According to the videographer, “Lukas says that it is better to take incidents happening during concerts easy and a little bit of humour always helps to relieve the tension.” So maybe there’s a lesson in there for us too.

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If you can’t beat ‘em…. is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!

As a reward for your patience, I think this is what they call a roman à clef:

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Housekeeping is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!

“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to release the oppressed,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

–Jesus of Nazareth (Luke 14:18–19)

January is Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month.

(You can read all about it here.)

Spiritual what, you say? Ah, that’s why we need an awareness month. Here are a few definitions to get you up to speed:

Spiritual abuse is the misuse of a position of power, leadership, or influence to further the selfish interests of someone other than the individual who needs help. Sometimes abuse arises out of a doctrinal position. At other times it occurs because of legitimate personal needs of a leader that are being met by illegitimate means. Spiritually abusive religious systems are sometimes described as legalistic, mind controlling, religiously addictive, and authoritarian. –David Henke, Watchman Fellowship

Spiritual Abuse occurs when a leader, church or a belief system, whether well intentioned or not, dominates, manipulates or castigates individuals through fear tactics, mind control, or some other psychological or emotional abuse. –Spiritual Research Network

Spiritual abuse occurs when someone in a position of spiritual authority, the purpose of which is to ‘come underneath’ and serve, build, equip and make God’s people MORE free, misuses that authority placing themselves over God’s people to control, coerce or manipulate them for seemingly Godly purposes which are really their own. –Jeff VanVonderen

You see it in cults and in mainstream churches. You see it from televangelists and pastors and elders and priests. You hear about it on the news when another child is molested by a priest or pastor. You don’t see it in the faces of the people next to you who once heard and believed that they can’t please God unless they’re good enough. It’s there too.

It’s bad because it hurts people.

It’s worse because it hurts people and tells them they deserve it.

It’s worst because it hurts people and teaches them that God does too.

I think it’s no exaggeration to say that Spiritual Abuse is arguably the one of the most pressing moral, theological, and social issues facing the church (the followers of Jesus) today. Spiritual abuse not only leaves people emotionally and psychologically devastated; it turns them away from faith in the God who could be their source of consolation and encouragement. A church that doesn’t address the realities of Spiritual Abuse leaves its message savaged and discredited, often without even realizing it. If people associate you with the hypocrites, the manipulators, the cruel, and the abusers, why should they listen to anything you have to say on any other subject–even the Gospel itself?

Though like all abuse it’s hard to quantify, statistics seem to bear out this view. A 2010 study by the Barna group revealed that tens of millions of “unchurched” people in America–4 out of every 10 adults who don’t attend church–”said they avoid churches because of negative past experiences in churches or with church people.” Guess who is the largest segment in the “unchurched” demographic? Self-identified Christians. The problem isn’t that we haven’t reached the “unchurched” with our evangelistic efforts; the problem is that we have, and we hurt them in the process. The wise words of Pogo come to mind….

The best way to learn about spiritual abuse is, as with most things, to take the time to read about it. (For a quick-and-dirty immersive experience, Provender’s “Model of Spiritually Abusive Language” is probably the most accurate primer I’ve seen of what it really looks like in practice.) As it happens, I’ve done some writing of my own on the subject. In honor of Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month, I’ve put together a list for you. First are my own articles, then are some links to other resources I’ve found helpful. Find one that looks interesting and give it a look.

Articles On Spiritual Abuse

Antidotes to Spiritual Abuse Things spiritual abusers say vs. things the Bible says. One of these things is not like the other; one of these things just doesn’t belong. (One of my most popular posts, even including the musical ones.)

How Does Jesus Love You? Love, truth, beauty, and grace help you heal. All of them are found in Jesus–the real Jesus in the Bible, that is, not the caricature some religious folks give. I went all out on this first guest post for “Quivering Daughters”, and it’s still probably my favorite thing I’ve ever written.

The Galatian Road out of Legalism The New Testament has an entire book attacking the legalistic doctrine of manipulative spiritual leaders. Here’s a handy summary. (Guest post on “The Cult Next Door.”)

Spiritual Abuse Files: The Untold Story of “Grace on a Snake”! A goofy, often-overlooked story from the Old Testament shows how to respond to a king who talked about grace but got it totally wrong. Samuel L. Jackson shows up.

Hypocriticism All the most wonderful people I know are Christians; so are all the most loathsome jerks I know. Will the real hypocrites please stand up?

Hypocriticism II: Blessed Are the Disillusioned I found a hypocrite… in my mirror. Oswald Chambers suggests that this disillusionment with hypocrisy is actually a very good thing.

You Might Be A Sadducee If…  … if you thought the Pharisees were the only nasty religious people in the New Testament. Surprise!

I Have A Sign: Answering Spiritual Abusers According to their Folly A hilarious real-life news story: Absurdist pranksters beat infamous abuser Fred “God Hates F**s” Phelps at his own game.

The Myth of the Lukewarm Christian The truth behind a familiar Scripture that abusers love to quote at you.

Godly Authority: A Flight to Topsyturvydom Spiritual abusers often make a big deal out of “godly authority.” Jesus often made a big deal out of humility and self-sacrifice. Somebody must be flying upside down.

Broken Does God want you to be broken… or does God want to heal you?

Sheep Story A few thousand years before anybody ever heard the term “Spiritual Abuse,” God described it perfectly in a poem about sheep.

The True Meaning of Christmas Trees: The Spiritual Abuse Connection A religious urban legend about the origins of the Christmas Tree winds up showing the truth about Spiritual Abuse.

Reader Question: Did Jesus Teach Legalism? Look at a couple of frequently-quoted verses and you might think He did. Behind-the-scenes Bible study tells a different story.

20 Reasons to Abandon a Bugaboo So you want to abandon religion because you object to all the cruelty and abuses in its name? Great! Did you know you’re agreeing with the Bible?

Turn Your Eyes Upon… “If you focus on Jesus, you’ll become like Jesus; if you focus on worldliness—even in order to avoid it—you’ll become worldly.”

The Bondage of Betrothal A sure-fire sign of a cult or high-control group is that they say they have authority over whom you decide to marry. What does the Bible say?

Garments of Salvation Legalist doctrinaires like to make rules about “biblical principles for modesty.” What the Bible really says about clothing may completely change the way you read it.

What It’s All About An anonymous reader’s tear-jerking comment on “Garments of Salvation” reveals why it’s so important to avoid destructive doctrines before it’s too late.

Ashamed of the Gospel? A Case Study of Teen Mania and Works-Based Doctrine I take a look at a controversial youth ministry, Teen Mania’s Honor Academy, to see how a professing Christian group’s doctrine can reveal whether it actually believes in the Gospel or in a works-based relationship with God. (Spoiler: Turns out Teen Mania belongs decisively in the latter category.)

Great Resources from Other People

Pure Provender An exhaustive collection of Spiritual Abuse links and resources. This will keep you busy for quite a while, but it’s probably the best place to start on the Internet.

Spiritual Abuse Awareness Official website of Spiritual Abuse Awareness (month and otherwise). Spread the word.

ICSA International Cultic Studies Association. Exactly what it says on the tin.

Quivering Daughters Hope and healing for women who grew up in the controlling doctrine of the “patriarchy” movement. Don’t miss Hillary McFarland’s beautiful and harrowing book of the same title. (There’s a chapter by me in there too.)

Recovering Alumni Documenting and exposing the many abuses of a major Evangelical Christian youth organization. Some things will curl your hair; other things will give you hope.

Gospel Masquerade Abuses addressed from a Charismatic perspective by a former member of the IHOP cult.

Spiritual Abuse Recovery Resources from Jeff VanVonderen, author of The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse.

Recovery From Abuse ”A practical introduction for pastors and other religious professionals.” If you’re a pastor, go read this site right now. If you’re not, forward it to any pastors you know. It’s that good. (Start with this post if you’re in a hurry–Things a Church Can Do.)

How Cults Work Informative overview of several common deceptive techniques that cults (religious and otherwise) use to manipulate people.

Under Much Grace A wealth of authoritative information on abusive and cult-like practices within “biblical” Christianity.

Recovering Grace Analyzing, exposing, and finding healing from the pervasive teachings of Bill Gothard (Institute of Basic Life Principles).

Church Exiters A good book and website on how to get out of an abusive church environment. Recommended in the comments by Dr. Barb Orlowski. Thanks!

Spiritual Abuse Must Stop New! An impassioned essay by popular blogger Matthew Paul Turner, urging everyone to treat this issue as the serious problem it is.

I’m sure I’m leaving out a lot of good resources. This will get expanded from time to time, so feel free to add your suggestions and favorites in the comments.

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5. Clean

Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!

Since then, it seems to have achieved a wee bit of notoriety. The Colorado ACDA describes it (on their Fall 2010 list of “Repertoire Suggestions”– I’m honored!) like so:

This is a jaunty Irish tune set with interweaving lines.  Most of this setting is just 2 parts, but there are spots where it expands to 3 and 4 parts.  Humorous text with lots of “diddley-dowdle” nonsense.

It turns out that some people liked it enough to record it. The Minnesota Valley Men’s Chorale, conducted by Steven O. Boehlke, has an MP3 on their website of a very fine and rousing performance that was apparently presented to the ACDA. (That stands, I should have mentioned, for American Choral Directors Association, which is just as big a deal as it sounds.) This one will definitely go in my portfolio. Thanks!

So far, however, my absolute favorite performance that I’ve heard is this hilarious rendition by the Marist Quartet — Messrs. Hayes Callaway, Branden Finch, Clark Helman, and Brendan Hickey, according to YouTube – with impeccable comic timing and some facial reactions and byplay that completely cracked me up. Brilliant work, gents! Have a watch:

Last but not least, I can’t leave out this one, performed by a choir that unfortunately isn’t identified in the YouTube description (help me out, anyone?). The audio is slightly muffled, but it’s noteworthy for the remarkable hats modeled by the singers. I guess this is a good arrangement to wear hats to.

Very few things make composers happier than hearing excellent performances of their music by musicians who are clearly enjoying themselves. My warmest thanks to everyone who’s performed “Mick McGuire.” Those interested in using it for their own choir or ensemble may purchase the sheet music through Alliance Music Publications (AMP 0792) or your local music store.

If you’ve performed any of my music or know someone who has, please seek help– I mean, send me a link to the recording, and I’ll feature it on my website.

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“Mick McGuire” Performed by Gents in Remarkable Hats is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!

Hey, everybody! It’s the last day of Kistchmas, so let’s play Holiday Mashup! Here’s how it works: You take the Nativity story and something else that’s nothing at all like the Nativity story, and you put them together and see what you get!

Ready? Go!

The prophets fortell the chosen one
Who makes my bathtime lots of fun…

What child is this, who, laid to rest,
has a corncob pipe and a button nose and two eyes made out of coal?

And she shall give birth to a son, and shall call his name Gerald McBoing-Boing.

And ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a fishbowl.

“What a lovely baby, Mr. Frodo!” “Thanks, Sam; he’s so precious.”

And lo, faith and begorrah, three wise men came bearing gifts of gold, frankincense, and me lucky charms….

And so, after defeating the Great Pumpkin, the Easter Bunny brought the baby Jesus to Santa and the Angel, and they put him in the manger, and… and if he sees his shadow it will be winter for six more weeks. The end.

If that isn’t enough holiday cheer, may I recommend The Year Kenny Loggins Ruined Christmas by the sublimely funny Hyperbole and a Half:

And so, as Tiny Tim observed, “God help us, every one!”

Merry Kitschmas to all and to all a good night.

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Tacky Nativity Scenes 3: Electric Boogaloo is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!

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5. Tales from the Kitsch: More Tacky (and Creepy!) Nativity Scenes

Tacky Nativity Scenes 2: The Kitsch that Stole Christmas is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!

A year or two ago at Kitschmastime, inspired by the Crescat, I delved into the world of tacky nativity scenes. I don’t know what I was thinking. But, like all bad ideas whose time has come, it turned out there was far too much material to use in one year.

So, speaking of bad ideas, we now proudly present: Tacky Nativity Scenes, the Squeaquel!

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Who is he in yonder stall? Who? Who? Who?

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This shepherd brought to you by Squick-E-Cheese’s: Where a kid can be a trauma case.

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Unto us a child is hatched.

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This one gets the seal of approval. (Get it? Get it? Seal? I’ll be here all night, folks.)

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Are these nativity scenes kitschy? Does a bear pray in the woods?

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Hokey smokes.

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I’d complain about this one, but somehow I think I’d feel like a dog in a manger.

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Join us again tomorrow, when we’ll see– well, I better not tell you what we’ll see, or you won’t want to join us again tomorrow.

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(Sources vary, but these can be found in many places on the Internet. Particular credit goes to Marko’s 27 worst nativity sets. And of course The Crescat’s collection.)

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4. You’re a Mean One, Mister Kitsch: More Tacky Nativity Scenes!
5. Tales from the Kitsch: More Tacky (and Creepy!) Nativity Scenes

Tacky Nativity Scenes: The Squeaquel is a post from Eric Pazdziora. Buy Eric's CD New Creation from CDbaby or iTunes!