I bought the most beautiful book the other day – ‘On a Beam of Light – A Story of Albert Einstein’. It’s by Jennifer Berne  with pictures by Vladimir Radunksy.

It’s that lovely combination of just the right words set against gorgeous illustrations that make the best children’s books so enchanting and memorable.

On a Beam of Light tells the story of Einstein’s life from a small child who didn’t speak until he was two or three, to the genius we all think of when we hear his name.

Jennifer Berne read 50 books about Einstein to research this story. She’s somehow managed to distil all that material (some of which most have been pretty heavy going) into around 48 pages. And yet she has still captured the essence of the man, how he saw the world, and what he achieved.

Beautifully and simply written, it’s a master class in writing economic but entertaining copy, aimed at a particular audience. I wasn’t surprised to discover Berne is a former advertising copywriter. She says it was, “a great way to learn how to get into people’s minds and write short, focused, purposeful and entertaining pieces – in one-page and 30-second formats.”

Experts always hold up The Sun (newspaper that is. The sun would be rather hot and a bit too big to hold) as the best example of choosing the right words and style to draw in your audience.

While I understand where they’re coming from, I just can’t bring myself to have anything to do with it for oh so many reasons.

I’d much rather look to examples such as ‘On a Beam of Light’ that do a splendid job. And respect their audience.

Give yourself a treat – go out and buy it!

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.” Albert Einstein.

I can imagine the visitor’s incredulity as first they spot the mistake, then double-check to confirm that, yes, not only has someone misspelt ‘lys’ as in fleur de lys, but they’ve compounded their mistake by incorrectly inserting an apostrophe. And in a museum too…

So out comes the ballpoint, the offending word is angrily struck through, and the correct version is scrawled above.

Actually, it wasn’t the only mistake I spotted on the information boards as I wandered around – not that I was looking for errors – the enchanting collection held my attention. I’m not going to mention the name of the museum because it’s a little gem and they do everything else so well

Possibly like the person who took pen to board , I somehow imagine museums are above this sort of mistake, or at the very least, they have a thorough proofreading process before public signage gets printed.

I guess the truth is the museum probably has an small team with an impossibly heavy workload. And certainly not enough money rectify this sort of mistake by getting the boards reprinted.

It’s a rather harsh lesson in the necessity of thorough proofreading to save embarrassment, maintain a professional image, and save money.

Well,l I don’t know that simplifying language would promote world peace but I’d be the first to admit that the English language can be a nightmare. I have no idea how people from other countries ever get to grips with its quirkiness and complexity. And then there’s our rich and varied regional dialects…

When I was growing up in the North-West, Mum had a fruit and veg shop. How I dreaded working there on Saturdays and in school holidays especially when I was confronted with customers with a heavy Lancashire brogue.

“Five parndapraters please,” requested one chap. “Uh?” was my response. (Don’t forget, I was a sulky teenager). Someone stepped in to translate that he was asking me for five pounds of potatoes. Ah. Of course. Silly me.

I discovered not long ago that Dad and one of his workmates, Frank, had kept a book of old North-West words. I felt very honoured when he solemnly presented it to me for safe-keeping.

Here are a couple of my favourites. Please note, the spellings are probably Dad and his mate Frank’s interpretations.

Ahter Flunther

Unbelievably this translates (according to Dad and Frank) as, ahem, not working. I can only imagine that ‘ahter’ derives from ‘out of’ as in ‘out of order’. As to the origins of ‘flunther’ I have no idea.

Bieyhultam

Um, that would be boiled ham.

Baht

Without. I don’t think the North-West can claim this as it’s mentioned in the famous Ilkley Moor song of course – “On Ilkley Moor Baht ‘At” (They don’t write them like that any more. Thank goodness).

Chauve

To irritate

Clempted

Hungry

Demick

Rubbish

Fettle

To repair

Mither (pronounced ‘myther’)

I love this one. It means to constantly ask someone something or to nag them, as in “stop mithering me.” It can also mean you’re a bit stressed as in ‘I was reet mithered abart it.”

It’s one of those words that really expresses what you’re feeling when you say it.

Mee-maw

Another favourite. It means to gesticulate wildly at someone. Who will no doubt feel very mithered by your antics.

Powfagged

Fed up.

Thutch

Heave or put in effort

Tranclyments

I adore this one! It means belongings or your bits and pieces.

Warch

Ache as in…

Yed warch

Headache.

So there you go. I’m not sure they’ll never promote world peace but they may help you make yourself understood by people of a certain age in the North-West of England. That would be my Dad and Frank then.

I’d love to hear from you with your favourite regional words and sayings!

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The voiceover is followed by images of families doing lots of fun stuff outdoorsy together set to one of my favourite tracks – ‘Sweet Disposition’  by Australian band The Temper Trap.

The ad ends with an excellent strapline: “Memories start here.” So far, so good.

I hate to be picky (really, I do) but can you really inherit a memory? Surely, memories are individual and personal, and based on experience. Otherwise wouldn’t it be a bit like Bladerunner, you know when the nasty Tyrell Corporation implants other people’s memories into the ‘replicants’ they’ve created?

You can read or listen to someone else’s memories of course, but surely the point of the ad is that a Center Parcs holiday creates lasting memories for the people who experienced it. You had to be there in other words.

I know that Adland stretches language and grammar – and often to good effect, but this is a stretch too far for me.

Great images, great strapline, and of course that glorious soundtrack through!

Dealing with journalists can be tricky – especially if you’re not used to it. I asked Nicky Rudd, seasoned PR practitioner and managing director of Padua Communications, to share her experience. 

In my nearly 20 years of PR experience, the industry has massively changed. However, there are some key things to know when dealing with the media that have remained the same and will do so until the end of time. Here are my top 5 most important considerations when dealing with the media.

1.     Before you do any media outreach or start trying to contact journalists, do some research and find out the press day of each publication and what lead times they are working to. For instance, if you are dealing with a weekly publication, the news they cover will happen in that week. For regular features, you are looking at around six weeks before publication to get yourself included. Also, if you find out when press day is, you are more likely to be able to plan your story. Journalists never want to hear from PRs or companies on the day they go to press and they can be fierce. Beware, you will get short shrift and you will deserve it! You are more likely to be successful if you pitch your story after the trauma of a press deadline.

2.     Check the details of a publication and make sure you don’t assume. A journalist friend of mine who worked on a weekly couldn’t believe his ears when a PR person kept referring to his title as a monthly publication, especially when it had ‘week’ in its title. No friends made there and so not a good pick up for the client!

3.     Who you should be contacting? Are you hoping your story will make it to the news pages or are you looking to get into a regular feature? Depending on which, you will be talking to different people with different roles, timings and needs. Once you know these details, you should have a better understanding of when to contact them. And when not to!

4.     Have you checked your press release? How easy is it to find out the information and have you proofread it for typos? We have a policy of never sending a release out unless a second pair of eyes has looked at it. Mistakes in releases are one of the fastest guarantees to get your release binned. Make sure your release is formatted correctly. Does it include contact details? Don’t send the release as a PDF. Journalists want to be able to get the information, easily edit it, and use it in its simplest form so Word wins all the way. Read through the content and ensure it’s easy for the journalist to get the details they will need quickly. Also ensure you have a decent 300 dpi image to go with your story. Don’t underestimate the use of a good image!

5.     Don’t do everything by email. Use the medium used by the journalist to contact them. This might mean you are emailing, tweeting, phoning and emailing again. Journalists are swamped with information (some get about 400+ releases a day!) so don’t expect to get coverage automatically. Definitely don’t ring and ask the journalists if they are using your release. Think about what else you can offer them that would be an extra bonus to the story. A briefing with a senior researcher or a chief product developer? Are you giving them an exclusive?

Think carefully about the relationship you forge with journalists. A client of mine was always quite tetchy when a junior journalist was sent along to cover an International press briefing. Within five years, this junior journalist had become editor. If you can think in a wider sense of what the reader of the publication will get out of the story, a journalist will give you some credit for understanding their area of interest and what makes a decent story for them.

Just a couple of other quick pointers, you won’t get to see the copy or editorial before it goes to print, so make sure, if you’re speaking to a journalist, you have thought about your messages and wherever possible, make sure you have had some media training. Forearmed is forewarned. The best pieces of coverage have been strategically thought about, planned and the client is prepared.

Padua Communications runs regular workshops on dealing with the media and copywriting for press releases. Check www.paduacommunications.com for further info or give us a ring on 01932 213140.

Robert Stubbings  a former advisor manager with Business Link South East, has just sent me a link to a post that gives a slightly different angle on the relationship of quietness to productivity.

It’s by Roberta Matuson, CEO, Human Resource Solutions based in the USA and is titled ‘The link between quietness and productivity’

Roberta points out that it’s often the quiet people who are the most productive and she gives some great examples of why she believes that to be so.

While it’s not exactly related to my post it does show how powerful a force quietness can be. Definitely food for thought and I hope you enjoy reading it.

Thanks to Robert for sending it to me and to for Roberta of course for agreeing to let me use it.

I’ve written the copy and have the translators lined up. On the surface it’s a relatively simple task: just a few paragraphs of copy to introduce and explain a service.

But the point of the localisation service is to make sure that copy that’s been translated into English flows and reads well. It needs to get the message across and engage the audience too. So, of course I need to be sure that happens with my copy in each of the languages it’s translated in to.

Going through this process got me thinking about book translations.  We take it a bit for granted when we read classics like Tolstoy’s War and Peace and Anna Karenina, Flaubert’s Madame Bovary or more modern books such as Blindness by Jose Saramago.

But how on earth does a translator capture the essence and poetry of the original? How do we know that the translator isn’t more talented than the author? And what about those words and phrases that only exist in the original language and not in English?

I decided to ask writer, editor, and publisher, Rachel Giles.Translation is an art, not a science. True, it may be easy to translate frequently used phrases from one language to another, and sometimes it can appear to be a mechanical process. But what if you’re trying get across concepts, ideas, or be really creative with communication? What if the author is using similes or metaphors, and is, dare I say it, having fun with language – with fiction, for example?

Words, and the ideas behind them (and the people who write them) are, thank goodness, much more subtle and far more complex. In fiction, it’s never as straightforward ‘this word means that’. If that were the case, computers or websites would have put translators out of work by now.

So do translators need to be good writers themselves? I would say its essential. Tim Parks, a writer of both fiction and non-fiction (his novel The Server has just published), is also a highly respected translator. In his book Translating Style, he looks at a range of fiction by English Modernist authors, and asks whether it is actually translatable. Take this paragraph by D.H. Lawrence, in Women in Love, for example:

‘In a few moments the train was running through the disgrace of outspread suburbia. Everybody in the carriage was on the alert, waiting to escape. At last they were under the huge arch of the station, in the tremendous shadow of the town. B shut himself together – he was in now.’

What’s ‘the disgrace of outspread suburbia’? And how do you render ‘B shut himself together’, and ‘he was in now’? Lawrence uses language in idiosyncratic and surprising ways; this is what makes him a great writer.

And this, too, creates the challenge of translation. Parks, describing his book’s main argument, says, “While it’s fairly easy to translate content and standard mannerisms, when the meaning of a text lies in the distance between itself and what the reader expected, then it is difficult for the translator to follow.”

To have a chance of succeeding, a translator must also have a fascination with the country, culture and (particularly if it’s a literary piece) the other works of the writer being translated – or at least understand their style and idiom so intimately that they can attempt the daunting task of conveying it in another language.

Recently I worked on a non-fiction book where the author wrote in Italian. His writing was beautiful. All involved were concerned not to lose the elegance of his style. In Italian, he asked rhetorical questions, wrote long, flowing sentences, and, as his passion about the subject emerged, made frequent exclamations.

It was difficult to translate the passages where he waxed lyrical. What reads as lovely and true in Italian can sound clipped and almost comical in English if translated literally. A little toning down was needed. But I did want to ensure that the imagery and sparkle in the language remained. Ultimately it was a compromise: which passages were key, and which images just had to keep their flavour? The result is always something of a compromise.

You can easily spot a bad translation. The ones where you don’t see the joins, especially in fiction, are rare works of real genius. At this level the translator submerges him- or herself in the author’s vision, somehow fashioning a new, slightly different, work of art.

A book that does this for me is Jose Saramago’s novel Blindness. The language in this comic and frightening parable is highly innovative, telling the story of what happens when everyone in an unnamed town is struck blind. Sentences are up to a page long. There’s no punctuation to show who is speaking – dialogue is just one utterance after another, separated by commas. Astonishingly, you can follow it; even more astonishingly, this tide of language is gripping. That’s firstly down to the incredible writing, but that it works in English is thanks to the masterful translation.

Translators can be as talented with language as the author they’re working with. Even if they didn’t create the original work, they need to enter the author’s mind to do it well. More often than not, they’re unsung heroes. But when they translate a work successfully, they unwrap a precious gift for a whole new readership.

I’m rubbish at shutting out noise – especially when it’s intermittent. During the silences I find myself waiting for it to start up again. So I’ve abandoned my little writing hut in the garden and retreated indoors where it’s much quieter.

I really wish I could find a way to block out noise and wondered if other writers find it so difficult, and if so what they do to get around it.

Friend and fellow copywriter Sarah Turner, of Turner Ink, works in a busy studio – something I just couldn’t do. So how does she focus on writing?

“I stick on my noise reduction Sony headphones and crank up the classical music to get in the zone,” she says. “Also the headphones act like a ‘do not disturb’. So no-one comes and talks to me!”

Carole Seawart, another copywriter friend works from home like me but has a different set of noise distractions.

“The main sources of noise where I live are loud goods trains hurtling past (short-lived noise, so I just get up and close the window) and the gardener, who looks after our complex, using his electric hedge trimmer and leaf blower.

“Those two are really intrusive so I shut all the windows and try and block to block the sound out. (His leaf blower is going as I write this!)

“If there is work going on in our block, like a neighbour having a new bathroom fitted which involves loud banging and drilling, then I usually decamp to a café or try to fix up meetings.

“A friend blocks out noise by putting on headphones and listens to the sound of the sea.”

Mmm. I can’t write with music in the background so I can’t use Sarah’s method, although noise reduction headphones worked for me when our next door neighbour had the builders in. And I’d find it impossible to work in a café, so Carole’s approach doesn’t work for me either.

Rachel Giles, freelance arts writer and neighbour (not the noisy one), finds meditation useful.

“I took a mindfulness course recently, and it really does help to train the mind not to run off after every distraction, like a dog chasing a rabbit. I try to do a ‘three-minute breathing space’ a few times a day, which clears out the mental clutter and makes me less susceptible to immediate distractions, whether they’re noise, worries, or thoughts about what I’m having for tea. It helps me to focus on the here and now, and that can only be helpful for writing.

“Mindfulness also helps you to develop a different attitude to noise. You learn to notice sounds come and go, but don’t judge them as good or bad; they just are what they are. But of course, if I’m trying to write and the noise is impossible, the only solution for me would be to head somewhere else.

“When I’m really excited by an idea, I’ll get into ‘flow’ mode, and the words are flying thick and fast. At times like that, I don’t really hear anything at all. It doesn’t happen every day (I wish!) but when it does, a lot of noise fades into the background.”

So would meditation train me to block out distractions I wondered? I asked business coach Kish Modasia of Lead Your Life. Kish works with individuals and teams helping them to make a big impact from small changes.

I know that meditation is a big part of her life and I asked her if she uses it to block out external interferences. She made a very interesting comment:

“The sounds around us are what we refer to as noise, however the greater challenge is the noise of our thoughts. Does the mind ever go quiet?”

That’s so true. And unfortunately, those little voices in my head lead me to another distraction totally of my own making: procrastination!

What do you do to block out noise or other distractions? Or do you find that you need a buzzy environment to be productive?

In the meantime, for those of us who need peace and quiet, here are some tips from Kish to help us to ‘get in the zone’ as Sarah would say.

Kish’s meditation tips

“There is no right or wrong way to meditate or quieten the mind. You will find your own way. Trust and work with that.

Start with one minute or two.

Consciously concentrate on your breath.

Slowly breathe in and breathe out.

Notice the quiet and silence.

Increase with time.

My suggestion is do this three times a day and make meditation your medication.

Have no expectation and no outcome. Just relax.

If the mind wanders, as it does, just focus back on the breath.

Other ways you may prefer include repeating a word like OM, Lord, Oneness  - whatever appeals to you.

Or you may prefer to listen to a guided meditation.

Try different things to find out what works best for you.

Let your aim be to relax, become quiet, raise your awareness and connect within.”

Thanks Kish!

For more on the mindfulness technique that Rachel recommended, visit http://www.bemindful.co.uk/ and the ‘three minute breathing space’ and sound-based meditations can be found at http://franticworld.com/free-meditations-from-mindfulness/

And if you have any tips on blocking out distractions – let me know.

One such small local business has come up with an inspired way to get around the ban. Take a bow Stephen Holt, owner of Focus Wear in Surbiton.

The poster in the shop window features five squares in the colours of the Olympic rings and reads:

‘Lodnon 2102 Oimplycs’

“I wanted to do an Olympic themed window,”  Stephen told me. “I’ve had endless discussions with Olympic organising committee, LOCOG, but I was getting nowhere. They told me that if I used the rings I’d be implying I was a sponsor – little old me!” he laughed.

Then on Thursday last week, Stephen, who runs the shop with his wife Sarah, had what he described as an epiphany.

“A couple of years ago someone emailed me a paragraph of text that had the letters jumbled up, yet it was still readable. I suddenly remembered it and decided to do my own take on it to get around the restrictions.

“I gave the idea to my printer later that day, and the poster was in the window by the weekend.”

Roberts dry cleaners, two doors away, is also displaying the poster and both businesses are getting a lot of attention. Photos of the shops have been tweeted by several people and have even been retweeted by Labour MP for West Bromwich East, Tom Watson.

The poster will probably get a lot more attention tomorrow when the torch relay comes to Surbiton and passes by the shops on Claremont Road in Surbiton.

I love the inventiveness of Stephen’s poster. We keep being told that the UK is staging ‘the greatest show on earth’ so why shouldn’t Stephen and other businesses be allowed to join in the celebration if they aren’t hurting the sponsors?

Stephen and his wife Sarah opened Focus Formal Wear 24 years ago. Situated at 8 Claremont Road in Surbiton, the shop specialises in menswear hire for weddings and formal occasions.

And here’s the link to the text that was the source for Stephen’s inspiration.

According to the report, hundreds of uniformed Olympics officers have been dispatched to tour the UK, checking companies to make sure they’re not ‘ambush marketing’ or illegally associating themselves with the Games at the expense of official sponsors.

Businesses have been warned that, during the Games, they are banned from using certain words in their advertising. I must admit, I’m a little baffled by some of the words on the banned list.

As the Independent points out, it’s a “highly organised mission that contrasts with the scramble to find enough staff to secure Olympic sites”.

It’s the biggest brand protection operation ever staged in the UK and legislation has been specially introduced for the London Games. It gives the officers the right to enter shops and offices and bring court action with fines of up to £20,000.

Companies such as Adidas, McDonald’s, Coca-Cola, and BP have paid large sums to be official sponsors of the Games as well as investing millions in the development and protection of their brands.  I absolutely agree that they are entitled to exclusivity and a certain amount of protection.

But seriously, can the rest of us really be prosecuted for using words such as ‘summer’ and ‘London’ in our marketing material? Yes, they really are on the banned list along with:

Games

Two thousand and twelve

2012

Twenty Twelve

Medals

Gold

Silver

Bronze

Sponsors

OK, I’m exaggerating slightly for effect: it is contextual. The Olympic Delivery Authority, who is responsible for the ‘brand police’, has supplied examples set out in handy categories.

Under ‘Property’ they give two examples of an advertisement for a block of flats – one would be allowed; the other wouldn’t:

Allowed: Stratford Mansions. 1 & 2 bedroom flats, £220,000 to £350,000; 5 minutes’ walk to Stratford International Station; next to Olympic Park; 15 minutes commute to Canary Wharf.

Banned: Simplefields Homes. An Olympic investment not to be missed! 1 and 2 bedroom flats, luxurious fittings, 5 minutes’ walk to Stratford International Station

Really? I’m sorry but I fail to see how using the word ‘Olympian’ affects the main sponsors in any way.

Or take this one aimed at pubs:

Allowed: A blackboard sign outside the Red Lion saying: ‘Watch the Olympic Games here with a cold beer… Live coverage all day.’

Banned: Brewer’s posters displayed outside the Red Lion with the message: Grogglington’s Bitter: Watch the Olympics here’

If a company rips off the Adidas logo, blatantly uses McDonald’s colours in its own design, or plagarises Coca Cola’s strapline, then yes, they should be prosecuted.

But then again, take a stroll down any of the aisles in your local supermarket and take a look at the similarities in packaging design between some of the supermarket’s own brand products and their more well-known counterparts. And yet they get away with it.

So why have the powers that be suddenly become so rigorous? And will they continue to hunt down brand theft after the Games to protect businesses as a matter of course?

Yes, the official sponsors are paying enormous amounts of money (and getting tax exemptions too of course), and yes, in part they are making the Games possible.

But I’d argue that we’re all contributing one way or another, be that in increased council tax, inconvenience and loss of revenue to business through travel disruption, and through road closures during the road events.

Surely we should be allowed to capitalise on what we keep being told is a ‘once in a lifetime opportunity’ without blatantly stealing from the main sponsors?

(Please note lack of images and carefully worded headline. I don’t want those purple clad people knocking at my door!)