He sniveled about mowing the lawn. He sniveled about standing in line at the grocery store. He sniveled about constantly loosing the remote control. He sniveled about too much dressing on his salad. He was an intense sniveler.

Some say his sniveling came from being molly coddled. He was molly coddled in the crib. He was molly coddled at home. He was molly coddled at school. He was molly coddled at church. He even won a molly coddling contest when he was 15.

When he wasn't sniveling or being molly coddled, he was belly aching. He belly ached about a favorite football team losing. He belly ached about a restaurant order taking too long. He belly ached at the price of gas. He belly ached about his old car in need of unaffordable repairs.

But when he wasn't sniveling, belly aching, or being molly coddled, he was whining. He whined about the lousy economy. He whined about his coffee being too strong. He whined about getting fatter. He even whined about the taste of his wine.

Thus he was the embodiment of the namby and the pamby. Sniveling, molly coddling, belly aching, and whining his way
into the mediocre pages of history. Enough said.

THE DICK DIALOGUE (A SHORT SUBJECT)

2012-01-20T14:35:00.000-06:00

ode to my penis, cock, shaft, and dick

suffering immense pain as the surgeon put

the scalpel to my penis for circumcision

ode to my penis, cock, shaft, and dick

as the sensitive skin got rashes

causing me to scratch myself raw

in the early days of my youth

ode to my penis, cock, shaft, and dick

as I pissed razor blades at age 23

getting gonorrhea (the clap) from

entering the vagina unprotected

ode to my penis, cock, shaft, and dick

giving me moments of pleasure

through my journey through life

VOTE FOR ME ALL YOU SWINGING BITCHES!

2012-01-20T12:31:00.000-06:00

THE PORCELAIN GOD

2012-01-19T14:08:00.000-06:00

WORSHIPPED AT IN MODERN TIMES AS MUCH

AS ANY CURRENT OR PAST DEITY OR PANTHEON

THE PRAYERS FOR MERCY AND REFLIEF AS MANY

IF NOT MORE THAN THOSE TO JESUS, THE VIRGIN

MARY, ZEUS, JUPITER, HERA, SATURN, VISHNU, BRAHMA,

MOHAMMED, BUDDHA, AND THE GREAT SPIRIT

AS MILLIONS OF ACHING HEADS

HAVE RESTED AGAINST THE COOL RIM

OF THOMAS CRAPPER'S INVENTION:

THE PORCELAIN GOD

AN EXCERPT FROM WIKIPEDIA 01/18/2012

2012-01-18T13:43:00.001-06:00

SOME AMERICAN HEROES

2012-01-16T16:09:00.000-06:00

DR. MARTIN LUTHER KING (1929-1968)

Civil Rights Leader & Activist

KAREN SILKWOOD (1946-1974)

Nuclear Power Industry Activist

Chief Joseph (1840-1904)

Great Native American Leader & Humanitarian

Margaret Sanger (1879-1966)

Birth Control & Women's Righ Activist

THE GREAT 8-TRACK TAPE VISUAL ASSAULT

2012-01-13T13:13:00.000-06:00

DANCING IN MY GLAD RAGS

2012-01-13T12:24:00.000-06:00

THE BROW BEATER

2012-01-13T10:31:00.000-06:00

the brow beater

looms over a person

turning more and more red

as his brows turn to large black snakes

beating, snarling, whipping

a person to death

EXTREME DANDRUFF

2012-01-10T12:01:00.000-06:00

It was one of those odd things. None of the usual suspects were in play. Sure anyone with half a brain cell knew the world was mired in endless debates over pollution, oil, nukes, religion, and money but nobody knew what would come next.

The real threat to mankind turned out to be extreme dandruff. Dr. Drypate discovered this recently on the archaeological digs outside of New Havana, Florida.

According to Dr. Drypate's Theory, when one of the diggers accidentally hit a Miami Sound Machine CD from the 1980's it caused a rip in The Space-Time Continuum causing human and mammal bodies to become extremely dry thus causing extreme dandruff.

However, to say this dandruff was extreme is an understatement. Dr. Drypate or no one else could find a cure of this condition. Thus within a week humans and mammals would literally turn into dust.

Most of the humans/mammals by this time were really flaky to say the least. They tried their best to cope with the condition. They raided department stores for all the moisturizers they could get their hands on. Some of the humans/mammals using gallons of moisturizer actually managed to stay alive for 2 weeks.

However, in the end it seems mankind was done in by the itchy scalp. Dandruff treating shampoos by this time cost $20,000 a piece. Most people could not afford this. Violent mob raids on retail outlets for the precious shampoos and moisturizers became common place.

It just goes to show you how hard the future is to predict. Sometimes things take strange turns. No one ever thinking of the possibility of Death by Dandruff.

MY POETRY POEM

2012-01-09T15:42:00.000-06:00

babbling brooks nestled amongst lush green swards

fauna, foliage in delicate sweet balance as honey bees

drink sweet nectar from lovely, sparse winter trees

yet these words do not rhyme or have a set scheme

no Shakespearean iambic pentameter, limerick, or

any other set structure that many serious poets like

just free verse with simple words flowing in and out

writing more about society, the state of the world

than romance or nature like many milquetoast poets

so to hell with endless poems of babbling brooks

so to hell with endless poems about succulent breasts

lay down the hard line of bullet splattered brains

limbs torn from bodies paying the tab at the gas station

while endless diseased super rich callously destroy

everything in sight for another billion to hide in

Cayman Island bank accounts while exploited child labor

in Honduras make their $2000 Italian suits...

now that's some hard lines many do not think belong

in the soft, delicate world of most poets and poetry