daddacool

Wordless Wednesday- We're all going on a bear hunt (at Whipsnade)

2010-03-17T08:05:00.002Z

Just Who Taught You To Do That?

2010-03-16T21:08:00.002Z

Was the question I didn't ask our eldest last night. I had other things on my mind at the time- I was lying on my back with the wee lass attempting to remove my testicles with her toes but that was really the sideshow to the main event which was being masterminded by M'laddo.

Whilst his little sister attempted to make me a full on eunuch, M'laddo set about the top of my head with his Bob the Builder(TM) saw with exuberant gusto. He's been asking to do "Bob Work" a lot recently, ever since his Uncle Ben moved house last month, I thought inanely, as the serrated plastic slipped down from my hair to my forehead, moving from a rather pleasant massage to something a little more painful. Another couple of sharp toe digs from the wee lass, just to remind me she was still there and capable of joining in with the carnage. Thanks.

Fortunately I was saved by bath time, and the opportunity for righteous revenge with a bit of hair washing and face scrubbing. I get that look from the pair of them when I wash faces, the sort of look that says, you've won this round, but just wait until you're lying on the floor tomorrow night eh?

Fear of Coldplay

2010-03-12T08:17:00.005Z

I have a fairly diverse range of musical tastes, the one thing 98.7% of the albums and artists I like have in common is wifey doesn't like them. That's understandable, there aren't many of the Stock Atkin and Waterman generation that grew up listening to the new folk revival stuff and later developed a perchance for 70's progressive rock, so I'll let her off.

So there was much rejoicing last year when, late to the party as ever, I picked up Viva la Vida, the latest Coldplay album. Finally I was coming in from the cold, and listening to some modern stuff instead of King Crimson or Captain Beefheart. However wifey isn't much of a fan of it as its not the classic Coldplay sound.

Likewise I have been roundly ridiculed for owning it. Putting it in a list of my favourite albums of the decade earned me the following comments from my online buddies:

You are dead to me.
Coldplay is to music what a steaming great poo is to interior decor.
I wouldn't touch it with a bargepole.

So there you have it, an album that managed to offend existing Coldplay fans but equally still attract scorn and ridicule from people that label anything that sells more than 1,000 copies as populist claptrap.

I'm off to sulk and listen to the Bonzo Dog Doodah Band. Laters.

Cannibalism is alive and well in St Albans

2010-03-11T19:59:00.003Z

I had my second unfortunate trip to the doctors this evening. I've had a month to brace myself for it and M'laddo was also half expecting it when we got into the car but it was still a bit upsetting none the less.

You see just over a month ago a small child, probably not unlike my small child, decided to take a bite out of M'laddo at pre school. Because he's a double hard toddler, he made no fuss or anything and it was only at bath time we saw the little neat row of serrated teeth marks on his arm. They were orientated in such a way and in such a position there would be no way he could have done it himself.

He wasn't bothered by it but wifey checked it out with the doctors and they decided on a course of oral antibiotics and a course of hep b vaccinations by injection.

Eeek!

The task fell to me to load M'laddo into the car on a Friday night and drive him to the doctors. For no good reason other than it was a change of routine he was really excited and had decided purely off his own back we were off to buy him a spiderman costume. The difference between expectation and reality isn't really fair on a two year old and I only had a packet of fizzy snake sweets to distract him afterwards.

As always the doctors were running late but M'laddo was in high spirits for the whole visit, chatting away, bright and confident of what the future held. Unfortunately.

Fortunately this time he had an inkling of what was going to happen. He was a little more subdued but still chatty, the chat focusing on the half a dozen rooms he'd rather go into over the nurses room mainly but it was a start. I was also considerably less close to blubbing like a two year old who's just had an injection as I didn't feel like I'd betrayed him.

Wordless Wednesday- Bun Bun

2010-03-10T10:29:00.000Z

Tip Toeing Around in the Dark

2010-03-04T19:43:00.003Z

Last night was a bit of an adventure and so on. I'd dragged myself out of bed at the crack of dawn the other week to a business breakfast and wangled a couple of tickets to the England Egypt footy match. Hurrah and huzzah!

The night was cold, the football damp and the trek home eventful (although not as eventful as the trip there, which had a full on loony on the tube. Pink bike and all). But what was cute was the scene I met when I got home at the witching hour. I got changed into my PJ's in the dark and grabbed my teddy bear. And I almost climbed into bed on top of M'laddo. I thought the gentle snoring was wifey but it turned out to be an almost 3 year old!

I managed to winkle him out of the bed with two bunnys and three dinosaurs and back to his bed. My side of the bed was lovely and warm though :)

Wordless Wednesday- Be Afraid

2010-03-03T08:16:00.002Z

Fantastic Mr Fox

2010-03-01T19:23:00.003Z

"Boggis and Bunce and Bean, one short, one fat one lean..." If these are words that resonate from your childhood, then you'll probably be aware that Fantastic Mr Fox was recently turned into a film.

It has one of the most stellar vocal casts I've ever seen- George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Michael Gambon and a sly cameo from Jarvis Cocker as Petey, are the highlights but nobody really puts a foot wrong. Unlike a lot of the computer animated affairs, the characters aren't homages to the voice talent either (Will Smith in any animation is definitely Will Smith).

In fact, the animation is in a league of its own. It doesn't try to compete with Pixar because lets be frank, everyone that tries to do that fails miserably but the animation is so charming, you can't help but love it.

But I'm getting a bit ahead of myself here, lets rewind a couple of weeks to a very generous invite to a private screening of Fantastic Mr Fox at 20th Century Fox's offices in London prior to today's DVD release. We also got a pre release copy of the DVD too. Which was nice. So obviously I'd seen the film about 5 times by yesterday morning.

M'laddo hadn't been to the cinema before and I must admit I was a little apprehensive that he would have the ability to concentrate and keep still for the duration of a film at the cinema. It's a bit different at home, he can wander around, grab a cheese sandwich, push his little sister over and so on and so forth. After all, he isn't quite 3 yet.

I shouldn't have worried though because as soon as the 20th Century Fox logo and anthem appeared (something my generation can't really separate from Star Wars), an absolutely smashing grin appeared on his chops that didn't disappear for approximately 83 minutes. He really was transfixed.

The film itself, in case you don't know the plot, follows the titular Mr Fox as he plans one last caper, a raid on the farms of his 3 nemesis's Farmers Boggis, Bunce and Bean. The raids go spectacularly well and incense the farmers. The farmers have their revenge though and try to dig him out of his home. Things escalate and soon it becomes a matter of life of death...

There are so many neat touches, the banter between Mr Fox's son Ash and his cousin Kristophersson are brilliant, really capturing the tension between youngsters. The use of the word "cuss" instead of swearing is inspired and has entered my daily lexicon to boot.

As well as a great vocal cast, the film has a truly cracking soundtrack. The characters wander around with little music players clipped to their belts, a nice touch, to provide us all with some musical accompaniment. We get Beach Boys, Rolling Stones and a new composition from Jarvis Cocker.

All in all its remarkably loyal to the book whilst being its own film and having its own style. I simply love the animation and hope they do another film using the same style. For M'laddo its joined "New BuzzLightyear" and "Flappy Bat" as one of his most favouritist films ever.

High praise indeed!

Dear Grandma (Bunny)

2010-02-26T12:19:00.002Z

We've been reading M'laddo Dick Bruna's Miffy books as his bedtime read recently. We got a boxed set from the book people for a paltry sum of earnings a while back and frankly I was getting bored of Thomas the Tank Engine stories.

Most of them are ace, he particularly likes Miffy at the Gallery. Wifey grabbed one for last nights story without really taking in the cover. Dear Grandma Bunny isn't really a suitable bedtime read you see.

The cover should have been a give away but the story inside that unfolds is a little more gruesome. Grandma Bunny lies cold, unbreathing and dead in her bed, probably fouling the sheets in her dying moments (the book is blessedly unclear on the last point but vivid on the rest). Grandma Bunny looks well and truly brown bread in her open casket but just to be sure they nail it shut and bury her.

I'm still unsure whether the subject matter is unsuitable for very little children or not. Very very little children have no concept of death and as they get a bit older do lack the baggage we hang upon it but even so, they have enough to worry about with pre-school, no lollipop without eating their broccoli first and little sisters puking madly to have to worry about the abstract of Grandma (Bunny) dying any time soon.

So Grandma Bunny has been placed aside from the rest of the Miffy books for the moment since we're primarily using them as a bedtime read rather than anything particularly thought provoking in an existential manner.

Finding the time

2010-02-25T08:40:00.002Z

Wifey was busily unpicking some knitting last night at ten to ten- she'd drop a row or some other such technical thing that she did explain to me but I utterly failed to understand twice, so just pretended to on the 3rd attempt, lest the knitting needle become a weapon of retribution against me.

And I was busy utterly failing to read the latest book club book. I manfully struggled through The Piano Teacher last month, which came with a recommendation from Elle magazine on the cover (the SHAME!), so thought this months would be better. It's a detective story, which in theory should be more up my street but is proving troublesome. Maybe it's because I have to read it rather than because I want to. I'm perverse like that.

But maybe it was also because my concentration span is stuffed at the moment. I was up at 6am for a business breakfast- worth it in the end as I won two tickets to England/Egypt.

Wordless Wednesday- Facebook?

2010-02-24T19:40:00.002Z

I HEART Our Dishwasher

2010-02-23T21:24:00.004Z

Today I was the rather misnamed helping mummy at pre school. Apart from not having a uterus and being over a foot taller than any previous helper, I think I acquitted myself fairly well. At one point I had 5 children (only two known to me) clinging to my legs. I took this as a positive vote on my contribution.

The role of mummy helper involves rather a lot of washing up and this was a bit of a novelty because we got a dishwasher just before M'laddo was born. I'd never had truck with that kind of contraption before but it has changed my life. And for the better. Now days we see it as a drudge and a chore even unloading the thing, much less manually doing tonnes of washing up.

Back to pre school though and I was heartily scrubbing away at a sink that's apparently too low for actual helping mummys. As I've headed into my 30's, my hands get more and more chapped in the cold or when I'm constantly washing them (especially when Rule 1 is enacted). So today, after washing up 20 cups, as many plates, 10 paint pots and various other bits and bobs I sat back and had a good shufty at my hands.

They weren't in a great state to start with but by the end I had 9 cracks that were down to the flesh and ready to bleed once dry on my right hand and 3 on my left. I was hygienic, and would stress I didn't bleed on any of the washing up (it got worse when I got on to the paint pots) but even so, it made me appreciate our dishwasher even more.

Wordless Wednesday- The suggestion of duck

2010-02-17T21:53:00.001Z

I am cursed regularly by Hallmark

2010-02-14T21:30:00.002Z

On days like today I eschew the greetings card industry which is ever more pushing cards for every single occasion (I refused to buy a UN World Peace day card for anyone, a card too far).

No, I don't give my money to these institutions in return for a gaudy card purchased by thousands, I indulge in a bit of DIY. I was roundly ridiculed on Thursday by Big Dave at work as we strolled up the town for my quick trip into Paperchase to buy a blank card and envelope to make my own Valentines Day card for wifey. He called me a cheap-skate as he clutched his 3 Trueblood books with free card and gift wrap from Waterstones. The cheek!

Every Christmas and Valentines wifey gets an absolutely unique card that no one else in the world has ever had or will ever have.

Just one of the ways I try to remind her how absolutely special she is to me- love you wifey!

We remember now...

2010-02-14T20:12:00.003Z

A while back we were discussing things of import in the middle of the night and could remember nothing at the break of day.

Well, good news folks, I (or rather wifey) has remembered!

We were talking about D of E expeditions, and wifey remarked that in order to cut down every last ounce of weight from her rucksack, she even went as far as sawing off the handle of her toothbrush.

This captures the essential difference between men and women nicely. I remarked that instead of mutilating my toothbrush, I would have just left it at home and not brushed my teeth for a couple of days. Proper woodsman style you understand.

So you see, woman think differently from men. I'm not saying ones right and the others wrong, just different.

I'm not going to the pub

2010-02-12T09:46:00.002Z

I was going to the pub this evening. A rare and laddish night out with my buddy Miles. We attempt to do this once a month but its seldom that often we manage it.

Cask conditioned ales are quaffed, exotic bar snacks are consumed and we plot the righting of the worlds wrongs.

'Cept tonights outing has been cancelled as Miles hasn't managed enough decorating.

*SULK*

I can't see the wood or the trees

2010-02-10T13:53:00.001Z

I got up this morning in a very unobtrusive manner. My alarm went off at 6am, about an hour after the wee lass had her last bottle of the night so I was keen to make sure I didn't wake her. I got dressed and left the house in the dark.

It was still dark out when I got to the office and that was when I realised I'd completely forgotten my glasses.

I'm typing this with my nose an inch from the screen and my face screwed up. Didn't realise how short sighted I actually was!

A Cinema for St Albans- URGENT!!!

2010-02-08T20:42:00.002Z

For reasons best know to people who appear to not know much, the wonderful but derelict Art Deco cinema in St Albans has been ear marked for conversion into flats. Yet at the same time various pie in the sky schemes for pokey multiplexes on top of redeveloped car parks have come to naught.

Well, the owner of the absolutely fabulous Rex Cinema in Berkhampstead is trying to buy it and convert it into a proper cinema. You can read about it all here.

Yes, a commercial venture is trying to gather public money to do something, but lets face it, the Rex is awesome and its not as if the world of hard work and effort that James is attempting to take on is going to make him a mint in the short term. Or indeed the medium term.

The Tickin' Chicken Timebomb

2010-02-08T13:18:00.002Z

Yesterday I accidentally managed to feed the whole family a seriously undercooked roast chicken. I don't know why I felt the need to put accidentally in the previous sentence, it should hopefully be fairly obvious I didn't do it on purpose. I'm just not the sort of person who wakes up and says, I know today it's my aim to poison all those I love the most.

I added half an hour to the cooking time, and cooked it at a higher temperature than the cooking guide recommended. I did the juice test and the breast I sliced off for wifey, M'laddo and the wee lass looked fine. Unfortunately I gave them theirs whilst I cut mine up and that's when it appeared I'd poisoned us all. To add insult to injury, I even cooked the roast spuds in the chickens roasting dish. You know, just to make sure I got everyone.

One call to the doctors later, I was assured all we could do was sit down and wait for the poisoning to occur. If it did. There's an outside chance we wont all puke our guts up and get terrible runs but lets face it, this is real life and that's not going to happen is it?

Still, wifey was very understanding, which was more than I'd have been in her place.

The wait then, continues. I am considering doing a full twitter-thon of the impending doom, so you might want to consider blocking me ;)

World Wednesday- The Perils of Fridge Magnets

2010-02-03T07:20:00.002Z

Great ideas in the middle of the night

2010-02-02T20:23:00.003Z

We were lying in bed last night, both knackered but too tired to get to sleep easily. Wifey said something that I now can't remember which was going to lead on to some points that I now can't visualise but rest assured, it would have been bloody funny.

This is probably a lesson or something in remembering to write stuff down or a case in point that parents are slightly insane and have the memory of one of those bowls with teeny tiny holes in it.

But what it is overall, is flipping irritating...

Oi, Review Up

2010-02-01T21:03:00.002Z

Some of you might know I write for and do the backend for Mummy Reviews. Well I've shoved a review up on the Pogo Mini Printer today. I liked it, but if you want to know more, check out the review ;)

Hosting a website (rather than having it hosted for you on blogger or wordpress.com) is quite exciting. You get to play around with the layout and style a lot more, insert funky plugins that do cool stuff and generally have the feeling that you're doing more than just writing the content. Of course, content is king, and if you focus on making things look good, you'll lose out on the content.

But the feeling of satisfaction knowing you built it from the ground up is great :)

The End and the Beginning

2010-01-31T20:14:00.002Z

Sunday evenings are a funny old time. I'm one of those old fashioned types that thinks Mondays are the first day of the week. And for me, that makes the waning of Sunday a bit of a funny one. The working week has finished two days past and the weekend has usually been a busy one.

What then does the next week have to offer?

Monday- recover from the weekend
Tuesday- catch up on the work that should have been done on Monday
Wednesday- work hard til lunch time, that mentally celebrate that the half way point has happened
Thursday- struggle to work as the last few days catch up
Friday- mad rush of work in the morning, petering out to futility by about 3pm
Saturday- groggy due to staying up to an ill advised hour and wrangling small children nocturnally, day of family excitement and fun, with me attempting not to be
Sunday- reached some sort of equilibrium of tiredness and generally potter around in a satisfactory manner.

This week has been thrown a bit of course by a stinking cold I've developed that has seen me described as looking dreadful by more than one family member. Thanks for your words of support :)

A different perspective

2010-01-30T20:35:00.003Z

When you have children you get used to seeing the top of their head a lot and looking down on them. It's interesting to see the perspective that they look at you from.

M'laddo has an old camera we gave him to use, and I recently cleared out 242 pictures he's taken since August. The one to the left shows M'laddos intimate knowledge of my knees.

As he's got a bit taller now, the knowledge has moved up a bit and I've had to have the "Don't punch Daddy in the willy." conversation several times. On one occasion it had to be delayed for some considerable time as I was wheezing and had tears in my eyes.

The joy of spam

2010-01-29T22:13:00.001Z

With the exception of a few good (wo)men, the majority of comments I get are spam. Like most people really.

I've now decided that it has it's place- it's usually ever so polite and If you strip out the spamlinks, it seems so jolly and complemtary.

So comment spammers, keep it up!

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