EdzOnline

Sabarlah Sayang...

2011-05-21T21:53:00.000+08:00

Ku masih mampu bertahan lagi

Demi kasih sayang yang ku sanjungi

Jangan kau ragui diri ini,

Kerana hati ini masih menanti.

Tidak perlu ku berkata kata,

kerana hati tetap sama,

Aku tetap hendak bersama mu

Yang menjadi pujaan hatiku.

Jangan tinggalkan diri ini

Yang dahagakan cintamu

Jangan kau lepaskan diri ini

Kerana takut akan rindu mu.

True Love

2011-05-20T22:23:00.000+08:00

Love,

It is pure,

It is gentle,

It comes naturally.

Love,

Deep in the heart,

Belongs to 2 souls,

To be one.

Love,

It gives one guilt,

For hurting the other,

It is pleasure,

When both are deep in it.

Love,

Distance does not matter,

Trust is.

Have faith,

It will always be true.

Love,

No matter how bad missing you is,

It makes one stronger,

Going thru the days,

Awaiting to see you again.

Love,

dreamt of you,

Each night of you.

Loving u.

Life is fulfilled,

and one is content

when one meets true love.

Teeth

2011-05-18T20:58:00.000+08:00

Hello All,

Sorry for the long absence again. I was busy and i was sick.

About 2-3 years ago, I remembered sharing a post on how pain my teeth was - the molar. The root canal treatment would be about $2K plus and i cant use medisave. I decided to live with the pain, took consultations with 4 dentist and the last one gave me antibiotics. It subsided. However somewhere along after that, my molar broke into 2.

I left it alone until recently. My gum swell so bad that i had to visit a dentist.

The result?

An extraction. It cost me $620.00 payable by medisave - i hope its 100%.

The initial cost was $70 and $50 for administration charge. total cost $740!

I already fork out $120 in cash, claimable by company is $70. I hope the balance is medisave approved.

Today i went back to remove the stitch. Guess what? the dentist did the cleaning, declare that i have gum disease and it will take her 4 weeks to get everything out of my gums at a cost of $800! :(

Now should i proceed or should i get a 2nd opinion?

I know i did not take good care of my teeth and i tihnk i better start now, considering im 30 and they said all sorts of illnesses do leads on to other diseases in life.

But i seriously need an opinion from anyone of you familiar with this. Anyone can help to give that 2nd, 3rd opinion?

Do let me know by commenting on this post OR email me at aidil_edzwan@hotmail.co.uk.

Dear God

2011-04-08T07:09:00.000+08:00

Dear God,
Please hear my plea,
A plea from your humble servant,
Whom You ordained his life to be.

Dear God,
Your command,
Is my duty,
Your Punishments,
Is what i deserve,
Your rewards,
Is what i love.

Dear God,
How can this be?
A feeling that is not meant to be,
A life of not my own choosing,
Can my desire be change to what i want it to be?

Dear God,
Why does everyone treat me so?
When i have given so much in return for love
Why am i so ridicule?
When i am still a servant of You?

Dear God,
I live the life,
Which I hope is what You Approve,
So when i do return to You,
Heaven is granted to me.

Dear God,
I live my life,
for they who brought me to this world,
the unconditional love that was given,
May You grant them the highest Heaven.

Dear God,
Receive them in kind blessings,
Honour them in high regard,
Parents whom i place on the pedestal,
Whose unconditional love can move the Heaven.

Amin.

Makkah Al Mukarramah

2011-03-11T22:44:00.001+08:00

Bismillahirrahmannirrahim,

Assalamualaikum Warrahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

Strange to some of you who seems to wonder what doest the 2 words mean.

the first one is what a Muslim says before he begins doing a task - or anything. It simply means,
In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate".

while the second one means May Peace be unto you and so may the Mercy of Allah & His Blessings.
It is a common place greeting by any Muslim around the world.

While i wish to share with you more on the common place greets, however, my true purpose of writing today is to explain certain things which i feel very sensitive has to be put in perspective.

It is about Makkah Al Munawarrah or Masjidil Al Haram.

The centre of Islam - Muslims flock to this place annually during the pilgrimage OR any other time of the year for the umrah.

It is a place for one to seek solaee, guidance, shelter & forgiveness.

Much has been discussed about it - the conditions of Makkah, the rituals, the people we come across etc.

As Muslims, we abide by His Law that He has revealed in His Book. We follow what had been prescribed for us.

What happens in our life, is by our choice but it is His Will which generally direct us to the way that we should go - for if the intention is pure, one will be rewarded accordingly.

Now, an individual Muslim, regardless who he is or what he is or how bad he is or how good he is - is still an individual. He is a servant of God like any of us. Who are we, humans, to assume that, who is good enough to face the God Almighty?

He is accessible to us 24/7, on a personal relationship with us 5x a day and yet there are some of you out there still dare to pass judgemental remarks to an individual without considering the choice that happen was not by that individual alone? It could have been part of divine planning.

The sacred Mosque - Masjidil Haram, is forbidden to non-Muslims. This is revealed in the Al Quran:
'Oh you who believe! Truly the idolaters are unclean; so let them not, after this year, approach the Sacred Mosque....(9:28)'

However, due to the nature of the city which attracts overwhelming crowd, the ban has been extended to the two cities "Makkah in its entirety & Madina also in its entirety."

The only passport one needs to enter the city is to pronounce the article of faith - the 1st that is required of All Muslim - which is the syahadah.

Yes. One must be a Muslim to enter it.

Whatever the state of a Muslim he is in, is NOT for anyone to decide. If such is fated that he is given the honour to visit the Holy City in whatever condition he is in, so be it. We as fellow Muslim MUST be proud that our friend was given the honour to be there.

Dont be very judgemental my friends, you never know when it is your turn, when others mock at you the moment you decide to visit the Holy City itself.

May Allah give us His Blessings & let us be in the City One day. Insya Allah.

Bomoh & Rezeki

2011-02-20T23:48:00.000+08:00

Good Evening all,

After such a long disappearance, finally I decide to write something that i simply came across today.
Bomoh in English simply means witch doctor while Rezeki is a malay word translated from Arabic which equates to the meaning Providence.

Now, why i write something out about this because, i had my fair share of ups and downs in life. I m 30 this year and i am sure some of you have been thru bad times as well.

Now, as a muslim, we always believe in God granting us providence. It may come in various forms - the salary that we earn, an extra job that we get to earn more, food given from next door neighbours or friends that can sustain us for a day or anything that can help us.

Islam has never allowed us to believe in heresy that compromise our morality standing in the sight of the Almighty. Never to associate Him with others. This is evident in His Firman (word) to us in the Quran - Surah Al Araf Verse 187 to 192. I think these few verses, describes the whole situation well on associating Him with others.

Therefore, when upon asking providence there are many things we have to consider:

1. Self
many forgot that providence is provided to us, if one is self - righteous, religion abiding to His Command. You are required to work for that providence, find ways to earn a living with what you have. If you are strong go out and work, if you are weak, do something within your capability. begging for money IS not working.

2. Surrender
many dont remember to surrender completely on sustenance. One should never despair but continue to surrender whole heartedly

3. Beseech
Pray and pray and pray for his Help for He loves to hear our pleas for Help. Remember that tears of regret & help is more favoured by Him so it is a loss if you do not do it.

4. Effort
As long as effort is made, rest assured providence will be given to you.

However, if you decide to turn to bomoh to ensure the success of your business rather than beseeching the Almighty, you are making a stupid mistake.

Perhaps you may be happy for a while but there will be more trouble leading to it.

The iman in our hearts is not always at the top level, at times it drops very low or reach as high as it can go. The devil will always try to hit us and ensure that our iman shattered in order to push out to the wrong path.

Before you embark on such project, i suggest you learn how to manage things wisely first, prepare enough capital to last you if your efforts failed you.

While writing this, I tried to remember the many incidences that i came across based on personal and when others is around. I am not saying that I am a righteous fellow or a favoured person by Him. No. I am not, but if we surrender completely to Him, Insya Allah, we will be rewarded.

Sometime back in 2005, i was still new at my job, earning a miserable pay. It was one of those Fridays that i have to go to the mosque. It was about a few days to pay day but my bank account was totally $0.00! I was like worried how do i have to survive for lunch. I didnt want to think much about it as i can still survive on biscuits in the office and all i need to do is endure.

Off i went to the mosque & silently prayed that i wont go hungry. Silently prayed in my heart how sorry i am for not able to put some small token to the donation box.

After prayers, i left slowly with the rest easing out of the small gate. Near to the entrance of the gate is a small make-shift stall selling kuehs for less than $2.00. I could not even afford that.

As i was coming closer & my eyes scanned the table, i can see, all sort of kuehs...it definitely made me hungry..i was about to turn my head away when a malay lady at the table manning the foodstall, smiled at me.

I return her smile & was about to quickly walk out when she stopped me. This is what she said,"Adik, tadi ada orang datang sedekah beriyani & kakak di amanahkan untuk memberi kepada sesiapa sahaja. Ni tinggal sebungkus sahaja..adik ambil lah ye..."

For the benefit of the non-malay readers i will repeat it in english.

This is what she said,"Adik, just now there is someone who came to donate beriyani (the nasi beriyani) & Kakak is entrusted to give this away to anyone & here left 1 packet only. Please take it"

You can imagine my reaction. I offered my thanks, smile at her while tears glistened in my eyes.

I went to the nearest void deck & ate till i was full! I was very happy. You can imagine my tears while i ate...i thank Him for being so nice to me even when i was so against Him. You can imagine the love He has for us and yet we disrespect him.

That was one. The next one happen 2 years ago.

Those of you who know my mom knows how soft spoken & friendly she is to anyone. She is in fact a Queen of the household. You all know that she is one of a kind. She can compromise anythign with us on worldly matters EXCEPT religion issues. That one has no room for negotiation. I know, i was a privilege of this tutelage.

Those who know me that 2 years ago, it was a difficult time for the family financially as there were only 2 incomes coming in - me & dad.

Two years ago, my home aircon broke down & so did the fridge. My parents had good financial savings so they pool whatever they had kept to purchase a new aircon which we inherited from the previous owner & a new fridge. Total cost was $2.6K.

We were at Harvey Norman buying a new fridge. As we purchased more than a certain more, we were entitled to a "scratch & win" card. The minimal price is $1.00 and the maximum is $200.00

I was never lucky but Mother was with me on that day together with Dad. I always believe that Allah favoured my mother for her job in raising us up.

I was paying the bills with the cash that mom gave me while she is beside me and dad was somewhere behind us. I was happily scratching when i saw the amount $1.00. I smiled at mother and continue scratching at the 2nd card. Lo & Behold, i saw the digit $2 and scratch harder and reveal $200.00!

The sales assistants who attended to us got shocked as we were the first winners of that voucher & we had $201 to offset on our next purchase.

My mother's reaction was more predictable. The moment she heard it she goes "Alhamdulillah".

No prizes for guessing where did that $201 went to - my performance bonus was in July & i bought my dad a new TV which he had been harping for together with my bonus.

So you see, if only we trust Him in our problems - Insya Allah He will ensure providence is enough for us. I have never dreamt of becoming rich but i always hope He provides me more NOT because i m greedy but because i want to give out more to others. Our monies or wealth are not solely for us. A lot of lives can change if they benefit from our charity. I always prayed that He sustained me in good health and wealth so that my family can benefit from me & each salary day i begin with thanks and prayer and i proceed to part with my money very early in the morning to the household before i pass it on to charity.

Some call it waste of time. I call it an investment. Insya Allah we will be rewarded many times more than what a bomoh can ever do for us.

This post is dedicated to a friend who has gone thru a lot in life & i respect her as the person she is. A very responsible person who knows what she wants in life & who cares much for her mother, for remember that there are many reasons for rezeki..more than 30 reasons and one of them, is caring for your parents will ensure rezeki to be given to you. Insya Allah.

Outing

2011-02-03T22:43:00.000+08:00

It has been such a quiet month. Basically i been busy. New Year, rush for reports etc. Falling sick.

I am now typing this at my parent's place on the first day of the Chinese New Year.

I spent my evening with Abang Sufian & Fazlee - a last minute plan that I decided on since it has been a while since i meet them. The last one was when i was hosting a Hari raya open house when i cook lots of dishes for them :)

Abg Sufian brought along his korean friend who was bunking in so there were four. Halfway, his long childhood friend sms him and he joined us too and we were 5.

It was a fun evening. Getting to know Korean guy and his childhood friend. Exchanging ideas and opinions.

Where we dine ? - Abg Sufian suggested this Vintage Delicafe at Bussorah Street - i went off and find it. I didnt know he actually had place a reservation and i blur sotong go and walk in...it was when i called him that he told me that he have reserved a table.

Nice cosy place and not too cold. Food is served piping hot which i like. I had fussilini chicken soup It is definitely nice. Me and Suf had the same thing, Fazy had the carbonara..Jae the korean guy had spaghetti and Imran had fish & chips.

I enjoyed the evening. It was nice to catch up and chat over dinner. It is something facebook can ever give. :)

Hope all of you enjoy it too. Hugs ^^

Happy New Year 2011

2011-01-01T09:01:00.000+08:00

Morning All!

happy new year to you and hope the new year will unfold many great things for you.

i dont believe in new year resolutions. it may help for some people, it may not for some.

to me; if you want to change you can do it anytime not just on new year's day.

dont promise yourself something that you are unlikely to keep..just live life as it is and try to be a better person today than yesterday.

Salam Maal Hijrah

2010-12-06T10:38:00.000+08:00

Today marks the last day of the Islamic Year 1431H. For your guidance & Information.

To recite the "year end doa" at the last moments of asar; maybe 15 minutes before maghrib. You can recite it after asar prayers if you find it reciting on the way home feels weird. As usual, i manage to find it from my archives of emails forwarded by wonderful colleagues :) Alhamdulillah.

To recite the "new year doa" after maghrib prayers

Bismillaahirrahmaanirraahiim, wa shollalloohu'alaa sayyididinaa muhammaadin

wa'alaa aalihi wa shohbihii wa sallama, Alloohumma maa'amiltu fii hadzihis

sanati mimmaa nahaitanii'anhu falam atub minhu wa lam tardhohu wa lam tansahu

wa hamiltu 'alayya ba'da qudrotika 'uquubati wa da'autanii ilattaubati minhu

ba'da jiroo-atii 'alaa ma'shiyatika fa-innii astaghfiruka faghfirlii bifadhlika

wa maa'amiltuhu fiiha mimma tardhoohu wa wa'adtanii 'alaihits tsawaba wa

as-aluka. Alloohumma yaa kariimu yaadzal jalaali wal ikroomi antaqobbalahu

minnii walaa taqtho' rojaa-i minka yaa kiriimu wa shollalloohu 'alaa sayyidinaa

muhammadin wa 'alaa aalihi wa shohbihii wa sallama.

"Dengan nama Allah yang Maha Pengasih lagi Maha Penyayang. Semoga rahmat dan

salam Allah tetap tercurahkan kepada junjungan kami Nabi Muhammad teriring

keluarga serta sahabat beliau. Wahai Tuhanku, apa yang hamba perbuat sepanjang

tahun ini berupa perbuatan perbuatan yang Paduka larang hamba melakukannya,

sedangka hamba belum bertaubat dari padanya dan Paduka tidak meridhainya dan

tidak melupakannya, dan Padukapun telah menyayangi hamba setelah Padukapun

kuasa untuk menyiksa hamba, kemudian Paduka menyeru hamba untuk bertaubat

setelah hamba bermaksiat kepada Paduka. Karena itu, hamba mohon ampunan dari

Paduka, maka ampunilah hamba dengan Anugerah-Mu

Dan apa yang telah hamba kerjakan ditahun ini adalah berupa perbuatan yang

Paduka ridhai dan Paduka janjikan pahala atasnya, Hamba mohon pada-Mu wahai

Tuhanku, Dzat Yang Maha Mulia, yang memiliki Kebesaran dan Kemuliaan, agar

Paduka terima amalan hamba dan jangan hendaknya Paduka putuskan harapan hamba

dari-Mu, wahai Dzat Yang Maha Mulia. Semoga rahmat dan salam Allah tetap

tercurahkan kepada junjungan kami Nabi Muhammad teriring keluarga serta sahabat

beliau."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Doa Awal Tahun Hijrah

Bismillaahirohmaanirrohiim. wa shollalloohu 'alaa sayyidinaa muhammadin wa

'alaa aalihi wa shohbihii wa sallama. Allohumma antal abadiyyul qodiimul awwalu

wa 'alaa fadhlikal 'adliimi wujuudikal mu'awwali wahaadza'aamunjadiidun qod

aqbala nas-alukal 'ishmata fiihi minasysyaithooni wa auli yaa-ihi wa junuudihi

wal 'auni 'alaa haadzihil ammaaroti bissuu-i wal istighooli bimaa yuqorribunii

ilaika zulfa yaa dzal jallali wal ikroom. wa shollalloohu 'alaa sayyidinaa

muhammadin wa 'alaa aalihi wa shohbihii wa sallama.

"Dengan nama Allah Yang Maha Pengasih lagi Maha Penyayang. Semoga rahmat dan

salam Allah tetap tercurahkan kepada junjungan kami Nabi Muhammad teriring

keluarga serta sahabat beliau.

Wahai Tuhanku, Paduka adalah Dzat Yang Maha Kekal, dahulu dan Awal. Hanya denga

anugrah dan kemurahan-Mu yang agung, telah datang tahun baru. Di tahun ini kami

memohon pemeliharaan-Mu dari Syetan, kekasihnya dan balatentaranya, dan kami

memohon pertolongan-Mu atas hawa nafsu yang mengajak kepada kejelekan, dan kami

memohon kesibukan dengan perbuatan yang dapat mendekatkan diri kami kepada-Mu

wahai Dzat yang memiliki kebesaran dan kemuliaan. Semoga rahmat dan salam Allah

tetap tercurahkan kepada junjungan kami Nabi Muhammad teriring keluarga serta

sahabat beliau." Amiin ya robbal 'alamiin...

New Mufti & Social issues facing by the Muslim Community

2010-11-17T13:24:00.000+08:00

Salam,

It was announced without much fanfare, the appointment of Ustaz Fatris Bakaram. I remember attending his classes way back in 1994/1995 - the Fardu Ain if i am not wrong. May Allah SWT guide him well in his new capacity as Mufti of Singapore

I didn't attend for long as I am always being taunted by the children at the mosque. You know the usual teasing, bullying...

Anyway that's beside the point.

Yesterday, my colleague email some of us with regards to the changes or feedback that we desire to see with the appointment to the new Mufti.

I am not sure whether there has yet to be changes. The jurisdiction of the MUIS office is never an independent organization but is tied up to MCYS - if you get my point.

Currently, religion is a personal and secondary issue and is never a paramount issue in any secular matters.

However being a Muslim is to integrate that into your secular life. It should not actually trouble you much in being someone secular.

Firstly, i would question:

1. What makes a Singapore Muslim?
2. How do you identify a Singaporean Muslim?
3. Why is it necessary to be identified?

Our community is close knitted. I sincerely believe we all know each other. Look at weddings. thousands turn up just to a wedding. This shows that there is still an acknowledgement of "silaturrahim" within the community.

However, how many of us would greet a fellow Muslim in the lift, along the corridor or just smile sincerely?

Do we keep our home door open or close all the times?

Do we know our neighbours?

Dont apply this to Muslims, how about non-muslims? Are we being the persons that our religion obliged us to?

And unlike other communities - who have issues, we also have issues too:

1. Majority of the Muslims here are malays and we have been plagued by issues like - education progression, salaries difference, housing debts etc...

2. We rarely take time to acknowledge the other Muslims brethren such as Indian, Chinese.

3. Our moralities - are we sending the right message to be a modern Malay/Chinese/Indian Muslim that practise our religion and we also can adhere to the growing demands of the global platform?

I would prefer a very much a whole review of the entire community choice of life or way of living. True it is definitely a personal matter but there must be a certain guiding point in our life - lead by the Islamic Council. This would definitely helpful - considering that youth nowadays spends more time on the web than out of the home.

Let's tackle the 2nd point first:
Notice that since the day i ever stepped into the mosque until now, all khutbahs are generally in the Malay Language. no doubt that the Malay language is the national language. However, i notice that in recent years, there are Muallafs around on Friday prayers. Notice that some of them do LOOK lost when the khutbah is being read to them. The intepretation screened on TV may not help if they happen not to be around near it or short sighted - they take off spectacles when they go prayers usually.

I am fairly certain that majority of the elders now are those that belong to majority that are able to understand and converse in the English Language. Many decades have passed since LKY insistence that everyone must learn English. I am sure it must have rubbed a bit on some of them.

There should be a review of this. It is important. Otherwise our Muallaf may get bored, and if the end up asking the next person what is being talk about (he is not supposed to while Khutbah is being read) will cause unnecessary misunderstanding between 2 brethrens of Islam.

True that the Khutbah is available online. Frankly speaking, i rarely go online and look out or read the khutbah as i have already heard it in Malay the language i understand. But how may of the Muallaf will do that?

Being said that, it is up to each individual on how to find the source of the khutbah however the starting point must be right too & i believe this ought to be considered.

The first issue is endless. It covers all issues regarding education, jobs and money.
For years, our Malay Muslim community have strive their very best to improve and i think we seeing better results now than 20 years ago. However, it seems that there is always a black mark somewhere. I have come across articles which seems to say "melayu must do better" or "more can be done" or "melayu giving up" or in short - sometimes i feel the appropriate title would be Melayu Masih Bodoh.

I dont deny that some of us in our community are slow in progress. However that does not necessary means we are slowing as a community.

Frankly, i am proud of our community but at the same time disappointed. For some reasons nowadays, people rarely help you with full sincerity. For helping someone, there must be something in for you. no keikhlasan if you asked me. Social standing is important too. The size of your HDB flat indicates your superiority among your family members. The amount of money, your job, your clothes, your possession is far far far more important than anything else. The number of trips to Makkah for Haj or Umrah seems to be worldly acknowledgement which has something to do with - social standing. Does going more trips to the Holy City makes you more holy and superior than others or it is supposed to bring you down gently to earth and acknowledge that no one is superior or above each other and only He has dominion over us all?

I dare to say this because I have seen this shoved in my face many times. I admit, I am who i am but that doesn't mean i dont listen. Wisdom comes to all and we regret many things that we done in our youth. We just hope that the past will not catch up with us and we can move on towards the path that leads to Eden.

I am fairly sure, that in terms of education, we have been pulling our socks high. There is one aspect i believe MUIS can make a suggestio. However i know that it is very rare for one Statutory board to dip their fingers into another but that does not mean they cant nor there isn't any precedent for it.

I believe education is the key to the well being of the Ummah. Therefore, perhaps MUIS can review the Civic & Moral education subject that is being taught. Aside from the 5 pillars of Islam, more details can be emphasized on the appropriate attire required of the Muslim Man & Lady, the significant of the call to prayer etc.

I have 2 sisters, one was pretty scrawny while growing up and the other is quite robust, in fact bless with a good figure. I am very uncomfortable seeing her in skirts in school uniform. I have seen eyes leering at her. I have seen mature men looking at her. I am not saying that my sister is gorgeous. definitely not. I am uncomfortable with men having thoughts about her.

I often wonder why. This will be the subject that will be part of point 3.

If during PE lessons, they are allowed to wear trackpants, i sincerely believe if they were to think about it, they too can allow, pants for girls too. I pray for the day will come. Hijab is not necessary. At this time, i am thinking the need of being secular and uniformity of the uniform and integrating the need for a Muslim to guard her modesty while being secular. This is only a thought. I will still have to respect the rules. After all the law of the country is man-made. Muslim laws came from Him.

In terms of HDB debts, jobs . I believe a certain political party is bring it up in the next election. You may want to give DUE consideration to this. I feel there is a flaw somewhere with the current policy but i am not that analytical of a person to understand the impact it would make if a certain process is taken out from it. Obviously it has not been experimented but it is worth giving a thought.

http://votingrp.wordpress.com/2010/11/14/affordability-of-hdb-flats-a-response-to-minister-of-national-development/

I won't dawdle much on jobs or HDB flats. This issues are non-pressing. We cant control it but we can achieve it - insya Allah.

In recent years, we have been shocked into insensibility with the self made sex videos of our very own youth and I am aware of the fact that there were more children born out of wedlock and also high abortion.

It is obvious. However we turn a blind eye to all this and seems contend that as long as the person doing that deed is not in anyway part of my family, it is none of our business.

This is where MUIS can step in. Review the whole process. Dont just be part of the counselling process. Instead promote it from the root itself. Prevention is better than cure. There are just too much western influences out there.

Civil marriages happens too. I been invited to civils receptions - one of them involved a malay girl with her non-muslim bf turn husband to be and another is a malay chap with a non-muslim gf.

Their back ground is very much the typical like most of us. Industrious hard working parents, spent more time labouring at work trying to pay off the housing debts and keeping up with the social life. Money given to kids seems to be the solution for the time spent at work.

Frankly it is NON of my business. But however, what message are we sending to the rest of the youth? that it is ok to go for civil marriages?

For some reasons the MUIS authority are limited to marriages and divorces. That seems to be the primary role aside from Hajj and announcements of Raya and fasting etc.

More can be done. It is about time MUIS make bold approach towards promoting the Islamic New Year, the Maulidur Rasul or the Nuzul Al Quran etc.

At the same time, share the values of good people of our faith. Encourage this through education. Set aside a time frame of say within a year, at least spent a compulsory 30 days for youth to understand what Islam is all about. Encourage them to be part of the community.

I worked in budget hotel before which has a 2 hour so called transit check in. I have seen males and females alike muslims or not; checking in. They cant be having a rest alright. To put it delicately; shall we say, entertaining each other?

Mosque officials should be reviewed based on KPI & Performances. I have seen mosque officials accepting tokens and monetaries because the giver happens to be wanting for a favour to be done and that token is part of "ikhlas" i mean seriously. They earn a decent salary and being part of the civil group as i recall, should not that be given in the first place?

This i realise is happening whenever a kadi goes to a house to conduct the solemnization. A family member usually the groom's father, will prepare a small token for the kadi. I would like to believe the cos t of that has already been included in the amount that we paid at the office for registering and choosing the kadi himself.

I am not criticizing but there is a difference in giving monies to people. As i recall sedekah is to be given to those who cant afford basic needs, someone who has trouble getting thru life, yet he is patience, love the Lord and do work hard to improve his life, and endure whatever the Lord has given him. These group ought to be help. NOT those who are wheel chair bound and get their help from mosque and later spent it on booze. HEY I HAVE SEEN THIS BEFORE OK! Just that i never take pictures of it.

I believe more can be done to help the lowest in society. Religious obligations must be acknowledge. It is from there than i believe we will progress slowly and cut down on all this children out of wedlock issues, premarital sex and so on.

That is where the school book review comes in handy. Incorporate the Muslim way of life into it. Understanding the way of a life of a Muslim goes hand in hand everyday.

Parents have a role to play. They have to advise what is right or wrong in their children attire. As i mentioned my own personal experience with regards to my sister, i am afraid of things that might happen.

Guys in a group gossip more than 2 aunties in a market. One of them ever mention that malay girls the young ones would do ANYTHING for just a little bit of money.

The details that follow, shamed me to the core. Is this the Malay Muslim image that we are portraying?

Just for $20.00 some of them are willing to give in to the lusty demands and they are young. 15 year olds/16 year olds...against a 35 year old?

I am not sure if he is exaggerating, if he is,it is not by very much considering my own experience; judging by the number of check in i do at my previous employment.

A marriage is for life; however, infidelity is common too. How is this being tackled?

I am not saying it is a compulsory and there are many details and subjected to objections of various faction but i hope it is worth considering. Remember our youth of today will be the leaders of tomorrow and with all the globalisation going on, it is possible to put the context of Islam seamlessly into secular.

do not establish an excuse for it because once it is establish, there will be no way forward.

More issues can be raised but it is up to us as community to look back and asked ourselves if we want to be a slave to worldly matters OR a slave to Him. It is up to each individual which makes the community as a whole to make a difference in our youth or ourselves in fact. Some of you may feel that I am not in a position to raise my point or i do not have a say in this because of my background BUT i dare to say it because, it is an eyesore or a social issue. One day, something will happen and that will take another Minister to blast at us again and will be a farce on the newspaper for weeks!

Finally I have always this to say:

Patience towards challenges has its rewards, for in that challenge one become wiser and i am contend that He will never give me a challenge that is too heavy for me to bear. Insya Allah, with His Help, my plea for help, it will be overcome.

This is for those who are facing issues right now. remember there is no short cut to achieve your dreams. Bukan Senang nak menjadi orang Senang.

For those who have attained their desired level:
Help others. Raise them from the ground. He wants us to do so. Do not take advantage from it. He will reward you for helping - insya Allah.

Salam Aidil Adha

2010-11-17T10:54:00.000+08:00

Good Day! :)

It has been a while since i last updated this blog. I been too depressed and busy at work that I dont even have the time to write something decent.

However, taking this opportunity to wish everyone who do visit this blog - Salam Idul Adha and May You Have A Great Day With Family.

An Excerpt from my facebook notes

2010-10-28T10:39:00.000+08:00

Thank you once again to everyone who asked me about the above subject for my personal opinion. I am not sure why you asked but i guess i am obliged to answer. As there is quite a number of emails, i suppose i better answer thru this otherwise it will be very tiring typing out one by one :)
I am not a saint nor i am the devil. We are all humans and we all make mistakes in life. However as we gradually grow older, we tend to choose the path that we eventually want to lead.

The very first time i heard of Halloween was when i was 15 years old. I was greeted by some schoolmates in the day "Happy Halloween". We dont have internet at that time so i checked out the library.

Of course there are many versions of how the event started and I am no expert in historical facts to ascertain it. Therefore the best is dont believe a word of it.

However, from an Islamic stand point of view differs however.
I will try to point out gently why it should not be considered a culture and celebrate it.

In a multi racial society of course we cant avoid this but at least we respect the people who wishes to celebrate. We dont need to tell them NOOOO ITS HARAM or something like that... we can choose to just smile and tell them to enjoy the day as long as we defy it in our hearts.

Reason 1:
It is not an Islamic holiday.
So is chinese new year, or deepavali or christmas - some would say. But i said we dont celebrate by offering prayers to any of the temples or go to churches right?
Halloween do not have any of those but by attending a party and dressing up as ghost and ghouls and whatever not, tell me what are you doing?

Reason 2:
Some say it is permissible as it is just a party and there is no worshipping or whatsoever.
Well, why not dress decently then? must you dress up as some ghost or whatever? Allah SWT created Man in his finest form. It is so fine that the theory that Man evolve from Ape do not even hold. Why? The Quran did not SAY anything about Man being part of the apes!

Reason 3:
Such parties usually are celebrated by non-muslims and most of the time , many clubs hold parties and some individuals do actually have such events going on. We are only human and we get influenced easily if we do attend such party. Getting intoxicated may lead to other things - you never know. As i said we are only humans.

Reason 4:
It is unrealistic that you can attend a night of party on Halloween but rarely have the time to do a Taubat nasuha, tahajjud or tasbih prayer at night.

Reason 5:
Some say individuals are responsible for their actions. Then let me ask, why bother calling yourself part of an Ummah then? We are here to remind each other. If you choose to go ahead it is your call but i hope you do heed my advise as well.

Reason 6:
Encouragement of any form for such a party is not acceptable. Preparing costumes, providing it, doing horrifying make ups on that day - why? There are many other things to do - why choose to glorify it?
I am in no way telling you what to do or what not to do. In our daily life, we should strive towards balancing between what is ok for us and what is not ok for us. Mistakes that has happen in the past should not be allowed to be done again now.

In striving towards the wellness or goodness of our own Ummah, we must further think of the consequences of our actions.

In ending this short note which i am sure will be a debate for some towards by end of day as many of us have various opinion let me share with you a verse which i think simply advise us not to make the same mistake and to follow what is prescribed upon us:

Surah Al Ma'idah Verse 104
"When it is said unto them, 'Come to what Allah has revealed, come to the Messenger,' they say, 'Enough for us are the ways we found our fathers following.' What! Even though their fathers were void of knowledge and guidance?"

As what my colleague has ever mention to me:
Yang batil tetap batil, and no matter how hard you try to correct it, it is still batil. In this respect, never ask for His blessing when you are doing something that is not prescribed to us by Him.

I hope this answers most of your questions to me. I try not to be too long winded but just put up the important points for you.

Sekian Terima Kasih

.

All that begins with a good intent ends with a good intent

2010-10-21T20:59:00.000+08:00

Syukran Allah or Thank you Allah begins this post.

At exactly 1902hrs today, i received an sms from the army that i am not required to serve the overseas training which will be held from the 7th November 2010 - 24th November 2010.

There are many reasons that i can actually write out here but it reflects a lot on me. I have a family to honour and i shall keep it enclosed within my heart why i dont wanna go. I think let the personnel who happen to see the doctor's letter be the one to know what happen. Nothing shall escape my lips.

However, a few people to thank for being such a strong pillar of support!

1. My new CQMS - Abang Herman or SGT Herman.
i got to know this father of 2, a very quiet, reflective & pious individual earlier this year when he came to join our unit for the very first time for an incamp training. It took me a while to warm up to him but no regrets :)

His knowledge of religious views is vast and i can share with him my thoughts without being oppressed. Of course i must always draw the line that he is an elder and he deserves all the respect from me.

Truly, he is one of those whom i shared the reasons. I am very very afraid to go. On Oct 18, i told him i feel very depressed. He told me to continue praying & believing in Him.

Prior to that 01st Oct was the briefing, and i told him how i felt after it. Immediately i didnt waste time and decided to check in to the poly clinic to get referrals to get to the hospital for a medical review.

My review was done on the 15th Oct, and deferred submission on the 16th.

On the18th they called me and i started having goosebumps and nausea and all that which is associated with feelings of uneasiness.

His smses are very reassuring. His encouraging words are something that i rarely hear of from my own father too. Imagine at 29 i m still afraid? you have no idea what i went thru in life.

What strikes me most is his patience with people around him, the way he advises me - that i have to open my heart, relief myself of all worries and let Him handle it for me. He encourage me to continuously zikir or glorified Him and share with Him my worries.

I recollect my thoughts, gather all the calmness and begin my non-stop zikir till i slept.

I was more calm.

19th October went to submit my kit bag and went to medical centre to meet the MO. The review by MO was not that fantastic but i guess they do want us to go. Hence again i trust Allah will never forsake me. Hence i continue believing in Him.

21st - the result of patience. ALL I CAN SAY ALHAMDULILLAH ALHAMDULILLAH ALHAMDULILLAH!

Abang Herman you are like a brother that i never have. I am truly thankful for your guidance. You said that I bring you closer to Him but actually you narrow the gap i have with Him. May He gives you the best that He has ever give to anyone! :) AMin.

2. Next is my colleague - Abang Jati
He seems to know that i look very pale and sickly because of the deferrment case. He also advise me to zikir and glorified Allah. i guess he seconded Abg Herman's suggestion indirectly! :)

Thank you to Abg Jati for being such a great soul.

3. Next is one of my friends who never fails to make me laugh - Surjali Aslah!

I went to him to ask for an opinion on prayers to calm the heart after Jati. He advise me to zikir and also glorifed Him & say salam to the Prophet PBUH.

My thanks to you too.

Alhamdulillah.

May Allah bless all of you. I have never been so blessed i have been felt so love and thankful.

You have no idea how much this deferment means to me. At least i can plan my life ahead for another month or so.

Thank you abang Herman, abang Jati & Jali! I love you all. Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah!

And with that news, it seems appropriate to sujud syukur for the wish that came true. Amin.

Should I or Not?

2010-10-12T22:24:00.000+08:00

I am thrilled that my dishes manage to gain attention.

Friends have asked for recipes and i gladly share it away. :)

Therefore, i m pleased to ask for your opinion if i should take up my friend's offer to cook for him and close friends.

The thing is, he wants me to cook for less than 10 pax..and asking for a catering company is gonna cost him a bomb..whereas he doesnt wanna go the hassle of cooking (or rather ask his mom)

should i or should i not?

Do advise me by commenting on this post. thank you!

Turning 29.

2010-10-07T23:18:00.000+08:00

As like the previous years, i have the tendency to write something up on the eve of my birthday. This year is no different.

This would be the last of the twenties. It is my 29th.

Life for me has not changed much. I am still the same person, wearing the same clothes almost every other day but perhaps i have changed to be a more better person.

Aside recent activities, that caused my temper to flare - i find that many old friends have begin to touch base with me. I was also consulted on various issues they face from financial matters to marriage life issues.

I am not sure why they tend to ask me but perhaps, they believe that i have faced much of life adversity and i always believe there are more to come depending on the type of person you are.

Nevertheless, i am always thankful for what has been given to me. Alhamdulillah, my providence is still with this same company. My providence is not meant for me alone. It is shared among family & the less fortunate.

There are many of my old friends who are of the same age as me, love the life that i lived, endure the pain that i went through and laugh together with me during good times.

For that, here with are the people i dedicate my life to:

My father

He looks like Mahadi Syor if you dont give him a 2nd look. He may look serious but actually he is a clown beneath. He never fails to make us laugh during our meals together.

He is a very good father. I am very sure of that because at his age now, he still works to support the family. He is someone i can pour my woes to and share my problem with. Usually finance matters i will let him know :)

I am like his personal assistant, approving his credit cards, allowing what to buy what not to buy and all financial matters must seek my approval before he swipe the cards.

He is one person that i always love but i will never show it :P coz he is not the sentimental type!

My Mother

Mother has been the central person in my life. She adores me and i know that :)
There are many things i can actually write and go on and on about her but i guess not before you guys find it cloying.

Whatever it is, i am very sure you all know Mothers are the best cook, best person to let ur emotions to, u can cry your heart out and she will ease your heartache, be ill and she will be the doctor.

A mother completes our life. I will never know what life is like without her. :)

Beloved

Finally, i m putting this on record. Beloved is someone very close to me. beloved dont like to be mentioned nor to be seen but beloved is around :) physically & emotionally.

Beloved adores me too and forgives me too easily whenever i made my beloved angry. that's beloved nature.

Such is the bond that we have. Till date, i still love my beloved.

Siblings

As the eldest of 4, i hold part of the responsibility of nurturing, disciplining them. I realize that the hard tactic of scolding and screaming no longer works. I turn to be more friendly in my approach nowadays and talk it out with them as compared to last time. It seems to work better.

To Y - you are my sister; among the 4 of us, you made it all the way up there. I can only pray that Allah bless you with a good husband, good children in future & a good marriage life. Obstacles are meant for us to go thru. it is only thru these life lessons we grow up to a be better person.
You are the most beautiful among us and we all know it. The ugly duckling is now a beautiful swan. I watch you grew up remember that. You also dont take to heart what others say or did towards you. I have eyes and ears and i heard and seen what others did to you. I m thankful that you do not follow my hot tempered nature. Such is the balance that exist between us.

PS: tell him to count his blessings. u know who i m referring to.

To K - you are the other male after your sister. A huge responsibility awaits us. Aside from what had happen within this few weeks, i hope you will know what the word "responsibility" means. In 2 months' time, you will finish your NS liability - my hope that you will get a good job and start building your life. It is never easy but no one says it is difficult either.

Allah SWT will provide if you ask. Allah SWT will give if you persist. Be a good Muslim - such is the requirement of us men.

To A - you are the baby of the family. The jewel of the family. It is obvious that among 4 of us you are the smartest in the family. However, there is much more to learn.
you will never know when you might lose a love one, cherish them while they are around & dont ignore them when they are still around. You will get my meaning if you realize how old our parents are now.

Good Friends Who have been with me thru thick & thin

And as always my number one is Suriana.Hey Girl thanks for the long years of friendship. This is the best gift that i can ever have. I do wish you have more time for me though~

I have renewed friendship with Surjali Aslah. Another good friend.

Not forgetting the kind friends from NSS who have given me endless support.

The lovely FB friends.

My lovable Kak Nurul

Great new acquaintance from FB - Dayang Nira....

Not forgetting colleagues who have been there with me all the time for the past 5-8 years of my working life.

Life is a never ending journey. At each crossroads, we come across different directions we can take. Our choice is always influenced by the people that we love.

I hope my choice is in direction of Allah SWT. It is in my hope that He leads me on to the right path. I am thankful for what it has been for the past year. The road has been smooth so far and i hope it would remain that way for the subsequent years - Insya Allah.

Ya Rabb,
Hear my prayers,
From your humbled servant,
Serving his Lord.

Ya Rabb,
Hear my thoughts,
Deep in my heart,
Heartache of a son,
Wishing for relief

Ya Rabb,
Feel my pain
deep in my soul
worrying for the siblings,
Wishing for solution

Ya Rabb,
Bless them all,
Bless us All,
We hold on tight,
to the rope of righteous.

Ya Rabb,
Bless those who prays to You,
Reward those who seek You,
Be with those who remembers You,

My thanks to you God.
For letting me journey so far.
May You let me go further,
Till the youthful skin sag,
Till the eyes turn blue,
Till the hair turns white.
Only You can grant this wish of mine.

Amin.

Selamat Tinggal

2010-10-05T22:32:00.000+08:00

Amat dukacita untuk saya umumkan bahawa permulaan bulan October ini , saya kehilangan beberapa individu:

1. Mommy Linda atau nama sebenar Amir Bin Haron yang meninggal dunia pada 2hb October 2010 jam 2.35 pagi.

2. Mrs Lee Kuan Yew - isteri kepada Menteri Pembimbing Mr Lee Kuan Yew pada hari yang sama.

Nampaknya tahun ini lebih ramai yang meninggalkan kita - tidak seperti tahun tahun sebelumnya.

SoundMadness!

2010-09-19T16:53:00.000+08:00

Hi Guys!

I am just helping out - those who need to rent equipments for performing in a band or even a space for jamming, do contact me aidil_edzwan@hotmail.co.uk!

Dont worry, price negotiable! :)

Thank you!

Aidil Edzwan

Lovely updates for Raya !

2010-09-19T00:51:00.000+08:00

Salam AidilFitri to all!

I am sorry as i have been a bit too lazy to update my blog recently. Piccies updates, as usual at my blog. You can see my gorgeous picture together with my lovely sister up there on the main page :)

Today went visiting my youngest aunt (mom's sister) and my nenek Rahimah (as i understand it, should be granny's 2nd or 3rd cousin from mom's side)! :) I m very fond of her since i was a child and till this day i respect her very much.

Anyway, today someone posed me this question which i find it a bit difficult to answer considering the relationship that we have. Anyway this is not the very first time i was posed this question.

Most of my friends or even relatives who have come to my place before will notice something different. My sisters are rarely seen or heard of. The lady of the house - my mother will ensure that the elder of the 2 sisters to prepare the drinks, served and proceed back to the room.

My youngest sister will have to cover this duty when my the other sister is married so she is still in training mode.

It took me years to actually, step forward to have that small talk with uncles, aunties, cousins or even dad's friends etc. From young i been trained not to get involved in adult's talk - "orang tua berbual jangan suka mendengar or menyampuk" i think i was informally allowed to when i reached 22 then my parents invite me to join them for drinks when any elders came over.

Even then, the same principle applies when we go visiting. We are to keep quiet, not to speak in English, eat properly, dont create a mess - applies to spilling drinks or play with the displays items - in others dont be an irritant.

I think among the 4 of us, my brother would get the most punishment - he was the youngest then so a bit manja lah :)

if we ever create a nuisance - mother will give us a pinch on our thigh right there and then and i have to control my face otherwise i sure cry ok~ or a good stare that implies "balik umah nanti kau mesti kena".

Hence since i was a child, i have always been labelled a good kid ok~ mothers loveee me coz i dont make a racket at people's house.

Nowadays, i notice even among the most educated children, be it young or teens do not seems to have this automatic respect for their parents. I m not a parent neither i am married but i think you dont need to be married to teach children manners right?

I am aware that technology is very advance and with facebook and twitter apps on IPhone, we MUST actually look at the phone every single time there is a notification for a comment or a message. Seriously, even if we are in a guest house? i mean if i do that in front of my parents i get a earful when i reach home!

I am sure that parents value the "open relationship" that they have with their children and some parents allow children to speak up their mind BUT that applies between the children and the parents and it is not automatically applies to the extended family or any other elders.

I am fairly certain that some of my friends who are parents may get themselves offended and will blacklist my from ever coming to my future invites or watever parties i may throw. This post is not meant to be offensive. It is a reflection of proper decorum and behaviour expected from a child - if it is still baby and below schooling age, i can understand when they throw tantrums - but tantrum from a teenager??? i dont like that alright!

Take for example, a child who is being dragged to go to someone's house for hari raya and showed sour face thru out the whole entire duration. I mean that is not a good behaviour, think of the host. The host will be in a situation if she is supposed to talk to you or ignore you. As a child, give your parents some face also - otherwise people might think how you were taught by your parents.

Avoid speaking loudly when in guest house. Guests should maintain their voice and behaviour. For a girl, it is best if she keep quiet and for the boys too - talk when asked otherwise shut up and maintain the posture. Keep your cool and dont lose the smile.

Hosts should avoid asking and comparing children too - in terms of educational standards etc. this is hari raya dont talk about study can? why must compare ah...u very good next time u take over their time table lah...doesnt mean we stopped learning the moment we stopped schooling ok~

The best questions to ask a child is - how's raya, meaning of raya to their perspective, how are they, happy? then proceed to talk about school work. That's how u gain their trust.

whatever it is, all this lesson must be taught from young. I had experience all that and trust me it helps a lot by keeping quiet most of the time. I rather my children keep quiet than to embarrass me. they can join the conversation later, when they are older and can think better.

so now, if they dont listen how? it is not too late - just show them the cane. :)

Ulasan Ramadan

2010-09-09T06:29:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum,

Ramadan adalah bulan untuk umat Islam, berpuasa selama sebulan menahan lapar dan dahaga. Tetapi selain itu ia juga adalah bulan mulia yang limpahnya pahala pahala yang di ganjarkan dari Allah SWT kepada umat Islam. Rugilah kita kalau sepanjang bulan ini kita tidak sama sama merebut peluang ini. Hanya sebulan sahaja kita ada untuk bertungkus lumus merebut pahala dan pahala pahala ini ganjarannya lebih dari apa yang kita boleh lakukan sepanjang hayat.

Akhirnya sampai juga kita ke penghujung ramadan. Sebak rasa di dada saya masih ada lagi dan tahun ini juga saya berazam untuk fikirkan apa yang membuat saya sebak sangat.

Puasa adalah rukun Islam yang ke 3. Pada bulan ini juga 3 dari 5 perkara rukun Islam di jalankan serentak - Solat 5 waktu, puasa & membayar zakat. Selain zakat fitrah, kepada mereka yang berkemampuan harus melakukan zakat harta. Sebagaimana saya pernah menyatakan di blog saya dan juga di facebook, bahawa tidak masuk akal jika kita wajib berpuasa sebulan tapi tidak solat. Semakin umur kita meningkat semakin dekat kita menghampiri kubur - jadi perlukah kita mempersoalkan perkara yang wajib? Kalau tidak pergi terawih itu memang hak anda tetapi hak Allah SWT ialah kewajipan bersolat 5 waktu sehari. Dan seperti biasa kata kata nasihat ini dari saya ada juga membuat orang kurang selesa tapi tak mengapa, saya tetap berdoa semoga di buka pintu hatinya untuk di tunjukkan ke jalan yang benar - itu lebih afdal dari saya memaki hamun orang tak tentu pasal :)

Bulan ini juga di ujinya hati dan perasaan saya sekali lagi bila perkara perkara lalu di timbulkan lagi. Semua orang mempunyai sejarah dan kesilapan masing masing tapi ini tidak bermakna kita tidak boleh maju ke hadapan kerana kesilapan ini semua. Saya tahu silap diri saya dan saya akui dosa saya dengan Allah SWT. Tetapi, perlukah di aibkan seseorang kerana kesilapan lama nya? Saya rasa saya tidak perlu menjawab kerana sudah terang di nyatakan dalam Al Quran mengenai pembukaan aib seseorang di dunia ini di balas setimpalnya di akhirat juga.

Saya amat bersyukur dengan rezeki yang saya ada pada bulan ini. Semuanya di belanjakan mengikut kemampuan dan dalam keadaan moderasi. Buat pertama kali sesudah lebih dari 10 tahun, saya tersentuh hati bila bonda membelikan saya sepasang baju kurung siap dengan kain samping untuk di pakai pada hari raya pertama. Ia sebagai penghargaan dari ayahanda & bonda kerana telah membawa mereka berjalan jalan ke satu tempat yang bonda telah lama ingin pergi. Alhamdulillah syukur saya di kurniakan rezeki lebih supaya dapat membawa mereka ke tempat yang mereka ingin pergi :)

Namun dalam kebahagiaan, sekali lagi saya di duga. Pak Long saya (sebelah ayahanda) meninggal pada Ramadan yang ke 25. Siapa yang mengenali saya tahu bahawa saya sudah mula tinggal sendirian. Saya sedang bersiap siap untuk ke pasar untuk membeli barang keperluan buat minggu terakhir ramadan. Jadi sewaktu saya mencapai telefon bimbit, tergerak hati untuk memeriksa jika ada panggilan yang tidak terjawab. Masa itu sudah hampir waktu pukul 7 pagi. Terdapat 2 panggilan tidak terjawab dan 2 sms - dari kedua dua adik perempuan saya dan panggilan tidak terjawab itu dari rumah orang tua saya. Saya beranikan diri untuk membaca sms itu walaupun dalam keadaan yang amat berat kerana saya tahu tiada berita baik akan di sampaikan kepada saya pada waktu itu. Rupa rupanya, di khabarkan kepada saya bahawa Pak Long saya meninggal. Saya pun terduduk dan tidak tahu apa nak buat. Terus saya telefon bonda untuk mengetahui khabar terbaru. Setelah itu baru saya dengan cepat mengemas barang barang, salin pakaian ke baju kurung putih dan telefon teksi untuk pulang ke rumah. Saya rasa, seumur hidup saya tidak akan saya lupakan perasaan yang saya alami waktu itu.

Alhamdulillah juga, saya sekali lagi berjaya mentafsir dan mengkhatam Al Quran. Sudah seperti menjadi satu kewajipan bagi diri ini untuk mengkhatam sekurang kurangnya setahun sekali. Ini bukan untuk menunjuk riak atau membangga bangga kan diri tapi saya amat berharap dapat di jadikan satu motivasi pada kawan kawan bahawa kita makin hari makin tua..jgn tunggu sampai tua, gigi dah takde baru nak belajar sebut. Kita perbetulkan dari muda jadi tidak terbawa bawa sampai ke tua. Tahun ini juga, saya dapat lakukan tahlil yang saya sendiri pimpin walaupun dengan kertas di tangan untuk apa yang hendak di baca (saya belum hafal lagi! hehe). Perkara ini membuat saya sebak sebab saya pernah suatu ketika berfikir, apa nak jadi kalau satu hari pakcik pakcik saya yang memimpin tahlil tiada lagi - siapa akan menggantikan mereka semua. Sebelum terlambat baik saya belajar dulu dan sangka saya ia mungkin berat tapi alhamdulillah, semuanya biasa sahaja cuma doa tahlil yang harus saya hafal sekali lagi. Ini mengharukan dan lebih terharu bila bonda sendiri memberikan kepercayaan kepada saya untuk memimpin tahlil sebelum Ramadan dan tahlil pada malam ini lagi untuk ahli keluarga yang sudah tiada. Saya cuma harap ada rakan rakan lelaki di sini yang boleh memimpin tahlil untuk memperbetulkan cara saya membacanya - jika ada, syukur saya kerana boleh meminta pendapat dari mereka yang sudah biasa dengan memimpin tahlil. ( saya cuma tahu dua orang sahaja rakan di sini yang boleh memimpin tahlil dan mereka saya jadikan contoh buat diri saya untuk terus kehadapan)

Buat pertama kali juga, selepas 2 ramadan, baru saya dapat bertemu kembali dengan rakan rakan dari NSS. Terutama yang saya ingin sampaikan penghargaan saya ialah Bro Fuad kerana telah banyak memberikan dorongan kepada saya walaupun dengan cara yang tidak diketahuinya. :) thank you Fuad for believing in me very much :)

Tidak lupa juga kesemua rakan baik saya walaupun ramai wanita dari lelaki kerana senantiasa memberikan kata kata perangsang sewaktu saya berduka & sama sama mendoakan kebahagiaan saya, kepada rakan rakan baru yang tidak pernah bersua dan mengenali diri saya, terima kasih saya ucapkan kerana sudi berkenalan. Kehadiran awak semua dalam hidup saya amat bermakna dan harap ia berkekalan hingga akhir hayat. Buat yang pernah saya terasa kecil hati atau mengecilkan hati awak dengan cara saya, diharapkan kita melupakan yang lalu dan maju kehadapan, belajar dari SILAP yang dilakukan dan jangan di ulangkan lagi. Baik juga dari saya dan awak :)

Maka perkara perkara di atas ini memang sebakkan diri saya kerana ia mengenai diri saya sendiri. Saya sering mempersoalkan apa yang ada pada diri saya , sudah cukupkah amalan saya, penuh tak isi iman saya, kuat tak saya beribadah pada Allah? takut saya untuk membayangkan diri semasa di soal dalam kubur. Mampukah saya menjawabnya?

Sesungguhnya Allah lebih berhak keatas diri saya.

Tiada bulan yang lebih baik dari Ramadan dan tiada insan yang lebih sempurna dari manusia. Maka dengan itu, syukurlah kita di berikan akal fikiran, tenaga dan sifat ehsan di dalam hati. Mesti sabar melalui kehidupan dan senantiasa ada sifat syukur dalam hati dalam APA jua dugaan yang diberikan kepada kita.

Sesungguhnya Allah SWT tidak akan berikan dugaan yang lebih berat dari apa yang kita mampu.

Sempena akhirnya Ramadan pada tahun ini, maka saya - Mohamed Aidil Edzwan, memohon maaf atas segala kesilapan saya melalui kata kata atau perbuatan yang mungkin telah melukakan hati awak secara sengaja atau tidak. Andaian saya telah termakan atau terminum kepunyaan awak harap dihalalkan buat diri ini. Andai kata ada juga yang ingin menuntut, sila lah mesej saya dan ingatkan kembali apa yang saya pernah terambil dahulu. Semoga awak semua berada dalam keadaan kemenangan esok dan sihat walafiat hingga ke ramadan yang akan datang sebanyak mungkin yang Allah ganjarkan kepada kita. Amin.

Dengan ini saya akhiri ulasan saya buat tahun ini.

Aidil Edzwan Yunos.

Erti Ramadan, Murtad & Keindahan Islam

2010-09-06T22:58:00.000+08:00

The title is in malay but i am much comfortable typing out in English with bits of malay and other language - aka ROJAK. We are Singaporeans after all and I am not pretending to be well educated anyway (possibly well breed) :P

Back to serious matters.

Ramadan.

It was definitely a time for self reflection and there are many thoughts playing in my mind during month of Ramadan.

One of them is definitely death. As much as i love life, i have to bow to the Allah SWT, promise that death is true. It is real. I always think that this is a good time to go perhaps not now but i hope He who knows all, will know what i really want in life before i go.

It is the month where patience is a virtue. It is definitely being emphasized and demand by the Almighty.
It is a month of prayer, a month of alms, a month of fast.

There are some who actually continue the fasting after ramadan. There is the twice a week - Mon & Thu, or in syawal 6 days of fast after the ramadan.

There are more fasting days in other months - i give you the pleasure of finding out when they are. :)

Other thoughts - of self improvement, re-emphasizing the duties of a muslim, the re-look at the way we put up our prayer, the way we read the Quran is also part of reflection.

considering that Ramadan is also nearing towards the end of the year (close lah but not that close) it is a way, is in preparation for "Hijrah". because after ramadan you will come across Haj...the greater festival and one of the tenets of Islam.

Hence if one takes the fasting month seriously, chances of his habits going off and remain thru out till Haj is high, and in turn, provides a way to Hijrah - our New Year or perhap a new US! :)

Murtad

I am sure most of you are familiar with this term.
Murtad means not to be part of something and it is heavily used in Islam - therefore it simply means to get out of Islam.

I am sure most of you wonder why i even want to touch on this topic. Reason is simple.

This afternoon, there is this friend who was a born Muslim but decides to embrace a different religion. He is of course now is a Murtad.

The thing with me is, i can accept anyone and i dont care what is your personality is like. But if i dont like i will keep quiet until you irritate me to the core. Confirm i zap you (quoting Azim) once i burst.

This friend of mine has been pestering me about his so-called new found faith gaining so called the heathens (am i?). a light in a dark tunnel or a beacon of hope. I am ok, for someone who has not even bother to practise his own born religion can easily attest to another.

To make a long story short, i snapped.

here is my actual dialogue with him on the phone:

Me: you know what, i think i have to say something now.

Friend: Oh is it about what i been telling you

Me: In a way yes.

Friend: go on.

Me: In a way i have never put you down to whatever situation you have put me in. I am one of those person who wont let stupidity spoil a friendship, I am one of those who will neither say yes or no to you depending on situation. However, i think this should end now.
I feel that i am already blessed, to be given life everyday, that every single good deed of mine being recorded on the right and all my bad deeds of mine on the left, is a constant reminder that i m being watched. The way to the heavens do not lie with 1 person to bear the entire congregration but is made responsible by each and every one of us. We abide by the rules, we get to enter, we dont, we stay out and go to the Fire.

There are many ways to avoid it and we have been advised, reminded, told to practise what is foretold and imposed to us by Allah SWT. He expect each servant to succeed in life and to strive for all types of goodness. SO MUCH MERCY COMES FROM HIM AND YET WE REMAIN STUBBORN?

For someone who was a born muslim, you never bothered to find out the true meaning of your religion, you spent hours trying to prove that all this is false but what is your intention? You want freedom? being able to do what you want? sleep with every single woman without restrictions imposed? eat whatever you like and drink what is forbidden of you?

The Quran has many answers to life; only those without ill intention will be able to reconcile and makes sense of what is being told.

Such is the long windedness of my speech (i shorten it) to him. he was definitely stunned and was kept silence.

I am tired now and will continue with the beauty of Islam tomorrow. :)

Ramadan 25

2010-09-05T06:47:00.000+08:00

We will always remember Ramadan 25th. This is the date that my Pak Long pass away.

He has been in the decline for a few years and yesterday he breath his last.

Pak Long is dad's eldest brother. That means my bond to him is stronger than my bond to my first uncle from mother's side. However the relationship has always been average.

As i mentioned before, i have never been close to dad's side but that doesnt mean i m not on talking terms lah. Pak Long has always been the quiet unassuming stern person (that's how i perceive it) therefore, he seems to be unapproachable to me :P

and seeing how his strict he is with his sons and daughter, that did scare me off - tales of him whacking his sons (relate to me when we were still children :P )

However, Pak Long is still a blood relative and i paid him the respect that he definitely deserve.

As soon as I arrived, i went to the bed where his body lay shrouded in the typical batik cloth. I requested my youngest uncle to remove the cover so i can see his face.

I was composed on seeing that. As Dad came earlier hence he was busy making funerals arrangements.

I sat on his left and began reciting Surah Al-Fateha followed by Yasin. I left the bed to allow others to do the same and i went to the hall and continue with Al Rahman and Furqan.

Mother and my siblings continue with Yasin in the room and remain then till the body was prepared for burial.

As one of the "blood ties" it is obligatory for the final goodbye.

I spread out the pacai around him & kiss his forehead. I signalled to my siblings to do the same. The ladies decide not to do it but my bro went forward with it.

After that, i went home to put back my Quran (i brought it along) and went to An-Nur to do the Zuhur and Jenazah prayer.

Pak Long was safely buried ard 2-ish and he abides there till God give life back to us on judgement day.

I hate attending the last part of funeral when the Ustaz goes on and on about life in the grave - they called it the TalQin.

However, it is good for us to be reminded of what goes on after death so that we can truly prepare for it.

Al-Fateha to Pak Long.

PS: i did tahlil for him with my mom & 2 sisters!

Kecewa

2010-09-04T05:53:00.000+08:00

Kadangkala kita di duga dengan pelbagai perkara untuk menguji tahap kesabaran kita. Dan yang paling di rasai oleh kita ialah sakitnya yang menusuk di hati. Kebiasaannya sewaktu di kecewakan semasa bercinta.

Lagu ini khas untuk seseorang insan yang pada diriku tidak mempunyai pendirian. Ku rasa diriku yang memulakan segalanya. Takkan goyang pokok kalau tiada angin, takkan ada nya bunyi kalau ku bertepuk sebelah tangan. Tapi itu mungkin hakikatnya dan aku redha.

NSS Alumni Gathering - Iftar

2010-08-28T23:44:00.000+08:00

An idea born out by the ever diva - Siti Salamah, who later message me that she can't make it due to her mom's sickness.

It was smooth sailing thru the week until the day itself - sms after sms i received, saying they could not make it.

Sick to the core. I hate organizing an event due to this stupid irritating responds that i knew i would get. I can accept sick reasons as an excuse but one of the best reason i got was " I FORGOTTEN". One of them was quite a liar as well...let's call this person A and A is going out with the one that forgot and A can tell me that A is attending a family event. I mean..u wanna lie, lie properly..opps ramadan..puas hati BUKA LAH LAIN KALI!

Oh..another plastic attitude of A, Let's say A always story about B to other people. Frankly i cant stand B and to me once i cant stand people, i just write them off out of my life. A can still go on and on about B on a daily basis to me and guess what, A WENT OUT WITH B OK! Still got the cheek to ask me to reserve a seat with the other half and must WAIT for me to sms then reply. EH YOU PEOPLE YOU KNOW WHO U ARE...JUST REMOVE URSELF FROM MY FB OK? I DONT NEED YOU GUYS AROUND!

Really, i really really really feel disappointed. If this event dont matter to you, then it doesnt matter to me anymore. In future, dont you dare asked me to organize one. I will organize MY event and i sent out the invites. up to you if you wanna come or not.

I had book for 15 pax and by 3 pm i have 6 pax on the list. How embarrasing.

Anyway God is kind, Esmarena with son & Hidir join us. There were 9 now - alhamdulillah. At least the reserved table wont look pathetic.

Pics on FB in my profile and videos below.

Enjoy!

Kemurkaan Si Jijah!

2010-08-27T05:13:00.000+08:00

KhaiLee, this clip is especially for you after the last statement that you made "MAAF JIJAH BETON!"

Ramadan Day 3

2010-08-13T06:07:00.000+08:00

All blessings comes from Him and we can only give endless thanks to Him for giving us the opportunity to create ample wealth in "pahala" during the month of Ramadan.

Why pahala?

It is a form of rezeki for Muslims during the month. It is a month of prayer, reflection & remembrance. It is the month that we Muslims have to believe that the hell gates are closed shut including all the devils that is being chained up in there and all the doors of heavens are open wide.

It is rezeki - dont you think?

As i mentioned in my previous post, it is the month where if you do something that is obligatory upon you (wajib) the rewards given is multiple times more & if you do something that is good but not obligatory upon you (sunat) it is also rewarded heavily.

It is the month of Lailatul Qadar.

Therefore i urge everyone to quickly grab all the opportunities available in this month to do good. Ignore those who doubt you as long as you dont doubt yourself. Insya Allah, all will be well. Amin.