Eccentric sophie

I've moved to printingdaisies.blogspot.com :)

2014-02-12T18:11:00.003+08:00

cheers

2013-11-07T03:20:00.001+08:00

Thank you for being by my side but time always have ways to end things. It's probably time to let go. Cheers for a better future.

“I have learned that if you are down, stay down. Don’t get back on your fucking feet until you are prepared to stand. Don’t get up until you have learned why you fell. Nine times out of ten, it is because you were weighing down on someone who could no longer hold you. You gave someone your power. You forgot about yourself. Let me tell you something - there is one person there for you. One person. It’s the same person that wipes your shit and feeds you and cleans up your vomit after a drunken night. It’s the same person who brushes your teeth and tends to your wounds and gets your crying ass out of the shower. The same one that tucks you into bed and cradles you in the night and fights off the darkness and embraces the light. It’s you. It’s always been you. Don’t get off that fucking ground because you see somebody you know or somebody you want to know, or - somebody you can rely on. Wipe your fucking face and get up for you. Because you can. Because it’s the least of what you owe yourself.”

2013-11-01T23:08:00.001+08:00

Its almost october

2013-09-27T02:40:00.000+08:00

Hey folks! How's everyone?? Sorry for the lack of updates. (Something I always say when I blog) I hope you guys still read this boring space.

I just realized my life style has changed quite a bit as I age. Used to really hate clubbing but here I am, going to clubs. Which is really funny coming to think of it. I still hate going to clubs but there's this really weirdly nice vibes pulling me in. Its like a love-hate relationship... I don't know. And as I age, I get lazier and lazier. Used to really love the morning sun and waking up early. Have no idea why but now I find myself in bed even at 3pm. Used to have a lot of hobbies too. I really loved taking pictures. Used to be so into photography. I'd rave about how good the 50mm lens are and how the bokehs would show in the details. Just thinking of all these things makes me really sad. Its part of growing which I do understand but there's always a part of me which wants to go back. The life I'm living right now is oddly boring, given the freedom I've been granted. It doesn't make life much more interesting that how it was. It just makes me develop more bad habits which are really hard to get rid of once they've settled in. And I have so much free time on my hands now since I'm not schooling at the moment. Never have I expected to see myself in this stage where I have to drop out of school and try to get my hands on something to do. Which I guess I have nobody but to blame but myself. All I can say is that I'm a slave to influences; good or bad. My will is so weak even though I'm a very determined person. But I guess that's life, just gotta strive harder. Gonna take it as a lesson learnt! As they always say, once bitten twice shy.

Just a few updates!
I've been given a few options for my future.
1. Go to Kaplan and pursue a diploma in Mass communications.
2. Go to the states to pursue a degree in Arts.

This is the hardest decision I have to make in my entire life. I wouldn't mind going to Kaplan but there will always be this "parent barrier".... My mom thinks that Kaplan isn't really established which leaves me with option 2. The states is so far away. And.... I have to make new friends. Probably will take me very long to settle down to the new environment and I probably have to speak like a blonde. :-( And it will take me a whole lot of courage to leave everyone I love behind. But I get to start anew... Hmmm. This shit is so nerve wrecking.............. On the side note, life has been pretty much ok nowadays.

And if you guys have any questions!
http://ask.fm/printingxdaisies :-)

2013-08-05T04:09:00.002+08:00

Forget about witch craft and potions. What is broken will always remain broken. What's dead will not come back to life. Sometimes, we just have to accept it whether we like it or not. I figured that if you wanted to be saved, you would've held onto my hands but you didn't so I'm letting you drown. And in that moment, what's left of you turned into dust and became memories. It's okay for I will hold onto them, forever and always in the depths of my heart.

People come and go in our lives. They walk in and deliberately leave something behind. Sometimes a bomb and sometimes a gift. You can't choose who to meet in life. It's all up to fate and that's the shitty part of life where you can't pick. Sometimes if you're lucky, the good people never leaves. Where as when you aren't so lucky, the not so good ones usually leave a scar and they walk out of your life; expecting you to fix yourself. But don't worry, bad times don't last. Once the storm is over, the tides will not be as rocky and the ship will be able to embark on a smooth sailing journey. Just gotta have faith and I will.

news

2013-07-31T14:03:00.001+08:00

Some updates about my life lately. Have been doing some soul searching and realized I haven't been very serious about keeping my life on track. I have some news for you guys. And that is, I've left NAFA. Its sad that I'm letting my only talent go to waste but I guess if I really like arts, I would still be pursuing it in the future. But, I'm applying for KAPLAN for mass communications and I really hope everything turns out well. I can't let my parents down anymore. Time after time, they've been terribly supportive about what I'm doing in life. But being a rebellious and stubborn daughter, I often turn my back on them. And that is not something I can afford to do this time round. For now, I'm just idling.. Getting used to the carefree life. No worries, no nothing. But somehow, this feeling worries me. Ironic isn't it..? Having nothing to worry about is actually worrying.

take me home

2013-07-22T18:58:00.000+08:00

new start, new beginning.

its only love

2013-07-12T03:21:00.002+08:00

Fave song at the moment.

There's one way out and no way in

Back to the beginning

There's one way back to home again

To where I feel forgiven

What is this I feel?

Why is it so real?

What am I to say?

It's only love, it's only pain

It's only fear that runs through my veins

It's all the things you can't explain

That make us human I am just an image of

Something so much greater I am just a picture frame

I am not the painter

Where do I begin? Can I shed this skin?

What is this I feel within?

It's only love, it's only pain

It's only fear that runs through my veins

It's all the things you can't explain

That make us human, that make us human

That make us human

It's only love, it's only pain

It's only fear that runs through my veins

It's all the things you can't explain

That make us human, that make us human

That make us human, oh, that make us human

Hmmm

2013-06-17T21:17:00.000+08:00

Life sucks.

2013-05-26T00:57:00.000+08:00

Gonna constantly remind myself that this is just gonna be a phase in my life where I get emotionally attached and unstable. A few years later, I'm gonna look back and sigh in relief cos dog days are over... But for now, I'm gonna keep myself going. Cos nobody likes deranged, nobody likes crazy. I should start getting back onto my feet and do what is best for me. No longer gonna sacrifice shit for people that are not worth my efforts. Gonna have a firm stand on what I want cos right now, my happiness is all that matters. I will keep what makes me happy around and chase away all that negativity that's driving me insane. I'm not gonna let myself turn into someone weak and someone I would abhor. Nope. Not any chance.

I've been really down lately. These few months took quite a toll on me cos all these that I am experiencing were like never before. It's like stepping out of my comfort zone and staying out for far too long for me to handle. I've been wearing and tearing too much. I've lost control of all my emotions. I don't remember myself like that. But it doesn't matter anymore. I hope I can finally say I've really woken up this time round. Don't want to be stucked in this routine where I feel like shit everyday. Not everything's going to go my way, this, I have to accept. It's either I break or I stay as a whole. Gonna drill this into my head, nothing is forever. I need to stop being so stubborn. I need to be more sensible. I need to get my shit together. If I want life to get better, I would've to do something about it.

This is all a part of growing up, I'm growing up. I will grow to become someone wonderful and someone my loved ones would be proud of. Even how bad life seems to be right now, I will occasionally take a moment and thank god that I'm blessed with Angels around me and pretty contradicting, for all the bad I've been through cos they're not gonna break me but instead they're gonna make me stronger.

I was a fool for love

2013-05-22T23:00:00.000+08:00

I stucked around, I did behave, I saved you everytime.

not broken just bent

2013-05-12T22:49:00.001+08:00

Hello guys! So I decided that I should start blogging again... Cos this place has been rather empty and sad lately. Well... 2 more days to my birthday. I guess I should start feeling a little happier as I'm finally gonna be legal. :-) And I'm not gonna let anything or anyone stand in my way. For the past few months, I've learnt a lot. More than I thought I would've went through. So I'm just gonna take my birthday as a new stepping stone, its gonna be a new start; to be someone better. They say, a girl changes when she reaches the age of 18... I HOPE THAT'S TRUE. Cos the life I'm leading right now is clearly really fucking stagnant. I should really learn to improve myself as a person, be it for others or for myself. There should be changes made for my studies and as well as all the other aspects.

And did I mention, I lost my wallet? Like what the fuck, I need to stop being so careless. I need to be less oblivious with my surroundings. Ugh lost my IC twice and now I have to pay $300 and wait for 3 months... Wtf..... SIGH whatever ain't gonna cry over spilt milk. What's done is done. IT SHALL BE A LESSON LEARNT. Should always always zip my bag so things won't fall out T_T

Some pictures from WAY BACCCCCKKKK!!! From Feb to May. JUST ALOT PICS OF MY FACES HAHA

XING WANG

MISS U GUYS

Swee Choon!!!

Zouk!

Potato Depot~

Wang wang! THE CUTEST DOG ALIVE HEHEHE. He's such a horny bitch...... Tried to hump my hand once omg..... HAHAHA

Astons!!!!!!!!!

Prawning!

Helped my friend out for her shoot hehe!

Lunch @ Tp!

And this is one of the pic from the shoot :-)

SO ITS WANG WANG AGAIN.

MAKI SAN OMG MAD CRAVINGS

Work..... :(

Sunflowers for my momsie!!!

DTF with Justin!

My new ride ^^ HAHAHHAHA

Feelings

2013-04-18T01:13:00.002+08:00

Humans, we are such funny creatures. We do things that ruin us, we like the things that are bad for us, we eat the food that are not good for us, we chase after things that will never stop running away. We smoke, we drink; knowing that all these are bad for us. We kill, we destroy, we cheat; knowing that doing all these are not acceptable. We love; knowing that when its not right to love, we would be inflicting pain on ourselves. We hate; knowing that resentment will only consume us. We chase; knowing that running in circles will only lead us back to square one. Of all the good things, we choose to do the things that will hurt us. And then we go about complaining about how fucking stupid life is. Why, why, why, do we do all these? Feelings.

Feelings, you can't keep them away. No matter how hard you try, they will always be there for you. Somewhere inside, they're just gonna keep tugging on your heart strings, making us go back to them. Terrible, isn't it? Feelings are terrible. I want to feel nothing at all.

I never know why

2013-04-09T01:31:00.003+08:00

"This is how you lose her.
You lose her when you forget to remember the little things that mean the world to her: the sincerity in a stranger’s voice during a trip to the grocery, the delight of finding something lost or forgotten like a sticker from when she was five, the selflessness of a child giving a part of his meal to another, the scent of new books in the store, the surprise short but honest notes she tucks in her journal and others you could only see if you look closely.

You must remember when she forgets.
You lose her when you don’t notice that she notices everything about you: your use of the proper punctuation that tells her continuation rather than finality, your silence when you’re about to ask a question but you think anything you’re about to say to her would be silly, your mindless humming when it is too quiet, your handwriting when you sign your name in blank sheets of paper, your muted laughter when you are trying to be polite, and more and more of what you are, which you don’t even know about yourself, because she pays attention.

She remembers when you forget.
You lose her for every second you make her feel less and less of the beauty that she is. When you make her feel that she is replaceable. She wants to feel cherished. When you make her feel that you are fleeting. She wants you to stay. When you make her feel inadequate. She wants to know that she is enough and she does not need to change for you, nor for anyone else because she is she and she is beautiful, kind and good.

You must learn her.
You must know the reason why she is silent. You must trace her weakest spots. You must write to her. You must remind her that you are there. You must know how long it takes for her to give up. You must be there to hold her when she is about to. You must love her because many have tried and failed. And she wants to know that she is worthy to be loved, that she is worthy to be kept.

And, this is how you keep her. "

One of the best things I've read on Tumblr.

breathe me

2013-04-04T22:39:00.000+08:00

Ouch, I have lost myself again

Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found

Yeah, I think that I might break

Lost myself again and I feel unsafe

2013-03-14T01:36:00.003+08:00

Life is great at the moment except that school has been nothing but a bore.......... And the fact that I'm still the same usual lazy fuck. So I guess I shall just leave this place to rot for a while. Will keep you guys updated soon!!!!!! (If you guys are still interested hehe) Till then my babies xoxo

Come back when you can

2013-03-05T14:12:00.001+08:00

You've done nothing at all to make me love you less.

Don't

2013-02-25T00:43:00.001+08:00

you will always want what you're running from

2013-02-21T19:57:00.000+08:00

Hey! Just some way overdued pictures from last year's Dec till today.

What I do in class

ughsdsdasbmnda

2013-02-19T14:28:00.002+08:00

Love is not easy. Love is not like the movies. Holding hands and kissing in the rain, rainbows and butterflies, Fireworks and paper hearts. No, love is not as easy and simple as that. Love is complicated. I'm definitely not an easy person to love and I detest that. I hope I wasn't. I hope I could've been everything that suffice. I wanted things to be simple but all I get was complication. Maybe forcing things and trying too hard does not help at all. Maybe asking for too much and having too many expectations leading to disappointments is true after all. It only made things worst. Sometimes, some things are just not meant to be fixed. I guess grudges are meant to be buried in the past. I really do hope for the best for us.

lovers hold on

2013-02-07T22:57:00.000+08:00

You promised me forever and in a day, you take it away.

thoughts

2013-02-02T03:12:00.002+08:00

So far, 2013 has been so full of shit that its already bursting at the seams. And its only February.

Its a constant battle between sadness and happiness. But sadness usually outweighs happiness. What happened to "Everything's gonna get better"??? Has it gone to waste? What happened to "Have some faith"??? Has it gone down the drain too? I'm terribly upset. Things are just not going well. Sometimes, I feel so helpless. Even though I really want to do something to actually salvage the situation... I won't know how and what to do about it. When will things get better??? I'm just hoping for a "fine". I won't ask for a "great". I just want things to be fine. Cos I know once things are fine, there would be progression.

I just realized that the older I get, things tend to fall apart more often. I feel foreign. Foreign to myself. Foreign to how I handle things now. Foreign to the feelings that I'm trying to convey. Foreign to the thoughts I habour. Things were so different then. I don't even know myself anymore. I'm growing up too fast. And sometimes, I don't even understand myself. I'm supposed to be the one who knows myself like the back of my hand. But I don't, which is really weird. There are still many dusty corners in me that I've yet to sweep. And hopefully, I would be able to find treasures in those corners instead of just cob webs.

One thing that I really just happen to know is that I'm very temperamental. Took me long enough to realize... I don't know how people can actually put up with me. I even find myself annoying.... I get so worked up and sad sometimes and then the next moment, I'm trying to persuade myself in thinking that everything's gonna be fine. Maybe I'm just a hopeful pessimist! I don't think I'm bipolar though. Temperamental me is already a fucking freak. Let's not get into the topic of me being bipolar.

I know I've not been all that. I've let people down countless times. The feeling really suck; people losing faith in you. I will thrive to be a better person. I think it not only benefits me, it also benefits the people that I truly love and care about. No matter how shitty things are right now, I'm still thankful for the things that I have and I will try my best to keep them as close to my heart as possible. I'm also thankful for the people who've chose to stay in my life. Please stay and never leave.

Goodnight xoxo

brown eyes

2013-01-28T03:13:00.001+08:00

My life for the past 2 weeks in a summary: I have the constant need to sleep and I'm getting too attached to my bed... I'm such a clingy girlfriend. Firstly, I caught Hansel & Gretel recently and it was kinda cool. Secondly, I got myself a kindle Fire HD. My life is now complete. WELL almost. I'm still waiting for it to reach my door steps. I can't wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm probably gonna neglect my bed for my kindle... And everyone else around me. So sorry but hehe too bad. Lastly, I just realized I have brown eyes. Ok I think that's all. It's getting pretty late and I've not finished my assignments but YOLO~*~*~*~ I'm just gonna sleep hehehe..... Goodnight xoxo

--

2013-01-17T19:04:00.001+08:00

Hi.

I really cannot explain how shitty everything feels right now. Firstly, Ive been stucked in bed for about 4 days now due to my super inconsistent high fever. I think I shall just name it the bipolar fever. Cos it kept going and coming back. One minute, I'm running a high fever and the next minute, my body is fighting the virus and I will start to sweat like crazy. And it just keeps going on this way. Just by walking down the stairs make me sweat, doing such simple things have never felt so taxing...... And I've never downed so many panadols in my life. I'm serious. My immune system is obviously quite fucked in some way.

Skipped school for the longest time and I'm really starting to miss it. I hope I get better tonight. The naseau is starting to kick in. I can find myself having the urge to puke and my head just keeps throbbing. My head feels like its gonna combust whenever I sneeze omg. I'm in such agony and to make everything worse, I really don't get any assurance from people that I truly love and care about. Had a tiff with my parents and I've not let them know that I'm sick. I guess this is the time to laugh in my face, haters. This is the time.

Maybe its just THAT hard to always want something to go your way. And its also so damn hard to just be happy. And to love simply. Why do humans like to make things complicated when what we should do is to appreciate the simplicity of things. And not to destroy its meaning and purpose by jumbling it up. Why? I just want a simple life though I know I'm quite complicated. But to do and enjoy the simple things, isn't that what makes life beautiful?

promise you'll stay

2013-01-12T13:03:00.002+08:00

12 days into 2013. I shall skip my annual resolutions this year. Resolutions are useless. Things happen on their own anyway. They will always find a way.

School has started. Things are going alright, I guess.. There will always be bad things going on but I guess that's how life is???? Can't change how it is. But I do hope everything will turn out well.