A South Korean woman earned her driver's license after 950 tries. Way to go squashing cheesy stereotypes, honey!  [more]

Author: PJ Brown
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Sat, 7 Nov 2009

Unemployment is now 10.2 percent. How bad is the economy? The economy is so bad that Archie is pimping Betty
AND Veronica. The economy is so bad that people are using the DMV as
a portrait studio. The economy is so bad the former Miss USA, Carrie
Prejean, had to pawn her implants. The economy is so bad, Donald Trump
had to fire himself. The economy is so bad, the Three Little Pigs
can't afford to get swine flu. The economy is so bad, the GEICO
caveman ate the GEICO Gecko. The economy is so bad, Madonna adopted a
baby from Detroit. [more]

Author: Chris Martin
Category: News
Keywords: unemployment archie madonna betty donald trump geico gecko
Added: Sat, 7 Nov 2009

President Barack Obama signed a joint resolution of the Senate and the House that made Casimir Pulaski an honorary citizen, 230 years after the Polish nobleman died fighting for the American colonies against the British.   In a statement released today, Senator John McCain said, "It was a privilege and honor for me to fight along side this brave man." [more]

Author: Gary B.
Category: News
Keywords: john mccain
Added: Sat, 7 Nov 2009

 
A jury convicted a man who claimed he was “too fat” to commit murder. Sir, twinkees are sugar and can be converted into energy. And besides, who’s to say you didn’t fart and your noxious gas didn’t threaten his life? Or that you didn’t try to eat them. [more]

Author: April Brucker
Category: News
Keywords: murder fat
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

 A South Carolina woman developed amnesia after having sex. Damn, if only I had that luck. [more]

Author: April Brucker
Category: News
Keywords: amnesia sex
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

 
Apparently the Fort Hood shooter was a psychiatrist. They say shrinks need to see shrinks themselves. This guy was no exception. [more]

Author: April Brucker
Category: News
Keywords: fort hood shooter
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

 
The suspect in the Fort Hood murders apparently had “financial woes.” Wow, blow the heads off a bunch of people. That’s one way to get the creditors off your back. [more]

Author: April Brucker
Category: News
Keywords: fort hood shooter
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

Did you hear about Oprah's special she did on Patrick Swayze?  She interviewed his ghost. [more]

Author: Brotha
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

 A Volkswagen van stolen 35 years ago in Washington state has been found in a shipping container at the Los Angeles/Long Beach seaport.   The owner, who was last seen at Woodstock, is still missing! [more]

Author: Gene Stray
Category: News
Keywords: woodstock volkswagon
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

Vets and scientists have been left baffled as three
bespectacled bears that live at a zoo in Leipzig, Germany have suddenly and
inexplicably gone bald.
Upon hearing the troubling news, Andre Agassi immediately
donated all his wigs to the chrome-domed creatures.  [more]

Author: Dan Berry
Category: News
Keywords: animals andre agassi
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

A campus religious leader is unhappy about a study at Duke
University that invites female students to attend sex-toy parties.
The Rev. Joe Vetter, director of the Duke Catholic Center,
condemns the study, saying that it excludes men and, thus, fails to promote
relationships... between priests and young boys!  [more]

Author: Dan Berry
Category: News
Keywords: religion catholic priests sex
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

Looking to beef up your mojo this year? Burger King may have the answer. The home of the Whopper has launched a new men’s body spray called Flame, The Flame is described as “the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat.” The fragrance is in stores and online for a limited time for $3.99. For an additional 50 cents you can purchase an upgraded body spray Flame Out, which captures the scent of the gaseous fumes, which follow your consumption of the Whopper Meal Deal.

 
  [more]

Author: Terry Tyller
Category: News
Keywords: buger king flame whopper meal deal
Added: Fri, 6 Nov 2009

News Headline: Protester calls former Australian PM ‘racist’ then throws boot at his head 
Well, that guy's screwed, now. Everybody knows that throwing a boot at a former prime minister is a bootable offense! [more]

Author: Greg Manuel
Category: News
Keywords: greg manuel australia
Added: Thu, 5 Nov 2009

An Ohio man dressed as a Breathalyzer test
for Halloween found himself blowing into one after police stopped him
for allegedly driving the wrong way without headlights on a one-way
street. A similar incident happened to a man who was dressed up as a
penis. [more]

Author: Doug Chagnon
Category: News
Keywords: halloween
Added: Thu, 5 Nov 2009

A woman pleaded guilty and will spend five days in jail after letting her daughter ride in a cardboard box on top of their van. She was charged with being the coolest mom ever. [more]

Author: Doug Chagnon
Category: News
Keywords: cardboard boxcar
Added: Thu, 5 Nov 2009