Our family isn’t normal. And I say that as a compliment to all five of us. We just don’t do things like everyone else. Take playing 4-square for example. It’s an honor to wear the volleyball shell on our heads… that means we are in the “king’s square”. And the game gets very competitive once there is a “trophy” to win, even if that trophy is a worn out nasty shell of a volleyball. We don’t care.

Sugar Daddy came up with the “prize” for this 4-square game. That simple hilarious gesture is one of the thousand reasons I adore him. He is just different. I can’t ever explain him to other people; what it is about him as a man, husband, father, and friend. But in his case, different is very good. Sometimes he says things that might be inappropriate to other parents, but it’s how our family rolls. It’s how we talk to each other. It’s how we function in this crazy ass world.

I’m not normal either. He has never said it, but I think my quirkiness is what attracted him to me. I wasn’t like the other girls, and I’m still not. Most of the time I’m the weirdo that seems out of place no matter where I stand. But we fit. His randomness + my quirkiness = a strange family that makes it work for US. At the end of the day that is important… to make sure we parent how WE want to parent our kids. Not how the books said. Not how our parents always did it. And certainly not how all of our friends and neighbors do it.

So sometimes we get an eyebrow raised at us. Or people keep their distance. And maybe even comments are made. But we really don’t care. Our kids are good kids… sometimes they are strange. Sometimes they say things that might seem inappropriate to others. And maybe they have a sense of style that seems a tad “off”.  But I would feel like I failed them if I let that affect my parenting style.

We played 4-square in our driveway this weekend and each of us took a turn wearing the “prize” on our heads. People drove by and walked past and it never occurred to me what we might look like to them. I don’t think it occurred to the rest of my family either because we were having a great time. And dang it if I wasn’t extremely competitive in wanting that thing on my head! When I finally reached the king’s square I couldn’t quit dancing… in fact, I might have rubbed it in their faces just a little bit. Ha!

Be the parent you understand even if other people don’t. If a rule or tradition doesn’t make sense to you, than don’t do it. You are creating your own family and your own memories. It should reflect you and your spouse. My kids will look back at the pictures from this day and “get” it. What else matters?

And how is it possible that he is still attractive with that on his head? Sheesh!

Here are the rules:
Post the rules
Answer 11 (or 9) questions the tagger posted for you
Create 11(or 9) new questions to ask the people you tag
Tag 11 (or 9) people
Let them know you’ve tagged them

Now for the 11 Kate asked of me:
1. What is your favorite breakfast food?

Homemade biscuits with sausage gravy… but I’m super picky about the gravy. So it needs to be good, without the huge chunks of cheap fatty sausage.  I also love homemade waffles topped with fresh strawberries and REAL whipped cream. With the waffles a mimosa would be perfect.

2. Who is someone (besides a parent) who has had a large, positive impact on you?

My Grandma. But I’ve written about her already. So I’ll say my aunt & uncle in Oklahoma. They are incredibly patient and giving people. They are talented & do well for themselves, but humble. They are thrifty and don’t need to be. Every year, at least once, they travel to Mexico to build homes for those less fortunate. It’s become a passion of theirs and something they devote their time to in retirement. Also, they live in the country and have a wraparound front porch with a swing. I spent many a summer sitting on that swing. And you know how I feel about front porch swings, right?

3. What is one of your favorite books?

Oh Heavens! That’s like asking me my favorite thing to eat. I’d have to say that The Secret Garden was a favorite of mine as a child and I’m currently re-reading it in its original format. So far, I still enjoy it as much as when I was a kid. Anne of Green Gables is also one I read a second time, and very rarely do I re-read a book. There are just too many on my list!
4. If you had 24 hours free to do ANYTHING, what would you choose to do?

If money were not an issue I would organize a ton of crafting projects, fix a big pot of strong coffee, rent a few movies from Red Box and craft the entire day… non-stop.

5. Are you a cat or dog person and why do you feel that way?

Dog. No doubt. I like that they are more affectionate, and seem to be more into people than dogs. You can be active with a dog and enjoy their company more. But my personality is more like a cat. Ha!

6. Where is a place you haven’t visited but would love to?

Portland! I was supposed to go a few years back by myself, but out of “mom guilt” cancelled the whole thing. I know I’d love the place… I think it’s totally my vibe. Small shops filled to the brim with unique items, bookstores on every corner, eclectic coffee shops, overcast weather, and hiking trails; sounds pretty much perfect to me.

7. What is a “must visit” blog for you? What about it speaks to you?

Honestly, there isn’t one blog that I visit every single day. But I have to say that Meg, from Whatever seems relatable. Because I also have older children, had a child when I was young, married my high school sweetheart, and love crafting, I feel a connection with her. Also, she is very honest about where she is in her faith journey, and I feel like I’m in a similar place. Now that she has the house in the country I love it even more at her blog! I live vicariously through her new country life.

8. What is one of your favorite memories?

The moment I first saw my husband is the first that comes to my mind. When I think about it I can remember exactly how I felt… how warm the air was, how my heart jumped, my palms got sweaty, and he just looked so hot! I’ve gone into that before, but it’s worth repeating. As goofy as it sounds it was a magical moment. Also, hanging out with my mom and daughter for a girl’s week at a cabin in the mountains of Colorado is at the top of my list. It was a fantastic week filled with laughter, conversation, shopping, good food, quiet time, and hiking.

9. What is a thing you really like about yourself?

It’s not always a good thing, but I’m passionate. I really care about people’s feelings, my work, my family, and doing the right thing in this life. But sometimes it can all get overwhelming since I’m also an emotional person.

10. Do you like your handwriting?

Used to love it. In fact, it was something that friends from grade school remembered about me. Not so much now that type more often than write. But I’m working on that.

11. If you could pick one thing to be exemplary at, what would it be?

Dance—specifically the lyrical style. Sounds strange but I’ve always envied incredible dancers; the way they move their bodies is so emotional and beautiful. Second to that would be photography. I probably should have said “mothering”… oops.

My 9 questions:

1. If you could help run one charity which would you choose and why?

2. What is the one thing that gives you most comfort?

3. What is your go-to cosmetic/beauty product?

4. You have the power to change one specific thing about our country’s history, what would you choose to change?

5. What is your best gift/talent?

6. Describe your perfect date night.

7. What is one of your favorite family traditions?

8. Your favorite scripture, poem, or quote and why?

9. What is the nicest thing someone has ever done for you?

Tag! These women are it!

Janene @ http://everydayeo.blogspot.com/

Kimberly @ http://www.makemommygosomethingsomething.com/

Mel @ http://thelarsonlingo.blogspot.com/

Heather @ http://wearetheholdens.blogspot.com/

Jami @ http://www.callmeblessed.com/

Denise @ http://victoryrd.blogspot.com/

Jennifer @ http://www.cupcakesandmudpuddles.com/

Kristen @ http://kristencheney.blogspot.com/

Ashley @ http://www.crayonsandcaffeineblog.com/

(Copied this idea from Annie at Turning Pages)

Listening . . . to “Wish You Well” by Kate Herzig. I’ve cried every time I listen to it, but it’s a happy cry… the song is beautiful and everything I am feeling right now.

Watching . . . Modern Family where I laugh until I practically pee my pants, The Big Bang Theory… watched my very first episode this past week and now I’m slightly obsessed with the geekdom, and world soccer… that’s kind of required watching if you live in our house.

Reading . . . Story of Beautiful Girl by Rachel Simon, my Bible study on Ephesians, and The Secret Garden (the original version)

Eating . . . a lot of quick chicken and pasta dishes. It’s soccer season for my boys which translates to busy nights. I’m doing good to get one fruit or vegetable in their bellies.

Drinking . . . water out of my Tervis like it’s my job, 4-5 cups of coffee before 10:00 am every day, and my new drink for adult time; Tanqueray, tonic, and lime with lots and lots of crushed ice.

Wearing . . . comfy cotton maxi dresses. I could care less if they are “on trend” or not… I’ve loved this style since I was in highschool. SO comfortable on my body and tons of styles to choose from. My favorite right now is from Athleta. And I wear them with my Converse because I don’t like my toes. Ha!

Feeling . . . still a little “off” since my Grandma’s passing, but also very positive about great things to come. Life is good. Hell, life is GREAT!

Wanting . . . to get stuff planted in our new landscaping area. But, dang, trees are expensive! Seriously??? Hoping I can find a good spot for some beautiful hostas and some sort of gorgeous ornamental tree.

Needing . . . a girl’s night. Or a night with Sugar Daddy. How about both!

Thinking . . . about the weather warming up and inviting people over for good food, drinks, and conversation. We’ve been here 7 years, I think it’s time to make friends. LOL!

Enjoying . . . the daycare kids’ naptime when I can get cross stitching, reading, and Bible study done. And the sunshine!

* Photos are from our time spent in Oklahoma celebrating my Grandmother and Aunt’s lives. The time together with family was perfect. I have no other words to describe it. We played baseball at my mom’s horse ranch; time with mini donkeys was great for the soul. They are such sweet little creatures. Staying at my aunt and uncle’s house was great fun- the kids had room to run… room to be kids.

The family photo of the 5 of us was taken right before my Grandma’s service- a bittersweet morning. It was Good Friday, and I was about to say good-bye to an incredible woman.

The last photo was taken during a game of baseball… I just love this picture of my mother with my husband. She’s always smiling; she is a sweet gift in our family. She’s a rock of support and encouragement. And those two are always cutting up with each other– I’m thankful to have a husband that loves my mother and vice versa.

I feel her pain; Girl is the youngest with two older brothers. She feels outnumbered and ganged up on… I get it. But she holds her own and she’ll be better for it. Her brothers will be better men for it too; for loving their sister and for being patient with her when she isn’t so agreeable. I tattled on my brothers and threw temper tantrums like the best of them. But my youngest brother is my best friend today.

Teen and Sugar Daddy are always at it — now standing the same height the competition is fierce. Teen is still trying to figure out his placement under our roof; not quite an adult and no longer “juvenile” like his brother and sister. Right now his biggest challenge is just knowing when to keep his mouth shut. His siblings are learning that tough lesson by watching him. He loves his younger siblings, it’s just shown in his own way.

Tween (no longer a tween) battles his sister the most. He challenges her every. single. move. But he also supports her. She has decided to try soccer this next fall and he is encouraging her 100%; helping her pick the best cleats, showing her the best way to take shots, and even helping with her possible goalie skills. She just wants whatever her brother have or recommend. I think it’s why she wants to play the game… she knows they will help her.

Teen & Tween like to hang out and do guy stuff, but they also antagonize each other constantly. Teen likes to claim he is smarter while Tween says he is more athletic and “the ladies” like him more. They are both wrong, because they are both smart, athletic, and cute guys.

I feel like my kids all look up to each other. As their mom I want them to remain close through life… and to do that I step back. I let them sort it out, require each others help and not my own, and let them laugh together… just the three of them. They don’t always need me and their Dad stepping in. Figuring it out together now will teach them how to figure it out together later.

These kids of mine… they will be just fine in this world. And together, they will be even better.

While preparing for her service I had the pleasure of helping my mother and her two sisters sort through her mementos. My Grandma had photos going all the way back to her single days in the 40′s and photos from when she first met my Grandpa. And as a lover of photography I was in heaven sorting through the photos, staring at every small detail, and seeing a side of her that I had never seen before as a grandchild.

There were also letters. Letters from her sisters and friends. Letters from her children. And a collection of all the poems she had written were also included.

The memories went on and on. It was awesome to have so much to treasure from her life… and I wondered, what will we have? Will we have to print off Facebook status updates? Or Twitter feeds? Will we regret that all of our communication was lost through text messaging or quick photos that were never kept and documented? An older person attending her funeral brought up the same thing to me… will my generation have the same stack of memories to share when we reach the end of our life? Because it IS important for the people in our family to remember us, to know more about us, and to hold on to a piece of our past. I was able to keep my Grandmother’s hand written recipes, and as I wrote before, I also have a few of my Grandpa’s journals. They are special to me, and I’m not one to usually hold on to stuff. But these will be treasured.

Every month I sat down to write my Grandma a letter and print off photos of the kids to mail to her. That void will now be filled by writing friends and other family members… because I believe in the power of a pen (or pencil).

Write a letter. Send a card. Jot down a note on the back of the photo if scrapbooking isn’t your thing (it’s not mine). I have a box that sits next to my bed that holds special cards and letters from family & friends. In that box are some letters from my Grandma… I’m so happy I kept them.

To get started, here are some fun papers to use in your letter writing:

There are a few versions on the internet that don’t use boxed cake mix… and by all means if you’re a purist make those versions instead. I usually prefer 100% from scratch as well, but this is perfectly tasty as is.

Strawberry Sheet Cake

1 box white cake mix

4 eggs, well beaten

2/3 cup oil

3 T all purpose flour

1- 3 oz strawberry jello

1/2 cup hot water

1 cup unsweetened frozen sliced strawberries

1 cup fresh sliced strawberries

3-5 T sugar (really depends on your own preference)

1 stick unsalted butter; melted

1 box powdered sugar (more or less, again depending on your preference)

Combine the thawed and fresh strawberries with the sugar. Chop and mix; let set for a bit. This breaks down the strawberries & softens them. Add the hot water to the jello, mix until dissolved. In mixing bowl combine cake mix, beaten eggs, oil, flour, jello, and 1 cup of the strawberries. Mix until JUST combined.

Pour into a lightly greased sheet pan.

Bake at 325 for 25 minutes; or until toothpick comes out clean. Do not over bake.

Carefully pour powdered sugar in mixing bowl. Beat in the melted butter and then the strawberries. This should be a pourable consistency. And very yummy!

Once the cake is out of the oven let it set for just a few minutes.

Then slowly pour the frosting over the top… being careful not to let it pour over the sides. And being careful not to pour it straight into your mouth.

At this point I would have cut a piece out and taken a picture, but since I was taking to a party I had to leave intact.

It can be a very pretty cake though.

]]> http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/04/18/strawberry-sheet-cake/feed/ 1 http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/04/18/strawberry-sheet-cake/ http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/DailyDoseOfSugarMama/~3/eoWaU2zV9sU/ http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/04/12/busy/#comments Thu, 12 Apr 2012 15:36:06 +0000 SugarMama http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/?p=2875 Between my job, the kids’ activities, and recent family events it has stayed steadily busy in these parts. Here are a few things I have done recently that I recommend.

Made these but added applesauce in place of butter and whole wheat flour in place of white and I also added chopped dried apples. They make the perfect after school snack, between soccer games snack, or for breakfast:

We have eaten these for dinner twice in the last month, my kids love them that much! In my boredom I’ve been searching for new fast & delicious recipes.

So far I’ve made two of these for Girl. She loves them! They are perfect with leggings or a pair of knit shorts underneath. I picked some fun fabrics so she can mix and match as she pleases.

And I made these to coordinate with the skirts:

After finding the perfect red & black argyle fabric I made four of these for my daycare boys:

I’ve printed this off to work on someday very soon! I need it hanging on my wall:

Source: hancockshouseofhappy.blogspot.com via Sugar_Mama on Pinterest

And I’ve been completely obsessed with this verse. Reading it over and over… soaking it in. I just ordered a ring with the verse inscribed on it, I love it that much.

Source: ragamuffinbeauties.blogspot.com via Jenni on Pinterest

]]> http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/04/12/busy/feed/ 7 http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/04/12/busy/ http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/DailyDoseOfSugarMama/~3/0ZSoAJU4JwQ/ http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/03/12/her-front-porch/#comments Mon, 12 Mar 2012 12:43:56 +0000 SugarMama http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/?p=2380 I originally wrote this story for The Good Woman Project, but am sharing it again on my blog for this post about front porch swings. My Grandmother sits on hers every single day while watching the cars drive by. Most times, when one glances over at her from their vehicle, they will see that she is smiling. They will not know of her constant pain.

Her disfigured and swollen hand reached over to rest on my leg as we sat side by side on the front porch swing. We both watched as the traffic slowly drove by her small white house with its flower-filled window boxes and large oak tree. She couldn’t see the detail of the cars like I could. She could only vaguely see the color of the flowers, no longer knowing their type.  The swing creaked with each gradual swing, and we sat without saying a word.

But her hands spoke to me.

They are gnarled and ugly to most that see them. Their arthritic deformities keep her from doing the things she had done for years before: no more late nights knitting in her overstuffed chair, no more canning beets from her garden, and no more writing in the cursive that was so familiar to me.

Those swollen fingers were usually black and blue these days. Her fingernails still long, as they’d always been. Her skin still smooth and soft. But the fingers had grown increasingly misshapen.

And beautiful.

As I grew up, I was never disgusted by her hands. I watched them fix my favorite buttered toast or turn the page of the book I requested she read over and over again. Her fingers reminded me of the roots of a big strong tree, reaching to soak up all of the goodness. I didn’t realize as a little girl how much pain she suffered. Without complaint, she continued buttering my bread and turning pages.

Her feet were no better off. But she never hid them. She never complained of the pain of the arthritis. Her selfless ways have led others to Christ in a way I feel I never could. Her calm mild manner reached out, like the roots of that big oak tree, and touched the lives of everyone that crossed her path. No ugliness in her soul.

Never making comment of outside beauty that I can remember, instead spoke of people’s hearts, teaching me that it’s what people do that makes them beautiful. She would have loved me no matter what I looked like, but she would have been disappointed in me if my focus had been on my outward beauty. I learned from her that the body is just the body. Her body has become almost useless as the arthritis has overtaken every joint. However, her mind is the same mind, her heart the same heart.

My Grandmother is one of the most beautiful women I have known in my life. The deformed hands and feet are a part of that beauty. What she chooses to DO with the pain of the crippling disease is part of what makes her beautiful. No one knows the amount of daily pain she endures, but we know it would make most people insufferable. She has kind eyes and wisdom in her soul. She passes no judgment, for she knows that is not her place. She listens intently, never making anyone feel insignificant. I can only hope to have a fraction of her beauty as a woman.

When she is gone from this earth the old oak tree will cry along with the many people that love her. But her beauty will be passed on, hopefully, by women like me that listened to her. So I continue to sit on the swing and slightly rock back and forth with my Grandma — if only in my mind — and I cling to the beautifully disfigured hands.

 This summer I was able to get this picture with Girl, me, and My Grandma. Just so happens it was on her front porch swing… awesome! My Grandmother looks so tiny here, but at one time she was 5′ 8″.

]]> http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/03/12/her-front-porch/feed/ 5 http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/03/12/her-front-porch/ http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/DailyDoseOfSugarMama/~3/ad8QQ0BDE98/ http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/02/29/2868/#comments Thu, 01 Mar 2012 03:23:06 +0000 SugarMama http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/?p=2868

Let your faith be BIGGER than your fear

 

That’s my favorite quote right now. It’s been on my mind for the last

several months. How are you? Is there something that you fear?

Something that is holding you back?  If you need to vent… tell me about it.

And if you’ve moved past the fear, tell me about that too.

]]> http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/02/29/2868/feed/ 0 http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/02/29/2868/ http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/DailyDoseOfSugarMama/~3/7CwhInmxX7U/ http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/2012/01/29/a-new-phase/#comments Sun, 29 Jan 2012 23:16:09 +0000 SugarMama http://www.dailydoseofsugarmama.com/?p=2858 I love my blog.

But I used to love other things more- like playing board games with my kids and going on walks.

And where most bloggers can balance it all, I can’t. Not right now. It’s not that my blog is so crazy popular that I’m spending hours cranking out e-mails and material. It’s just, I spend a lot of time thinking about what to post next.

Honesty is my policy, so with that I’m telling you that this blog has made me a lazy mother and wife lately. It wasn’t always that way, and maybe I can figure out the balance. Or maybe, taking a break… a really long one… can inspire me some way.

Until I can figure it out I won’t be on my blog. My mind is racing with ideas to pursue in my life- I want to be an advocate for our young girls, perfect my cupcake baking, learn more about photography, and most of all, I want to be PRESENT in the life of my kids and husband.

I will be around. Some of my favorite people in the world are my blogging peeps!

Source: fabulouskblog.com via Sugar_Mama on Pinterest

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