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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/
en-usWebligo BlogHoster<font size="5">Trapped by Low Self-esteem..<br />
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<div align="left"><font size="1">Being trapped by anything can make one feel as if they are imprisoned in a small space with no air to breathe.<br />
</font><font size="1"> Unlike the Jeanie trapped in a bottle for centuries until someone happened to find this bottle and magically rub it to life. You are not that lucky!<br />
</font><font size="1"> Unfortunately there is no Prince Charming out there that will find you and magically rub you until you are free.<br />
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</font><font size="1"> You are the only one that can escape the prison of low self-esteem!<br />
</font><font size="1"> Your self-esteem is up to you and only you. <br />
</font><font size="1"> You can waste days upon days...years upon years waiting and hoping for that someone to come and make your self-esteem higher. It will never happen. You will have lived life lonely, angry, hidden and trapped.<br />
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</font><font size="1"> My advice to you is to begin with who you see every time you look in the mirror. That is the only magical wand that will work on YOU!<br />
</font><font size="1"> It is your responsibility to accept you! If you cannot accept you, how can you possibly expect anyone else to accept you.<br />
</font><font size="1"> So many people wander why they fail over and over again in relationships. Constantly looking for answers to what is wrong with them and why they keep picking losers.<br />
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</font><font size="1"> Well....as I have said....look in the mirror. <br />
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</font><font size="1"> If you do not learn to love yourself for the Gift that you are...you will not be able to see how anyone else can love you. You will constantly be thinking that your thoughts about you... are also their thoughts about you. This way of thinking is where trying to change the other partner begins. Another huge mistake in relationships.<br />
</font><font size="1"> Massive confusions take over and before you know it every little thing becomes an argument.<br />
</font><font size="1"> Your insecurities begin to grow because you know that he cannot love you... because you do not love you.<br />
</font><font size="1"> Then the relationship escalates into the emotional traps. These traps are all seeded from your inability to love who you are and accept your uniqueness as an individual.<br />
</font><font size="1"> You start to feel threatened by other women....take little or no care about how you look...you eat more....drink more...cry more....you feel jealous of other couples relationships....avoid romantic movies...avoid going to places where there are people you do not know....you will even stoop as low as spying on your partner...checking his/her mail...text messages ect.<br />
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</font><font size="1"> All of this can turn into a horrible world of destruction....all because you will not accept and be happy with who you are. Your partner is in total and absolute confusion as to what is going on. Some partners do try and help to no avail...then become distant or even leave out of pure frustration and a feeling of failure. <br />
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</font><font size="1"> A persons self-acceptance is the key to a high self-esteem, self-confidence, self-worth and internal happiness. <br />
</font><font size="1"> If I were to tell you that a necklace would bring you happiness if you wore it every day for the rest of your life...would you ever take it off? Would you not wear it and cherish it?<br />
</font><font size="1"> So then why is it so hard to just accept who you are right now and look toward bettering that person because it feels good. When you have a healthy self-esteem you better yourself because it feels good and it is a healthy goal. When you have a low self-esteem...you try to better yourself before you even love and accept yourself and that is where you fail. That is why you find yourself constantly feeling like it will never work.<br />
</font><font size="1"> You are always going to be trapped in that bottle floating endlessly through your life time if you do not just... like who you are right now and accept all of your differences as being a good thing.<br />
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<font size="1"> You are your own best friend.<br />
</font><font size="1"> You are who you should depend on and count on.<br />
</font><font size="1">It is you who can open that bottle and let yourself be free of low self-esteem!<br />
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<div align="center"><font size="1">~D~<br />
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<div align="center"><font size="1"><em>“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.”<br />
“To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.”<br />
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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/104205/
<font size="4"><font color="#800000"><em><font size="5">WHEN THE CHILD IS THE ABUSER.....</font></em><br />
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Motherhood can be the most joyous part of our lives. It gives us feelings of love, of being needed, of being responsible, and so many more positive things. It also gives us many challenges that we are never prepared to deal with. The challenge that I am going to share with you, is of a mother having to deal with an abusive child. Whether the abuse stems from chemical abuse or learned behavior, it is still abuse. These questions are my thoughts.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does being a mother to your children, switch into being a prisoner of their world?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does being a mother that nurtures and breast feeds her sweet helpless child, turn into a mother ducking from that grown child's blows?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does being a mother say we have to stand by and watch our children fall into the grips of addiction?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does being a mother tell us that we are to endure all and be responsible for this child till death do us part?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does being a mother mean that we must never turn our backs on our children?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does a mother deserve a lesser respect than a doormat?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When is there no name, short of shame and embarrassment for how a child treats his/her mother?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does a mother begin to fear her child and not recognize her own offspring?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does a mother have to be stronger than ever and choose her well being over someone she once held to her breast?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does a mother realize her baby is gone?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When does being a mother become a thankless job?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">When the Child is the Abuser, that's when!</font></p>
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<p align="left" mce_style="text-align:center;" style="text-align: center;"><font size="2" color="#800000"><strong>************************************</strong></font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Being a mother is THE hardest job in the world as far as I am concerned. When our spouses abuse us, we leave them, without further-ado. When the child is the abuser, we allow it. We allow and we allow, over and over again. We hope that they will change, grow up or just please leave. We will never ask them to leave, or force them to leave. If we do that, then we have put ourselves in an unforgivable position. Why? Because we are a mother. Mothers are not suppose to walk away from their children.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">At what age does a child become a responsible adult?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Are we to be responsible for their bad judgments in their lives?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">What are we teaching them by allowing them to abuse and control us?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">We teach them that this is an acceptable behavior. We are teaching them this so that we do not have to feel the guilt of turning our backs on them. Sounds a bit confusing, does it not?</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Well, we are the ones creating this confusion. Matters of the heart are their best weapon. They will use it until our hearts are no more. Only then can we, as mothers finally take a stand as a human, being abused. Life does not come written in a book for us to follow. We are entering every day, sight unseen. We can only go by what others have told us is the right way, or our gut instinct.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Another reason that being a mother is the ultimate, most painstaking job is because we believe that we have brought these little people into this world and we are responsible for their actions. What they do reflects on us. I will agree with both of those statements to a certain age. Once that child begins to make his/her own choices, it is then that they themselves begin to be responsible for themselves and their actions in life. We are no longer responsible. A child must leave the nest in order to learn how to survive. If you have ever watched a mother bird and her babies, you will see that the baby has only so long to learn to fly. After that the mother tosses this little bird out of the nest and forces it to fly. The mother is not being mean or hurtful. She is doing what any mother would do to teach her child. She is teaching that child the art of survival. I know that we are humans and we are not birds, but in Gods eyes we are given the gift of motherhood because we are strong enough to know when it is time. Time to separate being a mother to a helpless child, to being a mother to an adult.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Being a parent unfortunately does not set us aside from an abusive world. If our child grows up and falls into an addiction of drugs or alcohol, or has a very volatile personality, we are not above the law in their eyes. They can, and in many instances will, turn on us. At this point, it is our responsibility as a parent to do the right thing; the right thing that many others around you may not understand. Some will even frown on you for your decision. They obviously have not walked a mile in your shoes. For the others that commend you for your decision, they know what your world has become.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">If the time ever comes that you are forced to walk away from your child, you will experience what is known as guilt. This guilt will be a very natural reaction of a parent that has just suffered a great loss. You will feel shame and embarrassment as if you are the one that has failed. These will eventually pass and in place will come a feeling of a justified peace. Peace in the knowledge that you have just succeeded in making one of the most toughest decisions a parent will ever have to make. You have taken a stand as a responsible parent and have had to take control of your life and the freedom in which you deserve. You have also given your child a direction....you have made a choice. The choice to no longer enable the abuse. It is to disable it. You can do this, there are professionals that are trained to help you understand that you have made the right choice for both you and your child.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Please do not confuse disabling abuse and disabling your love. It is out of your love as a parent and your own well being that you do have the strength to make this choice. It is your love that will help you understand that this child needs to either get professional help or take the abuse elsewhere.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abusers only abuse because they can. In any relationship this fact stands true!</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is many things, but none of them are healthy or productive.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is unacceptable.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is wrong.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is mental as well as physical.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is hurtful and deliberate.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is not, ever a joke.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse knows no face or relationship.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse needs to be professionally dealt with.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse respects no-one.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse is irrational.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse must be stopped.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">Abuse will kill.</font></p>
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<p align="left"><font size="2" color="#800000">To save your child from further destroying both your lives, you must make the right decision. As a parent, you must take control and get help!</font></p>
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<p mce_style="text-align:center;" style="text-align: center;"><font size="2"><em><strong>Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws! </strong></em></font></p>
<p mce_style="text-align:center;" style="text-align: center;"><font size="2"><em><strong>-Barbara Kingsolver</strong></em></font></p>
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<p mce_style="text-align:center;" style="text-align: center;"><em><font color="#800000"><strong>~D~</strong></font></em></p>
http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/75590/
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<font size="1" color="#000080"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="font-size: large;"><font size="3">Walls of Communication!<br />
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<div align="left"><strong> <font size="1">Matters of the HEART are a true mystery to all involved!</font></strong><br />
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<p align="left" style="margin: 0px;"><font color="#660000">I<font size="2">n order to make a commitment to a relationship, it takes strength and trust in another. When we trust our partner and we receive trust back, it is a very nice feeling. One should never betray or play games with that trust. Those games usually get caught, and a broken trust will surely create a huge wall of communication breakdown. When you truly trust another, you are opening your heart and mind to an outsider. You are at this time very vulnerable for just about any kind of emotional attack. Confusion and misunderstandings are among those emotions now.<br />
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<p align="left" style="margin: 0px;"><font size="2" color="#660000"><font color="#660000">This is why communication is so important. It is the key to opening all those doors. Without it, the doors will remained locked and one will have to work very hard to break through. It is much more productive to just talk, listen, and understand your partner. I am not saying that this will be easy, but with love in your heart, it can be done. The end results will definitely be more lasting. For every forced door, there will be a negative memory to try to bypass in the future. When doors are open with love, patience and respect, they will have only good memories to savor and smile upon in the future. Those are extremely important in tearing down those walls.<br />
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Communication is a very important act between two people. It even has more importance than *** to keep a relationship building stronger. In order to to communicate, it takes two willing and open minds. If one mind is closed, all that will happen is the other will grow in confusion and frustration.<br />
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Some of us worry about the ABC`s in life and others worry about the EF&G`s in life. Thats OK. It is what adds to the color to our black and white life with each other. Yes it would be easier if we all worried and thought about things equally. It would be less confusing. But only for a short time. Soon enough our complacency with each other would get "OLD". It would be as if we could read each others minds, but what would be the point if we thought and worried the same. <br />
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A little bit of controversy is a much needed thing in a relationship. It helps us to get to know another part of our partner and also our own selves. When we open our hearts to another, only then will we offer this part of us. Until then it isn't necessary. </font><font color="#660000">One very important thing about a person sharing their inner most fears and disappointments is never, ever, try to stifle that person or walk away in frustration. If someone is that open with you, embrace it and hear them out. Never belittle their concerns as being immature or nonsensical because you would never have those concerns. Remember the ABC`s, we all think differently. Only then can you both communicate, otherwise you will add another block to the wall of communication breakdown.<br />
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When we are forced into silence, we begin to build walls. If we are not allowed to voice our inner feelings or disappointments, we will quickly stop trying to communicate forever. Once the first brick has then been set, the foundation of the wall to communication breakdown will rise up very fast. Trust me, there is not a single relationship that does not carry or tear down a brick to the wall of communication. <br />
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There are many levels of relationships. Some of us are put into situations that take much courage to see past our hurts and disappointments. Just remember what brought your relationship together in the beginning. Many times we will be forced to return to page one and start from there. With open minds and nonjudgmental hearts we can get past many mistakes and problems that will arise in a relationship.</font></font></p>
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<p align="left" style="margin: 0px;"><font size="2" color="#660000"><font color="#660000">Another favorite, but not so good habit that we as humans create, is to regurgitate things over and over again. I use the word "regurgitate", because that's how I view having things being tossed back in your face. Have you ever noticed that another lovely habit (NOT) that we as humans have is to only dig up the dirt when we are in the heat of anger? We do this time and time again, because we already know that these things are a guaranteed hit. It is a very cheap and bullish way to try to win a conversation. Is that not what most communication breakdowns are? Conversation wars that end up shooting old ammunition back and forth at one another? The problem there is that noone ever wins that battle. All that is really happening is that both parties have just taken an equal part in adding more blocks to the wall of communication breakdown. Both sides lose.<br />
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Communication can only really work when neither party is being selfish, meaning that if one person is feeling that they are being attacked with every word that is coming their way, and it is all about hurting them. They have automatically closed an open door without even realizing it. Low self-esteem will surely make a person feel this way. Or if one partner gets carried away and will not stop to let the other party absorb what was just said, this too is a typical selfish act. That is why it is important that we take turns with each other and try to understand what is actually being said. <br />
If one partner misunderstands, and you are aware of that, then you are responsible to stop and work with them in a loving manner to get them to open that door. It is vital to not assume anything until the other person has completely finished.</font></font></p>
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<p align="left" style="margin: 0px;"><font size="2" color="#660000"><font color="#660000">This is why the power of writing is so productive. One person writes his/her thoughts down, uninterrupted, without fear of being derailed from their thoughts and with the ability to just get it all of their chest, so to speak. People pay big bucks to be told just this, so listen up! If you find that your wall of communication breakdown is starting to build, then this habit of writing letters to each other is a very good way to bypass the wall.</font></font></p>
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Always reread your letter before handing it over. That too helps you to maybe erase a thought or two that was purely emotional when writing it. We all know that old saying, "I did`t mean that, I was just upset at the time". Well there's a hind site tip for all of us struggling with that d**n wall of communication breakdown.<br />
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<p align="left" style="margin: 0px;"><font size="2" color="#660000"><font color="#660000">Do you ever feel that you are so far under that wall, that you will never be able to communicate with your partner again and just want to run away? Before you run away, think about exactly what and why you are running from. Are you running from a partner that could very well be the best thing that ever happened to you? Or are you in fact running away from your own issues that you refuse to deal with? Remember this, if it is your own demons that you fear, you will run forever. You will never be happy. You will always blame your relationship or your partner for your downfalls. Running away is a cop out. It is a true weakness in character. To stay and fight and trust that your partner will understand your troubles is a true sign of courage and one that will be greatly respected.<br />
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We all have our pasts. We must understand that yes, they did happen and that is what they are, past issues. To have your past continue to come between yourself and your partner is a bad thing. Whether it is a person or just an experience, it should be left in the past. This is where good communication comes to the rescue yet again. When we are made aware of certain issues in our partners pasts, it sometimes makes them easier to understand and deal with if they happen to come about again. If we are left in the dark and we have to meet up with another's past and it is not a very good experience, we will be weak in defense and our ability to communicate positively will be almost non-existent.<br />
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Some people fear their partners pasts, viewing them as a threat to their own relationship. This is normal and should be dealt with through love and understanding. Again we must communicate with each other and not look down on anyone for their honesty and true fears.<br />
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That wall of communication breakdown will never completely come down if we skip a few blocks and ignore them, or handle them so wrong that they double in size. A good strong relationship will endure most any mistake made by humans as long as both partners are willing and honest with each other .<br />
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<p align="center" style="margin: 0px;"><font size="2"><strong><font color="#660000">~D~</font></strong></font></p>
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<p style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">"To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others."</span> </p>
</span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> </span></font></p>
<p><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">
<p style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;">- Anthony Robbins</p>
</span><span style="color: rgb(128, 0, 0);"> </span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">"Words are a wonderful form of communication, but they will never replace kisses and hugzzz"</span></font> </p>
<p><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> </span></font></p>
<p><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">
<p style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;">-Dorothy </p>
</span></font></p>
<p><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">
<p style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;">"Some think that love is all flowers and good times, but I think that love is more than just that. Love is the bad, as well as the better, not lived alone, but a journey together. Something that only the closest can share, with communication, respect,"</p>
</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> </span></font></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;"><font size="2"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">-Anonymous</span></font></p>
http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/52899/
TRUST....why is it so damn hard?<div align="center"><br />
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<img height="188" width="250" src="http://justblogme.com/uploads/d/Dorothy/4224.jpg" style="display: block;" alt="" /><br />
</div>
</div>
<font size="1">Trusting issues and jealousy basically go hand in hand.<br />
When you do not trust in your own self as to how unique and important you are....you immediately feel less than and with that, insecurities rise up and jealousy is born. A true symptom of a lack of trust in yourself!<br />
The only way to trust easily is to let yourself do so. It is easy once you understand why you are finding it so damn hard.<br />
<br />
We are creatures of habit....habits are repetitive thoughts or actions that we fall into immediately because they are the last stored file in our thought patterns which end up being in the forefront of our brain. What this means is that the last thought or reaction stored will be the first one used when your emotions begin to rise in either a negative or positive response.<br />
<br />
Habits are something that I talk about all of the time.<br />
'Habit' is a very small word which carries so much reality and control over our positive and negative reactions and thoughts. The word 'habit' is also difficult to accept as what causes people to stay stuck in jealousy or insecure emotional traps.<br />
It takes at least 14 days to break a habit, according to the latest researchers. <br />
Now when I say that, I mean 14 days of consistent behavior, repeated over and over on the same subject matter.<br />
That is why breaking an emotional habit is difficult. We do not run into fears and threats in a consistent manner.<br />
We basically have to discipline ourselves into a self-talk therapy every day whether we are actually challenged with one of our fears or not. In doing this we must be prepared for 14 days of feeling very much on an emotional roller-coaster. This is exactly why so many people go to therapists for support in breaking negative emotional habits. It is not a simple task.<br />
Silly analogy here but it seems to fit...think of a habit as pulling an end of a plastic electrical tie through its lock and then trying to pull it back. A very tough thing to accomplish, unless you work at it and stay committed to see it through to the end. It is not impossible but it is very challenging for most people.<br />
<br />
We are still searching for the answers to questions such as....<br />
Why is it so damn hard to trust?<br />
Why is it so hard to feel good about yourself and your relationship any time and anywhere?<br />
<br />
It is more so that, somewhere along the line you have fallen into a belief that you are not worthy of that relationship and you are in fear that at any second someone else will take over and replace you. Hence a low self-esteem or self-worth!<br />
<br />
Trust is not about what another person may or may not do to you or that they observe another.<br />
<br />
It is about:<br />
- how safe you feel, being who you are.<br />
- why you put yourself down.<br />
- why you instantly compare yourself to another.<br />
- why you feel the need immediately find a flaw in another that you feel threatened by.<br />
- why your insides tighten and twist so that you find it hard to breathe at times.<br />
- why you cannot accept a compliment at face value.<br />
-why you look in the mirror and hate who you see.<br />
<br />
Trust is all about YOU!<br />
<br />
In order to battle and overcome one's insecurities in life,:<br />
-you must feel secure in who you are and accept who you are.<br />
-you must stop wanting to change what you cannot.<br />
-you must learn to appreciate every little thing about who you are.<br />
-you must focus on loving who you are.<br />
-you must want to be happy about who you are.<br />
-you must realize that every second that you dwell on unhappy thoughts...is life being wasted.<br />
-you must learn that trust inside of you><br />
<br />
To be able to trust another and feel secure in a relationship...you must accept you, right now, this second.<br />
Accepting who you are and allowing that thought to determine your life will in turn give you peace of mind.<br />
You cannot control what another person is going to do, so why waste another second trying to through your own thoughts.<br />
Accept that you are you and your partner is your partner.<br />
<br />
Here are two very good thoughts to keep as your daily inspirations..<br />
<br />
<em>"To be Wronged is Nothing unless You continue to Remember It!"<br />
"We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are!"</em><br />
<br />
Remember...trust comes from within your own thoughts and self-acceptance.<br />
Strengthen those and your life will be what it is meant to be and that is free of chaos and doubt!!<br />
<br />
</font>
<div align="center"><font size="1"><img height="34" width="50" src="http://www.justblogme.com/uploads/d/Dorothy/3579.jpg" style="display: block;" alt="" /> <br />
<em> DorothyL@womensselfesteem.com</em><br />
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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/45412/
' Family' Where did it go?<font size="3"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><br />
</span></span></span></span></font>
<div align="center"><font size="3"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><img height="112" width="144" alt="" style="display: block;" src="http://www.justblogme.com/uploads/d/Dorothy/3278.jpg" /></span></span></span></span></font><font color="#800000"><br />
</font> <font size="3" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"></span></span></span></span></font></div>
<font size="3" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"> <font size="1">Today we live in a world of such different morals and priorities compared to yesterday.<br />
I know that that sounds like something all of our parents and grandparents have said to us, but in actual fact the changes that have occurred in the last 50 years have been the most drastic and self-destructing!<br />
<br />
Families of yesterday and today are so completely opposite that they tend to be foreign to each other.<br />
<br />
Does it ever make you wonder why? <br />
When I take a few minutes to just breathe, I cannot help but wonder how we, the people, have reached this point of existense. The point where the norm is now blended families, children with cell phones, *** in the middle schools, worse yet, a common conversation between people in a social environment or a workplace is now, nine time out of ten about their 'EX'.<br />
<br />
Is it economics or the strive for women's equality?<br />
Is it due to the fact that at the time of World War 2, women were placed in the work force because of the shortage of men?<br />
<br />
I feel that by placing women in the workforce, presented opportunities for women and men to become more sociable with each other, which in turn created the question of whether their choice in mates was fulfilling or satisfying them. The beginning of a relationship threat!<br />
Certain comparisons and doubts would begin when things at home were maybe not going as well as expected. Eventually that special person at home is not so special anymore. All of a sudden people at work seem so much more understanding and have more to offer. They seem to have it so much better! All of a sudden a commitment becomes just a bunch of letters and our self serving self gains control at all costs. <br />
<br />
Then we have the crossroad when women began to demand certain equal rights.<br />
It was not enough to just help out the economy and work in factories, now women wanted to have a choice of where they wanted to work. They began to demand choices of workplace. They demanded to be heard!<br />
<br />
With women in the work force becoming a norm, where does that put the children of the then 'Family'?<br />
It puts them in front of the television, being taught by a babysitter, raised in a daycare with other, 'wanted but have no time for' children. Last but not least the children become somewhat of a burden on the parents conscience. At that point the material world begins. The material substitutes begin to replace the love and affection that only time and presence can strengthen a child's confidence and self-esteem. Again the 'Family' changes! <br />
The children of the new 'Family', become more independent and indifferent of what we may have know as 'Family'.<br />
The husband and bread winner of the then 'Family' is now feeling less needed, less important and very much less than a man. This is where he begins to doubt himself and see his partner as a threat, not necessarily an equal. Another relationship threat!<br />
<br />
We move forward to technology. Which is being proven to be a faster means to an end. People feel the need to shine and impress others outside of their families these days. The priorities have swung totally to the other side of life's pendulum.<br />
<br />
The then 'Family' is no longer necessary nor does it fit the lifestyle of today. People care less about working on whats real and necessary to feed and strengthen a real 'Family', than they do about the biggest television screen, the newest car, pleasing everyone else but their 'Family'. The material world once again takes over the then 'Family'.<br />
<br />
Some will ask, "who cares why we are at this point in life and why worry about what is already in the past?<br />
It is not a matter of caring or worrying as it is a matter of understanding and just maybe redirecting some of our morals and ideas in our 'Family' unit.<br />
After all is it not fact that our children are our future?<br />
<br />
What exactly are you doing about setting precedent in your home besides talking or complaining about how awful things are becoming in our world?<br />
<br />
</font> </span></span></span></span></font><font size="1" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">We can learn from the 'Family' that holds tight and stays the course to keep their values positive and healthy.<br />
Just in my slight comparison of 'Family', then and now, you can see where things have become unbalanced, self-centered, and full of negativity.<br />
We can move forward with positive thoughts that will direct us to a more positive life if we CHOOSE to!<br />
<br />
</span></span></span></span></font><font size="1" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My thoughts do not apply to all people, but they do cover a large percentage of people in today's world.<br />
I am not against equal rights. <br />
I am however against equal rights for just women or just men. I am against unequal rights and extreme selfishness which is altogether different.<br />
When men and women can understand that we are all people, I do believe then and only then will we be able to get along equally!<br />
<br />
</span></span></span></span></font>
<div align="center"><font size="1" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Live & Let Live!</span></span></span></span></font><font size="1" color="#800000"><br />
</font><font size="1" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"> ~D~</span></span></span></span></font><font size="1" color="#800000"><br />
</font><font size="1" color="#800000"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">DorothyL@womensselfesteem.com</span></span></span></span></font><font size="1" color="#993300"><br />
</font><font size="1" color="#993300"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"></span></span></span></span></font><font size="1" color="#993300"><img height="34" width="50" alt="" style="display: block;" src="http://www.justblogme.com/uploads/d/Dorothy/3280.jpg" /></font> <br />
<font size="3"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"></span></span></span></span></font></div>
<font size="3"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"></span></span></span></span></font>
http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/32518/
Liar Liar....!<font size="2">Liar liar...pants on fire.... <br />
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<div align="center"><font size="2"> </font><font size="2"><img width="80" height="107" alt="" style="display: block;" src="http://www.justblogme.com/uploads/d/Dorothy/3277.jpg" /></font><font size="2"> </font><br />
</div>
<font size="2"> <br />
As children we had already little rhymes that taught us that lies were not a good thing.<br />
<br />
Lying, as any learned behavior is a very bad habit as are any negative habits... there are many reasons that people lie. <br />
To lie with deliberation is definitely a control of one being self served.<br />
Lying with out deliberation is where the habit has become a part of that persons way of life, being undeliberate now, which I beleive is even worse, because a person that is a habitual liar cannot not even differentiate reality from non reality. This person is dangerous and can be very confusing to live with.<br />
Drug/alcohol addicts will fall into this lying area more than the controlled one because of the merry-go-round they are on. Lying becomes a way of survival and they will do it with pure passion and need to feed thier hunger.<br />
<br />
IS lying a necessary part of life? <br />
Hmmmm... Lets think about where we began:<br />
When we are babies, do we lie?<br />
Do we learn to play the game of control then?<br />
Do babies cry because they know that they will be served through that action, or are they taught that crying will be self-serving?<br />
Children will lie when they are taught that they can get away with something through that type of manipulation, or when they are lied too.<br />
I remember when I was taught to lie...I went to the store for my mother and had change, with that change I bought a candy...when I went home, my mother asked me why I was ten cents short, and she continued..saying that if I tell her the truth I will not be scolded, so I told her the truth and she punished me severely. <br />
Now unfortunately that was when my trust went down the tubes and from that point on, I lied in certain cases to protect myself. <br />
A couple of not so good behaviours were taught to me from that one incident...I learnt to lie when I had to and I also learnt that my mother could not be trusted with her words.<br />
From that day on, I learnt to play the game. <br />
White lies as opposed to black lies: does that mean that white lies are good and black lies are bad?<br />
Is that saying that lying has a positive means?<br />
It can be very confusing, as most humans are.<br />
A lie is a lie I have always tried to teach my children. When you lie to protect yourself it is still in a sense, self-serving which we are taught is wrong?<br />
To lie to deceive another is definitely clearly wrong.<br />
I would say that there are definitely gray areas when it comes to telling lies. But that it is not a necessary to life.<br />
<br />
It depends on the person and their conscience. I know some people that could not tell a lie if their lives depended on it and I know people that will lie and will follow that lie with justification that they will bet their lives on.<br />
<br />
I beleive it is a true learned behaviour as are so many of our negative emotions.<br />
Also if we lived in a perfect world, would we ever have to feel like we have to lie?<br />
Our world is full of negativity and elements of trickery and sometimes in order to battle these wars we need to use weapons that are not so positive to fight them.<br />
<br />
We will never be able to control nor understand others in their methods to their madness. Live and let live is my way of thinking. We are only responsible for what we can control, that being our own minds and intentions!<br />
<br />
Life can be confusing enough in our own little corners without trying to solve the worlds confusions.<br />
Pandora Boxes are definitely a good brain twister and does wake up a lot of sleeping giants in Jacks beanstalk <img border="0" src="http://s3.images.proboards.com/wink.gif" alt=";)" /><br />
<br />
In any case practising and sharing positive habits and honesty will invite positive habits and honesty in return.<br />
<br />
As Lyfe Jennings sings,"When you are trying to do positive things, positive results have got to follow"<br />
<br />
Thats all I have to say about that!!!<br />
<br />
Huggggzzzzz~D~!</font>
http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/32324/
Bullying !! Where does it begin? Where does it end?<div align="center"> <span class="headline" id="rssheadline"><img alt="" style="display: block;" src="http://www.womensselfesteem.builderspot.com/t//th_bully2.jpg" /><font color="#0000ff"></font></span></div>
<font color="#0000ff"> </font>
<div align="left"><font size="1" color="#0000ff"><span id="rssbody">We were born into a safe world...only knowing the sound of our mother and father maybe even a sibling.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">We feared nothing, we hated no one, we trust everything and everyone that we recognized.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody">We cried only when our bodies told us that we are in hunger or in pain.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody">We did not know the pain and loneliness of words...YET!</span><br />
<span id="rssbody">We grew in trust and belief in our early years because we had nothing else to compare our lives with YET!</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Why does this safe world and total feeling of healthy self-worth and self-esteem stop?</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">The we enter our first year in the education system...all of a sudden things become contrary to what we knew up to then. We hear how different life can be in different households. We see how different others dress, eat and act towards others. We begin to grow away from our nest.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">We move forward and continue into another year, then another, all along gathering memories of life as we experience it in the world of growth. Some memories are good and some are not so good. Some of us are strong enough to stand up to the negativity we experience and move along smoothly. Others are not so strong and fall into a whirlwind of abuse cycles called bully-ism and the abuse that goes along with that.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">We fear not being accepted and then we fear that if we do not allow the abuse from the bullies that we will never get any attention ever from them. So in turn we allow the abuse. We become our own abusers of sorts. WE become driven to gain an acknowledgment or acceptance of any kind just to feel that we are alive in their eyes.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">What do these bully's have over us, that we will allow, even welcome the abuse? Abuse that takes form in so many ways, whether it be physical, name calling, hazing, ridiculing and/or ***ual harassment.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Where do these bullies come from?</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Where do they learn to hurt and hate just in the name of fun?</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">What about the kids that just follow along because of their fear of not being accepted? Are they bullies too?</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">There are many sides to this horrible world of bullies and victims. The bully had to learn or not learn civilized treatment of others somewhere. As I mentioned in the beginning of this article, we were born without hate and fear.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Where did the victim loose their sense of self-respect?</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">OR</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Their strength to stand up and say STOP or NO?</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">These are questions that we must find the answers to if we are ever going to begin to learn how to overcome the issue of bullying.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Our children are becoming bullies and victims because of how they feel about themselves inside and/or what they are perceiving is simply fun and games.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">I have attached a story that comes from my community. This is way to close to home even for me.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Please read this and instead of reading the names of the children that you see...replace the names with your children's names.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Do not be fooled...this is a reality that your children and mine are living every day even if they do not make you aware of it.<br />
<br />
</span> <span id="rssbody"></span></font></div>
<font size="1" color="#0000ff" />
<div align="center"><font size="1" color="#0000ff"><span id="rssbody"></span>**********************************</font><br />
<font size="1" color="#0000ff"> </font></div>
<div align="left"><font size="1" color="#0000ff"><span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Police: 3 DeLand school teens plotted murder</span><br />
<span id="rssbody">By ROSA RAMIREZ</span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Staff Writer DELAND -- Three DeLand Middle School students, including one who claimed to admire the shooters of the Columbine High School massacre, face felony charges for reportedly plotting to shoot classmates and then themselves, authorities said Friday.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">The Volusia County Sheriff's Office took all three students -- two boys and a girl -- into custody and is charging them with conspiracy to commit murder. The three seventh-graders have been transported to the Volusia Regional Juvenile Detention Center in Daytona Beach, sheriff's spokesman Gary Davidson said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">The teens were identified by authorities as Austin Mohr, Tyler Christian and Charlene Russell, all 13. Davidson said the State Attorney's Office will determine if the teens will be charged as juveniles or adults.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Davidson said the plot was uncovered March 5 after a student who was not involved received a text message from Austin Mohr saying he wanted to shoot students at the school during lunch break. The teen who received the instant message told a family member, and the adult notified authorities.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Mohr posed as a 19-year-old boy on a MySpace Web page with "satanic references, a picture of a tombstone and other disturbing images," Davidson said in a statement.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Mohr had also posted on the social network site that he admired two shooters responsible for the 1999 massacre at Columbine High School in Colorado.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">In the text message, Mohr directed his rage against two students, in particular, but went on to say he would kill "every person I see . . . The massacre will happen soon."</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">The teen, who claimed he was being teased and picked on at school, wrote that he wanted to lock the cafeteria door during one of the lunch periods and shoot people there, authorities said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">"The good news is that several people did the right thing along the way," Davidson said Friday during a news briefing at the middle school. "It enabled us to begin the investigation very quickly. The (principal) was instrumental in identifying some of the students involved in the conspiracy."</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Showing up at the news briefing, Charlene Russell's sister, Melissa, 16, said her sister "has never been like this before."</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Melissa Russell said her sister was in choir, made good grades and was on the honor roll. But after breaking up with her boyfriend, she "just has been talking about doing nothing."</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Charlene Russell feels bad and would take it back if she could, her sister said. After Austin Mohr started talking about plans for the shooting, Charlene Russell "went along with it because she didn't know what else to do," Melissa Russell said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Days earlier, Melissa Russell said, her sister lay on a set of railroad tracks in Orange City and had to be pulled away minutes before a train rolled by.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Attempts to reach relatives of the other teens were not successful Friday evening.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">After the threats came to light, all three students received mental-health evaluations, Davidson said, including one who was taken into a facility under the state's Baker Act.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">"The investigators determined the students did not appear to have weapons or means to carry out the threats," he said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">The students were automatically removed from the school when the plot was uncovered, Davidson said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Volusia County Schools spokeswoman Nancy Wait said DeLand Middle School Principal Matt Krajewski sent a message to parents after news of the events was released Friday, stressing that students' safety on campus was not compromised at any time.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">"We learned a lot from Columbine, and one of the lessons was to listen and take action," Wait said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">Wait said the students meet weekly for 20 minutes during homeroom to talk about bullying on campus.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">"This school has a very strong anti-bullying campaign," Wait said.</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span><br />
<span id="rssbody">rosa.ramirez@news-jrnl.com</span><br />
<span id="rssbody"></span></font></div>
<font size="1" color="#0000ff"> <span id="rssbody"><br />
</span> </font>
<div align="center"><font size="1" color="#0000ff"><span id="rssbody">~D~</span><br />
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DorothyL@womensselfesteem.com<br />
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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/32098/
MIND GAMES!<div align="left"><font face="arial" size="2"> </font><br />
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<font color="#6600ff">Have you ever been caught up in a thought that will not let you out? <br />
Escape is not an option.<br />
What was a simple drip in your pool of thoughts, quickly turned into an ocean of tidal waves rolling into each other, over and over again. This is what it feels like to not have positive control over your mind.<br />
Our minds often repeat hurtful thoughts or scenarios over and over, even when we'd much rather let them go. If you start really listening to your inner voice, you are probably dwelling on the past, remembering how someone may have let you down or how much anger you still hold back from being hurt. If you fear the challenges that are waiting for you or you are ashamed at where you are now in your life as compared to where you had planned on being, these fears will definitely be in line to play the mind game on you. All of these insecure or hurt</font></font><font face="arial" size="2"><font color="#6600ff">ful emotions that you once tucked away will come back to play when the game begins. </font></font><font face="arial" size="2"><font color="#6600ff">The problem is, when they come back, you will not recognize them and this will be your first bad move. Now the mind game begins.<br />
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The game is of the mind, to confuse you in your thought process. When your mind is triggered even slightly by a word, a picture, or even a look what we want to do is to think positive, nice, sweet and safe thoughts. If you have the slightest opening in your mind the game will begin. It will take a thought and wait for your first emotional weakness. Then it will twist that thought and magnify it so that it feeds on that weakness and sends you into that ugly world of negative thinking.<br />
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You would give anything to shake off these negative thoughts, but we all know so well that it's easier said than done. Instead you struggle through your day feeling like you are a freak and that if you do not get a grip on this mind game and soon you will explode. All that you want is to be free of negative thoughts and be happy all the time. <br />
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You spend a lot of time thinking over negative feelings and sulking over regrets and misfortunes. The worst part is that the more you try to end this horrible game that twists your brain so tight, the worse it gets. You will try to avoid your hidden shames and worries or drown them with alcohol or drugs. All that happens when that little fix-it ends is that the mind game becomes stronger. <br />
New thoughts continue, the game attacks again only to turn those thoughts against you. You can feel them escalate into negative scenarios in your mind, but at this point powerless. The power of the game is winning and you are now in the believing stage of the game. Your mind now believes your negative thoughts. You are forced to react and through this reaction the mind game soars and takes over even further. Now it not only controls you but it has also taken control of your entire world and whoever is in it at the time. You collapse from the draining feeling of failure once again. You feel that you will never be able to win this mind game. You feel that you will be a pawn for the rest of your days on earth. A doormat and a bug to stepped on over and over again because of your inability to gain strength and take control of your positive mind. So why not just give in? Why not just bow down whenever you fail to think positive thoughts? Well, I will tell you why you do not want to do that! <br />
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You are a human being with a heart and a brain. You were given the ability to feel emotions. Emotions such as: self-respect, self-esteem, humor, love, laughter, ***uality, self-confidence but most of all you were given intelligence and the will to survive. You were given the gift of life. Those are the reasons to fight. How to fight is also right there in front of you. <br />
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You are already aware of the mind game. Most of you have played it so long that you should be the champions by now. I have talked about habits many times and I will keep talking about them. Through habits you can defeat many of those mind games. Try to simplify your thoughts. The stronger the game tries to twist them the harder you work to shrink them. <br />
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I read about an interesting way to look at this. Think of your thoughts as a pop-up ad on your computer. You see it and then you don`t. Or it pops up and you simply delete it without giving it a second thought. Even if it was a negative pop-up you spend no time at all analyzing where it came from, you simply carry on with what you were doing. This is a good way to play, and win the game. Also another way to play and win is when your thought begins to twist through the negative game, start to vocalize it. Sing it quietly to yourself or hum outloud. This will confuse the game, and throw it off track. Immediately when you get a thought that seems to be fair game think of something very funny or a very sad movie that made you cry. A very good habit is to change your thought track. The game cannot keep up when the track is jumped. Be aware that your mind is a game field but you have to play it in order to win. If you do not play you will lose by defeat. SAD!!!<br />
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So my words to you is this : KICK IT`S BUTT!!!!!!! <br />
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~D~<br />
DorothyL@womensselfesteem.com<br />
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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/31887/
Forgiveness is the key to personal freedom!<div align="center"><font size="3"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><font size="3" style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><img height="160" width="132" alt="" style="display: block;" src="http://www.justblogme.com/uploads/d/Dorothy/3644.jpg" /></span></font></span></font><br />
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<font size="1"><strong><font color="#800080">What do you do when one has hurt you?<br />
One that you have trusted and cared about in your life!<br />
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What do you do when life hits you blindsided and pulls you down so fast that you almost lose your breathe, not to mention your sense of reality?<br />
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Do you become a new friend of negative thinking and allow hate, disgust, bitterness even resentment to take over your thoughts?<br />
I am here to tell you, "</font> </strong></font> </span><font size="1"><strong><font color="#800080">DO NOT <span style="font-weight: bold;">do that!"<br />
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Do not allow negative thinking to hold you down under that weight of mistrust and the desire to hurt back. It will be a very long road to nowhere fun. Happiness is not at the end of that road! <br />
The only thing that you will find is a need to avenge your pain and sorrows. You will be tricked into thinking that to hurt back is the only way to find closure or some sort of justice.<br />
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Again I am here to tell you, "</span>DO NOT<span style="font-weight: bold;"> do that!"<br />
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There is not a person on earth that has not experienced mistrust, criticism or deception in one form or another. Whether it be from a partner, child, co-worker, girl-friend or even a neighbor. When one has been hurt by a close trusted person, that hurt goes into places deep inside of your heart. It is a hurt that is almost unbearable and you feel like your life has come close to an end.<br />
If you give into that hurt and allow it to consume your thoughts, you will fall into a very ugly world of wanting to somehow pay back that person in either the same level of hurt or even a deeper hurt.<br />
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I have experienced and witnessed situations where many people including myself have allowed the negative thoughts to control and blur their thinking. It only ended up in disaster, ranging from divorce, suicide, murder, even verbal slander which we all know has its own <br />
way of causing a very irreparable wound.<br />
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The only way to survive a mistrust is to take a step towards a positive remedy and that my dear readers is to learn to forgive.<br />
To be able to forgive is the key that unlocks the doors to a <br />
new world, a positive world.<br />
To be able to let the old hurts go and move forward in YOUR <br />
life is a must in this closure.<br />
The newness of thoughts once forgiveness has been reached is what you are striving to achieve. <br />
This is your goal. <br />
A life without goals is like a life without purpose.<br />
In order to get to that point, one must learn how to forgive. <br />
Through practice and consistent positive actions and thoughts, your mind will eventually open up and allow forgiveness. Once you have decided to reach out and forgive, you will immediately feel weight lift. You will feel immediate results of freedom.<br />
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To hold onto the hurts and negative memories will only result <br />
in further hurting one person and that person is YOU!<br />
In any emotional trauma, to hold onto the nightmares and memories only creates a new abuser, that being our own selves.<br />
Forgiveness is but a jumble of letters, it is a mere word. The <br />
action of this word is the vital key involved in finding this new <br />
freedom.<br />
It is through an acceptance of a negative situation that has happened and is over and a commitment or decision to let it go forever, that will help you to learn how to replace the power of that negative trap.<br />
It is also imperative to work on freeing yourself as quickly as <br />
possible. The longer you dwell and hold onto hurt and mistrust, the farther and more out of control you will become from reaching forgiveness. <br />
One more very important thought that will help you is, that by forgiving and moving on, in no way does this mean that what has happened to you was not a wrong doing or that the person that has hurt you should be free of guilt. Also, this positive move forward through forgiveness does not mean that you are excusing or reducing the action against you. <br />
What it does mean is that you are allowing yourself the freedom to take control of your thoughts and move forward.<br />
You are identifying with the fact that your act of forgiveness is <br />
for YOU not the other person involved.<br />
You have replaced your position as victim and prisoner which removes the power of the opposing person and event that caused so much despair.<br />
You have taken your right of choice and have moved toward a healthier, happier pattern of thoughts which will create the freedom to live!<br />
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Remember, your choice to forgive has no bearing on how the <br />
other person reacts, thinks or chooses to live. The choices you <br />
make are for YOU and your happiness alone and for the freedom of thought.<br />
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<font color="#800080">" To Be Wronged Is Nothing Unless You Choose To Remember It"</font><br />
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<div align="center"><font size="1"><strong><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><em><font color="#333333"><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"></span></font><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"><font color="#000000">Keep moving forward people!</font></span></em></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><em><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"><font color="#000000"> ~D~</font></span></em></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 102);"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><em><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"><font color="#000000"> Dorothyl@womensselfesteem.com</font></span></em></span></span></span><br />
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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/31540/
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<strong><font color="#339966"><em style="background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">Have a very positive and powerful day <br />
~D~<br />
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http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy/31439/