I was out on a run last week (feeling much like described above) and came across the word “SPRING” just beginning to flower in a neatly organised letters of snowdrops. What else can I say? It’s not going to stay grey forever.
Have the best Monday possible, or at least make it so.

Still I was tidying up and ready to get to work, in actual fact totally missing the point. My brain was on automatic pilot. By the time the kids were gone, my lovely Australian child minder walked into the door with the words “this is just the best day ever!” She had never seen snow before and looked so excited; she told me she had been out in it already, making a tiny snowman with another girl she looks after. As she was telling me about her early snow start I again witnessed a living in the present example. Her eyes were lit up as she told me she had just facebooked the moment to her friends in Australia.

Wouldn’t it be a different prospect if we could welcome each new day with such energy? Carpe Diem, seize the day. I’m suffering some sleep deprivation these days and can’t see clearly until after a cup of coffee, but I know that I can certainly improve on starting the day without bagage of the previous night or day. You may not feel over the moon about diving into the Monday morning, but to what extend is that a habit? To what extend are we always preoccupied with the past or racing ahead to what needs to be done. It’s not a bad consideration for a January Monday morning to live in the present and almost certainly seize that day.

“All your past except its beauty is gone,

and nothing is left but a blessing”.

With time your body changes and therefore the way you look after your body ought to really change with it. I sometimes think back to the days where I trained many clients, trained myself and taught a number of exercise classes. I had the energy to spend for 10 people, was able to survive very happily on a few hours sleep if I needed to and I would put myself through many regimes of some sort. But that was before huge life changes such as having children and also many years ago.
If I truly listen to the wisdom of my body then exercise and healthy eating is no less important than before, but somehow my body seems to say “go easy with me”. Instead of going at it hard and making a workout or eating strategy a punishment, my body seems to say “let’s work together”.  It is no longer just about being able to fit into certain clothes, it is about investing into my health and taking great care. For that reason other aspects of keeping fit have become more important such as yoga, stretching in general and meditation. I take great care to not become a victim of stress and to turn my back to negative influences. Instead of lean meals, I take great pleasure in making wholesome, healthy and nourishing meals for my family. Listening to my body’s wisdom also implies having a conscious mind and having a good balance between the two.

If you were to take a couple of minutes and took time to listen to the wisdom of your body, what would you end up doing differently? What would you change immediately and what would you change over time? It is a cliché to say that you only have one body and most do not appreciate it fully until things go wrong, but sadly that does hold a lot of truth in it. Use the power of the mind to go inside and connect to the parts of your body mentally that may need some care, almost as a kind of “checking in” exercise. It is all too easy to be based in our worrying brains day in day out, yet you can tap into your body’s wisdom if you want to and do what is good for you.

If you look up resolutions in the dictionary then the first meaning is “finding a solution to a problem” and the second one “a decision to do something or behave in a certain manner”. After the festive season -with the benefit of a clean slate in the New Year-, I guess that time of year does lend itself well to making some resolute plans. I found that most people have strong doubts with regards to their own tenacity and determination, so the very reason for not making plans is because they do not trust themselves to see it through. So when people say to me “I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions”, they really mean “I don’t believe I will stick to it and see it through”.

We often count our failures and keep a long list of when we have let ourselves down. In addition we re-live those moments over and over when we account those stories to other people. After time it becomes a way of life. No doubt there are plenty of times when you haven’t let yourself down and success was the end result, yet often people let the negative weigh much heavier on the scales of experience.

So, New Year’s resolution or not? Should you –out of fear of disappointment- just slide into the year and see where it gets you? Treat 2013 as just another year, another bleak January and wait for spring to come? Research and experience teaches us that having an intention and a purpose ultimately allows you to achieve so much more. There is this innate quality in people that thrives when having a goal to aim for. And then there is the question of being able to measure progress, something that the 21^st century attitude is so keen on. By not having a target, you will never know whether you actually came anywhere near…

Of course my coaching head says to set some New Year’s resolutions, to go about your life with intend and re-set the goals along the way. Being behind the steering wheel is ultimately the place to be if you want to go places. Maybe you will surprise yourself this year, as you boldly step over the fear of letting yourself down. If your goal is important enough to you, then you won’t. But simultaneously you can’t control everything in life. Occasionally you need to stop the car and assess the scenery, the roads and signs along it. Somewhere in between lies the happy medium. You can live your life in any way you see fit, you can determine how 2013 will evolve for you, but at the same time read those all important omens that guide you along the way. The difference between those who live a successful life and those who do not, is only what they see and how they translate it to themselves. Successful people have an open mind to see opportunities and operate from a base-point that things will turn out well. Now there’s a philosophy worth living by.

Over the last few weeks I worked with groups of 60 kids at a time, predominantly year 9. There is something very inspiring about working with teenagers, although I understand some might not agree. I love the energy and the unpolished-ness of that age group, which is so evidently busy growing up yet still very much finding their identity. When I look at a group of youngster I can see the possibility and wonder how their lives will evolve over the coming years. Going through the session I found again this time what I have found on so many occasions working with teenagers. Quite aside from the fact that they seem to have spent little time pondering on self reflecting questions about who they are and what they like/dislike, excel at or struggle with, there is a definite swing towards anything negative. Many of the kids I taught found it far easier to point out what they were not good at. When I asked them to draw their hand on a piece of paper and write at each finger a quality/talent they believed they had, or something they liked about themselves, many hands stayed empty for ages. Partially because they said they simply didn’t know or out of fear of sounding arrogant.

This isn’t an especially difficult exercise because they are young people, because I have come across similar results with many adults. It may be extra troubling that young people lack such self confidence because in many ways kids hold the future. And what kind of future do you build for yourself if you think little of what you have to contribute? Thankfully a simple reconditioning of thinking can lead to spectacular results. It doesn’t require becoming big-headed and learning to write a long list of personal attributes. It simply takes a resetting of the mental filter. Instead of focussing on the negative, it’s recognising and celebrating strengths and abilities first. Absolutely everyone has something they are good at, skilled at, natural at. That isn’t something you choose, that is actually quite impersonal because it is chosen for you and set into your DNA and nurtured by the environment you grow up in. It’s worth celebrating those skills by putting them to good use in your world.
Secondly, it’s understanding the areas in life that may need improvement. Instead of saying “I’m rubbish at maths”, you may want your teenager to say “I’m great at art/drama/sport etc and I need to give my maths a little more attention”. These are simple changes but profound shifts in reality, because you start with self confidence and esteem which can overcome any problem. Additionally, I tell youngsters that it is impossible to be good at everything, because that is unrealistic and why would you want to? Lastly, and most importantly, I try and teach kids that the one person that can actively do something about their self esteem is you, yourself. If you learn nothing else than the fact that you can affect your own self esteem, then you have fought half the battle right there.

As aforementioned, all of this often applies to many adults I work with. We have in many ways the same issues and hang-ups as youngsters. Often those issues stem from the past and just get more complicated over time if left unaddressed. So maybe today, going into the weekend, call over to yourself all the things you are good at and all the things you like about yourself. If you are over 25 you should be able to write a list of at least 25 things! Do this on a regular basis and you will find that your perspective will shift; looking out for the positive, the strengths and the abilities will automatically put you in a position of strength to solve anything that comes your way.

If you think that you may be struggling with this then really try and cut out wheat of your diet to assess if you feel better. We tend to rely on bread and pastas in our busy lives for a quick lunch or dinner, but even people without a wheat intolerance say they feel so much better cutting down on or even cutting out those foods. My common rule of thumb for healthy eating is “eat what grows on the planet” instead of man made foods. Especially if you are trying to keep an eye on your diet, this is a good strategy. So try and eat more (brown) rice, new potatoes and perhaps substitute bread for rye bread and avoid eating these foods late in the evening. In the morning start the day with porridge or scrambled egg. Lastly, make sure you take care of your portion sizes. There is a delay in your tummy being “full” and that message being translated in the brain, so make sure you don’t overeat.

About fearful thoughts…..

About limiting beliefs….

is that they really, really work.

BOO

The Universe

Now that’s about as scary as things get in time and space!

(From: “More Notes from the Universe” by Mike Dooley)

If -like me- you have a newborn to attend to then the only solution may be to go to bed a little earlier or simply catch some sleep whenever you can. If you have trouble sleeping, try stretching (yoga) or meditation before going to bed and play some relaxing music. Have some definite “switching off time” before you consider going to bed and make the place where you sleep a “a sanctuary”, a nice place away from clutter, work and commitments. People tend to show off about how little sleep they got to demonstrate how busy they are, but ultimately you will always be more productive, motivated and effective when you have had more sleep rather than less.
Have a look at the 4 minute talk of Arianna Huffington on www.ted.com which puts it in great perspective.

I know people who swear by yoga, but for some reason it has never been my cup of tea. As your body and training requirements change with age, I have found that my muscles are more stiff and I certainly never take out much time to relax and focus. I thought I would try yoga and give it another go. Of course it would be great to go to classes over time but for now I am doing a 20 minute AM Yoga session or a 20 minute PM Yoga session (AM/PM Yoga DVD, by R. Yee & P. Walden) at home. It is supposed to be for beginners but -despite having exercised all my life- I find it nicely challenging. It certainly doesn’t feel like it is all “an easy way out” or an excuse to relax. Instead my body loves the stretches whilst my mind slows down enough to take stock and focus. It is excellent exercise for posture too and a welcome change from pounding impact from power walking and jogging. It has been a hugely valuable addition to my training activities and I feel the benefit for a variety of health goals. And with only 20 minute sessions, it’s easier to fit in.

If you are looking for an exercise session that ticks many boxes, give yoga a try. It will train your posture, especially core stability and flexibility, whilst slowing down your mind.

If you have a plan, an idea or you want to make something happen in your life, then make sure you “plough your field” in preparation for sowing the seeds of inspiration. Set yourself up for success for the future. The farmer ploughs his field always looking ahead, avoiding to go “off course” and creating diagonal lines in the soil. In the same way you must keep an eye on the bigger picture when preparing your plans and goals. Incredibly, where you sow your seeds of intention today, you may be reaping rewards of all kinds in the not too distant future.