Diary of a Ledger

KDR 1.15

2012-01-15T19:56:00.001Z

I'm supposed to be a bit shit at Call of Duty. The first Modern Warfare, despite my noble efforts and fourteen days (yes, in total days played) of my life, was a frustrating experience. World at War, the WWII set follow up, was mildly better, but only just. Then came Modern Warfare Two. I died a lot. Bazillions of times. You see the thing we live by is not winning matches, no, we give not an ounce of fuck about that, it's our 'kill death ratio'. Our KDR.

Suddenly, however, 2010's Black Ops was a different experience. For once my KDR crept into the positives. Not spectacularly by any means but never the less it was an improvement. It took me fucking months. I'd stay at around one hundred kills off, get close and then go on a spectacular streak of dying more often than plankton. Then I'd pull it close again and eventually, sometime in 2011, I got over the line and stayed there. I never got above a ratio of 1.11, but I can remember the punch the air moment of getting to 1.00, me and the cat leaping from the sofa etc.

I stayed away from Modern Warfare Three, not because I was still loving Black Ops but because I was consumed by dragons and that on Skyrim. It was a pretty decent excuse for not dipping my toe in the water but it was never going to last. Well it could have gone on forever, but the lag on PS3 and my silly 'it's nearly over, I don't want it to be over' brain malfunction bollocks meant that I asked for MW3 for Christmas and my lovely sister dutifully complied.

And so here we are, two or so weeks on from me first slipping the disc in the PS3 and I have a positive KDR. It's not just sitting still either, it's getting better and I have no idea why to be honest. Map wise it's the best of the Modern Warfare franchise, there's not one where I think, 'Oh shit balls, I'm gonna die horribly here.' Well unless I'm playing with @blindfumble and @maverick99sback, but that's a whole other story. The kill streak rewards feel a bit less ridiculous too. My KDR is 1.15 at the mo which by my standards is mentally brilliant. By most other people's it's pretty average, but fuck it, I'm polishing my virtual medals. SO THERE.

As a footnote to end on (and this will make no sense to anyone who's not played COD in the last few years) the FMG9 with akimbo will fuck you right off until you start using it and you become a killing machine. Well a virtual one. War is bad. Etc.

The Suarez Thing

2012-01-06T19:06:00.001Z

Most of you will know how big a Liverpool fan I am. One of the things I've always loved is the way the club conducts itself. The quiet dignity, the knowledgeable fans (the envy of other clubs), the way Liverpool has always felt like the 'right' top club to support. We accept bad decisions, don't see conspiracy when players get sent off and we take our knocks, get back up, heads held high. Until now. Now we can't accept the FA making, somewhat surprisingly, the right decision over the Suarez incident and we look awful because of it.

I see tweets everyday from supporters blinkered by their love of the club and I've seen 'fans' replying to the likes of Stan Collymore with the kind if racist bile that makes my blood boil.

The fact is what Suarez did was wrong. In any other form of employment he may well of had private support from his bosses, but he almost certainly would've been suspended pending an enquiry. Instead the club went on the defensive, attacked Evra and have damaged themselves and an institution that I love as a result.

That Kenny Dalglish, one of my heroes as a kid, has been the spokesman for most of that has been distressing. He looks out of his depth to be honest.

It's not too late to put things right and it's time to publicly admit they've got it wrong.

In a season where the Premiership has been more watchable than ever, my love of the game is on the wain. Spoilt by a young man who should learn to say sorry and then leave my club. You can be as great a footballer as you like Luis but I for one don't want you at Anfield anymore.

2011

2011-12-31T09:27:00.000Z

In a year of news, a year of unrelenting change, two stories, both personal, although one more public than another, intertwined. The King returned to Anfield and although it may seem trite in a year that saw so much change around the globe, seeing him lead the side out at Anfield felt like a step back to a time when things were simpler. When Liverpool's result defined a week rather than my actual life. It came at the right time, that jolt back to the past.

There are lots of positives to focus on, lots of things I could talk about that, on reflection, would make the year sound like a good one. 2011 is forever tainted by the second story but it's not in my gift to tell you why. In a lot of ways that awfulness has fuelled the positive: the giving up of the ciggies, the savings account, the photography and of course Tweetathon. Obviously there have been good times this year, Bestival and Festival were both brilliant weekends and Twitterpubnic was a great, great day. It just doesn't feel right to dwell on them.

I've met more and more of my friends from Twitter, lost a few along the way (because you really can't keep them all happy) and got better at just saying 'Fuck 'em,' when the unfollow button gets pressed, both by me and by others.

I think I'll look back on 2011 as the year I finally started growing up a bit. It'll always be a year with a cloud over it but the person most affected by that cloud inspired me to get off my arse and sort my life out. I was never more determined not to be a fuck up. I think I did ok at that.

So rather than bang on about it for too long here's my best 'things' of 2011 in pictorial form.

At and I took the new camera out

Mike found a new home

Cowes Week

Isle of Wight Festival

Bubbles

Lego Club

I met Tippers!

Twitterpubnic

Zoo

Bestival

Tweetathon starts

And ends with a house full three days later

Christmas with family

Goodbye 2011. In many many ways you shall not be in the least bit missed but you were a corner turned.

Happy Christmas

2011-12-25T12:14:00.002Z

Prometheus: Trailer

2011-12-24T09:14:00.000Z

Fucking hell!

The Hobbit: Trailer

2011-12-21T08:23:00.001Z

Only a year to wait....

The Dark Knight Rises: Trailer

2011-12-20T10:00:00.000Z

Bring it on...

Final Fantasy XIII-2: A Guided Tour

2011-12-13T10:00:00.000Z

Despite being derided Final Fantasy XIII was one of my gaming highlights of 2010. Yes, it was linear, but the battle system, once the game let you off the leash, was quality. The sequel, likely to get an early 2012 release in the west, looks interesting with what sounds like a lot being crammed in.

This new trailer shows some of the gameplay elements, which if you're a fan sound brilliant, but if not will have you running back to COD's aprons.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim - Review

2011-12-12T13:56:00.000Z

Skyrim is all about freedom. When the game begins your character is a blank canvas, a blank canvas that you paint all over for the next two hundred odd hours. Of course there's a story here, a good one at that, but Bethesda aren't telling just one tale with Skyrim, they are telling many. Some are more compelling than others but nearly all include some form of choice, sometimes impacting on how the story plays out but more often than not the choice is how to approach the tasks the story includes. As your character progresses, those choices become defined by your earlier decisions, your skill sets developing as you use them and thus becoming more powerful.

For those who enjoy getting lost in the heady numbers of a traditional JRPG Skyrim won't necessarily appeal immediately. The stats stuff is there but it's in a beautifully designed development system that hardly uses numbers at all. Your character grows steadily, the hard part is choosing which perk to unlock each time you level up.

Character progression is one thing, the world that character inhabits is another altogether. I've never played a game that feels this alive, looks this beautiful or that feels so cohesive. I tried to love Oblivion, but it wasn't like this. Skyrim is a world you want to see every bit of because you're never sure what lurks behind the next hill or over the next river. Its vastness never feels entirely over whelming although there are times when being attacked by a dragon and then being immediately set upon by a Wisp can feel a little unfair. But that's the wilds of Skyrim: beautiful but unpredictable.

Playing the PS3 version of Skyrim has not been without its problems. The lag/frame rate issue, which wasn't properly cleared up by the latest update, has been a niggle rather than a game breaker and the odd graphical glitch usually brings a wry smile rather than a fling of the pad. A game this big, this detailed, was always going to ship with some bugs not getting spotted but kudos to Bethesda for being upfront on their blog about what they're working on to improve the experience.

For the most part though the problems are forgiven because the game, overall, is a stunning achievement. Everyone playing it is having a different experience totally defined by their actions within the game. It is perfectly possible to ignore all the story stuff, after the opening sequence and go and become a blacksmith.

You make your own stand out moments in Skyrim: time a walk at night just right to catch the northern lights, climb one of the mountains on a clear day and just breathe in Skyrim, creep up on a sleeping dragon and sneak attack with your elven dagger. Whatever you do in this vast open world, wherever you go, it keeps giving.

Game of the Year? No question. Best game ever? Yes... (once those flaws are ironed out completely).
★★★★★

Blood in the Snow

2011-12-10T18:35:00.001Z

Top Ten: November 2011

2011-12-03T13:11:00.001Z

The Top Ten people I tweeted @ the most in November.

Skyrim - 80 Hours In

2011-11-26T20:35:00.001Z

I should be bored by now right? But I'm not. Not even close. The more of it I play, the more of Skyrim I see (even with the lag causing occasional irritation), the more of it I want to play and see.

I've been thinking this week, 'Is this the best game ever?'

I wondered that at the end of my Uncharted 3 review but that was a bad shout. Not because it wasn't an amazing game but because Skyrim has spun what I thought made great games on its head. Uncharted took away my ability to choose, Skyrim has given it back in spades.

'What weapon shall I carry? What magic shall I focus on using? Where the fuck shall I go next? What skill set shall I level up? What perk am I really going to benefit from? Shall I do some mining? Maybe I should chop some wood? Or cook a stew? Or make a dagger? Or kill that dragon? Or sell that diamond ring? Could I get married? Do some pickpocketing? Learn a new shout? A new spell? Or.... or... just go for a walk.'

On and on it goes and it feels like it'll never stop.

The amount of decisions should be overwhelming but the game never punishes you for going off and doing your own thing, it's quite possible to semi complete a quest just by wandering into a random dungeon and finding a random object. You'll only realise it was important when you speak to character later on. Or maybe you won't ever speak to them and you'll just keep that lute in your inventory forever...

Honestly, I've not been hooked by a game like this since Final Fantasy VII. And that was a long time ago, in a universe far far away. 80 hours into this and I feel like I've only started to scratch the surface of it, with FFVII I was off searching for the KOTR* by then riding a big golden bird.

Skyrim isn't perfect, no game is. But it's the best RPG I've ever played, which for me, makes it the best game I've ever played.

*KOTR: We're not really on the same page are we?

Why Skyrim is Eating My Life

2011-11-19T20:06:00.001Z

With some games the addiction comes slow. You barely notice that you're playing it at every opportunity after months of it slowly getting under your skin.

It wasn't like that with Skyrim, from the moment I killed my first dragon I was gone. I didn't start work until 10:45am today so I got up early and spent an hour doing quests for the Thieves Guild. Break into this house, change a ledger at this business, pickpocket this guy etc etc. Now that might all sound quite normal(ish). But re-read that last sentence. I GOT UP EARLY. TO PLAY A GAME.

I think what it is is this: I've always liked an RPG: I've fallen for Final Fantasy, swanned off with Zelda and run amok with Deus Ex, but Skyrim is the RPG I've always wanted. The one I've dreamt of.

To say there's a lot to do is the biggest understatement ever. It's insane. But crucially it's also fun and engaging and insane. But what I absolutely love is how random it is.

Example of Random

Earlier this week I went into a tavern in the far north of the map. There was a bloke in there so I went and chatted to him and he challenged me to a drinking game. So I said yes, because he said if I beat him I would get an awesome staff or something. I drank three drinks and blacked out. The next thing I woke up in a temple being told off by a priestess and when I went outside I was in the far west of the map in some city or other, somewhere I hadn't even been. After a bit of digging it turned out I may have stolen a goat and asked someone to marry me when drunk. Anyway, this morning I went back to the same city to do some of the previously mentioned breaking and entering and a fucking dragon turned up. And then, beautifully, the local guards took it out with arrows and that. I didn't even have to raise a finger. I just watched it land on roofs and stuff, firing flame from its gob as the local guards took it out. Then I absorbed its soul. Like a mother fucker.

It all just feels so... ALIVE.

End of Example of Random

Every time I turn off the PS3 I feel like I've paused a world. GTA4 felt a bit like that, FFVII felt quite a lot like that but this is on another level.

When I'm away from the PS3 my mind will wander back to Skyrim, to a view, a quest completed or a quest yet to be tried. Once in a while I'll pause and consider how this game got made and I can't get my head around it. I love a labour of love, where you can feel or see every bit of effort and heart and soul given, even if it makes the system running it creek. Skyrim is that and then some. The more I play, the more I love it. And I've been playing it a lot. And I can not stop. At all. It has me in its dragony clutches and it isn't letting go.

I'm ok with that. It's geek heaven.

12 Hours into Skyrim

2011-11-13T19:29:00.001Z

After the initial, 'Oh the graphics look shit compared to Uncharted,' and the, 'fuck me the map is sixteen real miles across!' shock wore off, I started to love Skyrim in a way I'd never loved Oblivion.

It is tough jumping from a game like Uncharted to this. Everything about the Drake titles are polished, the character animations, in particular, put nearly everything else to shame. They make the characters in Skyrim look like awkward robots. But you get over it and then forgive it. Why? Well because something had to be sacrificed to make something this big. This interesting. This enthralling. This non linear.

It's not going to be to everyone's tastes, the open world really is an open world. You can go where ever the hell you like right from the start (although it pays to play through a few of the games main plot objectives before branching off). Today I went for a couple of walks. One was story driven and one was a just for the hell of it side quest where I've ended up joining a college for magic. Like Harry Potter but with a bigger sword. Both trips lasted a good hour and a half each and suddenly I have a sense of scale to the game map. It's stupidly big. Honestly. If GTA4 was too much for you don't go near this. Oh and you can get inside every building, talk to every NPC and kill enormous dragons. And you sometimes kill them by jumping on their necks and sort of slitting their scaly throats. You don't get that on the bus.

For some though it's going to be overwhelming. I found that with the predecessor and gave up, but that feels less likely here. I want to see what happens with the Companions. I quite fancy being a lycan. I really want to go back and stick that pesky vampire with my sword so he can't resurrect his little mate who keeps stabbing me in the back. Oblivion felt like hard work. Skyrim is fun.

Character development works sensibly without a totally overwhelming stats system. 'This sword hurts more? Cool I'll have that one then.' Third and first person both work which is a big improvement on Oblivion, but best of all, the game world looks incredible.

It has its foibles, it's funny little glitches, but to be honest they add to the charm. Nothing so far has had me hurling the controller at the cat at any rate.

If you played Uncharted, graphically, Skyrim hurts for the first hour. Once you've been hooked by the story though you remember that graphical shine is cock all compared to game play.

Skyrim is a monster of a game. In a good way.

12 hours down. 188 to go.

Shit.

Official Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 - The Vet and The N00b

2011-11-07T10:57:00.001Z

Brilliant video re-imagining Call of Duty as if it was, y'know, real.

Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception - Review

2011-11-06T14:57:00.000Z

There's a moment in this games predecessor where you walk through a remote mountain village. It's a quiet, almost serene level that gives you a break from the mayhem. The closest you get to a pause in Uncharted 3 is a walk through a desert. Drake stumbling and desperate for water as sand slowly coats him and hope seems lost. Apart from that Uncharted 3 is the most relentless action movie you've never seen and is, for the most part, quite wonderful in scale and application.

Naughty Dog are one of the few game developers to make games for the PS3 that outstrip anything on the 360. Graphically it is, quite simply, breathtaking. From the environments to the motion captured character animations, it just shines. If Drake's running a little to close to a wall or a pillar he'll bump against it, stumble and steady himself. As smooth as silk. Sand and water have never looked or behaved this realistically in a game and although the sand has had all the pre-release hype it's the water effects that will have your jaw scraping the floor.

Story wise it's incredibly close to Uncharted 2, all be it with a slightly extended cast and an undercurrent of wondering throughout whether Drake's obsessions are going to cost him everything. Despite the apparent repetition, it's still enthralling and there are some nice touches, including some backstory to Drake and Sully's relationship. It's their friendship which dominates the story from start to finish as we are taken across the globe in search of a lost city in the sand.

If you've played the first two titles the gameplay is not going to come as a shock. Climb, shoot and brawl (hand to hand combat has been brilliantly over hauled here). Gunplay is solid and satisfying although the enemy AI still feels weak occasionally. What defines the Uncharted games is how the elements combine to make the set pieces such an incredible experience. And they are arguably the best thing this generation of consoles have offered us. Arguably they're the best thing any generation of consoles have offered us. Action sequence follows action sequence with you at the heart of it controlling Drake as he runs from fire, water and ridiculous amounts of spiders, usually with gun in hand taking out waves of enemies. You feel Drake's panic, the voice acting and camera all adding to the games cinematic qualities.

There are two moment in Uncharted 3 that will be hard for anyone, let alone Naughty Dog, to top. The wander through the dessert wouldn't be out of place in a huge summer blockbuster. The plane sequence directly before that takes gaming to another level.

Uncharted 3 isn't flawless, there are occasional control issues with too many actions given over to the face buttons, but frankly it feels like nitpicking to even bring it up. For the first time in a very long time we have a game with genuine replay value. Not because there's more to see or alternate paths to take but because every second of it is a joy.

Best game ever? Maybe. Game of the year? No question.

If you have a PS3, you need this game.
★★★★★
(Multiplayer review soon.)

The Top Ten October 2011

2011-11-02T09:00:00.000Z

The Top Ten people I tweeted in October.

Tweetathon3: The Stuff You Might Have Missed

2011-11-01T19:00:00.003Z

@FliesOpen came to visit.

Us Against The World by danbeames

Dan recorded this for us on the final night.

@timepoorgamer put his baby to good use.

The lovely RB and @emilynia got involved.

Blue Riband challenge http://www.justgiving.com/tweetathon3 (mp3)

@eatmyhalo attempted to eat a Blue Ribband in ten seconds.

@wo0 got whole packet of Monster Munch in her mouth.

My amazing support team @KyeLani and @twosoups took some time out to get some dancing in.

Tweetathon3 The Mother Ukers

2011-10-31T10:00:00.000Z

The last three songs from The Mother Ukers gig at mine during Tweetathon3.

Tweetathon 3: Another 64 Hours

2011-10-30T12:42:00.000Z

Picture from @sadiexport

Where do I start? The first Tweetathon in 2009 was special, the second was a personal mission but the 2011 edition was something else entirely. All that emotion of the first was back, that feeling of Twitter being so much more than the some of its parts and the result is £4500 for Chapter 1 a charity who are not used to that kind of cash injection.

For the first time I had a wing man/woman for the whole time I stayed up. @KyeLani gave up four days of working to join me for the whole thing. She didn't sleep a wink either. Sarah you are just an amazing friend, without you here at the heart of it all Tweetathon would not have been the same. Thank you so very much, love you loads mate.

On the second day we were joined by one of my first follows on Twitter. I can't quite believe that @twosoups was here really. Mate what can I say, you cooked, you cleaned, you kept us going that first morning before you even arrived and between you and Sarah you kept me thoroughly entertained. Thank you for being here, it meant so much, love you loads mate.

So many of you sent me stuff, recorded AudioBoos or took silly pictures and every single one of those random acts of kindness helped to keep me and the team going. Loads of you came to the house to be part of it and that meant the world to me. Friday night was just amazing fun with my house more full than it's ever been, thank you all so much.

The live gig on Thursday night was brilliant to be a part of, go check out the Mother Ukers website for more on the band but massive thanks to @mashupsoldier for organising, it felt like the Tweetathon came to life for everyone else that evening. I have the videos now and I'll get them posted up on here over the course of this week.

For those of you into the stats stuff, the @diaryofaledger account got over 10,000 interactions over the course of 64 hours and over the two accounts I tweeted 3,174 times. That's around 50 tweets an hour. I have no idea how you put up with that in your timelines but thank you so much, I honestly didn't see a single grumble.

Social Networking gets so much stick. As per usual it is so easy to blame the worlds ills on what you don't understand but Twitter has changed my life, changed me if I'm honest and broadened my world like nothing else ever has. Like real life, friends come and go, but at the heart of Twitter for me are a group of people that I genuinely love with all my heart. I think you know who you are without me listing all your names and without you there could be no Tweetathon.

Thank you all for giving your time, your money and your support. You have made me a very proud man.

Much love,

Gray xxx

Tweetathon3: 24 Hours to Go

2011-10-25T08:00:00.000+01:00

At 8am tomorrow morning I will start tweeting and won't stop for 64 hours. There will be no sleeping at all. Not even one of my legendary naps.

Why? To raise money for Chapter 1. You can find out more about them and donate here.

The aim is to raise £2000 although I'll consider raising that depending on how we get on.

I have two Twitter accounts because history tells us I'll get locked out for over tweeting. Chances are you know all about @diaryofaledger but my older and less well know account, will be dusted off for when the inevitable happens. You can find that account here @gray333. You can unfollow it straight after, my previous self really won't mind. If they both get locked out... well we'll cross that bridge if we get to it.

There will be one webcam running constantly throughout, it will be embedded on this site. I'm also going to have a second cam going for most of the key stuff, the start, the end, if anyone interesting pops round... I'll be embedding that one here as well.

There is loads planned, loads not so planned, it's me, you should know not to expect organised. I'll have @kyelani with me for the duration, making sure I eat and drink etc so the webcam won't just be me typing. Although there will be some of that... probably.

Thanks in advance for your support and donations.

Retweet the hell out of me for three days. The hash tag is #tweetathon.

Cheers,

Gray xx

Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception - Launch Trailer

2011-10-20T10:00:00.000+01:00

Fuck. That is all.

Video Shot on the iPhone 4S

2011-10-18T10:00:00.000+01:00

Not filmed by me. I'm not a cool surfer type. But shit, the quality is awesome.

And you thought you just wanted one for Siri.

A video shot on the iPhone 4S from Benjamin Dowie on Vimeo.

iOS5 - The Twitter Perspective

2011-10-15T19:01:00.001+01:00

It's been an odd week on Twitter before, during and since the release of iOS5 for iPhone and iPad. Those of us with one, the other, or both have been talking about it and the subsequent release of the new iPhone 4GS all week long. Much to the annoyance of some. In fact the negativity has been exceptionally high with some seeming to take real offence at people tweeting about the new operating system.

While I was working today, in and amongst all the technology, I pondered whether it was a bit sad to be so excited over a firmware upgrade or the prospect of a phone that talks back to me. On some level I guess it is. There are a million and one other things to worry about, but isn't that the point? The iPhone upgrade isn't something to worry about, it's something to enjoy. In a world where every news story is a bleak one and celebs turn into freakish bodybuilders over night, isn't it worth celebrating something, however simplistic it is on the surface, that makes folk smile?

Apple are the masters of preaching to the converted but I defy anyone to witness Siri working and not grin like a loon. It is truly amazing that the first time we have that kind of tech it's built into a mobile phone's operating system.

So is it jealousy? Is there a swathe of iPhone envy? A torrent of Android users convinced their phones do everything better? All of that I think, but what really makes a difference is the gang mentality. You have an Android and so does the guy opposite over the coffee cups during your tea break. But you don't have the same brand of phone. You have an HTC, he has a Sony. There's no natural bond there, no sense of identity. Sorry, I know it's ridiculous, but iPhone users have that. We're all updating our iPhones this week. Most of us are figuring out when and how we'll upgrade to the 4GS. We've all been looking at iCloud. We're all watching our iPhones synch to our computers wirelessly. We're all trying out iMessage. iPad users are playing with their new keyboards. There's commonality. Which leads to a bond. Which is gonna lead to tweets.

Q) What's wrong with sharing your excitement over finding the clever new dictionary embedded in iOS5?

A) Fuck all.

Tweetathon 3

2011-10-09T10:13:00.000+01:00

Yes it's that time of year again, in just over two weeks time I'll be embarking on another Tweetathon.

This year I'm raising money for Chapter 1 who have several buildings in Southampton (my home city) where they provide accommodation and support for young homeless people.

I'm aiming to raise £2000 to help pay for a new kitchen in one of the buildings, which, having been to visit, is desperately needed.

As with the first Tweetathon the charity is being supported for two years by my place of work and the original plan was that I'd be tweeting from the shop floor for the first two days. Unfortunately the Wifi is not looking like it's going to be sorted in time so I'm back to being at home for the duration. As with last year there will be a webcam throughout, so you'll be able to watch me turn into a puddle. You'll be able to find the feed right here on diaryofaledger.com or if you're on an iPhone you can download the Ustream App (for free) and search for Tweetathon3. Apps are also available for Android, iPad and Mac.

Because I can't be out and about tweeting 'live' I'll be running a pretty much open door policy at home. If you want to come over and visit at any point during the Tweetathon to help support let me know. People love seeing other people from Twitter on the webcam besides me, so if you can get to me, you are very welcome to pop round and make me a cup of tea.

It all starts at 8am Wednesday the 26th October and ends at midnight 64 hours later.

If you would like to donate you can do so on my JustGiving page. Thanks.

Apologies in advance for cluttering up your timelines again. ;)