Derek Robertson

Rethinking Fiction

Derek — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 23:03:23 +0000

Just got out of a screening of a documentary called Kings of Pastry.

It wasn’t a groundbreaking film in any sense of the word, though it was quite entertaining.

What struck me most though is that I can’t remember the last film I went to that had the audience gasping so many times, that held them in genuine suspense, that had them laughing, and had at least the girl sitting next to me moved to tears.

If a documentary on pastry chefs can ride those emotions what are we doing wrong with screenwriting?

It could be time to rethink the rules.

What I Saw – November 2010

Derek — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 02:21:50 +0000

PREVIOUS MONTHS of What I Saw:

From the Joke Notebook #1

Derek — Sat, 20 Nov 2010 23:23:47 +0000

“Sometimes when I call my place ‘my house’ I fear I will give the unit an apartment complex”

for more @derekrob

What I Saw – October 2010

Derek — Sun, 31 Oct 2010 06:15:57 +0000

PREVIOUS MONTHS of What I Saw:

A Classic ‘Back to the Future’ Scene 25 Years Later

Derek — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 03:20:59 +0000

As Back to the Future celebrates it’s 25th birthday you know a Hollywood executive is imagining
a way to remake it, imagine with me

When I was in Junior High School I remember hearing that The Wizard of Oz was one of the great films that could never be remade (apparently the film critic I heard conveniently forgot 1978’s The Wiz).

I remember thinking that’s really ashame because a modern Wizard of Oz would be so much cooler than a guy in a silly lion suit.

Apparently, as mentioned before, the idle daydreams of a preteen were shared by the decision makers in Hollywood and we now have a remake, a sequel, a prequel, and several other Wizard of Oz themed movies in the works.

If they’re remaking Oz, is there anything that’s truly remake proof? As Back to the Future gets re-released on Blu-Ray, DVD, and even for one day in some movie theaters to celebrate it’s 25th anniversary, and as the series captures headlines with cast reunions and video game developments is there not an executive sitting in an office somewhere thinking you know, we could reshoot that time travel movie in 3D!

And what if they did…

Would the iconic Deloraine be replaced with its modern day gull-winged relative, the 2011 Mercedes SLS AMG? I mean, like Doc said, if you’re going to build a time machine out of a car why not do it with style?

Would the Libyan terrorists of the 1985 film be re-written as an Al-Qaeda sleeper cell? Perhaps in a world that’s seen so much terrorism in the last decade, nervous studio executives would insist on axing the terrorist subplot all together. This would not only leave a gaping hole in Emmett Brown’s storyline, it’d also give a poor assignment writer some tough hoops to jump threw in explaining, in a positive light, where the good doctor’s stolen uranium came from.

Of course the biggest change would be a matter of time. The original film saw Marty travel from 1985 to 1955, a 30 year journey to a time when his parents were around the same age as him. If one were to remake the movie, present day Marty would have to have parent’s well into their 70s or the timeline would be seeing Marty travel way back in the past to… 1980.

That’s heavy, Doc.

Losing the setting of the 1950s changes the characters that inhabit the past, it changes their outlooks, their actions, and ultimately changes a good two thirds of your script… perhaps Back to the Future really is one that can never be remade?

In honour of the truly timeless Back to the Future’s 25th anniversary let’s imagine a classic scene built largely around a joke that was of it’s time…

DOC BROWN

Time machine, I haven’t invented any time machine.

MARTY

Okay, alright, I’ll prove it to you.

Pulling out his wallet...

MARTY

Look at my driver’s license, expires 1987. Look at my birthday, for crying out loud, I haven’t even been born yet. And look at this picture, my brother, my sister, and me. Look at the sweatshirt, Doc, class of 1984!

MARTY

Pretty mediocre photographic fakery, they cut off your brother’s hair.

MARTY

I’m telling the truth Doc. You gotta believe me.

DOC BROWN

So tell me Future Boy, who’s President of the United States in 1985?

MARTY

Ronald Reagan.

DOC BROWN

Ronald Reagan the actor?! Then who’s Vice President, Jerry Lewis?

And now updated for a remake…

DOC BROWN

Time machine, I haven’t invented a time machine.

MARTY

Okay, alright, I’ll prove it.

Marty pulls out an iPhone from his pants pocket.

Clicking on the Photos icon he scrolls through the thumbnails until he stops on one.

MARTY

Look at this picture, my brother, my sister, and me. Look at the sweatshirt, Doc, class of 2009!

DOC BROWN

Pretty mediocre photographic fakery, they cut off your brother’s hair.

MARTY

I’m telling the truth Doc. You gotta believe me.

DOC BROWN

Then tell me “future boy” who’s President in 2010?

MARTY

Barack Obama.

DOC BROWN

O’Bama? An Irish Catholic in the White House? Ha, like America could ever be that progressive.

MARTY

Well actually Doc... nevermind.

DOC BROWN

Let me guess, a woman is Vice President?

MARTY

Would you accept Secretary of State?

DOC BROWN

I’ve had enough practical jokes for one evening. Good night Future Boy!

MARTY

Wait, Doc, wait. Look at this...

Clicking through the iPhone again Marty opens up the video he recorded earlier.

Hitting play...

VIDEO DOC

Good evening I’m Dr. Emmett Brown, I’m standing here in the parking lot of Twin Pines Mall, it’s Tuesday morning, October 26th 2010.

DOC BROWN

Why that’s me! Look at me, I’m an old man!

MARTY

This is it, this is the part coming up, Doc.

DOC BROWN

This is truly amazing. A portable television studio.

MARTY

It’s called a Smart Phone, there’s apps for photos, videos...

DOC BROWN

Apps?

MARTY

Listen, listen...

VIDEO DOC

No, no, this sucker’s electrical, but I need a nuclear reaction to generate the 1.21 jigowatts of electricity I need.

DOC BROWN

What did I just say?

Marty jumps the video back a few seconds.

VIDEO DOC

...generate the 1.21 jigowatts of electricity I need.

DOC BROWN

1.21 jigowatts?! 1.21 jigowatts. Great Scott!!!

MARTY

What the hell is a jigowatt?

DOC BROWN

1.21 jigowatts, how am I gonna generate that kind of power? It can’t be done, oh I’m sure in 2010 there’s an app for that, but in 1955... Marty, I’m afraid you’re stuck here.

What I Saw – September 2010 (TIFF)

Derek — Thu, 30 Sep 2010 21:06:00 +0000

Photos of the Festival beyond the break:

PREVIOUS MONTHS of What I Saw:

What I Saw – August 2010

Derek — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 19:50:37 +0000

PREVIOUS MONTHS of What I Saw:

What I Saw – Just for Laughs Festival 2010

Derek — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 04:40:05 +0000

Photos from the Festival after the break…

PREVIOUS MONTHS of What I Saw:

What I Saw – July 2010

Derek — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 21:31:13 +0000

PREVIOUS MONTHS of What I Saw:

You Seemed Like a Riot

Derek — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 17:20:03 +0000

It’s summertime in Toronto and that means the city is swarming with tourists from all over the world.

Some come here to visit our museums, art gallery’s, amusement parks, beaches…

Some come here for events like Pride, Caribana, Jazz Fest, throwing temper tantrums (and projectiles) while the world’s 20 most powerful leaders meet…

Who hasn’t fallen for a tourist from time to time? A little summer lovin’, only for them to vanish from your life.

To that end I have posted this:

(Click on image to view larger or view it at http://toronto.en.craigslist.ca/tor/mis/1830172764.html)