Dave's ImPatient Life

Bonus addition to Granite State of Mind

2010-04-10T22:34:00.008-04:00

Today on the radio I heard a smackdown improv addition to something that's been setting YouTube on fire, with a million views this week: Granite State of Mind. The guy was asked to rhyme "Winnepesaukee" on the spot, and he aced it. :-)

Read on.

A huge YouTube success has been hip-hop artist Jay-Z's homage to his home town, Empire State of Mind, featuring Alicia Keys, with 36 million views. (See it here.)

A hugely successful parody hit YouTube ten days ago: "Granite State of Mind" by SSP (Super Secret Project). It already has almost a million views:

(Interestingly, in the parody the lyrics sync much better with the rhythm than they do on Jay-Z's original.)

Today on WBUR's "Radio Boston" Karen Pelland ran a great interview with SSP about what a hoot this is. (Audio here. To hear this segment you can move the slider to 41:45.) At 47:50 she wraps up with one last thought:

"Even though you got a TON of both obscure and well-known New Hampshire references [into the song], there's a couple that I thought, 'I would have liked to have heard them.' So... I'm gonna throw down this challenge. Could you craft a rhyme right now that gets in the greatest of the lakes, Lake Winnipesaukee?"

In seconds he said "All right... here we go" and came back with this:

Catch me at the Whittemore
for Wildcats Hockey
but wishin I was fishin on
Winnepesaukee

Awesome. Great work, SSP.

Take THAT, Penn and Teller

2010-03-24T13:51:00.006-04:00

Okay, I don't speak Chinese, but I don't think that's necessary...

As the old magician's wisecrack goes, "Notice how my fingers never leave my hand."

(Email subscribers: if you can't see the video above, click here to view it online.)

"Graceful consort!" from Haydn's The Creation

2010-01-15T19:23:00.003-05:00

My good friend Lucy Jo Palladino wrote Find Your Focus Zone, a great book that combines old and new research into advice on finding just the right level of background stimulation so that your particular mind can comfortably accomplish things. She's wonderful, and the book's wonderful: it works.

I seem to like Bach, and while scrounging on YouTube I ran across this, which isn't Bach. It's just lovely; I keep playing it over and over in my new noise-cancelling earphones, as I work. Enjoy.

John Lennon tells royals to "Rattle your jewelry"

2009-12-28T16:16:00.004-05:00

Ah, holiday weeks: we discover all kinds of things we'd otherwise never find.

Twitter user @TheBeatlesVideo links to a blog where they post all kinds of Beatles related videos. Some have lyrics on top of the song, some are others playing Beatles on guitar.

But some are little-known videos of real performances. I love this one. Aren't they just having FUN playing for the queen?

From November 4, 1963:

(If you can't see the video, click here.)

"Cop Fail"

2009-11-15T07:42:00.000-05:00

I am *so* glad I have a separate blog for things like this. (Email subscribers, click the headline above to come view it online. 57 seconds you won't want to miss.)

Thanks to the world-famous Fail Blog for bringing this to our attention.

I mean, how many news stories make the off-camera announcer snicker to the point of snorting?

The Cactus Cuties sing the national anthem

2009-11-14T10:26:00.004-05:00

Wonderful, moving rendition. What precision! Great arrangement, well directed and beautifully executed by these cuties. Thanks to Uncle Sandy for this:

This must have been done some years ago, because here there are five (now four) and they're a lot younger here than on their site.

They seem more "produced" now, which is just not as impressive or, well, cutel. :-) Anyway, I love this, so enjoy.

O Sole Mio

2009-10-03T17:17:00.004-04:00

Thanks to good friend Jere for this link, sent months ago.... I just found it, undiscovered, in the email. As she said, "If you haven't already seen these guys, brace yourselves."

Even if you can't read Italian, you'll understand their ages when they're shown...

I solved the Canadian airline terror crisis

2009-09-19T16:27:00.000-04:00

I figured it out!

Today I returned from a medical conference in Canada, and at the airport I found that they don't make you take off your shoes when you go through security!!!!

No wonder they have constant suicide bombings!! Why can't Canada just be more like Americans??

Those silly northerners.

Well, that's my good deed for the day. Time for a bike ride.

Excerpts from pet diaries

2009-09-08T19:48:00.002-04:00

Another from Uncle Sandy, who clearly has plenty of time on his hands but is too lazy to use the free authoring login I gave him on this blog:

This may be old enough to have long gray hairs, but it still speaks abundant truth.

Excerpt from a Dog's Diary........

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
__________________________________________

Excerpt from a Cat's Diary...

Day 983 of my captivity....

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. >

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now

Innovative response to having one's car booted

2009-08-27T01:48:00.004-04:00

I've seen plenty of cars with a Denver Boot on them, but I've never "earned" the privilege of wearing one. Apparently in this case the woman disputed the charges...

Thanks to Uncle Sandy...

Hot diggety, Suede returns to New England! October 11

2009-08-11T23:52:00.004-04:00

Oh my goodness, what NEWS! Get out your calendars and lubricate your wallets! For the first time in 14 months, on Sunday October 11 my jazz-blues singer sister the fabulous diva Suede (www.SuedeWave.com) will play in New England!

It's her favorite New England venue, the wonderful Jonathan's in Ogunquit, Maine. Those who've been there know how good the food is, and the small-but-not-too-small club upstairs makes it easy to enjoy The Diva's magnificent voice and stirring performances.

This is not a cheap evening, it's an evening that's WORTH IT. And so are you. It's a big deal HOLIDAY weekend, and the food is great. Plan to stay over at one of the nearby motels (Ogunquit is a big-deal beach town) so you don't have to drive home. We'll close the place down, as we've done many times in the past.

Terrific Apollo 11 photos

2009-07-19T21:05:00.005-04:00

The Boston Globe's site Boston.com has a terrific series of 40 photos about the Apollo moon landing 40 years ago. Most are pictures I've never seen. I encourage you to go look.

Amidst all the world's cynicism and uproar today, this story continues to inspire, and for good reason.

My favorite pair: Neil Armstrong before the launch...

...and after he'd walked on the moon:

I know these astronauts were all "Right Stuff" military test pilots, but I knew an awful lot of hippies who had exactly that same grin on their faces in 1969, for very different reasons. :-)

Call me a fool, but humanity continues to inspire me. That was forty years ago, people. Think what more we will achieve.

Dick Cheney is an effing idiot

2009-06-04T21:09:00.003-04:00

Dick Cheney actually had the stones to assert recently that Richard Clark "missed" the approach of 9/11. Yes, the Richard Clark who warned Condi Rice about Al Qaeda 5 days after the Bush inauguration, and warned again with a memo on 9/4/01. Cheney says he doesn't remember any of it.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

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Dick (Uncut)

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Nudity optional

2009-05-25T09:30:00.002-04:00

Imagine my surprise to discover there's a nudist club in Cincinnati, a park called Paradise Gardens (www.nudelife.com). No, there aren't any nude photos, but the activity schedule includes several dances that sound like they think it's more fun to wear clothes:

Toga Dance

Toilet Paper Lingerie Dance

Costume Contest

Pajama Dance

~ Rhonda

Circus goat walking on a wire

2009-05-24T19:06:00.001-04:00

From Uncle Sandy. Gives a whole new meaning to "sure-footed." (The video, not him.)

Heartening word piece

2009-05-10T19:28:00.002-04:00

This has 5 million plays on YouTube, and chances are you're one of 'em. Whether you are or not, I hope you'll enjoy. Nicely done.

Remix of Alice

2009-05-10T12:01:00.002-04:00

Okay, children of the Sixties, this is it. Repeat after me: "TOO freaking MUTSCH!"

Seriously.

(Thanks to the odd design site Booooooom.)

CBS News: Kittens For Lunch

2009-05-08T20:12:00.004-04:00

In case you haven't seen it yet, here's a perfect Mother's Day message.

VocaPeople

2009-04-25T10:14:00.001-04:00

This is making the rounds of perpetually forwarded emails. I don't think it's as stunning as some folks say (the emails say "NO INSTRUMENTS! JUST HUMAN VOICES!", but it's fun.

Somebody has WAY too much time on their hands.

2009-04-23T22:29:00.000-04:00

MIT geeks create a virus that makes a battery

2009-04-07T23:27:00.004-04:00

Not kidding. From EcoGeek.org:

Those crazy lab rats at MIT are attempting to radically diminish the cost of producing sophisticated nanotech cathodes and anodes by enlisting viruses to do the hard work for them. ...

The team at MIT genetically engineered viruses to excrete certain proteins. Those proteins then react with chemicals introduced to the environment to create complicated structures. Proteins are very good at directing compounds to create complicated structures...like life forms.

The viruses, in effect, pull the needed compounds (gold and cobalt for the anode and iron phosphate and carbon for the cathode) into nanowires....

Unless EcoGeek is twisting the truth (how would I know?), this sounds closer to reality than one might think. Go read the post, if you wish.

We've all wanted to do this.

2009-04-04T08:04:00.003-04:00

(Click to enlarge)

Well yes, that would explain it.

2009-03-25T20:50:00.008-04:00

When we remember we are all mad,
the mysteries disappear
and life stands explained.
– Mark Twain

Portia DiRossi apologizes for getting married and the suffering it's caused people

2009-03-23T07:00:00.002-04:00

Thanks to @TheEllenShow on Twitter!

How to tell if your cat is trying to kill you (from Cats Who Twitter)

2009-03-22T09:53:00.002-04:00

People who are aware of cat behavior, you have a new concern. Beware.

Acting on a lead from amazing medical tweet @JenMcCabeGorman, an investigative reporter (me) looked into the Cats Who Twitter blog, found the list (brazenly published!) of participants, and unearthed the Twitter user @3CatBlog. And there it was:

How to tell if your cat is plotting to kill you