Deep With It

TRUST ME!!!

2010-08-17T13:46:00.003-04:00

TRUST. What is life without it? How can you have success without it? Love without it? Miracles without it? Trust and faith are synonymous!

Releasing control is trust. Letting go of people, places and things is trust. Balance is trust. With every disappointment the only means to recoup is in TRUST.

Patience is a virtue. Let go and let God. Stop TRYING. Worrying solves nothing. Everything in due time.

So often we remind ourselves of all the cliches that are trust. Post great quotes on Twitter and our FB pages. Read awesome insights in books and magazines. Looking for the confidence and support from everything and anything around us. Grasping at whatever helps us to feel a little stronger. A little more confident. A little more occupied. Accomplished.

YOU know what its like to feel like your blowing in the wind. I know I do! Isn't it interesting how some will bask in it and be whimsical and others develop REST-LESS-NESSSS! I've done both. The older we get, the more responsibilities we have, the harder it seems to be whimsical. If we are not careful we forget to dance.

It's OK! All of this is ok. Sometimes, even during great strides we come to a lull that seems endless - that frustration of knowing what you want and not being sure of what the best next step is to set things in motion. EXHAUSTION. FEAR. In balance we need to be passive but aggressive in forward motion don't we? Even when we are happy we are searching and challenging ourselves. At least we SHOULD be! What is life without living, teaching, learning and giving. Along the way our needs are ALWAYS met, and we know it when we just remain GRATEFUL. Our happiness should not come from what we can say we have, or have done. No need for comparison, mind how much we care about what OTHERS think and expect of us. It's just a little trust in ourselves and in the plan for our greatness no matter the format.

Happiness should come from being who we are undeniably. Not smugly with no apologies, but THANKFULLY with no apologies.

Trust me ;-)

What's That Spring in Your Step???

2010-04-01T12:25:00.004-04:00

IT"S SPRING TIME BABY!!!

I woke up this morning thankful for my recent receptivity to my dreams. There has been a bunch of subconscious activity going on these nights, helping to clear things up and heighten my awareness....There's some NEWNESS goin on!

As for many, the past 3 year stretch has been TRYING times. Emotional, financial, physical. So many lessons learned. Growing pains. Rights of passage. Many moments were like handling a fish out of water - just hard to grip...difficult to manage under the circumstances! Then there is that familiar feeling of warmth from the bright light that is "just 'round the ben". A very familiar friend for most I hope, ain't it? It's only a decision to accept that comrade. I've come to appreciate that that friend should never cease to exist if we're committed to consistent progress, so I invite it to stay an infinite while. STAY around the corner and keep keepin us warm on our path!

It's an interesting time. I'm peepin my people, FB friends and all ;-)

Seems like everywhere I turn there is an abundance of busy energy grabbin folks up. Cheering folks up. Breaks coming left and right. New opportunities, new motivations, new loves, new hopes. I feel a new milestone, a new place opening up. Not sure what it is exactly, but there is certainly a new bridge being extended and I'm excited about crossing it. Clarity for what TRULY MATTERS. Every time you think you know....It's this gift of awareness that keeps maturing at the pace and perspective that's appropriate for our individual roles in this life. Inching toward COMFORTABLE NAKEDNESS. No image to LIVE UP to. Just OUR image. No smoke and mirrors, no mask, no facade. JUST you. JUST me. Quirky me. Not so good with the details but always workin on it me. Wishing I was more of this, less of that but I ain't no where close to suicidal over it me. Open minded, fair, proud, nonchalant whimsical, particular, solid with me ME. We're getting a little better at this e'ry day, no?
(If you ain't get on board homie!)

In appreciation for what the change of seasons brings, letting those March showers wash away the smut, the clutter, the bad attitude, the grudges, the resentment, the negative, the OLD and let this Spring sunshine harvest the new!

Cheers to that SPRING in our steps!

A Matter of Perspective

2009-12-28T10:19:00.003-05:00

I've had a situation with a relationship that challenges me. It's difficult to express the depth of it all without details and goodness knows I've never been good at being "surface". I've recently been in a position where I've felt I'd been asked or expected to choose in more ways than one; between friendships, value systems, responsibility, peace... It's very sensitive since it is a raw subject, and it stings both ways as I feel my decisions to stand by my values hurts someone who I love very, very dearly and interestingly enough, it also hurts me. It hurts me because it seems the very thing I believed I was loved for is the very thing I'm being reprimanded for. My values, decisions, and temperament is based on the very core of who I am and how I live. In my opinion it is what has made me a good friend and given me a peaceful, welcoming and accomplished existence in this life. It is what my character is built from. It is what I have always been proud of. It is all that I am. In entirety this is a disagreement of how each other handles themselves or has made decisions in a specific scenario. It is a difference of perspective.

A persons perspective is not just an opinion, it is a view point based on life experiences and mind set. Ultimately it is based on an individuals set of values. It is a persons character build that makes their perspective and it is not as black and white as wrong or right. Maybe like the comparison of Malcolm X and Martin Luther King Jr where a similar destination is intended but the fundamentals for achieving it are antonymous. I've never been much of a grudge holder or a fan of resentment and although I am disappointed by the awakening of this circumstance I will always have love and appreciation for the gift of friendship we were able to keep through such a significant stretch of time. I'm sorry for the hurt between us. I know that perspective is everything but love is omnipotent.

Cheers.

I'mma Always B An Around The Way Girl...

2009-11-05T13:41:00.003-05:00

Today was a laundry day.

Although the laundromat is next door I enjoyed my little trecks back and forth. It was cool to take in the sunny crisp brisk almost winter air. More than that, it was cool to reconnect with the 'round the wayness in this Jersey City Heights neighbor-hood I have adopted for the past 7 years. Surely at nearly 31 I can easily pass for a 17 year old when I'm rockin my afro in a tight puff, big hooped earrings, Dunks, baggy sweats and hooded sweater :-) I embrace it. What made me smile was the wobble out of my building with two stuffed laundry bags and a gigantic wholesale container of Tide (accidentally tossed my empty normal sized bottle). A young gentleman thug eagerly offers, "Can I help you with that"? Of course my pride answers, "No thank you, I'm good" with a big Kool Aid smile. He responds, "Your beautiful" and I thank him, again with the big Kool Aid...gotta love the round the way love!

I get started loading the machines when the electricity goes out...oh yeah, I'm around the way, lol. It quickly recovered itself and I carried on getting change and pouring fabric softener while somehow being entertained by a Spanish talk show blaring on the TV. You don't have to understand the words to know when a woman is scorned, tehe!

I tripped over a few kids who shoulda been in school....

Top it off with the gentleman dred who encourages me to slow down or I might hit a wall, then offers to help me fold LOL.

I'm the "good girl" next door from Far Rockaway, Queens. I know "Around the Way", but I forget it until a day like today.

Cheers to the "Hoods"!

It Ain't About You!

2009-09-30T11:16:00.004-04:00

This seems to be a reoccurring topic of discussion lately so I'mma speak on it :-)

Have you ever experienced this deep desire to be of help to someone and wondered why you were not "appreciated" for your attempts to "help" them?

Ahhhh yes! I've been there to some degree. You know the saying, "you can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved"? True isn't it? In the wrong context it can also be a little righteous...There's always a bit of self satisfaction that comes with assisting. It's that always present universal law of balance. What puts it off kilter is the righteousness that can come from the person offering assistance. That "if it wasn't for me" or "I'm just trying to help you out" attitude.

Not everyone that is "stuck" falls into the category of a person who doesn't want to be saved. Understand that people have their own process and it is ONLY about their due time. I promise you there has been a point where someone thought YOU were the one who didn't want to be saved! If you truly want to be helpful throw out the judgement and self concern and just be there. Passively. Offer your words of encouragement without pressing or expending your own energy. When words are placed they ALWAYS resonate, even if it takes three years and someone else repeating it and then getting credit for it when it finally clicks....haha! Don't ya love that lol!

Remember, each of us has their own path and it is a series of events that takes us to that place that "clicks" in our own DUE TIME. He's always on time =)

So if your looking to be of help to someone remember to be selfless by means of offering space and time with an occasional word or helping hand. Never give more than you can afford to loose or you'll have a hell of a hard time to give again!

Cheers to a helping hand!

FORGIVENESS...

2009-07-13T13:41:00.001-04:00

I advised someone I was once very close to that forgiveness would quiet the anger and resentment they felt toward another. I tried to explain that it didn't mean that they had to speak to that person again. Forgive them from a distance. Unfortunately, they didn't quite grasp what I was saying or perhaps they were uninterested in the effort that it would take to fogive. They didn't understand that forgiving was for their own benefit.

Ironically, I am writing today about my need to exercise the same theory toward the person I once advised it to. I realize that although I decided a long time ago to walk away and "let go", I haven't let go of it all. It's that damn resentment. Anyone who knows me knows I can't stand to be disrespected and quite frankly I have never in my life been as disrespected on so many occasions and so many levels as I had by this person. A recent event caused me to remember and reflect on the endless series of events that I eventually decided to free myself of.

Once my vision was clear the decision to move on was the easy part since I was moving on from a place that lacked anything in my favor. My recent reflection let me know I had to do something with that negative energy I found stashed away. I can't wait till I can remember without feeling such animosity. I thought that just because I understood the psyche behind the series of events, made the decision not to "wish karma" and have been doing my thing that I was good. Now I know for sure I have another step to take to complete my growth from the experience to make it worth it's weight. I know knowing this puts me ahead of the game. I'm just not sure what I actually "do" to close that door. How do you invoke forgiveness? Wish I could snap a finger! Maybe being conscious is the key and time is the cure?

Cheers...

Damn that Humble Pie!

2009-06-23T00:06:00.002-04:00

I have said openly that I have a superiority complex. Not that I think I am better than anyone, but I tend to chuckle at those that act as though they are better than me or anyone else. In this world EVERYONE has a gift, talent, strength and/or experience that exceeds their neighbor. The law of balance would assume that in the same right everyone has something to learn from their neighbor. I am reminded that this life is about give and take, helping and being helped. I am far from perfect with this but I am conscious of it. Sooo... I've been reminded to keep that little feisty ego in check.

I got re-dealt some humility the other day when a friend told me "you need to get over yourself"! Whoa. Truth is, I know there is truth to that statement. I immediately responded, "yeah, that is true..." lol! The topic of discussion was the ailment with my back that was diagnosed as Sciatica. I told him that I am prideful and having this kind of "weakness" as I described it, drives me crazy because I don't like asking for help with things that I feel I should be able to do on my own. I don't like to seem as though I am whining. It is obvious why he would retort that way after hearing me say something like that and I surely deserved it. I am definitely one of those people who isn't quick to ask for help. I am the kind of lady that will tell a man, "let me help you with that". The killer combo is that I can be rather stubborn as well. I pride myself on being ABLE.

You know how it feels when someone tells you, "it could be worse" or "there are so many people going through it too"? Don't so many of us feel "Yeah, that is all true and I'm thankful BUT I'm talking about what's going on with ME right now"! I guess the difficulty comes in balancing gratitude with ambition. Being able to be thankful in our quest for more...I decided to be thankful that this Sciatica is not at its worst and to do what I gotta do to weaken its symptoms and HUMBLY strengthen my core - physically, mentally and spiritually.

Cheers to humility!

Driven

2009-06-07T15:29:00.004-04:00

"You don't get in a T180 to be a driver. You do it because you are driven." - Speed Racer 2008

Yeah, I was watching Speed Racer on a Sunday morning...so what! LOL That's what Rex said to his younger brother Speedy, the aspiring racer. He wasn't racing just to race, he was racing to challenge himself, beat the evil doers and to stand up for his family. Take doctors for instance. Great doctors aren't doctors because that's what they went to school for and they figure they'll make a living that way. They are great because they believe in their purpose to fight disease, help families to be well and contribute to society.

You excel at what you do because you see your purpose in it. No matter what you choose to take a shot at in this life, it's gotta be with purpose. A reason. Our "why" takes us to a level of success that exceeds average expectations. You must be DRIVEN. In excess one might say all or nothing. Go hard or go home. The bottom line is that to be driven you've got to move past the fear of failure and move into the fear of mediocrity! How can we make it to the top of our mountain without failures? How else will you be able to gauge progress, gain growth and develop wisdom? Any of the "bests" will tell you so.

Someone told me that in life you do "the best you can". I had a hard time understanding why that statement bothered me. On the surface I believe the same thing. I realized that it's the old adage that it's not what you say it's how you say it. To some that means give it a shot and if you don't make it at least you know you tried. Period. To others it means give it your BEST and if you fail, dust yourself off and try again. Try try again with integrity, smarter and wiser every time. You can't fail if you never quit. That is what DRIVEN people do. They don't give up without a fight.

Cheers to the Drive!

Where's the CHEDDAR?

2009-05-22T13:00:00.010-04:00

"She needed cheddar and I understood that,
Lookin' for cheese that don't make her a hood rat" -Common

I had a chat with a friend that validated a perspective for me. The topic was choosing a partner who shares the same speed in life as you; common long term goals, interest and/or support of each others career goals, being on the same level. Speaking the same language. Sharing the same VALUES. That may seem obvious on the surface, but so many folks justify ignoring that idea.

I admitted to him that my experiences have lead me to seek outside of what I am typically attracted to. I have a tendency to tell myself "he's a good/nice/smart guy..." since people are always talking about how you gotta give a dude a chance... He understood where I was coming from and offered perfect advice, "I understand that you may not want to seem PRETENTIOUS, but you owe it to yourself to be real with you". He's right. It saves both parties some face. Down the road if a person lacks a significant amount of what is important to you, you may be headed for trouble. If they are less ambitious/educated/driven/worldly or uninterested in your passions there will be some resentment from either, if not both, people involved. For instance, the less driven person might begin to feel like the other thinks they are too good, tries too hard or even that their spouse doesn't see them as "good enough". They might feel uncomfortable in their partners "world". The more ambitious person may feel like they are carrying the weight or feel frustrated by the lack of participation of their partner. Even upbringing and family background can play a factor. These deeper concerns can translate to the more superficial things like, "please refrain from the slang and curse words this evening" or "you better dress appropriately to be seen with me tonight" or "Can you loosen up for today"!

That conversation reminded me that if you're looking for long term you better be thinking long term and no matter how "good" of a person someone may be, it doesn't mean a long term compatibility would be best. I once heard a sermon that we are on earth to be our best selves and that it is our duty not to shrink our greatness for fear of appearing snobbish or standing out in a crowd. Don't be afraid to seek the "cheddar" that you need.

Cheers to finding the right cheese!

Ooohhh Girls...

2009-03-31T03:00:00.005-04:00

Could be a simple coincidence that I happened to be watching the Sex and the City movie while I'm sitting at my PC going through the Suze Orman Ultimate Protection Portfolio CD. I was working on the documents for Power of Attorney, Revocable Trusts, Will, etc and realizing just how much I consider my "girls" to be my family. Coincidentally, both the Facebook quiz and I peg me as a Carrie Bradshaw, go figure...not to mention my girls are 3 who ironically enough remind me (on a more balanced level) of the 3 characters consecutively!

It was an awakening to realize that these girls were consistently the people who came to mind behind my parents and brother as a beneficiary, agent or executor. THAT brings a serious consciousness. Then as I watch this infamous movie for the second time, it totally bridged the reality for me.

I have this theory that the four characters of Sex and the City are designed to depict the different aspects of the female persona. We all have a pinch of them and "fight" with them from time to time either in fantasy or reality. You've got Samantha the flaming socialista always on the next big thing, Miranda the do it all cynical independent control freak, and Charlotte the fem conservative optimist with infinite rose colored glasses. Carrie was always the mediator or the common denominator amongst the quad. The often confused searcher/processor/narrator/thinker who without the reciprocation of what her girls give her, would be forever off center. They are "soulmates". Always there to take care of each other and "compliment" one another.

I thought to myself, I have no kids and have not yet found my partner for life. I don't have a lot of the "things" that I may have had a few years ago, but if anything has been consistent it has been my staples. My priceless accessories for life. My girls. How lucky I am. I hope I can always give to you what you never seize to give to me.

Cheers to Soul Sistas!

INTEGRITY.

2009-02-25T11:24:00.001-05:00

So I am a bit of an idealist. Always striving to balance fairness and seeking the same quality in other people. I had this epiphany that seemed to me to be the foundation of what makes a good, moral and fair (un-flakey/un-shady/mature) person who qualifies to be respected :-)

INTEGRITY! If you've got that, you've got the key to life because you are capable of treating yourself and others with fairness and respect...and you know that thing called KARMA! Do onto others...

So I looked for the best layman definition I could find that satisfied how I felt about the word. Have you seen Will Smith's movie Seven Pounds? He looked for people with INTEGRITY. The last answer below says it best...

www.wikianswers.com

A. What is the definition of integrity?
In: Religion and Spirituality, English Language

Answer:

In my own words I would say that INTEGRITY is, A very nice balance of self respect and confidence.,,,, Jamison.

Answer:

Integrity comes from the Greek words 'integritas' and 'integra' meaning whole. It enters into any aspect of one's life. It's belief system without faltering no matter how dangerous, how unpopular the person makes themselves to others. It includes: sincerity, keeping one's word and agreements, honesty, truthfulness, ethics, fairness and justice, punctuality and never faltering for what one believes in. A quote regarding integrity is 'It is better to have an enemy who keeps his word, than a friend who does not.'

Answer:

Keeping your good name/ character (assuming that it is good).

Answer:

Most definitely as the answer above, in addition, integrity is having values, being consistent with one's values or belief system, not wavering due to outside influences, standing strong in how one should live and believe.

ANSWER:

ALWAYS DOING THE RIGHT THING EVEN WHEN YOU KNOW NO ONE ELSE IS LOOKING.

STUPID on my forehead?

2009-02-16T11:59:00.002-05:00

I know you've experienced it...the wanderlust of whether or not you have a collage of "naive, slow, walk all over my ass or step on my neck" scrawled all over your face...looking someone square in the eye and LETTING them believe that they are getting away with something. You know, listening to someone act like they have no clue and not letting them know that their game is saran wrap - straight up transparent. What does it matter right? YOU know whats up. Somehow, I still find it difficult to turn a cheek now and then. I guess it's my opinionated nature but I choose my battles. I tend to have a habit of indifference so if I'm feeling the urge to snap back its gotta be for good cause - though sometimes I'll throw it back just for kicks; "where my ladies up in here that like to talk back?" I hear you B!!! LOL! Ehem, I digress...

So how do we handle it? I would say the way that leaves you with the upper hand. That doesn't mean with a vindictive act. That means with your head up. If your dealing with a child they might call you a sucka and then it REALLY doesn't matter. If they have any sense or integrity about them then they will have some remorse/guilt for themselves to live with. Accept folks for who they are, right? They & those that give them their energy gotta deal with them. Why should it be your problem? You got shit to do. Dust it off and keep it rollin, no? Cream rises to the top.

Cheers to a chin up!

Who's Hearin Who?

2009-01-22T15:59:00.002-05:00

A friend of mine pitched a question about communication (a matter I find to be of uber importance for growth in this life). Being a lover of all things deep and intangible.... I guess I am just one of those people that does not see much as black and white, everything is not always wrong or right.

So my thought on communication is that it is far more complicated than it is thought to be. It is not just about listening and offering. It is about being able to be neutral in emotion enough to speak without malicious intent and to receive without personalizing defense. In order to do this I think you've got to have a good amount of emotional maturity ("Gimme My Balance" http://deepwithit.blogspot.com/2008/12/gimme-my-balance.html)

We are only human, so if it means having to take some time to reflect before engaging then that's what you do. It's better than feeling like, "oooohhhh, I get it now" or "dang I should have thought about that" later. You know we've ALL been there! Not only that, but you have got to be able to look at yourself for where you could be "wrong" or misunderstanding or could be more clear about what the other party is telling you or what you would like to tell them. Reflecting ahead of time helps you to be able to listen clearly and not be thinking of your "next comeback" while the other party is sharing. It takes some maturity to be able to master communication.

That said, if only 1 party has that maturity, there is a big chance that the attempt to communicate is in vain as the other party is unable to communicate effectively. You gotta know when it is not worth the roundtable and exit the convo in the best manner possible. They may be more concerned with being right then understanding the others point of view. Also, if the communicating parties are both of a particular maturity, they will be able to agree to disagree to the difference of perspectives if a mutual agreement seems unlikely. Hey, some folks just have different values; ie one may prefer to steal another to work, one may prefer a marriage of convenience, another won't settle for a passionless relationship. Here is where you need to be aware of WHO you are communicating with. Are they on your level and able to agree to disagree???

Be aware of who you keep around you, it will affect your perspective and could bring you up or bring you down. May even open the eyes of a person who is always willing to learn :-)
("If you can't change your friends, change your friends" http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/DeepWithIt/~3/399037913/if-you-cant-change-your-friends-change.html)

Cheers to communicating!

Gimme My Balance!!!

2008-12-29T02:54:00.003-05:00

I had a chat on one of my favorite subjects with a young man wise beyond his years...

BALANCE.

It started from talking about how important it is to keep your cool and remain calm in order to get through situations that seem chaotic. Not like the chaos miraculously disappears but you are able to think clearly and see what steps to take to get through it. Like when you have a crazy busy day/week/month/year with deadlines and all kinds of urgencies...juggling a million and one concerns in your head. Basically, if you are in control of yourself you are able to step back review (not hyper analyze) and then handle yo bid'ness one step at a time. Panic is not an option. Why should we let anything or anyone else DRAG us through life???

He translated an Arabic quote that describes rough waters as shallow like the waves breaking at a beach shore and deep water as calm like the idiom "still waters run deep". He related the metaphor to the traits of man saying that the one who is loud or talking too much as if they are always trying to prove themselves or the one who is quick to snap with little control of their temper or emotions (rough waters) are the traits of a shallow or "surface" man. I've heard this described as emotional immaturity. Then you have the "disciplined" (observers and action takers), who are examples of deep thinkers or calm tranquil waters. They've got control of themselves! They got their shit in check! I can't help but to think of it as the weak vs the strong. Goodness knows we could all use a little strengthening in one area or another!

We talked about how we gotta learn to be in the "present" and get rid of the "junk" in our heads. You know, daydreaming or what I like to call "sidetracking" lol. Staying "present" is one of those invaluable SKILLS that we should take time to develop if it doesn't come naturally. There must be an infinite amount of self help books about it. It can save your life, and I mean to be dramatic about that statement! Reminds me of one of my fav India Arie joints..."Slow down baby your goin to fast, you got your hands in the air with your feet on the gas..." You gotta check the lyrics to that song!!!

Now...if I could just reprogram my mind to that state of peace in the midst of what I perceive to be chaos...I need to get my yoga on :-\

Cheers to balance!

Oh Facebook...

2008-12-10T01:31:00.002-05:00

So I have to admit that I got bit by the Facebook bug and I'm not so eager to shake it. That virtual voyeurism is kinda interesting to me. It's like 15 minutes of fame on steroids!

I can't tell you how many occasions I will hear people say, "hey, that dude is familiar...I think I've seen him on (Facebook/Myspace etc). BUGS ME OUT! One thing I still don't get is how, or is it why? Not so much why, probably more so what gives you the gaul to request a friendship from someone you just really DON'T KNOW??? I'm not mad at ya, just sayin....

I guess I still can't see me being that attentive to the social site world, but it's like an extension of how I felt when I started blogging... Just an opportunity for me to let down my walls. YOU KNOW... that apprehension about putting yourself "out there" for all to see...if they request...or accept your request...and if anyone could care less about checking you out...lol. I think it's liberating!!! Yeah, I can be a bit dramatic at times, but really though...people phone in what their doing, get alerts about what someone else is doing...we are our own BIG BROTHERS WATCHING...and so what!!! Be Free!!!!! Hahahaha!!!

Peace and cheers to FACEBOOK ;-)

Change IS.

2008-11-05T08:36:00.004-05:00

Last night at 12:55am I got a thank you text from the Obama camp and it was signed "Barack". Damn that mans campaign was TIGHT!

I walked out of the voting booth yesterday morning with a satisfaction in my soul and a cheese grill on my face. I knew what was about to be.

Our 44th President of the US is a son of a Muslim African immigrant named Barack Hussein Obama. He won by a landslide. These facts are a screaming example of this World's exhaustion and thirst for a difference.

I have never felt so proud looking at the TV screen in awe at the family that is about to occupy the White House. Did you peep the young lady walking across the stage with corn rows in her hair!!! Oh, and Michelle Obama...Whooo! So proud. I have to say...I never imagined I'd see the day.

My 5 year old godson and 5 month old nephew will not have to be told "you can be whoever you want to be" because seeing this extraordinary man in office shouts that out to the world. It will be a given. It will not even be a pondered thought, similar to how we don't think twice about sending an email or fixing a meal in a microwave. It just IS.

Change IS. It's not coming it's not on its way - it IS. Right Now.

Surely this is an iconic moment for the black man, but even further than that, this is an iconic moment for the generations to come; black or white, American or other. This begins a shift of political power. An introduction of integrity in government. If you did not listen to Barack Obama's speech you must. His honest commentary even forced those who made him President Elect stop and think.

The victory is not in the accomplishment of electing Obama. Victory is to come with what WE help him accomplish in his term. The buck doesn't stop here.

Cheers to our President Elect!

IF YOU CAN'T CHANGE YOUR FRIENDS - CHANGE YOUR FRIENDS...

2008-09-21T13:01:00.007-04:00

Putting that phrase into action can truly transform your life.

Don’t spend time waiting for others to change- you change.

I’m a person who always listens to the wise, but somehow I tend to have to learn the hard way. I guess it has to make personal sense to me. Recently I have watched a few different scenarios from people I care about who are in the midst of workin’ that phrase into their lives. Trust me; the end result is worth the pain of the separation.

It’s amazing the opportunities that open up when you build the courage to “let go”. That is the moment where you realize you can’t save the world and you sure as hell can’t continue to be made the fool. Everyone has the right to be who they are. It’s free will. We are the ones who make the decision on what we do and that decision dictates how we are going to feel.

We have to be so careful about how we spend our energy. We can encourage and teach to a certain degree, but we are never responsible for anyone else’s happiness. The thing is, in our path to our highest destiny we need to be strong enough to stick to the ideals that we believe in. It’s about integrity. Along the way we lead by example. One of two things will occur from that. Either those we love will “get it” when their timing is right OR they get left to the wayside. Sometimes we have to love from a distance. Hey, some people will never change!

As much as I used to hate to admit it, we are an example of the company we keep. For instance, they say that an individual’s income and lifestyle is relative of those in their closest proximity (not physical proximity meatheads...the people who you are closest to in life…like FRIENDS). SOOOOO, if you find yourself surrounded by liars, cheats, posers (fakin’ and never makin’), moochers, or cowards…you SURE better work on changing your friends or suffer the consequence of holding up your own personal success! Go find folks who are living (not posing) what you are looking to achieve and learn from them.

It is a selfish act, but not in the negative sense of the word. It is a healthy human instinct to protect you. Rest assured that anything less is UNHEALTHY! Know when to say when.

Cheers to change!

The Deepest DNC- Go Obama!

2008-08-28T23:03:00.004-04:00

Mmm, mmm, mmm...WOW. 45 years to date of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr's biggest speech pleading for the justice and peace between African Americans and America, this DNC has made its mark. I was already a fan, but I gotta say I am thoroughly awed by the presence Barack Obama layed down today. Flawless.

What an appropriate moment to blog after the last entry I posted. What a MAN! As real as it gets, fearless and sure. He takes the superficial titles and numbers and brings it back to the intangible purpose, passion and drive... As a social servant rather than a political policy pusher. Reminding us that the good still exists. Compassion and kindness is still strong. Honesty, truth and brotherhood are all around us. Dreams are attainable with belief and hard work. All the things this country needs to hear. He's a breath of fresh air at a time when folks are struggling to keep their faith. He's the one.

Cheers to Obama!

Passion vs. Obsession

2008-08-20T00:42:00.016-04:00

Have you heard that new Bank of America commercial? "America is full of passionate people...People who don't quit trying...People who wear their hearts on their sleeves..."

I listened to a restaraunt manager give a lecture to his crew about increasing the quality of service. He was fired up with positive forecasts. Some would shake their head at him and crack jokes when he wasn't looking. He refered to himself as "out there and eccentric". I corrected him and said, "it's called Passion". He smiled and agreed.

I didn't relate to his subject so much as I related to his drive. For that alone he earned my respect. What happened to PASSION? I realize that too many people can't comprehend it when they see it, but somehow they seek it...How can you seek something you don't understand???

Laughable but disappointing to realize that some translate passion as nutty or obsession. Horrifying. I literally feel a bit of pity for those who can't appreciate anothers passion. Is that what makes living out your dreams so hard to come by? Even in relationships - People have become so scarce to give and difficult to receive that old world romantic passion. Are people just afraid to give it or do they not know how? Even worse, could it be that folks subconsciously don't see themselves as worthy of being the receiver of such appreciation?

I'm noticing that it seems to be the case that those who live in mediocrity, a life WITHOUT passion, excitement, active goals or drive are usually the ones that don't "get it".

Now lets be clear here...If your crazy your crazy. Obsessively doing the same thing over and over again to chase a different result is a WHOLE other topic, lol! :-x

To my emotion embracing right brained comrades- the poets, the artists, the creators...

Cheers to "Obsessive" PASSIONS!

Back From Ground Zero

2008-08-17T11:37:00.004-04:00

I had lunch with a looooong time friend of mine yesterday. We are both so excited about new business ventures and where we are leading our lives. Thinking about what our stories will be in the next few years when we look back at how far we've come...the best memories on the path to success is in the journey!

She looked at me and said, "You've been to hell and back in a year. That is resilience."

Thanks for that homie :-)

I sooo appreciate the aknowledgement for my strides. Somehow I don't always recognize them myself. I noticed a feeling of surprise from MYSELF when she said it. Guess I've been so focused in continuing that stride that I haven't looked it over yet! Still so far to go, ya know?

Everyone has their ups and downs in degrees that cannot be measured or compared, but let's be for real - the mass of us are usually concerned with ourselves. I don't mean that in a negative way. I definitely believe it is often a necessity. We have to take care of ourselves in order to be able to take care of anyone else.

So last year was my ground zero. 2008 has been (and continues to be) the time that I take to rebuild with a CRAAAAZY solid foundation. The first step is with getting back to me, so I reengaged with an old hobby from childhood. Writing! I have previously been a rather private person. The more comfortable I get with myself the more I am willing to share...So I decided to blog it out :-D

Cheers to Growth!