Do they hurt?

Angels and Demons

2009-05-15T14:38:00.002+01:00

Very funny (well I thought so) comment from the NYT on the director of "Angels and Demons":

Mr. Howard’s direction combines the visual charm of mass-produced postcards with the mental stimulation of an easy Monday crossword puzzle.

To all those planning to go and see this film - did you see the Da Vinci Code? You did? And you mean to tell me you want MORE of that? The film's "star" Tom Hanks, who plays Robert Langdon, is also nicely dispatched:

... his face stroboscopically snapping from wry smirk to worried squint and back again, Langdon is something of a cipher in his own right, a walking embodiment of skeptical intellect who seems, most of the time, not to have a thought in his head.

Kim Gordon is very cool

2009-05-15T10:57:00.007+01:00

Just had to link to this photo of Sonic Youth's Kim Gordon.How's that for unassailably cool? I can't believe she is 56. Seen on Matablog, photo taken by David Emery.

Purgatory = Tottenham

2009-05-13T13:14:00.002+01:00

I loved this exchange from In Bruges, watched on DVD last night:

Ken:
[looking at a surreal Bosch painting] It's Judgment Day, you know?
Ray:
No. What's that then?
Ken:
Well, it's, you know, the final day on Earth, when mankind will be judged for the crimes they've committed and that.
Ray:
Oh. And see who gets into heaven and who gets into hell and all that.
Ken:
Yeah. And what's the other place?
Ray:
Purgatory.
Ken:
Purgatory... what's that?
Ray:
Purgatory's kind of like the in-betweeny one. You weren't really shit, but you weren't all that great either. Like Tottenham.
[pause]
Ray:
Do you believe in all that stuff, Ken?
Ken:
About Tottenham?

More quotes from the film here. Though on the basis of this season, you could make the same gag about Arsenal.

"Martin Amis does brilliant, world-famous novelist and all this as well." Pass the sick bag

2009-04-16T11:23:00.003+01:00

I was absolutely stunned when I read this over Easter. Don't think I've ever seen anything so sycophantic. OK, so I have very little time for Martin Amis. That's probably why it annoyed me so much. But still - Amis and Isabel Fonseca, "one of the most glamorous literary couples in the world"? Amis, "this writer of coruscating, polysyllabic, look-at-me prose, this writer who is one of the most famous writers alive"? (Wow, polysyllabic! How clever to be able to use words with more than one syllable!) Amis, "the sexy one, the hip one, the one who wrote the blistering satires on money and success, but did pretty well at garnering both"?

I could go on, but I fear I might be physically sick. Even Heat magazine would reject this kind of stuff for being too dumb. After the first ridiculous paragraphs, I thought ah, this is obviously some kind of super-ironic joke. She is doing a parody of a star-struck interviewer. But I fear not. She appears actually to be a star-struck interviewer. And a spectacularly brainless one at that. Oh go on then, here's a bit more: "... I'm not on his level. I haven't written a handful of the funniest, cleverest novels of the late 20th century". Ahh, poor little girl. Perhaps you should stay at home playing with puppies, rather than daring to share the same space as the most magnificent, wonderful, sexy, stylish writer around. If this is the kind of thing the Independent sees fit to print, then the sooner it goes out of business, the better. It will be no great loss.

"Tell the boys I loved them"

2009-04-16T10:59:00.003+01:00

Very sad article in the Graun recently by Jeremy Gavron, whose Mum killed herself when he was 4. This para is especially interesting:

Observation tells us that suicide runs in families, though whether the cause is nature or nurture is harder to know. For myself, I can say that my mother's suicide has given me knowledge - unwelcome knowledge, but knowledge nonetheless. One element of that knowledge is the possibility of suicide. Like drink to an alcoholic, it is always there in the background, always an option. But another part of that knowledge is an understanding of the actuality of suicide and its consequences for those left behind.

A nation of mindless slobs

2009-03-23T16:31:00.002Z

Culture secretary Andy Burnham saw an opportunity to score some cheap political points last week, using the success of England's female cricketers to upbraid the media for not taking more interest in women's sport. In doing so, he inadvertently let slip what he really thinks of the people in this country. His words:

"I think the British public can get interested in virtually any sport if it's sold to them in the right way."

Which really means:

"I think the British public are a load of mindless, indolent, curry-guzzling slobs, who spend most of their time slouched on their loathsome, spotty behinds and are capable of taking an interest in almost anything if the telly rams it down their throats aggressively enough."

Cheers, Andy.

The Full What?

2009-03-03T13:53:00.005Z

Will self reckons that "novels are the full monte". Eh? Shurely shome mishtake?

Morphmania

2009-03-03T12:13:00.001Z

A fun tribute to Tony Hart. There must be millions of Morph fans in the UK and elsewhere - can he not be made to live on in some way?

Two years

2009-03-02T13:09:00.004Z

Mum died two years ago today. Still much loved and much missed.

UPDATE: Christine has put an announcement in today's "In Memoriam" section in the Telegraph. Nice work.

The Homer Simpson defence

2009-03-02T11:10:00.002Z

Could be useful if I ever end up in court.

Some thoughts from David Lacey...

2009-02-28T18:53:00.001Z

From today's Graun:

Success in football usually involves imposing one style on another or at least having the better of similar styles. There are no absolutes. "Good football does not consist of playing 10-yard passes up and down the pitch and then having shots blocked off in the penalty area," declared Malcolm Allison in his definitive coaching work, Soccer For Thinkers, published more than 40 years ago.

Arsene Wenger take note.

How to make yourself VERY unpopular, especially during a recession

2009-02-28T10:52:00.003Z

Sarkozy's closest friend said that anyone who didn't own a Rolex watch by the age of 50 was "a failure".

Thanks for that, Jacques Seguela.

Recycling blues

2009-02-27T14:59:00.002Z

Mal Williams, chairman of the Campaign for Real Recycling, said some councils are producing low quality recycled material because of a method known as "co-mingled recycling" when households put out paper, plastics and other dry materials in one bag.

Oh dear. That's the system we have - very easy for us to use, but sounds like it's not so easy to sort the recycling afterwards. The Torygraph has the rest. Pah, recycling eh? What a load of rubbish.

Weight

2009-02-27T12:13:00.002Z

Alex is now 13 pounds exactly - so more than double his birthweight. Ouch, my aching back.

Michael Marmot

2009-02-27T11:46:00.002Z

Professor Michael Marmot says we have to do more to stop people getting obese. Inevitably he will be accused of a "nanny state approach" - this is his answer:

He cited two examples of communicable diseases, smallpox and water-borne diseases, which collective social action have largely eliminated. "We didn't say at the time, 'Oh, this is the nanny state providing clean water for people - people should decide for themselves whether they want to drink water with cholera in.' Nobody would say that today. Diet is a bit more complicated but we want the availability of a nutritious supply of food."

The rest is here.

Entrepreneurs

2009-01-30T11:16:00.001Z

Interesting comments from US journalist Mike Malone on recent Radio 4 programme "The Few" on the individualism of Silicon Valley entrepreneurs:

Entrepreneurs are very much focused on complete control of their own lives. You see that spreading out into our culture - look at the iPod, the iPhone, look at MP3 players, look at the personal computer. These are all basically products designed to empower individuals against structure, against large organisations. So it's liberating but it's also anarchistic.

Listen to the full programme here (for the next few days at least).

Nick

2008-12-08T13:22:00.003Z

peugeot crash1, originally uploaded by littererchewer.

Here's what my nephew Nick did to his Peugeot 306, 10 days after passing his driving test. Impressive, eh? He walked away completely unharmed, the lucky so-and-so.

Peter Shiu

2008-11-18T17:28:00.001Z

How funny - Steve told me about this yesterday. Peter Shiu used to live up the road from us in Lufbra. I knew all 3 of his kids and was in the same class as Amanda at primary school. Quite a few of us used to spend a lot of time at their house as they always had the latest cool stuff like Atari and Sodastream. Peter also kindly taught me how to do the Rubik's Cube. These brand names probably mean nothing to the kids of today but they were everything to us! Saw Amanda at Mum's funeral last year - must have been the first time I'd seen her in about 20 years. Mum was good friends with Christine Shiu, who died about 10 years ago. Both tremendous women. May they rest in peace.

More excellent cat action

2008-11-11T10:23:00.001Z

(Again via Andrew Sullivan)

Only one thing to say today

2008-11-08T15:45:00.000Z

Good old Arsenal,
we're proud to say that name.
And while we sing this song,
we'll win the game.

(Tune: Rule Britannia)

"Laugh all the way to the bank"

2008-11-06T15:11:00.001Z

Jay McInerney:

Four years ago, I found myself talking to one of Bush's southern state campaign chairmen, a wealthy businessman, on a fishing trip. "I don't give a shit about abortion or gay marriage," he said, "but for 10 per cent of the electorate those are the most important issues. So you give them the morality issues, bash the fags and the godless liberals and wetbacks, and laugh all the way to the bank."

Thank flip it didn't work this time.

NSS award*

2008-11-04T14:44:00.007Z

Marina Hyde comments on the Woss/Brand frenzy:

I truly suspect that some people complain just to feel part of it all.

However, the next bit is good:

Perhaps Ofcom should start issuing commemorative badges, so complainants will have souvenirs, and tell their grandchildren what they did in the Great Manuel wars.

This could soon be reality - after all, the Mail printed transcripts of the offending bits of the broadcast under the heading "Lest we forget". This is WAR, sweet lips. (Check out the hilariously ridiculous "what the BBC won't let you hear" subhead - does the Mail want the BBC to broadcast this stuff again so they can get all offended again?)

* No shit sherlock awards are given to those who distinguish themselves in the never-ending battle to state the bleedin' obvious.

"Subbuteo rocked."

2008-11-04T12:23:00.001Z

You can say that again. The book is called Teenage Flicks. Perfect. Here's David Baddiel:

"Me and my brother played it with religious intensity. We'd lay out the pitch in the room where the carpet was least rucked-up. That's where our parents kept their music centre. We'd use it for playing a 45 record called "The Subbuteo Sound". Sadly, I don't still have it. If I remember rightly, the artist was listed as "Subbuteo" and side one consisted of a crowd chanting "Suboo-tee-oh!". There was also general crowd noises. The crowd would make "oohs" and "aahs" at completely the wrong moments. We invested in a grandstand and some plastic picket fencing – the sort you'd see at a cricket ground. Funny because this was the period when Ken Bates was talking about installing electrified fencing round the pitch at Stamford Bridge. Subbuteo should've cashed in on that. They should've sold a battery hooked up to the fence which gives you a little electric shock. They should've sold miniature hooligans, too, which you flicked on to the pitch."

Shouting at the TV

2008-11-04T10:07:00.001Z

Good old Cherie Lunghi:

Have you always been political? "Yes, I grew up in a very political household. My mum used to shout at the television. At Mrs Thatcher. 'What a lot of fucking nonsense,' she used to shout."

Loof-broh Gramm-oh

2008-11-03T16:38:00.003Z

Loughborough Grammar School, originally uploaded by tomargh.

Matt Birks links to a nice photo of my old school. He was in the same year as me but excitingly now lives in Calgary. We had history lessons in that tower at the end of the path with Neddy and Stevie Smith. All good fun but it was a bit noisy when the bells were ringing.