Dear Little Beauty

Clearly I can't keep a blog

2011-11-30T12:40:00.000-08:00

Well if last month was long overdue, I think this one is passed that. Here you are a lovely 17 month old! You are clearly a genius, tying shoes, spelling words, counting to 86 and really good at persuasive essays. We have already started your college applications.

Actually, you are a smarty pants.

I can't get over your jump in speech. You had been parroting back every sound over the past few months. But now you clearly have a great vocabulary. You stick to 1-2 syllables (which is about where Josie is too) but you say everything flawlessly (at least 80% of the time). You label everything you see and know all your corresponding animal sounds.

You have nearly all your teeth in at this point, not the three year old ones yet, but the... incisors? And you love brushing them.

You are great at climbing and running but still have a tiny bit of a toddle to your movement.

You have slimmed out a lot. You're tall, nearly as tall as Josie and you have a lot of thick short hair.

You are a snug 24 month top wearer.

You enjoy a good puppet show put on by your sister and anything daredevilish.

You LOVE food. You eat everything with the best of em. I spy a hot dog eating contest vocation in your future. You're still nursing but only for comfort and naps or bedtime now. Which is actually still a good chunk of the day I suppose.

You're down to one nap a day, but you need that nap.

You still love shoes ridiculously. I suppose you always will.

Peek a boo is still a super funny game. Especially if its Josie playing with you. You're better at finding at hide and seek than Josie is -- and sometimes you look at her blankly as if to say, Mommy is right there.

You can count to three, though I'm sure you have no idea why.

And you know many, many, many signs and the funny thing is while Josie has invented her own version of most of them, you do the majority of them correctly rather than like she does.

You come over so I can kiss your boo boos then run off.

You sulk when you don't get your way.

You still love music and dancing (of course). You've got some pretty funky moves too.

I will post at your 18th month check up how chunky you still are and your height percentages.

All in all you are a sweetie and amaze us daily.

Long overdue (14 months)

2011-08-31T14:57:00.000-07:00

Well August is almost over and I have been meaning to update the blog in such a long time!

Little Mary, let's see. What can't you do now? Today you stood on the little rocking chair with one foot on each armrest and pumped it with your legs. I am sure I call you daredevil at least a dozen times a day and your balance continues to astound me.

Today you're cutting your first molars. Poor baby. You were pretty grumpy yesterday, which is unlike you, and today I saw them. Two. One on each side on top! Ouch! So at the moment, you're eating really cold cut up grapes and in a much better mood.

So what's new? You have been signing all the basic baby signs and can say all the spoken words Josie knows. You imitate all of Josie's nonverbal gestures and whining while pointing, so I'm sure you'd be talking more if it wasn't for that. You say Neno like Josie instead of Nemo. But it's still super cute. I've heard you say every sound. You generally stay quiet but if there's an inflection or consonant combo you've not yet tried you catch us all off guard. You can say shoe and bump with all their compound complexity Josie probably won't master before another surgery and years and years of therapy.

The other day coming back from the beach (which you are still not 100% on board with the sand and ocean combo), Josie was whining in the backseat so I said with unusual forced emphasis "I LOOOVE you JO-see" And a split second after the words left my mouth, Brian and I both heard "I love you." In a tiny voice! Shocked? yeah. The l and the y were both on it, it was just a very small and tiny voice. You have the cutest little timid voice. High pitched and sweet and soft. Oh and the other day driving around I said, "Who wants a Coke icy? Ice-ee, ice-ee, ice-ee?" And Josie said "I-ee" and you said,
"Coke."

What else? You can basically run, wobbly because your legs are still super chunky and so cute. You love to dance and its the funniest thing I've ever seen. Across from Swing and the Monkey.

You definitely have a temper. You want things to go the way you want them to go (sounds like mommy?) and you are very determined to get it to work your way. You were spooning rice into a teapot today and the rice wouldn't stay on the spoon when you tilted it and you were getting pretty frustrated.

What else... Finding Nemo mesmerizes you both. We dance a lot every day. And you love, love, love bath time. Any water play actually. Flour play. oh and painting. You LOVE painting. Well anything messy really. You imitate Josie doing pretend play too, but I don't think you understand why she makes her people dance together, but it's still way adorable.

Your hair is really getting curly. It's still kind of an auburn and your eyes are still blue. Guess they're staying that way! Sure there's more, and more important stuff. Oh your weight is finally around average, 50-70% but if you were just a half an inch taller you'd be in the 95% for height. You are a very tall 14 month old! I can't wait to see how you measure up at 18 months. But let's not hurry to get there ;)

Lastly, you and Josie are still BFFs and love each other though I hate to tell you, she has way more patience for you than you have for her.

All around beautiful baby allstar, math major and pro athlete in the making! Oh and shoes... you are still really, really obsessed with shoes. The other day at mass, I carried Josie's shoes in because she was sleeping and you got SO MAD when I put them on her feet when she woke up. You kept trying to pull them off and shrieking. You love pretty shoes. Let the record show, you love shoes.

12 month stuff

2011-07-07T13:05:00.000-07:00

So little beauty, you had a lot of fun stacking some big chunky blocks today. I have no clue where you are in months per skills since you don't get evaluated every few months or followed on a weekly basis by a team of therapists but I know at worst you're right at normal. No worries from me.

Plus (ssshhh don't tell), I think you're a little ahead.

Anyway, you love to dance, fall down when you don't get your way, and basically are toddling / running now all over! You love scribbling pictures and eating crayons still and anyway, just so I don't forget, here are some skills I'm going to try to foster in you since you are ready for a challenge or two.

Beads in a bottle.
Coins in slot.
Kicking.
Body Parts.
Throwing a ball.
More doodling with crayons.
Stacking small square blocks.

Now I shouldn't forget!
http://library.med.utah.edu/pedineurologicexam/html/18month.html

Happy Birthday! Just some stuff off the top of my head...

2011-06-25T22:34:00.000-07:00

Little Miss Mary, how did you get to be so big so fast?

Sorry this post is belated; you turned 1 a week ago Wednesday.

You are the biggest little sweetie with the cutest kissable cheeks.

Let's see some of the stuff you are up to...

You love your sister and are BFFs. You hold hands and dance at the hint of music or when you're out on the sidewalk you reach for her hand so you can walk together. You adore Josie, so much.

You are enjoying all kinds of foods mostly if you are allowed to feed yourself. You still love to nurse and have no intention of slowing down just yet. You're getting pretty wiggly during which and too smart -- sometimes you want to help yourself to a snack.

You are obsessed with shoes. You love everything about them and carry them around as your favorite possession and hold your feet out for me to put shoes on and try on mine whenever you can. I don't care how grouchy or upset you can be, if I bring out a pair of shoes, those tears dry up immediately and you get a big goofy grin. Silly.

You can color with crayons, pick blueberries, run wobbly around the house.

Your speech is astounding. You can mimic every sound I can say. You say dog a lot and like to squeal at the top of your lungs. You are incredibly smart. You give kisses and haven't figured out that kissing-smack-sounds are make with your lips so you mimic the exact sound with a click of your tongue and lean in and give me, Daddy, and big sis kisses pretty frequently.

You love tutus, puppies, brushing your hair.

You are all about puzzles and shape sorters. You are incredibly inquisitive and go around signing "what" or "why" with your hands at various things.

You're down to one nap now :( In the afternoon around 2pm. You and Jo love to bounce and run around on the bed prior to your nap.

You love crawling up the stairs and have begun trying to walk up on your feet holding on to the railing.

I have no clue how tall you are bc we missed your 1 year check up (sorry but you look pretty healthy to us). But you weigh 23 lbs. Josie is 26. Almost catching her, but I do think you slowed down on the weight gain. You're still gorgeously chunky despite all your running around after sis.

What else... you love Popsicles, baby dolls (you are already such a cute little mommy), and tackling balloons.

You finally like the beach and going over the waves in Mommy's arms. Not so sure about sand yet.

You are very careful about being messy.

You are getting over stranger anxiety and letting more family members hold you, finally.

And your eyes are still blue!!!!!

All my love, little beauty, little girl, my Mary

Party pics:

Dexterity at 10 Months Old

2011-05-03T15:58:00.000-07:00

Like your Dad turned and said to me today,

There's really nothing Mary does now that surprises me.

Yesterday, we thought was pretty cool, you pointed to a lizard crawling on the window. You thought he was pretty funny. And just now, you were pushing buttons with your index finger. Pretty awesome seeing how pretty sure that comes later...

You'd make a really great 14 month old by the way.

Happy Easter Little Toddler

2011-04-24T08:23:00.000-07:00

10 months old and toddling all over? How bout walking over to and putting your chubby leg over a ride-on toy, sitting and pushing yourself across the room? How bout you walk more than crawl now? Yep, check, check, check. Where did my crawler go!? My baby is growing up too fast.

You have 4 upper teeth now, still only 2 on the bottom. We really need to do some pictures before you, ya know, get your drivers license and move to Denver or something. Course, thankfully that's age-regulated. Whew.

One of your favorite activities is car seat surfing. You probably have outgrown riding in it at this point, it's an infant carrier, but anyway, you stand in it and rock it with your legs and never lose your balance.

I'm pretty sure you never fall in general unless me or Daddy bump into you or Josie pushes you over. You get into the craziest predicaments and still manage to get down / out / un-pretzel somehow.

As for food, you had your first french fry about a week ago and did so well with it. Actually I'm pretty sure you ate at least 2, but you eat all but the bit clenched in your fat, lil hand then open your hand and it falls to the ground. hehe.

You also matched your shoes the other day, which I'm not even sure Josie could do. You were playing with your shoe on the ground, then you looked up and either saw or remembered where it was and crawled to it with your other shoe in hand. There's a lot of toys and clutter (distraction and obstacles) on our floor, so this is pretty amazing.

Also, you crawled up the slide at the park last week. Forget the little slide you climbed up at 7 months. This one was 6 ft high and spiral and you had BabyLegs on -- so you couldn't even use your knees, just hands and feet. No trouble, WHATSOEVER. And then you got to the top and repelled down systematically.

I told Dad we will need to pick your future ~~career~~ sport carefully because whatever it is you will most likely excel. You already are insanely dominative and stubborn. And obviously, you are coordinated like crazy-go-nuts. Muscle-tone is awesome. I just pray you stay healthy and continually strong and brave. Love you little-miss-10-months-already :)

April Update -- walking (a little)

2011-04-06T07:16:00.000-07:00

Well Ms Mary! You took your first couple steps this past week at 9 months. You can stand by yourself for practically forever and often do while you stand and play on your feet, you go from sit to kneel to stand with no effort. Your balance is amazing and your muscle tone is awesome. You'd be walking if you were just a bit more confident, and little by little I see you taking a step here to something or turning around without holding on to take a step and then you realize what you are doing and sit. Mostly we have luck with you walking outside. You don't like the concrete (oh or the kitchen tile, which is how Josie was too) and so you will gladly walk the perimeter if there's anything to pull up on. Otherwise if I take just one hand you will unsteadily parade around wobbling a little.

You also are coming along in understanding language. It's always funny to me to see you around older kids who are at your gross motor level and they respond to stuff so easily; I think, are we behind and then I have to remind myself -- well actually we are a couple months younger so yes, we are behind. haha.
You definitely understand your name, no problem and always respond to it which is comforting to see. And I am 90% confident you know Josie, Momma, and Dada. You would probably know nursing if we called it anything. You know "No" for sure. Not that you always listen, but you start to crawl to or mess with an object and I will say NO and you sit up and start to go to something else. At least you've started this lately. You know "more" but no actual signing just yet though we've started, we're not pushing it so much.

Speaking of nursing you just came over and whined to nurse and are happily eating now. You are starting to develop a slightly demanding temperament which makes sense bc you are 9 months now and practically toddling and also bc you're my kid. Why would you not be stubborn and determined?

You had your 9 month check up about a week ago -- 80% for height and 80% for weight. 55% for head cir. Perfect if you ask me. Big, strong, healthy! I think it's funny Josie's head cir is always right at 50% and so is yours but Josie is always around the 3% for ht and wt and you are equal in ht and wt too just at the other end of the scale.

You LOVE grown up food. You see an apple and you get mad and tantrum and bounce up and down and scream for it. So we always have to get your applesauce. Which you like, but not as much as apples. You love bananas and do very well with them. I just give you a huge chunk and you eat it til it's just a small bit of mush. You pretty much will eat anything, at least the first few bites. You're not too excited over strained peas or green beans, but then, who could be? That'd be a sign of a really strange kid I think.

You still have 4 all-the-way-in teeth but you can see about 3 more uppers. And you bite me with them (though only when nursing to sleep). Which I should note is not as bad as your pinching me with your little fingers which you still do (all the time).

You can crawl up stairs no sweat. You also can lift your leg over objects to crawl in, but you often underestimate what you are crawling into and get stuck halfway when it's taller than you.

You also have an obession with playing with the laptop. It's so alluring.

Oh and earlier this week, Monday, you pulled my coffee cup over and it was completely full and it spilled EVERYWHERE and you got mad and threw a tantrum as soon as I picked you up to clean you up. Likewise, Tuesday you pooped the worst poop ever all over the living room rug and were playing in it (for the 5 seconds I had you out of view) and threw a tantrum when I removed you from that as well. Man that was really a disaster. Took me an hour to clean up and then I rested and realized I still had to scrub the carpet stain, mop the kitchen and bathroom floors and scrub the shower.

Speaking of sensory play (ew just kidding), we did an April / Easter sensory bin with artifical lillies and paper grass and plastic eggs and baby chicks. You love the plastic eggs. You love exploring and discovering. It's getting harder to entertain you. Although you LOVE your sister and she usually does a great job keeping you busy.

Waving?!

2011-02-28T14:21:00.000-08:00

Sweet girl, mom is clueless. I have been watching you open and close your little hands all day and it never dawned on me you were performing a milestone. Haha. You are totally waving. I just asked Josie's OT this morning about your clapping bc you haven't done any in a while (despite me freaking out and singing tons of songs to get you to try). You were just working on something new! Oooh.

Tons of waving practice is coming in handy apparently. I barely need to suggest things to you though and you nail em. Smart cookie!

The tea olives smell goregous out and we've been getting in so much fresh air and trips to the park.

Keep up the fun.

love you!
--mom

P.S. You just saw me looking at you and you waved. But ya know it could be a variant on asking to be picked up, as Josie does that all the time. Hmmmm... not sure -- regardless you are so genius.

Surreal

2011-02-16T11:48:00.000-08:00

Let me tell you, healthy babies are a piece of cake. Heck, they're easier than that -- they're a nice, surreal cake smoothie or something. No effort required. They eat, they poo, they burp, they say dadada and mamama with no effort. They get over colds appropriately. They are stimulated by the appropriate stimulants and they initiate oral exploration and generally want to find out about people and things. They sit straight when you sit them, they do things the first time they try it sometimes, and know how to fall and how to catch their balance. The crawl on time, or even ahead of schedule. They want to walk. They don't need therapy 4 times a week. They look chunky, healthy and the right size and people don't offend you when they guess their ages. They nurse and enjoy food, right off the bat! They don't need multiple operations or come missing pieces or parts. Totally, completely, healthy babies are surreal and crazy and amazing and I am loving it. And this is just off the top of my head lol.

Mary is blowing my freaking mind.

Clapping and advanced things

2011-02-14T09:34:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's 2011! Right now every body's napping while dad's at work. We had an interesting loss of electricity this morning but glad the power is back on in time for lunch.

So Miss Mary, we just had an unofficial eval earlier this morning, and at worst your development is about a month ahead around 8.5-9 months. At best you score in at 14 months developmentally. Just so you know, you are not old enough to score this well. You are still 7 months (well technically only for today though, you'll be 8 months old tomorrow).

We are definitely very proud! Your gross motor is your best but fine motor is awesome too. You do amazing things like stand unassisted (your record is 3 seconds, then you realized you weren't holding on), walk when we hold both your hands (I tried getting you to walk while holding only 1 hand but you wouldn't try it). You clap and have a nice primitive pincer grasp (you can pick up anything as long as you can rest your hand or wrist on a surface).
And last Friday you clapped for the first time :) :) :) soooooooo cute!
When you lose your balance standing unassisted you sit down quickly so as not to fall instead of falling. And sometimes you think you can walk, and you just turn to go and fall on your face. You will probably... most definitely... pretty sure be an 8 month walker if not then definitely by 9 months for sure. Which really blows my mind. We JUST did this with Josie! And she didn't clap til she was just over a year! I don't know what to think. But this is definitely easier. You don't need me as much, but it's ok. Mommy gets to watch :)

We didn't eval speech. I will probably ask Janet (or maybe Auntie Robyn) for some guidelines just because I am very unversed in normal speech progression . But sometimes I cannot tell you and Josie apart when you both babble. Your voice is deeper and while you have more consonants than she does, you stick to single string babbling. Da da da da da ba ba ba ba baaa. And little screeches. And lots of maaa maa mo mo mo mo mos. :) Loving it.

You can do Ls and Ms and Ps and Fs (Whoa!?!!!!) and Ws and Bs and Ds and Gs and Ns and Vs and Yas.

For vowels you have all manner of A sounds, O sounds, Es ... you aren't much limited actually. Your range is now better than your sister so hopefully you can push her along.

Other than this, you are delightful and sweet. Of course.

You still prefer baby oatmeal to purees but you like solids like gerber puffs and pizza crusts (you did AWESOME actually) and cookies. You still nurse as often as ever so you are just incredibly fat now. So it's probably good you get in some more mobility ... exercise :)

You love swinging in the blanket and copying you sister the best of course. You adore her. Over all, so excited how you are blossoming. Autopilot!

Slow down!!!

2011-01-28T13:47:00.000-08:00

Dearest Little Mary,

You are 7 1/2 months old and you are CRAZY! You think you are at the very least 9 months.

You pulled up to a stand at 6 1/2 months old. I screamed and you fell over. You repeated and have been pulling up on everything (including your sister) constantly since.

You have gotten over your stranger anxiety. Everyone says its supposed to hit around now, but yours was at its worst about 4 or 5 months old (back in Oct) and has subsided. I don't get it. I mean, if you see me leave the room you scream like crazy, but you will now let others hold you (yey!).

You have a PERFECT pincer grasp. Like PERFECT. Like you can pick up anything without any effort.

You can stand for a second or 2 unassisted and as of last week you walked down the entire length of the couch AND back. You started using your push toy and walking behind it, though you don't always remember to walk behind it.

I love that you are so advanced but it's sooo weird. And I will miss your legs being so chunky. And I hope nothing will turn up wrong with you (bc I am always paranoid like that in general).

You have been reaching for me to pick you up (yey so cute!) and you giggle like crazy when Josie plays with you or even looks at you.

Your favorite game is peek a boo and taking things out of a box.

You have 2 teeth. You can see your uppers but they stopped coming down which is fine by me, bc I got a first bite and it really hurt!

You got your first cold last week. You screamed at me and would not let me put you down for 1 second no matter what I did or what you were doing for about 5 days straight. It was not fun. But you got over the cold really well considering it just about knocked out me and Josie.

What else? You are pretty chunky. I have no clue how big; we should weigh you soon. I am still hopelessly behind in shots for you bc insurance is once again cancelled but we'll get caught up somehow.

Right now you have a poopy diaper -- just noticed. SO that will be the end!

Beginner crawling, sitting like a pro, big girl bath, 1st Christmas, 1st tooth!

2011-01-06T19:58:00.000-08:00

What a terrible blog post title. Oh well. So Christmas week you really started moving forward with crawling. So early! Only technically 6 1/2 months old. I have 2 therapists, PT and OT who confirmed you are advanced for your age in motor skills and Speech says you are right on target with your baby sounds. I love it. You are on auto pilot and all I have to do is sit back. I can't believe it. Healthy babies are a snap compared with special needs delays. I know however, while your milestones come so early and so easy, we really got to celebrate Josie's so we're good all around, equally, doubly blessed!

Today you crawled under the baby swing -- over the first bar, under it completely, nibbled on the tag a bit, then over the second bar, then across the room. You instantly learned to sit from a crawling position, first try, and your stability is honestly better than Josie's. You look all over and when you begin to wobble you catch yourself with your awesome muscle tone. You make everything look so so soo easy. I think you have better balance than I do already.

My little Mary Therese. So sweet. Biggest baby grin, only likes mom and dad to hold you, and so adventurous and aware. You scope out a room top to bottom when we visit anything new.

My great breastfeeder. I know a lot of moms have mixed feelings over breastfeeding, but after going through what we went through with Josie and the feeling of loss particularly in that area, I have to say, I am IN love with breastfeeding much to my glee and gratefulness. I love feeding you so much and I love how you need me and want me when you bump your head, you cry until I pick you up then the cries die down suddenly as you snuggle into me suddenly forgetting your ouch. I love it but...

we did start solids. You're not too keen. We've tried all sorts of things anyway. Yogurt, oatmeal, cream of wheat, peas, squash, sweet potato. You don't seem to hate them per se, you just think its weird. But hey, it doesn't get into your nasal cavity when you eat so I'm sure you will love it shortly, no surgery needed! That I am so happy for.

Still a solid sleeper and such an easy baby. An absolute joy :)

Raspberries and Rocking

2010-12-18T11:50:00.000-08:00

Miss Mary, you are so precious. Your daily hobbies include rocking on your knees, sometimes crawling backwards or like an inchworm, blowing many, many, many raspberries, and bopping around. Oh and of course huge, contagious smiles.

I think you are gonna be crawling by Christmas next week. Daddy thinks it'll be a little longer, but I think you're gonna take off any second. You try to crawl already, and you have the strength, but you just haven't figured out the rhythm. That's why you look like an inchworm. But you still can get to whatever toys you want and can take off any direction rolling in seconds. You love to try to crawl toward your big sis most of all.

The past week you tried sweet potato and squash. You hated both! You also tasted an apple slice and sucked on an ice cube -- those on the other hand you are a big fan of surprisingly. We missed your 6 month shots bc of Josie's dental cleaning, but we are going Tuesday to start to catch you up. I can't wait to see your measurements. You are huge and so healthy. I still can't believe you sit so easily and are so so soo ready to crawl. Your muscle tone is amazing.

You also picked up Jo's very heavy sippy full of water and lifted it to your mouth and started sucking. I was pretty amazed since you've never even tried a bottle yet and you knew how to get it to your mouth. You were however very surprised when water came out. You didn't really seem to enjoy that.

You also ripped the cord from my scapular the other day. When nursing you somehow always get your toes ahold of it and clinch it in your little fist. I love watching the little crucifix rest on your hand as you drift asleep -- but the other morning you yanked it and I had to get another. I can't wait to get you and Jo your own! Also I should note, your current favorite teether is a wooden, children's rosary; I don't think the Blessed Virgin minds. At least I hope not. :)

All and all I am amazed at how quickly and easily things come to you without any help from me. You have the most pleasant, sweet temperament; everyone always notices you despite of your quietness -- you are always grinning and have the most gorgeous soft, chubby cheeks. I know I am very blessed.

All my love,

Mom!

My 5 Month Old Little Bean Bag

2010-11-28T17:11:00.000-08:00

Let's see Little One. Right now you are falling fast asleep on my lap nursing. You are a great eater, but we still haven't tried any table food just yet. You seem pretty content with mom. As soon as you hit 6 months we'll try some stuff, though I have a feeling you will want it more than I will want you to have it; I am really very content to nurse. Today a lady at the store said you had beautiful eyes and at mass you always make people grin. You are the happiest, smiliest 5 month old there ever was.

You've been sitting now for a little while. Not sure when you first became able to sit because the first time I tried sitting you up, you just sat there looking at me as if to say, what like it's hard? But your sister was twice your age when she finally sat. Which just goes to prove my theory that fat babies have it easy. You just plop down like a little bean bag and there you sit. You don't realize it yet though I don't think because you will turn suddenly to see something and loose your balance -- BUT I am ecstatic to say that you naturally are already putting your hands out to catch yourself, to the front, sides, and even the back sometimes. What else can you do? Roll like a tornado. You have been getting up on all four already but you have no coordination with that yet and fall on your little face :) which is cute. OH and of course, you are already army crawling -- but only to get to your sister who you love beyond all else. I think the ranking is something like this 1) Josie 2) Elmo, 3) Nursing.

Anyway my sweet, lots of love,
Mom

Milestones

2010-11-21T18:47:00.000-08:00

Dear Little Mary girl,

You are amazing! You roll over like a pro and you are only barely 5 months old. You can get from one side of the room to the other in minutes flat, lol. Plus tonight you are pushing up on your arms -- and you're half asleep too. Pretty impressive.

Also, not to be ignored, at 6pm mass tonight, while we were quietly kneeling during the consecration you learned that you could blow raspberries. Well done. Very cute. I couldn't help laughing. Now that you've learned you can teach your sister!

This week you were baptized! Finally! Fr Eddie drove from Crawfordville and did the ceremony of this wonderful sacrament. Welcome to the church baby girl. So nice to be in a church for it rather than a NICU waiting on emergency transport. You were a little grumpy as it was close to 8pm by the time it started. You were so beautiful in your dress and bonnet -- really sweet. Very pretty. You didn't even cry when the water was poured over your head or when you were anointed (surprisingly). You were incredibly interested in the thing they pour water with. I think its supposed to be a clam shell but to be honest I didn't look at it besides noticing that it was golden. As Fr Eddie passed by your face over your head you tried to throw yourself backward just to get a look. This made us all giggle because it was so adorable of course!

Auntie Robyn and Uncle Derek were your godparents. They didn't hold you besides a couple quick screaming pics; you just don't like anyone but mama to hold you. It's ok with me.

After we went back to your Grandma W's and we had some random stuff and a very sad cake that didn't cool long enough bc I ran out of time. It was a lot of fun and Josie had a blast playing with everyone as she is a definite social butterfly. You kept to daddy's arms.

All in all a wonderful way to watch you grow and see you initiated into the church by the sacrament of baptism. Right now you are playing with a zebra's tail on your floor play mat. And now you are pushing straight up on your arms again and wishing you could get your legs coordinated enough to propel you forward. So ready to go!

Elmo and Mobility

2010-11-16T08:00:00.000-08:00

Dear little Mary,

You are far too mobile for 5 months but I don't think you care what I think. You can roll long distances now. You absolutely refuse to sleep on your back and you reach out and grab whatever you are interested in without any trouble. You're pretty amazing. You also are in love with Elmo just like your big sister. No matter what is going on, you hear his voice and you stop what you are doing and stare at the big blob of red monster the entire time he's up there -- even while nursing -- which for the record, you are way too interested in every tiny sound to pay much attention to lately anyway. You make up for that during sleep though. You have to eat all night, but snuggling with you is one of my favorite things in the world. You are starting to do the seperation anxiety thing your sister never did but that I've read about. You barely even want Daddy to hold you. Your baptism is scheduled for Thursday the 18th with Fr Eddie, so hopefully you do not scream too much or for too long being held by someone else. You love water though and baths are your favorite. Mommy has given you licks off my spoon of a few things (lemon ice mainly) which isn't the "correct" way to go about first feeding, but Josie's entry to the world of feeding was nothing but unconventional so I figure, it can't matter too much. I am NOT starting you on infant cereal. That stuff has the worst texture. I will probably give you some cream of wheat depending on your iron levels, but mommy and daddy both love that so you might too!

Anyway, got to go as you are rolling across the floor and its just a matter of time before you find a cheerio.

Love Mommy <3

Birth Story 6-15-10

2010-11-07T18:06:00.000-08:00

Poor little Mary, already over 4 months old and I have neglected your blog. That's ok. I can remember very clearly what happened the day you were born.

I was supposed to be induced at 41 weeks. The pregnancy was incredibly healthy, my amniotic fluid looked awesome, baby was moving and showing signs that she was happy. Normally 42 weeks is the maximum gestation allowed, and although completely miserable, I was fully ready to have you out, I was also fully prepared to go the whole 42 weeks to make sure you were ready and healthy; however my OB was going out of town and wanted to schedule you to come at 41 weeks. The day I was scheduled to come in, I called and canceled: I could stick it out one more week (and you were so incredibly happy in there).

I wanted you out nonetheless, so I went to Fr Mike Nixon's first mass and had him bless you with the intention of a healthy birth and that you'd please come out on your own already. The doctor's office called to reschedule the induction at 42 weeks exactly, a Wednesday.

Monday night, around 10pm, I knew that I was going to have you soon. I was on FB (of course) and nearly got knocked off my chair with a strong contraction. Owwwww. However after a full day taking care of a toddler, we were pooped, so I said, ok baby you better be coming, but not til morning.

I laid in bed and no joke, every 20 minutes throughout the night I had a horribly crampy contraction. I called my doula and she said because I had an OB check up in the morning to go and see what he said after he checked me. In the morning I was 10 minutes apart and 100% sure you would be coming within the next 24 hours. I went into my OB's office and the ultrasound tech said she was sure he was going to admit me. I went in, got undressed, waited forever for the OB and guess what -- he didn't even check me.

I told him, "I am pretty sure the baby's coming."
He said "Well you're going to be induced tomorrow. I don't need to check you."
And so I said, "Yes well the contractions are about 10 minutes apart. I think the baby is coming soon. Today."

Still we left without being checked. I called the doula and she was pretty convinced now was not the time either (and she lived good hour away so she didn't want to make the trip for a false alarm when I was being induced the next morning).

Anyway, because I was so sure I'd be admitted, we had dropped Josie off with my mom. Since we were kidlet free, I wanted to see a movie. Toy Story 3 was due out any day... however it was still a few days from being out (UGH) so we went to see Shrek 3 instead... or 4 or whatever and it wasn't that good. But it was okay because during the movie my contractions went to 5 minutes apart. After the movie I called the doula and said I thought the baby was coming but I wasn't entirely sure since it felt different from the contractions I had with Josie (which I was induced by having my water broken).

Leaving the Tallahassee Mall I told Brian I was pretty sure we should get to triage. Brian said, "well didn't you want to get a soft pretzel from the other mall?" I of course did and since no one else was convinced I was having a baby, I figured I wasn't really in labor. My doula told me to keep walking so we drove to the other mall. I was in a LOT of pain and doubting myself incredibly.

We got to Governor's Square and I am lucky I didn't drop the baby there in front of Auntie Annes.

I could barely get IN the mall I was in so much pain but it was literally over 100 degrees out so I made it inside. I could not however make it to the pretzels so I told Brian to run to get it. He left me standing by the railing outside of Macys. I looked everywhere for a place to sit but the only bench anywhere was surrounded by a group of young black guys who were trying very hard to look really cool with their pants on the ground etc lol. Regardless, I limped over and sat on the corner of their bench and they all gave me the weirdest look ever and walked off obviously peeved at me. Then I proceeded to let one tear stream down my face. No one thought I was in labor but me and I didn't know what to do to convince everyone and I figured I was probably just overreacting or something. Pathetic I know.

So we made it back outside into the car and I told Brian to take me to triage to which Brian asked, "Do we have time to go pick up diapers at CVS to drop off with your mom."

I think I burst out crying at this point. "Take me to triage, now!" And Brian said something along the lines of, are you really sure because you don't want to go in and just sit around and stall labor etc. But being a good husband, we went to triage and I ate my pretzel in between contractions which were now 3-5 minutes apart.
Brian called the doula to say, maybe she should get down here. The doula said to let her know what triage says.

We got to the hospital and I barely could walk.We got to the counter and surprise, I had to refill out all the same paperwork I had previously done online. The lady checking me in at the counter was acting obviously annoyed at my lack of attention to her while filling out paperwork. I had to keep stopping every form and would stand and brace myself silently through the contraction and she kept snapping with me, "Uh hello? Do you need the date again? just sign this" etc. All I wanted to do was sit down.

They had me sit and wait for what felt like an eternity in the waiting room, Brian said it was 5 minutes. He went to get me a drink from the vending machine and I had already been taken back by the time he got back. I tried to hide the fact that the contractions were coming on top of each other pretty quick because I'm pretty sure people were looking at me.

Finally they called me back to pee in a cup and change into a gown inside triage. I could hardly walk and they wanted me to go into a bathroom with no chair -- nowhere to hang my clothes and undress by myself. I was at this point having a LOT of trouble standing. I burst into tears. Somehow I got the gown on and waddled down to the bed. Triage was oddly quiet and empty -- about 6pm on a Tuesday. The nurse asked if I thought I was having contractions. I said, I sure hope so. She checked me and said, "Girl you are a good 7 cm. That baby will be here in a couple hours." I got the biggest smile in spite of myself, Thank GOD. Tell the doula to get her butt down here NOW. They started an IV for antibiotics since I was Strep B positive.

The doctor oncall was a really lovely lady OB I had never met. I loved her. Mostly because she believed I was in labor. I told her how her colleague had not even checked me that morning (about 7 hours earlier) even though I told him I was sure I was about to have the baby. Of course all the nurses got a huge kick out of that. Everyone told me I handled pain really well. I think I remember other terms like, rockstar and badass. We were joking around and having a good time up until I was wheeled in the room and then I felt like I was literally climbing a wall. At this point I thought an epidural sounded REALLY good. And WHERE THE HELL was my DOULA? I totally blame my doula. I was 9.5 cm and she was not there so I said, screw it can you give me somethin for pushing still? They said, not a full epidural but something. I said thank you very much. They gave me something and the doula made it in as the anesthesia was being administered.

She still helped pass the time as we sat around not in pain waiting to push. My labor slowed with the epi just in time to get the 2nd dose of antibiotics they told me I probably wouldn't have time for. As it started I said I felt as though it was time to push. They checked and it was. I pushed for like 20 minutes (sooo much better than the 2 hrs pushing out Josie LET me tell you). My water broke like 2 seconds before Mary crowned. Everyone was saying, she's already pink and she's not even out yet.

She came out and didn't cry but they said, she's fine she's breathing so well and so pink it doesn't matter. She still isn't much of a crier. She was chunky and beautiful, 8 lbs 1 oz. really long but forgive me I forget the number at the moment. Late Tuesday night, June 15th 2010.

Mary you were BEAUTIFUL from the second I laid eyes on you!

I held you close to me skin to skin and within a couple seconds you had latched all by yourself. You literally picked your head up off of my chest and dropped it down and latched without any help in one try. The doula said she's never seen anything like it. She said she's seen the videos where babies latched themselves but never so quickly. You knew exactly what to do. And I couldn't stop look at you. You were so amazing.

After that they did all the checking and measuring and I was just stunned, in awe, and exhausted. I kept asking for a sandwich. I was STARVING. Someone had promised me a sandwich and I kept asking everyone. No one gave me a sandwich until I got settled onto the next floor and asked someone up there and they got the nurse from the delievery floor to bring me up one since it was her duty. haha. I didn't care I was so hungry.

And you nursed, piece of cake, all night (I even fell asleep holding you while you nursed, don't tell). I didn't let you go except for others to hold you.

I remember particularly everyone holding you and how excited they were, and Grandpa W held you the longest and then when my Uncle Mike came in to hold you, Grandpa asked if he could take you back and hold you some more.

And you checked out so healthy with the doctors. Pulse ox 96%. Rosy and pink.

Well that is your birth story my dear. Textbook straightforward and beautifully perfect! You don't know how relieving it was to finally be one of the moms to walk out of the hospital with their newborn, so happy.

37 weeks

2010-05-12T21:14:00.000-07:00

I'm so bad at updating.

Yikes I'm 37 weeks. I can't believe it, and I'm not remotely ready yet. Don't get me wrong, I'm ready to hold her, see her, kiss her, not be pregnant anymore -- but have I got the NB clothes out and washed them? Nope. I don't have my car seat yet. Oops. I don't even have any hospital bags packed and Josie's especially needs to be packed.

I'm getting nervous. I keep teetering between really just wanting to get this over with and being afraid because I know after you transition over there's no going back. Before Josie was born my life was normal and full of joy and then she was born and my life literally fell apart. So I keep telling myself it'll be ok. Not going to go through that again. But I have to make a very conscious effort to adjust my mood. I think I'm afraid to let myself bond too. Don't get me wrong, I'm addicted to her but at the same time, I keep thinking, wonder what's going to happen to make the bottom drop out THIS time. I hate feeling like that. Still making that positive effort.

Symptom-wise, I've been having crazy braxton-hicks off and on daily for like 2 weeks now (and prior to that but not as regularly). Sometimes I think they must be real contractions, but I'm not 100%. I'm such a doubtful person, I'm afraid I'm going to keep doubting myself until she's practically here and there will be no way my doula will make it in time. She's an hour away as it is.

Life has been kinda crazy for me lately. Well crazy for all of us. Brian's gone 90% of the day so Josie is missing him terribly and being cranky and poor Brian is going to get burnt out. He job hops, trying to please everyone, goes to school, comes home does his homework and then tries to show me he's still here for me by unloading the dishwasher or something and by then it's 1 am and I'm grouchy anyway and we just go to bed. So for him, its bad. Me, I am getting no socialization and struggling between nesting to sheer exhaustion and giving up because I feel useless against it all anyway. Josie is sweet as can be but her feeding issues are killing me. The retching, screaming, wriggling around while I try to vent her and relieve her while she tries to pull the tube out and kick it out of my hand (while full to the brim of stomach contents) is way too much stress for anyone. It's bad enough to have your child in pain but not to be able to do anything. Then add fear of the button being pulled out and having to deal with all those implications plus just trying to physically wrangle her down and try to soothe her... it's like supermom the engineer who has to manage the medical, mechanical, technical, emotional, physical ramifications plus my back is KILLING me and I'm leaning over her and in weird contortions and honestly, crying, because it's awful to see her like that and to realize that's just how life is now -- it's not normal and I'm all alone doing it for the time being and that's a lot of responsibility. Oh shoot -- this needs to be on Josie's blog. I knew it'd be difficult to figure out what post goes where. Oh well. But yep that's me today in a nutshell.

Mary is very responsive. A shadow makes her kick like crazy. Sound and she kicks like crazy. She jumps when a door slams. I had Josie on my lap tonight and Mary wiggled her way from one side of my stomach to the other where she had room. I thought that was cool. Not that there's much room. I measured 38 weeks at the 37 week appointment and I was only 36 weeks and 6 days!

She's coming. I really honestly think within a week or so. I feel it. But then again it would just figure for me to endure this pregnancy as long as possible and have the baby come during Brian's first exams around the week of the 24th. It's so weird to be on this side of it and not know. Everything is so unknown.

Well this I do know. I am sore as crap. Second pregnancies, at least this one, are hard. I hurt everywhere, not to complain too much but really. And she is getting bigger and bigger -- Dr Fron -- who we ran into at PT today (weird but cool) called she'd be a 7 pounder...whatever that means...I'm thinking 7 lb 10 oz or a little bigger. And kinda long. Honestly I don't care as long as she has a complete roof to her mouth and a working heart. And I really want her to stay with me and not need to visit the NICU. I'd also like (while I'm making this wish list) to not tear or for her to get stuck -- to NOT be induced, or have high blood pressure or a c-section. And praying quite often for everything to just go smoothly without complication and safely for me and her. And for her to be a her and not be an oops it's really a boy! Anyone else ever have that fear?

Anyway dear Mary, I love you. Be safe. Apparently I'm GBS positive so I will need antibiotics, so praying too that will be a non-issue. Dr Fron said yesterday that my pregnancy is "picture perfect" -- he actually said, "Your pregnancy couldn't be more picture-perfect. I'm going to get you to teach a class to my other patients on how to be pregnant."

Ha. Ha.

I know that's bc my weight is right at the recommended average -- 27 lbs so far. My iron is super. I have never been anemic though. I stopped taking my prenatals (bad) about a month ago, so oh well. Not bc I chose to or anything, just haven't remembered or cared to be overly faithful with it. I am more concerned to be getting my fish oil and vit B. I only take the prenatals for the iron generally anyway. I think too much vit A had something to do with Josie -- but then again that's a theory and no one will ever know. And besides they say it's not in the division of cells, but instead a defect with the egg or sperm from the start. God only knows.

Sorry Mary, off topic to Josie again. That's ok, you both are always on my mind equally at this point and I know I will love you both equally. I know it will be differently too but the same amount.

Anyway, no water retention -- least no noticeable swelling anywhere. My ankles are always skinny. No clue why. Hope they don't make me take IV fluids though bc that does make my feet swell, well it did with Josie but then I was going up and down stairs and on my feet like 48 hours straight after she was sent to Shands. I don't think I could be more exhausted even with a crying newborn and a special needs tot to tend to this time. But just praying if I go in to have the baby on a Sunday I have the baby before 7 Tuesday. That was crap. No one else I talk to had to go THAT long. I know it happens, but not to any of my friends -- not that I'd want them to of course, but I always wonder why it happens to be me sometimes.

But then again, I'm blessed. I know!

Hopefully we get things packed and ready soon. The first time we were ready and then had to wait 2 months for Josie to get outta Shands. So I think we have a false sense of time here. Plus I'm thinking if I don't do any prep maybe I won't have to go into labor... but then again, it's guaranteed she's coming sooner or later.

I can't pass TMH without a longing to meet her and just get this thing going. Waiting takes forever.

Oddly -- I am seriously excited to get off my feet and lay in a bed (albeit hospital bed that is too short for my long legs) and have people focus on me for at least a day or so. Take my temperature, ask if I feel ok, etc. I know it'll be all about the baby again as soon as she is born, and that's ok. But just a little mini reprieve from Josie's doctors and appointments and tube feedings and Sesame Street, OT, PT, ST, running around in the car and feeling guilty when I don't do everything. When I'm having the baby surely no one expects any of that, so I can't possibly be guilty. So I'm ready for just sitting in the bed holding a newborn -- even if I have to go through labor to get it and even if nursing ends up hurting. I'm pretty sure my nipple could get ripped off and I'm still just going to be ecstatic my baby has the ability to suck.

lol. I have such incredibly low expectations this time.

On the one hand I think, I bet this baby is gonna walk by 9 months and it's going to be INSANE, and then on the other I half hope she doesn't go too fast bc I'm conditioned to Josie's slow nature. Wondering what her personality will be like too. Jo is so laid back but stubborn but super sweet and affectionate. Mary what will you be like?

I asked Brian if he'd like to document any comments on this blog and he said, he predicts Mary will be a lot more "entergetic" than Josie was. Ha. Ha. Ha.

On blogs and religion (sort of)

2010-02-28T20:29:00.000-08:00

My titles never mean anything.

So I've been thinking how it may be difficult to keep a blog for each girl when so many things may intersect. But then tonight at mass (just thought of this) Father asked us to read each passion story from all of the gospels and compare them... so maybe these can be like the Wilmot Gospels (I say very lightheartedly -- this is no bible story). But hopefully that will not limit our beautiful children to a certain number up front. Brian and I offer our fertility back to God as a gift since it first is a gift from God -- co-creators with Christ for human life!? God is so unfathomably gracious and so many people throw away the gift! That said, I know sanity and frugality will come into great consideration as we try to shape this little family, but Josie has taught me so much and among the greatest things, how precious (and fragile) human life is and how God has all control.

See where we are intersecting already?

Anyway sweet little Mary-girl, today you slept in, not too much wiggling all day, and have woken up this past hour or so. Ob thinks you are head down (although he said that it didn't matter yet so much). But I really thought I felt you flip a couple weeks ago. This morning I thought how glad I was to not be pumping to be able to wear a normal bra for a few months because I plan on breastfeeding you for a long time and really often. Hopefully. And I hope I will not forget that resolution when I am sleep-deprived but still giving you night feeds later on. But right now, those prospects sound incredible. Can't wait.

I can't believe you are only months away from being born. You will be full term on MY birthday! May 18th. How fun!? Mommy will be 25.

I was thinking last night how busy the first 5 years of my 20s have been:
20: engaged to Daddy
21: married to Daddy
22: graduated FSU and conceived your sister Josephine Grace
23: Josie is born!
24: bought a house, conceived you, Mary-girl
25: (probably unless you get here even just a day before full term) meet Mary on the outside!

Busy!?!? But sooo wonderful. Mommy is so incredibly blessed.
Tonight I prayed a very Holy Spirit inspired prayer after communion about you Ms. Mary. I felt an awesome peace and connection with the Father and prayed that you would be very good. I have a lot of faith and hope in that prayer, and lots of faith and hope in you because God is sooooo very good!!!

Welcome little Mary Therese

2010-01-11T15:45:00.000-08:00

Today you are 20 weeks gestation and we found out you are a girl. I should have known. The story goes, shortly after we had Josie home from Shands, we were walking on a warm day at Tom Brown toward LHS. I said to Brian something like how grateful we are to Mama Mary for holding me through Josie's roughest beginning months and how I thought the novena to St Therese of Lisseux really helped; our intentions were heard and granted. We would be able to go on with the good hope of healthy babies, DNA wholly intact.

So I mentioned something, that I felt we were definitely going to have a boy next whenever that would be. But if it was a girl, born in May, we should name her after Mama Mary in gratitude for her prayers and St Therese for the middle name for interceding.

Well we started being open to life again as soon my depression began to subside and as I could emotionally handle the idea of being pregnant again. We weren't trying at first but my cycle was incredibly hard to follow and we figured that we would probably just be called crazy for conceiving so soon after bringing into the world such a "difficult" baby. But we didn't conceive. And we were sort of shocked. And a little sad. So the next month we decided to maybe be a little more open and see how it went. No baby again. So we decided we would continue being open and faithful and see where it went fully expecting to conceive shortly.

Six months later (from the start) and after 2 negative pregnancy tests, I didn't even realize I was late. I went to bed thinking, wow I'm a week late and didn't even notice. So the next morning without saying anything (girls who've had the disappointment of a negative pregnancy test will know why), first thing bright and early, I took the test. Minutes later I looked down and there it was. My results: one very dark pink line and one tiny, faint pink line slowly coming to view. We were pregnant.

Brian was getting dressed and I came out with a huge grin. Priceless reaction -- he asked, "What? Did you knock my toothbrush into the sink or something?" Nope and pulling him over to the bed, I told him and he grinned like me and the rest, well its been smooth sailing so to speak. The symptoms a bit heavier than with Josie, mainly a lot of migraines, migraine auras and nausea and of course the lovely round the clock "morning" sickness. But I am thankful for it because it could have been worse, subsided (and traded with the headaches) by the 2nd trimester, and even the migraines are getting milder into just sinus headaches. So I honestly can't complain. And besides, that's supposed to be a sign of a healthy pregnancy -- good hormone levels etc.

Anyway, so how should I have know it would be a girl? Well due June 1, I figured that was my chance to have a boy knowing full well though that second pregnancies usually deliever earlier than late. That would bring a girl in May. Mary Therese like we promised. I couldn't be more pleased.

Today we went for the 20 week ultrasound, Mary dear, and saw your 4 chambered heart, 1 lovely aorta and even all the main arteries that branch off. We got a little scared when it took awhile to find the pulmonary one, but it was there. We checked out your lips on the screen, lovely closeup, and they look smooth and full already. No clefts. And your face looks longer than Josie's but really poetically beautiful. I am going to be in trouble with such beautiful girls. Better get a brother in there soon to watch out for you for me.

Sister whined a little for me while I was getting the ultrasound. But daddy entertained her well with all sorts of distractions. I can't wait for you two to meet. You better always be good to each other, and when I say that I really mean you. I have a feeling things may come naturally and easier for you than your sister (well that and research) and I know I will always be able to trust you to protect and look out for your sister and she will always unconditionally love you. It feels so good to know I am bringing another little girl into the world. I pray for your holiness and a holy reservation and good prudence. I think St Gemma would be a good patron for you, but maybe someone else will make themself known. Who knows, you may have a sister Gemma in some years.

Well my Mary dear, God bless you and have fun in my belly. Labor is not really that fun, but oh how I look forward to meeting you on the outside. No going into shock or complications please. Grow healthy, strong and big. My good girl :)

Love,
Your mama.