ETHEREAL CODE

There Will Be A Legacy site for The New Absurdist

2023-08-18T10:45:00.000-04:00

Ha, ha. Thought I was gone, didn't you? Well, I was. A quick post to check if I still know how to do this. Yes, I do. A new website called The New Absurdist: Legacy, is being developed. Former writers at the website are being asked to contribute 5 stories posted back when The New Absurdist was online. It's an open call: e-mail headsfromspace @ gmail.com

Still Alive Kirk My Old Friend

2011-11-23T20:28:00.002-05:00

Still alive and still thinking that blogging is not a terrible idea. I've been posting at this blog for 8 years. It's never been the most popular blog but has outlasted so many that someday some eager young thing will contact me to ask me "WHAT WAS IT REALLY LIKE" to do something as creakingly ancient as BLOGGING.

'Tender Young Shoots' March 2010 Issue

2010-03-26T12:11:00.003-04:00

Rumble Magazine releases it's March 2010 issue. Compact fiction by Chloe Caldwell, Len Kuntz, Alyssa Martino, and Abi Wyatt. Also, J.A. Tyler reviews Words by Andy Devine.

Hilarious discussion at HTML Giant about who is the best rapper. Embarrassing for those revealed to be douchebags. As for me it's all about the ice.

December 2009 Issue Of Rumble Magazine

2009-12-17T11:26:00.005-05:00

"Rumble Magazine wishes you a Merry Christmas. Rumble Magazine focuses on Kristina Born’s One Hour Of Television.

In this issue: Digitized fiction by Thomas Bonfiglio, Merle Drown, Lalo Espejo, Joy Lanzendorfer, Neila Mezynski, Jonathan Ullyot, and xTx. A 3-Part interview with Blake Butler, Kristina Born, and Shane Jones, a review of One Hour Of Television, both by J.A. Tyler."

This issue is super sweet in my opinion. Enjoy.

Man Posts To Own Blog

2009-12-08T14:23:00.002-05:00

I haven't posted here in a while. I've had nothing to say, really, and I've been busy with Rumble Magazine and traveling to the great state of Wisconsin to see my brother get married to a nice girl who will bake potatoes for him. This occurred in Bayfield and was cold but beautiful and I liked it.

Nothing published recently but someday I will write something and have it published if you really want me to. I'm serious I'll do it.

Craig Snyder @ Wigleaf, GWI, & TNA

2009-09-22T12:23:00.004-04:00

Some recent publications of my ultra short stories: Girls With Insurance has risen from the dead and kindly revived Totalitarian Dance Party. GWI has also taken Janie. The New Absurdist has included my short Lindsay Lohan in TNA Anthology 3 and Wigleaf has published Death City.

Shoplifting From American Apparel

2009-08-20T11:51:00.003-04:00

Tao Lin has a novella coming out on September 15 called Shoplifting From American Apparel. More info and early reviews here.

I've read good and bad things about this book but being familiar with Tao's writing I think it will be worth checking out.

Gene Morgan's Twitter Feed Press

2009-07-27T12:16:00.007-04:00

Gene Morgan has started an ingenious new press utilizing the Twitter app. So far he has published 3 or 4 things, two of which I like very much. I know others are writing novels via Twitter but this is the first publishing venture that I know of.

You can find it here.

It's super neat. Nice job, Gene.

Rumble Magazine 5th Anniversary Issue

2009-07-08T10:44:00.003-04:00

It has been 5 years since we started Rumble, the web magazine of microscopic fiction and poetry. Our new issue will celebrate this fact by being ultra mega awesome, or whatever. It's due out in about a week, so check it out and become impressed by its awesomeness and lovely, crinkly edges.

New Rumble Magazine, May 2009 Issue

2009-05-24T15:38:00.006-04:00

The newest issue of Rumble is online now. New fiction by Michael Doherty, Paul Lynch, David Miller, Meg Pokrass, and Wayne Scheer. Poetry by Ricky Garni and Dennis Mahagin. Assuming I am not killed in a horrible car crash we will celebrate 5 years of Rumble in July. Feels pretty good. I have no free t-shirts to give away, in case you were wondering.

The newest issue of Absurdist Monthly Review is also available for download. I had nothing to do with that. But it's good, very good.

Action Plan! @ Bewildering Stories

2009-03-30T09:47:00.006-04:00

A very short something called Action Plan! is published at Bewildering Stories. It's been rejected a few times by editors who didn't like it. I always liked it. It contains very detailed instructions. Follow them to the letter.

New Rumble Magazine, March 2009

2009-03-03T11:26:00.003-05:00

The new issue of Rumble Magazine is online with stories by Lydia Copeland, Marylou Fusco, Ellen Lindquist, Brandi Wells, and xTx, plus a poem by Jon Bennett and a review of Sometimes My Heart Pushes My Ribs by Ellen Kennedy.

It's pretty good.

I'm working on a new design and "skinning" the site with multiple style sheets.

I'm thinking about adding a Helvetica skin.

Sometimes My Heart Pushes My Ribs by Ellen Kennedy

2009-02-23T12:06:00.007-05:00

This new book of prose-poetry is available now from Muumuu House, an independent publisher. Some of the work in this book has been published previously online or on Ellen's blog. The book is reasonably priced at $12 dollars. You can find more information here. A page of reviews can be found here.

I'm happy for Ellen, and hope the publication of her book will make her happy. I think it will. I am waiting to receive a copy. Once I have received the copy and read it, and fondled it a bit, I will write a review and publish it at Rumble. Ellen has a rare talent and your money would be better spent buying this book than some dvd with stupid car explosions in it.

The Unusually Destructive Ladybug Is Published; Hurt Feelings Caused By Dicey Brown Magazine Are Discussed

2009-02-08T14:28:00.008-05:00

My story The Unusually Destructive Ladybug has been published over at juked. This was the story dicey brown magazine failed to publish. This failure led me to declare prejudice against dicey brown magazine for a period of one year, as previously noted.

The publication of The Unusually Destructive Ladybug is a good thing. This has not lessened hurt feelings caused by dicey brown magazine but has helped me to regain composure. I am okay now.

Electric Obama Boogaloo

2009-01-09T09:53:00.008-05:00

I am now prejudiced against Dicey Brown Magazine because they accepted one of my stories many months ago but have failed to publish it or answer my e-mail. I do not hate them because people are flawed but I will maintain a small grudge against them for a period of one year.

I am waiting for Ellen Kennedy's new book to be published but I will not pre-order it because of extreme poverty.

I have purchased Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo for 3.99 but have not watched it. I am waiting for "the right moment". I have downloaded the soundtrack to the movie, possibly illegally. It is "the bomb".

Back to THE OBAMA:

I would like to see Obama say "stop killing Palestinian women and children" to the Israelis even though he is not president yet. I would like to see Obama go to the Cowardly Lion and say "give me courage" and then go and say that. Maybe he is not saying that because he doesn't have enough courage.

It's just a fucking theory, people.

Obama Says Bush Is Still The Decider

2008-11-16T13:34:00.011-05:00

President Bush is still "The Decider" for two more months. This means he gets to decide things, like about wars and things, for a little while longer.

Obama declared "I am not the president." and "There is only one president."

Personally I am happy about Pre-President Obama, except for a couple details. A few weeks ago I sent away for a free Obama pin and never got it. Recently I just signed up to receive a free Obama sticker and am looking forward to not receiving it as well. I am very selfish and I want my free stuff, but Obama won't send me my stuff.

And the Obama campaign is still asking me for money.

They will send you a Obama poster if you send them the money. They want the money to "help with the transition". That's cool. Whatever. I wonder if they would consider sending some money to poor people to help with their mother-fucking transition from poor and suicidal to poor and apathetic.

Look, I'm not knocking Obama. Well maybe a little. I remember during the campaign I used to hear him say "we need to help the middle class" like the middle class had leprosy or something. This was the Clinton strategic mantra and it worked for Obama as well. But, Dude, I think that poor people could seriously use some money. Like money for food and shit, and clothes and shelter.

BULLETIN FOR OBAMA: Poor people STILL exist!

2ND BULLETIN FOR OBAMA: All black people in America used to be really, really poor! Many still are, despite Compassionate Conservatism.

Well that's all for now. I personally feel maybe 10% more hopeful about America right now. I feel a strong psychic hunch that we, as a country, may kill 20% fewer innocent civilians in 2009. I even think it is possible that President Obama may actually mention poor people, some time in the far distant future.

On the day we all get our rocket packs.

<HTML GIANT> and Muumuu House

2008-10-15T11:45:00.016-04:00

Two great new websites have appeared.

There are no Manatees on these websites.

These websites are "non-gay" but not "anti-gay"

This is a hot picture of a young Sarah Palin.

She is "fresh" and "midwestern"

<HTML GIANT> is the internet literature magazine blog of the future. The posts are very "apt" and of interest to writers and publishers. This month they are "talking shit" about people and magazines. The content is "entertaining and informative". My favorite articles so far are Jimmy Chen's Against HTML, Giants, and HTMLGiant and Sam Pink's All Internet Writers Are Fucking Pussies. There is seriously funny shit at <HTML GIANT>. There are some graphic descriptions of genitalia.

Muumuu House is a new small press created by Tao Lin. The website, like <HTML GIANT>, is "aesthetically pleasing" and easy on the eyes, with little graphic distraction. The thing I like best about Muumuu House so far is the two new Ellen Kennedy stories, and the promise of a poetry chapbook from Ellen early next year.

Both sites are "damn fine" and "smell nice" and may possibly have "street cred" with Matthew McConaughey.

New Episodes Of Animal Cops Are Needed

2008-07-22T14:42:00.009-04:00

I watch a lot of Animal Cops on TV, because I like it when they rescue fucked up animals and then make them better. I like it when the animals get better and are happy and get adopted by people who are not cruel to animals.

But now I have watched too many episodes of Animal Cops and there are no new Animal Copsepisodes and I have to stop watching Animal Cops for a while. Maybe I should watch Animal Precinct. Maybe.

Something I notice about Animal Cops is that almost all the people who get arrested for animal cruelty are poor and black, or just black. I wish they would show some rich white people getting arrested, and maybe beaten about the head and shoulders, just to balance things out.

Sometimes the people are white. The white people are usually poor too.

That is depressing and animal cruelty is depressing.

I am thinking about a new format for Animal Cops. The new format would be this: The Animal Cops would train the rescued animals to go back to their former owners and kick them in the nuts or something.

I would also like to see more manatees. There are never any manatees on Animal Cops even though manatees are getting pounded. People in speedboats keep running over them and the Animal Cops should do something. So far they have not done anything about this. This is something that should be looked into.

Update: There will be more Animal Cops.

Maybe there will be Manatee Cops.

Elimae Robots

2008-05-29T12:50:00.010-04:00

Two more stories that contain robots or references to robots but do not feature robots have been published at elimae. You can find them here. These are good robot stories but will not achieve the level of greatness I wished for.

I want to write more robot stories because publishers like stories with robots in them, if the robots are interesting in some way, or if someone smashes them.

I also liked this. I felt good after reading it, like maybe I could become a better person if I tried really hard.

Robot image by Rosie Robinson.

Wigleaf's Top 50 [very] Short Fictions Of 2008

2008-05-20T14:18:00.003-04:00

My short fiction Two Robots made the list. I am happy about this because I did not know about it. It was a nice surprise but there's no money involved in case you are wondering if there was.

There isn't.

Jai Britton's story Mass Media, a story we published in Rumble, was included on the long shortlist, as was Gene Morgan's short Steak and Lobster and other stories by people whose names I recognize.

Two new robots stories are published this month in elimae, which published many stories appearing on both lists.

New Incredibly Tiny Literature

2008-05-03T14:32:00.004-04:00

The new issue of Rumble is online today. Features stories by returning authors Wayne Sullins and Luis C. Berriozabal, plus new fiction by Matt Marinovich and Merle Drown. You will become a better person after reading these stories.

Franz Kafka's The Metamorphosis as a Flash Movie

Micro Fiction is the new black

Wigleaf is very short fiction. Flash Fiction Online wants to pay you. That's pretty fucking incredible if you ask me. Sorry about the use of the word fuck but I was just so fucking amazed.

Battlestar Galactica Ripped Me Off; Starbuck Still Hot Though

2008-04-06T15:09:00.014-04:00

No Spoilers, Bitches!

After advertising their season premiere like 10 billion times in the past month, I was expecting giant shitloads of action and Cylon killing from Battlestar Galactica. Instead (gigantic ripoff) more scenes with stupid Baltar and people arguing with Starbuck about some stupid shit. Why would anyone argue with Starbuck? She's right about everything, all the time, end of story, and is insanely hot, and will kick your ass before making love to you (if you are very lucky, which you are not).

I was like, whatever. I was pretty sad.

Maybe the next episode will be better. They set me up with a tremendous cliff-hanger at season's end last year. I mean, I'm so pissed now. If you feel sorry for me you should go on the world wide web and download hot pictures of Starbuck and send them to me with encouraging captions like "don't worry about it" and "I can't believe how hot Starbuck is". That might help but probably not. I can't see how anything could help at this point.

They have cliff-hanged my ass.

I, Blogger

2008-03-07T13:28:00.002-05:00

Yes, I retain the ability to blog though I have not done it for a while. I don't know why. It's not necessary to explain. I have a small number of things to say. Tao Lin wrote a story with Lindsay Lohan in it even though he should have known I wrote my own story with Lindsay Lohan in it but have been dissatisfied with it. I am not angry.

Bear Parade published a new book and it's called Eat When You Feel Sad by Zachary German. I am surprised they published another book so soon. I have not read it yet. I just glanced at it and then did other things. I will read it soon.

Rumble has not been updated in a while. I have been sick, or not feeling well. I feel bad about it but will get to work on it soon. I hope not too many people are angry with me.

I am angry that the sci-fi channel is not showing more Dr. Who episodes, and cannot even find out when more Dr. Who episodes will be on. It is frustrating. It is also making me kind of sad but not too sad. I will probably get over it.

Rise Of The Mentards & Flower Boy in Juked #5

2008-01-22T14:55:00.000-05:00

I have achieved inclusion into juked #5 print anthology. I have achieved a satisfactory level of coherence and non-boredom with my short story Rise Of The Mentards & Flower Boy.

I have been invited to the Luna Park Review launch party, which is also a kind of launch for juked #5, but cannot attend.

Too bad, because Tao Lin and Claudia Smith will be doing readings. They both write real good and I like what they write.

There are parts of Flower Boy I really like. Other parts are sketchy. If you buy juked #5 you can read the whole story, plus other things like poetry and an interview with Claudia which might be interesting.

Small Pale Humans

2007-12-10T17:47:00.000-05:00

Bear Parade has published small pale humans by Daniel Spinks. I read the book and enjoyed it. I thought about going through drive-throughs while reading it, and what marriage would be like. I will go back and read the book again very soon. small pale humans is composed of very small chapters or stories. All the characters in the stories are humans, no animals (maybe an animal somewhere. I can't remember. The main characters are human). This book uses very simple straightforward language. You will find this book very easy to read.