David Scrimshaw's Blog

Is Magi Dead? Episode 7

2016-03-06T13:45:00.000-05:00

This episode is dedicated to Manon who cannot be here to watch Magi today.

Skates on a plane

2016-02-16T20:07:00.001-05:00

Thursday last week, I was at Billy Bishop Airport in Toronto to fly home on Porter. There was a long line to get to the security check. So long, that the guy in front of me in the line looked at me and said, "this is a long line." We strangers in the airport line rarely talk to each other. Maybe because we're alert to the possibility that we all might be terrorists.

I agreed. "The longest line I've ever seen here." We were in the Nexus/Premium Access line, so no need to mention that we both had plenty of experience with the airport lines.

Then he rifled through his bag. "I forgot my boarding pass." He ducked out of the line and went under the cordon ribbon thing, causing it to come undone. He started to reattach it, but I took it from him.

"I'll deal with this, you get your boarding pass." I reattached the cordon.

While he was gone, two different people came along looking frantic waving their boarding passes and saying something about boarding in five minutes. I thought about saying something like, we all planned our travel to get here in lots of time, but I didn't. I just said, "go ahead."

Then the guy came back. He looked a little sheepish about getting back in front of me, but I told him it was fine. Perhaps this made him feel like confessing something. He lifted his carry-on bag. "I've got a pair of skates in here."

My eyes went wide. "A pair of skates?"

"Yeah," he said, "they told me at the counter they would be fine."

"A pair of skates is fine and we can't bring a little 2-inch pocket knife on?" (I'm still bitter about losing the little Swiss Army knife that I forgot to take out of my pocket a couple of years ago.)

"I guess it's hard to threaten someone with a skate," he said.

This seemed dubious to me, but I said, "okay, I think they should let it all on anyway. I wish you luck."

He went in the line for one x-ray machine and I went in the line for the other. A few minutes later I was heading into the snack area to get my free decaf cappuccino and packet of cookies when I ran into him.

"You'll never guess what happened," he said.

"Your skates?"

"They let them through!"

"They did? That's great."

"Yes, but I didn't know that my wife put a wine opener in my bag."

"Oh, no," I said, "they didn't like the cork screw?"

"Not the corkscrew, the little blade for taking off the plastic wrap at the top of the bottle."

"Oh, no," I said.

"Yes, I lost the wine opener."

I'm hoping that if he was skating in Ottawa this past cold weekend, he found a good bottle of screw-top wine for afterwards.

2016-01-18T07:21:00.001-05:00

and now, the rest of the story...

Is Magi Dead? Episode 6

2016-01-16T11:48:00.001-05:00

Magi doesn't hang out on the floor so much any more. Maybe it's the thyroid drugs she's on. Maybe it's the loaded hamper in the bedroom.

A one-panel comic

2016-01-04T13:32:00.000-05:00

Things I learned from drawing this comic and posting it:

You should write your words before you draw the thing you're going to put them in. (I knew this, but forgot it.)
If I do something that isn't right and decide I'll re-do it, I probably won't get around to re-doing it. (I drew this about a month ago.)
A one-panel comic is actually just called a "panel".
That psychology thing where you take longer to say the colour of a word when the word names a different colour (like yellow, red, green or blue) is called the Stroop Effect.

Santa says Happy New Year

2015-12-31T21:06:00.000-05:00

It looks like Santa Claus has retired the reindeer, bought a minivan and is hanging out in Ottawa. At least for New Year's.

I found a dinosaur

2015-12-28T12:00:00.000-05:00

A Disconcerting Value Village Experience

2015-12-27T18:19:00.000-05:00

I should have reported this before Christmas because you might have wanted to know that the Value Village on Bank Street had a copy of the Maple Leaf Brass Band's A Merry Brass Christmas on the used CD shelf. At least they did two nights before Christmas.

It was the first time I've gone shopping and found a used CD that I performed on.

I almost bought it, but not only have I already got a copy, I'm pretty sure I have a spare copy and my number one brass band fan has a copy in her car.

So I left it on the counter but out on display so that it might catch the eye of someone who needs more Christmas music in their life.

Ducks under water

2015-12-13T18:02:00.001-05:00

If you're wondering why I put these ducks in the water globe with the Christmas cactus cutting...

It is because I could not find the dinosaurs.

Monsters in Little Italy

2015-11-22T15:27:00.001-05:00

I wonder what will happen to these diggers at Preston and Carling when the 45-storey condo is built. Will they just be buried underneath like the diggers of London? Or converted into furnaces like Mike Mulligan's steam shovel?

Lending the chainsaw

2015-10-20T09:00:00.000-04:00

A few weeks ago, my coworker Lori mentioned her husband had some wood to cut, but didn't have a chainsaw. I quickly offered to let him borrow my mine. I use the chainsaw to cut up the firewood I scrounge in the neighbourhood, but could easily spare the saw for a few weeks and I'm always happy to help out another modern lumberjack.

So, I put the chainsaw in my car and drove it in to work. It's a light chainsaw, so I could have brought it into the building to give to Lori, but we figured it would be better to do the transfer in the parking lot. We had a feeling that it would make the front desk security guards uncomfortable to have someone walk past them with a chainsaw. Like there probably isn't a specific rule against chainsaws in the building, but they'd feel they should do something about it.

I mentioned that the blade could be lubricated. "They have dedicated chainsaw oil, but I just use a heavy motor oil or bicycle chain oil, whatever's around," I told her.

Gord had the chainsaw for a couple of weeks and then he returned it. I don't know much about Gord, but I can tell you he is the kind of guy who returns things in better shape than he borrows them.

Here is the returned chainsaw.

Notice the wood attached to the blade? With nice heavy screw knobs? He made a guard for the blade! Cut a piece of wood to a perfect shape, drilled some holes and attached those really nice knobs. And, he threw in a jug of proper chainsaw oil!

I'm trying to think of what else I can lend Gord.

Feeding the Chickadees

2015-10-19T12:06:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, Manon and I met my dad at the Upper Canada Migratory Bird Sanctuary down near Morrisburg. We arrived in time for the 2:30 p.m. feeding of the Canada Geese. It is fun to see thousands of geese feeding at the same time. The feedings continue until the end of October, so you can still go.

But the really cool thing was when we took a walk on the boardwalk trail through the wetlands.

We were swarmed by little black-capped chickadees. It's like they knew that Manon and I had supported them in the campaign to name them Ottawa's unofficial bird.

It seems people are allowed to feed the birds. (There are no signs saying you can't and nothing about it on the website.) We passed several groups of people offering bird seed to the chickadees.

Then we came to a group that was offering black sunflower seeds. And a man with them offered us seeds so we could try it.

These tiny little birds were landing right on our hands and taking the seeds. The birds are so light you can barely feel them.

The very kind man with the seeds explained that he thinks the black sunflower seeds work particularly well because they contrasts well with skin colour and the birds can see them better.

His friend was also able to tell us that the other birds with a blueish colour that that were around but a bit more shy than the chickadees were nuthatches.

A Planter Mystery

2015-09-04T14:00:00.000-04:00

Can you explain why I'm encouraged to save coffee cans for planters, but I've been expressly asked not to save pop bottles?

Look at these beauties:

A Solair Mystery

2015-09-03T20:55:00.000-04:00

Can you guess where we bought our new Solair Chair?

Is Magi Dead? Episode 5

2015-06-07T15:19:00.000-04:00

Magi shows her versatility as an actor.

You might be right to ignore my advice

2015-05-24T19:17:00.002-04:00

We had a successful time at the Great Glebe Garage Sale yesterday and I learned an important lesson.

At the very last sale we stopped at, Manon spotted an odd glass dish. "Do you know what this is for?"

It had a spindle sort of thing in the middle. I asked, "is it for a Bundt cake?"

"No," she said, "the sides aren't high enough and there's a pouring spout."

"Well," I said, "if you don't know what it is, you don't need it."

That was enough for me, but Manon is more curious and she had to know. So she asked another customer who made the same guess I made and then Manon asked the adorable 90-year-old Ukrainian woman running the sale.

The owner explained that the item was for roasting a chicken in the oven. You put the chicken upright over the spindle and pour out the juice to make your gravy.

She accepted a very reasonable price that I cannot share with you because her daughter who originally paid for it might come across this and we can't let the daughter know what it went for.

The lesson learned: People may do well by ignoring my advice. And if they do, I might get some roast chicken out of it.

Great Glebe Garage Sale on Saturday

2015-05-21T17:23:00.001-04:00

It turns out that my blog postings on the Great Glebe Garage Sale have put me so high in the Google rankings that a reporter actually phoned me today to get some quotes.

Haley Ritchie quoted me in The great guide to the great Glebe garage sale.

She did not use my favourite quote that I gave her: "If you don't know what it is, you don't need it." (This is what a seller thoughtfully told me several years ago and advice I've taken to heart.)

I also advised taking pictures of things that you like but know you shouldn't take home. Here is a picture of something I didn't buy last year.

Yes, now that I look at the picture, I kind of regret not buying it.

Say, the weather forecast for Saturday looks great. Wear sunscreen!

There's lots of great links in my 2013 post on the sale.

Is Magi Dead? Episode 4

2015-05-16T12:19:00.000-04:00

She continues to keep us in suspense.

Is Magi dead? Episode 3

2015-05-02T19:43:00.000-04:00

The series continues.

Is Magi Dead? Episode 2

2015-04-23T10:55:00.000-04:00

In case you were wondering, the producer of this series is not dead. And here is episode 2.

Dinosaur Drawer Pulls

2015-04-04T16:56:00.000-04:00

As you know, I'm always eager to make life better for others. When a lovely women of my intimate acquaintance mentioned that she was thinking about a new look for the handles on her dresser, I became eager to help her find something more aesthetically pleasing.

You can imagine my excitement when I found a do-it-yourself idea on Apartment Therapy. If you go there, you will find instructions on how to make drawer pulls from just about anything and they feature toy dinosaurs.

Toy dinosaurs in a variety of sizes are available at all the best dollar stores at affordable prices. But the Apartment Therapy instructions require work. I found that dinosaurs can go in the handles with no drilling, spray painting or added bolts.

It's been a week and they're still there. Although I've heard "they're not exactly ergonomic".

Is Magi Dead? Episode 1

2015-04-03T16:16:00.000-04:00

I am finally launching a video series that I've been meaning to get going for a long time. It features our feline friend Magi (pronounced like Maggie).

Appetizer Tip: Use the right platter

2015-02-17T17:26:00.000-05:00

Manon and I have become the royal couple of devilled eggs. Is it because we make the best devilled eggs? No it is not. First, it is not a competition. Second, all devilled eggs are delicious.

What make us the royal couple of devilled eggs is this amazing ceramic platter we found at the Kanata Value Village several weeks ago. It has a hen flanked by salt and pepper chicks and the hen has toothpick holes. We may try tiny pickled onions on the toothpicks next time.

We have brought the platter to two dinners now and are confident that it will dramatically increase the number of dinner invitations we receive.

Bonus tip: This youtube video that shows a supposedly great way for peeling boiled eggs did not work at all for me.

Double bonus tip: I cannot tell you where to find a devilled egg platter like ours, but it would be better if you didn't have one anyway. Instead you might want a platter that would be suitable for something else. Perhaps chicken wings and dipping sauce. This pair of bowls was at the Gatineau Village des Valeurs on Monday. It might still be there.

Uses for Binder Clips: Clothing Repairs

2015-02-16T16:54:00.003-05:00

The uses of binder clips as stylish fashion accessories has been well documented. They can also be used for emergency repair. I understand a respected provincial tribunal member made good use of these three clips in two formal proceedings last week when a hem needed repair. [Update: I am reliably informed that was actually a seam repair, not a hem repair.]

I would name the presiding member that used this repair and the tribunal involved but a duty of confidentiality has been imposed on me. This also precludes me from naming the kind photographer who provided the image.

[Just to be clear, you know that those aren't my trousers, because mine are not that nice.]

A Lucky Lunch in Chinatown

2015-02-08T18:07:00.001-05:00

There are worse things than being stuck in Ottawa when it's Chinese New Year's. If you're at the Ben Ben for it, you'll probably enjoy the spring rolls, and you may score a lucky envelope with a candy from your member of parliament in a purple jacket.

Manon loves a parade and she loves New Year's

That dragon can really demolish a cabbage!