Dragons Fandango

UBVE #3...

2012-02-08T13:54:00.001Z

2011-12-28T15:30:00.000Z

Somewhat late, but I only finished editing 10 minutes before having to catch the train to head up to visit my parents for Christmas. So, here it is, Un:Bound Video Editions episode 2 - Zombies:

A competition associated to the show is up and running on the official blog until January 5th 2012.

UBVE #2: Zombies Trailer

2011-11-02T19:11:00.000Z

UBVE #2 Teaser...

2011-10-09T22:29:00.000+01:00

Me, reading

2011-10-03T23:47:00.002+01:00

The sound is quiet, so you might need to turn your volume up, and, well, it's me reading, so you might want to turn the picture down, but this is my performance in my 11am slot at FantasyCon 2011.

Some photos from Venezia

2011-09-26T20:49:00.005+01:00

Incantus Printiamus!

2011-09-05T21:33:00.004+01:00

Okay, I'm a little late to the party with this (and what a party it is, what with the balloon and the candle and the second-hand party-popper), but 'The Office of Lost and Found' is now available in print!

It's still available digitally as well, which means you can now choose between the following flavours:

eBook:

pBook:

The print versions also include 'Extra Bonus Feature Easter Eggs':

Artwork never before seen unless you've looked at my Flickr pages
The Office of Lost and Found short story I posted on this very blog for Christmas
Scans of some of my hand-written notes scrawled during the writing process

And because I have been tardy with this news, I shall hereby post an exclusive extra bonus feature to those bonus features - the first page of those hand-written notes with some extra notes added to offer some insight into what the first set of notes was going on about! Hurrah!

Suffice to say, this will include spoilers for anyone who hasn't read the book. If you dare brave the spoilers or have read the book, then by all means click the pic below for an enbiggened version.

Sampling Writers

2011-08-22T18:16:00.007+01:00

A brief on-line conversation around lunchtime today set me wondering if there was any relationship between the kind of fiction people write and their professional background. I have a vague notion that crime-writers are somewhat more likely to have a background in journalism or law, while SF/F/H seem to be drawn more from the ranks of the teaching and IT professions. Is that backed up by the facts though?

This led me to look at setting up a quick survey*. Two simple questions:

- What is / was your primary occupation? (Maybe allow selection of two or three)

- What genre do you predominantly write in? (Again, maybe allow selection of two or three)

Simple enough until I started thinking about the best way of characterising what it is that people write. The standard genres are fine - crime, horror, romance, science fiction, fantasy - until you start thinking about whether 'thrillers' fit into crime, if 'adventure' counts as genre and whether it's necessary to delve into sub-genres like paranormal romance or alternate history.

So, I decided to take a different tack. What if I covered all these bases by using a different breakdown?

Setting in time:

- Historical

- Contemporary

- Futuristic

Setting in place:

- 'Real' Earth (fits within generally held notions of history and physics)

- 'Alternate' Earth (allows alternate time-lines or existence of magic, for example)

- Beyond Earth (outer space or other planets)

- Fantasy Realm (no relation to our Earth required)

Primary Conflict/Drama:

- Comedy

- Crime

- Romance

- Adventure

- War

- Horror

- Mystery

- Social

- None (a.k.a. Literary - arf)

- Etc.

Okay, as may be obvious, this third category was tricky. I couldn't even think of a good name for it, given I was trying to avoid 'genre'. But that aside, it made clear something that has no doubt been commented on countless times in the past - lumping crime and fantasy, for example, into a bucket called 'genre', is the taxonomic equivalent of mixing metaphors. 'Crime' tells you about the central drama, but nothing about the setting. On the other hand, 'Fantasy' tells you nothing about the central drama, but rather more about the setting. Of course, in both cases assumptions are made about the flip-side of the coin - crime is typically contemporary and set on an Earth recognisable as our own - while fantasy can be stereotyped as elves and orcs going to war over some costume jewellery.

Now I've finished stating the obvious, I'll open up the question I struggled with so I can stop thinking about it and go cook some dinner:

- For the purposes of the survey outlined, how would you categorise the kind of fiction people write? It needs to be simple enough to be manageable (i.e. not every sub-genre and cross-over under the sun), but also detailed enough to highlight if there is a difference between those who write space opera and those who write hard SF.

* - At this stage me actually creating the survey in this version of reality is still an entirely hypothetical happenstance.

LFLogo

2011-07-29T22:01:00.004+01:00

Okay, so instead of getting on with the book covers I'm supposed to be doing or writing the short story I'm supposed to be finishing, this evening I have been cleaning up the logo used on the cover for the first draft copies of Lost and Found...

BEFORE:

AFTER:

Release Day

2011-07-03T09:48:00.003+01:00

So, it's finally happened. It's now possible to buy one of my books on Amazon. The giddy novelty is sure to wear off eventually, but for the time being, I'll do my best to appreciate the moment. Here's a new trailer to watch to mark the occasion.

P.S. I should also say that the piano samples mixed into the music for both trailers so far were produced by HardstyleRythm and downloaded from Looperman.

Lost and Found Reviews (and Interviews)

2011-06-28T15:38:00.013+01:00

Reviews are now starting to filter in for 'The Office of Lost and Found'. I don't know whether I'll keep this post up to date with every review (I imagine I'll lose track sooner or later), but these are the ones I know about so far, in order of posting, along with quotes I haven't taken entirely out of context:

First Draft reviews:

3rd., September, 2010 - Un:Bound - "... excellent storytelling, compelling characters and unrelenting movement."

Advanced Review Copy reviews:

26th., June, 2011 - The Eloquent Page - "... splendidly quirky detective story..."

27th., June, 2011 - I Will Read Books - "... fun, scary, surprising and bizarre." (Note: contains a few spoilers for the opening chapters)

28th., June, 2011 - Tony's Thoughts - "I would recommend this book to anyone who is slightly unhinged..."

29th., June, 2011 - Guilty Conscience - "... grips you from the beginning and hurls you around like some kind of giant... hurling machine."

Post-Release reviews:

20th., July, 2011 - Terror-Tree - "Overall, the novel is a real achievement and shows the author’s future potential, as well as being fun and entertaining."

21st., July, 2011 - A Gathering of Opinions - "Definitely worth checking out."

4th., August, 2011 - Geek Syndicate - "... an incredibly original debut novel..."

23rd., August, 2011 - Floor to Ceiling Books - "... did not have a single clue what was happening. Not one clue [...] It just wasn't for me."

6th., September, 2011 - Stanley Riik's Blog / Morpheus Tales #14 Supplement - "I doubt you have ever read anything like it, or will again. It’s a spectacular insanity..."

14th., September, 2011 - SF Book - "It's either completely genius or just totally nuts... If you are the adventurous sort and can stand the breakneck pace and concentration level required then you too should love it."

3rd., December, 2011 - Crime Fiction Lover - "It’s no rules crime, mystery, and fantasy from beginning to end."

21st., December, 2011 - Book Reviews by Elizabeth A. White - "Quite simply, The Office of Lost & Found is a deliciously demented, exquisitely written, massive dose of humor-infused creative madness which easily made my Top 5 Reads of 2011."

'The Office of lost and Found' on Goodreads.com.

Interviews:

2nd., July, 2011 - Guilty Conscience

18th., July, 2011 - Terror-Tree

The Anarchy Books list of me-related info.:

Vincent Holland-Keen updates

Slow painting after speed painting

2011-06-24T22:23:00.005+01:00

Okay, it took a couple more evenings to turn those initial sketches into a finished picture and the finished picture is somewhat flawed, but it's been good practice so maybe the next one will be better. I still can't shake the feeling that copying rather than dreaming up from your imagination is cheating, but if the ends are better, I guess that justifies the means.

Oh, and apparently the photo I chose to copy was of Leighton Meester, in case you were wondering. She's known for starring in Gossip Girl and should not be confused with Leighton Buzzard, which is a town in central Bedfordshire.

Speed painting

2011-06-22T22:34:00.005+01:00

I've made a few attempts at speed painting in Photoshop recently, but haven't got very far, usually because I started out without a clear idea of what I wanted to do and so gave up quite quickly. I was also struggling to paint faces that I was happy with. So, to get around both those problems, I thought I would cheat. I found a photograph on the internet to copy then saw how much I could do in an hour. And this was the result...

Sketch:

Shade:

Colour:

I might try finishing it later, because I suspect the touches that would make it look more like a photo and less like an airbrushed drawing are going to be a challenge in themselves.

Moo

2011-06-18T21:10:00.003+01:00

Business cards. Authors. Cheesy awkward self-promotion. Three things that often go together. On the other hand, it's a lot easier to hand over a card than it is to explain to someone how to spell my name. So, I thought I would try doing some MOO cards. Rather than just use the cover artwork, I knocked up a few different pictures this evening to use. I also thought of doing some sort of Top Trump collectible card game-thing with them, but after due consideration decided I was getting just a little carried away by this point.

The Blurb of Lost and Found

2011-06-13T19:18:00.002+01:00

As I don't think I've actually posted the blurb for the book yet and because I was asked for one in the comments to the trailer post, here it is...

THE OFFICE OF LOST AND FOUND

by VINCENT HOLLAND-KEEN

Thomas Locke can find anything. You know the hurricane that hit a while back? Word is he found the butterfly that started it. So, when a desperate Veronica Drysdale hires Locke to find her missing husband, it makes perfect sense.

Except the world of Thomas Locke doesn't make sense. It puts monsters under the bed, makes stars fall from the sky and leads little children to worship the marvels of road-works.

This world also hides from Veronica a past far darker and stranger than she could ever have imagined. To learn the truth, Veronica is going to have to lose everything.

And that's where Locke’s shadowy business partner Lafarge comes in…

FOCUS ON -

· DARK COMEDY
· TWISTED CRIME NOIR
· SUPERNATURAL HORROR
· ACTION AND SUSPENSE

If you like The Office of Lost and Found, try:

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency by Douglas Adams
Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman
The Thief of Always by Clive Barker
Aberystwyth Mon Amour by Malcolm Pryce

So, this is what I spent my weekend doing...

2011-06-05T20:18:00.000+01:00

Coming Soon No. 1

2011-06-04T13:26:00.002+01:00

Book update

2011-05-31T15:36:00.002+01:00

After 87 years, 256 days, 18 hours, 23 minutes and 8 seconds, I have finally finished copy-editing 'The Office of Lost and Found'. It has now gone off to Anarchy Books, which means my life is now once again blissfully aimless and without meaning.

Low-Quality Photographising

2011-05-23T21:52:00.008+01:00

Here's some photos I took while taking a break from Crimefest and wandering up to the Clifton suspension bridge. The picture quality's a bit ropey because they were taken on my iPhone. To paraphrase multitudinous spam emails, click pic to embiggenify (which you might need to do to spot the people climbing the cliff in pic 3).

Copy-editing

2011-04-29T09:36:00.005+01:00

I've been tweeting about my progress copy-editing 'The Office of Lost and Found' ad nauseum lately, so for those who aren't familiar with what this entails, I thought I'd write this quick post as a break from the aforementioned copy-editing.

The following passage serves as an example. This first version is pretty much unchanged from when I initially wrote it about four years ago:

Locke and Veronica stood outside the toilets of the Dodo nightclub.

“Nothing unusual in the ladies’,” shouted Veronica over the music. “Did you find anything?”

Locke didn’t reply, his eyes searching the gloom around them.

“Thomas, did you find anything?” asked Veronica again.

He looked back at her. Beneath his fleshy cheeks, his jaw muscles were clenched. A worry line creased the skin between his eyebrows. Still he said nothing. Veronica’s nostrils flared. She stormed into the gents’ toilet.

Shouts of protest greeted her entrance, shortly followed by a handful of smutty remarks. She ignored them and conducted her own investigation of the interior. Water covered the floor. It came from the flush of the left-most urinal, the basin of which lay in two pieces on the floor. A section of tiles above were either missing or veined with cracks. When Veronica looked down, she saw packets of condoms floating on the water. The fascia of the vending machine by the door hung loose, the rest of it beaten out of shape. Locke stood in the doorway. She had questions to ask him: What happened here? Who did this? Why didn’t the bouncers mention this kind of trouble? But staring into his eyes, she realised he didn’t have the answers. Instead, she saw that his questions went further: Why could no one tell them that something had happened here? Why could no one tell them who the dismembered girl was? How could eight murders leave no clues and no trace of a killer?

And then Veronica understood the expression on Locke’s face. It was fear. For they both knew who could lose things so completely they would never be found again.

It then took me about an hour this morning to turn it into the revised version below. The scene it describes is pretty much unchanged, instead what I've tried to do is make the English as clear as possible.

Veronica emerged from the ladies toilet at the Dodo nightclub.

“Nothing in there,” she shouted to Locke over the music. “Anything in the gents?”

He leant against a wall with the front of his shirt collar gripped in a fist. His nostrils flared with each rapid breath. His eyes danced frantic saccades.

“Thomas, did you find anything?”

He muttered a reply she couldn’t hear.

“Forget it. I’ll go look myself.”

Veronica stormed into the men’s toilet. Shouts of protest were quickly followed by an assortment of smutty remarks. She ignored them.

Water covered the floor. Packets of condoms floated beneath a vending machine that had been beaten out of shape. The source of the flooding was the left-most urinal, the basin of which lay in two pieces on the floor. A section of tiles above were either missing or veined with cracks. Blood splattered the area.

She returned to Locke, bristling with questions. What happened here? Who did this? Why didn’t the bouncers mention this kind of trouble?

His vacant eyes revealed that he didn’t have any answers, only more questions. Why could no one tell them who the dismembered girl was? How could eight murders leave no clues and no trace of a killer?

It was then Veronica understood why Locke gripped his own collar so tightly the flesh around his knuckles turned white. She understood why his eyes desperately sought out an alternative explanation and she shared his fear, because they both knew who could lose things so completely they would never be found again.

I'm sure some people will prefer the earlier version, but, well, tough.

Book trailers

2011-04-27T13:03:00.003+01:00

Right, I'm busy at the moment copy-editing 'The Office of Lost and Found' prior to sending a final draft off to the publisher, but once that's done, I will be looking at producing a trailer and I'll be looking to make a bit different to most book trailers in that I'm hoping it'll be good*.

So, I thought I'd chart my progress here and kick off by listing a few basic principles I'll be keeping in mind:

Make it dynamic, rather than static. A series of still images is certainly cost-effective, but tricky to make exciting.

Use a bare minimum of on-screen text. Again, it's cheap and easy to explain your plot with titles, but it doesn't make the best use of the medium. Relaying the plot through spoken dialogue and dramatic action is much more effective.

In fact, the two points above could be replaced by the assertion that Hollywood have perfected the art of making trailers over decades. Examine their style and steal liberally.

The budget isn't the cost. Far more important than the amount of cash available is the value of the time, expertise and equipment you have access to. Stories occasionally crop up of some astounding short film made for pennies. These are usually completely fraudulent. Yes, the budget was 6p, but it was made by an industry professional, who got his industry mates to provide their years of experience for free, along with top-end kit that would have cost hundreds to rent or tens of thousands to buy. The 6p is the low-budget equivalent of studio accounting and handily ignores the fact that the producers had £60,000 of talent and kit to hand. It works the other way around too. Spending £60,000 on cast, crew and equipment doesn't necessarily mean you'll get better results than taking the 6p route; borrowing a camera, asking friends to help out and cutting everything together on your home PC.

Suffice to say, I shall be taking the 6p route. However, I already own a fair amount of filmmaking hardware and software and I've been practising the craft for ten years or thereabouts, so I will be disappointed in myself if I can't produce something that looks like it costs £60,000. I've put together an animated storyboard** that looks like it cost maybe £6, so I'm well on the way already.

* - There are some very good book trailers out there, but they are few and far between.

** - No, I'm not going to show you it, because it'll just spoil the effect of the proper trailer when it's done. However, I may be posting up the odd 'shot-in-progress' as development progresses.

The Office of Lost and Found

2011-04-04T10:05:00.005+01:00

Barring unforeseen calamities, it looks like the great book-reading public will finally get the opportunity to acclaim/scorn/ignore 'The Office of Lost and Found', which is due to be released as an e-book from 'Anarchy Books' ~~on June 1st, 2011~~ in July, 2011. Find the official announcement here.

More practising

2011-03-28T20:20:00.001+01:00

The Office of Lost and Found

2011-03-06T21:45:00.003Z

Modes

2011-03-04T22:20:00.001Z

Ooh, there are brush 'modes' as well. Thus, more playing.