Dump that Jerk-A Hannah Joy Publishing.com Blog

About the One who Said I'm "Not What You're Looking for Physically or Mentally"

2012-02-19T00:44:00.000-08:00

In my last post about a person who said I wasn't what his was "looking for physically or mentally" I forgot to mention, I almost stupidly continued to kiss the behind of this person. I thought maybe if I did I would get him to fee the way he used to. But then one day I thought, why should I? I can just be with someone who IS attracted to me.

I'm not playing any stupid chasing games with jerks who want to act like they are into me and then all of the sudden decide they are not. If it's partly my fault so be it, but men like that who use women all their lives intentionally try to make women like me feel so insecure.

Well, I'm not going to let them. Not anymore. I know there are people out there who like me and appreciate me. I don't need him.

I DON'T NEED HIM!

And he will never see me again! He and I will never be friends we will never ever be anything ever!

I was better off never seeing that person again ever. It was a huge mistake for me to even see him because all he does is play games! I don't ever want to see him or talk to him again!

The Lamest Excuse I Ever Heard: 'You're Not What I'm Looking for Physically or Mentally"

2012-02-18T20:03:00.000-08:00

It's hardly a breakup excuse. After all, we were never going out. Therefore, of course I wasn't supposed to have any feelings.

Anyway, I finally told this person-who about a year and a half before that seemed to be so into me-that I wanted to be with him. I wanted to spend my life with him. I don't know I guess it was too late. (I was dealing with some personal issues plus trying to get to the bottom of what kind of person this was who seemed supposedly so into me was that wanted another chance from me after breaking my heart once before.)

When I finally decided to give him another chance-the chance that he originally begged for-what he said to me was this: "You're not what I'm looking for physically or mentally." I don't know what his reasons for changing his mind about me were but all I can say in response to this is...

Only the poorest, most despicable excuse for a man would say something as degrading and as awful as that. Was that really necessary? He could just say he was over me or that he's not into me anymore? Unless he apologizes I will always think of him as the lowest-life person on the face of this planet!!

After that, I decided that I know a new sexual position he can try. It's called "Go screw yourself!" I'm sick of losers like that that think they can just decide one minute they care about someone then the next minute decide she's nothing but a worthless piece of crap to him.

If he was hurt by something I said all he had to do is say so. Not say something so completely low and awful. A person like that never really loved me and I have decided I will never talk to him again. I hope he found someone else's emotions and mind to play with because that's exactly what he is-a player and he plays games.

In case anyone knows who I am talking about...

Men like that are the reason women when they are older shack up with or marry people they don't even love. They are tired of the heartbreak of men who think they are so great because they can act like jerks and still have women crawling all over them. The insanity has to stop. Men like this do not deserve to be happy if this is the way they treat women!

2011-12-22T16:06:00.000-08:00

Inspiration and empowerment for women who have been left for someone else: Forget him and find someone who really does want to be with you. Read more>>

2011-12-22T15:31:00.000-08:00

Misery loves company. That's why it's sometimes better to just be alone. Read more >>>

I Never Wanted to be the Damsel in Distress

2011-12-04T15:03:00.000-08:00

For awhile (and even now) I'm wanting to feel more sure of my own financial situation. I realize some guys like the damsel in distress but I believe any woman with any amount of self-respect would have her own money.

That way, she knows in her heart she is with a man because she wants to be, not because of his money. I personally haven't believed in Prince Charming since approximately age seven and a half anyway.

I don't even want Prince Charming because I've actually been with that type. They are annoying. Oftentimes they say and do all the right things but they know very little about other aspects of love.

Romance is a form of love but it's not the only aspect of love that is important to me. Wit and charm and/or even good looks may get a woman to marry a man or it may get her to sleep with him, but it won't make the relationship last.

How I Cheer Myself Up When Feeling Rejected

2011-12-03T14:57:00.000-08:00

If a guy doesn't have feelings for me or is not attracted to me at least I know there are people who are out there that are. Now if I was only more attracted to one of those people-especially more attracted to my current boyfriend. He doesn't reject me. He actually likes me.

My life would definitely be much easier if I could appreciate what I have right now. I would no longer need the jerks who think they are better than they really are (and I know I am repeating myself). Because then I'd at least have feelings for a person who has feelings for me and doesn't want to leave me.

And if anyone of my jerk exes wants to preach at me about how insecure or needy I supposedly am he can just “stick it.” I don't need anyone that much. I did just fine before meeting anyone I was with and I will do just find without him now.

(But if I have any reason to feel at least a little bit insecure most of my exes are the reason. Most of them actually had the nerve to think they were better than me. Still, I don't think that badly of myself.)

I guess, it would be only fair if I admit one thing though...

I never wanted to be the damsel in distress. I always believed it would be better to know I can fully take care of myself to fully appreciate any man. If a man doesn't understand that then he is the one who is insecure. More about this is in my next post.

The Best Form of Revenge Against My Exes (Not Violence)

2011-12-02T19:55:00.000-08:00

Continued from “I'm Sorry for Hurtful Things I've Said...”

The Best Form of Revenge Against My Exes (Not Violence)

The best form of revenge against my exes would be to marry someone twice as good-looking, three times more stable, and four times as rich as all of my exes put together. Yet, that person hopefully will actually really love me enough to want to stay with me unlike any one of the others did. And, hopefully I will genuinely love that person back.

That would teach all my exes who have ever thought I wasn't good enough-or to try to make me feel I wasn't good enough just because they were confused-a lesson. That would make up for all the pain and heartache I ever endured by the people who thought they were better than they were.

I'm trying to forgive and move on. However, I get tired of feeling like other women are better than me. I'm out to show my exes that I am fine just the way I am even if to them I was a worthless piece of crap.

I Don't Take Rejection as Well Anymore, But I'm not Going to Live in Self-Pity

2011-12-02T14:41:00.000-08:00

Note: I've no more hurt feelings towards all but one of my exes right now. That's progress right? Forgiveness is instant but emotional healing is sometimes a process. I don't want to hold onto bitterness.

However, I sometimes cannot help but feel hurt when I think of how worthless I felt at times when I was rejected or at least felt rejected. I have to make myself feel better somehow, don't I? Also, sometimes I just need to vent.

I am doing this in hopes to heal from all hurts of relationships past. That way, some day I can be ready for the right person.

Now...onto the entry...

I have to admit that I do sometimes feel bad about mean stuff I say to guys when I feel rejected by them. All I can say is I'm sorry. I guess I say hurtful things sometimes because I don't take rejection as well as I used to. Also, I realize some day if I want to be married I have to accept a person exactly as he is.

However, being sorry and even apologizing does not mean I'm going to sit around feeling sorry for myself because someone doesn't want to be with me. Some people might think I play vindictive games, but I don't.

That is not my intention, at least for the most part. I just want to let anyone who ever rejected me know that I'm not just some pathetic loser just because one person or another didn't choose me. I show this by proving that I am desirable by other people who actually do find me attractive.

Sometimes it can be frustrating though. There was a time when I was going to just stay single for awhile and just focus on myself. The reason why is part of me is not sure I'm good enough for the type of guys I really want to date. Then, when I know I am satisfied with myself, I know I am good enough for people other than jerks.

It's not entirely true though that I'm not good enough for nicer guys though. Not only that but when I was in college I made eye contact with a guy who I thought never would've given me the time of day in high school. It's moments like these that help me remember that I'm not really as much of a loser as some of my exes would sometimes like to make me out to be-so it seemed to me at times.

Just because one guy doesn't want me doesn't mean that there aren't three or four other guys who do at any given time. I just happen to always fall for the ones who are too unsure of themselves. Therefore, they are naturally going to be unsure of me.

And I get sick and tired of babying this type, only to find out they will still reject me anyway. That is, the ones who try to think they are better than me as a way to boost their self-esteem still reject me anyway.

They reject me because they-even though they try to put me in my place and keep me feeling worthless-feel they are not good enough. Some men just simply think that acting like a jerk is going to win me over, but eventually unlike most women it will drive me away for good.

By the way, I personally think men who do this are just huge cowards. They are the type who will also run at the sign of any relationship trouble, always on the never-ending quest for something or someone perfect.

However, I should admit I don't take rejection as well as I used to...

I'm starting to wonder if something is seriously wrong with me. But not everything is my fault. I know I have good things to offer to the right person and one day everyone else really is going to be sorry they ever rejected me.

But my version of ultimate revenge is not violence, except for maybe some hurtful words here and there that I shouldn't have said when I was hurt. I'm sorry for that, but I'm not sorry for the next few paragraphs I am about to write in a new entry coming soon.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #15: My Money Should Be Enough for Her...

2011-12-01T06:36:00.000-08:00

This is the kind of ad that perhaps should be written by an older gentleman who wants to buy the affection and company of a younger woman. It's not even about buying love and its not about buying sex either. It is about using money to control that woman who might become financially dependent on him and feel too trapped to seek out true love. See below.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #13

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who thinks he is a great catch because he's willing to bail her out financially whenever she needs it. I'm a great catch because I'm financially stable, but never mind the fact that I have no love to give or nothing else to offer a woman emotionally.

I am willing to give her cash as a gift and never want to be seen in public with her or never want to have to take her out. I will be willing to do overnights with a rented DVD once in awhile at my place, but I am in no way ever going to show up where she lives. Her life is boring, and this relationship is meant to be all about me and my needs, not at all about hers.

He Says that I 'Put him On a Pedestal' Ha! He Wishes!

2011-11-30T09:14:00.000-08:00

For instance, one guy told me (after finding out I still have feelings for him), “I think you put me on a pedestal.”

When he said that I thought...OMG seriously?! You did not just say that!

Oh, but he did.

It was right then and there that I realized I overdid it. I must've told him too many good things to encourage him. Since then, I have barely had not much nice to say to him anymore. What's the point? If he's just going to act conceited and think he's better than me when I'm nice to him there's no point at all.

In fact, recently I stopped talking to him period. I am so hurt by him being so conceited that I don't even have anything nice to say to him anymore. Therefore, I think it's just better if I don't say anything to him at all.

Put him on a pedestal. Gimme a break! He wishes! Who does he think he is? He can see me in another 20 or 30 years. I'm done. Jerks like this don't deserve to be happy.

Update

I wrote this when I was really preturbed, mad, angry...p*ssed off. Therefore, this post as well as others on this blog should be taken with a grain of salt.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #14: I Must Be Her World

2011-11-30T00:30:00.000-08:00

I man who expects a woman to drop everything to be with her is borderline psycho in my opinion. Either that or he is just playing games. This is how his ad would read if he is honest. He is usually a cold-hearted, controlling man just looking for a midnight booty call.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #14

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who is willing to drop all of her plans and wrap her entire life around me even though I don't know what I want. I am not ready for or interested in a committed relationship. Even though I keep her guessing she must never break up with me because I don't want to have to look for a new partner.

I just want sex and not to have to meet her friends or her family, but she's welcome to meet my friends and family if she wants. I should be her life, not her career, education, or anything else that could get in the way of our one-sided relationship that really is not a relationship at all.

She must never date others even though I mostly only want her on the weekends and holidays, preferably after 10pm. (And its not even because I work second shift!) Oh and she must never deny me, and shame on her for wanting to see anyone else who actually wants her during the day.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #13: A Low Self-Esteem Is a Plus...

2011-11-29T13:23:00.000-08:00

This is probably one of the worst types of jerk personal ads that could be written if a guy was honest to himself and the world about what he wants. He might be looking for love eventually, but not with the person he probably has in his life now who if she new better would realize she is too good for him, not the other way around. Please read the following jerk ad.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #13

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who has as low of a self-esteem as possible. That way, she will think she is no good and I will never have to look for a new sex partner again. A virgin is a plus. I'm willing to teach her how much of an unworthy person she really is. She will be ruined for other men when she finally gets with me.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #12: Must Not Feel Good About Herself...

2011-11-28T23:20:00.000-08:00

Some (not all) men will dredge up whatever excuse they have for not being committed. It often starts with hooking in a woman they know does not think too highly of herself. Read this.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #12

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who feels as if she is good enough for me to have sex with but is not good enough to marry. I want a woman like this because they are so easy to convince that they are not good enough and that they have all these changes to make before I could ever love her. If I have a woman like this it could at least buy me a few years of free sex.

It may be over with when she wises up and I might decide I love her after it's too late and she's long gone. But at least I got the sex I wanted.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #11: Must be a Virgin

2011-11-28T19:17:00.000-08:00

This would be the personal ad of a man who admits he has a double standard about sexual histories. Just check it out and see if you agree.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #11

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who doesn't mind that I have a double standard. She must be a virgin who doesn't mind that I've slept with over three dozen people in my lifetime. She's a whore if she's slept around but I'm the king if I slept around!

2011-11-28T07:13:00.001-08:00

Nowadays when a guy uses his kids or his ex as an excuse not to want to date me I will show him this quote, “This is (one of) the world's smallest blog posts written to tell you I don't feel sorry for you anymore.”

I'm tired of the drama.

I've Heard That Excuse Before

2011-11-28T07:09:00.001-08:00

There is one excuse that I get so sick of when it comes to dating men. The ones who have kids always talk about how they have to be careful who they date because of their kid(s).

From my experience it is a total load of crap. The real reason they think they have to be careful and cautious is usually because of some ex who hurt them. Usually the sob story is that this ex cheated on them.

I used to feel sorry for men like this, and I tried to be patient and understanding. However, after being jerked around by two single dads I'm just not so nice anymore. Nowadays when a guy uses his children as an excuse not to get close to a woman I just think to myself...(and maybe even tell him)...

What about me? Don't I have a right to be happy?

When is it my turn to get the man who wants to give me everything like he did for his cheating ex? When? When will I ever find anyone who loves me just as much as he loved his former wife or girlfriend? When???

I'm tired of the excuses!

I'm tired of the excuses and I'm tired of being made to feel guilty because I want to be happy, like I'm supposed to stick around for years and years until he is finally over her. I know it's partly my fault because I was told when I was younger not to date someone who talks about their ex all the time.

However, I just couldn't help it. The older I got the more desperate I got because it's hard to find single men around who are emotionally available. I guess it also doesn't help much that I am rarely ever attracted to emotionally available men.

It's hard too. Men who have children to take care of have no idea how hard it is for single women to be a part of their lives knowing some day they may never even get to see those kids again!

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #10: I Don't Have Time, But She Better Have the Time...

2011-11-28T01:13:00.000-08:00

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who must understand that I don't have time for a relationship because I still have a half dozen exes who I would like to be able to see and sleep with whenever I want. If she can accept this about me I may or may not eventually marry her or maybe some day I will stop keeping her guessing. She must be with me and only me.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #9: She Must be Patient and Understanding...

2011-11-27T21:10:00.000-08:00

If a man were honest about the fact that he just wants sex and is not ready for a new relationship before getting that sex, maybe his ad would read like as follows.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #9

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who should be patient and understanding because I have a lot of leftover baggage from my my previous relationship. I'm willing to let her drive over to my house any time she wants, but she will only be my girlfriend around my guy friends and not around other females.

Also, even though I am willing to have her over to my house any time I call for her, I will not ever tolerate being expected to ever show up at her place. I don't care about her life at all and I want someone who will understand it is all about me. As much as she wants it to be, it's never going to be about her and the relationship must always be on my terms, not hers.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #8: I'm Having a Midlife Crisis...

2011-11-27T16:07:00.000-08:00

I wonder what a man's personal ad whose married and in a midlife crisis and unhappy in his marriage would read if he chose to tell young women he meets the truth. If there was no need to justify cheating, and maybe if he didn't feel like he had to lie, perhaps his ad would read something like the one shown below.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #8

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who has a perfect body even though I can't even pull my shirt over my belly flaps. I'm in a midlife crisis so the younger the better and we must be discreet. I don't want my overweight wife to find out. If you give me good enough sex I will divorce my wife and be with you at least until you cheat on me with a younger man.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #7: Must be Totally on Texting Basis...

2011-11-27T11:06:00.000-08:00

I wonder what the personal ad of a man who acts like he has something to hide would read if he were to admit he was hiding something. Mabye it would read as follows.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #7

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman to talk to on texting basis only. Yet, I don't want her to be with anyone else. I also want a woman I'm not sure I want to be with. Yet, I don't want to let her date other people. She must be there for me even though I keep her guessing about how I feel about her.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #6: It Must be Entirely on My Terms...

2011-11-27T00:02:00.000-08:00

I'm wondering what the ad of a man who puts very little into what is supposed to be a committed relationship would be like. That is, if he were to admit up front that he wants a woman who is willing to accept that he thinks the relationship is all about him. I have my suspicions it could be like what I have presented below.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #6

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who doesn't mind that I don't want to meet her mom even if she has met mine. I also am seeking a female who never asks me to go to her parent's house for the holidays or never asks me to go to any family occasions.

She's more than welcome to enter my family world though and I welcome any comfort when my life is full of drama. Any comfort she needs will not be reciprocated by me, but she still better not think about dating other people.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #5: Looking for Sweet, Kind, and Sexy...

2011-11-26T21:58:00.000-08:00

I'm wondering what the ad of a man who admits he treats women like a dog would read like. Maybe it would be something like what is displayed below.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #5

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who is sweet, kind, and sexy. She must be able to handle my subtle put-downs that I used to keep her thinking she doesn't deserve any better than me. All she can expect from me is to just want her around for sex, and I am willing to pay attention to her for a few minutes after dinner is served.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #4: Must Always Shut up and Put Out

2011-11-26T18:53:00.000-08:00

Run of the mill jerk looking for a woman who shuts up and puts out whenever I ask her to. Even though I'm a verbal abuser who you can tell by the way I talk that I have no respect for women, she must remain committed to me.

Any games played are ones I start. Other that that, its okay for me to talk to exes but it's not okay for her to do it. Oh, and did I mention that I weight 300 pounds but I expect her to look like last month's Playboy model?

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #3: Need Perfect Face and Body...

2011-11-26T15:49:00.000-08:00

If a man who normally likes to use wit and charm and/or play with women's emotions to get what they want were honest with women that he just wants sex what would his personal ad read? I sometimes wonder. I think perhaps it would be as shown below.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #3

Run of the mill jerk who thinks only with his sch-long is looking for the woman with the perfect face and body. I expect her to be in love with me even though I have a beer belly that is the size of her bathtub. She must never desire another man but it's okay if I do whatever I want with other women. Oh, and breakfast in bed is a plus but I still won't marry her.

Run of the Mill Jerk Personal Ad #2: Looking for the Perfect Woman...

2011-11-26T12:48:00.000-08:00

Run of the mill jerk looking for the perfect woman. She must be able to cook and should always be at my beck and call. She must never complain even if I ignore her completely all the time except for when I want sex.