But all to say, perhaps because I went through it, I am now so much more sensitive to the temptations to doubt than before and thus, am able to catch the Enemy “in the act.” For instance, here was a conversation  that played out in my mind today:

Holy Spirit: “This particular area of your life isn’t in line with the truth of the Gospel. You know that that particular sin isn’t glorifying to God or for your joy.”

Me: “I know. Forgive me. I know that this particular command you have given me in Your Word is for Your glory and my joy. Empower me now, by Your Spirit, to trust You at Your word and obey You.”

The Enemy: “How are you so sure that this is God’s Word?”

At which point, I proceeded to extinguish the firey darts of the Enemy with the many arguments I learned from many different places.

But, more than anything, I was taken aback by this seeming link between my sinful desire and intellectual doubts. That is, why is it that right when I agree with the Spirit that a particular sin is sin, right alongside it, there’s this temptation to doubt the veracity of Christianity? Hmm.

Thoughts:

1. I’m reminded of this verse: “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” – Jeremiah 17:9

2. And this verse: “The serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the LORD God had made. One day he asked the woman, “Did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden?” – Genesis 3:1. I knew that other voice to doubt God’s Word sounded familiar…….

God, save me from my own heart and from the Enemy.

14 And he called the people to him again and said to them, “Hear me, all of you, and understand: 15 There is nothing outside a person that by going into him can defile him, but things that come out of a person are what defile him.”

17 And when he had entered the house and left the people, his disciples asked him about the parable. 18 And he said to them, “Then are you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a person from outside cannot defile him, 19 since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled? (Thus he declared all foods clean.)

20 And he said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him. 21 For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, 22 coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. 23 All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person. – Mark 7:14-23

Richard Mellick, in his commentary on Colossians writes: “The cause of our sinfulness is not our evil deeds; [rather] our evil deeds come from our sinfulness.”

Observations:

1. It’s so easy to fall back into the mindset that “I am sinful because I do bad things” when, in actuality, it should be “I do bad things because I am sinful.”

2. The former mindset, namely, the “I am sinful because I do bad things” causes me to repent only at the surface-level. That is, because I think that the main problem is my sinful behavior (and not my heart), my response is merely to modify my behavior and manage my behavioral sins.

3. The latter mindset, however, namely that “I do bad things because I am sinful” forces me to repent at a deeper level. That is, when I “do bad things,” I recognize that the issue is with my heart, and therefore, I stand firm in my standing with Christ and not “shift from the hope of the gospel that I heard” (Col. 1:23). Then, I proceed to, “by the Spirit, put to death the deeds of the body.”

4. On an unrelated note, this is yet another reason to have confidence in the Word of God. That is, this teaching by Jesus is so absolutely counter-intuitive.

Winston Smith – How can I strengthen my weak faith? from CCEF on Vimeo.

00:27 The importance of not making too strong of a connection between strong faith and positive feelings/emotions.

01:15 Importance of thinking of faith, not primarily in terms of our feelings, but an act of turning to God in whatever we     feel.

01:28 So, then, what does it mean to act in faith?

03:08 Where else can we find “reasons for faith”?

We need not be discouraged by the problem of supposedly unanswered prayer. I say “supposedly” because I challenge the supposition.

While God has not bound himself to hear unbelievers’ prayers, his promises to answer the prayers of his own children are categorical and inclusive. It must then be wrong to think that a flat no is ever the whole of his response to reverent petitions from Christians who seek his glory and others’ welfare.

The truth must be this: God always acts positively when a believer lays a situation of need before him, but he does not always act in the way or at the speed asked for. In meeting the need, he does what he knows to be best when he knows it is best to do it.

The parable of the unjust judge shows that God’s word to his elect concerning the vindication for which they plead is “wait” (Lk 18:1-8), and he may say “wait” to other petitions as well. Christ’s word to Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness,” when Paul had sought healing for his thorn in the flesh (2 Cor 12:7-9), meant no, but not simply no. Though it was not what Paul had expected, it was a promise of something better than the healing he had sought. We too may ask God to change situations and find that what he does instead is to give us strength to bear them unchanged. But this is not a simple no; it is a very positive answer to our prayer.

I remember a scene from my childhood. As my eleventh birthday approached I let my parents know by broad hints that I wanted a full-size bicycle. They thought it was too soon for that and therefore gave me a typewriter, which was in fact the best present and became the most treasured possession of my boyhood. Was not that good parenthood and a very positive answer to my request for a bicycle? God too allows himself to improve on our requests when what we ask for is not the best.

1. Compensating for introversion is not an option. Leaders can’t lead without dealing with people in a multitude of settings. If I am not willing to compensate, I should not be a leader.

2. I must practice LBWA, leadership by walking around. I can’t stay confined to the comforts and seclusion of my office. I must be seen by employees. I must be seen by constituents and customers. I must travel to places to develop relationships.

3. It often behooves me to explain to others that I am introvert so my quietness and reticent nature are not misinterpreted to be lack of interest or unfriendliness. On more than one occasion, that explanation has helped people immensely in understanding what I say or don’t say, or to understand better my body language.

4. When possible, I need to keep meetings short. The longer a meeting, the more I get drained. Many employees with whom I work have learned that lesson. I also notice that extroverts tend to organize long and tedious meetings. They enjoy them. I don’t. I really don’t.

5. As much as possible, I try to have an extrovert with me when I’m in public or group settings. That extrovert can carry the conversation. I can nod my head and smile.

6. I need to practice self-awareness constantly. In that regard, I need and have someone I trust to speak to me truthfully. If I appear to be acting like an uninterested jerk, that friend does not hesitate to tell me. It’s painful, but I need to know how others perceive me.

7. I must schedule downtime. If I don’t recharge my batteries often, I become a useless leader. But I can’t succumb to the temptation to perpetuate my downtime. I must return to all of the principles stated above.

Click here to read the entire post. The beginning paragraphs are interesting and encouraging because he describes exactly how introverted he is. It’s good to know I’m not the only one