dead man's travelog

I Saw Jesus Today - Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Fri, 28 May 2010 20:52:00 +0000

Sometimes you meet someone and you just know there's nothing there in terms of potential friendship material. Even when you meet someone who has a need and you help feel that need, sometimes you know it's a one-time encounter. Meeting Cathy was not one of those cases. During our initial conversation we had in my car, I felt like telling her she "had me" at "give to others." I like to surround myself with people that have that kind of heart to help, so in my view, I made a new friend. In fact, just before she got out of the car, she again mentioned she was going to try to pay me back. My response was, "All I want is your friendship."

I told my wife all about Cathy and we both wanted to do something more. Our initial plan was to get some sisters in the Lord together and take Cathy out for a "just because you are you" celebration, but nobody in our area responded. We do have support from a handful of non-local friends, and for that we are truly grateful. As far as the in-person contact though, Cindy and I are apparently on our own.

I called Cathy Tuesday and found out she was in the hospital for surgery(ies) on her leg. I talked to her for about half an hour. She told me they were removing several bone chips from under her kneecap and also sawing down the bones that were breaking through her skin. I am not clear whether she had already had one surgery at that point or not, but she told me that since I had prayed for her leg, it has felt better than it ever has since the accident. She also told me that all the hate, animosity and anger she had toward the family members (and others) who had abused her lifted off of her when I prayed, and I hadn't even specifically prayed for that. She said she didn't believe in my God and I told her she didn't have to to be my friend. I reiterated to her that I'm her friend because we have a common heart for helping others, and that's it. If she never goes to church, I'm still her friend. Then my wife talked to her for 45 minutes. Wow, my wife was amazing - loving yet bold. I was watching the boys while she talked in the basement, but I caught bits and pieces. Later Cindy told me that Cathy said she was an atheist, to which Cindy replied, "No, I know you're not, I believe you're tender toward God even if you don't want to admit it." Cathy replied that she had not been for years, but all that had changed when I prayed for her. She FELT God's presence and was touched that I was not afraid to put my hand directly on her skin graft (FYI, it was the lower leg, so neither her nor I considered that inappropriate). I had felt absolutely nothing when I prayed, but I know enough not to go by feelings. God is so far beyond what we feel or don't feel, and He is certainly not limited by the fact that we are imperfect vessels (trust me, if He uses me, He can use anyone). He is an awesome God!

Cindy and I tried to visit Cathy in the hospital on Wednesday but we had to turn back due to construction traffic (even without traffic it is an hour's drive one way). I called her yesterday because we wanted to try again, but she had already been released and was staying with a friend. This time when I spoke to her I could tell she was in a great deal of pain. Cindy and I are going to try to visit her Saturday afternoon and take her some food.

To those of you who DID contact me, you have no idea what it means to me. Yes, this woman has a past, but don't we all? And yes, she has some things going on in her present as well, but we are called to be ministers of reconciliation. There's something God wants to do. This was not a chance encounter. Thank you for reading this and for caring. I appreciate your time and your prayer support. More soon!

I Saw Jesus Today

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sun, 23 May 2010 03:15:00 +0000

Especially in a world of with Facebook and Twitter, it seems that Matthew 6:1-4 has been all but completely thrown to the wind. You know, it's the verse that says we shouldn't do good deeds to be seen by others, and that we should actually try to "not let the left hand know what the right is doing." There are things my wife and I have done (and regularly do) that nobody knows about except the recipient(s), and we like it that way. However, there are times when it is right to say something, and this is one of those exceptions. You'll see why soon.

Further in Matthew, chapter 25, we read that Jesus says, "In as much as you do it to the least of these, you do it to me." I met 'Jesus' today and he was in bad shape. My heart is very heavy because I don't know what the next move could/should be.

At 12:30 this afternoon I was heading home on Hwy 70 after playing golf for five hours. Someone paid my way to take part in a scramble and I joined for the fellowship. It was only the second time in my life that I've played golf. The first time was in high school PE so, given the fact that all of us were beginners, I wasn't that bad in comparison. Today I played with people who were definitely not beginners, and I stunk. After five hours I was hot, hungry, and a bit aggravated because I wished I could have done better and saved myself some embarrassment. I was looking forward to having lunch with my wife while her parents watched our kiddos.

As I was replaying the worst golf strokes in my mind I drove past a woman hitchhiking. It's not often you see a hitchhiker anymore, much less a woman. I immediately started praying protection over her so that wrong person would not pick her up. Then I heard the Holy Spirit say, "You pick her up." I used to do that all the time when I was single, but being married and a father, I want to use wisdom. I checked to make sure my spirit bore witness and yes, it was 100%. I turned around, headed back the other way, and then retraced my path to hopefully find her.

When I pulled up behind the woman I could see something was wrong with her legs. She wasn't just bowlegged, she was hobbling. I checked traffic, pulled out and then moved to where I was in front of her. She excitedly hobbled up as I reached over and opened the passenger door. She got in, tears in her eyes, and kept repeating, "Thank you, thank you, thank you." We finally got to introductions and I learned her name was Cathy. She immediately started telling me about how she gives to others without expecting anything in return. She apparently opens her little apartment to neighborhood kids and feeds them to the point that she has virtually nothing left for herself. She also takes in animals that shelters are going to put to sleep and feeds them at her own expense. She kept saying, "You're it! You're the way it's coming back to me." I told her I am happy to do it, glad I could help, and that I expect nothing in return. I then asked her about her legs and ended up finding out much more. Here's a quick summary:

1) Starting at 12 years old, she was raped on a regular basis by her real dad.
2) Her mom remarried and her step-dad was an alcoholic who beat her for years.
3) She is 54 and has two sons, 30 and 20. The 30 yr old is in jail.
4) Her husband committed suicide by hanging himself.
5) She ran an escort service in the 80's.
6) In her early 20's she was hit by a drunk driver. Both her legs were crushed and her pelvis shattered.
7) She is very poor and, although she didn't come right out and say this, I think she turns tricks to pay for her apartment and food.

She told me that she has several pins in her legs, but due to repeated falling, they have worked their way out and some have even pierced the skin. She showed me her lower leg and knee. Trust me, she's not lying. Her leg looks like it has been piecemealed together. She said she had walked four miles before I picked her up and had fallen twice. That was hard enough to hear. She then said, "I don't have a car so I have to get rides. 99.9 percent of the guys that pick me up give me $30 in exchange for a bl*wj*b." I was taken back by how blunt she was but counteracted quickly, "Well first of all, as a male, I'm embarrassed and saddened that there are people out there who treat you like that." She began to weep and exclaimed how degrading it was. I then told her that not only am I going to give her (amount) dollars, I don't want anything, nothing whatsoever, in return. Several times during the trip she broke down and sobbed. I spoke to her of God's compassion, unconditional love, and how much value she has in His eyes and mine. She gave me her number and insisted that I call her and let her pay me back after she gets her disability check in a couple weeks, but I told her I meant what I said about not wanting anything in return. I offered to drive her all the way to her door, but she wanted to be dropped off at QT. She apparently was going to call someone to take her grocery shopping. I offered to take her, but she was adamant that it would take too long. She let me pray for her, hugged me, and then hobbled over to the pay phone. I left and went home, but she has not left my thoughts.

I know I've posted the Keith Green song "Asleep in the Light" on this blog before, but I have to post a couple lines from it again.

'Cause He brings people to you door
And you turn them away
As you smile and say
"God bless you, be at peace"
And all heaven just weeps
'Cause Jesus came to you door
You've left him out on the streets

I can't help but think...Yes, I picked 'Jesus' up, but then I dropped him off at QT (I know that might sound funny, but I'm being completely serious). Could I have done more? Should I have done more? So, I have a thought. I'm looking for several people who would like to celebrate this woman's worth with me and my wife. I would like to arrange to pick her up (probably at QT), and I think it would be awesome if a small group took her out to eat as a way of telling her she's valuable. That would actually serve two purposes: First, she would know that people care about her and want to help. Secondly, those of you who went would see the kind of heart she has, as well as her leg situation. You'll see that nothing at all was embellished. To be perfectly honest, I am not sure how to best help, but this would be a start. As a group we could pray and brainstorm about what to do further.

If you have read this far, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. I'm hoping I have some friends who will take me up on this. Please email me via Facebook or the email address in my blog profile if you want to be a part of it. Thank you!

"From Eternity to Here" Blog Tour

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 04:08:00 +0000

This is completely new to me, but I volunteered to participate in a blog tour for a new book by Frank Viola called "From Eternity to Here." Those who follow this blog know that I was touched and challenged by "Crazy Love" (Francis Chan) earlier this year. I guess it was someone from the publisher that sent an email out about the blog tour, and I decided to sign up. We had our choice of presenting two questions to the author OR writing a review of the book. I decided to go the two-question route. Below is a list of the bloggers who participated and my questions with the author's answers...

Bloggers who participated:

Jay Becker - www.jaybecker.org

Mark D - http://deadmanstravelog.blogspot.com

Igniting Hearts - Kimber Britner - http://www.ignitinghearts.blogspot.com/

Karyn - http://tiger-kar.blogspot.com

Barefoot Preacher - http://thebarefootpreacher.blogspot.com

Every Day Angels - www.WeAreEverydayAngels.com

FaithEngineer - http://www.faithengineer.com

Kristen Schiffman - http://dancinginthemargins.typepad.com/

CrossPointe: The Church at Bevo - http://churchatbevo.blogspot.com/

Crazy Love for God - crazyloveforgod.blogspot.com

Amazima Ministries - oatsvallteam.blogspot.com

Down to Write Honest - http://downwritehonest.com

A Beautiful Mess - http://blnorth1105.blogspot.com/

The Blakes on a Mission - www.theblakesthailand.blogspot.com

Words by Jud Kossum - http://judkossum.blogspot.com

Eric Jaffe - http://www.ericjaffe.org

Reconnect with God – www.Reconnectwithgod.org

2nd Cup of Coffee - http://www.2nd-cup-of-coffee.blogspot.com

Nolan Bobbitt Website - www.nolanbobbitt.com

Klappyanne - www.xanga.com/klappyanne

Daveingland - http://www.daveingland.com

Randi Jo Rooks - http://seedsinmyheart.blogspot.com

Ephesians Five – http://ephesiansonefive.blogspot.com

Michael Bayne - http://www.michaelbayne.net

Encounter Church Helena Blog - encounterhelena.org

Thoughts B4 Conviction N2 Action - tsharrison.blogspot.com

Edevotion - http://www.e-devotion.blogspot.com

Seeking After - http://seekingafter.blogspot.com

Eric Powell - www.encounterhelena.org

Borrowed Light - http://fbcnewlondon.blogspot.com

Question One:
>>In the book you describe the Bride of Christ as being flawless (p. 49). There are Scriptures (i.e. 1 Peter 4:17) that speak of God judging/purging the church. Ephesians 5:25-27 says, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish." I have always heard it preached that the "without spot or wrinkle" description is something we should strive for, therefore implying that we are not there yet. Would you say that the "status" of the church is similar to our status as believers....that she ALREADY IS blameless (just as we are already righteous as a result of being saved) yet there are still human natures that cause her to corporately need God's correction (just as we as believers still struggle with sin)? That would seem to make sense to me...just wondered if you could expand.>>

Answer:
As I point out in the book, there's no such thing as "positional truth" and I give illustrations demonstrating this. In the eyes of God, the church IS without blame, pure, and holy because she's IN Christ. That's a reality; not a "positional" thing. At the same time, God is transforming individual believers in space/time to be conformed to the image of Jesus. He's transforming clay to precious stone to make up His habitation, His resting place. The latter, however, doesn't happen very well if we do not stand on the ground of the former ... which means to take God's view rather than our own. To put it another way, the Christian life is becoming what you already are.

Question Two:
>>The concept of acting "in Him, through Him, and with Him" has been presented much more often as something for us as individuals rather than the corporate Church / Bride of Christ. Do those "in Him, through Him, and with Him" Scriptures pertain to the Bride, to us as individuals, or both? >>

Answer:
Certainly both, however, the strong emphasis is on the body of Christ first. For instance: Every letter that Paul wrote with the exception of 4, were written to local communities whose members had a shared life and who Paul called "the body of Christ." Thus all the "you's" in those letters were plural. (If you are from the south, they should be translated "you'all." This corporate, collective dimension of our faith has been largely lost, since most Westerners read their Bibles with individualistic glasses. But God's intention is for a corporate expression of His Son.

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 8

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 12:15:00 +0000

Well obviously this post was a long time coming. Part of the delay was due to having much on my plate (helping a friend in need, attending to work-related issues, and helping my mom who was recently hospitalized), but I also think a big part of it was that I wanted to HAVE to revisit my experience. I guess the fear was that if I "finish" writing about my Ethiopia trip, it will drift farther and farther from my mind. Maybe the trip in general will, but finding a way to minister to people in need will not, regardless of where or who those people are.

Friday morning, as usual, I awoke at 5am and got up to spend time alone with God. The first thing I noticed was that my neck was much better and I was so happy and thankful. However, there was a sadness in my heart because I knew that it was the last time, at least for this trip, that I would sit at the dining room table with a cup of coffee and my Bible, feasting on God's Word as the daylight began to pour into the room. Often I would look outside the sliding glass door as the grass and flowers vibrantly glowed in the early morning light, and just dwell on God's goodness, faithfulness, love and grace. I just listen. We live such busy lifestyles in the U.S. that often just "being" in God's presence, crawling up onto His lap and laying our heads on His shoulder, is something that rarely happens. Too often we race through the One-Year-Bible assigned reading, offer up a few petition prayers, then rush off to the day's tasks. I want more. I need more. Early mornings are the first fruits of the day, and for me at least, it is a very special time.

One by one, people stirred, music played, dogs barked, more coffee brewed, and the room filled with the awesome individuals that together made our team. I missed them already. We all finished breakfast, loaded up the vans, and took off for the first location, Kechene School. It is a school supported by outside sponsors so that the students can attend free (it is in one of the poorest areas). As with previous sponsored places, the difference was very clear. The children had uniforms, well-stocked and nicely-decorated classrooms, and they proudly sang songs for us with a robust enthusiasm that is rarely seen in the U.S. We hugged them all, said goodbye, and headed to the next orphanage, Kebetabshay. They had a larger campus than previous places, but for good reason as there are 150 children who live there. We went around and visited with the children and, once again, there was one child in particular that stood out. He didn't know any English, but he understood my smile and recognized love, and that speaks volumes. Our last stop was Moses School, but no kids were present. This is a true orphanage in that the children live there, but "School" in their name is not quite accurate because they attend school elsewhere (which is why the kids were gone). We just took a short tour of the facility and then that was it. It was hard to believe we were finished. It was rather anticlimactic due to the kids being gone, and it just left me with that "This is it?" kind of emptiness. After lunch we went to a couple market areas and everyone did souvenir shopping. I really didn't have much to buy so I used the opportunity to read more. We went back home to the Cherokee House, had dinner, showered, packed, then had a "debriefing" meeting. After that, we headed to the airport. Our flight left at 1:30am. After a total of 54 sleepless hours, I was back in my own bed.

I have heard it said that you can leave Africa, but Africa will never leave you. Having now been there, I understand this statement, and I completely agree.

To those of you who supported me financially and/or in prayer, THANK YOU! You helped inject these kids and orphanage directors with hope, and you kindled within me a desire to do more. We serve a faithful God, and I know He will richly bless you for caring enough to help others. Again, on behalf of myself and all those who were touched, THANK YOU!

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 7

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sat, 09 May 2009 19:52:00 +0000

Thursday morning we shopped for mattresses and blankets for the Shallom Street Ministry that we had visited on Tuesday. The kids were not there because they were out doing work organized by the director. Therefore, the actual drop-off was fast, but the process of buying the supplies took the whole morning. I awoke VERY sore in my back and shoulders from tossing and spinning so many children the previous day, so the break gave me a chance to try to stretch out the kinks.

We had lunch at a carepoint called CFI, and the kids were as nice as could be. The carepoint is in a nicer neighborhood and the house was two-story. I went to walk up the stairs and banged my head HARD against the ceiling (the ceiling/stair design was such that the ceiling height did not change to leave headroom as people begin to climb the stairs). If it had been drywall, I would have busted a hole in it, but it was cement. I was stunned for a moment and actually thought I might have broken my neck. It was tingling and in tremendous pain. The rest of the afternoon and evening I had a very hard time turning my head to the right.

Our next stop was Brother’s Church where we met some of the people in the same community. By that time, I had a migraine-level headache, on top of the intense pain in my neck and my sore shoulders and back. Every balloon I blew up made my neck feel like it was being stabbed. But, I kept going. After everyone had balloons I sat on a chair and thought I'd catch a minute or two to relax. A girl came up to me and, with a big smile, proudly showed me the stickers she had received. She asked my name, how old I was, if I had any kids, and so forth. She was probably around 7 or 8 years old and knew English pretty well. I asked her the colors of various balloons and she told me the English color as well as the Amharic. What I thought might be a 5-minute conversation turned into 30 minutes. After the first several minutes I think she could tell I was not 100% and asked how I was. I just told her I was tired (I still conversed with her as I would have if I was 100%, it was just harder to do). She smiled, took the stickers off her shirt, and gave them to me. I was floored. I could tell by the way she showed them off when we met that they were important to her. And yet, she was willing to give them away simply to brighten my day. The amazing thing is, her generosity is typical of the Ethiopian people. Most Americans would not give up a couple cups of coffee a month to FEED an orphan for a month, and this girl gave away something very special to someone with a headache. That just breaks me. As we were going to the vans, I tried my best to tell them the stickers were hers, but she insisted that I keep them. She stood there and waved at me and the rest of the team until we disappeared from view. Someone asked me recently what the number one thing I took away from the trip was. Tough question, but this girl's gesture was probably it, because she was so willing to sacrifice for others despite facing much deeper needs herself. She "took us to school."

Our final stop for the day was Kolfe, and all-boys orphanage. The term "boys" is used loosely because many are men (up to age 25). They are not turned away just because they turn 18. They know they can stay until they are able to adjust and afford to live on their own. I had good conversations with two boys. I sat on one boy's bunk as he showed me his entire photo album and spoke of each picture. I could tell it was special that someone showed an interest in him personally instead of just looking around and leaving. I spoke with another "boy" who I would guess to be around 20 yrs old. We had a great conversation about many things, then the subject turned to his lame legs, which had been that way since birth. He said he had been taught that since he was born that way, God must want him that way. I respectfully disagreed and told him that God is a perfect, loving Father. I described that even myself, as an imperfect father, would never, ever want something like that for my sons. I could tell it gave him something to consider.

We went out to eat for dinner and it took a LONG time to get served...like two hours or so. Going to bed that night was bittersweet; sweet because I needed it, but bitter because it would be our last night sleeping in Ethiopia. It seemed to go by so quickly.

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 6

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Mon, 04 May 2009 17:03:00 +0000

My first couple of years as a teacher was spent at a school that was not in the best part of town. Substitute teachers were hard to find because few wanted to go there. I never had any problems. For me, respect, encouragement, clear expectations, consistent discipline, good lesson plans, and a bit of humor thrown in was all that it took. Kids whom were seen by others as problem students, I saw as possibility students. More often than not, I was able to "break through" and become the one that spurs them forward. Part of what made the previous day difficult is that these were the same kind of boys - rough around the edges, but one look into their eyes and you know there is gold inside. However, given the short amount of time, I don't think any of us "broke through." Therefore, we left with the feeling we still had more to do...there was work left unfinished.

The first place we visited on Wednesday was definitely a change of pace. It was a place called Kind Hearts and the children ranged in age from 4-10. I went all out with swinging the kids around, throwing them up in the air (they never left my hands) and hanging them upside down by their ankles. I played frisbee with the older ones and "hide-the-balloon-under-my-shirt" with the younger ones. I plum wore myself out, but it was awesome. As usual, the gifts and supplies were big hits with the kids.

In the afternoon we toured a place called Hannah's Orphanage. This was the best we had seen and served as a model for other orphanages. In fact, they even had a library and a computer room. Most of the children stay in rented houses, with the older (16-18 yr old) ones acting as head-of-households. Most are in school and shared with us their career dreams. Because of the support they are receiving, those dreams are certainly within reach.

Toward the end of the visit, I was told that the parents of a 7 yr old girl playing near us had both died of AIDS. She is HIV Positive. I watched her bounce a soccer ball back and forth with one our team members and thought about how so many take life for granted. As we were getting ready to leave, I gave her a hug. I can't explain it, but I could tell by the way she hugged me that she knows the score. And, she knows that I know, and that I know that she knows, if you follow. That hug was very special. Again, words fail me here.

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 5

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Fri, 01 May 2009 22:12:00 +0000

The past couple of nights I have slept all the way through, but I have also dreamed of the needs I saw in Ethiopia, so I have awakened with a heavy heart. Today especially has been tough as my thoughts have been on this post, which will likely be the most difficult.

Our first stop was a center run by Emmanuel Church. It appeared to be a day-care type place where mothers could bring their kids for social interaction, meals and other care. Inside one of the rooms I enjoyed complimenting the children on their coloring, which was obviously something they rarely got to do. Outside, I played with several kids and helped tie up balloons to hand out. The mothers and children alike were so beautiful inside and out. This was another occasion where there were no specific kids that stuck out to me, but rather it was a chance to love on as many as possible. It was the first time that I had knowingly held a child with full-blown AIDS, and it was right as we were leaving. I simply cannot describe how that felt. I wish I could.

After lunch we visited a place called Shallom. It is a rescue center for street kids, run by a woman who, like the director I mentioned in my previous post, is famous in Heaven. In fact, she has been doing this, on her own, for 14 years. From what I understand, she has funded it herself as well. She told us that she takes the kids out and has them "work" by going out and witnessing to other street kids. Some also shine shoes. She does this to try to instill a work ethic in them as well as self-confidence. The main room, which had a dirty, splintery wood floor, is where the kids sleep. That's right - on a hardwood floor. Most of them cannot afford to go to school either.

Imagine, if you will, that you are scaling a tall cliff with no ropes. You reach a point to where you are exhausted, and your feet give way. You are holding on with only your hands, and you feel the strength leaving as your and arms begin to shake. Then, in the nick of time and out of nowhere, someone grabs your wrist and pulls you up to a ledge. You are given water, food and get some much needed strength to move on. This time, however, you are accompanied by partners who are encouraging you and sustaining you. As we talked with the director, she hinted around and said everything just short of "I'm done. I can't do this anymore." Our team left her with encouragement, hope, blankets and mattresses for the kids (which we bought and delivered on Thursday), financial assistance, and the very likely possibility of a stateside sponsor. She wept.

Here is some additional information on why her job was/is so difficult. None of the boys were physically affectionate like so many other places we have visited, and no wonder. They have lived on the streets and have had to fend for themselves, which probably consists of a pecking order, with the higher members getting first dibs on the trash heap. My guess is that they are between 9 and 12 yrs old. Most of these kids are HIV positive and many have been preyed upon by men who wait for them outside the shelter and rape them. One boy in particular had been raped multiple times by multiple people. Another boy had been beaten up and a cup was placed over his eye and then pulled off in an attempt to pull his eyeball out with the suction. His eyeball remained, but the fluid came out and his eye became useless. If you use your imagination, the implications of why someone would want his eyeball out are sickening. This is where I have a hard time remaining spiritual. If I see a parent slap a child in the grocery store, at the very least I'll give him or her an angry look, and sometimes I say something. I don't care what the child did, you don't slap a child in the face. When I imagine following one of those boys outside the property and witnessing a man attacking him, the kind of things that enter my mind are violent and scary. Forget justice, it would all be about retribution at that point...I have to stop there.

The director mentioned to us that she is trying to get out of that building and out of the area. The assistance that was given her will help her do that. I was privileged to be a witness to the virtual IV that pumped hope back into her. I hope the move happens soon.

***I'm sorry, but I failed miserably on this one. My words fall far short.

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 4

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 17:20:00 +0000

Lunch on Monday was a treat for me. I just happened to get to sit by someone famous. Probably not many in Addis know his name, and maybe only a handful of people in the States, but trust me, Heaven knows his name. He is the director of Hope for the Hopeless street ministry and orphanage. For several minutes our conversation centered on how we might be able to get Jay's leg treated. Yes, sometimes God heals instantaneously, but sometimes His healing power promotes recovery (which implies a process). The recovery might be through a doctor's hand one time and without a doctor's hand another. My knee doctor referred to my ACL reconstruction as his "best work" and I know the Reason why. I believe, regardless of how or through whose hands, Jay will fully recover. Bottom line, I wanted to see how I could get him into the care of God-directed hands. After that discussion, I complimented him on his care of the kids. There are ditches on both sides of the caregiver road. One side is overly permissive where the kids have no boundaries. The other is a dictatorship. Judging by the kids' good behavior and their willingness to reach out and show love, the director has found the perfect balance between the two sides. It can't be easy when those kids likely come under his care with baggage. Not only does he care for them and love them, but he has sacrificed for them. When the economic downturn happened in the States, he lost half of his support. He had to move his family out of his home and live with his in-laws in order to keep providing for the kids. Construction projects at the orphanage came to a grinding halt. Whoever ends up sponsoring the shelter and/or orphanage can rest assured that the kids could not have a better director. As I mentioned before, there is no doubt this guy is famous in Heaven, and I count it an honor to have had some time with him.

After lunch we went back to the Hope for the Hopeless orphanage where we had briefly visited Saturday night. This time we had several hours to visit. We handed out many gifts and supplies, such as hats, soccer balls, candy, coloring books, shoes...the list goes on. I spent some more time with the 17 yr old boy I had met previously until he participated in a soccer game with other boys and some of our group. I then walked around and loved on as many of the children as I could. Toward the end of the day, we were provided a snack of popcorn and coffee, then the children sang for us, and us for them. Then, just as before, we were showered with hugs, kisses, and I love you's as we headed to the vans and left. The van I was in was completely silent on the way home because it was merely our bodies present. Our minds and our hearts were still with those precious, beautiful children.

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 3

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 14:02:00 +0000

Sunday was rather uneventful. Apparently on Sunday the orphanages are closed. So, we went to church in the morning, but that ended up being a tour of the church building rather than a church service. In the afternoon we visited a couple museums and a zoo. In the evening we went to a restaurant and watched a musical group perform. Day 2 was in the books.

Monday morning we all were excited to find out that we were going back to the "Hope for the Hopeless" orphanage that we briefly visited on Saturday. That would be in the afternoon. In the morning, we visited Hope for the Hopeless street ministry. It is a small compound where homeless kids or kids in distress can find refuge.

As we entered the compound and began greeting the children, I was immediately drawn to a boy who was hobbling around with a walking stick. One leg was clearly nonfunctional. The majority of my time was spent with this boy and another, who just happened to be his roommate. I'll call the lame boy Jay and the other one Jerry (as a side note, I know the boys' names, but I'm not sure I have permission to make them public). Other members of the team and I played soccer with Jerry, who was playing goalie and using the gate to the compound as a goal. He was a tough kid - diving for balls on the rough cement. How many times do we take grass for granted, or get annoyed when we have to mow? A few minutes later I noticed he was not happy anymore and had gone over to stand by one of the workers. Thinking he was physically hurt, I approached them and asked, through the worker, if he had hurt himself. The worker asked him and then gave me the explanation, "He (Jerry) said that when people care for him like this, it makes him think of his mother, who died." I didn't have any words at that point; I just gave him a big, long, tight bear hug, then kissed his head. He hugged me back tightly. I decided to take a couple pics to let him see himself on the digital screen. Below is one of those pics. You can see the pain in his eyes. He smiled and then left for a while. He had gone into the living quarters and, since our team was mainly in the courtyard, I wasn't sure whether I could follow him or not. I turned my attention to Jay.

Despite being limited to the use of one leg, Jay was quite nimble. He was able to climb trees and was also very coordinated with the walking stick. I felt led to ask him if I could pray for him. He walked over to a place he could sit down, and pulled up his pant leg. I didn't expect to see what I saw. I'm not a doctor, but it seemed to me that his leg was badly broken (I'm talking both bones, at an angle of 50-60 degrees). As I prayed, I felt the tangible power of God go into his leg. I can count on one hand the times I've actually FELT the healing power of God, and I believe Jay felt it too. After I prayed, I tracked down the director and asked for more detail. Jay's leg was indeed broken, and it had happened two years ago. TWO YEARS!! In addition, the director said that if he falls or hits it wrong, he gets "wounds" (meaning the bone(s) break through the skin). I was floored. Something that could/can be fixed so easily in the states had stolen two uninhibited play years from this precious boy. I just wasn't sure how to react. Part of me was very angry, part of me just wanted to bawl, but before I could decide how to react, there was Jerry again, tapping my arm. He gave me a drawing that he had made, and on the top was "I love you Mark." I smiled, told him I loved him too and then gave him another hug. Between Jay and Jerry, I received 6 drawings. Look me up 50 years from now, and I will still have them. They are priceless.

By this time, people had gone back to the living quarters, so I followed Jay and Jerry back there. It was at this time that I first found out they were roommates. They had a small, dark room with a bunk bed and a bathroom. It reminded me of a prison cell, but it was much smaller and less clean. They were both proud to show me their beds and wanted pictures taken. They pointed out various belongings and I smiled and complimented them (they knew a little bit of English - "very nice" was understood). Despite what little these boys had, they were the sweetest boys you could imagine. I wanted to give them something, so I found a couple sheets of paper and wrote them both the same note. It was something like, "I am very happy to meet you and spend time with you. You are valuable and God has a great plan for your life. I love you." When I gave them the notes, they made a beeline to one of the workers so he could translate it. As he read, their faces lit up like they had received a million bucks. We hugged again and then all the children sang for us. After the singing, Jay and Jerry, still beaming, came up and asked, "Tomorrow?" I had to tell them no, we weren't coming back tomorrow because we had other places to visit. Their smiles faded a bit. Everyone said goodbye and we left. On my Facebook page I described the kids as being "Easy to love, hard to leave." This was one of the prime examples.

*** As a side note, I did not feel it would be appropriate for me to ask Jay if I could take a picture of his leg. However, I did ask the director to see if he could take one and email it to me. Once I have it, I plan to hook up with another team member and start a fund raising campaign to get Jay's leg fixed. Thus far, the director hasn't sent me anything. I will keep you all posted.

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 2

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 19:38:00 +0000

It was Saturday, April 18th, and time to "get to it." The first orphanage we visited was Abenezer's. I was about 3-4 hours away. When we got there, the kids were seated in the middle of a large field. There were huge smiles on their faces and it was easy to see that they were bursting with curiosity. Taking pictures and showing them the digital screen was very fascinating to them. I'm sure the vast majority rarely got such a treat. It was a little awkward at first for two reasons. First, it seemed we were just killing time until the presentation(s) started, which was anyone's guess. So, we didn't know whether we had 2 minutes to play with them or 20. Secondly, as a former schoolteacher, my physical interaction with students was limited to handshakes, high-fives, and shoulder-pats. Hugging children or picking them up is a good way to start a scandal in U.S. public schools. It took a couple hours for me to realize it was okay here. I performed a couple "magic" tricks (like the one where you pretend to take off the end of your finger) and then had fun showing them how to do it. I also juggled three rocks for them, which was a big hit. I taught some how to juggle with two rocks and they soaked up the praise and clapping from their peers and me. The activities started with a presentation from Steve and Debbie, pastors from Georgia whose church sponsors the entire orphanage. One building was almost completed and a second had been started. It was a blessing to see how they were touched by meeting the kids face to face and seeing firsthand the work that was being done. Next, the kids were divided by age group and, one group at a time, were fed an Easter feast inside the finished building. We continued to play with the kids in the groups that were waiting. When everyone was done eating, we started handing out gifts. Each child received a backpack along with six notebooks and a pen and pencil. Without these supplies, the kids can't attend school, but now they will get to go. In addition to the school supplies, they also received blankets and kazoos. They were overjoyed and very grateful. We left around 2:30 or 3:00 and headed to lunch.

Lunch was provided in the home of the mother of one of the translators who accompanied us. It was the first time I had Ethiopian food and it was awesome. After the meal they provided the traditional Ethiopian coffee ceremony. They roasted the beans over glowing charcoal, then took the crackling beans around for everyone to inhale the smoke. The whole process took over an hour. I think me waiting an hour for coffee would be like my wife watching someone at a candy store make fudge from scratch. Despite the enormous need for patience, the end result was delicious.

After lunch we headed back toward Addis. There was another orphanage we were to visit and time was limited. We got there shortly before dark and only spent 20 minutes or so. I lost it at this place. It was called "Hope for the Hopeless." I mentioned earlier that I was a little hesitant to be as physical as I wanted at the first orphanage. The kids at this place didn't give me any choice. They crowded around me and hugged my legs tightly. They grabbed my hands and arms and just clung to me, squeezing my fingers and smiling ear to ear. Most of these kids had no family, and one might expect that their hearts would be hesitant to open up and show love for fear that their love would not be reciprocated. On the contrary, to them, it seemed worth the risk. Rest assured, there were no "polite" hugs like so many in the U.S. give. These were unbridled, whole-body/whole-being hugs full of reckless abandon, as if it were the last time they would hug someone. We took a very short tour of the place and one of the older boys proudly showed me his bunk. I told him it was very nice and he smiled. For the rest of the tour, he held my hand. I had learned on the way over the it is common for men to hold the hand of their best friends. It's nothing sexual at all, simply an act of friendship. I learned he was seventeen and was the oldest one there. I thought, "Wow, if I held the hand of a 17 yr old boy as a teacher in the states, I'd be fired in an instant and would have to register with the state." By the time the tour was finished, it was completely dark, and I was glad. Glad because I could not control the tears streaming down my face as the kids once again showered me/us with squeezes, hugs, kisses and "I love you's." First day, and I was already messed up.

(Pictured below is the 17 yr old, whom I got to spend more time with on a subsequent visit)

Ethiopia 2009 - Pt. 1

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 11:54:00 +0000

I'm sure you've all been in that place of frustration where you've taken what you think are awesome pictures of breathtaking scenery. Then, to your dismay, you look at the pictures and realize they fall far short of truly capturing the enormity of what you saw. That's where I am right now, not only with pictures, but also with words. Was I touched by Africa? Absolutely! Can I adequately describe what I saw and felt using mere words? So far, I've tried some rough drafts and have fallen waaaay short. I guess the only thing to do is try my best. I will start with more general background information and then maybe I'll find words for the rest. Forgive me if these thoughts are random and lack a logical flow.

First and foremost, THANK YOU to everyone who prayed. Have you ever gone on a trip and it seemed like everything fit together such that you would describe it as "easy?" That's what I felt and saw. Suffice it to say that the prayer cover was obvious.

For me, there was no culture shock, other than trying to figure out whether any "rules of the road" exist. Numerous times drivers would miss each other and pedestrians by mere inches. We never hit anyone, although the other van had a small accident. Nobody has insurance there, so the process is for all witnesses to crowd around the scene and be judge and jury on who was to blame. The guilty party pays for the damages on the spot. The process took maybe 20-30 minutes, and finally the other driver was determined to be guilty. I found out that there is an honor system in Ethiopia. If someone is dishonest, they are shamed and disgraced. In addition, if someone tries to steal something, the owner shouts "Leba!" ("thief" in Amharic) and there will be a mad rush of bystanders to catch the person. In the U.S. it's the opposite. We pretend we didn't hear, or if we do help and the thief gets a skinned knee from being tackled, we'll be sued.

The people of Ethiopia are beautiful inside and out. They are very kind, generous, accommodating, polite, you name it. At one church where we played with children, one girl gave me the stickers that she received. Before we left, I told her they were hers and I wanted her to keep them, but she insisted she wanted me to keep them. I also received some drawings that I will always treasure.

The Ethiopian food was delicious. I think I personally had Ethiopian food 40% of the time (sometimes we ate at restaurants where it was our choice). I had various dishes of beef, chicken, lamb and goat, as well as the engera (flat, sponge-like Ethiopian bread that is used as an edible utensil).

The countryside of Ethiopia was downright beautiful. I'll try to post some pics, but as I mentioned earlier, they fall far short of doing justice to what we saw. One would think, by looking at all the agriculture, that Ethiopia would not be so poor. However, even though there is rain, often the rain does not come when it is most needed. Crops grow and turn green, but do not get rain when they are supposed to produce fruit, so it is like having a green corn stalk with no corn.

The city of Addis was busy with heavy traffic and vendors selling vegetables, goats, sheep, chickens, and cows. Ordering "take out" consists of stopping your vehicle by a herd of goats, paying the shepherd, and loading the goat inside the van or tying it on top. I never saw someone load a full sized cow. That would have been interesting, to say the least. There were also delivery donkeys carrying large loads of whatever merchandise. We even saw one camel, which apparently is rare. The one thing that did take some getting used to was the smoke. Trash is burned and there were times when the smoke was quite heavy and putrid.

I guess that does it for background info from my head. Next I'll do my best to describe things from my heart.

I'm Going to Africa!!

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 13:26:00 +0000

Here's a tip: If you are applying for a passport that you need soon, and the post office lady assures you they are ahead of schedule so there's no need to expedite, pay for the expedited processing anyway. I know the letter below doesn't give much time (sent it out on Saturday), but my passport just came in last week. I covet your prayers for me, my family and my trip team as I step out on this mission...

****

Dear friends,

I have some VERY exciting news - I'm going on a missions trip to Africa!! Missions has been on my heart for many years, but due to work schedules/projects, I have not had opportunities to go on overseas trips. I have been active on the local mission field, but I have always wanted to do more. Almost two years ago I started my own technology business, partly to give myself the flexibility to go on trips such as this one. So, needless to say, I am thrilled to be finally stepping out and doing what's in my heart.

I will be going to Ethiopia from April 16-25th to serve with Children’s HopeChest (hopechest.org) as they visit several orphanages. Many children there feel abandoned and rejected. With no one to offer them God’s hope and practical help, their chances to survive and live a full life of faith, family, education, and work are slim. Without intervention, many will end up in crime and/or prostitution, while others commit suicide. Through offering resources and relationships to children in need, Children’s HopeChest is making a difference in the lives of some of the 143 million orphans in the world...one child at a time.

My mission is this: I am going to be a dad to every kid I come across...smiling at the children, holding them, teaching them, doing crafts, singing songs...basically just loving on them and giving each and every one a basis for hope. Every person has a divine destiny, regardless of skin color, social status or geographic area. Maybe one of the children I hold will see the love in my eyes, realize that he/she is valuable to me and to God, and gain the courage to pursue his/her destiny. Maybe that child will become a leader, bring hope to surrounding regions and even change nations. There is so much that can be accomplished through a simple act of love and obedience.

I am writing to ask you to consider helping in the following ways:

1) Cover me in prayer while I am ministering to these precious children (and pray for a safe trip to/from Africa). Pray for God's supernatural favor and blessing to cover our entire team.
2) Prayerfully consider helping me financially with the trip. The cost of the trip is $2,600 and the money is due by this Friday, March 27th. It is tax-deductible and the instructions are at the bottom of this letter. Know this - I would never ask you to do something I wasn't willing to do myself. This trip has cost me much more than what the trip costs due to the business I have turned down in order to go. So, anything you could do to help would be very much appreciated.

In His service,
Mark D

Jack (aka Jesus) - Part 3

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 22:52:00 +0000

Imagine, if you will, that you are watching TV and Jesus is in the room with you. You are switching channels and happen to land on one showing Jesus speaking words of great importance that you have never heard before. He beams because he knows you are watching and listening to him. Would you change the channel and keep surfing? Hardly.

Now for a scenario that you don't have to imagine because it has likely happened to you. You're tired and just want to veg a bit. You are switching TV channels and happen to land on one of those programs that show malnourished children in underdeveloped areas of the world. What do you do? Do you change the channel?

Guess what - those scenarios are one and the same. Jesus said, "Inasmuch as you have done it (or not done it) to the least of these, my brethren, you have done it (or not done it) to Me." How many times have YOU switched the channel and ignored Jesus?

The excuses are many...Wouldn't it be easier not to get involved? Does the little that I could do really matter? I already sponsor one child and that's all I can do. If I don't pay attention, I don't have to think about it, and maybe it will go away. Can I really trust the organization(s)? It looks like a propaganda machine. What if I opened myself up and something didn't work out the way it was supposed to? The list goes on and on.

I had no idea that Jack's story would not be the happy ending that I might have expected. It hurt. There were questions. Frustrations. Sadness. I could have saved myself much of that if I had sheltered myself and looked out for my own comfort , if I had just left well enough alone and contacted my supervisor when Jack came back. But is that what Jesus did?

My Bible says Jesus died for us while we were yet sinners. He emptied Himself without any guarantee that we would make the conscious choice to accept His sacrifice. Wouldn't it have been easier to stick with the comfort of heaven and being present with God? He left His comfort zone, paid the ultimate price of being tortured and killed, and yet some still reject Him. Why did He do it? Because we are worth the risk.

Jack was worth the risk.

Yes, there is a risk to opening up oneself and stepping out of the comfort zone. Not everyone will give us accolades, people may ridicule us, things may not go as planned. People may call us crazy for loving others the way Jesus did - a dangerous love that is offered with reckless abandon.

He who shelters and protects his life will lose it, but he who gives his life to helping others will find it.

True living is only found by giving our lives for others. True love gives to others when you may not get anything back. I determine to live sacrificially and love dangerously.

Jack (aka Jesus) - Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 19:57:00 +0000

I found out from a coworker that the man's name was Jack. The fire that took so much from him physically also took the lives of his wife and children. I called him by name the next several times he came to order food and also helped him bag up the food and steady his drink. A couple times when I had money on me I covered it for him.

One night after work I saw Jack walking along the road near the store. I pulled over and got out of the car. Finally, a chance to witness to him about the love of God and the price Jesus paid for him. However, as soon as I started telling him that God loved him, he became furious and raised both hands toward heaven (if he had fingers, I knew which ones would be up). The spit and snot flew as he exclaimed two words that obviously were meant to be "F___ God!" My heart sank. He started walking away and I walked after him, surprised that he wasn't more receptive to someone who had treated him with respect and dignity. Finally, I realized he wasn't going to have anything to do with me, and I let him go.

A couple nights later, I saw Jack again. He seemed to be struggling with something. I pulled over, got out of my car and said hi to him. He had a cigarette in his mouth and gave me an open matchbook. It was cold and windy. Instead of waiting for me to strike the match and hold it up to him, he leaned down as I was striking the match. I exclaimed, "Be careful, I don't want to burn you." Then I realized what I had said. "Mark, you stupid IDIOT! Of all the things to say!" I couldn't believe I had said it, but I moved on and lit his cigarette. In my opinion, it was better to consider it no big deal and go on than it would be to try to backpedal and apologize. As soon as the cigarette was lit, he nodded a thank you and took off walking like he had a couple nights prior. I got back in my warm car and prayed for him.

I didn't see Jack the next day, or the next. A week went by, then two. I began to be hopeful that he had found somewhere to stay. I still lived with my parents and there were no bedrooms available, nor did I know of any shelters in the area. Hopefully he was okay. Several days later the same coworker who had told me Jack's name informed me that he had jumped in front of a moving truck and killed himself.

Maybe you thought this was going to be a good story. Maybe you thought it was going to be a testimony. Maybe you thought you were going to read a happy ending. I certainly did, so the harsh reality that not every story has a happy ending hit me hard. Very hard. I don't like to feel like I failed. And, I sure as heck don't want to wonder whether I might have contributed to the story's tragic ending. Those are questions that can eat at someone. Those are the thoughts that haunt. Those are the places where life gets uncomfortable, and life is not supposed to be uncomfortable, right?

Wrong.

Jack (aka Jesus) - Part 1

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 18:48:00 +0000

When I was in my late teens I was working at the concession stand of a local discount store. It was Black Friday and I was frantically trying to fill orders and check people out. Then, something interesting happened. The line that had been constantly long became shorter and shorter. I soon saw why. A man approached the counter who had been severely burned. He had no fingers and the bumps that were his thumbs were barely movable. One eye had been seared almost shut (not even sure had an eye on that side) and the other could only open halfway. He had open sores on his virtually-hairless head which were probably a result of running into things. He had no ears and had snot running out of the two holes where his nose used to be. His mouth had also been seared shut on one side, making his speech pretty much unintelligible. It was also very evident that he was homeless.

I'm sure we've all been in the situation where you meet someone that has been maimed or scarred in some way...you try not to look at the deformity so as not to make him or her self-conscious. With this man, people looked away quickly, put their arms around their children, and hustled the other direction. Nobody wanted to even stand in line with him. It rips my heart up to think about how this man must have felt. Where do you look? How do you avoid looking where you think you're not supposed to? What do you say? How do you act? These are questions that make people uncomfortable, and it seems so many people, Christians included, serve the god of comfort.

When I looked into this man's eye, I recognized him. It was Jesus. Suddenly, there was an overwhelming love that came over me and I just wanted to hug him, but I was behind the counter. So, I smiled and said, "Hi, what can I get for you." I treated him just like I treated everyone else. After I interpreted his order (from his pointing, grunting, and head nods/shakes) I got his food and drink and he handed me a bill. When I gave him his change, I put one hand under his hand and held it steady while I gave him the coins. He looked at me, stunned that I would touch him...especially on his stump. I smiled and said, "Have a great day!" As he was picking up his food and drink from the counter, he couldn't handle both, and he accidentally spilled his drink. Out of frustration he threw his food down as well and stormed out of the store. I immediately began cleaning up the mess and prayed for him under my breath. My supervisor came over and exclaimed, "You let me know when that man comes here, he's not allowed in this store!" In no uncertain terms I told her that I was going to serve anyone who is a paying customer and challenged her to fire me for that. She didn't.

Part 2 coming soon...

Reality Check - Part 4

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 23:55:00 +0000

Do you see, do you see
All the people sinking down
Don't you care, don't you care
Are you gonna let them drown

How can you be so numb
Not to care if they come
You close your eyes
And pretend the job's done

"Oh bless me lord, bless me Lord"
You know it's all I ever hear
No one aches, no one hurts
No one even sheds one tear

But He cries, He weeps, He bleeds
And He cares for you needs
And you just lay back
And keep soaking it in
Oh can't you see it's such a sin

'Cause He brings people to you door
And you turn them away
As you smile and say
"God bless you, be at peace"
And all heaven just weeps
'Cause Jesus came to you door
You've left him out on the streets

Open up open up
And give yourself away
You see the need, you hear the cries
So how can you delay

God's calling and you're the one
But like Jonah you run
He's told you to speak
But you keep holding it in
Of can't you see it's such a sin

The world is sleeping in the dark
That the church just can't fight
'Cause it's asleep in the light
How can you be so dead
When you've been so well fed
Jesus rose from the grave
And you, you can't even get out of bed

Oh, Jesus rose from the dead
Come on get out of your bed

How can you be so numb
Not to care if they come
You close your eyes
And pretend the job's done
You close your eyes
And pretend the job's done

Don't close your eyes
Don't pretend the job's done
Come away, come away, come away with me my love
Come away, come away, come away with me my love

"Asleep in the Light" by Keith Green

Reality Check - Part 3

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 23:49:00 +0000

I read three books over the past several days that gave me a spiritual butt-whooping. They were:

"Red Letters: Living a Faith That Bleeds" by Tom Davis
"Fields of the Fatherless" by Tom Davis
"Crazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God" by Francis Chan

These books made me realize that I have become too comfortable. They hit me like a ton of bricks because I realized that I haven't been aggressive enough with seeking out people to help. While I have done things to assist people whose paths just happen to cross mine, I have waited for opportunities instead of searching for them.

Consider the account of the sheep and goats in Matthew 25. Notice that the goats argued (verses 44-45)...

Then they also will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to You?’ Then He will answer them, saying, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.’

The goats, just like the Marines in part 1 of this post, thought they were doing everything right. How many Christians today think Christianity is this:
1) Read a chapter or two of the Bible each day
2) Say a quick prayer before meals
3) Try to go to church regularly and tithe
4) Show God's love by being friendly and nice to people
5) Try to live a perfect life by avoiding all the "bad" sins

I don't know about you, but I don't see any of the above items in mentioned in Matthew 25. These things, while Biblical and important, can easily be viewed as obligations rather than things we do out of sheer love for Jesus. What IS mentioned is whether we got out of our comfort zone and helped those people that society has forgotten. I have never been satisfied by the status quo, but I have sometimes felt alone in the desire for more. Reading the books I mentioned earlier made me realize I am not alone. There are people, dare I say movements, that are going back to the basics of Christianity - a heart to God and a hand to man.

I am officially out of my comfort zone. No longer will I let convenience determine when I will launch out into the things God has placed in my heart. My faith is either growing or decaying. What kinds of things am I doing that require faith? It's time to step out of the boat.

Reality Check - Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 20:22:00 +0000

Leaving a church is a very, very serious thing. I consider it a divorce...it's that serious. I have never been a pastor, but I can only imagine what is must be like when people leave a church just because they don't agree with something the pastor said. That's like filing for divorce because you and your spouse disagree on something - stupid. Biblically, there is a valid reason for divorce, and that is "marital unfaithfulness." I think everyone would agree that an affair is marital unfaithfulness, but I have also heard people teach that unfaithfulness extends beyond that. My personal opinion is that abusive situations fall into that category as well. Much to say in that area, but for now, I will stick to the point that I am making: Marriage is a covenant before God and should be taken as such, but when one person breaks the covenant, there is Biblical support that the other is free to choose whether they will stay or go. Some stay and try to salvage things. Some go.

The Bible says that God places people in a position of authority (Rom 13:1-2). We are to be in submission to those in authority except in the case where they are giving directions contrary to God's Word. We all are under the spiritual authority of our pastors. However, the Apostle Paul said that it IS possible to abuse the authority given by God (1 Cor 9:18) and/or act in such a way that "disqualifies" oneself from being a leader (1 Cor 9:27). With that in mind, it seems to me that "pastoral unfaithfulness" would give people Biblical support for leaving a church. Just like a spouse can choose to stay and hope for the best in a marital unfaithfulness situation, a church member can choose to stay or go. Some stay and try to salvage things. Some go.

Submission to authority, and when to challenge or act outside that authority, is something that the two Marines in Part 1 learned the hard way. They blindly followed the orders of their superior officer and forgot their duty as Marines. All of us will stand before God and give account for our lives. Some have rebelled against Godly authority figures and they will have to answer for that. On the flip side, if we blindly follow authority figures who have abused their authority, will we not still be under judgment like the two Marines? I don't want to be in either group. Seems to me that so many Christians today do fall into one or the other, and that is why I wanted to write about it. More soon...

Reality Check - Part 1

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 19:09:00 +0000

"A Few Good Men" is a movie that speaks loudly to the situation in many churches today. If you haven't seen the movie, here is a brief summary and script excerpt (sources: http://www.celebritywonder.com/movie/1992_A_Few_Good_Men.html and http://www.script-o-rama.com/movie_scripts/f/few-good-men-script-transcript.html):

Marine Pfc. William T. Santiago, stationed at Guantanamo, Cuba, just did not measure up to the high standards set by the U.S. Marine Corps. He is killed in a hazing incident perpetrated by Pfc. Lawson Downey and Lance Cpl. Harold W. Dawson. A mis-matched set of Navy lawyers is given the task of providing the defense in the court martial. And over the whole idea is the shadow of Col. Nathan Jessep (played by Jack Nicholson), who commands the Marines at Guantanamo. We know almost immediately that Jessep is the source of all the evil that has taken place. Little effort is spared in the script to make Jessep as vile and politically incorrect as possible. The goals of our three defense lawyers are first, to stop conflicting with each other; second, to put together a case to help Downey and Dawson; and third, if possible, to at the same time bring down the incredibly nasty Col. Jessep.

If you have seen the movie, you know that Tom Cruise's character baits Col. Jessep (Jack Nicholson) into admitting he was the one that ordered the code red which led to Santiago's death. The rogue soldier is arrested and led out of the courtroom. The two marines who carried out the orders naturally assume this means they are off the hook. The verdict reading follows:

All rise!

Have you reached a verdict?
- We have, sir. Corporal Dawson and Private Downey. Of the charge of murder, the members find the accused -- not guilty. On the charge of conspiracy to commit murder, the members find the accused -- not guilty. On the charge of conduct unbecoming a US Marine, the members find the accused guilty as charged.

You are sentenced to time already served, and to be dishonourably discharged from the Marines. This court-martial is adjourned.

Downey: What did that mean? Hal? What did that mean? Colonel Jessep said he ordered the Code Red. What did we do wrong?

Dawson: It's not that simple.

Downey: We did nothing wrong!

Dawson: Yeah, we did. We're supposed to fight for people who can't fight for themselves. We were supposed to fight for Willy.

So many parallels here...Part 2 coming soon.

The Purging Begins

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 20:57:00 +0000

Ever reach that breaking point of emotion or frustration (or both) when you are not sure whether to yell at the top of your lungs or fall down and weep (or both)? I have been there for about three months, but have been traveling toward that breaking point for years. The one year project I mentioned in an earlier post got cut short at 6 months (Jan 30th). It could not have come at a better time. Long story, but I'm completely spent. This past week I took care of some high priority to-do items, one of which was to cast out the lines for my next project. Now, I regroup. I desperately need a time of solace and renewal. That renewal will occur as I pray/fast, feed on Scripture and books that rock my spirit, and write (blog posts, songs, etc). So, I managed to get a great rate ($20/day) on an extended-stay hotel a mile from my home, where I will stay during the day and let God speak. I am reminded of Margaret Becker's song "Find Me" because that's where I am right now. I am seeking and listening.

I'm gonna move on down to Elliston
Let my hair grow wild and free
Rent a second story studio
Find the other side of me
I'm gonna sit out on the edge of the fire escape
Feel a little destitute
Search for feelings that will help me remember
The love that I had for You
Find me, find me
I'll wait for You
Find me, find me
I'll wait for You
I'm gonna give away my stereo
Give away my T.V.
I'm going back to essentials, a chair and a lamp
And the Book that You wrote to me
You see, I'm looking for the You that used to speak so clear
I'm looking for the me that had a heart to hear
And I'm looking for the passion that help me her
On the edge
CHORUS
You see, I'm looking for the me that I used to know
I'm looking for the love that was out of control
'Cause I feel a little cold here in the afterglow
CHORUS
Find me, find me
I'll, I'll wait for You

God Is In Control

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sun, 11 Jan 2009 20:14:00 +0000

Last Fall Aidan managed to climb over the crib rail and fell with a thud. Other than a nasty bump on the forehead and being a bit freaked from the fall, he was okay. Rather than get a toddler bed which we didn't think he was ready for yet, we decided to get an inexpensive surveillance camera to keep an eye on him. Watching him is now my favorite TV show (and pretty much the only one I have time to watch). At times, he thinks Cindy and I have left him, but we're actually keeping a very close eye on him. Our hearts ache when he cries but we smile when he sits there and babbles or hugs his stuffed animals. Fatherhood has helped me see more of God's heart for us in so many ways. If you watch the news, or if you have been affected by the economic downturn, there could be the tendency to wonder where God is. Maybe you don't get the "warm fuzzies" of His touch as often. Various circumstances can make it seem like He isn't paying attention, but He is always there. He smiles with us, cries with us, sings over us with joy and He loves us beyond what we can comprehend. Trust Him, and seek Him with all your heart.

Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Aug 08 Pics

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 18:32:00 +0000

Aidan - 2 yrs; Ethan - 7 months

My Provider

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 11:06:00 +0000

As you may recall if you have followed this blog, a little over a year ago I had a decision to make concerning my job. At that time, I had been at four companies in five years due to three layoffs and one company buyout. My resume looks like I'm a job hopper, but on the contrary, I chose to remain dedicated to the companies despite their struggles, me being lied to and so forth. I'm a firm believer that when we prove ourselves in the smaller things, God will entrust us with more. I spent time in prayer about launching my own business and also did my homework in the form of books and research. Last July I started a technology consulting company and it has been going well. Currently, there are only two employees - myself and my wife. I am out doing the on-site work and she is "on call" to do faxes, calls, emails or whatever, which she can do while staying home with our two boys. The majority of the work I have landed has been at the same company. They have been happy with me and I have enjoyed working there, but each project has lasted from 3-12 weeks. Sometimes another project has started immediately after the previous project and at other times there has been up to a couple weeks' "break" (not really a break, because I used the opportunities to get some business housekeeping items done). This has been challenging for two reasons. First, because the projects were short-term, budgeting has been difficult. Secondly, there has been much overtime and several overnight tasks (due to migrations to production servers). The overtime has paid well since I bill hourly, but I would prefer to have a long-term assignment with 40-45 hour weeks. That would make budgeting easier and I could have more time for things I enjoy. I have managed to faithfully get my early morning prayer time in as well as evening/weekend family time, but little room has been left for much else. Believe me when I say I think of my blog friends quite often, even though I haven't written much. I look forward to catching up with all of you, writing more songs, doing more outreach/volunteer work, and so forth.

I've got three words: God is faithful!!! He takes us from faith to faith and glory to glory as we continue to set our hearts and minds on Him. In July I landed a long-term project with a different company - it lasts a minimum of one year and may end up going multiple years. In addition, there is rarely overtime or weekend work. Praise God!!

Despite the fact that the past year consisted of short-term projects, we were able to make significant ground in getting out of debt. Even with the "down time" factored in, I still doubled my income. We upped our giving to various ministries and obeyed God when he led us in other areas (and will continue to do so). Our Provider takes care of us!

I plan to keep the company where it is at the moment (two people) and save up for Phase 2. Phase 1, which was getting steady work for myself and catching up in our personal finances, is going well. Phase 2 would be hiring more people. What I need is an Account Exec to call various companies and market our services. This is something I could do, but since I am on-site at clients and billing the time, I am unable. I would rather keep the steady work myself, then hire somebody to seek and coordinate the new business. God's timing is always best. His Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. He knows my heart and holds my future. He knows I am looking forward to Phase 3 - the point where I have enough people and contract work that I can work move from doing the actual consulting work myself to more of a coordinator/manager role. It is at that point that I see the availability to do overseas missions trips and other things of that nature that are in my heart. I know that might appear like I am delaying things...not at all. There is a mission field here at home and I am on it. I am involved in ministry and outreach, it's just that the things have been local. I love to help people regardless of where they are. I am excited about the various means to help people and thrilled to have more seed to sow. More to come - thanks for sticking around!

Baby Pics of Ethan

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 22:29:00 +0000

Any baby who gives the "peace" sign at less than two hours old is VERY cool in my book. :)

Update #1 (Family - Welcoming Baby #2)

noreply@blogger.com (Mark D) — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 19:20:00 +0000

Ethan Connor D_______ was born January 17th, 2008. He weighed 8 lbs 9 oz and was 21" long. We found out a couple days before the due date that he was not only breech, but had a bigger than expected head, so the doc recommended a C-section. It was a tough call to make because Cindy and I attended a natural childbirth class before she had Aidan and she tried to deliver without any epidural. Suffice it to say that we both feel that the less medical intervention, the better. We discussed the possibility of the doctor trying to turn the baby and he said that was actually considered more invasive than a C-section. Trust me, I investigated things online (risks of C-section, danger to baby, etc) so I would know what to watch out for and how to pray. Bottom line for me is that it is Cindy's body, so I left it to her. Our doctor is amazing and everything went smoothly. Let me take this opportunity to say I am so proud of my wife. She is one tough cookie. She actually didn't need ANY pain medication when she came home. Aidan (20 months now) was and is so loving to his new little brother. He knows to be careful and likes to kiss the top of Ethan's head. No colic with Ethan, so things are much easier than the first time around. The coolest thing right now is that Ethan is a big smiler. He just beams and it melts my heart. He also smiles really big at Aidan when he walks by. Right now the only thing I'm trying to balance is how to spend more time with Ethan without Aidan feeling jealous. Aidan, for the most part, has adjusted exceptionally well, so I don't want to rock that boat. On the flip side, I don't feel like I have bonded as much with Ethan as I did when Aidan was his age. It's a juggling act, but I am so blessed. Being a daddy is absolutely wonderful.