my dyalog

NaNoWriMo 2013 - Day 1

2013-11-01T01:00:00.001-05:00

Well here we are in the first hour of National Novel Writing Month, aka NaNoWriMo, 2013. With nine minutes left in the hour my word count is at 1951 and I'm ready for some sleep. My brain is tired and I keep finding myself re-reading my work and editing.

Now normally, editing is a good thing. A very good thing indeed. But during NaNoWriMo it is highly discouraged. One of the major objectives of this event is to write with abandon. No thinking, no editing, just writing, getting it out there. Easy enough, right?

Yeah... no. Not for me anyway. Every time I go back and read something I've written I catch myself correcting, rewriting, EDITING.

I blame my control issues. And my deep rooted need to have everything around me be perfect, even though I know that's impossible. Silly me.

Despite the error of my ways (and that damned, red ink, virtual editing pen!) I have managed to crank out 1951 words in less than an hour. And this post. I think that's a pretty auspicious start. Yay me!

If I expect to keep up this pace, I'd be wise to get some sleep. And with that, I bid you all bon nuit.

Until next time - here's to 50K words in 30 days!

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Journaling and NaNoWriMo

2013-10-24T12:51:00.001-05:00

It appears that the time has come for my [quarterly? bi-annual?] blog check-in with a post about another one of my random ambitions.

As you may remember if you've followed me for any length of time, I have bounced from knitter, crocheter, photographer, book and movie critic, occasional fashionista, embroiderer, skin care creator and soaper. Yes, the old adage of "jack of all trades, master of none" definitely applies here. In fact, I am probably the embodiment of that cliche. I keep telling myself I want to buckle down and master at least one of my many creative interests. Problem is, I'm not sure which I want to commit to so completely! I mean, if I were to look long and hard at all the creative things I want to do, I would have to add baking, cooking, interior design, and writer to my list, just to name a few. I am starting to believe that when it comes to creative endeavors, I suffer from Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD.) Seriously, if I could clone myself, I probably would, just so one of me could sit back and watch all my others go to it on the creative front.

I've also noticed a pattern with my blogging; it seems to be directly tied to whatever my latest creative obsession is. That being said, I'm ready to announce the next artistic challenge. Ready? I want to write a novel. TA-DA! I have no doubt many of you saw that coming based on the title of this blog post alone. Or maybe you've been blessed [cursed?] with my ramblings of wanting to write for the last few months. Either way, it's that time. My writer personality has been tugging and pulling and screaming at my consciousness and finally, I must let her loose. The timing, of course, probably has a lot to do with it, since the National Novel Writing Month (aka NaNoWriMo) is just nine days away. I've tried this challenge before, to write fifty thousand words in 30 days, starting November 1st. In fact, I've tried the last two years and failed miserably. I blame my commitment issues. Well, that and the fact that it's so close to Christmas that all my other creative personalities (forthwith to be known as the others) start rearing their heads for time to do all their creative holiday endeavors. I think it's safe to say that at no other time of the year is my artistic MPD worse.

But this year feels like the year, you know? I've been preparing myself by starting a bullet journal late in September. It's quite retro, involving actual pen and paper for note taking. And so far, I love it. There's something so intimate about putting pen (or pencil) to paper. In fact, that's sort of become my new mantra. Writing in my bullet journal daily has stirred the writer in me, and as such I've found myself doing character and plot development for my novel. It's been a great exercise and is definitely getting me excited for November 1st. So yeah, I'm doing this. Or at least, I am going to try. (Damn commitment issues!)

And as my inner author takes center stage for the month of November, I will temper the others by allowing them an occasional opportunity to strut their stuff. In the meantime, lift your pens and pencils with me, find yourself some fine paper, and jot down a little note for someone you love. You'll feel so much better for it!

Here's to old school communication!

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The [Soap] Dish

2013-01-30T21:17:00.002-06:00

Over the last few weeks I've found a new passion. Yes, another one. I know, I know, I'm all over the place with my crafty, DIY stuff. But really, I can't help it. I love to create. I love to make things. And soap? Well, there's something very zen about taking fats, in the way of various skin loving oils like olive oil, avocado oil, shea and cocoa butters, adding in some drain cleaner (did you know that lye is in fact a drain cleaner? It's also used to make pretzels, canned mandarin oranges, hominy... I'm not kidding) and some awesome smelling essential oils, along with a myriad of other additives, and winding up with soap? Honest to goodness soap. Bubbly, creamy, cleansing (not drying, if you know what you're doing, and I'd like to think I do!), fabulous SOAP. I love it. To a degree, it's like baking for me, sans those destructive calories!

Yes, I am now making soap. I've made about 12 batches, totaling about 20 pounds of soap, in just over six weeks. All using what is called the cold process method. More on that later.

Today, I am making milled soap. Known also as rebatched soap. Essentially, it's a way of taking an existing soap and modifying it by melting it down and adding any assortment of things, such as rich and softening shea butter, or, as in my case, correcting a "mistake" and adding the scented essential oil I forgot to add when my niece, Heidi, and I made the soap. Soapmakers often use this method to repurpose "ugly" soaps, soaps that didn't quite turn out they way they'd envisioned. So yeah, that's another reason I'm rebatching the soap I lovingly call "Heidi-bean Bar." I don't want to toss the soap, since it's actually a great formulation, but I also wanted something more girly for my Heidi-bean. So this soap will be for my personal use once I've rebatched it and I will make her something fabulous for her use. Yeah, I know, I spoil the kid. And I love it!

Here we have the original soap, freshly poured into the molds. We tried to do a bit of a swirl, using red sandalwood powder to color part of the batch a deep purple and leaving the rest of the batch its "natural" color, then alternately pouring the two colors into the mold.

The soap came out of the molds beautifully, although our "swirl" and layering attempts were, well, blah. The purple color was fairly muted, and the coffee grinds we added for a bit of scrubby action (Heidi said she really liked how the "scrubbies" felt on her hands) made the two colors blend to the point of being almost indiscernable.

After four weeks of curing, the soaps developed the dreaded ash, which sometimes occurs on handmade soaps. Surprisingly, some people like the rustic look it gives soaps. Me, not so much.

Heck, if it weren't for the muted purple, the ash on these makes them almost completely blend into our granite countertops. Not attractive as far as I'm concerned. Certainly not cute enough for a 9 year old girl's bathroom!

The first step in rebatching is to shred or chunk the soap to facilitate melting it. I figured the finer I shred the soap the easier and smoother it would melt. Rebatching is known to produce very chunky, rustic (but not ashy!) soaps and I wanted to minimize that as much as possible.

Patiently shredding the soap by hand. So yeah, I'm making hand-milled soap! Sounds fancy, eh?

With the ashiness shredded away, you can see the colors a bit better, but the muted purple just wasn't doing it for me, at least not for my niece. She should have a bright, vivid purple, pink and black soap! This just won't do.

Once all the soap is shredded, I tossed it into a gallon sized zip lock and tossed in a bit of goat's milk. Goat's milk boosts lather and is great for those with eczema and psoriasis. In soap, goat's milk is loved for it's skin conditioning properties. Once in the bag, I put it in a pot of lightly boiling water and walked away to do a bit of Facebooking and soap formulating.

After about 45 minutes in the pot, the soap was melted and looking nice and goopy. I quickly added the Eucalyptus Spearmint essential oils and snipped a corner of the bag to "pipe" the fast cooling, quickly turning to goop soap batter into the mold.

Since I really liked the way the soap turned out of this mold the first time, I figured why not use it again? As quickly as I squeezed the batter into the mold, I wasn't quick enough. By the time I got to the last heart the batter had cooled so much it was pretty much set. I barely got it into the mold.

All in all, the process wasn't near as bad as I'd read it could be and while the soap backs won't have a perfectly smooth finish, they will smell awesome and have a lovely conditioning lather.

Not bad for a first time rebatch and an awesome way to save what would have otherwise been a very boring soap.

Here's to hand-milled, heart shaped soap!

Making the Break

2012-12-10T11:28:00.001-06:00

Today, I did something I NEVER thought I'd do again. Today, I used a BAR SOAP for my shower ::GASP::
I stopped using [commercial] bar soaps AGES ago, for the simple fact that they made my skin feel sticky, scratchy, tight, and dry. It was gross. I switched to lovely liquid shower gels, and eventually bar soap was nothing but a very bad memory.

Fast forward at least 20 years. I am now making my own bar soap. I can't stop thinking about bar soap. I am obsessed. Bar soap, bar shampoo, bar dog shampoo, bar shaving soaps. Every waking moment, and most of my sleeping moments, I am obsessing about soap!

As my first batch of soap has now cured for a full week, and while it feels like 5 weeks is still a lifetime away, I know that one day soon my bar soap will be ready for it's debut in my shower. And to be fair to it, I want to make sure that by then, I am not still harboring some of the terrible memories from my previous bar soap experiences. To this end, while shopping at the mall with my niece yesterday, I popped into L'Occitane to pick up one of their "famed" Shea Butter Milk Bars. And today, it made it's debut in my shower.

I was a little hesitant as I unwrapped it. I sniffed it, and then really inhaled the scent. It was delightful. I then put the soap in my hand and felt it's smoothness and firmness. The beauty of the bar was in it's simplicity. Once in the shower, I started lathering up the soap and was pleasantly surprised at the thick, rich lather. The soft scent filled the air and I could feel the soap doing it's thing, getting me squeaky clean without drying my skin out.

Once I was done, I immediately toweled off, noting that I wasn't soaking wet as I normally was with my usual shower gel. Not sure what happened there. I also noticed a tiny "drag" on my skin, but nothing that was unpleasant. Once I finished toweling off, I applied my usual tiny bit of home made body butter and immediately noticed the difference. The body butter absorbed nice and evenly and immediately left my skin feeling like absolute silk. I must admit, however, that I did miss my shower gel just a little, but my excitement for using my own, hand made soaps is such that I will continue using the milk bar as a point of reference until mine have cured. I know that with a bit of trial and error, I will be able to find a formula that is absolutely perfect for me, and that journey into the awesomeness that is soap making is what continues to drive my enthusiasm.

Here's to hand crafted soap [bars]!

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Buh Bye Tide!

2012-11-15T23:11:00.000-06:00

I have recently been on a do it yourself bender that started with lip balm (more on that in a near future post.) I blame Pinterest. And the Internet in general. I mean, think about it. You can find instructions on how to make a bomb via Google or Bing. How hard could making your own lip balm be? Or, in tonight's DIY adventure, laundry detergent? Yes, I went there. I made my own laundry detergent.

I have to say, there aren't near as many "recipes" for DIY laundry detergent as there are for other things, like facial scrubs, shampoo and yes, my favorite, lip balm! But the ones I did find were pretty basic, inexpensive, and chock full of stuff that I normally use in my wash anyway, so I figured, what the hell, let's do this.

I headed to my local Wally World with my ingredient list in hand. I practically ran to the laundry aisle, partly from the crazy excitement that inevitably possesses me when I have a new project on hand, and partly because I just love the smell of the laundry detergent aisle in pretty much any store, but especially at Wally World. I tossed the Borax, baking soda, super washing soda and softening crystals into my cart and scanned the aisle shelves for the laundry bar soap. My recipe, which I found via Pinterest over on How Does She's blog, called for Zote soap, but I'm big into scents, especially when it comes to my laundry detergent, so I wanted to smell the Zote and any other bar soap they had. I smelled the Zote soap, and it was okay - clean, fresh, light. There was the added bonus that they had a white version, (their original version being pink) and, even better, they had a box of the stuff that was already pre-chipped, sliced, slivered! That meant no grating. It also meant a slightly higher investment in your detergent and since I was wanted to see the least expensive way of accomplishing my task, I opted to skip on the pre-grated stuff.

Curious to smell some other soaps, I looked around for other options. My eyes finally landed on something called Fels-Naptha, which while I'd never heard of it, it had been listed as an alternative to Zote in several of the DIY formulas I'd researched. Some of the other choices for laundry bar soap were Dr. Bronner's and Kirk's Original Coco Castile, though I think these are more body soaps than they are laundry, and I was unable to find them at my local Wally World (but you can bet your butt I will be ordering Dr. Bronner's Eucalyptus for my upcoming DIY Body Wash adventure!)

With only the Fels-Naptha as an alternative to Zote, I grabbed a bar, held it up to my nose and inhaled deeply. WOW! My eyes flew wide open. This stuff was everything I wanted my clothes to smell like. Super clean, fresh, soapy and just a hint of perfume, but not overly feminine nor masculine. I was hooked. I put the bar in my cart, and added two more. The recipe only required two bars but I figured one more bar would help boost the scent, the washing power and certainly couldn't hurt.

With all my ingredients accounted for I beelined for the hardware section to get a five gallon pail with a lid. Found one easily enough for about $4. A bargain as the bucket and lid were very sturdy and absolutely perfect for my little experiment.

Ready to get the party started, I checked out, telling the cashier about my detergent making adventure while she scanned my goodies. She seemed interested but I suspect was really just being polite. I then drove home, unloaded my bounty and set everything up on the counter.

The players:
1 (4lb 12oz) box of Borax, found in the detergent aisle
1 (3lb 7oz) box of Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda, found in the detergent aisle
1 (3lb) tub of OxyClean, found in the detergent aisle. This item is optional but I've used with my regular detergent and it's an awesome booster.
2 (14.1 oz) bars of Fels-Naptha (or whatever laundry soap you prefer). Also found in the detergent aisle.
1 (4lb) box of Arm & Hammer Baking Soda. I suppose you might find this in the baking aisle, though mine was in the detergent aisle, right next to the Super Washing Soda.
And last but not least, 1 or 2 (depending on how soft and scented you want your laundry!) (55 oz) bottle(s) of Purex Crytals Fabric Softener, found in the detergent aisle. I got Lavendar Blossom for mine. Smells dreamy.
1 (5 gal) pail with a lid
1 long wooden spoon

Scene 1:
Grate your bar soap. I suggest using a good sized bowl to grate your soap into; a single bar yields a substantial amount of shavings. You can use a food processor or do it manually using a cheese grater. If you use a food processor, do one bar at a time, emptying the container between bars. My first go round, I used the larger grate but with the second bar of soap I went finer. I wound up with a 50/50 mix of thicker to fine soap shavings. I recommend going as fine as you can on the grate because the finer the shavings, the easier it will dissolve in your wash. And don't worry about the soap residue on your grater or food processing disc. This stuff isn't like wax as it dissolves very easily even in cold water, making clean up a snap.

Scene 2:
Dump your grated soap into your 5 gallon bucket.
Dump in the Borax; give it a stir with your wooden spoon.
Dump in the baking soda; stir it up
Dump in the super washing soda; stir some more
Take a break. Inhale deeply. SMILE.
Dump in your Purex fabric softening crystals; grab that wooden spoon, tap out a little tune on the side of the bucket, then stir
Dump in your Oxyclean and stir, stir, STIR

Scene 3:
I stirred 'til I didn't feel like stirring anymore. Then I popped the lid onto the bucket, made sure it was on there nice and tight, then tipped the bucket on it's side and started rolling it around the kitchen floor. No kidding. Way easier than stirring. Plus, all that super fine, yummy smelling powder was in the air from my having poured it into the bucket and was starting to give me a tiny headache (it smelled really good but it was also really strong!) so I was trying to minimize getting more of it into the air. This definitely did the trick. After about 3 minutes of mixing my detergent, I got the bucket right side up again, peeled off the lid and looked down at my awesome smelling detergent. I was thrilled! I then scooped about 2 gallons worth into a cute glass container I'd picked up at the store, tossed in my tablespoon sized scoop, capped it with the lid and triumphantly carried it to my laundry room. Not known for my patience, I ran into the bedroom, grabbed a bunch of denim out of the hamper and threw it in our HE (high efficiency) washer with 2 scoops of my newly made detergent (2 tablespoons of detergent is all you need for a load). Immediately the smell of clean started filling the air. Guess I'd soon find out how well this stuff works.

Some things I learned while researching my DIY detergent formula:

This is definitely HE washing machine safe
This detergent is not very sudsy; if you are expecting sudsy, you will be disappointed. Please do not let that be a deterrent Suds does not necessarily mean clean. Suds merely means sulfides. A lack of sulfides is a more natural product, easier on your skin and clothes, and definitely easier on your washing machine
I spent $28.16 for the detergent ingredients. I made enough detergent to do approximately 640 loads of laundry. That's five cents (yes, you read that right) per load of laundry, and 1.75 loads of laundry per day. For a year. It's okay, you can re-read that last sentence. Go ahead, I'll wait for ya'.

I had a blast making this and am excited to see how this stuff performs over the next few weeks. I will definitely do a follow up post after a few uses of the detergent. If you decide to try this for yourself but can't wait for my review, you can hit me up here or on my Facebook page, and I'll be happy to try and answer any questions you may have.

Final scene:

My washer just dinged. Clothes are done. Took a minute from writing this blog to get the jeans into the dryer. They smelled great coming out of the washer and upon inspection, appeared to be squeaky clean. First impression? This stuff is awesome, and for five cents a load? I'm hooked.

Here's to doing it yourself and doing it cheaper AND better!

30 Days of Thanks: Days 5-11

2012-11-11T18:00:00.002-06:00

As is my habit, I've started about four new projects this week, quickly casting aside any unfinished projects for the new ones. This is a testament to my inability to commit to any one project at any one time. I almost always go back to my unfinished stuff and eventually finish the project, but yeah, I'm easily distracted. Same can be said about my blog. I love to write, usually, but this week has been all about lip balm and knitting (I'll save the details for another post, another day). With soft supple lips, cozy blankets and trying to stay on top of writing a novel crowding my brain, this week's casualty was my 30 Days of Thanks blog series. Please know, failure to blog what I'm thankful for on any given day doesn't mean I didn't recognize what I was thankful for. As I mentioned at the start of the series, I have more to be thankful for than days I have left to count those things on. And for that, I am beyond grateful. I am blessed. But, as it is November and Thanksgiving Day is just around the corner, here's my list of things I'm thankful for for the last day days, listed in no particular order.

Day 5 - My cousins. They are my sisters, my best friends. I love them dearly and thank God daily for them.
Day 6 - A home filled with love and most days, peace. I am able to accept that sometimes these things get lost in the crazy of life, but I am deeply thankful that they have always returned.
Day 7 - Freedom of speech. This last week was election week and a week of enlightenment as friends and family touted their political convictions on the social media sphere. I may not always, or ever, agree with some of their opinions, but I respect that they care enough about our country to passionately defend their views.
Day 8 - Veterans. These are the folks who sacrifice everything defending our country and it's freedoms. There aren't enough words to thank these incredible individuals.
Day 9 - Technology. It makes it possible to have daily "face to face" conversations with my parents via a computer and the Internet.
Day 10 - God. Everything, and I mean everything, begins and ends with Him.
Day 11 - Warm, fuzzy boots. I don't mind being cold, so long as my toes are warm.

Here's to the big and little things!

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30 Days of Thanks: Day 4

2012-11-04T21:22:00.002-06:00

There is so much I am thankful for that these posts are actually a lot harder than you might think. How do I pick one thing? God has blessed my life so abundantly that there is always something to be grateful or thankful for. But blessings don't always seem blessings when first we receive them. And it is about that I will write about today.

I am thankful for the challenges God allows me to put before myself daily. They are often so much harder and sometimes more painful than I think I can bear, but inevitably they serve as a reminder that I am never alone, that I need not fear, and that, in Christ, I can do all things.

It was the broken road that led me to my husband. It is the hard and painful experiences that bring me closer to God. It is the hardships that make me appreciate the blessings. And for that, I am thankful, every day.

Here's to being the clay in the Potter's Hands!

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30 Days of Thanks: Day 3

2012-11-03T20:32:00.002-05:00

Today I am grateful for love. Not so much the feeling, as this can be fleeting. But love, as an action, is a true gift.

It is often what motivates me to keep fighting in the face of adversity. Love of knowledge pushes me to keep learning. The love of family drives me to become a better person. The love of friends teaches me selflessness. My husband's love strengthens me. And the love of a forgiving and gracious God humbles me and reminds me that, when love is an action, it is ever-growing, ever-changing and always, absolutely always, is worth fighting for.

Here's to loving life, on life's terms!

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30 Days of Thanks: Days 1 and 2

2012-11-02T12:57:00.001-05:00

This year it seems the big thing on the social networking sites is to note, daily and for the month of November, what one is thankful for. I love this idea! Granted, I have things to be grateful and thankful for every day of the year, but taking a month to share some of these things with friends, to declare to my tiny universe what I is meaningful to me, well, what's not to love?

Without further ado...

Day 1 - My Family
I am always grateful for my family - but as I get a little older, I have come to appreciate them in ways I never thought possible. My mom's strength and patience. My dad's unconditional love. My brother's support. My husband's love and ability to make me laugh. All of my in-laws, for accepting me as a part of their own family. When it comes right down to it, no matter how amazing my life is, or isn't, it is my family that I want to share the good and bad times with.

Day 2 - The Insanity of not One, but TWO jobs
In an economy when people are being forced to make career changes they wouldn't otherwise make, or are having a hard time finding work in the first place, I am deeply grateful that I have two jobs. Though I often complain about all the work I have, I am actually grateful that I have this to complain about, for I know the alternative would be much worse.

I've learned not to take God's gifts for granted, and even more importantly, to understand that everything that comes from God is a gift, though it may not always feel that way. Being overworked has been good for me, so long as I remember to balance it with a dose of quiet time for Him, for me, and for my small family.

Here's to an awesome Thanksgiving month!

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The Yoga Challenge - Day 1

2012-10-29T18:59:00.001-05:00

I suck at committing to exercising. Frankly, it's because I hate to sweat. And let's be honest, I'm a bit lazy. I work crazy hours all the time and when I'm done working, all I really want to do is veg in front of the TV or read a book. So yeah, exercise? Despite how desperately I need it, it's not at the top of my priority list. Lately however, my stress levels have been hitting all time highs, and it's starting to take a noticeable toll on my body. My neck and shoulder muscles are so tight I can barely move. Even in my sleep, I'm tense. I bite down so hard when I sleep I can barely open my mouth when I awaken. The pillow winds up jammed against the headboard as my shoulders tense and shoot up around my ears. My breathing is crazy shallow and I know my body is in serious need of some oxygen and oxygen rich blood. I tried massage and seeing a chiropractor. While both helped, they provided minimal relief and the reprieve was fleeting. I knew the time for finding a long term solution to my high stress levels and the resulting physical tension was fast approaching.

I'd long and oft heard the benefits of yoga, specifically Bikram yoga, a yoga that is practiced in a room that is heated to a mild 105 degrees Fahrenheit. I knew that this was an exercise that would likely relieve most of my physical symptoms, and very likely, would help me learn to manage the mental stress as well. Knowing this, however, and actually getting myself to a class, as anyone who knows me will tell you, are two things that are completely worlds apart. After much contemplation, and telling myself I was going to at least try a class and check out what it was all about, I finally tucked my lovely new squishy yoga mat and towel under my arm and dragged myself to class. All the way there, I thought to myself, "Are you nuts?? It's gonna be so HOT! You're not going to be able to breathe, much less move! And you're gonna be so sweaty and gross!! Turn around. Go home! You don't really want to do this!!" This inner monologue lasted right up until I walked to the front door of the yoga studio.

Upon entering the studio, I was greeted by two incredibly friendly women who gave me some basic info and instructions for surviving my first practice. I nodded and grinned stupidly at their messages, as I could already feel the dry heat emanating from the hot yoga room. I slowly made my way back to the dressing rooms, put my stuff away, took a long pull on my water bottle, and walked curiously into the yoga room.

First thoughts? Man, it was HOT! Luckily, I'd just come in from outside where it was somewhat chilly, so for the first few minutes, the dry heat actually felt quite nice. I found a not too crowded spot on the floor to lay out my mat and proceeded to quietly lie in the dim room and collect my thoughts. I tried to focus on breathing deeply and acclimating to the heat. After about 5 minutes, I could feel the heat really start to penetrate my muscles, my breathing became deeper and I actually started to relax a little. Once the practice started, I surprised myself by being able to do many of the poses and actually hold them for the necessary length of time. I definitely had to remind myself to breathe several times, but overall, the beginning of the class was not near as bad as I'd expected.

Half way through the class, we switched from standing poses, or asanas, to floor poses. It was at about that time that the heat hit me, and not in a good way. The combination of heat, deep breathing, and somewhat aerobic first half of the practice had me feeling short of breath and light headed. I know most of that was just a testament to how out of shape I am, but I also knew enough to take the second half of the class a little easier. I tried many of the poses, but the heater air was getting harder to breathe, feeling heavier and thicker which each breath. I started wondering how much longer the class would last, and at one point, the desire to walk out of the class to get some fresh air was overwhelming. Thankfully, I successfully talked myself back from the ledge and finished the class. I still tried each of the poses toward the end of class, however the attempts were much less concentrated than those in the first half of the class, as at this point it was taking all I head just to keep breathing and not pass out.

Finally, the instructor said the magic word that released me from what felt like hell. "Namaste!"

I slowly stood up and collected my now soaked towel and mat. I carefully walked to the door, feeling light headed and a bit dizzy. Then the door opened and what felt like an icy blast hit my whole, sweaty body. I suddenly felt wide awake and ridiculously elated! I'd done it. I'd managed to stay in the hot room for the whole class!

As I headed home, a sense of bliss enveloped me. I felt good. My body felt good. My head was clear. I could breathe! When I arrived home, my husband asked if I'd managed to stay in the hot room the full time. When I replied, triumphantly, that I had, he got up to give me a hug, and as his arms wrapped around me, I felt myself overwhelmed with a crazy assortment of emotions. I didn't know if I should laugh or cry, so a weird blend of both came tumbling out of me. I thought surely I'd fried my brain in that crazy heat, but then I remembered having read something about high emotions being released during or after a practice. I chalked up the emotional overload to my first yoga class.

In the twenty four hours since my first class, here are the observations I've made:

I slept long and hard, and it was a very deep, dreamless, very restful sleep
I feel more energized - I am able to focus my mind more easily
I am breathing deeper in a resting state
My appetite is wildly under control; I've not been binge snacking and portions are very small
I can't seem to drink enough water
I am not as worried about things outside of my control
I am insanely excited about my next yoga class!

I must go get ready for my next class! But I will keep you posted on my progress and observations, so please come back soon!

Here's to relaxing!

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Another Hunger Games [movie] Review

2012-03-28T23:56:00.002-05:00

Last year I read Suzanne Collins' Hunger Games trilogy. Devoured it, really, in something like three days. Was ecstatic when I heard the movie would be out this year. Avoided the opening weekend crowds and finally went to see the much anticipated movie, based on the first book, on Tuesday evening.

No doubt several gazillion reviews have already been posted. Most of them probably by people much more qualified than I. Nonetheless, here's my two cent review of the movie. Those of you who've not read the book or seen the movie, be warned; this review may or may not contain some spoilers.

I should preface my review by saying that in preparation for the movie, I re-read the trilogy. In about three days time. Three days prior to seeing the movie, to be specific. Thus, by the time I got to the movie theater, not only was the first book fresh on my mind, but so was the entire story, thereby giving me probably more information than I really needed for the viewing of the first movie, The Hunger Games. That being said, here are my observations, thoughts, and feelings about the movie.

Cinematography
Prior to seeing the movie I read an article that indicated the editing of the Hunger Games was very choppy, leaving the viewer feeling a bit disjointed. I concur wholeheartedly with the article's author. The editing was extremely fast paced, leaving you with some sense of urgency but without motivation for the urgency. The killing scenes were cut extremely short and reduced to considerably less than the horrific scenes they were in the book. I recognize this was likely done to reduce the maturity rating on the movie, as well as to spare the viewer the agony and horror of watching children being butchered to death by other children. And for that, I am grateful. Nonetheless, the overall editing seemed to also cut short the development of various characters and relationships, thereby leaving me wanting. I suspect that as a result of the editing and lack of character development, thee were times when the movie felt slow, almost boring, tedious even. Which is at complete odds with the book as there was never a feeling of slowness. Even the historical references kept up with the pace and rhythm of the book. The movie, not so much.

Story Adaptation
The screenwriters definitely did a noteworthy job of translating Collins' work to the silver screen. While some scenes I loved from the book were left out, the story held together nicely without them. Viewers who hadn't read the book were probably able to follow along without issue, and I would suspect many of them are now putting the book on their to-do lists.

Casting
Katniss Everdeen -- Jennifer Lawrence
I must admit, when I first saw the cast for The Hunger Games, I was disappointed. I was hoping to see Dakota Fanning cast as Katniss, but them I am biased as I think Ms. Fanning is incredibly talented. However, Jennifer Lawrence certainly held her own as the rebellion invoking Katniss Everdeen. Her acting was polished, though there were a few things that bugged me. I suspect these pertained more to character development than Ms. Lawrence's performance.

In my imagination, Katniss was very rough around the edges and conflicted, even before she entered the Arena. With Lawrence's portrayal, I had a difficult time seeing her as rough in any capacity. She came across as polished and collected throughout the entire movie. Even the scene where she is being transported via the tube to the Arena, you barely notice her distress or fear. Instead, you are given this nearly blank stare that doesn't begin to convey what Collins' describes is happening to Katniss at that time. I will counter that in all fairness, the author was able to describe Katniss' thoughts during that time and one thing that remains consistent throughout the book is that Katniss was determined never to let her fear show, while in the movie we only have her facial expressions and body language to tell us what might be going through her mind. Still, I never got the impression she was fighting to hide her fear, but rather was unsure of how to convey any feelings at any given time. Again, I chalk this up more to character development than I do Ms. Lawrence's acting abilities.

Peeta Mellark -- Josh Hutcherson
Ok, seriously? Mr. Hutcherson is an attractive young man and all, but Peeta Mellark he is not. At no point in the movie do I ever connect with him as the "boy with the bread." Unfortunately, as I cannot think of who I would rather see in this role, I'll leave this one alone. Suffice it to say that I was completely dissatisfied with this man's performance. Or maybe, as with Katniss, my disappointment is more with character development.

Gale Hawthorne -- Liam Hemsworth
While Mr. Hemsworth was certainly more suited to play Gale than Mr. Hutcherson was to play Peeta, I was still not thrilled with this performance. Hemsworth, though he had little screen time and his role was minimal in this first movie, failed to portray any of the passion of Gale, whether it be his feelings for Katniss, at which the first book only hints of, or his deep dislike of the Capitol, for which you get a better sense of in the book. Regardless, the performance felt shallow. Or maybe it was just the character development. Again.

Do you see a theme emerging here?
Perhaps I should skip the casting and move right on to Character Development. Yes? No. Not just yet.

President Snow -- Donald Sutherland
I think Mr. Sutherland will likely develop into a great President Snow. His role in this first movie was insufficient for me to truly gauge how I feel about him as Snow. Particularly since I read all three books just days prior to seeing the movie [finished the third book the night before]. And I really do think that for some reason the freshness of the entire trilogy is skewing my perception of some of these performances. So I'll leave this one alone. For now. But know this: I have VERY HIGH expectations of Mr. Sutherland. Particularly for the movie(s) covering the third book, Mockingjay.

Effie Trinket -- Elizabeth Banks
Having never been a fan of Elizabeth Banks, I think she played Effie Trinket to near perfection. She was appropriately annoying and correspondingly self indulgent. More concerned about the niceties and the Tributes' manners, she was a fairly decent depiction of what I expected for someone from the Capitol. My biggest beef here was that in my head, Effie Trinket was somewhat heavyset. I think I'd have liked Ms Banks' performance better if she'd put on a few pounds for the role. But hey, that's just me. And what do I know?

Haymitch Abernathy -- Woody Harrelson
Hm. This one is tough. Mostly because I know that my feelings regarding this role are about character development. Assuming Mr. Harrelson was directed to deliver the Haymitch we got in The Hunger Games, I can not hold him at fault. If, however, this was his interpretation of the drunk, bullish mentor, then I am highly disappointed. Since I have no way of knowing which it is, director or interpretor, I will air my grievances in the Character Development section.

There were other characters but none I feel were fleshed out enough for me to truly comment on their performance. I recognize that the film would likely need to be twice as long to viably do the book justice, so I'll stick to the aforementioned performances and move on. Take that as a hint however, Hollywood: if the book is such that it warrants two movies, then give us two movies. Twilight did it. Harry Potter did it. I think The Hunger Games should probably do it. Just my two cents.

Character Development
All right. Let's get down to the nitty gritty, shall we? Character development was a bit of a mess, in my humble opinion. I never felt any chemistry with Katniss and Peeta. Nor with Katniss and Gale, for that matter. The conflicted Katniss never truly emerged. In the book, Peeta won my heart,and I was torn for Katniss, who would at some point have to choose between her best friend, Gale, and the "boy with the bread", Peeta. The movie, however, failed completely to conjure up my compassion for Katniss, as I never sensed her feelings for either boy. Her need to save Peeta was not the result of her internal struggle, her fear of returning to District 12 without him and winding up hated by all. Rather it felt like she was merely wanting to save him because it was the right thing to do. Her hatred of Peeta when she sees him with the Career Tributes failed to take form as well, and that left me feeling unsure of her motives for anything to do with Peeta.

Haymitch, in the book, comes across as bullish, uncaring, selfish, and a complete alcoholic. Totally unlikeable. Not so in the movie. This Haymitch was concerned, helpful, and almost felt like he was trying to be Katniss' new BFF. It will be interesting to see how this character develops in upcoming movies.

Peeta, who professes his love for Katniss during the Tribute Interviews before the Games begin, was completely unconvincing. The charisma so clearly depicted in the book never came across the screen and I found myself barely tolerating him. A complete one-eighty from how I felt for him in the book.

The tracker jacker hallucination scene, when Katniss is yelling at her mom. For viewers who'd not read the book, I'm sure this scene was lost on them. It felt out of place and totally unnecessary.

And finally, Panem's Capital and it's citizens. Collins' vivid descriptions of the people that inhabited the Capitol left me with a mental image of a place so surreal, filled with self-important, self-centered, self-indulgent people whose only purpose in life is to be fashionable and party. These narcissists implanted gems on their bodies, tattooed their faces and surgically altered themselves in extreme ways for fashion, and dressed so outrageously that surely it befit the phrase for which Panem was named, 'Panem et Circenses', a Latin phrase meaning "Bread and Circuses." Hoarding was fashionable, gorging oneself and them regurgitating it all to make room for more gorging, and worst of all, viewing The Hunger Games as pure entertainment, rather than for the brutal punishment it was. This is what made people citizens of Panem.

The movie however, doesn't show you the rainbow hued buildings, or the outlandish fashion customs of the locals. Instead we are only given brief glimpses of a city of gleaming silver, and citizens covered in obnoxious colored costumes and positively garish makeup. These people looked less like the Panem citizens of Collins' book, and more as if they were trying to bring back punk rock in the 80s. I think this was a major fail point for me, however inconsequential to the story line it was, because I feel that with today's technology, Hollywood could have really brought Panem to life on the screen. Instead, what we got felt like a half hearted attempt to bring back Willy Wonka and his Chocolate Factory, minus all the colors and the Oompa Loompas.

Overall
Though from my breakdown you might think I completely disliked the movie, you'd be wrong. I actually enjoyed the move overall. It took separating it as much as possible from the wonderful book I'd just finished reading, and approaching the movie as it's own entity, independent from the book. Once I was able to do that, the movie was somewhat entertaining and it was interesting to see the director's interpretation of such a highly popular novel. While I enjoyed the movie, and am looking forward to seeing the sequels that correspond to the other books in the trilogy, I can't say this is one I'd watch again. At least not any time soon.

And that, dear friends and welcome strangers, concludes my review of The Hunger Games [movie]. Please note that these are just my opinions, and they don't mean much to anyone but me, however I certainly appreciate you stopping in to visit. Feel free to leave a comment with your impression of the Hunger Games, and be sure to include if you've read the book.

Here's to seeing our beloved books on the big screen!

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Valentine's Day Twist

2012-02-14T18:34:00.000-06:00

Here we are, another Valentine's Day coming to a close. Single people rejoice, couples either loved it and showered one another with gifts or were indifferent to the oft called "Hallmark" holiday. This is one of those holidays that people love to hate, or they just plain love.

Here's my two cents on it. Like any other holiday, be it Mother's Day, Thanksgiving or even Christmas, Valentine's is just a day set apart to give us another opportunity to let the ones we love know that we love them. In the busyness of every day life, we often overlook the little things that let our partners know how incredibly special they really are, and how much they mean to us. It doesn't have to be about lavishing gifts on one another. In fact, it shouldn't be about that. This is a chance to show your love and appreciation and more oft than not, it's acts of service and kindness that get this message across best. Think about it. At Christmas, what is the thing that makes you and those around you feel the Spirit of Christmas? Is it really the buying and giving of material goods, or is it instead the sharing of time with one another, or reaching out to the less fortunate, giving, without being asked, of yourself?

It is this girl's humble opinion that we are the ones that have turned Valentine's Day into the commercial hot mess it's become. Don't get me wrong, I love getting flowers as much as the next girl, but honestly, I'd sooner have my husband do something unexpected, like cook dinner with me, or surprise me with a picnic in the park (weather permitting, of course). And here's the thing. These acts of kindness, of service, well, they shouldn't be confined to just this one day. Just as we wish each other "the Spirit of Christmas all through the year" so should we take every chance we have to show our loved ones how much they mean to us on a daily basis.

Consider this: If each of us woke up every morning and asked ourselves "What can I do today to make my partner's life a little easier today? What can I do to make him/her feel special and loved today?" wouldn't our relationships and marriages be stronger, have a better chance at survival in a society that is bombarding us with a message of "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR ME LATELY?"

For those that celebrated today, I hope you had a wonderful day filled with love. For you Anti-Valentine's Day folk, I hope it was an awesome Tuesday. And for everyone, I pray a year filled with small tokens of love daily, those things that you look back on and can't help but smile because you are reminded that that special someone gets you. (Stole the "gets you" from my good friend Monica. Hope you don't mind, Mon!)

Here's to the spirit of Love, every day all year long!

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Family and a Funeral

2012-01-14T17:44:00.000-06:00

Late last week my uncle Manuel passed away. He was the beloved husband of my aunt Martha, one of my mom's younger sisters. Devastated for my aunt and cousins, my husband and I flew to Chicago to lend some comfort and support during what had to be a terrible time for them. We were joined in Chicago by three of my cousins, the daughters of another of my mom's sisters. These precious cousins of mine, whom I lovingly refer to as the Sisters Trevi, knew first hand what my Chicago cousins were feeling, as they had lost their mom to cancer in early 2008. Like a warm, soft blanket on a chilly day, we enveloped our Chicago family and poured out our love and prayers on them.

As is the norm when family gathers, the stories of times long past began. My grieving aunt put her own pain aside to share with us stories of her sisters, our moms and aunts, that we'd never heard, and that, for me at least, gave me a whole new, deep respect and awe for the incredible woman I call mom. She told us of how she fell in love and married Manuel. Of not knowing how to cook or iron men's pants when newly married and having to be taught these things by our uncle. She spoke of a time when family meant everything. We laughed, we cried, we laughed some more. We perused old photos, admiring the fashion styles and big beehive hair our moms and aunt sported. We got to know my uncle in a way we didn't know him in life. We laughed, we cried, we laughed some more.

Family and friends came and went over the next few days, some unable to stay for the wake and funeral, others able to stay only long enough to pay their final respects. Each person brought with them a sense of comfort for my aunt and cousins, and I know the family was grateful for them all.

My uncle was buried on a beautifully sunny, unseasonably warm day. God blessed him on the day we said goodbye as much as He'd blessed him all his life. And as my aunt placed white roses on his marker, the family stood strongly around her, and her sisters stood on either side of her, a hand on her arm. These sisters, my mom and aunt, share a bond forged by love stronger than anything I've known. They are pillars of strength, bound together with an enduring love and respect for one another. I see much of who they are in all of their children, and I am grateful to call them all my family.

It is heartbreaking that there comes a time in our lives when the only time we reach out to one another is during times of hardship. Family are those we should surround ourselves with during the good times, as well as the bad. We should make an effort to see one another, not just at weddings and funerals, but whenever God blesses us with a chance to do so. After all, we are very much our families, as our families are us.

My uncle, may he rest in peace, lived a BIG life. He touched many lives and instilled in his own family a moral code and work ethic that is hard to find these days. He loved my aunt passionately, gently, without reservation. He gave the gift of life, donating his liver that another might have a new chance at life. He committed himself to his family and community, and left each for the better. He will be missed. But we all will find comfort in the knowledge that he will live on in the love, talents, and goodwill of his wife, children, and grandchildren.

Funerals are a time of deep sorrow and personal reflection. But this particular funeral, for me, has been a reminder that life is short. A reminder to hold fast to those I love, and to cherish every moment I share with them. I really must remember to tell them how much I love them, and to do it way more often than I have before.

Here's to the ones we love!

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Monet

2011-02-14T20:57:00.002-06:00

Monet built a garden. He created it as a place of inspiration for his paintings. It is said he spent his whole life trying to capture, in paint, the light in his garden, particularly as reflected in the pond, amidst the water lilies.

I get this. Behind my house there is a cemetery. And in this cemetery there is a tree. I think of it as my tree. In winter, this tree stands naked, but beautiful. Mostly, I think, because of the way light gets caught in it's branches. I am captivated by this light, this tree. It is a gift and, like Monet, I am fascinated with capturing the light as it evolves in the branches of this tree.

Tonight's work? Pure joy. Each of these was shot through the lens of my iPhone 4's Hipstamatic.

I expect this endeavor will continue, for the light, it is ethereal and everchanging. And I am lost to it.

Here's to Monet and his inspiration!

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Microblog

2011-02-13T19:16:00.000-06:00

At the start of this month I launched a new blog. Be not dismayed, it's mostly a microblog. Meaning mini posts. Mostly photos from my iPhone. Occasionally a quote. Primarily, it's a way of communicating without being verbose. A way of documenting the little details of daily life that are often better said with a beautiful image. Or not so beautiful. Guess that depends on the beholder, eh?

Anyway, I find I often don't have a lot to say, but much to express and this new microblog is just that, a way of saying a lot, with few words.

Come drop us a visit, won't you? Sideway Glance. Where the view is usually askew.

Here's to less words!

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Update

2011-02-09T19:59:00.000-06:00

So yeah, it's been a nutty year so far. Busy doesn't really describe it, at least not adequately. But I figured I should at least do a quick update. Ready?

New York was a blast!
Went to Super Bowl XLV and watched the Green Bay Packers (my husband's favorite team for life, and mine for at least the last 4) win the Championship
Started a new microblog: Sideway Glance over on tumblr
Helped my husband launch a new company, Floors Elite
Signed up for my first 5K race of this year (and likely the first one in almost a year!)
Am learning to program, in JRuby

Here's to making time for the little things!

Reconciliation

2011-01-27T22:22:00.000-06:00

Last spring I broke up with NYC. I was frustrated and tired and ready to come home.
I didn't know what I was saying when I angrily spouted off that we were "done."

This weekend, I'm making up with my beloved concrete island.
Oh, it'll be a "quickie" for sure, but make no mistake, it will reflect a deep, long-standing love, one that can withstand all the craziness that often comes after a hot day (or four) in the city.

So bring on the snow, the sleet, the ice, the freezing winds. As far as I'm concerned, the weather is merely another in a series of beautiful backdrops for what will inevitably be a magical time.

Here's to a frosty Big Apple!

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Date with the Pavement

2011-01-11T21:54:00.000-06:00

Strapped on my sneakers today. Bundled up, fired up my 'Dance Central' playlist, leashed the dog, and hit the pavement. Braced myself for a disappointing run, since I hadn't run since late November. Surprised myself. A good day. A great run.

Here's to hitting the pavement, again!

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All Caught Up

2011-01-10T18:39:00.000-06:00

After a flurry of posts, I'm all caught up. Today's image:

Warmth
Cold days like today mandate a cozy place to work.

Here's to an updated blog!

January 9

2011-01-10T18:27:00.004-06:00

More Coffee, Please
Seriously considering a study on cream hitting coffee. Fascinating to me.
Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

Here's to creamy swirls in my java and having my camera on hand!

January 8

2011-01-10T18:19:00.002-06:00

The Boy
Rockin' the Oakleys.
Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

The Cat
Our chatterbox cat, Chloë, relaxing on the bed. She's rarely still, so shots of her are usually a bit blurred.
Camera: iPhone 4

The Tree
Sunset before the year's first snow.
Camera: iPhone 4

Here's to the 365 Project!

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Sheldon and Girls' Night Out

2011-01-10T17:46:00.000-06:00

First Friday of the year and I was spending it with girlfriends, doing a little Valentine's Day shopping.

Control Panel
I'd just gotten my car, Sheldon, back from the shop and was enjoying the traffic riddled ride into the city. Being in stand still traffic allowed me the time to quickly snap this shot.
Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

Sunset
It was a gorgeous night with surreal light in the sky. As I headed into the city, I was able to catch the sun hitting the buildings, turning them golden. The image doesn't begin to do it justice.
Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

Side Mirror
Even more amazing light was being caught in the side mirrors of my car.
Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

My friend wanted to get some cologne for her new boyfriend for their first Valentine's Day together so we hit the mall and put our noses to work. It's one thing to to smell a cologne out of the bottle, but a whole other thing to actually smell it on a man.

Scent Model
This guy was kind enough to allow us to spray and sniff. Sounds considerably more obscene than it really was.
Camera: iPhone 4

With a fragrance selected, we head off to our favorite department - SHOES!

Sky High
These Louboutins looked fantastic on my friend!
Camera: iPhone 4

And finally, after all that shopping, we settled down for some much needed libations and hilarious girl talk.

Cocktail
This drink, known as a Skwiss, (I think that was the name of it!) was positively delectable.
Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

January 6

2011-01-10T17:18:00.000-06:00

The 4th and 5th yielded no photos, but I was happy snapping again on the 6th.

Vin Rouge
A much needed, long awaited glass of cabernet.

Camera: iPhone 4, Hipstamatic

Here's to relaxing with a red!

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January 3

2011-01-10T17:14:00.000-06:00

Princess
The real princess in our house is our Brindle Boxer, Bristol. Most days after work, I come home to find her laid out on our bed, nestled among the throw pillows.

Camera: iPhone 4

Here's to my princess pup!

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January 2

2011-01-10T17:06:00.001-06:00

Sadly, I took no photos on January 2.
[Sigh]

Here's to these posts being few and far between, if at all.

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