d/b/a DALTON HAMMOND

tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85299262025-10-01T02:59:12.545-04:00d/b/a DALTON HAMMONDA PG-rated look at my golf, astronomy, humor, photos, and poetryDalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comBlogger297125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-16527296298924700102016-04-19T22:56:00.001-04:002016-04-19T23:04:25.150-04:00Like Hillary Clinton?

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-35370944448014847752014-11-22T23:11:00.000-05:002014-11-22T23:11:27.578-05:00My Status

I have decided that I could use a little more status around here. Therefore I am declaring myself an illegal alien.  -- Dalton

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-19275163803536613562014-10-14T21:58:00.002-04:002014-10-14T22:02:37.908-04:00Admiral Horatio Nelson

I would like to suggest a novel by my good golf buddy Don Tortorice whose latest book came out this month. It's a 50-years-in-the-making novel about Horatio Nelson, 1st Viscount Nelson, KB who was a British flag officer famous for his service in the Royal Navy, particularly during the Napoleonic Wars. I, Horatio, the novel, is the first

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-69301851298036307692014-05-08T10:04:00.002-04:002014-05-08T10:04:49.048-04:00And when I die

When I die I'm not going to "pass", I'm going to DIE! Passing is for sissies. Men die. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-11272590800829548802014-04-27T20:32:00.002-04:002014-04-27T22:04:25.033-04:00Why Birds Fly in A V Shape

Scientists have long wondered why large birds fly in a "V" formation. I have seen many explanations but it seems to me that anybody with half a brain would realize that they do it to avoid the flying birdshit. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-46023011616884117462013-12-05T15:04:00.001-05:002013-12-05T15:12:46.111-05:00Skin Deep

I had a girl friend once who would make me wait an hour while she teased and sprayed her dyed hair, drew eyebrows back where the real ones had been plucked, glued on eyelashes and daubed mascara, painted her artificial fingernails, applied makeup and powder to hide her face, put on a bra to enhance her sagging bosoms, a girdle to make her look thinner, stockings and high heels to make her legs

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-14673222108511812272013-12-03T16:18:00.001-05:002013-12-03T16:21:18.078-05:00Junk Mail

Who do I complain to about this? Lately I've been getting quite a bit of junk mail from the United States Postal Service. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-55289096854725870862013-10-03T20:51:00.001-04:002013-10-05T23:15:02.410-04:00Federal Shutdown

I've had enough of this business of blaming the Federal Shutdown on Republicans. If there were no Democrats would we still have a shutdown? Thankyouverymuch. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-71443451930115352312013-09-24T20:19:00.000-04:002013-09-24T20:19:18.744-04:00NASA Mars Rover finds no sign of methane

(P.B.N.) -- Finding no methane on Mars, NASA has turned its instruments to Russia where massive amounts of methane have been detected. Scientists suspect it comes from Putin.

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-83355666228668151202013-08-30T19:14:00.000-04:002013-08-30T19:14:13.413-04:00Happy Labor Day

Labor Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the first Monday in September, that celebrates the economic and social contributions of workers. The workers respond to the honor by not coming to work.

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-75403147153385844932013-07-09T16:03:00.002-04:002013-07-09T16:05:59.016-04:00Review: The Lone Ranger

I take back what I thought about the Lone Ranger. After I got over the shock of what they did to my revered image of the traditional story I have been replaying some of the highlights of the new film in my memory and I'm enjoying them more with each replay. We should all be used to Hollywood special effects by now but the sight of the Daring and Resourceful Masked Rider of the Plain riding his

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-15476122186941587932013-06-12T21:47:00.003-04:002013-06-12T21:49:21.983-04:00Cream Rises

Cream rises to the top ... but turds float, too. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-49230819081121894452013-04-27T23:21:00.000-04:002013-04-27T23:21:23.143-04:00What is your mental age?

I will be 71 in a few months. While fixing supper tonight I received a phone call from a friend in Georgia who wanted me to drop everything and turn on the TV to see a full-length movie remake of the TV series "Starsky and Hutch". I had never seen a full episode of the series, only enough to make me turn off the set, but I decided to run down some YouTube clips of the new movie just to humor his

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-58923151803161720722013-04-26T13:22:00.004-04:002013-04-26T13:22:50.862-04:00What We Have Here Is Failure To Communicate

I just called a local company looking for a replacement lamp socket for my garage door opener. The answering service lady explained that the office was closed for lunch and should reopen about 1:30 pm. I asked if I should call back then at the number I just dialed and was told that I should. My question is: Nobody DIALS any more do they? What should I have said? "Call back at..." doesn't count.

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-30811747292383361702013-03-03T21:11:00.002-05:002013-03-03T21:13:00.541-05:00Mercury Over The Fair Barn

Most people have never seen the planet Mercury. Most of the time it is too close to the Sun because, well, it’s the closest planet to the Sun. But now and then the Earth, Mercury and the Sun align just right and you can see Mercury as a bright red dot low on the horizon just after sunset. Mercury over the Pinehurst, NC Fair Barn Tonight, 09-Feb-2013 at 6:36 pm I was at the Pinehurst,

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-28951378192843265412013-02-13T02:29:00.000-05:002013-02-13T02:32:11.812-05:00Obama Wants To Be Next Pope

Obama Wants to Be the Next Pope WASHINGTON, DC - Sources close to the White House have learned that Barack Obama is planning to run for the office of Pope when the College of Cardinals convenes to elect a successor to ailing Benedict XVI at the end of this month. Calling on the promise of Equality for All, Obama is said to firmly believe that the time has come for a non-Catholic to occupy the

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-63951973235803886992012-11-07T22:47:00.000-05:002012-11-17T21:58:20.623-05:00

I Voted -- But it didn't fix anything

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-70863671357647211552012-11-07T19:16:00.003-05:002012-11-07T19:20:52.302-05:00Moon at Jockey's Ridge

This is a view of the full moon over the massive sand dunes at Jockey's Ridge in Nags Head on the Outer Banks of North Carolina. The Photoshop composite was created by my friend Tom Hassell and is the best Windows desktop background image I have ever used. -- Dalton Hammond Full Moon at Jockey's Ridge

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-39729541830299737962012-08-17T21:24:00.002-04:002012-08-17T21:29:59.197-04:00Discovering Pluto

In the old days astronomers would often take pictures of the same area of the sky several nights apart. They could then study the images in a binocular viewer that combined the images. By closing one eye or the other the astronomer could spot planets, comets, or dwarf planets, all of which moved across the stars, which don't move. I took these two images four nights apart using the 16" Slooh

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-60019739732029491112012-02-18T21:19:00.000-05:002012-02-18T21:19:34.574-05:00Artificial Life

A friend of mine has a young daughter who is studying Computer Animation. One of her recent homework assignments was to animate an object and give it human movement. I suggested that she find a way to animate a D.M.V. employee. -- D.H.

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-38339211713053882692011-10-17T22:40:00.000-04:002011-10-17T22:40:08.121-04:00Balance the Federal Budget

We don't need to increase taxes on corporations to balance the budget... Just taxing the professional athletes would do it. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-58736589868088077782011-08-23T21:43:00.001-04:002011-08-23T21:44:24.885-04:00Smack Bones

Here is a cooking tip from the Deep South. Many grocery stores (Food Lion is one) sell 1-pound packets of RIB TIPS (riblets) for around $3. They look like spare ribs but the bones are only a half inch long, or so. They are the trimmings from shaping spare ribs and are prime, sweet, pork rib meat. My grandmother used to serve them as a snack or appetizer; she called them "Smack Bones" and I loved

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-81616124153254439232011-08-11T21:46:00.001-04:002011-08-11T21:47:19.495-04:002011 PGA Club Championship Update

What do the following names all have in common?(Scroll down for the answer)Steve Stricker Jerry Kelly Shaun Micheel Scott Verplank Brendon de Jonge Matteo Manassero Davis Love III John Senden Bill Haas Brandt Jobe Anders Hansen Simon Dyson Bob Sowards Adam Scott Stewart Cink Brendan Steele Brian Davis Miguel Angel Jimenez Mark Wilson Trevor Immelman D.A. Points Ricky Barnes Gary Woodland Jason

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-38454117410663631322011-06-22T14:13:00.012-04:002011-08-01T21:13:51.442-04:00FSBO - Golf front rancher for sale by owner in Pinehurst, NC

Live the dream...in PINEHURST, NC! $329,900 Price includes PCC Full Membership transfer and golf cart Need to sell your home first? Owner may finance! For sale by owner: Single Family one-story ranch; 3 bedrooms; 2 full baths Location: Doral Woods, Pinehurst, NC, 4 minutes to Pinehurst Country Club clubhouse by personal golf cart, on hole #4 of course Number 1. No other homes are visible

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8529926.post-77080889497091018542011-04-06T08:19:00.002-04:002011-04-06T08:19:36.372-04:00Federal Shutdown

The looming Federal Shutdown should not bother our country's leaders. It has already been impossible to reach a Social Security or D.M.V. office by phone for the past 30 years. -- Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammondhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11472413289604254034noreply@blogger.com