If your profile is terrible then your success rate contacting any girls will be terrible as well.  OK so you have a profile set up and you found a girl you want to contact so now what do you say?

If you want a magic line that works with every girl it does not exist.  While there may be some very good cut and paste opening messages if I posted them here online they wouldn’t be very good for long especially since everyone would bomb myspace and facebook with them.  So instead of giving you a message to cut and paste I am going to give you the formula for a great opening message to contact a girl with.

EVERY TIME YOU MESSAGE A GIRL ON FACEBOOK AND MYSPACE FOR THE FIRST TIME YOUR MESSAGE SHOULD CONTAIN ALL 3 OF THE FOLLOWING PARTS:

1: HOW YOU FOUND HER PROFILE — The first thing a girl thinks when she sees your message is “How did this guy find my profile?”

You can answer this various ways and there isn’t a correct way just experiment around but an example would be if the girl on myspace or facebook was named Jenny you could say “I was looking for a friend of mine named Jenny and randomly saw your profile”  You should test different lines but you just need to answer the “how you found her profile” question.

2: WHY YOU ARE QUALIFIED TO CONTACT HER– Immediately after she asks herself how you found her profile, she will ask “Why did he send me a message?”

Your response should answer this as well.  It can be any reason but you NEED a reason for contacting her.  An example reason might be  “You seem like a cool person from your profile (at least your taste in music isn’t bad)”

3. A CALL TO ACTION —-  So now she knows how you found her profile, and why you contacted her, SO WHAT??!  why should she even talk to you?!  This is probably the most important part of the message.  YOU HAVE TO GIVE HER SOMETHING TO RESPOND TO.

This call to action can be a statement.  ex “You are trouble! I can tell!”

that statement gives her something to respond to because now she can message you and say “No I’m not trouble! or Yea I’m a bit naughty =P” or whatever.  Either way you want to give her something to respond to.  The above is just a sample of a statement you can make.

More commonly though the call to action is a Question.  A question is better for obvious reasons since you are directly giving her something to respond to.  An example of this could be “So are you cool enough to be my friend?”  It directly gives them something to respond to.  

Now if you put the 3 together you get a basic opening message.

“I was looking for a friend of mine named Jenny and randomly saw your profile.  You seem like a cool person! (at least your taste in music isn’t bad). So are you cool enough to be my friend?”

Now that is just a very basic example and probably not a good message to actually send out but it does cover all 3 bases.  You can include more in an opening message but you want at the bare minimum to include those 3 elements. 

One way some myspace and facebook dating advice gurus say you should do this is by doing a mistaken identity opener like.

“Jenny!  I can’t believe how much fun we had at X bar last night!  You totally were trying to get my drunk to take advantage of me!”

These openers though follow the exact same 3 part philosophy thats why they may work. 

The “I can’t believe how much fun we had at X bar” part tells her 1. how you found her and 2. why you are contacting her  (even though you are pretending to mistake her for someone else it still gives her a reason for you contacting her)  the final statement about taking advantage of you is actually a call to action.  Even though it is a statement saying you were totally trying to…  it is a statement that gives her something to respond to and talk about with.  I personally do not like these openers but some people swear by them so thought I should throw it out there.   Good luck and remember the 3 parts!

1. HOW YOU FOUND HER PROFILE

2. WHY YOU ARE QUALIFIED TO CONTACT HER

3. A CALL TO ACTION

Share This

            Network pages were great for meeting women on Facebook.  There is a message board on each page and any women asking questions or wanting to chat on the board were great targets to start a conversation with.

            Since social networks are changing constantly it just comes with the territory that some strategies and some of the older articles will not apply.

Share This

Once you click “yes” on a girl it will then alert her the next time she signs on Facebook and she can click “yes” or “no” in response. If you both click “yes” then it leads to a “double match.” At this point it will let you Facebook message the girl.

When you click the option to send them a message it will show their full name. I would recommend that you type in her name in the search field and look at her profile before you message her.

You can experiment with different messages based on your personality but one of the ones I like to use, that has been very successful is “We double matched on Hot or Not (insert girls name)! I am just not ready to get married yet though… So we will have to take things slow =P You ok with that?”

No matter what your message says, this is a great way to meet women.

Share This

Valentines is a day centered around passion and romanticism.  A big part of both of these is enthusiasm.

Meeting girls on Facebook and Myspace is not any different.  You have to be enthusiastic when you talk with them.  A lot of dating gurus will say that you should match the energy given off by the other person.  If you meet a girl at a bar for example and she is really cutting loose and you are completely boring and dull it will probably not work out.  Online is the same way you have to show energy in your messaging.

You could say “Hey, what’s up? we haven’t talked in a while”  or you could say “Hey! We haven’t talked in forever! What’s up?”  It may seem a little “girly” but it has a lot more energy and basically screams for a response.  Not only that but she will be more energetic in her response.  If you get energy going in a conversation its alot easier to convert that what I call “potential energy” in the conversation into a “kinetic energy” of you two actually meeting up.

Now it may be a little late to get a Facebook or Myspace Valentines date.  If you start meeting new people or adding enthusiasm into the conversations with the people you currently talk to on these social networks though, you will be increasing your success and have a waiting list for you by next year.

Share This

So if you are reading this I assume that you want to be a better kisser. Before I can give you the smooching secrets though, we must first decide what a good kisser is. A good kisser in my opinion boils down to 5 key elements.

Adaptability- If you want to be the best kisser in the world and work some real kissing magic, you have to be able to adapt. Ask them what they like or just be alert to what is going well and use that as your kissing guide.

Comfort- If you make them feel comfortable around you, the smooching will be a lot more enjoyable and genuine. What are some ways to increase comfort?

1. Go to a Safe and familiar environment.

2. Don’t be overly aggressive

3. Start slow and progress at a comfortable pace

4. Use eye contact and communication

Mental Connection- I don’t care how physically attracted you are to her or him but if there is no mental connection, you will not be the best kisser. Even if you have the dynamics down perfectly, you will never be able to compete with someone that has decent dynamics and an intense mental connection.

Physical Connection- On the same note as the mental connection is physical connection. If you are not physically attracted to someone, you will probably not even kiss them in the first place but if you do then it probably won’t be your best work. You should learn kissing secrets not have to keep the troll you kissed a secret.

Dynamics- The best kisser ever will have excellent dynamics. This will be explained more later but mainly you want to have good fundamentals.

Now on to the

kissing tricks!

The title of this is actually pretty misleading there is nothing really “tricky” about any of this.

The first key concept when making out is to maintain physical contact. Though this could be before or during kissing you want to build a level of comfort and be willing to touch each other. This doesn’t mean you are groping each other, though in some cases it might, but it mainly means that you should constantly be expressing your affection for the other person. Some ways to do this would be a hand placed on the hip, caressing, running your fingers through their hair, a massage, scratching (without hurting them) their back or whatever else you want to do that physically engages them.

Secondly after you initially start touching them you need to establish a deeper connection. This usually gets a bad reputation in movies as a guy saying some cheesy line but it is important. You can do this by a comment about how attractive they are, by using eye contact, or even by touching as described above.

Now is the time for the kissing magic. The way to be the best is to first start slow. Do not put your tongue all over their face, do not jam it in their mouth, and do not stick it in and out like you are a lizard (I’ve heard stories of even worse). Just pucker your lips a bit and lay a smooch on them, be gentle and hold it for a second. Too quick and it will seem meaningless, too long and it will be overdoing it. This will also establish more comfort for the future kisses to get a little steamier.

Tongue? What should I do with it? How much should I use? How far should I stick it out? This actually doesn’t have a right answer. That’s why adaptability is so important. The best kissing trick is just to figure out what they like and use that as a kissing guide. Some people like a lot of tongue. Some person may like it when you spin your tongue with hurricane force, others may be turned off when you barely use it at all. You just have to adapt to your partner. The general rule is to start slow and see what they respond too. You should usually start with just gentle rubbing your tongue along their bottom lip while kissing or gently make contact with the tip of their tongue.

*Note I know I am going into a ton of detail but I am assuming the person reading this could be a beginner and not only that but I would rather go into too much detail than not enough so you can actually learn something!*

From here you can escalate it and see if they respond usually spinning your tongue in circles around/ massaging theirs or just sporadic motion is done. This is the point when you can also start pulling out the tricks in your smooching magic bag. You could suck on their bottom lip gently or suck and then do a really gentle nibble on it. If they are using their tongue a lot you could create a vacuum around their tongue and bite down really gently (so you don’t hurt them) or use your tongue to touch theirs while you create the suction. You could pull up and give them a quick kiss on the tip of the nose, eskimo kiss them, kiss them on the cheek, rapid fire kiss them, or do basically anything I talked about in my previous Kissing Tricks Article.

Once you start kissing heavily you may want to start kissing other areas like the collar bone, neck, or even ear lobe. Remember to keep your hands moving as discussed in step 1! When kissing the neck you definitely want to create at least a little suction, I am not saying give them a hickey but a little is good and you probably will want to do little nibbles (again don’t hurt them) as you go.

If you repeat these steps over and over and continue communication throughout with the person you will soon find yourself as the best kisser ever!

If you liked this article please subscribe to our RSS, or to Email Updates. Also share it with your friends or others using the Share This button below.

Share This