tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84419599095774109072024-03-05T01:10:54.571-06:00Daddy Does the Dishes, Mommy Makes the MuhlaThis blog is hosted by a proud stay-at-home dad who loves what he does. It is also hosted by a highly motivated, goal oriented, loving working mom. We will blog on many different topics that effect our family in many different ways.Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-84729928800255814772010-06-12T09:27:00.003-05:002010-06-14T19:46:03.805-05:00My campout adventureI don't know how to set up a tent. There I have said it! Not proud of that fact, but that was the truth, until a couple of weeks ago. Sure I can help anyone that knows what they are doing, but actually setting one up on my own, I hadn't done that. Now I have and it was really easy. Being a city guy all my life, I never had a desire to camp, in fact the thought was anything but appealing. At 40 years old, I can say my opinion has changed. I am now looking forward to my next camping adventure.<div><br /></div><div>I went with Austyn, my 10 year old, and his boy scout troop, on an overnight to a state park close by. I really had no desire to go, but AJ was very excited and some of the other dads were going as well, so I didn't really think I had a choice. He is a Webelos now and parents aren't always required to go along on these trips. When he first heard about the campout, he politely told me that he did not want me to come as he wanted to do this on my own. Although I was a little disappointed, that my son didn't want me around, that quickly turned to excitement when I realized that I didn't have to camp out.</div><div><br /></div><div>About a week or so before the campout I got an email confirming all those attending the campout. You can understand my amazement when I read every dads name on the campout list except mine. I thought it was a campout for the boys so they could get used to being outdoors without us dads! Well...I didn't have much choice and after talking with AJ, I emailed back that I would in fact now be attending too. Man, was I excited.</div><div><br /></div><div>So the day came and I waited as long as I possibly could before leaving for the campout. One of my buddies that was already out at the park, kept texting me to find out when I would be there. Finally I decided, I couldn't put off the inevitable any longer and AJ and I packed up and headed out. It was a quick ride and we were at our campsite within a half hour. Oh the fun was about to begin! As AJ headed off to play touch football with the boys, I was left to complete the task I dreaded...tent set up. Wasn't this supposed to be about the boys doing things for themselves? I picked a good spot next to my buddy and got to work. Luckily for me the other dads were off doing their own things so no one would have to watch me as I messed up my tent. I made the mistake at looking at the other tents and how they well constructed they were and worried that mine would look like Charlie Brown's version. Surprisingly, it went much better than expected and within about 10 minutes, I had finished my tent without incident. It was at that point that I thought that maybe this night wouldn't be as bad as I thought.</div><div><br /></div><div>After filling up our air mattress and filling up the rest of our overnight supplies in the tent, I was ready to relax and enjoy the rest of my night with AJ. Now...what about food? That question was quickly answered when our two den leaders started pulling out all their cooking supplies. Just like Mary Poppins and her garment bag, these guys just starting pulling out an endless supply of cooking utensils, food, grills and more. I was in heaven and so were the boys...I mean the other dads. We ate so well that night. Not only did we eat well, but the leaders did everything for us! I don't even get that kind of service at home, very often. All my worries were gone and I was truly enjoying myself.</div><div><br /></div><div>The rest of the evening involved a campfire and lots and lots of smores. After the fire had gone out, AJ and I headed to bed in our tent. It was great feeling being close to him like this. Usually I have to share my attention with others, but not tonight. We stayed up for awhile just talking about the day and all the things that were on his mind. It was in that moment that I was feeling really bad about not wanting to go on this campout. In that moment, there is no where I would rather be!</div><div><br /></div><div>The next morning began just as the night before had ended. When I finally woke up at 8:00(I think I was the last to get up), breakfast was all ready and the den leader met me at my tent door with my plate! I was very eager to show my appreciation and scarfed it all down. After breakfast the leaders had some learning time for the boys followed by another football game. I decided to let AJ have fun and broke down the tent myself while he played with his buddies.</div><div><br /></div><div>After everyone was cleaned up we gathered for a closing talk. We talked about the best and the worst part of the campout. When it got to AJ, he made the campout complete for me. He said the best part was spending time with his dad and the worst part was listening to his dad snore last night. He filled my bucket to the top and I laughed so hard! He has another campout scheduled in August that I don't think I will be able to attend and that is a bummer for me because I will remember this one for a long time.</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-2507637158879808692010-05-12T13:53:00.006-05:002010-05-12T14:51:08.753-05:00Sometimes it is really hard to get out of a rutI love a rountine. I work best when I have a schedule to follow. My Palm Pre is my security blanket. I have all the kids schedules on there. I have access to all my important phone numbers. I have access to the internet at any moment. It makes me feel good to have this with me at all times. This keeps me on my schedule...I don't have to think, because my planner does it for me. In fact, it even reminds me when things are happening.<div><br /></div><div>This very organized schedule on my phone, allows me to stay focused...and stay in a rut. What is a rut? To me it is doing the same thing, over and over and over again. It means not trying anything new or leaving your comfort zone. This rut serves me well...most of the time. When it gets me in trouble is when staying in the rut is more important than the needs of my wife or family. Luckily, I have a great wife that reminds when I am getting too deep in the rut and helps to tow me out.</div><div><br /></div><div>About a month ago, the kids were on Spring Break and we decided to get away for a family vacation. Of course I say this like it was a very collaborative between my wife and I, but that is really giving me too much credit. I could talk about this for awhile, but isn't the main story today. Today, I really wanted to focus on the importance of getting away as a family.</div><div><br /></div><div>We decided to take a trip to Missouri. We saw Kori's college, University of Missouri, which she hadn't been back to since she left in 1991. We all loved hearing her stories and visiting parts of her history. I can't forget to mention our trip to the student bookstore where we stocked up on enough Mizzou stuff to hold everyone for awhile. We then headed down to Lake of the Osarks to a friend's rental property and spent 3 days there.</div><div><br /></div><div>We hiked a lot, explored a cave, went minature golfing(I won), ate good food, shopped and did some site seeing. It was a great trip, but not because of any of those things I just mentioned. It was a great trip because we were together as a family! Kori and I joke about creating memories, but it is true. What this trip was all about was creating memories for our family. These are the times and the trips that our kids will remember. They won't remember the numerous soccer practices that they went to or meetings we had to attend or dad's continual forgetfulness(I hope). They will remember the times we spent together as a family! They will remember how dad made them walk 2 extra miles because he missed a sign. They will remember that we let Austyn pee outside at a National Park instead of waiting until we got back to the car and the bathrooms. They will remember getting soaked by the rain and taking a picture under the natural bridge. These are the memories that will stick with all of us. These are the memories that will keep us all close. These are the times to remember when you get stuck in a rut. It doesn't matter what you do or where you go, but every once in awhile, change it up. Do something you don't normally do. Create memories for your kids. Don't worry, your schedule will be there when you get back. And it won't take long to get back in your rut. I think it is time for another trip!</div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span></div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAtIAsQca_964uAMvvdBWDejtC8dYuToxtW5Pyd1AOM0KWpGkfVX0HqcZnlR1tf_7q0_0FR0cQbqKhjSQ9JUIPYsi5Qu5rvCvh4ZgLbgqCeA2YdhNla8vqlZz4swP_rrfTOMncpElm2-M/s320/DSC_3869.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470527082318818" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 213px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRzq4b09eGTlqOWhiT-Ed-ZQh3eLfGTey8nuQ8BuniI2v4pLQ95beoIh2lEKraoHiGa7252wrKXXwoklnbku0U5uQ0pCTg7RsZ26FuEnWnBWYbSX9HcxHuXV3nndXaCiYt99Zk0bbEKn4/s320/DSC_4064.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470559356997570" /><div>Here we are at University of Missouri and at Bridal Cave</div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoLT8vtdggQuNKUgjyGqFTdOpqNqy5LeLADMigVrYD3MCbl9_LCEjM6EuwL2pu47ks8DeMyNpkgjo-WUsE1-uWVzauFyDS0tYhoH02lmAX7bRip9vjkToYxAWJaF0YVC6ROx13zRjP7HM/s320/DSC_3929.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470552150598610" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHfal1hR28r6ORmYXPqagITLTFDVE-9vpkXOz6RgRnAF_o20q1flGFUt1g0uCyoWy3JRAhFhj07fw6ObmSyquHTQtXtW4YJeo6cd2fTWpNMcwuZErWa3lciy9358w2tTs7iRSqhOs_okA/s320/DSC_3923.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470543675945954" />Kedzie took the top picture...we made her. The other picture shows where Mike should have stopped the hike</div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm5IYB1-keSJBE4dqOylXFJP3RFV_aFqFLr-6UQpvRpcLIgMoz_aGzp2uTMlUakWp5l_EYroyTv3ObZeLH-WnNBf1Q5MhG2XcfqRTohIvpjfjDCMMiDzzCbJHSdMIAl6_FX5jZq8y6M-8/s320/DSC_3912.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470539418741394" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheEnDXMUQvVgeOZJCtIJ2ZCFvAgr8y8miwWM9kIJ8ZNiymZ8g98onDVurna7JClsk8ZANv17-FmqKBEofUhrOI6qePJdaQ5Rpz9TUd6eqfPWR6Pt6ouG_TfckyaQaPDjhPccxzg7KzBhc/s320/DSC_4113.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470860357155346" /></div><div>This shows where we ended up after the hike...soaked and the other photo shows the kids at the end of the dock at our rental place<br /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-GXx6ESBUMbojWjsIs73RjI_tVN2G8G6XlRsUiuEQEd1EmE-gVH1Yh6dCruphbfAQa9-VRc7RW1eRMqwD_iAXWsGjBIJUbSPwy8r8stTz5e27QaGQCVsf9j1PlM5gZAFrhPULPUNIgvU/s320/DSC_4125.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470470868762978514" /><br />Last day we went to a water park. Had to throw this on in here.<br /><br /><br /></div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-8743978334746987722010-05-03T22:53:00.003-05:002010-05-03T23:57:49.441-05:00Everyone needs a little time awayMy apologizes to Brian Reid for such a lapse in blogging. Mr. Stay at Home Dad blogger gave me the good advice to blog on a reoccurring basis so followers could get used to reading at a certain time. Well...that hasn't happened! It is now over a month since I have blogged and I can't believe how fast time has flown by. Time to get back into it.<div><br /></div><div>Last month I got a weekend away from my family. It is a yearly event that I refer to as "The Boys Weekend." Once a year a group of us get together up in East Lansing, MI. for a fantasy baseball draft and also a little of reliving our past college days. It is something that each of us look forward to for various reasons. For me it is all about camaraderie with other guys. It is knowing for one weekend, I can let loose and just be. I don't have to worry about soccer games or dance competitions. I don't have to think if I have everything I need in the car for piano lessons or the band concert. This weekend, I just have to think about what I need. It is a good feeling...for a short time.</div><div><br /></div><div>In years past, I have regretted how I have acted during this weekend as I was stupid and drank too much. That doesn't even touch on how I left things at home. In recent years though, I have learned from my mistakes and I now stay in control. I make up for my controlled drinking with a total lapse in calorie counting. I eat enough calories during this one weekend to probably not eat at all the entire next week. This allows me to have the same amount of fun without any of the regrets on Sunday, except for the fact that my jeans are a little tighter. I know that when I come home from my weekend that I have to be ready to reconnect with the family. There is no checking out or being tired because I am hung over after being away for the weekend. That is a very acceptable tradeoff for my time away.</div><div><br /></div><div>Ok, so we now know how much I look forward to this weekend, but I also know the sacrifices this weekend places on my wife and family. In past years, when I wasn't so mature, I would just take care of my needs for the weekend and leave everything else at home to my wife. One year, I even forgot to buy groceries for the family and thought she could do it while I was gone! I have learned over the years what a responsible stay at home dad should do when he leaves his family for the weekend. This leads to a much better weekend for all.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am very thankful that my wife gives me this time! It rejuvenates me. It helps me stay connected with other men. I am passionate about fantasy baseball and it lets me continue to play a game I enjoy. It gives me some freedom that I otherwise freely give up for my family.</div><div>I think every spouse needs some time away to just be themselves. It, in the end, will be a benefit for the entire family. When I come home, I am more attentive to my wife, I am more even tempered with my kids and I feel better about myself. This weekend makes me realize all the gifts I have in my life and how lucky I am.</div><div><br /></div><div>So...to my wife, Kori...Thank you for giving me this weekend every year. This weekend makes me a better dad and a better husband. This weekend illustrates to me how great my life is and how fortunate I am. This weekend is about so much more than "The Boys Weekend," it is about me, something just for me. I can't wait till you start taking your weekend too. Hopefully you will get to experience all that I do and why it is so important to me. Maybe I will change the name of my weekend to "the me weekend." That seems more appropriate. I love you Kori!</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-40627684377554155822010-03-06T22:53:00.003-06:002010-03-07T00:45:30.235-06:00Driving with CharacterI got a ticket last night and I wasn't even speeding. Turns out that my tags on my license had expired. I had no idea that was the case. Obviously I will be handling this first thing Monday morning. It would have been no big deal if it was just me, heck, I could have even hide it from everyone...well, no, that isn't true...I digress. The point I was trying to make is, things are different when you get pulled over when your kids are in the car. That is what happened last night. <div><br /></div><div>In the past, when getting a ticket without any extra small bodies in the car, I hadn't been so mature about my ticket, just ask my wife. I didn't always treat people respectfully or handle my ticket with much class. So, I always wondered how it would be when the kids were in the car. Would I lash out at them? Would I show my anger? Or could I talk to them with maturity and handle the situation with class? I did all right on this one...I think, guess you'd have to ask my kids on this one. Didn't get mad, answered their questions and made it no big deal. Phew, I passed and I didn't even need a reality check from my better half.</div><div><br /></div><div>I think the bigger issue here goes back to one of my first thoughts...Could I hide this from everyone if no one saw it happen? I think that is what separates the guys from the dads. I have heard many times the quote that "character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking." I didn't always feel that way. I thought if I could get away with something without anyone knowing, then it wasn't really wrong. Eventually, those lies caught up with me and really got in the way of me becoming the husband I needed to be and the dad I sometime wanted to be. So, when my lies started to piling up, and the kids came along, knew it was more than time to be a stand up dad and husband.</div><div><br /></div><div>I decided that the legacy I wanted to leave for my family is to be, above all else, a great dad and husband. I couldn't do this by trying to pass off lies as the truth. There is another quote that says, "The faults of the father fall always on their sons"(and daughters). That isn't an option for my family. God has tested me plenty and I know I am far from perfect, but I know with His help, I will continue to be the dad with character.</div><div><br /></div><div>I have been a dad now for 13 plus years and have had my share of tickets. In fact, I have had one of our kids with me for my last three moving violations. It is kind of scary for me, as my oldest daughter opened the golf box and pulled out my registration without me asking as I fumbled for my license. I asked her how she knew how to do this. She said, "Dad I have done this before, remember." Well...she will be driving in a couple of years, so I guess I can call this a dad teaching moment. That's my story and I am sticking to it. Do I need to quote that last sentence?</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-91771677741814133102010-02-20T23:56:00.002-06:002010-02-21T01:03:09.638-06:00Love what your kids love, part 2Ok, I really wanted to get back to something I started talking about a couple of weeks ago. I got off track, but that was ok with me, because the message was good, but I knew I wanted to get back to this, so here we are.<div><br /></div><div>About 4 years ago, both of my girls danced at a local studio and I was there quite a bit with them both. In fact, I still can't listen to Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani as I heard it weekly being danced by the team when I was there for my girls' classes. Please don't say b-a-n-a-n-a-s! I got to know the dance team as they were there on the nights when Kedzie was tapping and Madi was learning her jazz rountine. For the most part, they were the average dance team, except for one team member, a boy. I remember thinking, and I am sorry to say this, "I wonder what his dad thinks about his dancing?" I know that I was immature thinking this wasn't the cool thing for a boy to do. I wondered if he got teased by his buddies for wanting to dance with a bunch of girls. I wondered if his dad was teased because his son dances. I felt all the stereotypes about what boys should or shouldn't do and dancing was one of the things that should be left to the girls. We had tried our son Austyn in dance and later our son Logan but neither liked it at all and I was totally fine with that. My opinion of boys in dance changed when I saw the end-of-the-year dance recital. Not only did that boy on dance team hold his own, he really stood out as a good dancer. Right then and there, I realized that boys could do anything girls could do and sometimes better!</div><div><br /></div><div>Fast forward ahead to the summer of 2008. Madison was taking a summer dance class at our studio in Nebraska. I took my then 6 year old, Logan, with me to watch. Next thing I know he is in the class with her and trying all the hip hop moves that she is doing. I signed him up for the class that day and both Madison and Logan took classes all summer. I really thought it was great exercise for Logan and a great skill builder for Madison. Little did I know that this class would open the eyes of the studio director and his teacher about his dancing. In fact, shortly after the class had ended, I received a call from the studio director, stating that they were so impressed with Logan, that they wanted him to join dance team and they wanted to audition girls to dance with him in a number that they would choreograph with him as the center of attention. I have to admit, those old stereotypes and my insecurities came racing back to the surface. A summer class was one thing, but joining dance team was a different thing all together. Then I remembered that boy at the old studio and decided it was up to Logan. </div><div><br /></div><div>Of course Logan said yes, or there would be no story and so began his dancing experience. I could go into all the dances and all the competitions and how much he loves it, but that is not the point here. The point is to love what your kids love! I am so glad that I didn't say he couldn't dance because he was a boy. I'm so glad that my own insecurities didn't make me worry about what other men would think because my son was a dancer. I am so glad that I asked my son if he wanted to dance because he shined on the dance team. </div><div><br /></div><div>He is dancing again this year in more numbers and in more styles of dance. He never tires of dancing and never gives me a hard time about practice. He really looks forward to his time at the studio. This is something he really likes! Of course I do have some male influence on him still. He does play basketball, soccer and baseball in addition to dance. Not too long ago he told me that his plan is to be a professional dancer and a professional baseball player. I am not sure how he plans to do this, but you can bet that I will support him 100%. One of his buddies on his basketball team heard he wouldn't be the game next weekend because he has his first dance competition. The boy laughed when Logan confirmed this. When we were walking to the car, he asked me why his friend laughed. I said I was sorry that happened and I didn't know why he laughed. Logan said, "He is probably just jealous because he doesn't know how to dance." I said, "You're probably right!"</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-15298201696754821972010-02-12T12:44:00.002-06:002010-02-12T13:24:48.154-06:00The home telephone vs. social mediaI remember a time when you would talk for hours on the home phone with friends. There wasn't much to say, since you had just seen them hours before, but that didn't stop the long conversations from taking place. You would talk until your parents got so mad that they would hang up for you or you would get the look that said, either hang up the phone now or I will cut the cord and you will never call anyone ever again. Do you remember that? Ok, well I wasn't one of those who abused the phone, but I had plenty of friends that did. As I became an adult and met parents with teenage kids, I would hear that same story told to me from the parent's perspective. I told myself when I become a parent, I will have strict policies about phone use. Only certain hours of the day could the phone be used for recreational use. Children needed to check in with me regarding all phone calls. All calls would originate from the kitchen and parents would be privy to all conversations. Well, I have kids that are into their teenage years now, so I was all ready with my phone rules. Unfortunately for me, the rules have now changed. I am now having to come up with new rules to deal with the way teens are communicating today.<div><br /></div><div>First came the cell phone. Actually, I have been in favor of my kids having one of these. With their ever increasing schedule, it is good to be able to get in touch with them, especially when dad knows he is going to be late for a pickup. That never happens, but knowing they can get ahold of me or vise versa is very important. Then came texting. Jury is still out on the importance of this for the well being of the kids. Things can be said in a text that wouldn't be said in person. Inappropriate texting is also a big issue for me. I check my kids text messages to make sure I know who they are talking to and what is being said. I have begun texting myself and find it to be an easy way to communicate with others. I started texting when my sister-in-law said it would be a good way to relate to my kids and she was right. It is kind of fun to send a quick message and the response from your kids is "you are a dork!" Picture mail is not something that we allow. With all the sexting going around, I totally wanted that restricted. I don't even send picture mail.</div><div><br /></div><div>The cell phone was my warm up to what would come next, social media. My wife is in the communication field and social media describes all those networking sites. For my daughter, that means facebook. When she turned 13, we told her she could have a facebook page. Actually, she didn't even want one, but some of her out of town friends had their own and they wanted to keep in touch with her, so we suggested that she get one. At first, it was just one word answers back and forth between a few girls, but now her friend list has grown and is almost more than mine. Now, not only do I need to check her text messages, I have to read her facebook page. You see, the rule was, that if she got a facebook page, I got her login and password and could check it anytime I wanted. That keeps her honest about what she writes, but lets her talk with her friends. We also have a rule about who she can be friends with. Her mom and I told her that just because someone wants to be her friend, it doesn't mean that she has to allow it, so she will ask us about some kids that ask to be her friend.</div><div><br /></div><div>I have been happy with how our kids have handled texting and now facebook. I think that is because we have given our kids good guidelines to follow and they know they will be held accountable for their actions. After reading some messages that were texted or posted on facebook, I know that some parents do not have these same guidelines with their kids. When kids aren't being held accountable, that is when problems arise. </div><div><br /></div><div>So, now we have new rules for texting and facebook. When I was a first time parent, I never imagined either of these two things. I suppose there will be new technology in the future that my wife and I will have to deal with and come up with even more rules and accountability. I am up for the challenge. If you ever want to talk about coming up with your own rules, feel free to call me at home. No one ever uses that anymore.</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-42506274924037616832010-02-04T13:07:00.003-06:002010-02-04T14:34:22.080-06:00Love what your kids loveGrowing up, the one thing I loved to do most of all was play baseball. In the summer, I would ride my bike all over town to find a game. Yes, I went without a helmet and sometimes would ride a couple of miles to find a lob ball game. Times were different then, but I digress. Come wintertime, I tried to pass the time with baseball cards and my legos, but neither could compare. I couldn't wait for the snow to melt and get out there with my friends to play. I played all summer long with some guys I still call friends today. I have lots of great memories of those times and when I became a dad, I couldn't wait to share those experiences with my kids. <div><br /></div><div>I started with the girls at a young age and coached their t-ball teams and later their coach pitch softball teams. I know they enjoyed the time with Dad, but softball wasn't really their favorite sport. Before long, I was loving soccer and basketball as much as they were. In fact, I started getting into watching and now really look forward to their games. Baseball was a part of me, but didn't mean it had to be a part of them. Besides, I thought, I still have my boys. </div><div><br /></div><div>I picked up with them as I had with the girls and they quickly took to it and really liked it. Watching both of them develop gave me hope that one would turn into the next left-handed phenom pitcher for the Cubs. I guy can dream, right? Well, that might not be their dream and I have come to realize that I am fine with that. They are both looking forward to the baseball season, but they also are looking forward to soccer starting next month, the dance competition coming up in a couple of weeks, finishing the "Battle of the Books competition" novel and the Jump Rope-a-thon.</div><div><br /></div><div>What I have realized over time as a dad is that it isn't about me anymore. It is about them and helping them become the best people they can be and support them to find what really brings them joy. If it is sports, great, but if it is something else all together, that is great too! So many parents today don't feel connected to their kids and in my opinion it has to do with meeting the kids where they are and not where the parents want them to be. If kids have passion for something appropriate, it has to be encouraged. They can't be told "no" because it is deemed unimportant. Kids need to know that their parents have their back and that they are encouraged and supported at home. Parents can do so much good for their kids when they love what their kids love.</div><div><br /></div><div>Funny thing about blogging...I came into this today focused on writing about something else, but this just flowed today. I do feel passionately about this topic and found I had more to write about it than I had thought. Good news is, I feel really passionate about my next topic too, so check back next week for a follow-up. Thanks for reading.</div><div><br /></div><div>Mike</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-4384201074032481082010-01-28T14:22:00.003-06:002010-01-28T14:37:39.815-06:00A is better than B or is itOk, so last week my oldest was in the middle of middle school basketball tryouts. She made the A team last year as a seventh grader. That whole week I kept running down the girls and thinking about where she would get placed. Figured she would make the A team, but just was hoping that would happen for her. I never did make an "A" team and I guess I just wanted that for her. Well, she made it and actually had a very good season. Unfortunately, her extra playing time came because one of the other posts on the team got hurt. She took advantage of her opportunity and was awarded "the Most Improved Player" on the team. Proud moment for dad and a very reassuring feeling for her as a player.<div><br /></div><div>This year, bigger stakes...8th grade basketball. LOL. There were a lot fewer girls this year and the coach, a personal friend, decided to have two teams. Again, I went through all the names and worried about how her placement would affect her mentally. I figured that by knowing her work ethic and her ability, she would make the A team again, but just didn't know if the numbers would work in her favor. The coach delayed the posting of teams 3 extra days! I don't know if it was harder on me or my daughter. Anyways, when that day came, I just gave it up to God and said He knows what is best for her. If the B team, great. If the A team, great.</div><div><br /></div><div>Turns out it ended up being the best of both worlds! She was one of two players selected to play on both teams. She will gets lots of playing time on the B team and still be able to contribute on the A team. It even went further in that our friend, her coach, pulled her aside and said she wants her to step up and lead the B team! Ok, I say that to her all the time! Know what she does? She rolls her eyes at me! Know what she says when her coach says it? I am really going to step up because that team will need me!</div><div><br /></div><div>So the moral of the story? Stop obsessing over things you can't control, Mike! They are keeping you from thinking about things that are actually important! I don't know why, but these posts always turn into a learning experience for me. Some people keep a journal...I just blog about it. I will keep you posted on how her season progresses. Hopefully I won't yell at any refs.(See previous posting)</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-42582672769693945182010-01-13T11:06:00.002-06:002010-01-13T11:46:03.465-06:00Boys where prohibitedSunday afternoon I was performing my normal duties as unpaid taxi driver when something was said that made me stop and realize that not everyone is as old as I am. My daughter, Madison was riding "shotgun" because she is now old enough to do so. She had switched off my "80's on 8"(for those XM subscribers, you know what I am talking about) and turned on Radio Disney. Atleast that is better than some of the crap she likes to listen to and since my 7 year old Logan was in the car too, I reluctantly approved the music choice. By this point, Logan had already put on his headphones and was watching some random movie I had thrown into the van DVD player earlier that week and was no longer available for conversation. We had finished up with basketball for the day, church was a distant memory for the kids and the two had just finished a couple hours of dance practice...yes on a Sunday. I had turned my attention to making conversation with Madison. This can be a hard task as she is 12 and doesn't always want to talk to her dad. "How did dance go today?" "Fine" She answers a text. "Are you two getting the hang of it?" "Yes" Another text comes in and she answers that. More questions and same one word answers. I decide I will try again after my favorite Taylor Swift song, "Hey Stephen" comes on. We both start singing and she doesn't mind my rendition. We have a connection! Yes! After the song ends and both of us are laughing and I decide I need to concentrate on the road...yah right! Some kind of Radio Disney contest comes on and I half listen, but really I am thinking about what I am going to do when I get home. Then the question comes that can turn the tide, how will I handle this? I really want to laugh, but if I do, what will she feel? It is a honest question and I don't want to embarrass her. I keep my cool and take everything in stride.<div><br /></div><div>"Dad, what does it mean when they say 'Boys where prohibited'?" Oh, you mean "void where prohibited." I went on the explain what void meant and what the context of that statement meant in relation to the contest. I was actually surprised that I was able to pull that off without any laughter or kidding involved. Guess I knew how I would have felt if someone had laughed at me for saying something like that.</div><div><br /></div><div>I think at that moment, I experienced a God moment in my life. He was saying to me that I can't make assumptions about what my kids know. He was saying to be a father and teacher first and a jokester second. He was saying even though our kids are getting older, they are still kids and we have to treat them as such. Not expect or demand so much. Love them for who they are and not for what we want them to be. Although church had ended hours ago and God wasn't in the kids minds, at that point, He was in mine!</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-41140181368048665572010-01-06T11:38:00.004-06:002010-01-06T12:14:06.732-06:00Cold sweats....not good!Well, kids started back to school Monday and I was thrown back into the routine. No more staying under the heating blanket until I couldn't take it anymore in the morning, no more days of nothing to do and no where to go and no more hanging out with my kids and wife all day. Back to reality! So I thought. The kids have a snow day already! It is Wednesday and the kids have been watching TV for about an hour and a half already. Time to crack the whip...Well, I'll wait until I finish the posting.<div><br /></div><div>As I type, I find myself again guilty about my lack of consistency in these posts. I thank those of you who are still coming around to read my random thoughts of my life and I promise to be more consistent with my postings in 2010. </div><div><br /></div><div>I am happy this is a blog and not some organized paper as I would really get marked down for not being on subject. What I want to talk about today is my oldest daughter and the cold sweat I experienced last week. Between Christmas and New Years, she was scheduled(atleast she thought) to get her braces off. It all started with her last appointment before Christmas when they said, in 2 weeks when the retainers come in, you can get your braces off. Well, 2 weeks was right after Christmas and she began asking me when her appointment would be. I started calling the ortho. 2 days after Christmas to find out if they had gotten her retainers in. After 2 days of calling, they finally called us and said the retainers were in and they could fit her in on January 11th to remove them. January 11th! That wasn't going to work! They had another office about a half hour away and they could take them off on December 31st. Much better, but the time was 8:20 in the morning, which she was not thrilled about, but she wanted them off, so we took it! Luckily that day was one of the few "no new snow days" that we have had in Nebraska this winter which made the trip possible.</div><div><br /></div><div>We got there on time, which in itself was good news, with the early arrival time. They took her back right away and I busied myself by cleaning up my iphoto, which I don't think I had done all year. After about an hour, she was all done and she and the hygienist came out. She had retainers in both the top and bottom. She talked funny as her tongue was trying to get used to the retainers in her mouth. I didn't notice that as much as I noticed my young daughter didn't look so much like my little girl anymore, she looked like a young women.</div><div><br /></div><div>This "young women" concept was illustrated more fully for me that night when we were having friends over for New Years Eve. As we were preparing food and drinks for the night, she was showering and getting ready. When she came down and walked into the kitchen, the cold sweat began immediately for me! I couldn't believe what I was seeing! She looked atleast 16 to me and more beautiful than I had ever seen her. I tried to keep my composure, but the sweats had taken over my body. My thoughts went immediately to what boys would think of her new look and the thoughts in general of boys. Cold sweats consumed every part of me. Trying to make a taco dip being consumed by cold sweats is a hard task. "Do the green onions come next or the tomatoes?" She is never dating! I was somehow able to keep my composure, finish the taco dip and not let on to my wife or my daughter all the thoughts I was having about boys her age!</div><div><br /></div><div>Not sure how to end this blog because no matter what I do, she isn't going to stop growing up. At least at this point, she really isn't that interested in boys, so I have that going for me. Maybe I can forget about all this stuff for awhile, oh wait...there is an 8th grade dance this spring! I'm screwed.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-56165489364817442132009-12-15T08:45:00.002-06:002009-12-15T09:03:53.950-06:00It must be hard to be number 4<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2hStqIWyawn-HPBqwjtsO3nyckRDZh9DdgS8iH16MnAVguW-xnqXTpRxuwdbZV_1FsvVnh20usy9hie_pxD_L3xUT1n1xdVXzSK1g9wophpgamSxBX1ToJmg28nDPiNnx7pDd__0HVEs/s1600-h/img223.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 229px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2hStqIWyawn-HPBqwjtsO3nyckRDZh9DdgS8iH16MnAVguW-xnqXTpRxuwdbZV_1FsvVnh20usy9hie_pxD_L3xUT1n1xdVXzSK1g9wophpgamSxBX1ToJmg28nDPiNnx7pDd__0HVEs/s320/img223.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415474261954587506" /></a><br /><div><br /></div><div>This weekend we were out at the mall for 3 of our kids that had a piano recital. It was nice. They had a nice baby grand set up and the kids played Christmas music for about an hour. When it was all over with the older kids were asking about food. Seems to always happen in our family. After any activity, doesn't matter what time of day or if they have just eaten, as soon as the activity is over, they are all asking about food. We had planned on treating them this time, as a reward for the great concert they had just preformed. After the restaurant debate had ended and we were all getting on our coats, it occurred to me that Logan had not seen Santa yet this year. In previous years, when more of the kids were younger, we had seen Santa atleast twice by now. I can't believe that I hadn't remembered to take him before now! What a bad dad I was!</div><div><br /></div><div>Luckily, the mall we were in did have Santa for the day so, I took my son and we got in line. It wasn't a long line as Santa lines go and I could tell Logan was excited. He kept talking to himself, trying to remember all the things that were on his list. He wanted to make sure he got it all right. He didn't care that his brother and sisters weren't going up there with him(they had already seen him earlier this month, wink, wink), he wanted this to be the perfect conversation. As I stood there watching him, I thought I could have really blown it if I hadn't remembered to take him! I felt so guilty about the whole thing that I even bought the picture for him to keep to remember he got to see Santa this year.</div><div><br /></div><div>It can be really hard to remember to do those little things that came more naturally when all the kids were younger. I don't want my younger kids to go into therapy when they are older because "Mom and Dad never took pictures of me as a kid." Hopefully, remembering Santa will help me to avoid the therapy sessions. Oh, let's face it, I'll find another way to screw up my kids. All parents do...right?! </div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-6847019620158862252009-12-08T11:09:00.002-06:002009-12-08T11:33:51.382-06:00Time away is good, just throws you off your routineOk, the one thing I have been saying is that I would be consistent with my blogging and I really have a desire to be that way and make a go of this blog, but there are many things that get in the way. I give a lot of credit to those bloggers that have stayed consistent for years. <div><br /></div><div>Several weeks ago, right around the time I stopped blogging, my wife and I got away by ourselves for a weekend away from the kids. I would totally recommend this to any couple who hasn't done it in awhile! It is such a great feeling to be with the one you love and not have to worry about what the kids are doing. I have to admit this trip away is a long time coming. Long story, made very short, I didnt' go with my wife on a work trip to San Francisco many months ago. This is a decision I have regretted and am so glad that we finally got away. You see, when you have four kids it is really to forget about spending time with your wife because your kids' lives are so busy.</div><div><br /></div><div>We didn't go that far away, but that wasn't the point. The point was to spend time with my wife and get back to what is really important. We are both so busy every day and when we finally see each other at the end of the day, the energy we have for each other, is most times, lacking. </div><div><br /></div><div>I have committed to dating her monthly and intend to follow through on this. I just set up my date with her for December and am excited about spending time with her. She is one of the few that laugh at my silly comments or stupid jokes. You would think this would be an easy decision and would happen every month, but it is so easy to get into a rut and focus my attention on the needs of the kids. Times are changing and priorities are getting changed.</div><div><br /></div><div>I would love to hear about any ideas that any of you have about how you keep the love alive in your relationship. I should clarify that by saying, keep it clean. I will share things that I come up with and that way, maybe I can help spark other relationships as well. I don't have all the answers, so I need help. Please comment so I can become a better husband.</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-69260540306821035782009-11-16T22:01:00.003-06:002009-11-16T22:32:48.398-06:00I learned from my daughter this weekend!Ok, so I like to do this blogging stuff early in the morning, but that just didn't work out for me today, so I want to make sure I do it. Afterall, Brian Reid, Rebel Dad himself, said you have to be consistent and I don't want to fall off the wagon already. <div><br /></div><div>This weekend was much better than I had expected. I ended up going with my 13 year old daughter on a church retreat. We left Friday night and were there most of Saturday. At the convention I had committed to my Omaha SAHD buddies that I would attend a DNO meeting that night. They scheduled it around me, so I couldn't cancel on them. So, we told the youth director at our church, that she wouldn't be going. Then two days later, my wife's other plans didn't work out, so she was going to go with her, but they would have to be late because of her job obligations. My daughter was fine with that, so I emailed the director and said we were now in.</div><div><br /></div><div>I thought things were set, and I was happy how thing were turning out. I had Friday night free and my daughter and wife would get some alone time. Then I found out, through my email list, that the DNO wasn't going to be well attended at all and it looked like about 3 to 5 guys were going to be available. Priorities, priorities, priorities...drinks with a couple guys or quality time with my daughter. I chose my daughter. I am so glad that I did!</div><div><br /></div><div>I emailed the director again and said plans had changed for the third and last time. I was going to take Kedzie! This freed up my wife for another work obligation and allowed the two of us to go with the group on time to the retreat.</div><div><br /></div><div>Friday night was pretty laid back with most of the kids figuring out the layout of the land and the bunkhouses. The parents too were just getting aquatinted and adjusted to the routine for the next 18 hours. We had some team building, some Bible time, a campfire and then snack time before bed. The cabin we were in fell asleep early, much early than most, from what I was told, so I got a good night sleep...as well as one can sleep in a bed that is too short for you. I never knew what tomorrow would have in store for me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I don't wake up well in the morning and it usually takes me awhile to want to talk or socialize with anyone. That was again the case Saturday morning. The boys in my bunkhouse were up early. In fact, one had finished off a Dr. Pepper before 7:30 in the morning. After a hot shower and a change of clothes I was ready for the day. Headed down for breakfast and looked forward to hearing about my daughter's night.</div><div><br /></div><div>She came in shortly after I had and filled me in on the late night adventures in her cabin. She fell asleep early, but the other girls stayed up way to late to be up already. Once all the kids and adult leaders had entered the room, the director stood up and asked for a volunteer to lead the morning prayer. I thought I could do it, but wanted to see if one of the kids would do it. The director pointed behind me to the kids table to one of the kids who had volunteered. I bowed my head to listen intently to the prayer. I thought it would be one of the simple but appropriate prayers we heard last night for dinner, but it wasn't any thing like that.</div><div><br /></div><div>All of a sudden my daughter started praying! She started thanking God for the day, for the young disciples that were there, for the learning that all of us will experience, that how we all want to be closer to God, that the leaders will help to teach them how to be better Christians. I tried to focus on everything she said, but it got hard, because I was crying. Not just little tears, but big, wet, joyful tears. My daughter, a 13 year old, was praying in front of a bunch of strangers. She stood there proud, confident and with conviction and delivered those words for all to hear. I didn't care what else happened that day, my life was better because I had attended this retreat with her! </div><div><br /></div><div>God worked in her and in all the plans of that weekend to make it possible for me to share in that moment with her. I don't think she even knows how that moved me. I am going to tell her and thank her for her words. I learned how to be a better Christian that weekend and it wasn't from listening to a pastor or some biblical scholar. I learned from my daughter. Praise God.</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-57837026235344576972009-11-09T12:26:00.002-06:002009-11-09T12:56:41.841-06:00Sports..why do I care so much?I mentioned pushing my kids in sports in my last blog, so I thought it appropriate to talk about it now. I push my kids to be athletes! I am not proud of it...well, maybe sometimes. I think sports are important in a kid's life and I want them to become conditioned and love sports like I did. Is there anything wrong with that? No...not until it goes over the edge. I like to teeter at that edge. <div><br /><div>For some reason I think that these kids should do thing flawlessly. I never was perfect, but that doesn't occur to me when I am sitting there watching the game unfold. I really get crazy at times. Now I am not like those parents who yell at the players or say much to the refs, but I do say things that I should keep to myself. Why is that? I am not a bad person or think my kids are the stars of their teams, but I can't control myself. I can feel my blood pressure raise and a big knot in my stomach when the game isn't going well. Sometimes I have to walk away from the game because I get too heated. I don't want to be like this, but I don't know how to be anything else. I even had a ref tell me last year, "Relax, Dad, this is only a 7th grade game."</div><div><br /></div><div>When my wife and I actually get to go to one of our kid's game together, the car ride usually consists of a talk that we have about how to control my emotions during a game. Well, it is more like my wife telling me to be supportive of our daughter and keep the other comments to myself. I say, "I'm really going to be quiet this game," but that never happens. I see some of the other parents who sit and watch silently as the game goes on never showing any emotion and I want to say, "How do you do that!" But then I turn back to the game to see what I just missed. I know there is some happy medium, but I don't know how to get there.</div><div><br /></div><div>The funniest thing about my reactions at sporting events is that in any other setting, I keep my thought and emotions to myself. I avoid conflict like the plague. Just ask my wife about that. Maybe she will blog about that sometime. So what is it about sports that brings it out in me? When I was growing up, baseball was my life. I could have practiced it all day! I loved it and couldn't wait to go to a game! I talked all the time on the field and many times would annoy the other team with all my talk. I was a good player, but never was great. My parents were very encouraging to me as a player and heard often how proud they were of me. Only once did I ever hear anything negative from my dad during a game, when he yelled at one of my teammates to "take the piano off your back." Maybe his passion for sports is where I got my passion for sports. I was hoping as I turned 40, I would mellow out some, but so far it hasn't happened.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am writing about this to hopefully start a dialog about how others with kids that are in competitive sports deal with their emotions during games. At the end of the day, I want to be known as the dad who always supported his kids in whatever they wanted to do. There is that point when you can go to far and I am nervous that someday I will go there. Maybe by just putting the words down for all to read will be all that it takes to keep me and my emotions in line.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div></div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-36679486582072747912009-11-02T08:03:00.003-06:002009-11-02T08:48:21.121-06:00Halloween isn't what it used to be!What ever happened to the time when you would trick or treat until the homeowners actually turned off their lights and you had to go home? Or when you had to stop at home to empty your plastic pumpkin so you could go trick or treat some more? Or when you would change your costume half way through the evening and trick or treat at the same homes again(well, maybe I was the only one to do that)? The point is, that Halloween has changed and I don't like it as much.<div><br /></div><div>Maybe it is just my kids, but after an hour, they are done. I keep seeing all these house that they haven't gone to and think, I bet they have good candy! Unlike my pushing of my kids into sports(another day for that story), I decide that candy isn't worth it and I take the kids home. Maybe I need to do what many of my neighbors do. They drive their kids around the neighborhood in golf carts! The dads are in the front with some good tunes blaring and beers in their hands as they pull up to each house and the kids in back get off and run to the door. </div><div><br /></div><div>Maybe it is just the neighborhood we live in, but I must have seen 10 golf carts out on Saturday night. Each cart had it's own flare. One had big oversized tires, one had had a rain/wind protector around it, one was all decorated in team colors, but it was dark and I couldn't make out the team logo. One actually had lights, so you could see it coming in the dark. I saw a not-so-sophisticated vehicle too, but it wasn't a golf cart; it was a lawn tractor that had a trailer attached. On the trailer the dad had put folding chairs and he was pulling about 6 dads and kids. The best site I saw all night though was a pick-up truck pulling a long trailer with at least 10 parents sitting on it. What were they doing? They were throwing candy to the kids! I said next year, we should just have a neighborhood parade for Halloween and the kids sit on the side of the street and all the home owners throw candy to the kids! Talk about no effort for the kids! The one part of that parade vehicle that did make me really happy was seeing a friend, who is recovering from cancer, get to ride in the cab and and enjoy the festivities with his family and friends.</div><div><br /></div><div>Don't get me wrong, I have no issues with anyone celebrating the way they want for Halloween. For me, it is just really hard to get used to that. In my opinion, the fun is running from one house to the next, trying to beat your buddy to the door bell. It is the one night of the year that it is ok to run through the neighbor's yard and not have to use the sidewalk. It is that one night when you ring the doorbell and you aren't prepared to give your speech about how if they help with your magazine drive, it will help you get a better education. All you have to do is say "trick or treat," and you get free candy.</div><div><br /></div><div>I will admit that I have fun on Halloween. I am glad that I have a couple of kids that are young enough for me to go out with them. Sure I like to steal their Reese's Peanut Butter cups when they aren't looking, but more importantly for me, it love to see their expressions and joy in their face when they get something they really like or when at the end of the night, they want you to hold their candy bag in one hand and they want to hold your other hand as you stroll back home. Life is good! Plus, another year without a razor blade, needle or other foreign object in the loot! 39 years and counting!</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-35494737151944465492009-10-26T11:02:00.003-05:002009-10-26T11:30:53.345-05:00Jump rope a-thon is a priorityWell, for the first time I had to make a decision to have my daughter skip a basketball game in favor of her dance team practice. Did I like to make this decision...no. Was it the right decision...yes. I say it was the right decision, but I am not sure I really believe that. For me, I would rather have her play basketball, but I guess it isn't what is important to me...right?!<div><br /></div><div>The way it works in Elkhorn is the tryouts for the next season of basketball take place about a week after the basketball season ends, which is in April. The season doesn't start until October. Madison really didn't want to play basketball, but both my wife and I encouraged her to tryout and she could decide if she wanted to play if she made one of the teams. Well, she made the second team and decided that she did want to play. Then, later in the summer, around July, she also decided she wanted to be on her dance studio's dance team. This is where it gets sticky...</div><div>Both dance and basketball are on Saturdays.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am friends with the Director at the studio and she has been very good to me and our kids(our youngest son, Logan, also dances on the team). When this conflict became evident, I was quick to talk with Sandi about our conflict. She has been good about trying to schedule around our kids other conflicts, but just couldn't do it this weekend. So, my dilemma was, does she skip her dance number and get an unexcused absense or does she skip her basketball game and possibly leave her team short handed. I decided to have her miss her game, but wasn't happy about my decision.</div><div><br /></div><div>My wife disagrees with trying to do so much on Saturdays for Madi and has talked about her quitting basketball. I have told her that that is not an option. I have seen the effects of kids quitting team sports and the pressure that puts on other kids that stay with the team and I won't be part of that. This decision making goes back to when I was a kid and has stuck with me ever since. When I was a kid, I participated in a jump rope a-thon with a team of friends. Shortly after signing up for this event, I found out that baseball tryouts were at the same time! I wanted to go to the baseball tryouts in the worst way! I wanted to drop out of the jump rope a-thon. My parents wouldn't let me! " You can't let down your team," they told me. I knew this had to be hard for my dad too as he was a huge supporter of me in baseball and a great baseball player in his time. I would imagine he felt much the same way I did!</div><div><br /></div><div>So, I am going to do my best to manage these sports going forward, communicating with both coaches and trying to make the best of a stressful situation. Quitting is not an option. I am going to continue to make decisions that are in the best interest of my daughter and not those that would make me the happiest. I am hoping by operating this way, that my daughter can learn a valuable lesson that will stick with her as my jump rope a-thon did for me. Next April, maybe we will skip the basketball tryouts all together. That was really hard for me to type!</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-83011713422643016172009-10-19T09:25:00.007-05:002009-10-19T10:18:20.910-05:00How I came up with the blog nameI know it is kind of early in this whole process to tell you all about how I named this blog, but I thought it was important to do so. This blog takes most of it's title from a book that was written about me and my role as a full time at home dad. If you think that is the best part, it isn't. You see the book was written by my wife as a way to honor me as a full time dad! That is the best honor I have ever received! In a small way, I want this post to be a way to say thank you to her for doing this for me! <div><br /></div><div>When she finished the first book, she didn't stop there, as she wrote two more books about me as a positive dad in our kids lives. This turned into quite a family affair as her sister illustrated the three books for her and we self-published them, with some financial assistance from her parents.</div><div><br /></div><div>After publishing these books, we had boxes of them in our garage. Now...how to get them to the people that would want to buy them. That proved to be a task that was harder than I thought, and to be honest, life was an excuse as to why I didn't have more time to market these books to publishers and consumers. I talked last week about the Stay at Home Dad Convention. As part of my involvement, we decided to donate books to all those who attended the convention. I am really glad I did as I got great feedback from the dads and it has renewed my interest in getting the word out about the books.</div><div><br /></div><div>Sure, it would be nice to recoup the money that we invested into the project and get rid of some of the boxes that fill our garage, but more than that, I want my wife to write again! She says she has a couple more book ideas already written down on paper and we already know a great illustrator, so we really just need a little capital influx to get this all going again. If you are a publisher reading this, we would love to talk with you. LOL.</div><div><br /></div><div>Some of you that already have the books, I am sorry if this next part is old news, but I wanted to take a few sentences and write about each book.</div><div><br /></div><div>This was the first book my wife wrote and this one is specifically written about me as a stay at home dad. This is also where the first part of my blog title comes from. It is called Daddy Does the Dishes and Other Daddy Deeds. It tells about all the things Dad does while Mom is at work.</div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 285px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWBbbbd1w00Xvvhakc7y13NxQUIGDyKSC_ldMMzCE0U7g8J-blPyIdgM1Hg13K7SpfEX83Bf-SDV6bWEs_FTWG9mZATrsa8RJeUNK_lpmyEfs6It_B72G-fMWzB4tnwNydoKIDu8VB4Gk/s320/img005_2.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394323144085520034" /></div><div><br /></div><div>This next book came from something my kids said during the summer Olympics. It is called, My Daddy Can Touch the Moon. It had to do with the still rings in men's gymnastics and they thought that I could do the routines as well as those gymnasts. This is a story of those things dads can do and the special powers they possess. </div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgm2FzIHI4EgatXGgDKskpb3vXpeIg1h1h9KOqMzx7CLIjFCjq67c71HuZY9D6DTz20eiRhOHORE-XINK5WmoaXi4kUlvGQokdFv2AX3Al0m1moCT34C0q007m5Z-9lUhNuMMZ2jojDCeg/s320/img001.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394324062331285922" /></div><div><br /></div><div>The third, but certainly not least book is called, My Daddy is Supersillious. This book is all about how much fun it can be to be silly with your kids and how those are things that they will remember.</div><div><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 315px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiF349QJehTZ8EkYvlNEM2-eXbON19NipcjxAf4ggr9xFs2lr-ssJvCDvmMC0uoG6a2o3S7LTCKo2K6VeN3Sg9DTKv0kLTfsvv5pqbqBqtNlAQU8j9MOc-KytLVYrqkBJ_afWadCvlsNJc/s320/img003.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394327045748697954" /></div><div><br /></div><div>Ok, well that is a quick run down on the books. Thank you for reading all the way to the end. If you are interested in getting a set of your own, I think I can find a set or two around here. LOL. Please email me at homedaddio@cox.net or through the blog. $28 gets you all three books, shipping included. I will even have my wife sign them for you and include a personal message. My friend Robb was mad because his copies weren't personalized like that. We have learned from our mistake, so Robb I owe you a new set, dude!</div><div><br /></div><div>Thank you for letting me take the time to tell you about this special tribute that my wife has paid to me. My hope is that by raising our kids the right way, I will be able to honor her and her commitment to this family!</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8441959909577410907.post-86293497420563522882009-10-12T10:07:00.003-05:002009-10-12T10:31:21.569-05:00Stay at Home Dad Convention was AwesomeWaking up at 7:00am on Saturday was not an easy task for me. It was Oct. 10th, and there was about an inch of snow on the ground!!! Our bedroom is freezing(which probably will be another post) and all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed. I did that for about 10 minutes before I decided I didn't have a choice. Saturday was the Stay at Home Dad Convention in my town, Omaha. I really hadn't done anything to help the local guys out. They had worked extremely hard on this and I wanted to be there to support them. After my shower and putting on warm clothes I felt much better. Still kept complaining about the weather and the driving conditions, which got me a very unsympathetic response from the other side of the bed. With that kick in the butt, I was off.<div><br /></div><div>Driving down was like I thought it would be. Omaha forgot to get their snowplows ready on time or they just didn't believe it would snow. I saw a car spin out and get hit by about 3 other cars going the other direction. Glad it wasn't on my side, because I was running late and didn't need an accident to slow me down anymore. I got down to the Durham museum a little after 8:00 and helped to get everything set out for registations. My involvement was minimal, but I was glad to help out where I could.</div><div><br /></div><div>Guys arrived by 8:45 and the convention started pretty much right on time. Right from the beginning I was impressed with the work and the thought that went into this convention. You can tell these guys really wanted to do this up right. Afterall, we had dads come in from all over the country as well as Canada. The speakers were knowledgable, the breakout sessions were helpful and the food was great! Everything was top notch. I was really proud to be part of the group that put on such a great convention!</div><div><br /></div><div>I think for me the best part is meeting new dads from across the country and also right here in Omaha. Getting an opportunity to share stories and get connected really makes you feel a part of something. In fact, I came home after the convention and looked up a lot of these guys and friended them on facebook. I looked up dad blogs and now follow them. I went to Vista Print and made my own business cards to hand out when I meet other stay at home dads. The convention was a great opportunity for me to recommit to the stay at home dad movement. Well, movement might not be the right word, but I want to be more involved in this group and as my wife would say, in this space.</div><div><br /></div><div>I would like to thank all the Linomaha Dads that worked so hard to put this convention on. I would also like to thank all the dads that traveled to Omaha to be part of this last weekend. I know some of the dads already said they are coming again next year. If we get all of them to return and can add to our numbers, it will only help more dads out there feel connected and a part of something bigger than their own home and family.</div><div><br /></div><div>This weekend has inspired me to start blogging about my family and our life. I have had this blog set up for over a year, but never knew how to start it off. This weekend was the perfect way to get it going. Besides, I am waiting for my laudry to finish. Good timing, just heard the buzzer. Guess the clothes need to get folded.</div>Homedaddiohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15726792364842839443noreply@blogger.com4