Desires Unlimited

Bante da Chashma...

2010-05-23T08:23:00.001+05:30

Banta goes to the local novelty shop and finds a pair of x-ray glasses.(Chashme) He checks them out, and isn't fully convinced, but as usual,
The store assistant comes along and closes the deal.
On his way home, Banta puts on his new x-ray glasses and, bingo! He sees everyone in the street naked. He takes them off for a moment, and
everyone has their clothes on. Puts the glasses back on... Everyone is naked! "Cool!"
As he arrives back home, he is eager to show his new toy to his wife, Preeto, but can't find her. He goes up to the bedroom and finds his wife and
one of his colleagues, naked in bed. He takes his glasses off, and the two are still naked. He puts them back on, and they are still naked.
Banta says, "Oh teri dee, I just paid fifty bucks for it, aur kharab bhi ho gaya. Lagda Made in China hai !! !!!!

A Wednesday

2010-05-23T08:21:00.001+05:30

All of you who have seen the movie ‘Wednesday’... will love these rephrased Naseerudin Shah Dialogue’s...

Project Manager Rathore : kaun ho tum..??? kya pehcan hai tumhari ?

Unkonwn Caller : Kaun hoon mein...mein vo hu jo aaj committment karne se darta hai, Mein vo hoon jo aaj ghar jaane se darta ha, ye soch ke kahin ghar wale pehchanne se inkar na kar de...

mein vo hoon jo, aaj job change karta hai to sochta hai ki kahin recession mein mujhe company se na nikal de..

mein vo hoon jiski biwi usse friday ko dus bar phone karti hai, "kya kar rahe ho..?? kaam jyada hai..?? thak gaye ho..?? " mera haal poochne ke liye ya kaam poochne ke liye nahi, rathore saab... balki vo ye jaanaa chahti hai ki... kahin hamesha ki tarah end moment pe boss ke bulane pe mein saturdary ko bhi office to nahi ja raha...

mein vo hoon jo breakfast ke time pe dinner karta hai, lunch time pe breakfast karta hai, dinner ke time pe lunch karta hai.. vo bhi time mil jae to...

mein vo hoon jo aksar phasta hain kabhi Interviews ke sawaal mey phasta hai , kabhi Badi companiyon ke jaal mey phasta hai, kabhi boss aur client ke bawaal mey fasta hai.

Walk-In ki bheed to dekhi hogi aapne rathore saab... us bheed mein se koi bhi chehra chun lijie.. mein vo hoon..

I'm the…..STUPID SOFTWARE ENGINEER....

2009-07-09T01:01:00.000+05:30

Sikri, Distt. Bharatpur, Rajasthan, INDIA
Pin - 321024

A Wonderfull Story

2007-08-23T12:05:00.000+05:30

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."

"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.

"No", she replied. "He's out."

"Then we cannot come in", they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"

The woman went out and invited the men in"

" We do not go into a House together," they replied.

"Why is that?" she asked.

One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home."

The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How n ice!!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"

His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"

Their daughter was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"

"Let us heed our daughter's advice," said the husband to his wife.

"Go out and invite Love to be our guest ."

The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest."

Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, t he lady asked Wealth and Success: "I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"

The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success !!!!!!"

SUMO Woman Players

2007-08-23T11:54:00.001+05:30

The Secret behind the number 11

2007-08-23T11:03:00.000+05:30

The Secret behind the number 11

Pretty Chilling - read to the bottom. Try it out.
If you are a sceptical person - still read on as it's actually very interesting!!
This is actually really freaky!! (Mainly the end part, but read it all first)

1) New York City has 11 letters
2) Afghanistan has 11 letters.
3) Ramsin Yuseb has 11 letters. (The terrorist who threatened to destroy the Twin Towers in 1993)
4) George W Bush has 11 letters.

This could be a mere coincidence, but this gets interesting:
1) New York is the 11th state.
2) The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight number 11.
3) Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11
4) Flight 77 which also hit Twin Towers , was carrying 65 passengers. 6 + 5 = 11
5) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11 as it is now known. 9 + 1+ 1 =11
6) The date is equal to the US emergency services telephone number 911.

Sheer coincidence..?

Read on and make up your own mind:

1) The total number of victims inside all the hi-jacked planes was 254.
2 + 5 + 4 = 11
2) September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year.
3) The Madrid bombing took place on 3/11/2004. 3 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 4 = 11.
4) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towers incident.

Now this is where things get totally eerie:

The most recognized symbol for the US , after the Stars & Stripes, is the Eagle. The following verse is taken from the Koran, the Islamic holy book:

"For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced: for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah and there was peace."

That verse is number 9.11 of the Koran.

Unconvinced about all of this still ..?

Try this and see how you feel afterwards, it made my hair stand on end:

Open Microsoft Word and do the following:

1. Type in upper case Q33 NY. This is the flight number of the first plane to hit one of the Twin Towers .
2. Highlight the Q33 NY.
3. Change the font size to 48.
4. Change the actual font to the WINGDINGS……………………

Lamp Gives Light, Tree Gives Shade

2007-07-25T12:13:00.000+05:30

The greatness of an individual lies not in what he accumulates but what he gives. Jesus is great because he suffered on the cross so that we are saved. Gandhi was great as he fought for freedom and equality. Mother Teresa was great as she spent her life serving poor, sick and destitute.

You need not be someone of great means to give. A lamp burns its own existence till the last moment to fight darkness and give light. Tree never asks anything for itself, but give flowers, fruits and shades to all who needs it. This kind of sacrifice is only possible for those, whose heart his filled with love and compassion for others. Their spirit has a passion for serving and an ability to feel pain of others in their own soul. It requires a go-give attitude more than a go-get attitude.

Dashrath Manjhi, a poor, illiterate, landless laborer, who lives in a backward village called Gahlore situated in the sate of Bihar in Eastern India. What a person like him could give to others?

Dashrath worked on a field near the hill that rose near the village. This hill stood between his village and civilization with only a treacherous pass between it. Since most of the cultivable land and shops were on other side of the hill, the poor villagers had to brave the dangerous pass number of times in a day. The authorities kept turning a blind eye towards the problems for decades.

One day, his wife slipped and got injured while crossing the pass on the hill, while bringing lunch for him. The incident disturbed Dashrath so much that he decided to do something about it. He sold his goat, to purchase a chisel, hammer and a rope. And with these simple equipments he set of to dig a tunnel through the mountain, all by himself. He dug for 22 years to create a passage that is 360 ft. long, 25 feet high and 16 ft wide, enough for a vehicle to pass.

People called him mad, but he was a man with a purpose. Today, because of him the life of his fellow villagers has become easier. He has thrown the doors open for the development of his village as the passage reduced the distance between two districts from 50 km to just 8 km. The state government rewarded his achievement by giving him five acres of land.

But his story does not end here. Unfortunately, his wife did not survive to witness the miracle her husband has created. She died of an illness without treatment because of lack of proper medical facilities. So, now he wants to build a hospital on the land he got as reward. After unsuccessful attempts to get assistance from the local government in this regard, he decided to meet the President of India. Since he did not have enough money to buy a railway ticket he walked on foot a distance of nearly thousand kilometers. Somebody rightly said that when dreams are big enough facts don’t count.

This poor, illiterate gentleman, belonging to the most unprivileged class of Indian society is a perfect example of success. His go-give attitude, his compassion, dream, courage, faith in himself, determination and perseverance raises him to level of greatness.

In our mundane life full of rat race for accumulation of wealth and worldly pleasure, let us take out some time to give a bit of ourselves. Let us become a slightly better human being than what we already are. After all the supreme purpose of our lives is to spread happiness and help others and that is the greatest gift of all.

Interview Tips

2007-06-12T13:44:00.000+05:30

interview tips

1. Be on time!
Practise getting to the venue to see how long it will take. Public transport may be useless, the traffic may have been heavy, but however reasonable it won't affect the fact that your chances are reduced if you are late. Always remember - You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

Aim to be early - you can always find a nearby cafe/shop/pub to wait in. And if worst comes to worst and you are going to be late, then definitely ring in and let them know.

2. Be Prepared!
Look at the employers' website and learn something about the company before you attend your interview. Feed them the opportunity to talk proudly about something positive you have found.

3. Write down and practice possible questions!
Writing them down and practicing them with someone will make it easier to remember when you get to the interview. Use the third person when talking about the job. Avoid sounding as though you assume the job is yours.

It is fine to ask about the package on offer and accommodation - living in and living out are particularly relevant. Don't forget to find out if the company will guarantee a resort or chalet - many will only allocate you a country. You could also try a fewer more testing questions such as how they differentiate themselves from their competitors or what they think the toughest/hardest part of the job is.

4. What are your weaknesses?
Don't be Spud from Trainspotting! 'None…ah well, ah'm a bit of a perfectionist actually!' Try to find an area of your experience/skill that is currently lacking. An interviewer will appreciate your candour - as long as whatever you disclose can be easily remedied.

5. You never get a second chance to make a first impression!
SMILE! Dress professionally in simple business attire. Just because you are going to be working in a ski resort does not mean you should wear Oakleys and a fleece to your interview. And don't forget that firm handshake and to maintain eye contact - without glaring!

6. Be honest!
There really is no point lying about your background and/or skills. If you get caught, or even manage to get out to resort and then get found out, you can be sure you won't be around for long! Job interviews are about matching needs - if there isn't a good match, then chances are that the job won't work out.

7. Check your CV for possible gaps!
Make sure you know how you are going to explain time gaps on your CV.

8. Talk about specific achievements!
Interviewers like to know how you felt about about a particular success. Some will ask for specific examples of things you've done that you're particularly proud of; how you solved problems; how you learned - and improved - from difficult situations.

9. Don't talk too much!
Spud again - Communication is a two-way thing so give them a chance

10. Prepare a sample menu plan!
If you are applying for a catering job then take along a sample menu plan. By this we mean a starter/main/dessert combination over six days, ideally with a vegetarian option. Think about teh balance of nutrients and how the colours will look on the plate. Our recipe section has a number of favourites.

11. Take a spare photo & CV with you!
Your interviewer won't be expecting it so you will impress them. It also helps them remember you after the interview.

12. Be enthusiastic and positive!
Don't criticize previous employers, particularly within the industry. Focus on positive achievements and views.

12. Be on time!

And finally, Don't give up!
The fact is that you will not be offered every job however perfect you think you may be for it. Usually it's because the interviewer was completely blind to the talent that stood before them. However, just on the off chance that it was not, feedback from interviews where you have been turned down can be invaluable for improving future results. Ask politely if they can give you any feedback for the future - there's a job out there for you somewhere.

Best of luck!!!

101 Amazing Ways To Order A Pizza

2007-06-12T12:31:00.000+05:30

Ask if you can get a pizza with just crust, no toppings.

Call a delivery-only pizza store and insist on "dining in."

Using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.

Make up a credit card name. Ask if they accept it. Cheer if they say yes.

Use CB lingo where applicable.

Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.

Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.

Answer their questions with questions.

Use these bonus words in the conversation: ROBUST FREE-SPIRITED COST-EFFICIENT UKRAINIAN PUCE.

Tell them to put the crust on top this time.

Sing the order to the tune of your favorite song from any Metallica CD.

Don't name the toppings you want - spell them out.

Put an extra edge in your voice when you say "crazy bread."

Stutter on the letter "p."

Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g. Order "The Edge" from Little Caesar's or a "Cheeser! Cheeser!" from Domino's)

Ask what the order taker is wearing.

Crack your knuckles into the receiver.

Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.

Rattle off your order with a determined air. If they ask if you would like drinks with that, panic
and become disoriented.

Tell the order taker you're depressed. Get him/her to cheer you up.

Make a list of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings.

Change your accent every three seconds.

Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.

Act like you know the order taker from somewhere. Say "Bed-Wetters' Camp, right?"

Start your order with "I'd like...". A little later, slap yourself and say "No, I don't."

If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say "OK. That'll be $10.99 please pull up to the first window."

Try to rent a pizza.

Order while using an electric knife sharpener.

Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.

Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.

Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."

Say "Are you sure this is (Pizza Place)? When they say yes, say "Well, so is this! You've got some explaining to do!" When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact, (Pizza Place), start to cry and ask, "Do you know what it's like to be lied to?"

Move the mouthpiece farther and further from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream goodbye at the top of your lungs.

Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.

Imitate the order taker's voice.

Eliminate verbs from your speech.

When they say "What would you like?" say, "Huh? Oh, you mean now."

Play a sitar in the background.

Say it's your anniversary and you'd appreciate if the deliverer hid behind some furniture waiting for your spouse to arrive so you can surprise him/her.

Amuse the order taker with little-known facts about country music.

Ask to see a menu.

Quote Gandhi.

Say you'll be able to pay for this when the movie people call back.

Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza.

Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.

Belch directly into the mouthpiece then tell your dog it should be ashamed.

Order a slice, not a whole pizza.

Shout "I'm through with men/women! Send me a dozen of your best, Gaston!"

Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say "Where was I? Who are you?"

Psychoanalyze the order taker.

Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.

Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."

Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. Ask that these be included in the pizza.

Call to complain about service. Later, call to say you were drunk and didn't mean it.

Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor he's fired.

Report a petty theft to the order taker.

Use expletives like "Great Caesar's Ghost!" and "Great Scott!"

Ask for the guy who took your order last time.

If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed by your sweet words."

Wonder aloud if you should trim those nose hairs.

Try to talk while drinking something. Gargle.

Start the call with "My Call to (Pizza Place), Take 1, and...action!"

Ask if the pizza is organically grown.

Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.

Be vague with your order.

When they repeat your order, say "Again, with a little more OOMPH this time."

Using a touch-tone phone, press 9-1-1 every 5 seconds throughout the order.

After ordering, say "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a hangup.

Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry."

State your order and say that's as far as this relationship is going to get.

Ask if they're familiar with the term "spanking a pizza." Make up a description to go with the
term. Ask that this be done to your pizza.

Say "Kssssssssssssssht" rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.

Detect the order taker's psychic aura. Use it to your advantage.

When listing toppings you want on your pizza, include another pizza.

Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it.

Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.

Perfect a celebrity's voice. Stress that you won't take any crap from some two-bit can't-hack-it
pimple-faced gofer. Threaten to hit said gofer with a golf club.

Put them on hold.

Teach the order taker a secret code. Use the code on all subsequent orders.

Mumble, "There's a bomb under your seat." When asked to repeat that, say "I said 'sauce smothered with meat'."

Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say "No mushrooms,
please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.

When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say "You just don't get it, do you?"

When you're given the price, say "Ooooooo, that sounds complicated. I hate math."
Haggle.

Order a one-inch pizza.

Order term life insurance.

When they say "Will that be all?" snicker and say "We'll find out, won't we?"

Order with a Speak-n-Spell.

Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.

While on the phone, fake your voice changing. Fluctuate pitch often. Act embarrassed.

Engage in some serious swapping.

Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If he/she says it, say "Please don't mention that word."

Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background. Yell "OW!" when a bullet is fired.

If he/she suggests a side order, ask why he/she is punishing you.

Ask if the pizza has had its shots.

Order a steamed pizza.

Get taker's name. Later, call exactly on the hour to say, "This is your (time of day) wake-up call, So-and-so." Hang up. Repeat every hour.

Offer to pay for the pizza with a public flogging.

If any of the above practices are rejected by the order taker, say, in your best pouty voice, "The last guy let me do it."

Funny SMS's

2007-05-22T15:03:00.001+05:30

PYAR TO HAMKO BHI KARNA THA,LEKIN BAAT KHAS HUI NAHI,
TAJMAHAL TO HAMKO BHI BANWANA THA,LEKIN AFSOSS KI LOAN PASS HUI NAHI…..!!!

DEKHA TUJHE TO ROOH KHUSH HO GAYI,EK KAMI THI VO BHI PURI HO GAYI,
PAGAL HAIN VO LOG JO KEHTE HAIN KI,CHIMPANZI KI AAKHRI NASAL KAHIN KHO GAYI!!

MERE DIL, JIGER, KIDNEY, LIVER HO TUMWAQT-BEWAQT AAYE VO FEVER HO TUMDOOB KAR JISME MARR JAOO VO RIVER HO TUMMERE JEEVAN MEIN AB TO FOREVER HO TUM…

SHAAM HOTE HI YE DIL UDAAS HOTA HAITOOTE KHWABOO KE SIWA KUCH NA PASS HOTA HAITUMAHRI YAAD AISE WAQT BOHAT AATI HAIBANDAR JAB KOI AAS-PAAS HOTA HAI..

ULTIMATE TRUTHS

2007-05-22T14:58:00.000+05:30

Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock. To Err is human, to forgive is not a COMPANY policy. The road to success…….. is always under construction.

Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does milk.. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it. Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak. Everyone has a scheme of getting rich….. which never works.
If at first you don't succeed…. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried. You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side. Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.

***** 42.7% of all statistics is made on the spot. *****

He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule. If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late…… the bus is still late. Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate. If you have paper, you don't have a pen……. If you have a pen, you don't have paper…… if you have both, no one calls.

Especially for engg. Students----If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance. All Govt buses are crowded.Corollary--- -- The Govt buses in opposite direction always go empty. The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.

After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other. If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight. The last person to be fired or quit is responsible for all the errors until another person is fired or quits. Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker.

The Best "Out-Of-Office" E-Mail Auto-Replies

2007-05-22T14:50:00.000+05:30

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if Ifail to get the position .
2: I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.
3: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out ofthe office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have receivedanything at all.
4: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brainremoved so that I may be promoted to management
5: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails yousend me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient andyour mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
6: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in yourmessage.
7: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection andis unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer andtry sending again.'
( The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over).
8: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuingsystem. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive areply in approximately 19 weeks.
9: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait byyour PC for my response.
10: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't botherto leave me any messages.
11: I've run away to join a different circus.
AND, FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE CAKE:
12: I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medicalreasons.
When I return, please refer to me as ' Loretta' instead of 'Steve '

Miss You

2007-04-27T10:27:00.000+05:30

Care for the one who shares with u, share with the one who knows u, know the one who misses u, miss the one who wishes the best for U.

• No sweet thought to forward, no cute graphics to send. Just a 'Caring Heart' saying, 'Take Care!' Miss U!

• God must be partial to have endowed a single soul with so much beauty, grace, panche, elgance & allure. If I ever have d luxury of dreaming of u, I bet I'll b afraid of waking up coz I wouldn't want 2 lose U!

• Nobody's right till sumbody's wrong.Nobody's weak till sumbody's strong.Nobody's lucky till luv comes along.Nobody's lonely till sumbody's gone. Missing U!

• Those we Luv never go away, they walk beside us everyday... unseen & unheard, still near... still loved... still Missed & still very dear. Missing U

Whenever I miss U, I won't luk 4 u in my dreams or try to hear ur voice in ur msgs. I'll just put my right hand across my chest & will feel U!

Every tear is a sign of brokenness, every silence is a sign of loneliness, every smile is a sign of kindness, every SMS is a sign of rememberance. Miss U!

Your absence should be long enough so that somebody misses u, it shouldn't be so long that somebody finds out that how well he can do without u...!

A raindrop may luk 2 small 2 eyes but sumwhere a thirsty flower await its fall. A sms may seem 2 small but sumwhere a heart remembers u when it receives ur sms. Keep SMS'ing.

What makes a frindship special is the way each one remembers the other when they are apart. They miss the talks, the laughs n the time they spent together. Life changes, memories don't. I miss U.

• Whenever I miss U, I won't luk 4 u in my dreams or try to hear ur voice in ur msgs. I'll just put my right hand across my chest & will feel U!

• Every tear is a sign of brokenness, every silence is a sign of loneliness, every smile is a sign of kindness, every SMS is a sign of rememberance. Miss U!

• Your absence should be long enough so that somebody misses u, it shouldn't be so long that somebody finds out that how well he can do without u...!

• A raindrop may luk 2 small 2 eyes but sumwhere a thirsty flower await its fall. A sms may seem 2 small but sumwhere a heart remembers u when it receives ur sms. Keep SMS'ing.

• What makes a frindship special is the way each one remembers the other when they are apart. They miss the talks, the laughs n the time they spent together. Life changes, memories don't. I miss U.

Learn Something from Here

2007-03-28T09:47:00.000+05:30

A man came out of his home to admire his new truck . To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint.

The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into a pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands.

When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck ." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back? "

The father went home and committed suicide.

Think about the story the next time you see someone spill milk at a dinner table or hear a baby crying. Think first before you lose your patience with someone u love.

Trucks can be repaired. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

T-Shirts Saying

2007-03-22T09:17:00.000+05:30

Always remember you're unique... Just like everyone else.

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!

Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

I'm not getting smaller I'm backing away from you.

Did you eat a bowl of stupid for breakfast?

I don't know what makes you dumb But it really works.

Rehab Is for Quitters

My Dog Can Lick Anyone

Computer programmers don't byte They nibble a bit.

BEER It's not just for breakfast anymore.

I(nternal) R(evenue) S(ervice) We've got what it takes to take what you've got.

Out of my mind... Back in five minutes.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

There's too much blood in my alcohol system.

People like you are the reason people like me need medication.

Oh crap! You're going to try and cheer me up, aren't you?

Do not disturb I'm disturbed enough already.

Excuse, but do I look like someone who cares?

Procrastinate Now

Funny T Shirt Saying

All men are idiots And I married their king.

In America Anyone Can Be President That's One of the Risks You Take.

Funny T Shirt Saying

Hard work has a future payoff Laziness pays off now.

Funny T Shirt Saying

Where there's a will... I want to be in it.

Funny T Shirt Saying

EARTH FIRST! We'll strip-mine the other planets later.

Funny T Shirt Saying

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.

Funny T Shirt Saying

I wear the brains in the family.

No sense in being pessimistic It wouldn't work anyway!

I'm sorry My fault I forgot you were an idiot

Story 2

2007-03-21T15:23:00.000+05:30

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to
door to pay his
way through school, found he had only one thin dime
left, and he was
hungry.
He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house.
However, he lost
his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.
Instead of a meal
he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked
hungry so brought
him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and
then asked, "How
much do I owe you?"

"You don't owe me anything," she replied "Mother has
taught us never
to accept payment for a kindness." He said... "Then I
thank you from
my heart."

As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt;
stronger
physically, but his faith in God and man was strong
also. He had been
ready to give up and quit.

Years later that young woman became critically ill.
The local doctors
were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city,
where they called
in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard
Kelly was called
in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the
town she came
from, a strange light filled his eyes.
Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the
hospital to her room.
Dressed in his doctor's gown he we nt in to see her.
He recognized her
at once. He went back to the consultation room
determined to do his
best to save her life. From that day he gave special
attention to the
case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly
requested the
business office to pass the final bill to him for
approval. He looked
at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill
was sent to her
room.
She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take
the rest of her
life to pay for it all. Finally, she looked, and
something caught ;
her attention on the side as She read these words.....

"Paid in full with one glass of milk." (Signed) Dr.
Howard Kelly.

Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart
prayed: "Thank You,
GOD, that Your love has spread abroad through human
hearts and hands."

NOW YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES.
You can send this page on and spread a positive
message or ignore it
and pretend it never touched you.

Beautiful Story 1

2007-03-21T15:22:00.000+05:30

There was once this guy who is very much in love with
his girl. This
romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of paper cranes as a
gift to his
girl.

Although, at that time he was just a small fry in his
company, his
future didn't seem too bright, they were very happy
together. Until
one day, his girl told him she was going to Paris and
will never come
back. She also told him that she cannot visualize any
future for the
both of them, so they went their own ways there and
then...

Heartbroken, the guy agreed. But when he regained his
confidence, he
worked hard day and night, slogging his body and mind
just to make
something out of himself.

Finally with all the hard work and the help of
friends, this guy had
set up his own company .

You never fail until you stop trying. One rainy day,
while this guy
was driving, he saw an elderly couple sharing an
umbrella in the rain
walk ing to some destination. Even with the umbrella,
they were still
drenched. It didn't take him long to realize they were
his girl's
parents.

With a heart in getting back at them, he drove slowly
beside the
couple, wanting them to spot him in his luxury sedan.
He wanted them
to know that he wasn't the same any more; he had his
own company, car,
condo, etc. He made it! What he saw next confused him,
the couple was
walking towards a cemetery, and so he got out of his
car and
followed...and he saw his girl, a photograph of her
smiling sweetly as
ever at him from her tombstone and he saw his paper
cranes right
beside her...

Her parents saw him. He asked them why this had
happened. They
explained, she did not leave for France at all. She
was ill with
cancer. She had believed that he will make it someday,
but she did not
want to be his obstacle... therefore she had chosen to
leave him.
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you wa
nt them to,
doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
She had wanted
her parents to put his paper cranes beside her,
because, if the day
comes when fate brings him to her again...he can take
some of those
back with him...

Once you have loved, you will always love. For what's
in your mind may
escape but what's in your heart will remain forever.

The guy just wept...The worst way to miss someone is
to be sitting
right beside her knowing you can't have her, see her
or be with her
ever again....... ..hope you understand.

Find time to realize that there is one person who
means so much to
you, for you might wake up one morning losing that
person who you
thought meant nothing to you.

KINDNESS Pays !

Pappu Jokes......

2007-03-21T12:45:00.000+05:30

TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
PAPPU : "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
PAPPU : Yesterday you said it's H to O !
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America.
PAPPU : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS : PAPPU!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell "crocodile"?
PAPPU : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
PAPPU : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : PAPPU, give me a sentence starting with "I".
PAPPU : I is...
TEACHER : No, PAPPU. Always say, "I am."
PAPPU : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?"
PAPPU : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree,
but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish
him?"
PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !
PAPPU: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
PAPPU: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his ?
PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog !
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PAPPU: A teacher

Loneliness . . .

2007-03-21T12:36:00.000+05:30

Loneliness . . .

Always thought that I would be more happier been alone
A wicked promise I made to myself
Assuming that nobody can change my stubborn mind

As life goes on , when time flies
Thought it's better if someone there
To share all happy and sad moments
Someone to share my secrets and feelings
Especially to stand beside me when I am down

Over the Past years I see nothing but the loneliness
Haunting me like a black shadow covering my soul
And the one I regret most in my life now

Life is full of opportunities
Have to accept it at that very moment
Without waiting for better prospects
As these opportunities may never again be available

As I realized what I have missed in my life all these years
I am waiting to see a shooting star
To make a promise once again
To change my life . . .

Change our Vision

2007-03-13T12:29:00.000+05:30

There was a millionaire who was bothered by severe eye pain. He consulted so many physicians and was getting his treatment done. He did not stop consulting galaxy of medical experts; he consumed heavy loads of drugs and underwent hundreds of injections.

But the ache persisted with great vigour than before. At last a monk who has supposed to be an expert in treating such patients was called for by the millionaire. The monk understood his problem and said that for sometime he should concentrate only on green
colours and not to fall his eyes on any other colours. The millionaire got together a group of painters and purchased barrels of green color and directed that every object his eye was likely to fall to be painted in green colour just as the monk had
directed.

When the monk came to visit him after few days, the millionaire's servants ran with buckets of green paints and poured on him since he was in red dress, lest their master not see any other colour and his eye ache would come back.

Hearing this monk laughed said "If only you had purchased a pair of green spectacles, worth just a few rupees, you could have saved these walls and trees and pots and all other articles and also could have saved a large share of his fortune. You cannot paint
the world green." Let us change our vision and the world will appear accordingly. It is foolish to shape the world, let us shape ourselves first.

Lets change our vision..!!

Think simple,Live simple..

Love Quotes

2007-03-13T12:20:00.000+05:30

1) dear cute...Love is the best medicine, and there is more than enough to go around once you open your heart. please open your heart 4 me with love.

2) Love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you. Please don't hurt my heart .

3) Fear less, hope more, eat less, chew more, whine less, breathe more, talk less good for u. LOVE MORE and all good things will be yours.

4) When two people love each other, they don't look at each other, they look in the same direction. Believe it or not.

5) We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another. You want to become angel? Come I will give my wing. Love you so much.

6) Don't say you love me unless you really mean it, because I might do something crazy like believe it!.

7) Love is like a roller coaster. Once you have completed the ride, you want to go again. We will love for rest of our life .

8) Love bears all things, Love believes all things, Love hopes all things, and most precious of all, Love endures all things. Come we love and make things happy.

9) If death is the only way we will part then let me die with you because I cannot live without you. BUT I cannot die because my heart is with you .

10) not allowed without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best in the world.

11) If 'I love you' is only three words, why is it worth a million?. Because you know Love will do miracles

12) How lucky I am to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to. Love you dear.

13) We are each an angel with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing each other.

14) If you live to be 100 yrs, I want to live to be 100 yrs minus one day, so I never have to live without you. I Cant live with out U..

15) I knew I would look back on my tears and laugh, but I never thought I would look back on my laughs and cry. Please don't hurt me darling

16) Everyone hears what you say. I listen to what you say. Best Lover listen to what you don't say.

17) A memory lasts forever, Never does it die. True Lovers stay together And never said goodbye. Donot say good bye to me my sweet heart.

18) A road to a your house is never long for me. Because you are in my heart house.

19) I'm not the same since i met u, the days turned longer the nights turned colder and u will always have a special place in my heart just 4 u :) I LOVE YOU .

20) love is when u don't want to go to sleep because reality is better than a dream. I will not sleep 2day. Waiting for you .

21) Last night I looked up at the stars, And matched each one with a reason why I love you. Till I cannot matched .

22) When I saw u afraid 2 meet you, When I met u, afraid 2 like you, When I liked u afraid 2 love you, But now that I LOVE U .I am afraid 2 lose u. love me for ever .

23) If I would be a tear in your eye I will roll down on your cheek and die on your lip and if you would be a tear in my eye I will never cry by a fear of losing you.

24) Love makes life so confusing and difficult but without love would you want to live?. With out you I cannot breath also. Because my heart is with u .

25) If you love me like you told me please be careful with my heart you can take it; just don't break it ..

Engineer Woh Hai

2007-03-13T12:19:00.001+05:30

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Aksar Phasta Hai
Interviews Ke Sawaal Mae
Badi Companiyon Ki Chaal Mae
Boss Aur Client Ke Bawaal Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Pak Gaya Hai
Meetings Ki Jhelai Mae
Submissions Ki Gehrai Mae
Teamwork Ki Chatai Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Laga Rahta Hai
Schedule Ko Failane Mae
Targets Ko Khiskaane Mae
Roz Naye-Naye Bahane Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo
Lunch Time Mae Breakfast Karta Hai
Dinner Time Mae Lunch Karta Hai
Commutation Ke Waqt Soya Karta Hai

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Pagal Hai
Chai Aur Samose Ke Pyar Mae
Cigeratte Ke Khumar Mae
Birdwatching Ke Vichar Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Khoya Hai
Reminders Ke Jawaab Mae
Na Milne Wale Hisaab Mae
Behtar Bhavishya Ke Khwaab Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jise Intezaar Hai
Weekend Night Manane Ka
Boss Ke Chhutti Jaane Ka
Increment Ki Khabar Aane Ka

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Sochta Hai
Kaash Padhai Pe Dhyaan Diya Hota
Kaash Teacher Se Panga Na Liya Hota
Kaash Ishq Na Kiya Hota

Aur Sabse Behtar To Ye Hota
Kambakht Engineering Hi Na Kiya Hota............

Fact's........Good One...

2007-03-10T09:20:00.000+05:30

1. God is real, unless declared integer.

2. Before borrowing money from a friend, decide whether you need more.

3. Death is hereditary.

4. There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.

5. An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

6. Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

7. When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

8. Where there's a will there are five HUNDRED relatives.

9. Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

10. Well done is better than well said.

11. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't Expect it back.

12. If you can't see the bright side of life,polish the dull side.

Rose...a heart touching Story..

2007-03-09T12:53:00.000+05:30

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get
to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand
touched my shoulder.

I turned a round to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile
that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm 87 years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant
squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple
of kids..."

"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on
this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told
me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.

We became instant friends. Every day for the next 3 months we would leave class
together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine"
as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends
wherever she went.

She loved to dress up and she revealed in the attention bestowed upon her from the
other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet.

I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.
As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by 5 cards on the
floor.

Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never
get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.

There are only 4 secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success.

You have to laugh and find humor every day.

You've got to have a dream.

When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it!

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are 19 years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn 20 years old. If I am 87 years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I
will turn 88.

Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not
do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over 2.000 college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can
possibly be.

When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends
and family, they'll really enjoy it!

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.
We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

Happy Women's Day.....Just Kidding

2007-03-09T12:29:00.000+05:30

Q. What do you call a fat lady waiting for a bus?
A. Moti-vating !!!

What is the difference between WATCH & WIFE ?
Ek bigadti hai to bandh ho jati hai......
Doosari bigadati hai to "SHUROO' ho jati hai ........

Doctor : App ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai.
Man : Hoga, zarur hoga; 25 saal se mera khoon jo pee rahi hai.

What's the similarity between MOBILE and MARRIAGE ?
In both case you feel "aur thoda ruk jata to accha model milta"

Ek admi sadhu se bola, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay
batao.
Sadhu bola, saale, upay hota to mai sadhu kyu banta?

Man runs home yelling: Pack your bags honey. I just won the 10 Million
lotto.
Wife : Do I pack for the beach or mountains ?
Man : Who cares ? Just pack and get lost !

I wrote your name on sand, it got washed.
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away.
I wrote your name on my heart,
And I got a heart attack.

God saw me hungry, he created pizza.
He saw me thirsty, he created pepsi.
He saw me in dark, he created light.
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.