Diary of a White Indian Housewife

Funny India Photo: How to Meet Women

Sharell शारेल — Tue, 07 May 2013 07:21:37 +0000

You have to admire this guy for his creativity!

Don’t want to spend money on matrimonial ads? Just write your name and number on a 500 rupee note and let it circulate. The person who received this note got it from an ATM machine.

Girls, a handsome and dashing boy is awaiting your call…. you’d better be quick before the Reserve Bank of India puts him in jail for defacing currency!

Photo credit: Shyam Sundar Mishra.

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A Stylish Sunday Roaming in Mumbai

Sharell शारेल — Tue, 07 May 2013 06:17:31 +0000

I caught up with a friend on Sunday afternoon, and we decided to go and check out some trendy places in the Versova and Andheri West suburbs of Mumbai. Versova, it seems, is the hot emerging destination for Mumbai’s creative types, especially in film and television.

First up on our list was Jamjar Diner, tucked inside a deceptively small looking bright blue cottage opposite the beach in Versova. A visit to Jamjar had been on my agenda for a while, ever since it opened last year. This new offering from the owners of Bonobo in Bandra is a totally different concept to the cocktail bar although it’s just as distinctive…and also serves cocktails! As its name suggests, Jamjar is a diner. It’s open all day, providing comfort food for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And it certainly has the atmosphere of an American diner, complete with juke box!

Inside is cozy (and perfect for a lazy Sunday), but due to a huge skylight, it gets a lot of natural light. What I didn’t expect from the outside is that it has two levels, and an outdoor terrace on the top. The terrace would be a fabulous place for private parties in cooler weather, but when I was there the humidity was so bad it fogged the lens of my camera.

Entrance to upstairs.

Upstairs seating.

Upstairs terrace.

My friend and I had lunch at Jamjar, and it didn’t take much to win me over. Fish and chips (my favourite food) was on the menu. Oh the joy! It came crispy on the outside and tender on the inside, and was gloriously free of masala. Such a rare treat in Mumbai. I was actually really impressed by the menu — it’s slightly cheaper than the Bonobo menu and I think the variety is better. The fish and chips cost around 350 rupees, and was totally worth it. The wine was reasonably priced too (another important critera) and there was even an Australian chardonnay on the list (of course, the budget-in-Australia-but-premium-in-India Jacobs Creek).

Quality fish and chips in Mumbai!

After a couple of hours of eating and drinking, we hauled ourselves out into the heat and to the next place on our list, a shop called Tribal Route. It was located nearby in the aptly named Aram Nagar II. This, we discovered, was another of Mumbai’s infamous contrasts. Just off a main road, there were leafy meandering laneways reminiscent of Goa.

Are you sure it's not Goa?

Laneway of Aram Nagar II.

We found Tribal Route housed in a rambling cottage in Aram Nagar II. It was a funky, groovy place — a literal treasure trove of unique items ranging from homewares to clothes. However, it turned out to be more kitsch than tribal. This, combined with the foreigner prices, left my friend feeling rather disappointed and we departed without buying anything.

Inside Tribal Route.

Very kitsch.

Yeah baby! Pimp My Ride.

As the sun set, we ended our adventure at the Sea Princes hotel on Juhu beach, where the Princess Beach Fair was being held. A predominantly fashion dominated event, as was to be expected there were fashion parades, stalls overflowing with designer clothes and accessories, and numerous overdressed Indian women who looked like they belonged at a formal party instead of a beach fair. We had a quick wander around, treated ourselves to a happy hour cocktail, and then headed for home!

Fashion show.

Some new material for the wank bank perhaps?

Fashion stalls.

A nursery stall, the odd one out amongst the fashion!

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I Finally Caught Myself a Baby Chipkali!

Sharell शारेल — Fri, 03 May 2013 15:17:29 +0000

Long term readers of this blog will know about my love affair with the Indian chipkali. I was totally fascinated by the feet on this one, which often chilled on the window near the air conditioner at our previous house.

Then, I discovered this tiny little one peeking out of the toothpaste holder. I soooo wanted him for a pet! Unfortunately, he was way too elusive for me.

When we moved into our current apartment on the 15th floor, we soon discovered that similar to Mumbai’s ubiquitous rats, chipkalis are also not deterred by heights. At least two chipkalis were living with us. One has grown so big (it scuttled out from behind a framed painting the other day and surprised me), they’re obviously thriving…. and breeding!

This evening, I went to the kitchen to get a snack and found this baby running around on the floor. He was so cute, I just had catch him and photograph him. Luckily for me, I managed to corner him and grab him. He played dead in my hand barely long enough for me to take the picture, then sensing an opportunity, leaped out and ran away.

(Now, before you wonder how I could bring myself to pick the “revolting” little critter up, remember I do things much crazier than this).

Ready to leap!

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A Terrible Example of What Happens When People Don’t Follow Rules in India

Sharell शारेल — Wed, 01 May 2013 07:58:29 +0000

Indians are known for their disregard for following rules and the law. The general attitude is do what you want and deal with the consequences later. I’m guilty of adopting this attitude to a certain extent.

When I was at Amber Fort in Jaipur with my mother recently, I horrified her by following an Indian and climbing up on one of the old cannons for a photo, even though it wasn’t allowed. “Sharell, don’t do that! You’ll get in trouble from those guards,” she warned. “Yes, I know, mum. But by the time they notice and tell me to get down, the photo will have been taken. I’ll just pretend to be ignorant about it.” Sure enough, that’s what happened.

(Here’s the photo, and I’m looking shamelessly pleased with myself).

If you can't beat em, join em!

However, breaking more serious rules can sometimes have very serious consequences. In Mumbai, it seems that 140 families are about to become homeless. They’re being evicted from their spacious apartments in Worli, which are going to be demolished by the BMC (Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation) on Thursday.

These days, I usually just ignore such matters because they’re a depressingly common occurrence. This one is such a shocking mess, and is the culmination of so many laws being flouted, I couldn’t help writing about it though.

Here’s a summary of what happened:

Way back in the 1980s, a builder developed a plot of land in Worli that was originally used by a drinks company to manufacture a brand of cola. The BMC gave the developer approval to construct nine buildings, with ground plus five floors in each.
In September 1984, the builder submitted revised plans to the BMC, to construct up to 24 floors and 16 floors in the buildings. The BMC rejected the proposal. However, the builder ignored the decision and kept on with construction.
In November 1984, the BMC issued stop work and demolition notices. Despite this, construction still continued. The BMC gave in to pressure from the builder and took no further action.
The illegal construction continued from 1984-1989. Court records show that the builder got away with paying paltry fines ranging from 600-2000 rupees for violating town planning laws.
Residents subsequently purchased the completed apartments and moved in, even though the BMC had not issued Occupation Certificates for the buildings. (OCs are granted to new buildings after the BMC has verified that they’ve been constructed according to approved plans. It’s illegal to occupy flats in a building without an OC, and the residents were informed of this).
Even though it’s illegal to occupy a building without an OC, according to this article, the BMC simply charges residents twice the water supply and sewerage disposal taxes if they do occupy it.
Residents state they were paying property, municipal, and water taxes to the BMC for the past 25 years that they occupied their apartments. They’ve also paid stamp duty on their apartments.
In 2005, residents made a plea to the High Court to get water connections to their apartments as these had not been granted by the BMC (residents have relied on tanker water the whole time).
The High Court asked the BMC why it had not provided water connections to the buildings. The BMC said the reason was because OCs had not been issued, due to Floor Space Index violations.
The High Court noted that the BMC had not taken any action over the construction of the illegal buildings. It summonsed the Additional Municipal Commissioner, who promised to take action. Later in 2005, the BMC issued demolition notices. It rejected the housing societies’ replies to the notices, leading to a second round of litigation.
In February 2013, the Supreme Court ordered the demolition of all floors above the five floors that were legal in all buildings.

Unless something drastic changes, the demolition will go ahead and residents will be homeless. The apartments would be worth crores of rupees, and the residents have plunged all of their earnings into them. Most of them can’t afford to go anywhere else (apart from far flung suburbs), and certainly not buy another apartment. They’ll lose all their money. The elderly, as well as children who are undergoing exams, will be disrupted.

It’s a terrible tale of corruption and people who have disregarded numerous laws.

What I struggle to comprehend though, is how residents have paid legal taxes and charges for 25 years on illegally occupied apartments!

And who should ultimately be responsible for this mess?

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What I’m Going to Be Living in this Summer: Patiala Pants

Sharell शारेल — Tue, 30 Apr 2013 14:31:14 +0000

Summer has well and truly hit Mumbai, and we’re sweating it out with daytime temperatures that have touched 36 degrees Celsius (96.8 Fahrenheit) and 80% humidity. It’s making me so tired and lazy (hence the lack of posts). I feel like sleeping all day!

I can’t bear to wear my usual jeans and a kurti/kurta combination in this heat, so I’ve decided to ditch the jeans in favour of… patiala pants. Particularly white patiala pants, because they go with EVERYTHING! They’re so loose, lightweight, and cool to wear.

Along with bhangra music, patiala pants are high up on my list of things that I love from the state of Punjab.

I got this pair at Ethnicity at R-City Mall in Ghatkopar, in Mumbai, for around 500 rupees. I think I might have to go back for another pair, in case I wear these ones out.

I still haven’t worn the top out though. It’s hard to believe that three years has passed since I wrote about having it made… and ah, I look rather embarrassingly the same! Same pose and all. Clearly, I need to get a bit more creative.

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