Digital Speed

Thinking the Lions Blog

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 14:10:00 +0000

I was strolling through the internet on day, and ran across the Thinking the Lions blog. (Is strolling possible in cyberspace? Perhaps this is indicative of a slow internet connection. Anyhoo, moving on.)

Thinking the lions is an interesting blog. The writer is an awesome god among mortals. I'm getting a divorce. Are you paying attention?

All right, I cannot vouch for the whole blog, as I haven't actually read the whole thing. But if you get a moment, at least check this article out.
http://www.thinkingthelions.com/2008/12/rebellious-youth-without-girlfriends.html

And if you do have a lot of time on your hands, read the whole blog.

Lesbian Zombie Blogging

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 14:06:00 +0000

First response after writing the title of the blog post, "Huh?" It sounds really silly.

Run by http://lesbianzombies.blogspot.com/ sometime. It's part random blogging, part original take on the zombie invasion. And I can never do with too little info on the zombie invasion. A bunch of girl crazy chicks go brain crazy. What's not to like?

Shady Library Looms

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 14:05:00 +0000

I really ought to dump another load into the Shady Library. Waiting until the end of the month is a bad habit.

Here's what I'll do. I'll load up December, and then first thing in January, BAM! You won't know what hit you.

Santa's Lap, a video feed

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 22:57:00 +0000

Well, here's a fun experience I had. got a wish

I was recently invited (very recently, meaning about five minutes ago) to look at a digital photo frame.

I've known about these frames for a while, I even know a few people that have them on their desks at work. The digital frame "that I just have to see from their website, right now, becuase it's frakin awesome, that's why" was from CEIVA.

The frame CEIVA offers isn't that different from any of the others I've seen. It has a memory to store digital photos, and will cyle through the list until it reaches the end, and then show the same photos some more. Not bad, if you're into accidentally showing of your "interesting" photos and getting fired on account of your boss not being that open minded.

However, their website experience is VERY unique. Going to their site gets you a video from "Santa's Workshop". An elf and Santa talk about the upcoming holidays, and give you an oportunity to upload a photo of your own to see what it would look like on the CEIVA Digital Photo Frame.

I was impressed with the technology behind the video. They incorporate your name, what you want for Christmas, and even show your photo several times in the video. I would buy the CEIVA Frame, if only because I was that impressed with their website.

Also, just a cherry on the top, running through the video can get you entered in a $500 drawing. Just think how many CEIVA Digital Frames that would get you.

Try it out yourself. Seriously, it was fun. http://www.sitonsantaslap.com/?utm_source=b

New Find on the Internet

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 21:13:00 +0000

Here's an interesting site. "Find.com"

Find.com Search Engine

Simple enough, I guess. Find.com is half Google ads and half search results. It's beauty lies in its URL simplicity.

Check this out, I searched for "Bad Boys" on a handful of search engines, and find.com was by far the most straight-forward.

Here's some URL samples that will change your perspective.
http://find.com/bad_boys
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=bad+boys&btnG=Google+Search&aq=f&oq=
http://www.ask.com/web?q=bad+boys&search=search&qsrc=0&o=0&l=dir

I'm not ready to say that this is a complete search revolution, merely based on URL size. There may also be some speed optimization on their very near schedule.

However, this is almost the Tinyurl of all search engines. Don't be surprised if this site gets big.

The beauty of TinyURL was the ability to give a very small number of digits to a friend, and have them be able to go to an impossible-to-memorize internet location. With find.com, you can easily type in your search directly from the address bar. Want to look up ducks? Just type in find.com/ducks. Using a search engine as user friendly as Google would introduce unecessary steps. That is, "Type URL" -> "Type search". Find.com is as simple as just, "Type URL".

That's okay by me. Anything I can use that will speed up my internet life, I'll take.

Find People
Find Jobs
Find Friend

Carly at Confoozled

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 20:51:00 +0000

http://www.confoozled.com

The author there is chill and prolific. She fully embraces her blissful insanity, like a Buddhist Ted Bundy, she is charming and disarming all in the same breath.

She's all over the place, and you either heard it here first (in which case you are fully excited to hear the new hype), or you've already been there, and you can confirm the news yourself.

Either way, just check her out. She's a caustic family-centered human being. What's not to like?

Yeah, http://www.confoozled.com you know you're going there next.

My very own hell

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 16:53:00 +0000

Rednecks
Circle I Limbo

Oakland Raider Fans
Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

PETA Members
Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

Republicans
Circle IV Rolling Weights

General asshats
Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

River Styx

Scientologists
Circle VI Buried for Eternity

River Phlegyas

George Bush
Circle VII Burning Sands

Saddam Hussein
Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

Creationists
Circle IX Frozen in Ice

Design your own hell

Writing your heart out

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 16:04:00 +0000

How do you write your heart out when you have no privacy. How do you expose your heart to the world when the world will eat it still beating?

I'll try not to be too emo and just say that I will simply have to suffer the fate of the Aztecs and offer up my heart to the world, in the hopes that they will treat it kindly.

Hitchens vs Wolpe

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 21:03:00 +0000

A new verbal combat has been provided on YouTube featuring the vocabulary superstar Christopher Hitchens! Seriously, even if I didn't agree with a single word he says, his use of the English language is both entertaining and intellectually stimulating.

Also, he's got an awesome accent.

Uploading to Shady Library: after

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 19:22:00 +0000

Wow, I'm pretty sure nobody appreciates the work that I just put into the Shady Library just now. I put up 66 entries, and there were 19 clicks of my mouse for each one. That's assuming that I didn't go all zombie and click somewhere I shouldn't have on accident.

That's, hold on... 1254 CLICKS!!!! Just for a lousy library that doesn't even earn any money at all.

I'm just kidding, I know it's all worth it.

Peace.

Uploading to Shady Library, before

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 15:53:00 +0000

I have a very big stash problem. I swear I'm worse than a pack rat. I have files everywhere.

I have DVD-Rs full of movies, books, music, pictures. DVD-Rs, people. I cannot possibly keep track of all this media. Ugh, moving up a crud to the Shady Library right now.

Uploading to Shady Library

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 16:17:00 +0000

I am pretty exhausted. I uploaded 58 new entries to the Shady Library today. These entires were mostly R.A.Salvatore and Alan Dean Foster, with a few random books thrown in here and there. I also put in a few encyclopedias I had lying around on my hard drive.

After a few dozen entries in the Shady Library, I just started getting cranky. And then, at the 50 entry mark, Blogger started making me enter a "Prove Me Human" validation code.

Ugh, I hope somebody out there appreciates what I go through for their free fiction.

High on PurpleSlinky.com

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 12:27:00 +0000

The Muse has struck.

Wow, I am really pleased with the turnout on my article for PurpleSlinky. I have more than thirty thousand views on an article I wrote about five weeks ago. http://www.purpleslinky.com/Offbeat/Seven-Things-I-Never-Knew-About-French-Kissing.192305

Yeah, I'm punched out. I'm super high on this one. We wow.

I also put up a mind map for the projects I'm working on. You can view it yourself at clsfdkidd.googlehacksx.com.

Sweet mother of Zeus, I love my life.

Legend of the Seeker

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 17:09:00 +0000

Holy crap, I now have a bladder and bowel control problem. For any of you that are still out of the loop, go check out http://www.legendoftheseeker.com

NOW!

New Goals for September

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 13:33:00 +0000

I need to restart my life. Most depressed people may either try to "restart" through an overdose and rebirth, or medicate themselves so that they no longer feel the urge. I think I'll do it completely sober, and attempt to be as non-suicidal as possible.

First, I need to identify to aspects of my life that I am not pleased with.

I waste a lot of time watching movies.
I waste a lot of time playing video games.
I don't write enough. I think my creative juices have gone stagnant, and that is a miserable feeling, my friend.
I don't create the web projects that I have lined up. I just let them sit there, all lined up and waiting to be worked on.
I don't have enough users signed up for the Google Hacks X Toolbar
I don't have LabRat completed. (An enormous project!)
I don't know how to play the piano.

Now, I need to set some goals that will eliminate these "problem places", and set me on the path that I really want to be.

Goals for September, 2008

Absolutely no video games. This may make me either go insane, or get my creative juices flowing again. Hopefully, I know what I'm doing.
Either write 1000 words, work on a web project, or work on LabRat.
Upload new entries to the Shady Library.
Do not watch any movies until BOTH 2 and 3 have been completed for the day.

That should take care of a lot of it, maybe sometime I'll squeeze in learning the piano.

A day in the life of Criss Angel

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 13:04:00 +0000

I was making my daily rounds of a bunch illegal downloading sites, when I came across this jewel. Apparently, Criss Angel has a TV show (duh), and does some crazy magic stuff every episode (double duh). That aside, try to read this episode synopsis like you were reading this out of a newspaper.

Criss attempts to catch a razor sharp arrow in his bare hands after it is shot from a nail gun at 1400 feet per second. Then, while on a tour of a warehouse, Criss cuts through a fans arm with a jigsaw blade. At a park, Criss’ crew is late for a football game and so he makes 2 players appear from thin air and then makes a football levitate during a perfect pass.
http://www.fastpasstv.com/criss-angel-mindfreak-4x04/

That is just insane. Pretend that this is not an optical illusions performer, but rather an ordinary citizen. So this freaked out dude gets shot at by an arrow, and catches it in his hand. "Yeah, I'm awesome." Then he's walkin' in some squatter's warehouse, and hacks off a buddy's hand with an electrical reciprocating saw. "Uh, oops. Sorry bro." Oh no! He's late for a football game with his homies, they're 3rd and 10 and down by 7! With a pikachu-like swish of his hand, he makes some extra teammates materialize and floats the football serenely to the wide-receiver with his yoda-jedi mind powers. "WTF! I'm h4xing the server! N00b$!! HAHAHHAAHA!"

Man, it all sounds like Criss is the ultimate shorthand-for-Richard. If you don't know the shorthand for Richard, I guess you aren't going to the H-E-double-hockey sticks.

French Kissing, CENSORED

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 14:20:00 +0000

I went in and hacked my article on french kissing. I took out all the really "good" bits, and now it is but a shadow of its former glory. I still think it's smashing great, but I am a little miffed that I couldn't say the S-word, even though it was absolutely necessary for the perfect story.

I now know why comedians like using foul language. It has a sort a shock value that can be expressed in a very few number of words. Hopefully, I will be able to express myself powerfully without needing to rely on those naughty words. Apparently, I won't get published, otherwise.

Here's the letter from Triond, accepting my revised work (YAY!), and check out the article at http://www.purpleslinky.com/Offbeat/Seven-Things-I-Never-Knew-About-French-Kissing.192305

Shady Library Videos

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 17:31:00 +0000

A few days ago I posted five tutorial videos to both Youtube and Revver. These are the first videos that cover the Shady Library, and how the passwords are stored on the Google Hacks X Toolbar. I guess that the Shady Library project is officially open!

Just today, The first day of August, I put up two books by Tom Clancy. The Hunt for Red October, and Patriot Games have been added to the Shady Library. Hip, hip, hooray!

Now, on to Arthur C. Clarke. I have a couple dozen of his books, and should put them up over the course of the weekend.

Happy Friday, everyone.

Pornographic, Vulgar, or Obscene

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 14:18:00 +0000

This is something new. I've never been accused of being vulgar before. I pride myself on my lack of name-calling, so when someone says that my work is too pornographic, vulgar, or obscene for their tastes, I certainly pay attention.

I tried to submit an article titled, "Seven Things I Never Knew About French Kissing", to the publishing website Triond. They sent back this charming letter...
Surely, I'm not that interesting!

Republican's outrageous spending

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 13:09:00 +0000

Moving ShadyLibrary to GoogleHacksX

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 13:30:00 +0000

Hey all,

I've discovered the virtue that is the custom domain on a blogger account.

I am unable to set the blogger CNAME on googlehacksx.com, since my hosting account actually owns my domain. I sent them a support ticket yesterday, requesting their help, and they've already got it up and registered. Praise be to Allah!

So, I'm going to go ahead and redirect the shadylibrary blogger account to shadylibrary.googlehacksx.com. I think it will go down for a while, like maybe a day or so. Lady Luck be with me!

I know in my heart, that if I trust in Jesus, and have enough faith in the internet, God will bless me. Amen.

Burger King is Awesome

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 13:27:00 +0000

I was on an errand again, and just had to stop for a bacon cheeseburger. Bacon cheeseburgers are God's proof that he loves us and wants us to be obese Americans. I neither want to argue with God nor my stomach, so I will go where advertisements will me.

Burger King is obviously the King of Burgers, and I once had an actually awesome burger there once. One good out of seven total means I have good (okay) odds of having another good experience.

So, I whip in to the King's place, walk in cause I hate drive-throughs, and I say quote, "I just want a bacon cheeseburger." The manager mics in, "Bacon cheeseburger."

Everything was going smooth as a Janet Jackson concert, until this chick says, "We don't serve lunch right now." I actually responded with a almost inaudible, "Oh, God." I think that was the first time I swore in public with an audience. I looked at all of their egg sandwiches, and finally decided to get a "wrap". This is actually a breakfast burrito, but they hate using names that real people use, so I had to get a "wrap".

I almost threw a fit, almost tried to reason with their stupidity, to ask them if they had ever had a burger for breakfast, and was it not the most spectacular breakfast they had ever had? But then I couldn't do all of this, and possibly ruin their minimum-wage day, because I suddenly realized that the chick was HOT. Not plastic hot, but real, human being hot. Like, OMG, my brain just turned off. This was like "McDonalds Girl", only in Burger King.

She had short, boring, dark brown hair. She did not have a ridiculous plastic body. She was actually bored. And she was really cool. I would have gladly cut off my right arm and worked in the burger place as an amputee, if it weren't for the social pressures and the sudden cardiac arrest I found myself in. Granted, she was working right next to three women who were exploring expansive waist lines.

I had walked in for a bacon cheeseburger, and stumbled out grasping a burrito, and very confused. Burger King is Awesome!

Dude, do you have a Slim Jim?

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 17:07:00 +0000

Today, I got locked out of my car. Oh wait, it wasn't a car, it was a van. And it wasn't mine.

You know those sort of "borrows" where you didn't actually ask for the lend? But if you return it before they miss it, it's okay? This was one of those situations. If I didn't get the heck out of dodge, I would roast. The sort of roast where I don't get to blog anymore, cause my hands are broken.

I had pulled into a Pilot Travel Center to get an energy drink, and I locked the van doors. I made absolute sure that I had the keys in my pocket, so I would do something stupid like, I don't know, get locked out.

I got the drink, walked back to the van, and the key didn't work. It was the right key, the one I had just used to drive to the Travel Center, but it didn't work on the doors. What kind of effing vehicle has two sets of keys? What kind of Gorram Pit had I found myself in? If God was paying attention right then, I'm sure he had brought popcorn.

My knees hit the asphalt, and then my palms. I started to hyperventilate, raised my face towards the sky, opened my arms wide, and screamed.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..."

[ 30 sec commercial break ]

"... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!" (okay, not that part)

I asked everybody there if they had a Slim Jim. 5 truckers, 6 car drivers, the guy that ran the Taco Bell, 2 Travel Center clerks, 1 on-duty security officer, and zero Slim Jims. They did not carry them in the store. I ran over to the Travel Center shop. They did not have a Slim Jim.

WTF! (Why That's Funny!)

I asked the dude that was still selling fireworks in the tent next to the parking lot. He did not have a Slim Jim. I ran back to the Travel Center, poked around in their showers and Laundromats for a hanger, and even went back into their maintenance section where I get arrested if they find me back there, but no hangers.

One of the Travel Center clerks went above and beyond the call of duty, actually went through all the shirts they sell, and found an un-used shirt hanger for me. Darwin bless her!

I had no idea how to use the hanger to unlock the van, short of breaking a window, and reaching in with the hanger to scratch my name on the wall of the van.

The firework selling dude came over to help me, didn't know how to help, but suggested to O-Reilly's I had completely missed a block away. Jeepers! Zeus bless him!

I ran over to the O-Reilly's, and they did not have a Slim Jim I could borrow, but they would exchange one for my first born child. I happily agreed, and ran back to the Travel Center with a brand new Slim Jim.

5 minutes later, with the aid of a Slim Jim, a hanger, and, again, the aid of the firework selling dude (Jupiter bless him!), I was on my way. I have a new respect for the friendliness and willingness-to-help of humanity, but am also disappointed that none of them have Slim Jims.

The Character of Jesus

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 17:46:00 +0000

First, before we can discover the character of Jesus, we must study his remarkable parentage.

Mary: Mary was a Hebrew girl, commonly regarded as a teenager during the Immaculate Conception. She was undoubtedly Human, although there are several other, contradictory clues. She is revered by many millions as a Symbol of Hope (possibly Draenei), she was smokin' hot (possibly Night Elf), and she was a virgin (possibly Gnome or Dwarf). However, I believe her humanity has never been questioned, and without further ado, we will say that she was Human.

God: God was amazingly the father of Jesus. Since Jesus' teachings show how all men should be loved, and God is the creator of all creatures, it is not impossible that He was Horde. Of the possible choices for the race of God, Horde Races (IMO) show the most promise.

Undead seems very fitting, since they will just not stay dead. By the time Undead are active players, they have been resurrected several times.
Trolls are extremely spiritual creatures, and it seems like they show the proper respect towards religion.
Tuaren are already worshipped by over a billion Hindus, and are an excellent candidate for the race of God.

On the other hand, Orcs don't have much going for them, aside from God's occasional use of Blood Fury. God has also proven time and time again that he is both homophobic, and definitely not gay, so the Blood Elves are out as well. In the end, although there is not much data to go on, it looks like God was Undead.

The traits of Jesus:
Jesus was a mage. Jesus' first miracle was creating drinks for his friends. He also summoned immense quantities of bread and fish to feed thousands. (Note: Since not even Mages can summon fish, it is assumed he had skilled up the Fishing profession.) Jesus also on one occasion teleported to an exceedingly high mountain, and then immediately, without any discernible cooldown, teleported to the roof of the Temple. These skills certainly display someone with Mage powers.

Jesus was a priest. He could heal the sick, could get rid of bleed effects, and also cleanse diseases. (Note: He had apparently specced into the Discipline tree, since he had on multiple occasions, reportedly, infused his friends with Divine Spirit.) He could also resurrect people from the dead. One time, his friend Lazarus couldn't find his body on a ghost run, so Jesus resurrected him after several very disappointing days. It is rumored that Lazarus was soon kicked out of the guild. Jesus could also walk on water. There is a hilarious anecdote about how He and his disciple Peter, (also a priest) went out together across the sea of Galilee, and Peter ran out of light feathers! What a newb!

Jesus was a warlock. He could control demons, and once unleashed an uncountable number of them at a herd of pigs. He also had a number of curses at his disposal. When a treant would not give him some figs, he put a DOT on the sucker that would simply not go away.

Jesus was a warrior. The way he could walk into a room and get immediate agro from all the Pharisees, surely suggest that he was a warrior. His piercing howl was formidable, at one point clearing the Temple of the moneychangers, although they unfortunately all brought adds. (Note: Jesus did not seem to take advantage of plate. He never wore anything tougher than cloth armor.)

It does not seem that Jesus possessed any traits of the Paladin, Shaman, Hunter, or Rogue classes. Granted, John the Baptist made a kick-butt Druid. (Note: There is an exception with the Palladin, knowing that on some, future, splendid day, He will place a judgement on each and every one of us. Another exception is the Shaman, since Jesus did a Self-Resurrect. This was after Judas, a rogue, hit him with an Premeditation-Ambush-Backstab combo.)

Conclusion: Jesus was an Alliance-Horde hybrid. He was a human-undead, mage-priest-warlock-warrior with a skilled up Fishing profession. He could heal, tank, DOT, and DPS without breaking a sweat. Holy Snot, my God is way better than your God. What can your God do?

God is Angry

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 18:22:00 +0000

This post is specifically for those who believe we (elect humans) become Gods after death.

Logic Rant:

We live forever in joy when we reach heaven, basking in the glory of God.
God is angry with the wicked, and offers endless blessings to the righteous.
In heaven, we become Gods ourselves, taking care of (among other things) the remaining children still on earth in mortality.

If all three points are correct, we must then assume that rules that apply to us, also apply to God. Also, vice verse. Not only does God live forever in joy, but it is also one of our traits that we are angry with the wicked, and offer blessings to the righteous. What is said about God applies to the righteous dead as well. This also means that God can be both in a state of joy, and in a state of unbridled fury towards the wicked.

Thus, one of the following must be true:

The universe has imploded due to this paradox.
Someone needs to rewrite the scriptures so they make sense.
God is happy being angry, and so can you!