For my whole life everything was assigned to me. It is both a blessing and curse. My first job as a factory worker was assigned to me. I finally escaped from it by taking exams to enter a famous university, which was located in a provincial capital. After graduation I was assigned to work back in my hometown. The first escape failed.

Then I took more exams to get into a graduate school in the biggest city in China, and I was tossed back to my hometown again after I got my masters degree. The second escape failed.

All my nightmares were about I was still working in the factory after I had read so many books and got all the degrees, and I was horrified. I was like a kite which could never freely fly and like a prisoner who could never escape from those high walls successfully. I was pulling my own hair trying to leave the earth but every try was denied by the gravity. Then I took more difficult exams and got accepted by University of Hawaii as a Ph.D student. I had lost the excitements for the first two times when I was accepted by famous institutions, because I was not sure about those escapes any more, but I knew I would keep trying and never give up, especially after I had my daughter. I did not want my daughter to have the same nightmares as I had. Preparing those exams were my only chances to transcend my surroundings, just like digging a tunnel leading to a brave new world.

When my journey started, I was fearless because I had nothing to lose except the last $200 dollars left in my pocket. As calm as a cucumber and as tough as a nail, I, armed with my intelligence, was traveling to the unknown and uncertainty, without a roadmap, because nobody would assign one for me this time. For better or worse, it was my own choice.

I had two huge luggages which included all the necessities for me to survive if I was dropped in a wild island, including a long rope and a sharp knife. I did landed on a beautiful island, but it was also a civilized modern city. One of the friends of my friend picked me up from the airport and sent me to the University of Hawaii. With these almost valueless personal properties, I came to the International Student Services to register. People there were surprised to see me and my luggage. Obviously it was not the common practice. The international student adviser asked me why I brought my luggage there; I told her that I did not know what to do and where to go. She asked me how much money I had and I told her I had $200, and she told me that was not enough for one month rent in Hawaii but she would help me.

To be continued…

Ingredients:

• 1 pound salmon cut into 4 equal pieces
• 1 head garlic peeled
• 2 green onion chopped
• 1 tbsp minced ginger
• 2 green chilis seeded and thinly sliced
• 1 red chili seeded and thinly sliced
• 3 tbsp vegetable oil
• 2 tbsp Chinkiang vinegar
• 1 tbsp soy sauce
• 2 tsp brown sugar
• 1 tbsp Shaohsing cook wine

Instructions:

• Place the pan over high heat put in vegetable oil.
• Place the salmon in the pan to fry once the oil gets hot.
• When one side is golden, turn the salmon over to fry the other side.
• Add garlic into the pan.
• When the garlic and both sides of the salmon become golden, add green onion and ginger, cooking wine, vinegar, soysauce and sugar.
• Add 1/4 cup water. Turn down the heat and cover the pan and cook for about 5 to 10 minutes depending on how much you want the fish to be cooked.
• Turn over the fish to let the other side simmer in the sauce for a minute.
• When the sauce becomes sticky. Add green and red chilis if desired.
• Turn off the heat and transfer the fish to a serving plate.

Yield: 4 servings.

Hello;

Your story of feeding your child brought a lump of poignancy to my throat.  Ah, how I remember this – - my “little gourmet” son salivating at the mention of the meals he loved, and my sweet-voiced and tiny sing-song comments by my daughter telling me,  upon being offered some food, “I don’t eat beans, mom.”   I laughed and set the bowl of  French cut green beans back down on the table.  As mom’s, our first concern was to feed our young.  Many of us grew up knowing hunger, and we vowed not to let this happen to our children – - or to anyone else we might encounter.  Thank you for your lovely story that brought me, and I’m sure other moms, back to those lovely and enchanting days.

JMS

Thank you so much JMS!

Hi Helen,

What a beautiful word to all mothers everywhere. I so agree with you. I have only 1 son who is married with 2 grandchildren and what you say is so true.

Thank you for your recipes too. It is very generous of you to send them. I do love Chinese food and would eat it everyday if I had a chance.

“Happy Mother’s Day” to you and hope you enjoy it.

Warm regards

Lee

Thank you Lee!

Dear Madam,

Thank you for such a beautiful and touching letter. I love the way you express the joys of motherhood. I agree completely that life isn’t, nor can be, completely fulfilled without motherhood. It brings such joys, and at times sadness. All we may do is teach our children how to make decisions, not which to make when they become adults. Your daughter was kind to write me back in a previous email. I was delighted by her eloquence and sincerity. I look forward to a future of more wonderful and sage Words from the Editor.

Sincerely,

Susie

Happy Mother’s Day to everyone out there!  If any new readers would like to sign up for our newsletter you can do so to the right of this blog.  You will receive recipes and essays in your mailbox before they are posted to this blog.

This Chinese vegetarian salad is low in calories and fat. Celery is believed to lower high-blood pressure. Bean Curd has a great amount of protein. This is a great dish for moms who want to eat as much as they want without feeling guilty.

Ingredients:

• 1 pound of celery
• An 8 ounce package of hard baked bean curd blocks (sliced into 1/4″x 1/4″x2″ strips)
• 1 fresh red chili sliced into very thin strips
• 1 ounce of shredded ginger
• 1 tbsp sesame oil
• 1 tbsp soysauce
• 1 tsp brown sugar

Steps:

• Wash Celery and separate the stems
• Place the celery in boiling water for two minutes
• Take celery out and rinse it under cold water
• Slice celery into 1/4 inch x 1/4 inch x 1.5 inch
• Combine all ingredients in a serving plate and toss slightly.

Yield: 6 servings.

Xin and Helen in Hawaii in 1993

I had always been searching for the meaning of my existence and asked why I came to the world. I found my answer when I became a mother. Since then, my life has turned to meaningful and colorful and the absurdities of the world has become cheerful and made senses.

I have never, never regretted having a child no matter what hardship I have come across. I feel that a woman’s life is not complete without a child.

Now when I look back at the process of my daughter’s growing up, it seems to me that I am looking at an impressionist picture; all the hardships are faded into the background and all the joy and happiness are the highlights which form the vivid images, fuzzy but beautiful. In the picture I have a faithful friend, my daughter, playing with me. In the picture, my happiness is to make my loved one happy. I patiently used blocks to make different objects only to win her a laugh by dismantling them in a second. I started to teach her to learn Chinese when she was only two. We searched for some little shining agate pebbles on sand hills and were overjoyed when we found one. We watched our hen hatch little chickens. We walked in the rain forests and tried to name the exotic tropic flowers and plants. We collected the colorful feathers of tropical birds from the zoo and put them in a notebook. We worked together on school projects—one calendar of different churches and one house with 5 gables.

The thing I did the most was to feed her with all kinds of food. I loved to watch her pretend to be a little tiger that would open its mouth wide and swallow the delicious food in a giant bite that stuffed her mouth. At that moment, I did not know who made whom happy. I think we were happy together and I loved the moment, although I regretted the little tiger’s table manner a little bit later, because in the real world where culture not nature rules, a girl should have “lady-like” manners. However, the little tiger’s appetite was always the greatest compliment to the food we cooked. I loved to hear her say “smell sooo good! (Zhen Xiang A)” with her eyes closed, intoxicated by the food.

Maybe the eternal parental love for a child is embedded in our DNA; I should not boast much for myself or claim that my love for my child is extraordinarily deep and sublime. All I can tell is that my love for that tiny life was so strong that it pushed me to transcend my surroundings and lead me from one new world to another. Several times I moved forward by burning the bridges behind me, all because I did not want my daughter to be stuck in a small city in China and live the same boring life all her life. Now the results are not so important anymore, and the most valuable thing is that we have fully lived our lives when we are together. Along with our adventures, I have watched her grow up from a little silly duckling into an intelligent swan who knows her directions and witnessed her transform from an ugly caterpillar into a beautiful butterfly who is full of confidence. She has her own wings to fly now. I could not ask for more.

We are an ordinary family originally from Yangzhou, China. Currently we live in the San Francisco Bay Area, which is a melting pot of different people, cultures and food. In our lifetime, we have experienced great famines and also enjoyed the most expensive dining experiences in the world at restaurants with three Michelin stars. After having tasted the food from all over the world, we still have an insatiable appetite for Chinese food. Chinese food has a long history and is unique in many different ways. It has its own rhythms, melodies, and aesthetics. For thousands of years, it has been evolving in its own ways and nourished generations of the largest population in the world. Our passion about Chinese food is coded in our blood cells and genes. We aim to keep the authenticity of the Chinese food we create, but we are also interested in creating new Chinese food and bringing Chinese cuisine to a new level.  The following is our manifesto.

Do it yourself

There is an old Chinese saying” Food is as important as the sky for ordinary people” (民以食为天 Ming Yi Shi Wei Tian). We, the ordinary people, make our food in a do it yourself way. All our materials, ingredients, cook tools and equipments are ordinary. We will cook gourmet meals without gourmet kitchens. We promote self-reliance and self- independent, which is not only a Chinese value, but a virtue valued around the world.

Be thrifty and save money

Chinese food materials and ingredients are inexpensive. You can feed a huge family on just a few dollars. If we all cooked Chinese food more often we can beef up our bank accounts.

Enjoy family and friends

We promote family values and friendships. Our food will act as the cement which binds family members and friends together, create a fountain to spread fun, enjoyment and happiness, and drive away pains, sorrows and loneliness.

Promote Healthy Food

Contrary to popular belief, real Chinese food is healthy. Ordinary Chinese food already provides a balanced diet. However, there is an unlimited field where particular foods are believed to be good to treat different diseases. Scientific or superstitious, there is an unexplored frontier for our adventures.

“One thousand mile journey starts from the first step”. Let’s start our Chinese DIY journey together, with the fun and with the joy, to create the greatest feast which will be enjoyed by our friends and loved ones.