I thought I’d work on a big list of ideas, but I kept coming back to one thing in my mind: pay attention.

The best way to spoil your kids with love is to slow down and pay attention to them. I am guilty of focusing on cooking and cleaning my messy house and not really listening, or thinking about a problem at work while my son is talking to me, but I am working on slowing down and focusing my energy.

Use the symbol of a heart as a reminder all year. When you see a heart, bring your thoughts to your kids, and ask yourself, am I doing everything I can? Think back to when you were a kid. Can you remember talking to the grownups and feeling that they weren’t really listening? Remember how small that made you feel? Don’t make your kids feel small. Take a minute to stop what you are doing, sit with them, ask how their day was, and really listen. Don’t interrupt, don’t watch TV, really look at them while they are talking. Ask their opinion about what’s going on in the world. Kids are smarter than you think, and they have great ideas. This doesn’t mean you stop doing everything else, but make a goal every day to have at least one quiet, attention-paying moment with your kids.

I don’t think kids need stuff to be happy, in fact, I think too much stuff just complicates things. What they really want is the same as what we all want, they want to feel valued, and the best way to value them is to focus 100% of your energy on them when you are talking with them.

Modify the meal without cooking a new one: My son is 2, and he doesn’t like his food to touch. So when I cook something like a casserole or pasta dish, I pull separate parts out for him before I throw the meal together. For example, last night we made pork tacos with pineapple salsa, so before I made the salsa I put some fresh pineapple and kiwi on a plate for him, then added sliced pork loin and a tortilla. When I make chicken and dumplings he gets some sliced chicken before it goes into the broth, and fresh carrots and celery because he doesn’t like them cooked. This way, he is still trying different foods, but I am meeting him halfway.

Keep the healthy foods they like on hand: If the kids love cucumber slices, carrot sticks or fresh fruit, include it on the plate, along with whatever you cooked. If you are trying to get them to eat something new, put it on the plate, but don’t force it. Let them see you eat the broccoli, but don’t force them to eat it if they really hate it. If you fight over food, especially with a toddler, you won’t win. For older kids, try the “no thank you bite.” They only have to eat one, but sometimes that one bite turns into a few more.

Let them help you cook: The smallest child can help- my son paints pasta sauce onto lasagna noodles with a pastry brush, and sprinkles cheese on enchiladas, and he is brags that he cooked the meal. When he helps cook it, he usually eats at least part of it. Check out The Learning Tower – it gets kids up to your level at the kitchen counter safely.

Sit together: Do you like eating alone? Kids don’t either.

Above all, don’t give up. Don’t only serve macaroni & cheese and chicken nuggets, just because you think that’s all your children will eat. If you put a variety of foods in front of them, they’ll surprise you, they will eat!

We have USDA Organic foods which must meet strict guidelines to be eligible for the USDA organic label. They can not use chemicals for pesticides. They can’t use hormones and antibiotics when raising animals for food. Alternatively, organic farmers use natural methods to control pests such as purchasing predatory insects that will eat the pests. They also raise their animals in a natural, free-range environment and use organically grown foods to feed their animals.

Organic is the best and healthiest choice we can make when feeding our families but it isn’t always fresh. It too must be trucked in from miles away.

Locally grown foods, however, offer a variety of foods that are in season and fresh. If you have ever had a vegetable garden, you know that the freshest picked fruits and vegetables will taste the best. Buying local foods also helps your local farmers and reduces environmental costs from shipping food across the country. However, even if locally grown it doesn’t necessarily mean it was grown organically.

This still begs the question which is better? Well, that is a matter of opinion. Personally, I choose organic first, local second and hopefully, I won’t need to purchase any foods that have been traditionally grown. If you have ever compared a traditionally grown apple, for example, to an organically grown apple, you will see just how distorted our food supply really is from over farming and pesticides. An organic apple will be smaller, maybe a less perfect shape but it will taste fantastic.

Here are some quick ways to prepare for your next visitors so you can be sure they will enjoy their stay, and you will remain stress-free.

• Stock up on travel-size shampoos, lotions, etc., at your local discount store. Put together a small welcome kit with all the necessities. Your company will thank you for it, especially if they forgot something.
• If you don’t have a spare bedroom, inflatable mattresses are the perfect solution. If sleeping on vinyl doesn’t sound inviting, consider a feather bed like the Pacific Coast CuddleSoft Feather Bed, $109 – it can be rolled up and stored in a closet until it is needed. A feather bed can make the couch or even the floor much more comfortable and cozy.
• Closet space an issue? A clothes butler can solve this problem for about $30. Guests can hang their clothing items up instead of draping them over the bed or a chair. The butler folds up easily for storage, and can also double as hanging space for damp clothes, or as a coat wrack when you have a party.
• Laundering all linens and towels as soon as possible after your guests leave will insure that you will be ready for the next visitors.

A little planning ahead will make having guests a no stress situation for you and your company – even those unexpected visitors!

1. Recycle paper, bottles, and cans
2. Use CFL bulbs
3. Turn off all lights, electronics, computers, printers, when not in use.
4. If you’re in the market for a new computer, buy an Energy Star laptop. They use 90% less energy
5. Ditch the bottled water habit. It’s all just tap water anyway.
6. Only use recycled paper products
7. Try paperless alternatives when ever possible
   • google docs: Word and Spreadsheet
   • Remember The Milk: Online to-do list, compatible with gmail
   • Pay Pal
   • sign up for online bill pay through your bank
   • send an email instead of mail
8. Use recycled office products like rebinder which are 100% recycled products
9. When printing something print on both sides of the paper
10. Recycle ink/toner cartridges
11. Use recycled business cards

Have I missed any? Add them in a comment.

Tacos
Fried shells bad, ground beef, bad. Substitute ground turkey or soy crumble, but still use taco seasoning. Use a big piece of romaine or butter lettuce as a shell, and load up on tomato and avocado, add sautéed bell pepper and onion, top with a little bit of real cheese, and low fat or non fat sour cream. Make taco salad with your leftovers, but skip the fried tortilla bowl. Just put it in a non-edible bowl. By the time you get to the bowl, it’s just mindless eating anyway, right?

Pizza
If you make it yourself, it’s not evil. Make your own dough using whole wheat flour and roll the crust thin. A little bit of the real cheese goes a long way, so load up on sauce and veggies and then top with the good stuff. Don’t eat weird meat. That rules out pepperoni and sausage. Try barbecue chicken pizza, but don’t load up on the sauce too much! If you don’t have time or inclination to make your own dough, make French bread pizza.

Burgers
Use ground turkey, mix with a Lipton onion soup mix, one egg or eggbeater serving, breadcrumbs and spices. Grill and top with a tiny bit of the good cheese, then serve topped with lettuce, tomato, red onion and spicy mustard. Love mayo? Add a thin layer of the real deal. Try making sliders- little burgers served on dinner rolls. You feel like you get more food, but don’t eat more than you should.

Miss your French fries? Try this: cut sweet potatoes in strips, toss with olive oil, brown sugar, honey and cinnamon, and bake in a 350 oven until tender.

Other tips:

1. Use lemon juice, garlic and spices, instead of sauces, to flavor foods.
2. Eat off of small salad plates (I know you’ve heard it before, but it really works).
3. If you are making cream sauces, use skim milk instead of whole milk or cream.

Replace, replace, minimize.
For example, one of my favorite meals is ravioli with alfredo sauce, which is delicious but not very healthy. So what we do in our house is make a little bit and serve it as a side with grilled chicken, so that we still get the taste of the oh-so-good-but-so-bad-for-you ravioli without having a big bowl.

I know these days you really can “not cook” and be fine, but as a person who cooks most of the meals for my family, it’s hard for me to fathom. My reasons for cooking at home have always been budget and health. I hate to spend so much money in restaurants and a lot of restaurant food is just a gut bomb that causes you to crash out after an hour.

Everyone can cook

The truth is, if you can read a recipe, you can cook. So where do you find recipes? You don’t have to buy cookbooks. Watch the Food Network, and if a recipe interests you go print it at their site Food Network. Other sites that offer great healthy recipes: Cooking Light and Epicurious. Or just Google “recipes” and you will find more than you could possibly need. Or ask someone who already cooks at home. People love to share their recipes.

There are a few things you should do if you want to cook at home:

1. Make a plan.
   A weekly menu isn’t necessary unless a well planned out menu is something that will help you. But you do need to know what you’re going to cook every day. Before you go to work, you need to know what you’re cooking for dinner or else you might choose a different route and pick something up on your way home.
2. You have to grocery shop. With a list.
   I know, grocery shopping can be a chore sometimes, so we just run in and grab a few items. But this gets expensive. You end up with impulse buys, and you waste a lot of time wondering around thinking of what to get.

So, this is what you do: Pick 5 or 6 recipes, make a list, and spend an hour at the store once a week. Then, don’t step foot in the store until the next weekend.

3. Make sure to cook extra servings.
   If you want to be able to bring your leftovers to work, you need to cook a little extra so you have something to take for lunch. A rule of thumb I use is to double the recipe. If it’s just you cook 2 chicken breasts instead of one and take the other to lunch. As the recipes get larger like spaghetti for example, or your cooking for a family use your best judgment. Remember 1 serving is about the size of your fist or ruffly 1 cup.
4. Prep on your day off.
   If you get in a prep mode on your weekends, it won’t take long during the week to put a healthy meal together. Take a hint from chefs, who spend just as much time prepping as they do cooking. When the doors open for the dinner rush, their veggies are chopped, pasta cooked, meat is ready to go.

With a little bit of planning you will end up saving a lot money and calories, and more importantly, you can stop worrying about what to eat and think about more important things, like how to force yourself to get to the gym in morning (let me know when you figure that one out, I’m still trying).

Have a home for all of your stuff.

This is essential. There is no way you can avoid clutter if you don’t have a designated space for everything. Look around and take inventory of your clutter. Then designate homes for everything that is lying around and put it all away.

The biggest clutter culprit; The paper trail:

Where does incoming mail land in your home? Even if you are not a highly organized person, you have to create a system for mail and the paper trail of life.

Banish the paper trail once and for all:

• 1.Create files for everything. If you have a file cabinet, use it. I have files for everyone in the family (yes, even the 2 year old). If a piece of paper constantly clutters you, make a file. If you don’t have a file cabinet, expandable files, binders, even small boxes with lids work great for your paper.
• 2.Cancel all subscriptions of magazines and newspapers that pile up unread. Maybe get the paper only on weekends, when you actually have time to read it.
• 3.Go to the source. Opt out of junk mail and catalogs at OptOut.com

Next up; all the other stuff of life that seems to crowd us out of our home and leave us feeling cramped. These are things like toys, books, clothes, shoes and nick knacks.

Group like things together.

For example, all office supplies go in our mail center, a place designated for all mail. This makes sense to us and our family because it seems a logical place to store stamps, envelopes, pens, paper and so on. Everything needed to send a letter or a bill is all in the same place.

All different groups go in its individual basket; musical instruments in one basket, toys in another. Books are all grouped on the book shelf.

Grouping helps with clean up, and I think our son likes knowing where his stuff is. Except, for his happy meal toys, they get thrown out in the middle of the night (shhh, don’t tell).

If you have little ones in the house, this grouping system works well because it’s simple, making it easy for them to help out with clean up.

Purge, purge, purge:

Keep a box in the garage, top shelf of your closet, laundry room, wherever, and throw stuff in. If it clutters your mind, throw it in the box. If you are constantly bringing things in, you must constantly get stuff out.

Then schedule a time, maybe once a month, to go through the purge box and let it all go. Whether you donate it or it needs to go in the trash, your purge box needs to be cleared out or it will just become another hub of clutter. Remember you want to remove the clutter not just move it around your home.

Think before you buy; ask do I really need this item?

If you do make a purchase, then use the ”in/out rule”: think of your purchases as replacements, not additions, meaning if you buy a shirt, you must get rid of a shirt. If you buy a book, you must get rid of a book. Donation is a great way of letting go of your stuff and it allows others to use, love, and enjoy the things you no longer want or need.

Perfection isn’t your goal. Your home probably won’t look like the ones in Architectural Digest and why would it. Those homes don’t look lived in, ever. (I do have a theory though, that people who’s houses look like that have a huge bin of junk somewhere, and I want to find it.)

With a little work, your home can be clutter free. You’ll be amazed how much better you’ll sleep at night, knowing you can find what you need and not feel overloaded with stuff.