Diary of a Lagos drama

THE WORD FOR TODAY - FOR YOUR GOOD

2016-05-08T06:00:00.000+00:00

Today’s Scripture

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”

(Romans 8:28, NLT)

TODAY'S WORD

Every person goes through disappointments and things that don’t seem to make sense. It’s easy to get discouraged and think, “Why did this happen to me?” “Why did my loved one not make it?” “Why did this person treat me wrong?” “Why did I get laid off?” A man recently told us how he lost his job after many years. He just didn’t understand it. He said, “I gave that company my best. I was always there on time. I was loyal. It’s just not right.”

We have to understand that even though life is not always fair, God is fair. He promises that He will work all things together for our good. The key word in today’s verse is “together.” In other words, don’t just isolate one part of your life and say, “Well, this is not good.” “It’s not good that I got laid off.” “It’s not good that my child got sick.” “It’s not good that my relationship didn’t work out.” Yes, that’s true, but that’s just one part of your life. God can see the big picture. That disappointment is not the end. Your life doesn’t stop because of one setback. That is simply one piece of your puzzle. There is another piece coming to connect it all because God promises to work all things together for your good!

A Prayer for Today

“Father, thank You for working all things together for my good. I choose to release any doubt, frustration or confusion over my past, and I choose to trust in You. Help me to see the big picture as I keep my mind stayed on You in Jesus’ name. Amen

SOURCE: JOEL AND VICTORIA OSTEEN

SPEND LESS, LOOK GOOD SERIES

2016-05-06T09:45:00.000+00:00

We haff come again...

we haff come again...

Moby haff come again...

Holyghost please keep her here... hehe

* TI mode activated*

You can have whatever you like..

You can buy whatever you like....

Yo sup ma pipu... I am back again with another spendless post...

Guess who I saw yesterday? I know you won't guess right even if I gave you hints. I saw our dear Lizzy... She came over to our studio yesterday and I think she is a fantastic somebody. The gist was just overflowing...we just couldn't stop. And then she said 'Moby tomorrow is Spendless post day o'.... Truthfully I had no plans of putting up anything today but I made up my mind to put up this one cos of her. Love you bubba...

I am wearing a denim shirt on a skater skirt that I made (not myself o...tailor lo ran).

The shirt is a generational shirt *covers face*...meaning it was passed down from generation to my own generation...hehe.

My mum had this denim when she was still lepa and she passed it on to my sister and I stole it from her. I have had this denim since forever...can't remember how long I've had it... it has seen good and bad days with me ehn...kai kai

The skirt was made for me in Eko idumota market... you know all those wait and get tailor...yep yep. A friend of mine got the material for me and collected it for me... I love this skirt so much,I've been warned not to wear it for the next 5 month.

Had to upload this picture of me and the famous Fada J legs. He is my early Sunday morning picture buddy (I don't know if that's a thing)... He makes amazing shoes. You should holla for his number if you want to wow your husband (see free advert o... FJL my money o)

And finally, the shoe was a gift... love love love

I don't think you have to sell all your valuables to look this good (well I think I looked good in this combo). You can get a good quality denim for less than 4 thousand naira in Eko Idumota market and the skirt was made for less than 3 thousand naira.

In other news, who can tell me the difference between being prudent and being cheap? *crosses legs*.

HUSBAND BENEFITS

2016-05-01T05:00:00.000+00:00

Hello mi lovies..

I decided to put up this post instead of the regular Sunday devotional because I feel a lot of women need to see this.

Hopefully, I am able to reach at least 50 women with this post. I don't need everyone to read this... I just need the people that need it to get the point.

I decided to share this post because number 1, I am a woman and 2, I see my fellow sisters make this mistake a lot. Truth is, I don't blame anyone. We grew up differently and we learnt differently. We are all a product of our environment and the people we hang around and that determines the choices we make (well part of it). So yea, read along and I hope you get my drift.

N.B: This was posted on my church's youth whatsapp group and I decided to share here.

Enjoy...

Relationships are failing today because so many boyfriends are being treated like husbands.

You’ve heard the phrase that says, “why buy the cow, if the milk is free?”

The same goes with relationships. Why would a man marry a

woman who already treats him like a husband? You should ask yourself that question.

Many women believe that a man must be treated like a husband in order to get a ring from him, but that’s not true. A man just has to know that you’re capable of being a wife.

He needs to know that you’re loving, caring, nurturing, honest, and trustworthy.

He has to know that you have the character of a wife.

If he makes you believe that he needs you to cook, clean, do his laundry, have sex on demand and let him live with you in order for him to marry you, then he’s not a real man-- he’s a grown boy and he’s not looking for a wife, he’s looking for another mother.

A real man can handle his own and will bring his own to the table. He wants to show you his character and he wants to see yours.

All the acts of service that happen in between the character aren’t as important as character itself.

You don’t have to know how to cook, because you can learn together. You don’t have to know how to clean, because you can learn together. A wife isn’t a maid. A wife is a teammate.

He should be able to stand on his own two feet, and you should be able to stand on yours.

Don’t bend over backwards to get a man or to keep a man. Let him meet you halfway. Don’t give all of yourself and get nothing in return.

Be a good woman and let him work for your love. When he gives you his love, reciprocate.

A word, they say, is enough for the wise... He who has ears, ......... you know the remaining.

Signing out

SPEND LESS, LOOK GOOD SERIES

2016-04-29T10:39:00.000+00:00

Yo, wagwan?

Ki lo n pop?

Ki lo n sele?

How di do?

E we so o...

What's happening?

Yea, I had a bottle of coke this morning so I am feeling a bit on the high side...

Thank God Its Fridayyyyyyy..... whoop whooop... Even Friday for me is Sunday cos my Saturdays are my Mondays (you get my drift yea?)

So what spendless post do I have today?

For the vigilant people here, you will notice the ankara I used to make this dress is the same one from my Ankara Inspired look... You didn't notice shey? Oya check HERE.

I got the inspiration for the dress some time back. I remember I always wanted to have a straight pinafore (well, I went to a christian Secondary School and they felt wearing a straight uniform would show your curves too much...which is a SIN!!!!!!).

I got two different ankara material (1 yard of the one on top and 2 yards of the one below) and gave it to my adorable tailor to make me a STRAIGHT pinafore.

Seeing I was wearing it to church (workers in my church are not allowed to wear an armless dress), I decided to pair with a white shirt.

And my adorable nude Christian Louboutin I got as valentine's gift last year...

I liked the combo and everyone did... Do you like? or like? Heehehe

I will be doing more spendless post on how to pair your clothes also so you don't start to think that its only ankara you can use to look good and not break the bank... eyin e ma worry (don't worry). See ya soon

Cheers...

#SERIES - ANKARA INSPIRED LOOK 2

2016-04-27T06:00:00.000+00:00

Hey guys.

Are you all not surprised?

I am on a blogging all-day spirit o..kai. We praise God.

So what ankara inspired look do I have for us today?

If there's anyone trying some ankara inspired makeup, I would really love to see. Please send me pictures o... I am interested.

In other news, if you are interested in learning makeup and gele tying, don't hesitate to call me. Makeup classes are starting first week in May. Call me on 08087646638 or send me a mail on moby.amusu@gmail.com. Ese modupe,. We are very affordable *winks*.

So, I saw this ankara some time ago and it was speaking all kinds of languages to me... I decided to buy it...and after I did this look, I gave my tailor to make a dress for me. I will be putting up a spendless post tomorrow. My tailor is good.. *free advert*

EYES

Innocence (silver/ white *confused.com*) from Sleek eye dust

Red from Ushas palette (from my last look)

Black from sleek bad girl palette

Maybelline colossal kajal

Amazing shine eye lash

Maybelline colossal volume express mascara for the top lash

Milani mascara for the bottom lash

LIPS

Milani colour statement lipliner 08

Milani lipstick in nude (removed the tag long time ago so I can't remember the name *covers face*)

LIPS

Mac lipstick - rubywoo

BH Cosmetics waterproof liner - Retro

FACE

BH Cosmetics liquid foundation

BH cosmetics camouflage concealer to highlight my face

Sleek face contour palette in Dark

Ben Nye banana powder

Milani bronzer

Wine in Ushas blush palette

As I always say, nothing major was used in achieving this look so you can try it out. I decided to use a different foundation for this look.. No major reason... I was just in the mood for a water based foundation... You can use your regular foundation. Send me pictures o..ehn ehn.

And always remember, the best makeup you ever have on is your smile... smile.

Cheers...

MY WORST DECISION EVER WAS GOING NATURAL

2016-04-26T11:26:00.000+00:00

Why do I feel Ati would see my post title and just faint...hahahaha.
Please read the post first o before we all faint.

Hello mi boos.
No owanbe download today because I don't go for owanbes anymore *sad face*. My party clothes has finished and all my shoes are begging to rest.
Truthfully, I think I am tired of anything rice and I am trying to take it easy with my sugar consumption...so most weekends, I am at home, or in another person's house or on the street looking for money (not prostitute kind o..hehe).
So, I went natural in January, 2014... no one pushed me to it. I just did it.

But natural hair enthusiasts are always very quick to tell you about the glories of rocking your natural hair (I did not mention names o...where is Abieyuwa sef..hehe). Aby didn't let me rest. Many of them will tell you about how good it feels being liberated from relaxers and how taking care of your natural hair isn’t so hard. Now I am becoming them *arghhh*

Well let me tell you about some things they never remember to tell you.

There will be tears, and even blood sometimes.

When you wake up already late for an important meeting, and your bantu just end up looking like you haven’t run a comb through your hair in months, there will definitely be tears. And when you are struggling with detangling your hair, and you rip out some of it that’s tied up in a knot, there’ll be blood - ok, maybe not. Last week Thursday, I planned on washing my hair and then I slept off...I woke up in the middle of the night to wash it cos I had an early morning on Friday. No jokes. I was grumbling all through and didn't bother detangling. The amount of hair that fell off while I was combing...story for another day.
Patience is the key...patience is the key...patience is the master key. Magical hair growth can not happen overnight. If you like, use HairInfinity till Jesus returns, your hair will grow at its own pace.
It can be expensive. I hear alot of people say going natural is cheap... Aunty na lie. It is not cheap at all... I can't even start to explain...
It’ll annoy you a lot.

You are going to wake up on some days, and feel like heading straight to the salon to relax it.
You might use the same products as your friend, Tomi, who inspired you to natural, and even go to the same salons as her, but you hair will probably never look like hers. This is because curl patterns are a thing, and everyone has theirs. So as much as you love Tomi’s hair, you’ll learn to love yours more.

All in all, going natural is great and it might take you a while to get used to it, but the results are always worth it.

Can you relate?

THE WORD FOR TODAY - ENJOY THE JOURNEY

2016-04-24T05:30:00.000+00:00

Today’s Scripture

“But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day.”

(Proverbs 4:18, ESV

TODAY'S WORD

Oftentimes, people tend to get wrapped up and busy with things that don’t really matter in eternity. It’s easy to get consumed by your career and stay focused on your goals. It’s good to work hard, but you’ve got to learn how to play hard, too, so that you can stay in balance. I heard somebody say, “It’s not that life is so short, it’s that we wait so long to begin living.” If we want to truly enjoy the journey of life, we have to take time to stop and smell the roses. Do you appreciate the people you love? Do you hug your children before you leave each day and give your spouse a kiss? When was the last time you called your parents to tell them how much you love them? That’s how we can enjoy the journey.

If you’ll stay determined to enjoy the journey of life, you’ll live with no regrets. You’ll see your path shine brighter and brighter, and at the end, you’ll be able to say, “I made the most of my life. I enjoyed my family. I enjoyed my friends. I finished my course with joy.”

A Prayer for Today

“Father, thank You for the people You have placed in my life. Teach me to enjoy my relationships more because they are all that matter in eternity. Help me to enjoy the journey of life as my path shines brighter and brighter until the full day in Jesus’ name

SOURCE: Joel and Victoria Osteen

SPENDLESS, LOOK GOOD

2016-04-21T08:46:00.003+00:00

Action!

Afrojuju Mobylizers Igba tiwa lode… (don’t let me continue singing…LOL…)

Yup it’s your gurl…..and I’m keeping it real

I told you I was back shey.... yaaaay. I have loads of time now so I can do everything planned to, I plan to, and will plan to….*wink*

So I have always had this idea...from Uni.

Story story...(lemme see those that went to correct primary schools LOL)

So you all know my grass to grace story...( mainly Mobylizers that have been following this blog since I started it), and If you don’t, you are welcome I’ll recap later…

Well, when I got admission into uni, I had nothing. My sister, Lola, and I got into college at the same time and my mum's least worry was getting us clothes. So we went to meet this cousin of ours who was Yabatech's best dresser, Sewande, and was a lot bigger than us (about a size 16 or so) and asked her to give us her old clothes. I am fatter than my sister and I was a size a size 8 so you understand the irony.

That meant we had loads of amending, slim fitting and textile liposuction to do. We amended the clothes ourselves...with needle and thread *the hustle was real* and we rocked it like that and guess what * pops collar* I was nominated for best dressed in 100 level..funny shey * big grin*. But I think that brought out the “spend-less” side of me. I knew at that point I could piece things together and make it look very good.

There was no where I went to I wasn’t honored as the best dressed or at least told I dress well...not bragging o. When I started working, I had a mix of everything; the very expensive, the regular and the ‘cheapey’ (like Tijani would say).

One day, my colleague saw the way I combined a piece of clothing and he said he liked it... I looked at what I wore and I realized *covers face* I bought the top at katangora (how dem dey spell dat place sef?) and the skirt was a gift and the shoe, I got on sale during the Jumia black Friday sales. I told my colleague the price of everything I wore and I knew it wasn't up to 3k. I am not cheap skate o... I just know good things when I see it... And that was how spend-less was born *big grin part 2*

I am tired of hearing girls complain about not having money hence the reason they get to sleep with men so they can afford some things..*thumbs down*. I know this girl; I won’t mention names in case she sees this, who believes she can't do anything without sleeping with someone. She can’t buy aso ebi if she doesn’t sleep with a man or the groom's brother, or the bride’s brother, so she can get it free. I didn't attend a friend's wedding some days ago because the price of the aso ebi was enough to buy a new makeup box and 1 mac lipstick and sponsor a child in Somalia to grade 6..(straight face)... I want people to feel good and look good without having to break the bank or get their backs broken by men…*Angel mode activated*

So on a weekly basis, I would have a spend-less inspirational post...where I get to piece something together, state the price and hopefully someone gets inspired. But wait ooo, minus my shoes o... I go all out for my shoes... yes I do…*smile*

Do you know there's blessing in giving... It’s true. I gave out 2 pairs of shoes last year...one to a blog visitor and one to a random person and I got 3 pairs of shoes in return...free!. I heard from someone that if you give out something you really love, you get back in double folds. Put God to the test...it works. Nobody should dare ask me for my shoes o..*straight face*... most especially my brown sandals that I love...hehe. It is not going anywhere*evil grin*…On second thought, I could actually give it out o... *covers face*.

So for my first spend-less post..., I wore this to church last week Sunday.

I saw this cool ankara and I bought it, 2 thousand naira for 3 yards. I think that's affordable. You could go for a cheaper material though. My tailor charged me 1 thousand 5 hundred naira for it... I know it could be cheaper or more expensive depending on your tailor.

The scarf was a gift from my mum years ago... it is just one velvet material like that. I am worth 3 thousand 5 hundred naira in this picture... I didn't have to break a bank and I got over 5 people take picture of it...

You like? or you like?

Have a Spend-less week ahead!

Cheers

#SERIES - ANKARA INSPIRED LOOK

2016-04-20T06:00:00.000+00:00

Which do you prefer? A, B or C?

Hey lovelies.. Wagwan?

I have decided to take this blog serious... be yinmu-ing o... I will prove you wrong... God help me.

So the day before yesterday, I saw this lovely ankara material in the office and I decided to do a makeover on my face based on colours on the ankara... and in the process, I had a revelation *hahahah*...so I decided to do 3 different lip colour to see which goes well with this look. I put up pictures on my Instagram and everyone seemed to like A most... I love C.

To everyone that voted A, well done o... Thank you so much.

If you like this look and you want to try it out, I didn't go overboard with the products. I used very affordable products.

For my face, I used

Mary Kay Foundation - 507 and 607

L.A Pro concealer in Fawn

Ben Nye banana powder to set my highlights

Sleek contour palette in dark

Milani blush

Milani bronzer

(nothing out of this world...and very affordable)

Y'all know what baking is shey? hahaha

For my eyes, I used

Fuschia pink from an Ushas eye shadow palette I bought for 800 naira last year *covers face*

BH Party girl gold eyeshadow

Black eyeshadow from Sleek badgirl eyeshadow palette

Zaron black liner

Maybelline kajal

For my lips,

Jordana pencil in blue

NYX Jumbo pencil in milk (yea I improvised...hehe)

Lips - Classic lipstick in Nude

Lips

Classic lipstick in Isabella

Mac lip liner in Black

Which look do you prefer?

If you say A, I will not buy sweet for you?

Hehehe.....

WEEKEND DOWNLOAD - WE ARE OPEN FOR BUSINESS

2016-04-19T11:49:00.001+00:00

Love $_$

The rays from the sun penetrated through my window curtains, and landed on my face, causing me put an abrupt end to my sweet, though un-comfortable sleep (NEPA did not feature in the nights crashing LOL). After plenty turning, rolling and stretching, I finally got out of bed, said my thank you – good morning prayers and as I looked at my phone, I saw it was 6.54 am, APRIL 16^th!.............APRIL 16^th was finally here...The day I have dreamt of almost all my life.....The day I have been looking forward to since the beginning of this year......The day Moby Impressionz Make-up Studio is opened officially......YAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!................thanks be to God.

I fully got up and out of the room by 7.am, which meant I had exactly 6 hours to the official launch time. It was like someone just pressed fast forward somewhere... I started moving like Flash, trying to get things done. I had to Iron shirts for Moby Impressionz crew members ( Nepa had received brain...LOL), then arrange and re-arrange my make-up box, then clean the house a bit, then did my make-up...PHEW!....ee no easy.

Tito had gone out very early to look for fuel so we had to wait for him a while (This fuel wahala sef can like to want to cause yawa). At about 10.30 –ish, he was back...and yes he got fuel *big grin*.

My parents were the first to arrive, and Iya Dayo brought chicken and Moi-moi, and Daddy brought some more drinks. The launch was already looking very perfect and for like the first time in my life, I wasn’t worrying at a major event. I was calm, happy and confident in God that all would be well.

Soon after, people started arriving and lending helping hands so less stress for me. My decorator and bestie, Bimbo, arrived and she worked her magic.

cutest

Did I mention, my god daughter came too, Leah... she is so adorable. Her mum took these lovely pictures. Yes she is talented. She is the CEO of Black-Grey-White Studios. Super mom.

I can just kidnap her

My Pastor got there late.. Why? FUEL... What's up with this fuel situation na. Oga Buhari, abeg give us light and fuel ASAP or else we all will go Bruce lee on your Hausa a$$...hehe.

Anyway, not too long after, he arrived with his lovely wife and immediately, the event started. Was I nervous? Honestly I don’t know. I was just there sha...LOL.

After the plenty prayer and blessings, it was time for Donation... you know na,..as a Lagos babe (*clears throat*...if you haven't made your donations yet, it is not late ooo...Ehen). *YAAY*!!!!!...We have money now (if I am owing you money, ping me now lemme pay my debt...hehe..just joking o).

My new banner

My sister is the bombest. She made this very lovely cake for me...she is good. I know it looks good but it tasted even better..hehe. It felt like my birthday + My wedding reception + my graduation +.......LOL.

cake plus iced tea = 8888

Why do I think some of y'all are angry with me?

Okay truthfully I was going to invite everyone... I swear but I didn't think it was a big deal. I just wanted my pastor to come over, pray and everyone goes home until Tito suggested having a small party and my mum was drawing up programme for the event and my sister suggested cake and everyone was suggesting.... and I didn't have enough cash...

Truthfully. I had a budget of 40 people but people were just turning up. I am so sorry guys...please forgive me. We will have a big party soon...don't worry. When we move to our permanent site na. I promise.

Throw pillows courtesy House of Muse

Tito, Dabs, Titi, Moby, Adeola and Christian

Team on point

meet Dr. Dami... see her cute face... mwahhhhh

PAUSE!!!!......

Did I mention that I had stopped working... Yep I quit my job...or I was fired.. both sha... Story for another day..

One of my dreams has finally come through....God did it!!!! Halleluya.

Ignore stomach...had loads of junk *covers face*

As tired as I was, I still had to go for karaoke at my sister's karaoke bar... e no easy.

Moby Impressionz make-up studio is now open and running at No. 1 Fadeyi Street (beside holy trinity Hospital), off Awolowo road, Ikeja. Everything make-up is available just for you and to your taste.

Our services include;

· Bridal / bridal party Make-up

· Instant make –over

· Regular / daily look

· Gele tying

· Traditional make-up

· Movie / cinema make-up

We also have regular classes / training in make-up artistry, helping interested persons become professional make-up artists.

For enquiries:

+234-8087646638, 7011209592

Moby.amusu@gmail.com

In other news, I have loads of plans for my instagram followers... Someone will win a free makeover before the end of April so if you are not following us yet, alele go and follow the ladder @mz_moby

Thank you Mobylizers for your support.....I know I have offended you all too many times with this my on and off spirit but you keep forgiving me. God bless you all and may all our dreams come through in Jesus Christs name. Amen.

Have a wonderful week...

Cheers...

MY FOOTBALL DRAMA

2016-03-30T17:25:00.003+00:00

Hello my MOBYLIZING MOBYLIZERS...
Ayam getting my blogging groove back already o like play like play.
Praise be to God Almighty... hehe

So I took the time out to watch football yesterday... The Egypt vs Nigeria match where they whooped our a**. Apparently, it is not as boring as I thought.
You want to enjoy football? Try watching football with the not-so-rich people. You'd definately enjoy it more. And I sure did. The peeps I watched the match with inspired this post.

I came to a conclusion that it is very hard watching football without uttering a single word. At a point,I started talking too *weird*.

And I came to another conclusion that there are different kinds of people that watch football and I have put them into categories. I am sure you'd know which you belong to at the end of this post.

*clears throat*

The one that always suspect that the referee has been bribed - I think this happens only in Nigeria where we suspect everyone that is not working/ acting according to what we expect. There was this particular guy that all he said through out was the refree was bribed by Egypt... like seriously? Is it possible that the guy was only doing his job the right way?

THE ANALYST -Oh no... I had to ask if it was possible that the coach didn't know his job and that there are other ways to coach cos it seemed everyone knew better than the coach and the players. Pass the ball, push it... what is wrong with this one na..don't you know you should have passed the ball... stand up.. fall down... We had more people in this category. Everyone knew better.

THE NOISE MAKERS - Oh yea... So many analyst fall under this category but the difference is these ones had nothing to say and they had everything to say. Lord God Almighty. I wish I had a gun or a cellotape. I would either shoot them or just tape their mouth. I taya.

THE QUIET ONES - These ones are scary. They give off a boko haram feel... No jokes. I was scared watching these ones. They said nothing through out. NOTHING. Just watched the match and stepped out afterwards. No opinion added or subtracted... I'll watch out for these ones next time.. I need to analyse them.

THE CLASS CAPTAIN - Hahahaha... These ones are the funniest. They are always the ones shouting "O ti to... Its enough. Everyone shussh. Shut up. Keep quiet". They just wanted to watch the match and enjoy it after all. They almost started writing the names of noise makers... hehe

THE FOOTBALLER... If you watch these ones closely, they play football alongside the real footballers. They move their heads,their legs, their hands all the time and make funny faces... talk about playing in the spirit.

THE BABALAWO- these ones can curse and predict for Africa. They knew where the ball was going to, who was going to kick the ball next and Mikel Obi was cursed the most. They looked like this

At the end of the day, it was fun watching the match.
So where do you belong?

I'm sure a lot of you are wondering if I was watching the match or watching everyone. I did watch the match. Durrrhhh...
I think Mikel Obi is hot but lazy... always quick to pass the ball and Moses is my boo for life. I think the Egyptian players (make sense?) were mean but they played well. I think the super eagles played good also but there was something about them that I still can't place. I think the best way to score is by corner kick *clears throat*. And I think I should marry Moses cos the boo is sexily hot *covers face*

Who else watched the match? What do you think?

THE NEW GENERATION WHORING (SMW)

2016-03-29T07:13:00.002+00:00

So who followed the #Dubai trend on twitter over the weekend? I know some people have no idea what I am talking about.

Well, I forgive you. That's why I am here anyways.

SMW means Social Media Whoring. This post reminds me of the 90s popular '2 girls and a cup' porn... yea I watched that one. Please don't tell my mum.

The next time you’re tempted to like a girl’s selfie on Facebook or write a slobbering comment about how good she looks on her Instagram page, just think of DUBAI PORTA POTTIES and smile.

Want to know what that means, then please pull a chair, grab your popcorn and read on.

Have you ever wondered how popular Instagram models can afford their lavish lifestyles? I do... thanks to my stalking abilities *covers face*. Selfies showing off expensive cars, bags, yet they all work low-paid jobs as human hair sellers or even makeup artists *yes makeup artists*. You probably figured a guy was paying for their Louis Vuitton purses and trips but you didn’t know the sheer depths these girls would sink to for a few bucks.
Instagram model means prostitute, they might as well start to put their rates under the pictures because they won’t be fooling anyone for much longer. As it turns out, most, if not all, Instagram models make their living by being "sponsored," meaning they get paid to fly to Dubai and have sex with an Arab guy and ten of his best buddies. But these hoes don’t simply rent their pussies out for cash: they engage in some of the most disgusting sex acts you can imagine. Yes this is real. Here is how it is done.

There would be a "model recruiter" who gets paid to find girls who are basically willing to whore themselves out to rich Saudis with oil money. The Saudis pay anywhere from $10,000 to as much as $50,000 per girl for each trip which last anywhere from a weekend up to 2 weeks and they basically sleep with these girls multiple times a day with just about every fetish you could imagine including pooping/peeing on the girls. The Saudis take pride in pooping/peeing on the girls and more often than not, they make personal bets and hold contests to see who can get the most liquidy poop to drop on the girls faces and the winner gets to choose the next vacation spot and gets to pick his girls first.

Now this is termed "Dubai porta potties".

The truth is, we’ve slid all the way to Sodom and Gomorrah. Here we have an entire class of women who are so lacking in decency that they’ll shove salmon up their vaginas so they can afford to shop at Saks Fifth Avenue. A civilization where women sell themselves, not even to survive, but for frivolous luxury items.

And the worst part is after taking a shitty facial from an arab and getting paid, these girls will fly back home and pretend they're goddesses after some firm rationalization. She's the same girl you will meet next week and go out to dinner with and would withhold sex from you to convince you she's a treasure.

The Instagram models have sipped from a poisoned chalice. Their souls are being warped by the repulsive acts their sponsors make them do. Even if they luck out and manage to find a man who will marry them knowing what they’ve done, the memories of the sick acts they’ve committed will haunt them for the rest of their lives.

In the specific case of these Arab sheiks, these are men who are wealthier and more privileged than the kings of old. But instead of using their fortunes to advance science, culture or philosophy, they pay women to have sex with German shepherds. They are degenerates in every sense of the word, fools who have squandered a great gift on pointless hedonism.

There are good women out there, yes, but its situations like this that make people say that women do not deserve worship or respect because women have degenerated themselves to a very sorry level. Women now like to flatter themselves by thinking that all they need to do is show up, look hot and men will do all that they want .

And so, in the case of the Instagram models, there’s no reason to be intimidated by beautiful women. That drop-dead gorgeous girl you’re crushing on is likely getting paid to have a Saudi sheik shit on her nose and watch it drip down her chin. She's getting a DUBAI PORTA POTTIES.
*Can't deal no more... I give up*
g
SOURCE: Tag the Sponsor
Culled by Moby.

HOW JEALOUS DO YOU GET?

2016-03-25T05:00:00.000+00:00

According to Webster Dictionary, Jealous is being defined as Vigilant in guarding a possession or disposed to suspect rivalry or unfaithfulness.

For example, a friend of mine told me her boyfriend told her he gets jealous when people look at her (both guys and girls). He even went as far as saying when they get married, she'd start covering her face... ehn well I do not know what her response was but that's an amazing amount of jealousy. ~~I know I live for the stares. I get satisfied when I know people are staring at me...hehehe~~

But how far can your jealousy get?

I was reading a post some time last week and I saw a picture of a woman that was beaten black and blue by her boyfriend (please note not husband) because he thought she was too much for him and he was undeserving of her.*both arms on head*... Now this Aunty went on her social media and says "My man will only beat me because he loves me. If he doesn't get jealous then it means he doesn't love me". GBAM.... WORD. This Aunty is on point. I can end my post here seeing we have learnt something new. Or rather two new things.

1. Your man will only beat you if he loves you.

2. Your partner will only get jealous because he loves you.

Alright guys..

Have a wonderful good Friday.

Peace... *straight face*

~~Why do I feel Lizzy is about to explode now~~? Hahahaha

Let's be serious now *straight face again*.

I read that post and I made a wish in my mind. I said "Lord God please let me meet this aunty or anyone that belongs to this school of thought so I can slap sense into their heads". Please if you are a Mobylizer and you believe the number 1 above, please call me.. let's have a chat so we can arrange a date for you SLAP!...LOL

It's no big deal for anyone to get jealous. As a matter of fact, if you don't love something or care about someone, you wouldn't give a hoot about what they do but when it becomes physical abuse, then that's bad. We hear of acid pouring cases, hot water drenching cases... even as bad as killing your partner.. hmmmm

Back to today's post. If you've ever been jealous over anything or anyone, raise up your hand please.

I have.. durhhh.

I like to see myself as a very jealous person...if and only if I like you. Yes I get jealous but I don't show it. When Moby says "IT IS FINE...DON'T WORRY", it is not fine o. Just run for your life.. but how far can I go with my jealousy? Truth is I can never hit anyone (have you seen me? I weigh 141 pounds and I am 5 ft 4 inches tall... I am definitely not a fighter...*puppy eyes*). I can break up with you sha. But I can't kill myself or anyone. I can't even kill a cockroach...True Story Mhen! Y'all remember the cockroach that almost killed me shey... If not, read it HERE.

Its okay for anyone to get jealous over something or someone they care about but beating or inflicting harm is just not acceptable.

Another dimension is stalking over jealousy...aka 'team snoop' *grin* How many people have stalked their partner(s) or maybe even their ex out of jealousy?

Raise your hands up... I see you. Yes you.. I know na

I do.

Everyone does. Thanks to social media. So if ever at some point we were friends, I confess I have checked you out on all social media platform.

I want to know how far you can go cos of jealousy, like what's the worst you'd do? Let's talk.

In other news, a lot of people showed interest in our movie hang out o... what are we going to do? Ehnnnnn... Lemme be thinking *put on thinking cap...brb*

TRUE

DEAR MOBY

2016-03-23T06:00:00.000+00:00

Hellluuurrrr *in my strangest Madea's voice*

How y'all doing?

You know Moby is back when you get a Dear Moby series in a week *covers face*. Feels so good to be back.

What's crackalacking?

MY MOOD RIGHT NOW? Mixed emotions.

I made a major life decision yesterday... nope I executed a major life changing decision yesterday. I should be happy about it but I made the decision months ago but I executed it 9 days earlier than I should have and I feel down tintin ni (small)... but I am happy I made the decision. I can see lots of people waiting to hear the gist... ntorrr. The decoders are trying to decode the gist... na lie. I am not telling anyborri... hehe.

Okay..... what do I have today?

I saw this picture while I was away and I was very angry at first until I decided to drink very cold water and use wisdom.

The message reads "Stop giving men money...A man is not a man if he has to KEEP ASKING a woman for money."

Okay maybe the designer of the message was a lil bit harsh but here's my opinion.

I have no problem giving my man money. Its no big deal. I would do it a million times over if I have to. I mean we are supposed to be a team right?. I cover your shame, you cover mine.

I heard a story of a man that didn't have a job for close to 2 years but no one in the man's or woman's family knew cos the woman would send money on behalf of the guy to them... buy stuff in the house... Basically covered the man's shame till he got a job *that's my kinda woman...she's the baddest*

But the word KEEP ASKING is what I have a problem with.

When I was staying with my mum, there was this neighbor of ours that their case was out of this world. The wife was doing about three jobs... She worked in a bakery, she was a tailor and she was working another job. But her husband was lazy AF. He would wake up, stretch his leg around the neighborhood (he does that so that he wouldn't be there when the wife is setting the dinning table for breakfast). He comes back expecting breakfast (and he gets it...thanks to wifey). When she's going out, she drops money for him...Then he sleeps all day... wakes up and goes to the viewing centre to watch football and drink with the cash wifey dropped.

Now my point is its okay for a woman to give money to her man but if he keeps asking without showing any effort of trying to make money then he stops being the man... the woman is already the man if she has to take care of the house. I tell people 'atleast show that you're trying.... fake it till you make it". Some men just irritate me... they are lazy and they are proud of it. They gossip like women, gist like women and do nothing all day. I have plenty of them in my estate. I didn't mention names o *picks up slippers incase I need to run*

That's my own one piece... just my own thought.

I want to read your thought.

Should a man collect money from his woman and does that make him any less of a man?

Let's talk.

HOW TO BE SINGLE

2016-03-21T15:33:00.003+00:00

Hello Mobylizers

So today, I decided to blog whore a little and I checked out the boo's blog (Berry Dakara).... ~~She has no idea how much I love her~~ and this post caught my attention and I have decided to share with y'all. Please check out her blog. She is amazing and I just can't get enough of her gorgeousness.

I decided to share this post because I can totally relate. There's just too much pressure on ladies to get married that we all truly forget the essence of marriage. A friend of mine got married at 20 (immediately after Uni) because her mum just wanted to have a grandchild and she was the only child (the irony of it all is she is still not preggo).

I was talking to her early last year and she said 'I WISH I CHILLED... I am tired already' and then she decided to go in deep about her marriage. Marriage is beautiful, no doubt, but you need to be prepared mentally and emotionally to handle it.

Anyway, read Berry's post and let's talk in the comment section.

Hi everyone,

Cakes (Cakes is the hubby) and I went on an impromptu date a few weeks ago, and the 2 movie options were Deadpool and How to Be Single. I feel like most times we go to the movies, we end up watching an action film, so I really wanted to watch a chick flick.

When I was single (pun intended), I mostly watched Chick Flicks, Rom-Coms, and ALWAYS Superhero movies. In this instance though, I wanted to go for something light and funny, so How to Be Single was the choice. It wasn't a bad movie - there was laughter in some scenes. However, I didn't know it was rated R - there was A LOT of random hooking up (sex o) and F-bombs everywhere. That aside. It made me think about my life before I met Cakes.

In our culture, there's a pressure on females to start looking for husbands once they turn 20, or are getting ready to graduate from the University. I certainly felt that pressure and in fact, fasting and prayer sessions were held on my behalf once I turned 25 with no Mr Right in sight. I didn't see what all the fuss was about. I knew I would get married eventually, so I just wasn't interested in the jumping up and down. I didn't meet Cakes until 2/3 months before my 30th birthday and we got married when I was 31. And no, I wasn't worried that while turning 30, I didn't have a boyfriend. So what? I was enjoying my life. I went out to different restaurants BY MYSELF, watched movies BY MYSELF, even wanted to travel by myself (but my family's concern for safety overshadowed that plan). One of my biggest regrets is that I was not "allowed" to live on my own. I cried and argued and begged but the powers-that-be (Mummy and Daddy) dissuaded me. All I know is my future daughter(s) WILL live in their own apartment. Anyway, the point is that I was having fun as a single gal.

Isn't she gorgeous?

Too many females today are living their lives in a substandard manner, with the excuse of "I'm not married." They say when they get married then their lives will be complete. When they get married they'll be happy. When they get married, this or that will happen... I'm here to tell them (or you) to STOP!

Stop waiting for life to happen to you! Discover yourself, date yourself, and do the things that interest YOU! You don't need to wait for a life-mate to enjoy yourself. You like cooking? Cook up a storm and invite your friends over. You like dancing? Turn on some music and dance like nobody's watching! You like watching movies? Hey, no date means you can concentrate on the movie completely. You like to travel? Go on a group tour or trip - there are quite a number in Nigeria now. The possibilities are endless! The way to be single is to DO YOU, ENJOY YOURSELF, LIVE YOUR LIFE!

The end.

MOBY SPEAKS

I loved being single. Kai... Really I did. Even though it was for a short while but I loved every part of it. Going to the movies till late, hanging out with friends without feeling the need to explain who is who...it was amazing.

Singles, please enjoy your life and don't be pressurized by family and friends. No one should limit you at all and the best part is you can serve God without distractions.

And stop believing all the instagram and facebook pictures. Some of them are just acting. You don't want to know the story of some people in a relationship. True words. You even get to know a lot about yourself while single. I started loving myself more when I was single. Y'all think Moby is confident and has high self esteem and this and that....na lie. I was the timid girl that never spoke a word in the crowd. I learnt to be the real me when I was single.

Enough said.

Have a wonderful week ahead Mobylizers... Me love y'all.

P.S: I am planning a movie hangout this weekend. If you're single and wanna hang out, let's do that. You know how we do it. Send me a mail at moby.amusu @gmail.com with subject mail INTERESTED.

Mwahhhhh....

THE GIRL STRUGGLE WAS REAL

2016-03-19T05:00:00.000+00:00

It is hard too..hehe

Sup...sup..sup ma niggas.

First, happy first mobylizing weekend.

Everything we are doing here now is new o.. Feeling like I just came back from jand..hehe.

I met a Mobylizer yesterday at an event and you all needed to have seen her face when she saw me. She said "Moby mentioned me on the blog o" and she was so happy that I was back to blogging. I was feeling so inspired ehn. I decided to put up a post today because of Deola and I hope when next she sees me, she gives me an iphone 6 ~~cos I have mentioned her on the blog twice in one week~~ *covers face*.

Kisses huni.

So what do I have for us today?

While I was gone on my sabbatical, I was inspired to do this post. I read something similar on a website and I decided to do a Moby version *you know how we do it na* so let's get to it.

I know a few guys can totally relate to it but all my sisters in the house will understand. Where my sistas at?

The beauty struggle for us women has been real since the beginning of time. I remember struggling with my mum over this particular green lipstick that turns red after application. I'm sure some of y'all used that lipstick.

If you know this lipstick, say AMEN... You don old

And then the issue of using lipgloss so you could impress your crush buh she gave you this instead

Kaii...why evulls mama

I know some of y'all used vaseline but robb gave your lips a damp feeling and didn't shine a lot like vaseline. I would know this cos I used both *ntoi*.

Here are some beauty habits you probably forgot you had in secondary school.

Using wet lips so generously, it always looked like it would drip under the hot sun. So I won't lie, Moby had a crush in Secondary School and she did this to impress him well. I stole my sister's lipgloss (Absolute was the reigning lipgloss then...that thing can like to shine) when I saw the robb Iya Dayo gave me wasn't working well
Buying “Tony Montanna” or “Enchateur”

SOURCE

Using clear nail polish on our nails even if they never really made a difference because coloured polish wasn’t allowed. I used to put groundnut oil on my nails to make it shiny though *shaking my head for me*
And everybody had this one.Putting a little attachment in your cornrows thinking you looked like Alicia Keys, while it really made no difference.

Putting beauty marks on your face cos we thought it was cute. Well I think it is cute cos I still do it sha *covers face*

I have been laughing at myself since. Can't deal mehn... All this for a boy shey? If you did this at any point in your life, get a mirror, look at yourself and ask "was the boy worth it?". Hahahaha.

Ayam looking for a mirror now..when I find it, I will ask myself and come back to give y'all the reply.

Brb....

I HAVE A STINKY HOO-HA

2016-03-17T10:46:00.002+00:00

You know Moby is back to Blogsville when you start seeing things like this. Hahahaha...

I can imagine some people's faces like "ehn mgbo Moby has a smelly down-below".

Let me digress a bit.

I was talking to a friend of mine sometime and I asked her what other nick names she calls her Vagina (using medical terms here before Pastor will call me out during worker's meeting) and she said SOUTH PARK.

Erhmmmm Okay... makes sense right?

I have 6 major names I call mine... ~~Down-below, Hoo-ha, p&*&y, VJJ and ******* (can't be written on this blog and Hullabalu~~. This is a holy ground. Hehehe.

Okay so let's get to today's post.

A lot of ladies at one point in their lives have smelt a foul odor coming from their Hoo-ha. If you lie, if you lie kperen, you will go to hell fire...hahaha

Studies have shown that 40 to 50 percent of women will have Bacterial Vaginosis or a yeast infection at some point within their childbearing years. Yep it’s true. What inspired this post? I am very smell sensitive (English scholar what’s the general name o), reason I don't kiss upanda. Once you have a mouth odor, I pass *true story*.

So I passed by a female colleague at work some days ago and I smelt her hullabalu. All of you will say hmmnnn now but well I did smell something but I didn't say anything o.

I cannot come and go and chop slap.

I have noticed that the problem with we ladies is that when these symptoms pop up, most of us just assume it’s nothing and use any antibiotics hopeful it would work and then we grow frustrated when they don’t go away because you never even had a yeast infection to begin with. You’ve prolonged your own agony.

I think, unfortunately, all women think any time their VJJ itches, it’s a yeast infection but in reality, the only commonality between Bacterial Vaginosis (BV) and a yeast infection would be itching. Yeast infections don’t smell, and BV does have a distinct smell. Another big difference is that the white cottage cheesy discharge of a yeast infection isn’t present with BV. So if you itch, call a doctor... you’ll fast-track your treatment and save yourself some uncomfortable days.

NOTE: You’ll Need an Antibiotic

There are two ways to treat BV which can be an oral antibiotic which you take twice a day for seven days or a vaginal treatment which you insert into the vagina at bedtime for five nights.

Ask your doctor for the ones best for you.

Which one’s best?

That really depends on your preference.

Most ladies prefer the by-mouth dose but if you have a sensitive stomach, you might want to opt for the down-there application as some antibiotics can sometimes upset the stomach.

HOW DOES MOBY KNOW ALL THIS?

durhhh... my face as you're thinking about the kweshion

I read. I work in a Hospital and I belong to the 50 percent of women that will suffer (or have suffered) from BV or a yeast infection.

Incase you have any question, ask me and I will ask Dr. Dami (she'll kill me when she sees this though)

LESSON LEARNT: Don't be scared to talk about changes you notice in your down-below. It might be a symptom of something very serious and it might be too late by the time you talk. Then ask people. I remember once, my sister asked if I ever smelt anything fishy around her. It was an uncomfortable moment but I had to answer… which is none of y’alls business. hehe..

There are other disease that can cause a smelly hoo-ha but for the reason of this post, I decided to talk about just two of them.

I feel very smart right now... I should go and open my own Hospital with the knowledge I have.

Off to look for a piece of land...

Peace out.... mwahhh

THIS ISN'T GOODBYE 2

2016-03-16T12:47:00.003+00:00

*CLEARS THROAT*

*peeps in*

*one leg in*

Oh nooo... my heart is beating faster than normal. Why am I scared to blog? This is my baby and I am scared to cuddle her.. noooooo.

I know why I am scared. I am scared of giving up again. I do not want to have a major breakdown again and leave. I always leave when I can't figure things out. Its like my coping mechanism. I leave. Its not cool and I know*sad face*. I need a hug right now *opens arms*

Shallat to ma boos...

I will mention these few people. Not cos you all don't matter but because these people were stalking me all over to come back here.. even saw some of them in my dreams carrying laptop and shouting blog o blog o...hahaha just joking. These guys inspired me to come back. At a point, I had to ask if it was by force to blog but I just know you all did it out of love. Thank you all for being so patient with me.

Deola.. Thank you for threatening me on Sunday. Your cup will soon get full. Lizzy (I should call you sister) This lady called me almost everyday. Last time she called, I was laughing like a mad woman cos I knew why she called and I gave her the lamest excuse ever... and she was so full of support and words of encouragement. Thank you sis. Icelaw and Duru (Duru makes me question why I do not have a younger brother)...thanks guys.

Y'all that decided to stalk me on Instagram...Yaaaay we have over 900 followers on Instagram now o even though I am still the most boring person on there. I beat uncle Kelechi to that title (*turn to KC* Yea I just mentioned your name). Its annoying when I tell people that I blog and the next thing they say is "you better not mention me on your blog". God catch all of you lemme hear gist about you... It would end up here asap.

Wait a minute

See cobwebs everywhere. Oya everyone grab your brooms...let's sweep abeg.

No gist for anyone until this place is clean. Oya alele *mummy mode activated*

Mehn a lot has happened o. We haff not blogged since January. That's bad. What was I doing with my life? How did I survive? Kai kai kai. I am tired of giving empty promises. I won't but I will try not to go again.

I have loads of plans for us. Just give me time...we will get to it. Just be patient.

This is a very long welcome address but I shall be back with plenty drama.

I miss you guys and we hope to take over.

I love you all like KILO N SELE....

Cheers...

DON JAZZY AND OLAMIDE BROKE US UP

2016-01-05T14:13:00.000+00:00

What the f*&K did I just read?

Good day Mr.Chairman sir, panel of judges, accurate time keeper and my fellow audience.

Before I continue, I will like to give honor to whom honor is due..before some people will call me out and say I am trying too hard to blog like Stella. *hol up...hol up* I love Stella Dimokokorkus and I love her style of blogging but is it enough to get insulted over.. eyin eyan buru sha(humans are wicked sha).

Anyways, I was going through Stella's chronicle post and I saw this hilarious one. It is friggin' funny to me I swear and I am sure you all will say the same thing. Like TF...

Don't let me spol it for y'all...please read.

Dear Stella, I have been following ur blog since 2012. Call me a monitoring spirit cos I know everything happening over there but I have never commented. No, I commented once but it wasn't posted. Lol. So here goes my chronicle.

I'm 33, by the way. I've been dating this guy since 2008. We served together but started dating after service. He left the country in 2008 but we have been dating since then. I've had a couple of "serious relationships" but somehow they keep getting messed up and I keep going back to him. He has been awesome and treats me well. He loves and respects me and sometimes I get irritated because he doesn't have a mind of his own.

We do anything I want to do, and I'd prefer someone who would make major decisions sometimes. I have visited him a couple of times in the UK.

So day before yesterday we were skyping and inside the gist he asked me what I think about the Olamide/Donjazzy ish. And I said I think they were both wrong, Olamide shouldn't have thrown a tantrum and Don J should have just ignored. Boyfriend starts saying Donjazzy is a pretender, etc etc and as far as Olamide has apologized it's ok.

I told him not to judge as he doesn't know what goes on in the life of these people but My crime was to say that saying sorry does not wipe away your f-up as you might say sorry and the person says it's ok but it doesn't change what you have done or the pain you have caused. Gbam.

My guy starts shouting that I am mean and unforgiving. At first I thought it was a joke because we were having a healthy argument till‎ I realised he wasn't joking. Like joke he ended the relationship saying he's not sure he can be with someone who can make a comment like that (saying sorry doesn't right your wrongs) and went off the line. I'm still confused.

I can categorically state that I never disrespected him or raised my voice. A part of me is finding it funny cos if someone asks why we are not together am I supposed to say we broke up on top of Donjazzy and Olamide argument?

I called yesterday and all he said was that it wouldn't work. I can't apologize for having an opinion but I'm scared. Will I meet someone else? Or am I supposed to remove my heart from a 7 year relationship because of this? I know it sounds unbelievable because people have posted chronicles and I have rolled my eyes and asked myself "who dis one wan lie to", but it is true. Please post this, Stella, under chronicles or in house gists I don't even know. I shouldn't be finding it funny because we were supposed to do our traditional wedding in April.

The end.

GBAM....

If you didn't open your mouth like I did then you are an ogbanje. Hahaha. If I knew this babe, I would take her to church and ask her to give testimony. She just dodged a mighty bullet from a guy she's about to get married to. I have heard crazy breakup lines but this one is TOP NOTCH. O beat e hands down...Like seriously.

I need to go and vomit.

BRB.....

THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY

2016-01-05T13:38:00.000+00:00

I try small sha..

Hello my dearest Mobylizers

I wish I was anonymous and no one knew I was Moby... the kind of things you'd read on here would scare the crap out of you. Still scares me when I think about it sometimes sha...

I'm sure by now, we have jotted down a list of our resolutions.. I did. The first was "I WILL NOT DRINK COCA COLA IN 2016". I have had 3 bottles already *covers face*. So what's the assurance I would be able to keep to the others *sad face*.
Anyway, I know 2016 is going to be AMAZE-BALLS. I can feel it and I pray this year would favor us all in Jesus name...Amen.

I think 2015 was one of my nastiest years...*covers face* I did loads of nasty things that I can't put on the blog (nobody should call me and start asking questions o cos I will not say anything at all *lips sealed*). Just in case my pastor reads this, what I meant was 2015 was amazing. You know nasty doesn't mean I did bad things, right? Good.

So the good.

I had more followers in 2015 on all social media even though I had just 10 additional followers on twitter but its still a good thing. More people read my blog and my pagestat was tripled what it was in 2014...I usually don't check my stat but when I do, my brain just does this special moonwalk...hehe.

I got a job. It actually is my first time working for someone and it has not been the best experience so far but I'm learning. I woke up this morning with red eyes... Don't know if its conjunctivitis or cos I am angry and I am not smiling *angry face*.

I don't know where this falls but I let go of a lot of people. I made new friends and I stopped talking to some. So its good and bad.

This part is the best part of 2015...I got plenty pair of shoes. Some I got as a gift from people and some were from myself to myself. Now that's how I know 2015 was good indeed.

I became a worker in church...okay if that's not a big deal to anyone, it is to me. Now I get broke than normal cos the church requires my time and money.... crazy but God loves a cheerful giver, right?

To the bad part-

I got into my depression mood more than 2014...even affected blogging. Really need to watch it this year. I cannot come and go and come and kill myself. I think the depression sickness is getting rampant these days. Hmnnn it is well. I am letting go of negative thoughts...its not impossible to have negative thoughts, its how you handle it that counts.

I didn't keep to a lot of promises and I am so sorry about that. I would try better this year.

I had no life on social media (that's supposed to be good shey)...well I am taking social media serious now. People are making money through social media...I am going to. We no go carry last.

UGLY-

For some funny reason, I was looking for validation. I was constantly looking for someone to tell me I was good enough..that I am beautiful and that everything would be alright... From friends, family and the world. I mean, its not a bad thing shey? I have decided to do my best and leave the rest.

There are some moments I am not so proud of and can't talk about but taking the advice of my anonymous friend who doesn't want anyone to know her, NSG, I am letting go.

I am going to have me some fun in 2016. I think I grew up too fast and so I missed a lot in the process. So 2016, we are going to have us some fun.

Finally, I have decided to be a lil selfish this year. I have given enough of my time and energy to too many things and too many people and so I am going to be selfish and I am going to give myself a pat on the back when I'm done...Not to worry, y'all are safe *winks*.. That's like super cool.

Thanks to everyone for your wonderful comments, emails, shout outs.... even with all my nsansa (running) attitude, you all stood by me through it all. Thank you so much.

I wish I could list names but my oga at the top said if I do, I might forget to include some people's names and it might cause wahala.

Thank you for making this blog worth coming back to. Thanks for your prayers...they really go a long way. Y'all made my 2015 da bombest..hehe...
Let's make 2016 bombing (that didn't make sense shey?)

I wish you an amazing new year.

God bless you.

Cheers

HAPPY NEW YEAR MOBYLIZERS

2016-01-01T02:00:00.000+00:00

No be design am o... I saw this beautiful banner and edited it..Before someone would send me petition

Happy new year family...let's this do again...see you on the other side.

I would love to have everyone's number... please.. I have a few and I really want to speak with you all.

Thank you so much.

Cheers...

GIVEAWAY WIFE

2015-12-30T10:17:00.000+00:00

Hello mi lovies.

Thank you so much for having me back. It feels so good to be back.

This morning, I was going to put up pictures of the shoes (cos some people asked) but then I forgot my memory card at home. I am so sorry…but trust me, they are shoes I have worn before but are in pretty good shape.

I got a lot of INTERESTED mails yesterday *whew*. My plan initially was give out 2 pair of shoes but I got a lot of message... so I decided to give out the shoes on a first come first serve basis….and then GBAM, leboo read one of the mails and begged me to give of the sisters that sent in a mail. *turns to aunty* Aunty the jazz that you used worked o… congratulations…You know yasef. Hahaha

So I will send a mail to the winners after putting up this post. Congratulations...and I hope you like it.

In other news, I got some pretty interesting mails from you guys. The one that shocked me most was a guy that asked what give away I was going to do for them boys… this person also added that I’m beginning to be a feminist with my blog *side eye for you o*. And then GBAM...my head started booting. I can do giveaway for the guys na. What do guys need the most asides money? erhmmmm...a partner..hehe.

So I am doing a giveaway for my single guys in the house. Which other gift can be more perfect than the gift of a girlfriend in 2016. Hehehe.

I have 3 single girlfriends and I am going to profile them so you can choose by yourself based on my profiling. If interested, just send a mail with title INTERESTED IN A or INTERESTED IN B or C with a contact number. She would call you and if she likes you, congratulations. You get….

Ladies, make una no vex o... I love playing match maker. There was one time, I was the don of match making until reality set in that most of the relationship that didn’t work, came back to haunt me. Don't worry if this goes well, I will do GIVEAWAY HUSBAND too. I know Tunde Aare is single *covers face*

I will call each one SINGLE A, B and C. If you are the single, just thank me later for finding you love in a hopeless place and in a hopeless manner… hehe.

Here we go.

SINGLE A: Beautiful. 5ft 6 in. She is not fat..neither is she slim. Has a B.Sc. About to finish her MBA. Light skinned. Good mannered. Smiles a lot. Very brilliant. DOWNSIDE: She is very diplomatic. She doesn't take crap *evulllls*.

SINGLE B: Beautiful. 5 ft 4 in. Dark skinned. Has a B.Sc. Still serving. Loves cooking. Just got out of a bad relationship. Looking for a job. DOWNSIDE: Very very emotional. She likes money so if you no get money abeg don’t put interested.

SINGLE C: She’s a tomboy. Beautiful. 5 ft 8 in. She is a sport blogger (if you like go and be looking at all the sports blog…you will not find her). She is super nice and we are watching our weight together even though we know we are wasting our time). DOWNSIDE: She is a lil shy…not sure sha but I think she is.

NOTE: This is my personal opinion of these girls cos I know them. They only suggested I hook them up…but maybe not through the blog. I know a lot of you will say shey all of them are beautiful…which one wey ugly amongst them (which one is ugly amongst them)… Well, monkey no fine but hin mama like am. They are all fine. Ntoiii…

Oya o…I don try o. Guys here’s your own give away.

Why do I think Leboo would send a mail? Just saying o.

…….Off to reply mails.

Okay bye.

Cheers.....

DON'T PHUNCK WITH MY HEART MOBY

2015-12-29T11:20:00.002+00:00

Hellluurrrrr!!!!!!!

I know sey na only me waka come but I will still be wakaing..hehe.

I will purposely not say sorry because my sorry too dey plenty abeg. Every time I will be apologizing… but I can’t just help but say sorry. I have no excuse really…even if I try fabricating one, it would be so stupid…. Please forgive me. I am so sorry.

It is not my intention to keep leaving all the time. You all must think I like it....no I do not... I hate it… most especially when I get calls and text from y’all asking me what’s up... I just get depressed.

Let me confess...

I purposely do not pick up your calls and read your messages cos they remind me of something I'm not doing right *sad face*. There was a day a blog visitor saw me and she just shouted my name. Whenever anyone calls me Moby, I know its either a blog reader or a new friend. If you tell my mum you’re looking for Moby, she would send you to the next street ni… no one knows me as Moby asides my sister, Lola. So immediately this beautiful woman called me and said she reads my blog, I became depressed cos I am a terrible person. I met another at a wedding over the weekend and it was so touching for me. I come up here, put up post, make people like me and then I run off like Usain Bolt. Not cool shey? Kai. Shallat to my beautiful mobylizers...i lavvvvvvv you. Oya chop kiss from ma new boo

mpkewwwww

Guys its not easy to be a reality blogger... aswear. If it was a news blog, I will just be copying and pasting (no puns intended to all the news bloggers here) but being a reality blogger, you have to continually think and write and make people happy in the process. You want people to continually feel your emotions in your writing. Ko easy mehn. I've met a lot of mobylizer and what they always say that inspires me is “Moby you write like we know each other...like we are gisting with each other... totally relate able” and in my head, I will just be dancing skelewu...

Someone sent me this last week and I knew I had to put up a post today.

Hello Greg

The latest one I heard was “Aunty don’t put what I just said on your blog o” and I’m like “watchu take me for... a snitch?”

I will show you pepper... I will funk all of you up on my next blog post.. All of you that do not trust me again, I will show all of you... so Tobi and Kunle, come here now lemme open una yansh... Tobi said erhmmmmm that she...erhm... Hahaha.

This is what I'm going to do when next anyone is doing gbeborun beside me

No jokes..I will cover my ears and make noise *sad face*

You know you can totally trust me, right? Good.

That's why I totally respect all the reality bloggers in blog sphere.

But the truth is I get tired. Yes I get tired. I don't get paid to blog... and I am not complaining… I do this cos of my passion for this so there is no pressure but there are times I just don’t feel like doing anything... I just get distracted by work, my niece and my nephews, church work and man problems *covers face* but you get my drift, shey?

So here’s to us, I love you so much and I won’t leave for anything. This is late but Merry Christmas ma mobylizer and a fabulous happy new year in advance. I pray that the New Year will favor us. No weekend download today o… but I think I am getting tired of jollof rice. I have been eating jellof rice for the past 5 days… I am tired of rice. I had an amazing Christmas o. It was on fleek *in Durus voice*.

I had a goal before the end of 2015 to get 10 new shoes...

Well, I did

I gave one out (I had this urge to play santa on Christmas day and I did). Well, I want to play santa again. I have some shoes I want to give out. I wear a size 39 so if you're interested, please send me a mail with title INTERESTED so that I can treat the mail specially.

Oohhh...my email addy is moby.amusu@gmail.com

No words in any language can express how grateful I am for the love you all have shown me and still showing me. Thank you all so much for being there. I pray that it shall be well with you and your family. You will all be a blessing to your generation and the peace and favor of the Lord will not depart from you. Once again, happy new year in advance.

Kisses.

MY HIV STORY

2015-12-03T13:02:00.002+00:00

Yo...ma niggas...

What's happening? *hands holding crotch....two fingers in the air*..Hahaha. Can't a girl just decided to be crazy...mbok.

Tuesday was WORLD’S AIDS DAY and I was planning on putting up a post but nothing really inspired me...until today.

I am getting into that my mood again and this time, it seems worse and a lot of people are caring than usual… Just the love I’ve gotten is enough to last me a life time but I think I am an attention seeker *covers face*. I love attention kwa. Leboo brought me breakfast at work, my colleague has been asking what I want to eat for lunch... but my boss has a way of ruining your entire existence (story for another day). All my friends know the best way to break Moby’s heart is by not showing her atten… talkless of attention. I will just faint. But do not be deceived… If Moby moves on, you would wish you didn’t start.

Anyways, back to my story of getting in the mood, I got this message from a friend on my church’s whatsapp group and I thought to share. I put a lil bit of jara of my own.. put a lil Moby touch and it became blog worthy. Hehe.

I hope you learn a thing today.

Enjoy…

· He added you on Facebook

· You check his photos

· He is hot and he drives G-wagon 2015 model

· You add him as a friend

· He inboxes you

· You reply, all excited

· He wants to hook up

· You set a date

· You dress up

· No underwear *bad geh*

· Smelling good

· You put on a makeup

· He takes you for lunch at golden gate restaurant

· He Takes you for Drinks At Nandos.

· You two have a good time *he is bursting your brains*

· He rubs your hand and makes you laugh

· You fall in love.

· He is looking more handsome than normal

· It’s like you've known him forever

· He takes you to his apartment

· He makes you feel comfortable and lays you on his bed

· Kiss you passionately

· You love his aggression, strength, power and you give in

· It feels good

· You know it's wrong but it feels good

· You ask for protection but he says it's too late

He says he loves you and you don't hesitate to say you love him too... You open leg

· He penetrates and before you know it, it’s over

· He goes 2 d kitchen to get a glass of water and feeds you like a baby

· You feel special. “He must be the one”, you think to yourself.

· He helps you to get dressed

· He takes you to the taxi park

· He kisses you on the cheek and says “I had a great time”.

· He gives you 100,000 grand

· You smile and say “see you tomorrow babe”.

· He stays silent

· Your taxi drives away.

· In d taxi you can't stop smiling

· You get home and ping him that you got home safe

· He is online but doesn't reply. It's unlike him so you ping him again

· He doesn't respond.

· Minutes later you can't find him on your contact list

· HE DELETED YOU

· Days, weeks, months passes by. You start feeling sick, weak, you begin to lose weight with sores in your mouth

· You go 2 d clinic and got tested

· Minutes later, nurse walks in.

· She says “I’m sorry. You're HIV Positive and pregnant".

· WHAT!!! HOW!!! WHEN!!!

· You don't understand

· Reality hits u

· You walk home. Scared. Confused.

· Where do you start from?

· You call, he doesn’t pick up.

· It’s the end of you

· You look into the sky and mumble a prayer.

Hmnnnnn…

How many of us read this piece and thought “It’s no biggie...Its just HIV”…and how many of us can totally relate? Try going for an HIV test with your parent (most especially your mum) and then know if its a biggie.

I used HER as the victim instead of HIM but a lot of guys also take risks. I know a guy that can sleep with anything with a hole…and he doesn’t use protection. He says it’s harsh and he reacts to condoms *hian*.

Please I beg us, let’s live well. Did you know that as at 2014,19 million of the 35 million people living with HIV today do not know that they have the virus

(SOURCE: http://www.unaids.org/).

Also, the number of people living with HIV and AIDS in Nigeria as at 2014 estimates is 3.4 million *scary right*

Live well.

Be A Girl You Want Your Daughter To Be! And Be A Man You Want Your Son To Be.

To everyone, please live a life that always pleases God alone and not human being.

God bless us all.

Cheers...

WEEKEND DOWNLOAD: EMOTIONS EVERYWHERE

2015-12-01T09:22:00.002+00:00

Happy new month fam.

It's the first day of the 12th month of the year 2015. I remember when we were all shouting HAPPY NEW YEAR... Now its the last month of that year. God has been so wonderful. He alone is worthy to be praised.

And I pray for you, may your life glitter like gold and may the sky not be your limit but be your stepping stone, in Jesus name. I pray that people will celebrate you and your family. Your destiny helpers will locate you this month... and may your prayers be answered.

With my heart filled with joy and love, I wish to say HAPPY NEW MONTH.

*yaaaaaaaaaay*

To everyone who has visited this blog this year (hope you know you become a Mobylizer automatically), even if it was just once, I want to say a big, humongous thank you to you. You are the reason I am still here and blogging. God bless you.

*kisses*

So how was my weekend?

I will put up pictures instead... cos I have loads of work to complete today. My weekend was fantabulous... The pictures won't do justice to how much fun I had. My bride was crying like a baby all through. She is too emotional..ki lo de???? Hahahaha..

Enjoy...

Bride before...

Bride after

I don't have a clear picture of my bride... Thanks to phone camera. But I have a testimony and its happening very soon..very very soon.

Seeing the bride off to her husband's house

You knew I was going to do this...didn't you *bats lashes*

Selfie with them girls

If you went out on Saturday, I need to ask you a question. What did we do to the sun mbok? This has been the hottest Nigeria has ever been... WTF??? Truthfully I don't sweat as regular as everyone but the heat was gangsta... I was just pitying anyone that has a leather seat in their car and do not have AC and was also stuck in Lagos traffic. Bad combo... I'm sure that person would swim in the car. I just pray the weather changes soon cos truthfully, I have not had a good night sleep since Saturday... *sad face*

Anyways,I have a dream... A very big dream...and my colleague just insulted me over it sef.

I want to get 10 pair of shoes before the end of the year... and my colleague said "O ni nkan se" meaning I don't have work to do... hahaha.

HAPPY NEW MONTH FAM