tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979Fri, 17 May 2013 19:13:31 +0000Eric AugenbraunForeign PolicyBirthing BloodFringeAnnoying Internet AtheistsYoutubeBLTsBirthersDeath PenaltyRobertTerrorismDogsAlan GreenspanEarthquakesStalingradAyn RandComedyGlenn BeckIsraelHouseSotomayorMessage BoardsPornographyTom BradyFireJoeMorganCollegeThis bullshit maundering emotional crap doesn't even have wirelessFood MetaphorsPoint-CounterpointRegionalismThomas FriedmanHip-HopMurder My BallsSpielbergNew RepublicThe BeauvillesShamWowLevi JohnstonWrestling2011 MLB PostseasonSpace DraculaTim McCarver"Reverse Racism"FOX NewsAnimeJihadObjectivismFuck the YankeesJohn KeeganTortureChristmasTumblrJosh GibsonBarry BondsDanzigFloridaDan BrownWomen Be ShoppinBuzz BissingerBasketballJeff's Generous PenisiPhoneBriefs RodeoNeighborsHurricanesBieberAIPACAmerica's Screaming ConscienceRick ScottLaborHomophobiaHitlerNew JournalismRaysP.G. WodehouseStar TrekMariska Hargitay fakes celebrities Thackeray nudes breasts tits topless Olivia Benson search keywords John Maynard KeynesInternet MaleMaundering Emotional CrapJeevesJoe BuckFound StuffNurembergMaddenCop RockLibertarianismPaulusNazisScrapsHomicide: Life on the StreetDolchstoßlegendeHigh ConceptDavid Foster WallaceAristocratic WhimsyWikipediaKubrickJim RomeGUNSLINGSPat JordanJoe TheismannBay AreaThe Second Great DepressionPrecipiceThe WifePoetrySaving Private RyanG.I. Joe PSAsMannyHerman's HeadObamaErin Andrews Nude2008 MLB PostseasonBook PenisMagical NegroAbortionJumpstreetDevriFacebookFDREliminationismFrackingPerky JerkyMailerInsanitySocialismDerek JeterLimbaughSex and the CityWarAmy SteeleKnittingFreeRepublicDavid EcksteinCowboy NarratorsBuck O'NeilSearch StringRocky II/Star Trek III Cold-Open RepeatJimmy Carter2009 MLB PostseasonGulf Oil SpillMorrisseyStar WarsYoutubeDoublerRigamarockMichael JacksonTelevisionPaul FussellFootballBBCHoobastankGiulianiFutility GameHuffington PostThe Ultimate HustlerFrank TVJournalismGawker.comFatHarold ReynoldsFISTEDBruckheimerMornacaleFuck y'all I aint even know what this shit meansCriterion RecollectionThe WireKanye WestSheriff John BunnellHistoriographyGamesTrapper KeeperThe SmithsGQ.comImportant Declarative StatementsNewsweekTuesdays with MartyMysterious BenefactorHistoryJesusBooks-A-MillionSomethingAwfulRussian LitJoe MorganNewsPlangentTom WolfePimpingKennedyDestructo SalonESPNACORNGrady Fucking LittleFree Market NonsenseThomas PynchonThat Stuck-Up Princess KateIdi Amin DadaJonathan BernhardtBill JamesApple StorePink FloydRepublicansMichelle MalkinWailing WallsShia LaBeoufBaseballBrompton CocktailJShapThe OnionGaddafiJapanMurderMark BrendlePedroMr. AwesomeAnnouncersMoviesTony KornheiserMoneyballMagdalen NabbChatlogMcCarver MomentNotCoachTitoIan KershawTwitterDaily Showjust call my assistant angie or some shitGöringMcCainGay TaleseGeneral ZeeviNavel GazingMichelle BachmannMarty PeretzSabermetricsReligious WhackosMyrrhThe SimpsonsWill LeitchPoliticsJoss WhedonAlex NicholsonCommercialsCaleb Powell Presents SPIDER ROOMWhat would an abortionist doErin Andrews Nude VideoRacismFascismMaddonHunter FeltLibyaMiddle EastWu-TangGlennCarl HiaasenThat GuysJoe PozIslamRon PaulTerrifying Glimpse of My Zoophilic LoinscapeA Word That Should Be at UrbanDictionary.com But I'm Not Going to Upload/Define MyselfFeed Issues for FeedersInternetGrittyMusicLaw and OrderBrett FavreCorySatellite HighKim Jong-IlAntony BeevorBrian SchoferBertie WoosterSimpsonsTool2010 MLB PostseasonComically Unimportant Declarative StatementsTexasHealth CareVice.comIranWhite Man's OverbiteAudio PenisThe ClassicalDeadspinRed SoxReaganBill SimmonsRibsLolRandsJeb LundStephen BaldwinBill PlaschkeDeathErin Andrews Peephole VideoDexterSarah PalinBooks                 The official blog of notorious former African dictator Mobutu Sese Sekohttp://www.mrdestructo.com/noreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)Blogger551125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-745087645243401920Tue, 14 May 2013 07:36:00 +00002013-05-14T04:16:17.072-04:00JournalismJeb LundMoviesHealth CareHuffington PostEarly this morning, the New York Times published an op-ed from actress Angelina Jolie in which she announced that she had undergone a double mastectomy, the surgical removal of both breasts. Those people who might joke that Jolie is best known to male moviegoers of the Internet generation for her breasts have a good point, and they get right to why her op-ed offers a welcome gesture. Even as we http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/05/lets-talk-about-angelina-jolies-breasts.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-7287876528351403279Tue, 07 May 2013 08:44:00 +00002013-05-07T14:25:57.510-04:00For the vast majority of users, Twitter is not important. I understand that. In the same way that I find scrapbooking a life-draining expense of time and creative effort, I can understand someone looking at my Twitter feed as 30,000+ depressing examples of life pissed into a void. But, just as scrapbooking gives a mode of expression to its fans, we have to acknowledge that Twitter provides a http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/05/twitter-theft-and-how-huffpo-and.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-5590632285473727772Fri, 03 May 2013 14:18:00 +00002013-05-03T11:13:49.089-04:00Maundering Emotional CrapJeb LundPimpingNew RepublicWhen I wrote my final "America's Screaming Conscience" column for Gawker, I remember sitting at the keyboard, panicked about how much my world would be upended by simply changing my name. I knew some readers would instantly hate me, while others would resent having assumptions about me so radically altered. In a frankly very lucky, if not privileged, sense, it was like "coming out" on an extremehttp://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/05/tnr-gay-athlete-in-worlds-most-macho.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-513285976695652143Fri, 26 Apr 2013 13:00:00 +00002013-04-26T20:13:07.280-04:00MoviesCriterion RecollectionMark BrendleNote: We, the good people of Et tu, Mr. Destructo? are proud to present Criterion Recollection, an analysis of the popular Criterion Collection of historic and unique achievements in film. Your guide is Mark Brendle, a noted chair connoisseur and fiction author. Brendle lives in the Pacific Northwest in a small post-recycled yurt adjacent to America's largest family-owned retail video and book http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/criterion-recollection-erosion.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (brendle)7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-754833800731140477Thu, 25 Apr 2013 09:42:00 +00002013-04-25T08:33:42.916-04:00JournalismDestructo SalonJeb LundAristocratic WhimsyGeneral ZeeviFree Market NonsenseMark BrendleMatthew Yglesias—a Norelco marketing experiment to see if a hand-drawn Sharpie beard on a peeled potato could sell men's earrings—wrote a morally and intellectually odious article at his second job yesterday. His Slate column, "Different Places Have Different Safety Rules and That's OK," addressed the deaths of 161 workers in a factory collapse in Bangladesh with the tone they so richly deserved:http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/destructo-salon-does-matthew-yglesias.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-6685744626364297090Mon, 22 Apr 2013 06:41:00 +00002013-04-22T04:51:32.166-04:00Jeb LundTerrorismInternetGeneral ZeeviPoetryIn a week that saw major global earthquakes, a bombing at a marathon, a city shut down, a series of deadly shootouts, the defeat of even a toothless piece of gun-control legislation, the Internet and the New York Post proudly labeling several innocent people as terrorists, hate crimes against Muslims, and a massive and deadly explosion in Texas—well, after a week like that, it takes some serious http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/busta-poesy-amanda-palmers-unpublished.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-5675385642758479662Thu, 18 Apr 2013 17:26:00 +00002013-04-18T15:08:53.970-04:00DeathTwitterRepublicansGeneral ZeeviYesterday, the US Senate killed even a candyass, quintessentially senatorial approach to gun control. You could have cocked a single eye at the television with lid at half mast while falling into a K-hole and still had enough situational awareness to be furious at the lobbyist capture of our most venerated, sclerotic chamber full of war profiteering racists, foot-draggers and bozos. This was, http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/cordial-greetings-to-45-pocket-toys-of.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-1359213337694909872Wed, 10 Apr 2013 13:30:00 +00002013-04-25T04:31:42.486-04:00JournalismDestructo SalonJeb LundPoint-CounterpointNavel GazingHitlerAristocratic WhimsyGeneral ZeeviMark BrendleLast Monday, New Inquiry blogger Aaron Bady audited the word satire and made it clear. He wrote, "If something is not taken to be satire, it fails as satire. [It's] an effect, and everything depends on how the joke is received, what the author intended, what the circumstances were in which it was made, and so on." It's an interesting definition, both for the way it's made and the assumptions http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/point-counterpoint-is-satire-even-thing.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-5234054237919495592Fri, 05 Apr 2013 16:36:00 +00002013-04-10T01:42:38.824-04:00ObamaSocialismMoviesRepublicansGeneral ZeeviNote: Today, we, the good people of Et tu, Mr. Destructo? turn for insight to our Managing Editor General Rehavam "Gandhi" Ze'evi, former Israeli Minister of Tourism. Having faked his assassination in the Mt. Scopus Hyatt Hotel, the General has been in deep cover, in Judea and Samaria. He last joined us for a look at Big Mark Brendle's Radio Fragments. Dinesh D'Souza: Portrait Of The Failure Ashttp://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/the-sweet-smell-of-failure-dinesh.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (General Rehavam 'Gandhi' Ze'evi)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-6949699574354178160Tue, 02 Apr 2013 15:00:00 +00002013-04-26T21:43:49.551-04:00JournalismComically Unimportant Declarative Statements"April is the cruellest month," sang Elliot Smith on the Good Will Hunting soundtrack, the score to a timeless libretto about Ben Affleck gay romance on an apple orchard. Every day of April, 2013, will be a fool's day. How could it be otherwise? The limp gray matter that defines our terminal-stage republic, in the skulls of nonentities like Ben Rhodes or Luke Russert, can't begin to understand http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/04/we-is-risen-reacquaint-yourself-with.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (General Rehavam 'Gandhi' Ze'evi)5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-509399891601606625Fri, 01 Feb 2013 17:52:00 +00002013-02-01T13:09:34.687-05:00Aristocratic WhimsyGeneral ZeeviMark BrendleIn these times of economic peril—will the Dow crack 14,000 again? Where can I sell my plasma for cash? Can I volunteer for jury duty?—we, the creatives at Et tu, Mr. Destructo?, draw what succor we can from the only financial forecast any human heart needs: the word of the Prince of Peace himself, Jesus Christ. As the First Epistle of Peter tells us, "God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/02/letters-to-vogue-come-come-nuclear-bombs.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (General Rehavam 'Gandhi' Ze'evi)11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-105187477133602993Tue, 08 Jan 2013 11:11:00 +00002013-01-08T13:47:30.429-05:00This bullshit maundering emotional crap doesn't even have wirelessCriterion RecollectionBooksGeneral ZeeviMark BrendleNote: Today, we, the good people of Et tu, Mr. Destructo? turn for insight to General Rehavam "Gandhi" Ze'evi, former Israeli Minister of Tourism. Having faked his assassination in the Mt. Scopus Hyatt Hotel, the General has been in deep cover, in Judea and Samaria. He last joined us to explain how Christopher Hitchens should burn in hell, how we can help Andrew Breitbart get there and how http://www.mrdestructo.com/2013/01/the-generals-fiction-military_8.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (General Rehavam 'Gandhi' Ze'evi)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-4751874891434241642Wed, 07 Nov 2012 21:26:00 +00002012-12-18T12:48:24.989-05:00In 1960, Richard Nixon famously endured a TV debate, despite being ill, pale and underweight. He sweated through rub-on makeup designed to hide his stubble, and he looked like Death come to sell the same. By 1969, Roger Ailes (who would later found Fox News) had managed Nixon the candidate through a series of fake town halls, and Joe McGinniss had written The Selling of the President. Success, http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/11/inside-candidates-studio-exit-interview.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-5608061813228006979Wed, 26 Sep 2012 00:57:00 +00002012-09-25T20:58:54.291-04:00TwitterAristocratic WhimsyRepublicansAbout a month ago, I started tweeting at Rafalca, Ann Romney's personal torture horse, who Ann took to England to riverdance in humiliating circles after years of ruining her youth. I even kind of hoped to get a little trending hashtag going for a while, maybe to push Rafalca to break the silence and the cycle of abuse. She never replied. Needless to say, it got discouraging after a while, http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/09/texts-to-rafalca.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-4043817511512085811Sat, 11 Aug 2012 17:20:00 +00002012-08-11T13:26:40.126-04:00Ayn RandObjectivismTwitterRepublicansFree Market NonsenseThere's something kind of wondrous about watching major world events unfold via a late-night Twitter feed. While a lot of the people hanging around are Aussies or Kiwis and thus up at totally reasonable hours, everyone else is drunk, insomniac, a crank, a news junkie or a dangerous loner. And, because there are fewer people around — and because those who are seem more forthrightly oddball — the http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/08/discovering-paul-ryan-odyssey-in-twitter.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-9219735476661510880Thu, 09 Aug 2012 17:33:00 +00002012-08-09T13:46:40.146-04:00WarYoutubeDoublerSimpsonsYoutubeThe "Dental Plan" sequence from The Simpsons possibly represents the greatest use of five words in comedy history. And if that overstates the case, at least consider that many of us have repeatedly gotten it stuck in our heads for over a decade without much complaint.Because it appears in my imagination so much, it winds up becoming an accidental soundtrack for lots of different things. It's easyhttp://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/08/tubedubber-dental-plan-part-iii.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-748820888749208028Fri, 11 May 2012 12:59:00 +00002012-05-11T09:06:07.269-04:00EliminationismGawker.comRepublicansInsanityThis site has gone dormant over the last month due to a dead computer and my inability to do much more than write basic text documents with my makeshift alternatives. I do apologize for the lack of updates here, both links to pieces elsewhere and also new writing from General Ze'evi and other contributors who want to do something fun.That's a ways off. For now, here's some fun hate mail I got http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/05/i-get-letters-bend-over-and-grab-your.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)36tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-6149561771910741174Thu, 05 Apr 2012 16:37:00 +00002012-04-05T12:38:45.357-04:00Religious WhackosJournalismNewsTelevisionFOX Newsby FUQUAMANUELAs far as Fox News "personalities" go, Geraldo Rivera has always been the most palatable to me. Sean Hannity exudes a smugness unbefitting his accomplishments and intellectual abilities and bleats about "liberal double standards" and "media bias." When he furrows his brow just so and flashes that little smirk, it provokes a Pavlovian fist-through-TV response. Meanwhile, Bill http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/04/geraldo-riveras-greatest-hits.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-2615001781338791300Thu, 05 Apr 2012 06:43:00 +00002012-04-05T02:51:46.120-04:00EliminationismCollegeRacismGawker.comPoliticsAmerica's Screaming ConscienceSometimes you just can't think of one "big idea" essay. Thankfully, every day, the United States commits so many individual acts of social, judicial and political horror that you can effortlessly pile them all together into a grab bag of nightmares.I had no choice but to go that route earlier this week. Topics ranged from Arizona's cultural eliminationism, the snobbery of American colleges, the http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/04/gawker-salad-bar-of-american-dread.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-7483441028350393628Thu, 05 Apr 2012 06:33:00 +00002012-04-05T02:42:15.094-04:00Gawker.comPoliticsHealth CareAmerica's Screaming ConscienceWhile the right used Cheney's heart transplant as an excuse to again attack Obamacare, liberal commentators again missed a chance to underscore health care inequality. Going after the low-hanging fruit of Cheney-heart jokes also meant missing the far more valuable low-hanging fruit of asking why every American isn't guaranteed at least some of the health care privileges that Cheney's lavish http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/04/gawker-why-cheneys-heart-makes-good.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-546256829918271043Thu, 29 Mar 2012 06:40:00 +00002012-04-05T02:32:12.879-04:00Gawker.comPoliticsAmerica's Screaming ConscienceIf you're an elected official, actual democracy is messy. It's anarchic. It does things you don't want it to do, like challenge politicians ostensibly sympathetic to your cause, propose legislative agendas inconvenient to easy goals and make you have to work harder to retain your incumbency when phoning in YEA votes on gimme legislation normally does that.Perhaps that's why MoveOn.org has become http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/03/gawker-time-to-occupy-occupy-wall.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-7382128561900817531Thu, 29 Mar 2012 06:21:00 +00002012-04-05T02:32:43.528-04:00Gawker.comPoliticsRepublicansAmerica's Screaming ConscienceWednesday morning, a man working for Mitt Romney's presidential campaign described the transition from the primaries to the general election as "a reset button. Everything changes. It’s almost like an Etch A Sketch." The man who said that was Eric Fehrnstrom, which would be fine if he were Professor Farnsworth's nemesis on Futurama or President of the Association of People Who Share the Same Namehttp://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/03/gawker-gop-death-games-for-kids.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-8403069622277745037Thu, 29 Mar 2012 06:12:00 +00002012-04-05T02:32:43.535-04:00RacismGawker.comDeathAmerica's Screaming ConscienceFloridaThe same week that the Trayvon Martin story finally broke into the national consciousness also saw NYPD officers dislocating protesters' thumbs and smashing heads into windows in yet another scouring of Occupy groups. Automatic contempt for certain people and styles of dress, as well as assumptions of their unlawful conduct is neither restricted to the south nor any race. But that isn't why what http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/03/gawker-sad-familiarity-of-trayvon.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-708607628022728020Thu, 15 Mar 2012 06:36:00 +00002012-04-05T02:32:43.541-04:00JournalismObamaTortureTerrorismAmerica's Screaming ConscienceMiddle EastThe most recent article from The Nation's Jeremy Scahill profiled the imprisonment of Yemeni journalist Abdulelah Haider Shaye. For covering American cluster bomb strikes in Yemen and the radicalization of Yemeni citizens and their support for Al Qaeda, Shaye has been beaten and tortured, imprisoned for two years and, at America's request, seen a presidential pardon from Yemen's Ali Abdullah http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/03/gawker-obama-mouthpiece-to.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5119909537304935979.post-6226843139197148193Tue, 13 Mar 2012 07:48:00 +00002012-04-05T02:32:43.547-04:00WarGawker.comAmerica's Screaming ConscienceHistoryInsanityYou could be forgiven if, on learning of a U.S. Army Staff Sergeant executing 16 people in villages near Kandahar, you secretly wished that he was some virulent racist—a vicious dickhead who slipped through the vetting process.Racism, at least, would have been a kind of excuse, evidence of a critically planned process. It's almost comforting: Even the most saintly among us has harbored or http://www.mrdestructo.com/2012/03/gawker-dehumanize-yourself-and-face-to.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jeb Lund)4