Darci Cole

Nine Years and Counting

2020-04-02T09:00:00.000-07:00

Nine years ago, I had the realization that I, despite previously believing otherwise, had the capacity to write a book. A novel, a fantasy story that would span tens of thousands of words. On April 2nd, 2011, I wrote the first lines and pages of what would become my first completed novel. (I just went and reread those first lines and it made me so happy.) That story is trunked, but I have fond memories of some of the elements from it. I hope to some day resurrect those elements in other stories. Since that day, I’ve drafted six novels, revised and queried two, and started multiple others that paused or broke off at various wordcounts.

Back then when I was learning about writing and publishing, I learned an important lesson: most writers don’t see publication in their first ten years of writing. So, I decided I would give myself ten years. Ten years to learn, ten years to be bad at this, ten years to improve, and--hopefully--ten years to get published. But if there's one thing I've learned about myself in the past nine years, it's how much creating stories is a part of me. Of course I'd love to someday announce that I have an agent and I'm getting published and all my dreams are coming true, but even if that day never comes, I will keep writing.

Which is surprising to me, in a way. I got into this gig not only because it was a great way to spend my time as a new stay-at-home-mom, not only because it gave me a way to express my creativity that didn't require me to leave the house, but also because I did want to be published. I remember drawing a picture of a trilogy on a shelf, with a cover to match the book I was working on, as motivation to keep writing. Honestly, maybe I should do that again lol. And beyond that, I wanted to earn money doing this.

I see authors with 30+ books released and more on the way, who have readers and change lives and it just makes me want it more. And the one piece of advice I've heard more than any other over the years is that you only fail if you stop.

Now, I've thought about this too: I've had to take significant breaks from writing in the past nine years. There were three years in there where I didn't produce any new work, and coming back after that has been really difficult. I finished a draft, but it wasn't good. I'm working on something else because I wanted to get away from that project. Though I didn't want to say it out loud at the time, I considered that a failure.

That writing break happened in 2016-2018. It's now 2020 and I'm honestly not sure what I have to show for the last couple of years. A bunch of query rejections and a really *really* bad first draft? I feel like I'm back in year four or five of my "ten years" I gave myself, and if that's the case, maybe I need to extend my "finish line" so to speak.

This way of thinking has always kept me motivated. It was like it gave me a light at the end of a very dark tunnel, and now that I'm coming up on the timeline end I'm not sure how to feel or what to think. My apologies for the ramblings, but it's how I'm feeling, and this is my blog so I do what I want ;) I love my stories, though. That's one thing I know for certain. And I know that I am willing to put in the work required to get to where I want to be. Whether it takes one more year or five, or twenty, I will keep pushing, keep learning, and keep writing.

All that said, I'd like to start treating this day as a kind of check-in point for me. A review of the past year and a list of what's to come. I don't know what to call this, but I'm sure I'll think of something eventually.

So 2019 was a real whirlwind for me and my family, and in retrospect it makes a lot of sense why I didn't get anything new written that I was happy with. At the very end of 2018, we were given six weeks notice that we needed to be out of the apartment we'd lived in for six years. We were devastated, and I definitely could not write or focus during that time.

We finally moved and were lucky to find a home to buy, and I spent the next few months drafting a new project and revising an old one. I sent out some queries in May of that year for TARGET, which I'd queried in 2014. These were to agents who, to be honest, hadn't been agents back then. I got some requests and rejections as I'd kind of expected, and then sent out more queries in October for a different story--SUMMON. Same results, and I actually just got a rejection on a full request this past week, so that was rough.

All the while, I was playing with a half-draft of a new story, OF TOPAZ AND STARLIGHT. I ended up drafting it for NaNoWriMo, but this is the story that I feel is a fail. It's broken, and I'm not sure why. I need to take some diagnostic story tools to it and see if I can pinpoint what the major issues are and maybe fix them. It's entirely possible that this, like my first book, just needs to be trunked. But I love the characters and hope to use them in something someday. We'll see.

I took December off intentionally, and since January I've been slowly drafting a YA Fantasy monster-hunter story that I am absolutely in love with. For the first time, I'm getting feedback from alpha readers as I write, and it's making a significant difference in my process. I feel--I hope--I come out of this with a cleaner rough draft than I normally do.

Side note: this has always been a struggle for me, because my "Zero Draft" is always a huge mess, which makes revising VERY daunting. I would love it if I come out of this process with more confidence and hope than dread as I have in the past.

I'm also playing with the idea of self-publishing some adult stuff under a pen name, but if I do I won't be talking about that much here, except to say that it's taking up writing time. We'll see how that goes.

And then, of course, covid-19 happened, and my kids are schooling from home for the rest of the year, which takes up all of my daytime "get stuff done" time and a significant amount of mental and emotional energy. As with everyone else, I don't know what the coming months hold. All I can do is take things one day at a time and hope for the best.

In the meantime, stay home, wash your hands, and be awesome.

Thanks for reading, guys <3

-DC

Making Time

2019-08-29T20:11:00.001-07:00

I think I’m stuck in a rut.

The past few weeks have been particularly trying for me. Because even though school is finally back in session and I actually have down time most days, I’ve had a lot going on.

School started on the 5th. The first week is always rough, and this time around our kids had trouble staying asleep all night that first week, so along with working until 1am some nights, I also wasn’t getting sleep between 1am and 7am.

Then on the 15th we got news that my Grandpa wasn’t doing well and had asked people to come visit him. I took my kids over that day, and it was hard to see my amazing grandfather so frail, but I’m glad I got to sit and hold his hand for a while. He passed away in his sleep on the night of the 18th, and from there it was all about getting babysitters for the viewing and the funeral and making sure I didn’t have tears streaming down my face when I delivered pizza to customers.

We had guests for dinner one night, and a concert my brother was in another, we had a school Skateland Party, classmate birthdays, parent-teacher meetings, and finally a day-long doctors appointment that was super necessary and I’m grateful we got through it, but also super stressful and a lot to take in.

Then my grandpa’s funeral was yesterday, (plus a lot of other stuff going on) and you’d think I would’ve been cried-our by this point, but NO. It was a long day, we had many places to be, and finally I was able to end the night with an awesome friend taking me to dinner and allowing me to just talk freely about so much and feel like a normal person for a couple hours.

I woke up today feeling sore all over. My body and brain are mush, and I do t even know if the crazy is over yet. All I know is I have a night of nothing scheduled, and I want to do nothing except sleep. Then I got a call tonight from my store saying I was scheduled to work. What? I called back because I know I had checked the schedule three times to make sure I knew when they needed me, and I was positive I had Thursday off. Well, apparently the schedule had been changed between the last time I looked at it (Monday, the last time I worked) and today. And no one told me. Yet they expected me to be there. I'll be honest, even if I hadn't had the week I've had, I would be upset. But given how emotional my life has been the last week, I cried on the phone and told the manager I couldn't come in tonight. Did I have plans? No. That was the idea. I need this night to recharge.

So, back to my opening statement.

I firmly believe that opportunities don’t come unless you’re moving forward. You’ve got to be on a path in order for things to come into said path, right? I’m not going to get an agent or sell any books unless I’m writing books. And every day I look at my lack of progress in my writing career and think, “Why isn’t anything happening?”

But I know why. It’s because I’m not “making time” to write. Because people who WANT to write will MAKE the time to do it, right?

I’ve really come to hate that saying.

Back when I had only two kids and no job and my anxiety was dormant and I was supported by my husband’s income, I was able to “make time” to write.

But now, I don’t have a choice but to fill my time with a bunch of things that aren’t writing.

I have four kids (it’s not a dozen, but it’s a lot). I work a job from home during the day *and* one outside the home at night to help support our family. My anxiety is manageable, but there are always bad days. Finances are stressful, even when they’re not debilitating. Family is stressful even when I love them with all my heart.

The fact is, my days and nights are filled with so much stuff that any down time I have is used either sleeping or just letting my brain rest from all the mental stress of organizing, list-making, double checking, and feeing frustrates that things still fall through the cracks.

There’s got to be a problem when you can drink 36oz of Dr Pepper before 11am and then sleep from 11-1.

I want to make time to write. But I have nothing blocking my creativity right now except Life Happenings, and unfortunately real life has to take priority over my imaginary ones. I still manage to find a few hours most weeks to write, but nothing as consistent or regular as I would like. And that’s frustrating to me.

I’m not writing this to ask for advice, really. I know the problem, and I’ve accepted that I can’t really fix it right now. It’ll take time. I need to look at my life and decide what I can keep and what I need to let go of. That’ll be hard, but I think it’s time for some solid self examination. Because I can’t continue to function with this level of activity and stress.

Thanks for listening ❤️
-DC

So Many Ideas, So Little Time

2019-04-11T11:20:00.000-07:00

Back in September of 2012, when I was still a newbie writer, I typed "The End" on my first ever first draft. I immediately sent it to a few friends who had volunteered to read it, and then sat back to wait and realized:

I had no idea what to write next.

The problem hadn't occurred to me until that point. I knew, from being online and seeing more seasoned writers talk about it, that the next step after finishing something was to start the next thing. But I didn't have any other ideas. I thought maybe that was the one book in me, and I'd never write another story ever again. Maybe I would be happy to just self publish this one and see it in print and that would be my life's lone work of art.

Then a few weeks later, I was lying in bed in our tiny apartment, my husband sleeping beside me, and the baby in his crib, and I thought...what if Robin Hood were a teenage girl? What would make a young woman so hardened that she would be respected by a group of outlaws enough to be their leader?

And so, my next story was born.

Over the years I've heard many authors talk about idea generation. Keeping lists, notebooks, word docs, or what have you, writing down any tiny spark of a story idea just in case it has potential to grow into an inferno. Because that's how it works. A story doesn't just happen--at least not for me. Once I find that spark, I have to feed it. I have to be patient, and I have to nurture it until it gets big enough to be a fully grown story.

Some story seeds grow fast. That Robin Hood idea did for me. I wrote and revised it in 2012/2013, and queried slowly throughout 2014 and 2015 (while I wrote the next project). During that time I got another idea for a book that I didn't attempt to write until NaNoWriMo of 2015. I knew I would need to be a better writer to do it justice, and even then, after more than three years of waiting, the story wasn't ready. I drafted it, and it had holes the size of a house all through it. That story needed more time to simmer.

Speaking of simmering, Victoria Schwab often talks about how she always has multiple story ideas on the "stove" of her brain. Some, she's actively "cooking" by outlining, world-building, or actually writing. But most, she has on a low heat, letting them simmer, letting the ingredients--the story spark, the characters, the plot twists--slowly come together in her head, until they're connected enough that she can actually draft the story.

I love this analogy, because it emphasizes the idea that not all stories come together like Hamburger Helper. Some take time and patience. Nothing against Hamburger Helper, of course. I grew up on that stuff. I'm just saying, some stories come together quickly and are delicious, and others take time and are delicious. There's a place for every story, no matter how long it takes to grow.

So for me, I now have a note on my iPhone Notes app that is pages and pages of tiny story sparks. Sometimes I'll go scroll through them and see if anything pops out at me, but more often than not these days, I already know what I want to work on before I've finished the last project. As of right now, I'm drafting one story, and I have the next one on a simmer, just waiting for a few little things to come together before I start it.

I'll close with this story. In February 2015, I met Brandon Sanderson at a signing. He's always gracious to fans and usually asks if you have a question for him. I asked something like, with the market fluctuating so much and tastes changing, how do you decide which ideas to follow? Which stories to write?

His answer was that for him, he has deadlines and obligations, so he kind of has to find a way to make himself write what he needs to. But if he's ever not feeling it, he'll take a few days to maybe play with an idea he's more excited about, to get him in the zone of being excited about writing. And he said that for me, I should focus on writing exactly that: what I'm most excited about. Because yes, the market is unpredictable and no one knows what's going to be big next week, let alone next year. So until I had deadlines, nurturing my love of writing was the most important thing.

I don't think he actually said all that, but that's what I got out of it :)

How do you organize your ideas? How do you decide what to write and when? How do you know when a story idea is ready to be moved from "simmer" to "high heat"?

Thanks for reading, guys <3

-DC

Testing Out My Focus Word

2019-02-06T15:51:00.000-07:00

January 2019 has been a whirlwind, guys.

Between December 28th and February 2nd, we went from settled and happy and planning the coming year, to having our roots ripped up and being forced to make a huge shift.

Our landlord gave us six weeks to move out of our apartment. I won’t go into his reasons, he was within his legal rights to do so. I have opinions about the situation but what matters is what happened.

Friends and family contributed to support us. Our cousins—who are real estate agents—got us approved to buy a home within a day. We found a home that fit our needs on January 11th, and our offer was approved on January 14th. We closed on the him January 31st, and we’re fully moved in (and out of our old house) on February 2nd, a whole week earlier than our deadline.

As I spend my days slowly unpacking and trying to wind down from the stress of the last five weeks, I find myself crying a lot, even though the uncertainty has passed. I feel gratitude and relief, I feel overwhelmed and loved.

And in the middle of all that, someone (I still don't know who) donated a full registration for me to attend Storymakers writing conference. I didn't ask for that, in fact I'd resigned myself to not going. But the generosity of the amazing people in my life continues to astound me.

All that said, it’s been months since I’ve written any new words, and the writerly part of my brain is screaming to be used.

The dilemma of wanting to write and not having enough mental space to do it is a real thing. There was a lot of waiting to do in the last month, a lot of sitting and staring at my phone as I waited for an email or a text message response to a question...but I was so stressed that I couldn’t bring myself to write during any of those times. Even when the house went quiet at the end of each day, I couldn’t hold a story in my head long enough to put down words. The stress was too much.

Now that we’re moved in and getting settled though, my creative brain is getting louder. Some people will say I shouldn’t push myself, and maybe they’re right. But I’m so anxious and eager to create. I’ve tried the last couple of days to draft something new, but I’m so out of the habit that it’s been difficult. I need to force myself to write words, any words, every day. Gotta start with something simple.

I saw someone the other day suggest writing a paragraph on why I want to write, or why I’m finding it difficult. I guess that’s partly why I wanted to write this blog post. These are my thoughts. It’s what’s been running through my head for a few days, and it’s also words I can count. It may not be story words, but it’s a place to start. Hopefully tomorrow, I can do more. Maybe I’ll try a writing prompt or a short story idea or something.

Here’s to stability, persistence, and writing a little bit as often as I can.

-DC

2018 Reflections, 2019 Resolutions

2018-12-31T13:20:00.001-07:00

Hey y'all. It's been a minute, hasn't it? Happy New Year!

As some of you may know if you've been following me for a while, instead of resolutions the last few years, I've chosen a single word to be my driving force.

2015: Believe

2016: Gratitude

2017: Wait

2018: Reach

A year ago, I set my 2018 Focus Word as REACH. It was good for me. I didn’t want to do too much or push myself too hard, but I did want to get out of the rut I felt I was stuck in.

Looking back, I can say with confidence that I accomplished that goal. In retrospect I maybe set my goals a little too high, I didn't do exactly everything I set out to do, but I did a lot more than I have in past years. So I’m taking the win.

Some of the things I did this year that I’m proud of:

-Had a baby! (Fourth time, but still an accomplishment!)

-Paid off a lot of debt (not all, but a lot)

-Participated in GISH!

-Set up my in-home recording studio

-Taught at a writing conference!

-Recorded and produced an audiobook!!!

-Recorded a second audiobook to be released in 2019

-Read 30 books

-Revised SUMMON. TWICE.

I’ve learned a lot about myself this year. I’ve learned that I constantly overestimate my ability to get work done quickly, so I need to make sure I give myself like twice the amount of time I think I need to do a project.

I’ve learned that I’m a much better mom, wife, and person in general when I stay off of Twitter and Facebook for the majority of my days.

I’ve learned that I enjoy reading to my kids every night.

I’ve learned that I sleep better and am less stressed when I exercise for at least 30 minutes a day.

I’ve learned that there are still a lot of areas of my life that I want to improve upon.

2018 was crazy, but it was also a lot of fun. When, in early December, I started thinking about 2019, I had tentatively chosen my focus word, but I wasn’t 100% happy with it. That’s probably because 2018 wasn’t done with us yet.

The first week of December, our car died. The repairs were going to cost more than it was worth to fix it, so we decided to take what we would’ve spent on repairs and buy a newer vehicle instead. So we got a new truck for Christmas! Exciting, right?

And then on Dec. 28th, just three days before the posting of this, we were given six weeks to be moved out of the apartment we’ve lived in for six and a half years.

I. Am. Terrified.

It's been three days and we're still kind of floundering. We're talking to our cousins (realtors) and trying to find a place that will fit our family and our budget. We're praying like crazy. And there are moments of absolute panic where it all hits and the only thing we can do is stop and cry. Then we pick ourselves up and move on. Because we really don't have any other choice.

I’ll be honest, friends, we are not in a great place for having to move. The deal we've had in this home was a huge blessing, and there's nothing else even close to the same. But, we had been talking about moving and trying to save for a down payment for a while, so we’re trying our best to look forward with optimism despite the (very real) fear we feel. We are incredibly blessed to have supportive family and friends close by, so all we can do now is move forward, and hope.

That being said, the last two days have made me reevaluate my hopes for 2019. My focus word is, “PERSIST.”

Despite setbacks and trials, fear and doubt, I am determined to persist. I refuse to back down from my hopes and dreams. I refuse to let fear rule my choices. I want to continue moving forward, taking risks, and pushing myself. And 2019 is a year for that.

I’m still scared, because not knowing what the future holds can do that to a person. But I have hope. Hope that everything will turn out okay. That this is not the end of the world. That maybe years from now, what feels like such a huge turning point will merely be a blip in the memories of our lives.

Let’s hope so. Here’s to 2019!

*throws confetti*

-DC

P.S. If you read this and want to help, my dear friend Julie has set up this fundraiser to help us pay off a little debt and free up some of our finances so we can afford a new place. If you can help, we are eternally grateful. If you can't, please consider sharing on social media so that maybe someone else can. Thank you <3

But What Do They WANT?

2018-04-25T05:00:00.000-07:00

Hey guys!

I’ve been thinking a lot about character motivation lately. This was brought on by a couple of books I was reading simultaneously, and realized that both of them had some things in common. First of all, they were books I LOVED, and the exact kind of stories I want to emulate in my work. Second, they were amazingly compelling and well paced. In trying to think about why I loved them so much, one of the things I realized was that each of the main characters had very tangible, easy to understand goals.

I’ve always heard “know what your characters want,” and “every character needs a goal,” but I'm starting to recognize that up until now all of my characters’ goals and desires have been kind of... vague. And this is making my characters weaker than they could be.

Not that an abstract desire *can’t* be done well, but I’ve found that in the books I really enjoy, a more concrete goal makes for stronger motivation.

All this reminded me of a picture I’ve seen on the @litrejections twitter account:

What does this mean for my characters? It means that they can't just have a nebulous dream without anything attached to it (which is what they currently have). They need a PLAN. They need to have steps in mind for achieving said dream, and they need to try to get it. They can fail, and should fail a few times. And maybe their plan changes, or the goal shifts, but their motivation and forward movement should always be there.

That's what makes a story great, for me. A character who knows what they want, and goes after it.

And lucky me, I just got notes back from my critique partner on SUMMON, and while she didn’t say these things exactly, the notes she did give showed me that this was a huge issue. So I’m hoping I can fix this, and give my characters much more active roles in their stories.

Example:

Vague:
Jane wants to find her true love.
Specific:
Jane has a crush on John and asks him to the dance, studying for weeks on how to effectively flirt so he'll fall madly in love with her.

Vague:
Joe wants to make a difference in the world.
Specific:
Joe runs for office in his city with a detailed plan to improve things.

Vague:
Sara wants to be a doctor.
Specific:
Sara studies her butt off to get into medical school.

Vague:
Hank wants revenge.
Specific:
Hank plans for years until he comes up with the perfect plan to kill the man who murdered his wife.

I hope that makes sense. I've been writing for seven years and I'm only now starting to really understand how well-build characters are formed. This is only one aspect, but I think a very important one.

Anyway. Not a super long post, but something that’s been on my mind. What are your thoughts on character desires and motivation? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

-DC

It's a Long Story

2018-03-19T13:07:00.000-07:00

First of all, HA! to Past!Darci for thinking I'd be able to blog often when I was pregnant. But luckily I was able to vlog fairly regularly, and for some reason that's easier for me than typing up a post? So that's a thing.

Second, heads up, this is gonna be a looooong post and quite personal. So if that's not your jam, consider yourself warned.

***

Friends, I'd like to tell you a story. This is a story of me, my dreams, my goals, my hopes and my fears. I'm probably gonna get emotional, and I hope you don't mind, because the journey I've been on for the last seven years feels like it's finally reached its climax, and I only have the denouement left to go before I jump into the sequel.

Let's start back in 2011. March, to be precise. That month, I wrote what would be the first line of the first novel I would ever finish. I'd been blogging for fun for a while, and realized people kinda sorta liked what I had to say, and I'd always loved books, so why not try my hand at writing one?

What followed was a few months of me writing a page or two a week, until that September when I said to myself, "if I don't finish this thing soon, I never will." So in the course of a month I wrote the last 20,000 words, and I had finished my first novel.

This is just one example of something writing would teach me about myself over the next five years: I have a "binge" personality. I'm a binger. I work most effectively when I can focus all my energy on one thing until I finish that thing. Whether it's drafting, revising, reading a novel, dishes, laundry, bathrooms, floors, making dinner... I do things best when I do them one at a time, usually in short, quick bursts.

So, in April 2016 we found out I was pregnant again. I'd had two miscarriages between that pregnancy and my last birth, so I was understandably nervous. That May I went to the Storymakers writing conference, and I had been ready to jump into querying again, but getting pregnant changed that. I realized that I wouldn't be able to fully focus on my writing career, my future in that arena, until I was totally done having kids.

Reminder: I'm a binger. I love my kids, and I want to be the best mom I can be for them. Having a baby requires an incredible amount of dedication of the physical, mental, and emotional variety. Before that pregnancy in 2016, my older boys were old enough that I could be a good mom and a focused writer. But adding more babies to the mix, I knew, would change the dynamic entirely. I needed my focus to be on my family for a time, and writing needed to be set aside.

This led me to thinking about my family, my future, and what I wanted for myself. I remember talking to Brandon during that pregnancy and asking him, with tears in my eyes, "Is it selfish of me to want to be done having kids so I can focus on my dreams?"

And, bless this wonderful man, he said, "Of course not."

So we talked about our family and how many kids we thought were waiting to join our family, (I won't go into detail on this but we're very spiritual people and believe our children were waiting to come to us) and we knew there was at least one more after the one I was carrying, possibly two. We decided then to just have those babies close together and get them all here as soon as possible, so we could get past the difficult times quickly, and be able to focus on raising these tiny humans.

And that is why, in July 2017, we announced another pregnancy. But there was a hitch: was this the last one, or not? I spent that pregnancy worrying about whether I was supposed to have another baby or not, and it was a cause of great stress for me. Brandon and I talked through it many times, but we could never quite come to a decision.

Baby Fuzz

It wasn't until Baby Fuzz was born at the beginning of this month that I knew: I was done. I needed to be done. My body and mind felt worn out, stretched thin. I told Brandon this, and he felt the same. As we were driving away from the hospital he jokingly said it felt like we had leveled-up somehow with this decision. Like a weight had been lifted, and we were entering a new stage of parenthood. Instead of adding children, we could now focus on raising them.

As this decision settles in, I find myself feeling many conflicting emotions. Relief, doubt, excitement, fear, anticipation, nerves. But overall is a sense of peace and hope, that now, soon, I will be able to focus on my writing again. And more specifically, my writing career.

So this post is meant to say a few things. That our family is finally complete, that I feel like my waiting stage is nearly over, and that when it comes to my writing career I hope I get to begin again soon. I know so many writers who can do both: be pregnant, have babies, and write and release books like it's their superpower, but that's not me. I'll spend this year focused on my babies, slowly getting back into my work, and before too long I'll be fully back in the game again.

Just to be clear: I love my family. I love my husband. I love my kids. I wouldn't be who I am without them. They love me, and they support me in all these decisions. And just because this was my journey, doesn't mean it'll be the same for others. I just hope that if there's another writer out there struggling the way I did, waiting, wondering, feeling down, that I can grant them a sliver of hope. It will all work out. Just keep dreaming, keep writing, keep moving forward. Your time will come.

Thanks for sticking around, guys <3
-DC

Light A Fire

2017-09-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

HEY BLOGGER!

Does anyone still read blogs anymore? Who knows. But I figure this is as good a place as any to update the world on the doings of Darci Cole.

As you can probably see from the post history, it's been A While since I posted anything. It's been rough, and I'm just starting to work my way out of it. But now I'm back, and it feels good.

Update #1: I started a youtube series? Click HERE to check out the first (very rambly) video to find out more details about what I've been doing instead of blogging lately, and what the series will be about.

Update #2: I'm pregnant AGAIN? Yes. Again. Cole Baby #4 is due March 2nd, 2018, and we are so excited to meet him.

Update #3: I'm going to jump back into the query trenches soon! This lovely manuscript of mine has been patiently waiting for its final (I hope) revision before going in front of agents, and I'm super excited to see how it does.

Update #4: This blog. I won't be posting every day, but I'm gonna make a goal to post a couple times a month and talk about something I did in writing recently. The posts will probably be super short and very casual and not very edited (agents, please don't hate me) because I Do Not Have The Time to sit and hash out a 1000-word post on something deep and poignant AND also devote time to my manuscripts.

So that's my life in a nutshell right now. It's crazy, and stressful, and maddening sometimes, but I love it. And I feel like I'm finally back to my self after a very long and drudging hiatus.

It's good to be back.

-DC

Books and Pizza!!!!

2017-02-09T09:10:00.001-07:00

Today is special for a couple of reasons...

1. It's National Pizza Day, which by itself is awesome.

2. It's release day for A PIZZA MY HEART!

In case you don't follow me on other social media platforms, allow me to explain: A PIZZA MY HEART is a pizza-themed anthology of short stories for Young Adults, and I am lucky enough to have a story of my own included!

There are a lot of pretty snazzy authors contributing, so you really should check it out. PLUS, it's ON SALE for two more weeks! For only 99 cents you can have a kindle copy of your very own.

BLURB:

Gooey cheese and warm pepperoni, with a side of kissing and murder.
A Pizza My Heart is a quirky and fun anthology that crosses all genres. Fifteen extraordinary authors have united to tell stories of mystery, mayhem, romance, danger, deceit…and pizza.
Sometimes spicy, sometimes cheesy, but always delicious, A Pizza My Heart invites you to explore life, happiness, and the pursuit of pizza.

Add it on Goodreads, purchase it on Amazon, and after reading please leave a review!

Publisher and editor is Jolene Haley with Hocus Pocus & Co. Check out their website.

Cover art by the amazing Haley Crosby, whose artwork you can see more of HERE.

****************

Thank you for supporting authors and creators! Go grab the anthology and a pizza and have a fantastic Pizza Day!

-DC

First Impressions

2017-01-25T12:15:00.003-07:00

For whatever reason, lately I've been kind of obsessed by these tv talent show auditions--specifically the blind auditions on The Voice. I've always loved them but only recently have I started wondering why they fascinate me. I've come to a few conclusions, and I want to talk a little about what they have in common with publishing.

Have what it takes?
First of all, I love to watch the dynamic we see between an aspiring performer and the entertainment professionals. I've wondered how can they possibly know whether someone has what it takes in only a 90-second audition? I was an aspiring singer throughout high school, I have a solid knowledge of music, and despite having to do auditions like this many times myself I still wondered this.

While watching a string of blind auditions for The Voice the other night I decided to try it. I would keep my eyes closed and just listen, then only open my eyes when I felt like--if I were a coach--I would turn my chair. It was interesting to me that sometimes I "turned" super early, and other times I matched one or more of the judges, and yet others just didn't interest me enough.

First of all, this shows just how subjective art is. Second, the more I listened the more I was able to recognize what I liked in a voice and what I didn't, who was trained or experienced and who wasn't, and who had the *spark* and who didn't. Ninety seconds is not much time to show off your abilities, but these professionals know their craft, and they know what they're looking for.

Can you see where I'm going with this?

Agents and editors in the publishing industry are the same as these judges on The Voice. They see hundreds of "auditions" every day in the form of queries and first pages. They know what they like, they know what they're looking for, and they can tell--sometimes within a sentence or two--which submissions have what it takes.

Show Off
Sometimes a singer will come on a show and audition with a song that just doesn't fit them. And the judges can always tell. Sometimes they can sense there's talent, but it's not the best performance. For the performer, that's frustrating. It's hard to know sometimes how best to showcase yourself. The same holds true for writers. It's why we absolutely must surround ourselves with *other* writers. People who--as closely as we can get--mimic those judges, the agents and editors, and can give us the feedback necessary to know how to showcase our talents within a query and first page.

Sometimes the judges/agents pick people with FLAWLESS performances/pages, other times they choose people who obviously need work but have amazing potential. Again, they can tell. Why? Because they are constantly taking in so much content of so much variety. It's one of the biggest reasons writers are told to read so much. We have to gain at least some level of knowledge as to what works and what doesn't so we can be our best.

Sharing
There are some moments where you can see the judges looking to one of them in particular to press their button, because they know that person will be the best judge for that person. Agents do this too, sharing submissions with their colleagues when they feel like that person will be a better fit. Other times, agents fight tooth and nail for a writer, just like the judges do on the show.

Watch this audition and see (starting at about 1:45) how much the judges fight for Wé McDonald to join their team.

I mean, the one advantage we have as writers is that we can ask for a week to decide if we have multiple agents offering representation. *wink* Regardless, you want someone who will fight for you like those judges did for her. You want someone you connect with the way Alicia Keys did with Wé.

Passion
Agents, like these judges, are very selective about the books and people they take on. As John M. Cusick says in this post, agents aren't looking for good books. They're looking for something they love too much to NOT represent it. They're looking for manuscripts and writers they can champion.

These are the special auditions that are not only great enough to get the judge to turn around, but also showcase a performer unique and special enough once seen that they impresses all of America and succeed throughout the competition. That special something, that spark, is what the judges--and agents--are looking for. They take on the singers/writers/manuscripts they truly believe in, and they work with them to make them the best they can be.

Watch this video of Jordan Smith singing "Somebody to Love." He ended up being the 2015 winner, but this performance came during the middle of the competition. Throughout this performance, Jordan's coach, Adam Levine, is cheering him on. But watch how at the end, from about 3:10-3:43, Levine's enthusiasm really comes out. You can see how insanely proud he is of Jordan, how excited he is that the song went well, and--I think--happy to see Jordan succeeding and having fun while he does it.

I can PROMISE you, this is how AwesomeAgents feel when their clients succeed. I had the opportunity to sit with a group of writers and agent Jen Rofé at Storymakers in 2015. We talked genre, and books we loved. Hearing Jen talk about her clients' work was incredible. She was animated, excited, eager, and sometimes speechless with pride for the work she represented.

I'm planning to start querying again in the next couple of months. Fellow writers, we only get a query or a few pages to show what we can do. We need to make the most of it. Work at it, read a lot, get feedback, practice your query the way a singer would for an audition--try different things, arrange words in different ways and see what works for you, what makes you feel confident. The agent or editor you're querying will absolutely know whether (a) you've got what it takes or not and (b) whether they'll love your work or not, based on how you arrange those few hundred words.

Don't take it for granted. Enjoy it. Good luck.

-DC

2016 Thoughts, 2017 Goals

2017-01-05T15:19:00.000-07:00

Y'know, some people can multitask in life, and some people can't. I see people in publishing doing so many things at once--reading slush, agenting, parenting, traveling, editing, revising, drafting, and the list goes on and on. But if there's one thing I've learned about myself in the last five and a half years that I've been writing seriously, it's how much of a binge-er I am.

I am not a multi-tasker. I'm a binge-er.

When I draft a novel, everything else in my life takes a back seat. My kids eat hot dogs and toast for a month and the dishes and laundry pile up until I finally get to them maybe once a week during that time.

When I read a novel, I sit and shut out the entire world. It takes my husband three or more tries to get my attention.

When I clean my house, I put on headphones and listen to a book or a podcast or a lecture on writing and I forget about anything else happening. I could do this for hours.

When I play with my kids, I am present and excited and I don't look at my phone for hours. When I read to them, I abhor being interrupted by anything else.

As most of you probably know, for most of 2016 I was pregnant with my third child. And all of my mental focus went toward that task. You'd think it would just happen subconsciously and I could do other things, but no. Every other section of brain space was limited because of the pregnancy. As evidenced by the fact that I blogged four times the entire year.

I revised well for a while. I drafted 25k words during nano. I read a few books. I mostly kept the house clean. But I could not for the life of me FOCUS on any one thing except Being Pregnant and taking care of my two boys.

And now? Well, the baby is here.

It's been a single exhausting week, and I'm just starting to help her get her days and nights on schedule. She's beautiful and perfect and I couldn't be more grateful that I now have another thing to binge.

Taking care of a newborn is hardest in the first month and a half. After that, things tend to calm down to something resembling a new normal. So for the next five weeks I'm bingeing taking care of a newborn baby. I'm basically in survival mode for a while.

But the thing is, I miss writing. I miss it a LOT. And now that I'm not pregnant my mind keeps floating back to my many manuscripts and side projects and wishing I had the energy to stay awake and work on them instead of sleeping when the baby sleeps. As it is, I'm writing this blog post on my phone while she's sleeping, and I keep nodding off.

But this is why I chose Patience as my word/goal/mood for 2017. Because I know writing will be there waiting for me when my mind and body are ready to get back to it. My baby won't always need me this much, and I won't always be this tired. It's hard to see that far ahead, but I have to keep telling myself these things or I'll crash and burn.

Usually I'm very much a go-getter in my life. I set goals and I achieve them. I say, I'm gonna write this book by this date, and I do it. But with a tiny person who needs me so much, I can't ask so much of myself. So I'm trying to learn to say no to things, to take a step back and take my time when it comes to my personal goals. It's difficult, especially because I have amazing friends who are agented and publishing and doing all the things I want so much to do... but as Aaron Burr says, "I'm willing to wait for it."

My time will come, just... not yet.

I have other things to focus on in the mean time.

-DC

Acceptance

2016-07-11T12:30:00.002-07:00

The good news: I'm fifteen weeks pregnant!

*cue confetti*

The bad news: I haven't written since about week four, and the drive/ability doesn't seem to be returning any time soon.

*cue sad "aww"*

Good news: I have no agent or publisher yet who is demanding me to write when I mentally cannot. (Except for a short story, and I think I'll be able to push through that.)

Bad news: I also have a hard time reading much these days, so refilling the well is not going well either.

Good news: the well refill is sort of happening with a Supernatural binge.

Bad news: .....actually there's no bad part to that. I'm loving Supernatural.

~

Here's the thing: I've been writing pretty consistently for five years, and in that time I've had a baby and raised two boys and moved houses and served in my church children's program and dealt with anxiety and depression and two miscarriages and querying and drafting and revising five and three-halves novels plus multiple short stories and on and on and on.

I think my brain is telling me to take a break.

I'm still a writer. I'm not quitting, because I know I love it and I know it helps me cope with normal life. Writing is a part of me now, and nothing will ever change that. But I'm starting to realize that for this period of time, I need to set my manuscripts aside to focus on me and my family.

I don't know for how long. Hopefully not much longer than the nine to twelve months it takes to grow, birth, and acclimate to a new baby. But if it takes longer, that's okay.

It's difficult to admit I'm setting it aside. It's difficult to see my friends and writers I admire working so hard and accomplishing so much and remembering when *I* did that and wishing, wishing, wishing I could do that right now.

But I need to set it aside.

It's frustrating, but I need to.

If you're the praying type, I could use the support. And if you're not, happy thoughts and good vibes are greatly appreciated.

I love my family, and I'm beyond grateful for this baby I carry. Also, I miss writing. And I don't think the two have to be mutually exclusive.

-DC

(Tumblr link to this post: http://darcicole.tumblr.com/post/147251226354/acceptance)

"Fight Your Way Through"

2016-04-01T15:00:00.000-07:00

A few years ago, I posted an April Fools joke on here that I'd signed with an agent. Well guess what?!

No, I still don't have an agent. *snort*

***

Yesterday I was going through some old papers and folders looking for some information and I came across a one-page handwritten outline for a story. It was vaguely like the one that eventually became the "first" novel I ever wrote, but based on the stuff it was around I knew I had to have written it long before I actually started writing. Speaking of which....

Tomorrow, April 2nd, is my five-year anniversary of Being A Writer.

That's right. Five years ago tomorrow, I sat down and wrote the first sentence of my first novel. I had no idea what I was doing, I had no outline, I had no plan, I had nothing. But I wrote it. I started. Curious to see it? I was, so I looked it up:

Prince Canton sighed in relief as he slouched lazily in his chair. It had been a very long day. He pried his left eye open to look out the window, and visibly flinched when he realized how late it was.

It was pretty terrible, and the book that followed was terrible too, but that didn't stop me from writing it. I wish I knew the exact date that I finished that draft, but the closest I can guess is September 28th-ish of that year. A good six months it took me to write what...53K? Maybe? Oh the follies of youth.

It's incredible, really. Last week I saw Sam Sykes talking about writing advice on Twitter. He said:

So, always, the best advice on how to be a better writer is to just write a whole bunch. Suck at a lot of it. Get better. Invest time.
— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) March 23, 2016

And he's absolutely right. It hit me hard when I saw that, and made me remember one of the first quotes I heard when I started. It was from Ira Glass. I'd heard people say "you've gotta suck at it before you can get better," or something to that end, but Mr. Glass said it in a way that I was able to make a sort of game plan out of it. Take a look:

A gap. A period of years, where you can tell that what you're making isn't as special as you want it to be. It's missing something. And the only way to close that gap, is to write.

Guys, this is a big deal for me. I've been writing for five years. I've been trying, I've been working at it, learning as much as I can, reading, studying, and writing. And it's been five years. That feels like such a long time, and it is. Five years. Five. Years.

The bad news now is I still suck at writing. But the good news is I suck a heck of a lot less now than I did five years ago, and I can confidently say that there are even a few things in writing that I am very, very good at. I hope.

Either way, I needed this reminder. The reminder that in the big picture of things, I am moving forward. I am progressing. It's hard to see that sometimes when it looks like everyone around you is getting agents or selling to editors or releasing a book. I've said it before, but it's conflicting, isn't it, when you are genuinely so thrilled for your friends and their accomplishments, and yet a small part of you wonders...

...will I ever get there?

There's a small part of me that cries inside all the time, no matter how much I try to shut it up. It wonders if after all this time, all I've done is wasted five years of my life. I wonder if these words, these stories I've poured my heart and soul and sweat and tears into will ever ever be good enough to sit on a stranger's shelf. It's hard, sometimes. It's hard to see the bright side through so many clouds.

But the thing is, I'm not going to quit. I know that. I'm too stubborn. I'll keep writing, and I'll keep working, and eventually I'll get published somehow--though who knows when. But I know it won't be easy. And I can't even say that it gets easier. Because you know what?

With AGOS on the shelf all shiny and finished and ADSOM3 on the desk with its guts hanging out, it's hard to remember one becomes the other.
— Victoria/V.E. Schwab (@veschwab) March 13, 2016

Even Bestselling Authors feel this pain.

It's not easy, and the fear of failure is constant. Why do we put ourselves through this? Why do we "suffer for our art" so much? Here's why: because at the end of the day, when someone reads your words and swoons at a kiss, or cries at a death, or laughs at a joke, or swears at you for something you did to their favorite character--

That makes it all worth it. It's weird, I know, but it's true.

So this is my advice to me on my fifth anniversary, and my advice to you no matter what stage of your career you're in: keep writing. Keep creating. Keep dreaming those dreams. The only way you fail, is if you stop trying. So don't stop. Never stop. Keep moving forward; you'll get there.

-DC

The One Word Story - Boys, Baseball, and Biology

2016-01-27T10:46:00.000-07:00

Hey all!

Back in the fall, an awesome guy named Rob Kristofferson invited authors on twitter to participate in #TheOneWordStory project. Basically, we each picked a word, and let a story develop from it. A lot of people were excited to participate, but Rob recently has had to take a step back, so the project has been put on hold.

Since it's kind of in limbo, I've decided to post my #TheOneWordStory here on the blog (and also on my tumblr blog) because I love it a lot and I want to share it with you and see what you think.

The word I chose was Obfuscate.

OBFUSCATE: (verb) render obscure, unclear, or unintelligible.

Boys, Baseball, and Biology

“In here, Jessie.”

I held my breath as I followed Chase Connolly into his bedroom. Boys’ rooms were supposed to smell like dirty socks and gym shorts, right? Last time I’d visited, it had smelled of day-old chocolate milk and cheese sandwich, but that was when we were eight.

“You want a soda?”

I blinked, focusing on Chase who stood by a mini fridge. He had a mini fridge in his bedroom? I glanced from him to the sodas and finally let out my breath.

“Ah, Dr Pepper, please.” The room actually didn’t stink at all. Smelled like that carpet dust stuff people sprinkle before they vacuum. I’d bet my bat and glove his mom did that for him.

He nodded, taking out two Dr Peppers and tossing one to me.

I squeaked—unladylike for sure—and leaned forward to catch it. Those years of little league are really paying off now, I thought.

Chase smiled. “Nice catch. Still got it, huh?”

“Um…got what?”

He shrugged. “You played shortstop. You always caught the fly balls.”

How did he remember…? “Right,” I said. “Um, why don’t we get started?”

“Sure.” He laid down on his bed—a full, not quite queen sized—and reached under to pull out his biology book. I took a seat on the floor, my back to the bed, and got my book out of my backpack.

“Why are you sitting on the floor?” he asked.

I looked up at him. “Um…because there are no chairs.”

He gestured to his bed, raising a brow and giving a smirk I’d seen him use on girls many times.

A blush rose in my cheeks. “I’m good, thanks.”

“Come on, Jess,” he said, rolling his eyes. “We used to be best friends. Teammates, buddies. We can sit on a bed without it getting weird.”

I thought back to game days in t-ball and little league. After every game we’d get our snow-cones and then go back to his house to play Mario Kart. Alone in a room for hours, just him and me. And cheese sandwiches with chocolate milk.

I smiled awkwardly, then moved to sit on the foot of the bed.

“Was that so hard?”

I gave him a flat stare. “Shut up.”

He smiled. Not the smirk though, a real one this time. For just a second, he looked like the old Chase.

I took a breath. “Okay, start by telling me: what’s the last thing you learned in Biology that you feel you really mastered?”

He frowned. “Probably osmosis?”

“Osmosis. Okay, that’s a great starting point. So you’re familiar with diffusion too, right?”

“Um…I think so?” He smiled. His dark hair fell across bright blue eyes as he gave a halfhearted shrug. Even as a kid he’d always been just dumb enough to be cute, and smart enough to know he was.

I shook my head. “Okay. Let’s start from the beginning.” I turned my book to chapter one and found the practice quiz questions. Where ten years ago he used to help me with my throw, now I got to help him with school.

I watched him as he thought of each answer, taking his time like I knew he still did on the baseball field. Unless he was running or throwing, he tried to really consider things. Which pitch to recommend, how the next batter might try to hit, whether he should steal a base or not.

I envied him that—the time on the field. We’d played ball together as kids, sure, but when we reached middle school suddenly it wasn’t cool for a girl to know the batting average of every shortstop in the National League, so…I stopped talking about baseball. I stopped playing. Except with my dad, of course.

For the most part Chase knew all the answers, it just took him a while to think of them. It was like he could score a run, but he had to do it slowly, one hit at a time. He only had real trouble doing a Punnett Square and remembering the Taxonomy Order; both of which should be easy fixes with some one-on-one practice. We were only six weeks into the school year, so there wasn’t much to cover yet.

Gonna be a lot more tutoring in my future… I glanced up at Chase. He was staring at the four Punnett Squares I’d started. I smiled. Might not be a bad thing....

“Why don’t we try a real-life example?” I flipped the paper over and drew a blank rectangle. “What color are your mom’s eyes?”

“Green,” he said.

“Okay, starting with a hard one.” I laughed. “Green eyes are a special case, because they’re dominant over blue, but recessive to brown.”

Chase stared at me.

I bit my lip. “Sorry. Never mind. We’ll get to that.”

“Your eyes are brown?” he asked.

I blinked at him. “Um…yes?”

The blush appeared on his cheeks this time. He gave a half-shrug. “I just…they’re pretty. I never noticed before.”

I stared. “…thanks.” Where did that come from? “Okay, so what color are your dad’s eyes?”

“Blue.”

I nodded, writing a key beside the squares. “So we’ll use a lowercase b for blue eyes, and a capital G for green eyes. Capital B usually stands for brown eyes, but you don’t seem to have any of those in your family.”

“That’s true.”

“Good,” I said. “Things would be a bit more complicated if it wasn’t.”

He laughed, and butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I cleared my throat. “Now, there’s two genes involved in deciding whether you have brown, blue, or green eyes. The first determines brown or blue, and the second determines blue or green. Does that make sense?”

He winced. “Not really…”

I wrote Dad on the right side of the box. “Look. Your dad has blue eyes, which are recessive to everything. If he was carrying a brown-eyed or green-eyed gene at all, that’s what would be coming through in him. But it’s not, so we know that he’s only carrying blue-eyed genes.”
I wrote four lowercase bb’s beside Dad.

Chase frowned. “Okay…”

“Now your mom has green eyes, which means she is also not carrying any brown-eyed genes, or they are the ones that would be manifesting.” I wrote ‘GG, bb, Gb, bb’ under Mom. “But because we know you have blue eyes, we can assume she is likely carrying a blue-eyed gene recessively.”

He looked up from the paper and raised an eyebrow. “You know my eye color?”

Holy foul balls, Batman, the boy was sitting very close to me. I froze for a split-second, then scoffed. “Please, Chase. Your eyes are so blue they could make a dolphin seasick.”

“HA!” he guffawed, looking away. He ran a hand through his hair, looking back at me with another genuine smile.

I tried to keep my grin to a smirk but I’m not sure I succeeded. And the fluttering in my stomach flared up again.

“Wow, um,” he shook with silent laughter. “I’ve never been complimented quite like that before.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything.” My eyes widened after saying it, and I felt my face grow warm yet again. I was starting to think I wouldn’t be able to tutor this boy for very long.

It took me a moment to realize we were looking right at each other. His eyes were intent on me, his mouth open slightly. Then his gaze flickered to my lips, and back to my eyes.

I looked away and shifted my sitting position. Away from the boy. “Right. So, um…here’s what your parents’ Punnett square looks like starting out. All blue on Dad’s side, and some green and some blue on your mom’s side. All you have to do now is combine them to see what the statistical probability of each resulting child’s eye color is.”

He grimaced. “My turn?”

I nodded, handing him the paper. He caught my eye as he took it, and smiled his real smile.

“Hey Jess?”

“Yeah?”

He stared at the paper. “Thanks. For helping me, I mean.”

Damn fluttering stomach.

“Sure,” I said. “What are friends for?”

His eyes met mine, and I knew what he was thinking. We weren’t friends anymore, not really. Hadn’t been for a long time.

He smiled. “We should hang out more.”

I looked to the floor, and couldn’t help smiling too.

From the corner of my eye I saw him refocus on the paper. His expression turning serious, he carefully combined each of the letters the way I’d shown him earlier. I leaned forward to watch, trying to ignore the smell of infield dust and baseball glove leather coming from him.

When he finished, I smiled. “You got them all right.”

He grinned wide. “Really?”

“Yep. So can you tell me, from that, what are the chances of your parent’s kids having blue eyes?”

He stared at the square. “Um…it’s fifty-fifty, isn’t it? Blue or green?”

I nodded.

“Sweet,” he said, looking genuinely pleased.

I pulled out my book again and opened to the Taxonomy section. “Now let’s come up with something to help you remember these.”

He nodded, tossing the paper on the floor and sliding it under his bed.

“Here’s what I think will help,” I said. “We’ll come up with a sentence to help you remember the Taxonomy Order. What’s your favorite thing to eat, or talk about, or something?”

“Baseball.” He said, grinning like a five-year-old who got a pony for Christmas. “I love to play baseball. Or watch it, or talk about it.”

I nodded. Should’ve seen that one coming. I knew a lot about baseball. I could do that. But I had to do it so that he came up with it himself. I’d hid my baseball knowledge since those days of pariah-level banishment from the cool-girl crowd in middle school and I wasn’t yet prepared to make it known again.

Focus, Jessie. “Look at these letters,” I paused and ripped a sheet of paper from one of my spiral-bound notebooks and wrote out the letter for each classification from the top of the page to the bottom. Sliding one foot off the bed, I leaned forward so we could both see the paper easily. “What words come to mind when you see these?”

He frowned. It was adorable to watch his brows come together while he was thinking. “Double-play, Pitcher, Grand Slam…”

I wrote the words next to their corresponding letters. “Good. Good start.” Now, how to get him to come up with a sentence that made sense without me helping? “Anything else?”

He frowned deeper, staring at them. “D for Diamondbacks,” he said. “L…lucky?”

I wrote them in. “Lucky Diamondbacks,” I said. “Those are for Life and Domain. And you said Pitching before,” I wrote that in, and then slipped in Keep for the K.

Chase leaned closer to me. “Lucky Diamondbacks Keep Pitching…”

I bit my lip. He was really close to me.

“Close!” I said. “Keep Pitching Close?”

He raised a brow, turning to look at me. “Yeah, that’ll work.”

I swallowed. I could feel his breath on my neck he was right there. “Okay, so Lucky Diamondbacks Keep Pitching Close…close to what? Or for how long?” Was I sounding like I knew baseball, or not?

“Over,” he said, pointing to the O. His hand brushed mine as he pulled it back, sending a shiver up my arm. “Over Four Game Series!” he finished, pulling away and punching the air.

My whole body breathed a sigh of relief.

“Ha!” he laughed. “That actually happened you know. Aaron Hill a couple years ago was one of the only uninjured pitchers so he had to close four games in a row and—” He stopped, waving a hand. “Sorry, I could ramble baseball all day.”

I smiled, flipping through my book to the next section. “It’s worth rambling about,” I muttered. “The poor guy had to ice his arm for a week afterward.”

Chase paused. “Wait, what?”

I froze. “Hm?”

He looked me over. I didn’t move. I was the science nerd, not a jock or a cheerleader or even a gamer or a bandie, I was the forgotten-friend-science-nerd, here to tutor him so he’d pass the midterm and not lose his chance at a full ride scholarship. That’s it.

He didn’t know my dad got me season tickets to the D-Backs games every year, or that I had an awesome collection of cards under my bed the way he had his bio book under his. No one knew, and for a long time, I’d preferred it that way. Did I still?

I was blushing. I knew I was blushing. I stared at my bio book.

“Okay, so the next question is—”

“No, no, no,” he said, scooting closer. There was a grin on his face…but it wasn’t the grin I was used to him having. Not the smirk he used to hit on girls, and not the sweet smile he’d given me earlier, but some kind of adorable, curious, hesitant, excited combination of the two. Was that possible? He was looking right at me. Damn, his eyes are really blue….

He licked his lips.

Oh, sweet centerfield…

“Diamondback’s first baseman?”

“Paul Goldschmidt.” I gasped, clapping my hands over my mouth.

He laughed. “Starting pitcher last night?”

“Robbie Ray!” I said through my hands.

“You do know baseball!”

Obviously he could speak Muffled.

He punched the air. “This is awesome!”

My hands slowly lowered as I stared at him. A hesitant relief began to seep into me, dimming the fear. “You…you think so?”

“Are you kidding me?” he said. “The beautiful girl who I’ve had a crush on for years, is sitting in my room, she knows baseball, and can help me not fail biology and she likes Dr Pepper. This is like, all the dreams come true I never knew I had!”

Beautiful?

Wait…crush?

Immediately, I became very aware of the fact that I was sitting beside him, on his bed, and the door to his room was closed. I swallowed. He kept laughing. My palms began to sweat.

“Do you still play?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Not really. There’s not exactly a girls high school baseball team.”

“True.” He nodded. Then he sat up and turned so he was facing me. “I’d practice with you. I mean, if you wanted. And I bet I could get a bunch of the team to join us.”

Teasing, taunting voices filled my head. I closed my eyes. I had to get past this.

“That…might be fun.”

Chase’s face lit up, then he tried to straighten it, to be serious.

He wasn’t very successful.

“Who’s your favorite player?”

I pressed my lips together to keep from smiling. “Nick Ahmed.”

He nodded, smiling. “Shortstop, of course.”

“You?”

“Goldschmidt.”

“You’re so predictable.”

He laughed, looking away.

I blushed. Again.

“Do you…” he started, “do you still play any video games?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Just the Lego ones.”

“I’ve got Lego Star Wars. Wanna play?”

I narrowed my eyes. “Which one?”

He leaned forward. “The combined one. All three.”

I gave a small smile. “Okay, yes, but, not until we get through the rest of these questions.”

He groaned and threw himself back on his bed. My smile widened. He really was cute when he wanted to be, the putz.

“Okay, okay, go. I am gonna kick your ass as Luke.”

I scoffed. “Please. Everyone knows Rey is the best character on there.”

“She’s untrained!” He sat up, turning to face me. “She’d never make it without help.”

“Well it’s a good thing she has it, huh?”

“Yeah, good thing they can keep her from ruining everything.”

“Ruin? And Luke is any better? If it were up to him he’d be at Toshi Station buying power converters and he’d never have done a damn thing with his life!”

Somewhere in there, I’d thrown my book aside, and Chase had moved closer. Even with my tirade, he was now only inches from my face. His mouth was open, like he’d been about to argue back but then stopped…and he looked just as surprised as I felt.

“Y-you,” he cleared his throat. “You were gonna ask me another question.”

I blinked. My heart pounded in my chest. “Could we maybe discuss the anatomical juxtaposition of two orbicularis oris muscles in a state of contraction?”

He smiled, leaning forward. “I have no idea what you just said.”

“Kissing,” I said. “It’s the…scientific definition of—”

His lips touched mine. Soft and warm, and he tasted like Dr Pepper. Then he kissed me again, and again, many small kisses that felt like one long one. Like a twenty-inning game that didn’t feel like twenty innings because the teams kept scoring.

His hand cupped my cheek, his calloused thumb catching on my hair. Just when I started to get bored with the repetitive kissing, he caught my bottom lip in his teeth.

Full disclosure: I made a noise. It was like a cross between a sigh and a moan? But that makes it sound way too sexy. It really wasn’t. It was more like a squeak.

But then, he pulled away.

My breathing was erratic, my pulse even more so. Chase had backed all the way across the bed and was leaning against his wall. He stared at me with wide eyes.

“I…” pain blossomed in my chest. I screwed it up. Somehow I blew my one random chance with an amazing guy, an adorable first baseman who tasted like Dr Pepper and smelled like a baseball glove and kissed like he was in the damn movies. “I should go.”

I picked up my book and snatched my backpack and phone from the floor before barging out the door.

“Jessie, wait—”

I shoved my book in as I opened his front door and went to my car. Where were my keys? I knew I put them in the side pocket.

“Jess!”

Got ‘em. I shoved the key into the driver’s side door and turned it just as Chase caught up to me. I opened the door and threw my bag in.

“Jessie! Would you talk to me?”

I paused. Tears burned in my eyes, and I blinked to force them away before I turned to face him, my car door a barrier between us.

“What did I do wrong?”

He shook his head. “What? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Then why did you jump away and look all scared?”

His eyes widened again but this time it looked like a light bulb had come on above his head. And then he frowned. “I…I was scared. A little.”

“What’s that supposed to—”

“I mean,” he said, “that was a really good kiss. And it…it surprised me.”

I stared at him. I’m a people watcher. And believe me, I watched the cute guys at school. I watched how they talked to girls, and teachers and their friends. Over the years, I had watched Chase Connolly talk to a lot of people. Never once had I seen him wear an expression so open, so…earnest.

“You,” he said, stepping closer to the door with a smile. “You surprised me.”

I bit my lip.

“Oh, don’t do that,” he said.

“What?”

“Bite your lip,” he said. “Bad idea. You kept doing it upstairs and I swear my self-control was this close to snapping.” He held up his thumb and forefinger only a tiny bit apart.

I narrowed my eyes. Then I bit my lip again, letting my teeth graze over it.

Chase cleared his throat, closing his eyes and shaking his head. He took a deep breath.

I snorted.

Chase’s eyes shot open and a grin lit up his face.

“Come on,” I said. “I’m not sexy!”

“You really, really are,” he said.

The way he looked at me then made his normal smirk look like a three-year-old’s attempt at painting the Mona Lisa. My breath caught in my chest. He actually…wanted me?

He sighed, leaning against my car door. “Please come back? I really do need help with Bio, and…I really would like to play Lego Star Wars with you.”

I looked him over.

“I’ll give you another Dr Pepper,” he said.

I raised a brow.

“And,” he raised his hands, “if we finish by six we can watch the D-Backs game on my dad’s big screen.”

I couldn’t believe it. We hadn’t spent time together in years; this poor boy had no idea what he was asking for, pleading to spend time with me, watch or play baseball together, bribing me with sodas…. But, despite us going separate ways after little league, he likely still knew me better than anyone else our age.

And he was a good guy. A flirt when he wanted to be, but he could turn it off too. I’d seen him in serious mode on game days, when he’d wear his baseball jersey and blue jeans with Converse sneakers like they did in the movies. And he would barely talk to anyone, he was so focused on the game. I liked him. A lot.

I had for a long time.

I gave a hesitant smile. “You’re cute when you beg.”

“I can do this all day, sweetie.”

My stomach flutters went crazy.

I stepped around my door, shutting and locking it. “Actually we need to be done by five.”

He frowned. “Oh.”

“Because,” I said, grinning, “We’re going to the game tonight.”

“Wh-the-the game?”

I stepped closer to him, my palms sweating again, heart racing. “So, you’ve um…hit first base once, Connolly. You plan to do it again?”

A blush rose on his cheeks then, and his hands found my waist. “Who knows,” he said. “Maybe sometime tonight we’ll see second?”

I frowned and shook my head. “Not a chance.”

“Understood,” he said, nodding. “But it’s okay if I revisit first?”

I slowly slid my hands around his neck. His lips brushed mine as he drew me close. “Yeah,” I said, in a breath. “I’m okay with that.”

***

I had a lot of fun with this and I'm glad I got the chance to write it.

I hope you liked it too!

-DC

Things Get Brighter

2016-01-14T00:56:00.003-07:00

Heyyyyyy guys.

So it's been a long while...last post was September. And boy, did things happen. Let's do a little update on life and writing....

October 1st, I found out I was pregnant again. Yay!

November 4th, I miscarried again :(

November 6th, I met with my chiropractor, a family friend we've known for years, and he could tell something was off. He adjusted me, then took me into his office and said, "Talk to me. Something's wrong. Tell me what's going on."

Floodgates open, I proceeded to vent all my anger, despair, frustration, and fears to him. Things I had only spoken to my husband about, and problems to which we didn't have answers. Was something wrong with me? Would I ever be able to have another child? How could we possibly afford what it might take to fix me, physically or mentally or otherwise? As I type this, my chest is tight, and there are tears in my eyes, remembering the pain I felt that day, and how hard it was to let it go, to actually voice the fears in my heart.

Bless his heart, my chiropractor listened, and he helped. By the next Monday, I had a sample pack of a mineral supplement he'd recommended. I took it all that week and actually was able to manage my life. When I ran out the following week, I crashed again, and realized I needed that help consistently.

Since November 18th, I've been taking this supplement. While I still have rough days, I haven't had any so low as before. It's been a huge blessing in my life, and I thank God that He sent me to my chiropractor that day and knew that for our circumstances, this is what I needed.

I won NaNoWriMo on Nov 23rd, a whole week early.
I got through Christmas mostly unscathed despite some fears. The holidays in general weren't as fun for me this year as they usually are, and I'm still not sure why.
Now it's 2015 and I have new goals, and a new perspective.

I'm 50K into my current novel, a YA modern mythology fantasy about Phoenixes, and I haven't yet hit the "I hate this" point, so I'm hoping I'll get it drafted by Feb. 13th.

I am registered for #Storymakers16, and signed up for a query critique with an agent I'm super excited to meet.

I've started writing some fanfiction in my spare time because I love it and it's fun and a little therapeutic for me.

My boys are six and three, and are like...kids, now. They're not babies anymore, though I love that my three-year-old still cuddles with me every day.

My husband and kids are all happier when I'm happy, and I have my vitamins to thank for that. I no longer get drawn into a downward spiral of negative thoughts, and I'm able to get more done throughout the day, whether that's work, writing, or play.

I couldn't be more grateful.

Life is sometimes hard, but things always get better. They get brighter. In the darkness, it's hard to remember what the light feels like, hard to remember it will come. But it does.

Thank you to those who supported me and cheered me on through the last three months. You made the dark days bearable.

May your life always be filled with light. <3

-DC

Busy busy busy!

2015-09-06T23:14:00.003-07:00

Hey guys! How's your September going?

If you're wondering about my last post, no, I didn't get picked for Pitch Wars. I was quite heartbroken at first, not gonna lie, but my amazing CPs are helping me move on. I'll soon be querying two more novels, along with the one that's already out with agents right now.

The side bars on this blog haven't been updated in a while, in case you couldn't tell. I'll get on that.

Otherwise, life is pretty good! I'm very busy with Church responsibilities lately, and I am wanting to write more than ever. Between those, my kids, husband, family, and housework I kind of feel like my life is a roller coaster.

But also, in the last two months I was able to revise my YA Fantasy, and my MG Adventure, and got a few more requests from queries. Plus, I had the AMAZING opportunity to beta read a book for a superawesomefamous author I love that comes out in the spring. I'm beta reading for friends, and thinking about which book to work on next.

Also watching through Firefly for the third or fourth time because that's always a good thing.

Anyway, all this is just to say, you're awesome. Keep moving forward. It's not over until you say it is.

<3

DC

#PitchWars 2015!

2015-08-06T23:01:00.004-07:00

Hey hey friends!

Today, I'm setting up a linky list, where hopeful mentees of #PitchWars 2015 can link their blogs. This is totally unofficial, and I do not have Brenda Drake's permission to do it, so if I get the order to shut 'er down, I will. Fair warning.

But since I'm interested in hearing from the other mentees and getting to know them, I'm excited to host a little get-together!

As a sort of guideline, I'm including my bio here, for your enjoyment. Mentees, the linky is below.

If you are not entering #PitchWars 2015, please do not link up. If you do your link will be deleted. This is only for those who are entering. Thank you!

We don't mean to exclude, so please comment on our blogs and say hi!

Here are some rules for your bio:

1. Tell us a teeny bit about the book your pitching, maybe a comp title or two, but NOT the pitch you have prepared!
2. Tell us about yourself, and what you love to write.
3. Maybe include a .gif, because they're awesome

Here's mine :

I'm a wife to my awesomesauce husband, and a stay-at-home-mom to two insanely crazy boys, ages five and three. I've been writing seriously for about four and a half years, and have made it my goal to learn as much as I can in that time. I've written four-and-a-half novels, three YA fantasy, one YA SciFi, and one MG adventure. I'm entering #PitchWars with a brand new shiny that I haven't sent anywhere else.

The manuscript I'll be submitting is a fantasy that feels (or so I'm told) like a YA version of a Brandon Sanderson novel. The main characters are a girl with a painful past, and a boy running for his life, who do not fall in love with each other. There's intrigue, and duels, and secrets, and magic, and quite a bit of blood.

So. Y'know.

I may not be able to say that I've been writing since I was two, or that I started my first novel when I was thirteen, but I have been writing steadily since I started, and reading widely. I was an editorial intern for Entangled Publishing, and I won fourth place in a first chapter contest at the LDStorymakers Writing Conference last May.

So that's me! I can't wait to get to meet all the rest of you!

-DC

Tuesday Night Musings

2015-07-14T21:55:00.001-07:00

Hiya guys! It's been a while.

What have I been up to, you ask? Well....

I finished rewriting TARGET and sent out a batch of queries. So far I've got two Fulls out! So that's exciting.

I've been taking a break to refuel, writing a little here and there. Mostly I'm plowing through SUPERNATURAL and FRIENDS, neither of which I've ever watched before.

I've camped, gone on dates, played at the park, and colored my hair back to red-brown. (pictures soon)

I've read part of a book from one of my best friends (hi Rachel!), cleaned my house dozens of times, and haven't folded a single piece of laundry. (Not entirely true, but it sure seems like it.)

I've got my five-year-old all registered for school, and he is so excited I can't wait to see him grow!

The two-year-old is doing great, too. On his way to potty-training soon, I think.

Coming up we've got the Harry Potter Party, AKA #PotterParty15, and Brandon is out doing himself with the wands he's making this year. I can't wait to show you guys!

After that, Monkey goes to school and Brandon starts teaching Ballroom dance, and I get to focus on keeping the house clean. As usual.

All in all, it's turning out to be a fantastic summer!

How's your summer going?

-DC

Cover Reveal: LIBRARY JUMPERS

2015-05-27T23:55:00.000-07:00

HELLO EVERYONE!

Sorry I haven't posted at all this month aside from cover reveals. Been busy! But I promise I've got a good personal post on the way for you.

For now, I am beyond excited to help reveal the beautiful cover for LIBRARY JUMPERS by Brenda Drake!

I "met" Brenda online a couple years ago during query contests, because her contests are the best. And even then I knew about this awesome book with libraries and hot boys in it. And soon, it's gonna be here!

First, as always, a blurb:

Gia Kearns would rather fight with boys than kiss them. That is, until Arik, a leather clad hottie in the Boston Athenaeum, suddenly disappears. While examining the book of world libraries he abandoned, Gia unwittingly speaks the key that sucks her and her friends into a photograph and transports them into a Paris library, where Arik and his Sentinels—magical knights charged with protecting humans from the creatures traveling across the gateway books—rescue them from a demonic hound.

Jumping into some of the world's most beautiful libraries would be a dream come true for Gia, if she weren’t busy resisting her heart or dodging an exiled wizard seeking revenge on both the Mystik and human worlds. Add a French flirt obsessed with Arik and a fling with a young wizard, and Gia must choose between her heart and her head, between Arik's world and her own, before both are destroyed.

And now, the coverrrrrrr...

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

Goodreads | Pre-Order Amazon | Pre-Order B&N

SO PRETTY, RIGHT?

Brenda Drake, the youngest of three children, grew up an Air Force brat and the continual new kid at school until her family settled in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Brenda’s fondest memories growing up is of her eccentric, Irish grandmother’s animated tales, which gave her a strong love for storytelling.

So it was only fitting that she would choose to write young adult and middle grade novels with a bend toward the fantastical. When Brenda’s not writing or doing the social media thing, she’s haunting libraries, bookstores,and coffee shops or reading someplace quiet and not at all exotic (much to her disappointment).

Follow Brenda!

Blog | Goodreads | Twitter | Facebook.

**Cover Reveal Organized by YA Bound Book Tours**

SEE, YOU GUYS?!?! It sounds awesome. So go add it to your Goodreads page, and pre-order it, and follow Brenda in all the places, so you can be in the know when LIBRARY JUMPERS hits the shelves!

-DC

COVER REVEAL: THE YEAR OF LIGHTNING

2015-05-06T05:00:00.000-07:00

Follow Ryan on Twitter,
Facebook,
or his blog.

Darci here! I am absolutely DELIGHTED to have Ryan Dalton (a.k.a. Batman) on the blog today to share the cover for his debut novel, THE YEAR OF LIGHTNING! You guys will LOVE it! Take it away, Ryan!

***

Hey, book fans! Don’t you hate it when you move to a new town and discover it’s being destroyed by freak lightning storms? Let me tell you, that makes for a tough year.

You’ll find that, and much more, in my debut YA novel THE YEAR OF LIGHTNING. I am completely in love with this cover and so excited to share it with you. After you drink in its awesomeness, keep scrolling down for a giveaway contest that you can participate in right here in the comments.

First, a summary:

The house has no doors. It’s been abandoned for decades. Yet one night, Malcolm sees a face in the window. Fifteen-year-old twins, Malcolm and Valentine Gilbert, never imagined an old house across the street could be so much trouble. A secret machine inside has woken up, and its power is growing.

Meanwhile, lightning storms are breaking out all over town. They’re getting worse every week and seem to enjoy striking kids who just want to pass science class and mind their own business. Lightning, however, is rarely cooperative—and when Malcolm and Valentine discover a connection between the house and the storms, their situation goes from mysterious to crazy stupid dangerous. As they hunt a powerful enemy, they’ll realize that lightning is only the beginning. Their town’s very existence hangs in the balance, and the only clues are written in the sky.

And the cover!

(SOOOO COOL, RIGHT?!? Now back to Ryan.... -DC)

One huge way you can support authors is by pre-ordering their books. So if THE YEAR OF LIGHTNING sounds like fun to you, click here to pre-order.

Now, onto the giveaway contest!

How would you fight a lightning storm? In one paragraph, tell us exactly how you’d do it, and don’t hold back! Get as crazy/silly/stupid/super-tough as you want. The sky is literally the limit. We’ll pick a winner from each participating blog, and I will send each winner a package containing an awesome secret clue to the central mystery in THE YEAR OF LIGHTNING.

Thanks so much for stopping by to see the cover!

Ryan Dalton

***

I CANNOT WAIT for this book, you guys! I read an old draft over a year ago, and I loved it then. Now, I'm certain it's only gotten better. Ryan is a super talented writer, and he'll knock your socks off with this one. So go preorder now, and support an amazing debut author!

-DC

Write What You Want

2015-04-29T23:26:00.002-07:00

Hi guys! I've got something on my mind, so I thought I'd share.

See, my friend Beau is pretty gifted with short stories. He's written a few for various blogs, and even has one published in a literary anthology. I'm not lying, he's good. He also has this AWESOME concept for a YA Fantasy novel that I have been encouraging him to write for FOREVER. And I think I finally convinced him to finish it this year.

Tonight, on Twitter, he was lamenting his predictions that his ability to slam dunk a short story won't translate well into an 85K word novel. And that got me thinking.

In one of his online lectures, Brandon Sanderson recommended writing what you want to write in the long run. That means if you want to write novels, learn how to write a novel. And spend ALL your writing energy on THAT. If you want to write short stories, then write LOTS of short stories, and learn what makes a good one.

The moral of this story is: Don't learn one form and then expect to be able to jump right into the other. You won't be able to.

Short stories take less time. Because of that, it's easy to feel like you're making a lot of progress when you finish a story a week. But if you want to write novels, finishing one short story a week won't help you.

Now, it's absolutely possible to do both. Mary Robinette Kowal is the one I'm most familiar with, who writes both novels and short fiction. I'm certain there are many more. But the key to doing both, is studying both and finding the key differences.

I write short stories for fun. Between novels/revisions, or when I'm bored and have a cool idea I think might work. But even the ones I've submitted tend to have bigger stories behind them, and would usually, maybe, do better in a longer form. A novella, or even a novel. I don't really know, because I haven't tried to expand any of them yet, but it's on my list of things to do.

All this is to say, you can write whatever you want to write. Go where your passion tells you to go. Just remember that each form and genre and category has rules, and you have to know the rules before you're allowed to try breaking them.

Have fun writing :)

-DC

#BecauseHeLives :: Easter Message

2015-03-29T23:08:00.002-07:00

I love Easter.

It always feels like it comes and goes so quickly, and I don't like that part. I sometimes wish Easter had as much anticipation for people as Christmas does, because Christ's mission on earth would not have been what it was without His Atonement, death, and resurrection. Then I remind myself that with the anticipation comes commercialization, and I realize it's probably best to leave that part out of such an important celebration.

I don't often get churchy on my blog, but since it is my little corner of the internet, I'd like to take a moment to share my feelings about my Savior. If that bothers you, I invite you to skip this post, and wait for the next one. I won't be bothered :)

I know that Jesus Christ suffered for me. He really lived, He really did take all our sins, pain, and sorrow on himself so that we don't have to hurt if we will just give our sorrows over to Him. It might sound pretentious, maybe even naive. Some have even called me a fool.

But I know He lives.

And because He lives, I know I can live too. During this life, I live more fully when I turn to Him in my trials and on bad days, and during those times He comforts me. Sometimes we have to wait the Devil out, and it's always easier with the Lord on our side.

After this life, I know I will live again. Christ was resurrected, and broke the bands of death. Because He was the first, He made the way for all of us to live again after death. My joy cannot be contained when I think of my grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, cousins, friends, and more who I will see again on the other side.

It's all because of Him.

Because of Him, I know my family can be together forever through the power of God. We are bound by His Priesthood, and if we live worthy and always seek Him, we can live together in the Eternities.

It might sound impossible, or idyllic, but I know it's true.

I'm so grateful for the knowledge I have that my Savior knows me and loves me. His love permeates every single aspect of my life, every single day. I love Him, and I am grateful for His life, His sacrifice, and His watchful care.

So whether you celebrate or not, I wish you a Happy Easter.
May your heart be full and your home be a place of peace, safety, and joy.

God lives.
Jesus is the Christ.
I love them, and I'm grateful for their plan.

-DC

#GoingBlue: Part the First

2015-03-29T22:13:00.003-07:00

Some people have asked about my new colored hair, and how we went about getting it from point A to point B. I'm excited to finally get to tell you guys about it!

On March 16th I had an adventure. One that has permanently changed the way I look and feel.

I colored my hair teal.

Here's a summary: I've wanted blue hair since I was 14, but I've never been able to afford it. My dream hair is something like this, only a bit darker:

Then, a few weeks ago my best friend, who is an awesome cosmetologist, and has always cut and colored my hair, offered a trade: I clean her house, and she'll color my hair.

Well. Now or never, amiright?

We talked it over. After a week or two of research and discussion we decided to go for it.
WARNING: there will be a lot of pictures in the post, not all of them pretty.

We set the day for March 16th and went to the salon store. Unfortunately the best blue they offered had been recalled, and so all their other blues had been bought already. I was pretty anxious to just go for it, so we went with TEAL instead and asked them to call us when the blue was back in stock.

Here's what followed.

First, a BEFORE shot:

My hair looks weird there. Waves are doing funky things. NEXT!

Step one: the first bleaching!

Products used:

Goldwell Lightener
Goldwell 20 Volume Developer
Olaplex (<<<--- LOVE this stuff)

Result of the bleaching:

Next session! Before:

My best friend is so patient with all my picture taking. I TOTALLY spaced on taking a shot of the second-bleached hair, but you can see half of it below in the "DURING" shot of getting the teal on.

ALSO I want to note that there are three parts to Olaplex. We used Part One during the bleachings, Part Two after the coloring, and I have Part Three at home to help my hair stay healthy. The amazing thing is, even with two bleachings and a coloring in a single day my hair doesn't feel any more damaged than it did before. Honestly, it even feels slightly better, because the red I had in that before picture was a store-bought box I had done myself, and damaged my hair quite a bit. The Olaplex even helped that, and I am amazed at how awesome my hair feels because of it.

So FUN right?

The color was Tresse Xtremers Teal. And it looked awesome.

Blurry picture, sorry. I warned you these wouldn't be pretty.

But here's what the final result looked like!

So cool, right? I love it. It's been two weeks and I can hardly believe I actually did it!

I want to end with a note to my close friends and family who think it's weird. I just want to say, I know it's weird. You're completely right. It's absolutely insane that I actually went through with this. If you'd told me when I was a teen that I'd do this at 30, I never would have believed you. But I just want to say that I have seen so many positive side affects to this. It's made me feel beautiful. It's made me feel happy every time I look in the mirror or see my photo online. It's given me a boost of faith and kind of set me on a mini-mission to prove that I can be close to God and my Savior despite the odd color of my hair. It's helped me see myself and others in an entirely new way, for the better. I am so happy I did it, and grateful to know that I have supportive friends and family who love me even when I'm weird. Which is all the time, it's just a lot more visible now.

It's been fun to hear from the people who like it, and tough dealing with comments from those who don't, but overall a very positive and exciting experience, and I can't wait to do it again. I heard from my friend this weekend that the blue we wanted is back in stock, and she went and got it already! So hopefully I'll have another fun color post soon.

Thanks for reading!

-DC

THE INFINITE by Lori M. Lee

2015-03-16T05:00:00.000-07:00

Today, my friends, I have the absolute pleasure of sharing with you an author and series I am SO excited about! Lori M. Lee's debut novel GATES OF THREAD AND STONE came out last year, and I adored it. It's a YA Fantasy with a bit of steampunk mixed in. The magic is awesome, the world is vivid, and I ended up so in love with the characters that my heart broke for them time and time again.

Here's a summary of GATES OF THREAD AND STONE:

In the Labyrinth, we had a saying: keep silent, keep still, keep safe.

In a city of walls and secrets, where only one man is supposed to possess magic, seventeen-year-old Kai struggles to keep hidden her own secret—she can manipulate the threads of time. When Kai was eight, she was found by Reev on the riverbank, and her “brother” has taken care of her ever since. Kai doesn’t know where her ability comes from—or where she came from. All that matters is that she and Reev stay together, and maybe one day move out of the freight container they call home, away from the metal walls of the Labyrinth. Kai’s only friend is Avan, the shopkeeper’s son with the scandalous reputation that both frightens and intrigues her.

Then Reev disappears. When keeping silent and safe means losing him forever, Kai vows to do whatever it takes to find him. She will leave the only home she’s ever known and risk getting caught up in a revolution centuries in the making. But to save Reev, Kai must unravel the threads of her past and face shocking truths about her brother, her friendship with Avan, and her unique power.

Now, this past week saw the release of the sequel, THE INFINITE. I was lucky enough to get a copy before release day and started reading it already. The writing is lovely and the heartbreak from the first book plain in the opening pages. I can't wait to see how it ends!!!

Here's a little bit about THE INFINITE:

The walls of Ninurta keep its citizens safe.

Kai always believed the only danger to the city came from within. Now, with a rebel force threatening the fragile government, the walls have become more of a prison than ever.

To make matters worse, as Avan explores his new identity as an Infinite, Kai struggles to remind him what it means to be human. And she fears her brother, Reev, is involved with the rebels. With the two people she cares about most on opposite sides of a brewing war, Kai will do whatever it takes to bring peace. But she’s lost her power to manipulate the threads of time, and she learns that a civil war might be the beginning of something far worse that will crumble not only Ninurta’s walls but also the entire city.

In this thrilling sequel to Gates of Thread and Stone, Kai must decide how much of her humanity she’s willing to lose to protect the only family she’s ever known.

GAAAH SO COOL! And would you LOOK at those covers?? I just think they're gorgeous. So when I volunteered to do a post for Lori's blog tour, I got to ask her one question to answer here on my blog. My question was: World building GoTaS. How did you know/decide which elements would work, and were there any details you had considered but didn't use?

I loved her answer because it just shows how you can have all the cool ideas in the world, but writing an awesome story takes the right balance. You can't just throw anything together and expect it to be perfect. Sometimes you have to set things aside for a different tale. Anyway, I'll let Lori tell you more. Take it away, Lori!

The world of Gates of Thread and Stone began a bit differently than the one you read about in the book. In the early drafts, the book was a cyberpunk fantasy. There were equal parts scifi and fantasy. In the end, I had to discard a lot of the scifi elements, but you can still see the remnants in the final product.

When I was making changes to the presence of technology in Kai’s world, I had to decide what could stay and what had to go. Considering what a vital landmark the Labyrinth was, I couldn’t just scrap the trains. So I had to come up with a plausible explanation for why they’d be there, which also helped to solidify the history of Kai’s world and the war that took place prior to the beginning of the book.

Here are a couple examples straight from an early draft of Gates of Thread and Stone.

The characters had I-chips embedded into their forearms:
I crossed into the North District, and the spot beneath the crease of my elbow twinged as the scanpoint read my Identification-chip.

Rather than runners, citizens used conpoints to contact the Watchmen:
The nearest conpoint was around the corner. Unless you had a WINEM—Wireless Interactive Neural Messaging—implant, a conpoint was the only way to get a hold of the Watchmen short of walking into their local unit, which I sure as drek wasn't doing. But if I used it to call for help, it would scan my Identification-chip. Using a conpoint came with a ridiculous tax, credits Reev and I couldn't spare, and my I-chip would tell the machine exactly where to charge it.

There was a subway system:
A steady stream of human traffic flowed to and from the entrance to the subtrains just outside the building. I waded through the pushing bodies to reach the other side of the street. Reev had forbidden me from using the subs—too many incidents happened down there.

There were holoscreens and vadverts (virtual advertisements):
The Raging Bull was the fifth building down the long strip of businesses along the riverfront. Above the name, a large holoscreen announced 'Half off all Cyber Rooms during Week of Sun.'

There were no Grays. Instead, they had hovercycles (and biker gangs!):
Avan pressed a combination of buttons, and the control panel lit up. The headlights flashed on, and the secondary propulsion system fired up with a low hum, slowly lifting the bike off the ground. A series of whirrs and clicks sounded as the large gray wheels tilted from vertical to horizontal beneath us and the primary hover propulsion took over, blurring the dirt beneath us with a shimmering heat visible even in the dark.

Although I was sad to see so many scifi elements go, I certainly plan to use them again in a future book :)

Those just sound SO cool. You can bet I'll be reading all of her future books and looking for some of those elements! (Side note, isn't it amazing how many ideas there are? SO MANY. Enough for everyone!)

If YOU want a copy of Gates of Thread and Stone or The Infinite then head out to your local bookstore and buy it! Or if it's not there, order it! If you live in a place with no local bookstore, then I feel bad for you. But just for you, here are the buy links for both books! (Available in hardcover, OR ebook, OR audiobook!)

Gates of Thread and Stone

The Infinite

And make sure to follow the amazing Lori Lee on every platform you possibly can, (Website, Tumblr, Goodreads, Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram) because she's awesome and fun and brilliant!

*Whew* I really hope I copied all those links right. Thanks for reading, guys. Now go out and get these awesome books!

-DC

My Copywork Story (Part 2)

2015-03-02T05:00:00.000-07:00

Greetings fair readers! I might be channeling Thor a little in that welcome, but I don't mind at all. HOW ARE YOU? I hope 2015 has been good to you so far. It's been a while since I just wrote out some thoughts, and I had an interesting experience just this week, so I'd like to share it with you.

Almost a year ago, in April of 2014, I wrote Part One of this story. I'm sad, and slightly ashamed, to say that I didn't keep up with my copywork as much as I'd wanted to. I did it every other night or so through the month of April last year, and then didn't pick it up again until this very week. Yet, I am astounded at how much of an effect it has on my writing.

As of last night I finished that yellow legal pad I started back in April, and moved on to a spiral notebook. I'm currently about 30% through THE EMPEROR'S SOUL, plus I have a bit of poetry and non-fiction scattered throughout that legal pad as well. It wasn't until I'd gotten through a pretty intense scene that I decided I wanted to switch to my own work for a while.

For the last few weeks my main focus has been world building; I wanted to work out the details of the magic system in particular. As of yesterday I felt like I had a pretty solid handle on it, and decided to give drafting a shot. So I sat down at Starbucks today and (for the 483927th time) re-wrote chapter one of a book I'm working on.

I immediately sent it off to two CPs and within a couple of hours had GLOWING feedback. I love my CPs, but I'd never heard them praise me like this. There were still things that could be fixed, of course, but since I'm calling it a first draft I expected those. What mattered to me was that my writing had improved. And it had.

I'm sure my intense world building efforts had a lot to do with the change, but even at a sentence level I could tell the copywork had helped. I was noticing more closely how varied (or not) my sentence structure was, I could feel the character's voice flow more easily, and I felt more confident in my abilities, having just absorbed so much of a great story via handwritten copying.

I can't tell you how cool I think this is. Even after just a couple of days doing it, I feel addicted. I want to get back to it, absorb more, and give myself more fuel to my creativity.

Have I ever blogged about that? How I believe creativity begets more creativity? Art makes more art? I feel like I have... ah, here it is :)

So that's my update. I'm hoping to continue doing it longer than a month this time, but we shall see. Last year got pretty rough, so I'm not making any promises.

Have you tried this? How has it worked or not for you? I'd love to hear!

-DC