date kate

i know...it's been a while...

2010-02-23T20:53:00.004-05:00

...And soooo much has happened!
After truly giving up on the whole dating scene and running my head into a brick wall at every turn, love happened.
No, really...it did.
Yeah, I know. Cliched, right? Like, there is NO WAY this actually happens to real people, especially people like me! But, I am here to say it does in the most unexpected, oddest, strangest and hilarious ways.
In may case, it goes a bit like this...
I work with a friend who dates a girl who has a brother who briefly meets me over a holiday weekend. He then contacts me via his sister's Facebook IM to carry on a month or so long convo that FINALLY turns into an actual face-to-face 'meeting' (a.k.a. date, but we don't want to call it a date) and end up talking until 3:30 in the morning and I have to wake up 2-1/2 hours later for work the next morning...yeah, let that swirl around in your mouth for a bit and digest it.
It has literally been a crazy whirlwind ever since that night (Oct. 22nd, 2009 to be exact)...So, let me breathe, gather my thoughts and share with you some crazy happenings that have occurred since then and what will surely come in the coming months.
Many more blogs to come.

dating sabbatical

2009-07-09T17:45:00.003-04:00

So, I had been dating the Shark for four weeks and things were moving along wonderfully...I was actually thinking, "Huh...I may have actually found a good one!"
But, that all changed after the 4th of July weekend.
You see, he has a knack for making plans, calling when he says he will, telling me how he feels - so, when we were on our last date little did I know it was our last forever.
From the moment he saw me, he stood up, gave me a kiss and bought me a drink as I relaxed from a crazy day at work. He was being the perfect gentleman, sexy as hell and listened to all I said with interest and care. We laughed our entire way through dinner and drinks and then he said he didn't want the date to end and wanted me to come home with him...So, I decided to take him up on his offer.
We spent the night together and the next morning I just snuck out and left him a note about having a fun time and looking forward to our next date that he was already planning the night before...Which he said he wanted to see me over the weekend one way or another.
I usually get the morning text from him, when I didn't get one, I texted him around noontime on Friday. He just texted back saying he missed me and would talk to me when he got out of work...Friday came and went - nothing. Saturday - still nothing, so I texted him in the afternoon saying, "Happy 4th of July! Hope you're having fun!"...still nothing, which was even weirder based on his past actions. Sunday - nothing. Monday - nothing.
So, I finally emailed him - refusing to call - and said I hoped he was fine and if he didn't want to see me anymore that's fine, but just let me know if he was still alive.
FINALLY, on Tuesday evening I heard back and apparently "family shit" came up and he needed time "alone to think about things" and "can't get close to anyone right now". Let's just say, I didn't buy it - I don't buy it and he's out of my life.
That being said, I'm on a dating sabbatical. I can't take another heartbreak. I can't put forth the effort. I can't try anymore. It's too much and right now I'm enjoying my time with my girls and focusing on work...at least I have that going for me.

Craziness

2009-06-22T17:58:00.003-04:00

So, I never, and I mean NEVER, get uber excited for a date, let alone a blind date with guys I meet on dating websites...cuz let's just say, my experience with them is less than stellar and all the guys on them seem to be pathetic, lonely and clingy.
I mean, I know of a couple success stories, but I have had yet to believe in the myths told to me on occasion. Up until now, I have been on these sites strictly for a couple dating experiences, maybe a good makeout session and definitely a fabulous story (usually at my own expense). It has never amounted to much - let alone worth more than a 2nd or 3rd date...But, now I may have to truly suck it up and realize it brought me along to a fabulous man.
He's the Shark, an attorney, and he is magnificent in every way of the word...OK, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself - because it has only been ONE date...But, I can not stop thinking, talking, daydreaming of him. It seriously is a problem and is starting to interrupt my productivity at work (Well, who am I fooling? I don't really apply myself there anyway lately because it's less than fulfilling. Thoughts of the Shark just make the day move a little faster.).
He is unbelievably sexy - strong hands (you know what I'm talking about), gorgeous eyes you could swim in, hair that just asks to be grabbed, a physique that I'm sure can prove itself in more ways than one, brains that actually challenge me, opinions that make me think and a sincerity and honesty that is rarely found anymore these days. UGH!!
This is not me, this is not how I act...I need to simmer down and see what happens - but let's just say, for now...I'm in this lovely state of euphoria that I just want to hold onto for a little longer before the "real" Shark emerges.

Letting Go and Moving On...

2009-06-11T15:16:00.007-04:00

How do you let go?
It's not a fun thing to do, especially when the person involved hasn't really done anything "wrong"...he just won't step up to the plate.
After giving Smoking Jacket one too many times to make it right, I have been finding ways to let myself let him go and how to let him down gently. It won't be pretty. It won't be easy. I still care for him, as he does me...but if it's not going to go anywhere, why should I stay? Purely for the physical connection, the chemistry, the sexual tension? That would have been enough six months ago, but now I'm seeing other opportunities pass me by and he's given me no reason to hold out any longer.
So, I have begun the "process," as I like to call it.
I threw out the ultimatum (if I can just keep my word), "Commit to me. Not marriage, but a commitment beyond 'dating'" In response, I got an "I love you." I don't believe that answers the question and now it is "go" time.
I am seeking out new opportunities, greener pastures and brighter horizons...I'm moving on and there is a date in my near future with a very fine gentleman that I will refer to as "Spartan."
More to come..."

Dad & the Date

2009-05-03T15:27:00.004-04:00

So the last few days have been somewhat interesting...My father flew into town solely to help me move into my new place - let's just say for the record, "Dads are amazing!".
But, I was a bit nervous about him meeting Smoking Jacket and, quite frankly, even more nervous to see how Smoking Jacket would be around my Dad.
Needless to say, as soon as they met it was like they knew each other for quite some time. They had no problem talking, asking each other questions, telling stories - mostly which involved me, and drinking beers together.
I had to leave early this morning for the airport (much earlier flight than my father's return flight), so Smoking Jacket agreed to drive my Dad to the airport later by himself. After interrogating both parties later today, it seems the little jaunt to the airport was just fine without me. I just hope not too much fun. I don't want 20 questions from Dad after this and I don't want Smoking Jacket to like my Dad more than me. (There's a fine line, just in case you were wondering or think I'm crazy.)
My conclusion is this: It's funny how a guy you date on and off can get along much better with your father from the get-go than a man you were married to for several years. It was great. Maybe I am not as worried to please the 'rents anymore or maybe my Dad just likes seeing me smile after everything that has happened in the last couple years. Either way, we all had a great time and drank too much wine and beer over a 4 day period.

The toothbrush...

2009-04-25T17:43:00.002-04:00

So, the Smoking Jacket has been trying his damnedest to make it right. But, he still couldn't wrap his pretty, little head around "what it is" that would make me happy.
So I told him...It's pretty simple as far as I'm concerned.
My list is short and sweet: someone to hold and be held, kiss and be kissed, listen and listen to, support but challenge and be there when the world feels like it's caving in from all sides.
Ok, the list may not be "simple" but it's definitely short and sweet.
So, without being asked or having to pout (yes, sometimes I will still pull the "pout". Immature? Maybe. Does it work? More often than not.), he has started to just kiss me out of the blue, hold my hand, play with my hair. Gotta admit...I wasn't sure I wanted all this even after I asked for it - but damn, it really feels good.
Well, the show is on and whether it is an epic tale or a documentary short film, he "left" his toothbrush at my place a few days ago and hasn't taken it back. It's his "statement", his "mark on his territory", his "attempt at trying". Whatever it is, I think he may be around for a little while longer than we all anticipated. *sigh*
And let's just say, I'm not kicking him out of bed for leaving crumbs (or toothbrushes) behind. At least not this week.

why date kate?

2009-04-23T18:55:00.000-04:00

So, over the course of several years and many friends' suggestions, I have been asked to write a story about my life.
Not sure why mine is so much more unique than the next girl's, but I do have many stories to tell. Many funny, some sad and too many that could only happen to me.
I have decided to focus most of my tales on my dating experiences...because as my friends can tell you, my dating stories are truly experiences that can not be made up or imagined. This stuff really happens and it happens to ME!
So, here we go...The journey has begun and you are in for the ride of your life - ok, maybe not your life, but at least a fun detour for the time being.