We are go for chai milkshake.

Highly recommended.

My thing with iced chai is that it seems half-assed. Iced tea is one thing, but iced chai and iced coffee seem weird to me. Piping hot coffee. Piping cold coffee. Which doesn’t belong?

But a chai milkshake is committing to your deviance and embracing your weirdness, you freaky caffeine-seeker. It’s the same reason that I have to respect a certain friend of mine who, when ordering a girly drink, demands a little umbrella for the glass. Commit. Embrace. Freak.

A quick SAT-style analogy:

Iced chai:chai milkshake::McLovin from “Superbad”:Bill from “Freaks and Geeks.”

Be real. Be Bill.

In search of a coffee shop not subject to the comings and goings of CU students — did I mention that my temporary living situation is a combination of awesome and slightly inconvenient? — I’ve wandered down to The Cup, where there is a 1:1 MacBook-to-customer ratio and where the menu includes chai and espresso milkshakes.

I am successfully consuming a 3rd Street Chai shake.

Now, pardon me while I step into the “cell phone booth,” a free-standing, wooden phone booth structure with a door. Why don’t more places have these?

By the way, I’m not going in there to make a call. I’m going in there to await instructions from George Carlin.

This week in Friday Magazine, we’ve listed all of the places you can watch fireworks in Boulder County and some of the ancillary events. For example, I plan on attending Boulder’s “Sesquicentennial Stroll,” a celebration of the city’s 150th birthday in conjunction with a celebration of all that is red, white and blue.

But last night I found what I am absolutely sure is the best 3rd and 5th of July location in Colorado, and may well be the best 4th spot, too:

Red Rocks.

RC and I went last night to see Wilco — a belated birthday gift for her. As Okkervil River played its opening set, we could see the jaw-dropping backdrop that you expect at Red Rocks: the light green landscape of Denver, the cluster of upward-thrust buildings downtown and other community centers dotting the view.

But as night fell and Wilco came on, Denver area revelers began celebrating the Fourth the best way they know how: by blowing things up. Occasionally in sync with stage movements, fireworks displays across the metro area were easily visible behind the performance. First, something apparantly due east, then something to the south, and several more between. Eventually, they were joined by fireworks downtown, presumably from Coors Field.

To top it off, farther up in the sky, we were treated to a long cloud-to-cloud lightning storm.

That’s three light shows and two alt-country/rock sets.

The A/V guys at Red Rocks really have things figured out.

I challenge you to find a better 4th spot in Colorado. Tonight at Red Rocks, Blues Traveler performs, which I can do without, but the opening set is Black Joe Lewis and the Honeybears.

Those Darlins – Red Light Love
Those Darlins – Wild One

What’s going to happen right after work? Like right after work? Well, I’m going to get on my bike, cruise over to my local record shop and pick up the Those Darlins album, that’s what.

T-minus whenever I finish all this stuff. In the meantime, it’s “Red Light Love” and “Wild One” for me.

Recommended beer pairing: Blue Paddle if in Colorado, Kelso pilsner if in New York.

I’ve been without cable or Internet for nearly a week now, so please leave any crucial Internet memes or television moments in the comments.

I feel a little weird about this show in which I am asked to watch people drink beer that is down the road from me. Though I do love that they get into Stranahan’s, Colorado’s first whiskey distillery. Sit back with a brew of your own, if you like, and watch:

Two recommended Denver trips for Boulder music lovers in July (follow me on Twitter and I’ll remind you when we’re closer):

On my very last night in Brooklyn, at a Via Audio show, I found out that one band on the bill and another closely related band were headed for D-town. Mark your calendars and iron your bus tickets.

Listen ‘n’ read:
Ha Ha Tonka – St. Nick on the Fourth in a Fervor
Ha Ha Tonka – Walking on the Devil’s Backbone
Elizabeth and the Catapult – Taller Children

Ha Ha Tonka announced themselves as hailing from the Ozarks, half-apologetically at a Brooklyn show bookended by two Brooklyn bands. When I talked to Jess Martins of Via Audio, she described them as having sort of a bluegrassy feel and told me they’d wow me with a couple of a cappella moments. True on both counts, and I’d add that if you liked the first Kings of Leon album, but wanted it to have a slightly more authentic southern feel–and this is coming from a guy who really liked that album–you’re going to love Ha Ha Tonka. But don’t be thrown off by all of the southern talk, because your average rock fan will love this band, too. Their new album, Novel Sounds from the Nouveau South, is an $8 download at Amazon.

Better yet, they’ll be at the Hi-Dive on Monday, July 27, and they want you there. (They told me.)

And the very next night–Tuesday, July 28–at the Walnut Room, you can catch another awesome band whose first EP I’ve been listening to ever since it came out. Elizabeth and the Catapult have really sweet, toe-tapping sounds and midnight smoke-filled bar moody tracks that make you wish you knew more about classy-sounding drinks. See above for the former and below for the latter:

You can’t tell me you don’t want to check that out while sipping an old fashioned. You can’t. Their new album is a $7 download at Amazon: Elizabeth and the Catapult – Taller Children.

Fifteen seconds of television that I wish went somewhere more interesting:

In my version, Billy Mays becomes incensed about the Sham-Wow ripping off the ‘Sorb-ease and points into the camera to specifically call out the Sham-Wow guy, making up silly names like Sham-Pow and Crap-Chop, then threatens physical violence toward Vince, the Sham-Wow/SlapChop guy.

OH WAIT, that happened on the radio:

It’s like the WWE! But worse! Or better? I don’t know anymore.

I ain’t the Beastie Boys Boys or Run DMC / I’m Billy Mays I’ll knock you down to your knees!

I spent the day cruising around Boulder in search of both long- and short-term living situations. Short-term is dealt with, but I had to write a big, fat check that I didn’t want to write. I’ll get it back, it’s just a screwball operation wherein I pay a full month’s deposit, plus one month of rent — for one month of residence. Then I get the deposit back.

The point is that I was considering a double-barreled Red Rocks weekend for the big-F Fourth (of July, that is). RC and I are headed to see Wilco on the little-T third, and it’s hard not to think about the show the next day, which I’d really be seeing for its opening act, Black Joe Lewis & the Honeybears. But that’s not looking good because… well… take it, Joe:

The good news is that I think we’re actually headed up to Laramie to get American, Wyoming style. Got plans for the Fourth? What’s your ideal Boulder Fourth of July?

Hey sports fans, I’m starving and eager to learn and try something new. I’ve had black bean burgers in restaurants (and at least one frozen one), but I’ve never made my own. Who’s got a good recipe? Leave recipes or links in the comments and I’ll try one out soon!

Inspiration from Grist’s Russ Walker tweeting about a modification to the climate bill.

::LINKS

@ashleybraun recommends these black bean burgers. “Carnivore-approved,” she says.

It’s been more than two years since I left Boulder for New York, but I’m coming back. I’m really excited to return to a city that is statistically the best (see chart). Now I need your help to reconnect!

Obviously the most important thing that happened, overall, in the last two years has been the explosion of Twitter. With that in mind, here are Twitter feeds that help me feel as though I know what’s going on in town:

1. @dailycamera – A reliable source of news and slideshows with naked bike riders.
2. @coloradodaily – News from a paper that increasingly reminds me of a place I used to work. Remember dirt?
3. @gwenbell – Always a good personal look at what’s going on around her, in social media, and she’s also a fun person to drag up to Oskar Blues.
4. @waylonlewis – Appeared on my radar when I worked, briefly, at Naropa University. Also, he made this list of Boulder people to follow on Twitter.
5. @teeandcakes – One half of this entrepreneurial duo is a dirt alum and the place itself is a great spot for snacks and cool design. Who wouldn’t be impressed by a football helmet cake?
6. @downtownboulder – Bikes, businesses and obsessing over parking spaces — it’s like I never left!
7. @programcouncil – When I lived in Boulder before, it was important to keep up with the rock shows they put on — some great stuff came through town, including the Roots! And they just got some pretty positive reactions from Daily Camera readers in the comments on this noise test story. (Disclosure: They also hired me to put on several shows in my previous career as a comedian.)

Now I need your help: who else should I be following? I have a bunch of the municipal Boulder Twitter accounts already, but I want to know the best individuals and entertainment venues in the whole county. I want to find people who know where the best places to hang out are, who put on the coolest and weirdest shows, who have the most impressive vegetable gardens, who know all of the local bands or hit every bluegrass pick.

Tell me who’s out there and say hello at @daveburdick.

So, as some of you know, I’m moving to Boulder, Colo. It’s happening next week. I’m very excited. More details in a while.

People have been missing me if I’ll miss New York. Sure, I’ll miss plenty of things about New York.

For example I won’t have access to the ample, sweaty rock shows. A quick retrospective of my favorite shows in my brief two-plus years here:

1. The Thermals at the Bowery Ballroom (The Thermals – Now We Can See)
2. The Black Keys at McCarren Park Pool (The Black Keys – Have Love, Will Travel)
3. Enon at Death By Audio (Enon – Sabina)
4. Rose Hill Drive (represent) at the Mercury Lounge

I’m girded, though, by the fact that the best show I think I’ve ever seen was put on by Gogol Bordello at the Fox Theatre in Boulder. Picture Eugene Hutz riding around on some concertgoer’s shoulders while singing something sort of like this:

(For fans of the band and the venue, he ended up standing on the rail in the middle of the room when the song ended. So there he was in silence for maybe half a second before he started with the next party song’s first lyric, “Dogs were barking,” and the place went bananas again.)

Time to study the local venue calendars! And if I actually get any Boulder readers today, what are the best shows you’ve seen in Boulder in the last few years?

I’m also excited that I’ll get to sneak one last show, right before I go: Via Audio – Modern Day Saint at the Bell House!