A Divorced Man’s Survival Guide to Dating After Divorce

S0 are you a divorced man trying to get back into dating after divorce and wondering how you are going to handle all this? Are you a middle-aged man and now single again after being in a long relationship. Looking back and taking a scroll down memory lane you realize that you are not the man that you were before.

You got married, and the person you are today may have changed dramatically over the years from the man you were. Back then you may have felt like girls came around easily and or for others maybe that became a task.

Now reality hits that the man you were is no longer there,  and the man you became just isn’t enough, you are now single again and unsure of where to begin. You’re scared of what is out there now aren’t you. You don’t have any game left, or maybe you never had it.

Men change when their married; it’s all a part of the society system. We are trained by it, the media, our parents, people, news, work, movies, and mostly by women. You have done what you felt was the proper thing for a man to do based on society’s rules and what you learned along the way. You worked half of your life away to make a decent living to support the marriage and your family, and now your trying to get back into dating after divorce

You now find that you have lost your girl for some reason, possibly have children, and now forced to get back into dating. Not only are you seriously rusty at the meeting and dating women, you are extremely rusty at most social “game”, Yes I called it game. For a lack of a better word, life is a game, it’s a dance. Whether you want to accept that or not, it is what it is. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you can get this part of your life handled.

So what do you do when you find yourself in this situation? Do you jump and find the first woman you can and latch a hold of hoping she wants you too? NO! You need to sit back, relax, and take the proper steps in making the rest of your life better than it ever has been. The past is gone, and it will never be back.

The good thing about that is now you have a hold on making your future be whatever you want it to be and trust me, no matter what it is becoming adept at social interactions is the key to making it the most fulfilling life you can desire. Learning how to master this part of your life is truly the key to becoming happy. For example, The reason most guys work so hard to make a good living is to make sure they can find the best girl they can.

Seriously think about it, It’s what we work so hard for. Those are all material things that will probably give you a moment of happiness but once it’s gone it’s gone. To lead you to the happiness most seek for, you just need to learn how to attract women and society in the right way. You can do this without having to be rich.

Why is it called the Divorced Man’s Survival Guide to Dating After Divorce?

It is called the Divorced Man’s Survival Guide to dating after divorce because it is what I could have used when I got divorced. Dating after a divorce is much different then a y9oung man just dating. The whole dynamic is worlds apart. How we see people, how we see dreams and ambitions, it;s all a different picture. Especially if you have children, is it not fathers out there? It’s a culmination of strategies to get you mental state back on track and make you happy about life again. It’s to give you hope that life is only going to get better if you put the right effort in to do so. It’s to give you the secrets that I learned to get any woman you want, and prepare you to be ready for when you finally decide you want that one girl you consider your 10. If you have not prepared yourself as I describe in this book, you will not be ready for her. She will pass you by like so many others have so far in your life. All you need is a few tweaks in yourself and your way of doing things, and you can transform yourself to a place you can not imagine. I Sdid it for me. It’s not only for divorced men, the principles, techniques, strategies and tactics described in this book apply to any man of any age and any circumstance.

A little about me, I am Evan Hawk, and I am 40 years old. I am divorced with a child. I am a single parent, and I have endured everything I talk about. I have researched this material and experimented extensively in everything you will read on here. At 40, if you take care of yourself, get in shape, walk your talk, carry your confidence, and have a stable life you can attract any woman you desire. So you must take the time to build this life. I will step you through exactly how I did it.

Some of what I will tell you may offend some people , and it may even turn you off. It certainly might not be your style, and you may not want to do it exactly how I did it. You need to find your own niche that works for you. I plan on giving you a blueprint of success for you to model after. Modeling means you take what you like about a certain method or process that has worked for others, and you engineer it to be your own, in your way.

That being said you must also be willing to step out of your comfort zone and try new things. If what you are comfortable doing is working to the best you can, meaning you have the woman of your dreams, and you can step into any social situation with ease, then you don’t need to be listening to me or anyone else. You’re perfect. For most of us, we aren’t, I know I am far from it, but I keep at it in baby steps every day and it works. Not only does it work, but it makes me feel happy. Improving some part of my life every day lets me know that my future will keep getting better no matter what circumstance life has.

Why is taking the time to get this part of your life handled? As you will learn, your mental state or your “inner game” is the most vital part of your confidence. Once you feel OK about yourself and what your life will be, you feel strong about the whole picture, and day-to-day things become an ease. Soon, the life you always wanted will be your reality.

Keep your head straight and come back soon as I carry on this conversation, or you can get the Ebook, Divorced Man’s Survival Guide to Dating After Divorce to get the complete, detailed step by step outline to getting what you are want in this part of your life.

Get your copy of the Divorced Man’s Survival Guide to Dating

Evan

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• Dating After Divorce – What To Do First
• How To Attract Women By Building A Better You

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog

Use Pre-Selection to Meet More Women!

Pre-selection is part of what we call a display of Higher value, or a DHV. Pre-selection in a nut shell is exactly how it sounds. You are thought of as pre-selected when a woman observes the actions of other women in your life. For example if you walk into a club with a pretty girl, and many others are happy to see you and are open and social with you. This shows any observing women that you are ok with other women; Therefore, there must be something appealing about you that she would find interesting too. And if you recall from our definition of attraction , having interest is having some sort of attraction. 

Personally, I feel pre-selection is one of the most under rated attraction switches people use.

I think a lot of people think that it is hard to get it, and impossible to fake it. Both are false. I am a big believer in fake it until you make it,  but it also is not hard at all to build a circle of female friends. The trick is  not being the creepy guy nor the emotional tampon. Ill explain more about that later.

The reason why it works to get women attracted to you is because women know instinctively from evolution that they can not depend on how good a man may be for them just from the outside impression a man gives. They know we can fake value and that we do. It’s also a reason they “shit test” us. They need to know that a man has value from some type of other proof. There are many things that can provide that proof, and pre-selection is a very strong one. Pre-selection is a strong one because they see first hand that other women accept you. They see that other girls want you and find you trustworthy. That allows a new female observing this to come to the conclusion that you must be high value and you must be OK for them too. This allows them to put the guard down and go straight to knowing more about you. This is a huge attraction for them.

They see that other girls want you and find you trustworthy

Think about how many men women come across all the time. Think about all the normal barrage of bore they come across at bars and clubs. They see it all, and most men get lumped into that category very fast, unless you can stand out from that group. If you don’t, you have a much harder battle to get even noticed.

Check out this Audio on Preselection Download here

Just imagine this for a moment. Imagine a guy up at the bar either by himself or just standing there with a beer in his hand up by his chest like a predator hunting women. 

Now imagine that same guy with his back against the bar and very comfortable. 2 or three girls looking at him and smiling and laughing at what he is saying. You can see they are giving him their complete attention. Now imagine other guys outside of that circle of people, looking in and watching and talking too.

Now what do you think of these two guys? The guy with three girls talking to him looks much higher value, and there has to be some reason that those girls are spending their time giving him attention. Even more high value that other men are doing the same.

When women see this attention from females to the guy, then it is a sure sign to them that this guy is used to women, has women in his life, and therefore, accepted and wanted by women.

I don’t think I need to tell anyone this, but I think we all know that women want what other women want. It’s a great thing to understand, trust me. Use it to your favor.

So How Can You Use This Pre-selection?

The key to getting good pre-selection is to get yourself a group of platonic girlfriends. I learned a lot about this from Love Systems , they  go into this in great detail in Social Circle Mastery and it can take many, many articles to explain this fully. But for now let’s just say you need to befriend many women and not as the nice guy or the creepy guy. Let’s go back and talk about friend guy and creepy guy very briefly. ( more about these in separate articles).

Nice Guy is the guy that gets a lot of girlfriends but it is not because they respect him or want him. It’s because they use him as an emotional tampon to dump their issues on to like some sort of therapy for them.Or because they think of him as safe and cute like a puppy. You don’t want to be considered cute as a puppy.

Then there is creepy guy, and this is when a guy tries and hits on every girl that is around him, doesn’t use kino (touch) right and goes way past acceptable with it. It basically oozes out he just wants sex in everything he does.

You see the things these two have in common are agendas. They both come at this with an agenda of getting the girl somehow with the friendship. That is creepy. If you are setting out to get girls as friends you need to keep your bad boy edge. You still need to be seen as a possible sexual friend. You just have to make the first move of making them a friend. You need to be fun and exciting, yet you are the one that is making them a friend.

This not only turns the girls on that you are doing this to, it also makes them respect you. They know you are sexual, they know that there is a chance you to could have something, but it’s you that is stopping it. What reason can you use for not wanting to ? It’s easy. The statement of “I’m not good for you, you’re a great girl and I’m not the type of guy a girl like you should get involved with”. Something along these lines played well at the right time will work wonders. Even if there has never been any interest from her to you, you can use this. You simply throw it in as a funny comment at some point, then let it resonate. She will start to think about this all the time. It’s like a cat that can’t get what it wants. It bothers them. This process of them wondering why you chose not to have them will turn around and make them attracted to you.

The key to remember here is unless you really want to go that route with this girl, you need to keep that fish on the line and not reel it in. These girls will eventually understand and then become your best friend. They know it’s not because of them, but that your really just a good guy at heart. Although they may feel that you are just sexual ( which is not a bad thing to have), they will trust you aren’t out to use anyone. You will now be introduced to all of her friends as a great friend.

This is a huge difference e then just being a guy she knows that is trying to date her but can’t man up. Your the guy that put her in the friend zone.

What does this have to do with pre-selection?

Well the more of these you can gather up as friends, the better off you are. Now as you start going out places you will start to run into them all over. If you were smart you would find out what they are all doing on the nights out and arrange that you all meet out, or go out together as a group, or just plain “end up” at the same place.

You will be getting attention from them all night, and trust me, every girl in the place will notice this.

You just got pre-selection….. To Learn much , much more on this and find out exactly why I feel this is the most important aspect you should work on in your game, check out these This course on exactly how to use Pre-Selection go Here

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• Dating A Younger Women And How Most Men Mess Up
• Dating A Younger Woman

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog

If you just got over from a divorce, you may ask,

where should I start

?

What should I do? Well, the first thing you should put into consideration is yourself. Look at yourself, the things you do, the things you are and what you have as a value.

What do I mean by “as Value”?  Well the world works on something called value. Our dollar bill has a value given to it by nothing more than society agreeing that it stands for a certain amount of value. There is nothing behind that dollar that makes it worth any value except what we give it. When you meet people they will size you up based on the value you offer as a person. I am sure that as you are reading this, you may say, no they don’t, or not everyone is like that. Well, on a logical and conscious level you are right. But I am not talking about them overtly thinking about this and making determinations based on logical overt thoughts in their head. It’s a sub conscious process that happens behind the scenes in our heads that is not even noticeable to our minds when we are doing it, but we do it, all of us. It’s a part of human nature and evolution. 

I am not just talking about money or toys or other material things. As a matter of fact it usually has more to do with social value. You have to know that you can make yourself much more valuable to people by improving yourself. To improve ourselves and to give more value to others may sound little outwardly approval seeking, (which is very bad and we will describe in more detail later), but it isn’t what we are talking about here. It’s about not being a stick in the mud and thinking that doing nothing for you is somehow being non approval seeking. We are talking about realizing how the world works at an animalistic level and learning how to become the best we can be for ourselves, not for others. It’s the side benefit of becoming more valuable to others that is the great intangible thing we don’t realize which can help us keep motivated.

It is very important to dive into learning about yourself, your strengths and your weaknesses. Find out where and what you want to do better in it. For our purposes we will assume it is dating and social life. Let’s face it; if you want to be very successful at dating, you have to be better at being social. They come hand in hand and when you get better at them both your life becomes so much better in every way. One factor is attractiveness from the physical appearance perspective. Many in this industry will tell you that looks don’t matter. And I will agree to a certain extent. Yes, you don’t have to be the best looking guy, and as a matter of fact being very good looking can be a disadvantage at most times.

Improving yourself to be the best you can be is a very positive thing for you to do for yourself and for your social life. Become the best you that you can be. This is a very important point here. I am not, and no one should ever, try and compare themselves and rate themselves to others. EVER! It’s not helpful; it is not based in anything that improves you. You are you, and your intricacies are what make you. No one is like you and so there is nothing to compare you with others but your old you. But you can improve a lot about yourself to make a more attractive you. 

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• Dating After Divorce
• How To Attract Women By Building A Better You

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog

In how to attract women by building a better you, there are several things you need to learn and you need to improve, and one of them is Style. Style can make or break you. If you start going out and you look out of place because you just don’t fit in, your social value will plummet. Most girls are very worried about their social value, especially while out at a club. Young women care about who they are seen with. It’s always ok to be with the cool older guy, but not the creepy, out of style older guy.

You need to look like you have a clue on what is trendy. This does not mean you have to spend a lot of money. Trust me; I have learned the hard way that just because you spent a lot on an outfit, doesn’t mean it’s cool. Part of that is getting in better shape. It’s easy to make anything look good if your body looks good.

The key here is to find something that fits you well and is stylish. I do it with V neck t-shirts these days. That seems to be the style, and I am glad because I love the type of shirt. A lot of times my shirts only cost me 6 bucks. Find yourself some nice designer jeans though. These are a must. Make sure they fit well and have good style to them. These might cost a lot, but one or two pairs will be all you need and worth the investment for the times you want to look really sharp. Just make sure to save them for the times you need to look your sharpest.

1.Get your outfits fitted by a tailor. Most shirts are very square. If you go and get the waist brought in more tapered, it will make your body look more tapered, hence, better. It’s all in the fit! Make the outfit fit you the best it can, and this will do wonders.

2.  Get yourself some nice shoes. If you’re going to invest in anything, invest in a few pair of designer jeans and some nice shoes. You need a pair of nice dress shoes, and a few pair of some cool dress down shoes. It always depends on your area and time period but there is always a style of dress shoe that is in, and always a dress down shoe that is in.

3. Belts. Make sure to have some nice belts. Match your shoes! Women look at this stuff    guys.

4. Accessories. Find some accessories that fit the style you want to be. Watches are the most important, followed by a good neck chain of some sort. Stay away from gold. If it’s a v neck t, then it needs to be longer than the V. If it’s a button up, it needs to be shorter.

 The biggest thing about style is you need to look like you pay attention. Look around you; see what cool guys are wearing. What looks good on people? Check out magazines, and TV, and so forth. Just make sure to make it important. It will do wonders for you. No girl wants a guy that looks out of style. Girls want to be proud of you as their man, and that means being proud when they are with you, especially if you’re older, like most of us reading this. 

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• Dating After Divorce
• Dating After Divorce – What To Do First

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog

Needy is the word we use to describe actions that come across as too desperate or too much attention given to someone. For example, you may or may not have had a woman, when you met her she was great, but after about a month of her always wanting to hang out, always checking up on you, she’s not that great anymore. People are like that, women are like that, and men are especially like that. Women aren’t attracted to needy clingy men, and younger women are especially turned off by this type of person.

When you’re with her, it’s her on you and holding you and just coming across way to into you. This is what it comes across to women. For example if you text 5 times and she hasn’t responded, your pretty much in the needy category and you’re done. Walk away.This woman does not want you. You cannot keep trying to steal every second of their time. If it’s you that is asking for time with them all the time, you’re the needy guy. If you’re calling and texting her too much, you’re the needy guy. If you’re answering her text right away, you’re the needy guy. Are you getting it?

Take your time and not be in such a rush to answer her calls or text, blow her off a little. You’re the busy guy and you can’t come across like she is that important to you. I know this may come across as against the grain of “show women you care” and it is. The time to show her you care is later, not now. Especially when your trying to date a younger woman of this age.

You do not do it by suffocating women. Think about what you like for yourself. Women are like little cats, you can’t give them too much attention or they don’t want it. Do not rub the fur the wrong way, let them come for the attention and give it to them and make them purr. Then throw them away and make them want it again. Too much of anything is not wanted by cats or women. This is even more important with young women.

They are bombarded by this type of guy all the time. At the first sign of it women run, they have had this guy before and it just plain freaks them out. They can’t stand it, and they want to stay far away from any guy that reminds them of it. So do not complain about them not wanting to do something, or if they do something with their friends, etc.

They are not thinking relationship when they first meet you and you are throwing yourself into a clinger relationship frame with her. Not good. You need to have a sense of maturity and experience to you, not the opposite. She needs to know you not like the little boys she is not attracted to.

So when you meet this girl and your interaction goes well, and you get the phone number, take your time. Do not make it seem like you are in a rush; do not make it seem that you are too available for her. Even if you are super available don’t act like it, nor let it be known. In all honesty, if you have that much time on your hands, you’re doing something wrong.

Get a hobby or a passion, go out and have fun. When you do that, the rest just falls in place. After you start talking and even after dating and sex, stay the same way. Do not, at all cost, start being needy. Fight your feelings, and let things happen as they do.

Take things slow, and do not rush them. If you want more than just sex, and she seems to want more time with you, and that’s what you want, let it happen by all means, but do not push it. If you’re the one pushing it then it’s not a mutual thing, step back. If you’re just after fun, then it’s even more important. Set up a time to hang out.

Younger women are looking to you becuase she wants a mature man with humor and life expeirence. You can always fake this until you make it to by the way, but you should be developing that as a natural way to your life. Smile confident, even if you aren’t at first.

Do not make it a “date”. Do not think about it as “dating”. Just invite her out to have fun, either just the two of you somewhere, or out with a group. Remember, whatever it is that you do, just make it easy-going, fun, and make it spontaneous. Don’t be too serious, you will come off like her Dad. Don’t try and give her too much advice on life, just listen to her and understand her time period in life.

These are some of the key areas men go wrong when dating younger women, and here are some other articles on dating younger women

Dating a Younger Women 

How To Attract Younger Women

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• Attracting Women – What is Pre-Selection?
• Dating A Younger Woman

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog

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• Do you get nervous during conversations with women or just –completely “blank out”?

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• Have you settled for less attractive women because it’s just too hard for you — to get the ones you really want?

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MONSTER CONFIDENCE SUBLIMINAL MESSAGING UTILIZIES ALPHA AND THETA WAVES: BETA WAVES – 14Hz to 20Hz. Beta waves are associated with normal consciousness. They are present during every day activies. ALPHA WAVES – 8Hz to 13Hz. Alpha waves are likened to a light meditation. They are prevalent when you daydream. THETA WAVES – 4Hz to 7Hz. Theta waves occur during heightened states of creativity and are found with a deep meditative state.

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The NLP techniques used in this program are an extraordinarily effective and rapid form of psychological therapy. NLP helps you overcome…

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• The Ultimate Online Dating Playbook For Men
• The Date Mentors Program

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog

1. When dating Chinese women they rarely show their true character until after a great deal of time, sometimes not even until after marriage! This is due to a culture where the peer pressure is very high. Working out her true character before-hand is therefore a must.

2. When Chinese women are attracted to a man they will do things indirectly (much more so than a western female) to show their attraction, but without knowing the cues and signs it may pass you by. One example is if she advises you to take care of your health, or when the weather is changing to wear more clothes. This is not simply a throw-away statement on her part, as it is in western culture: she is trying to show her feelings are deeper than just simply friendship.

3. A Chinese brides expectation of marriage is based on her own culture and not necessarily yours. Don’t assume that she knows what marriage is like in your country or what will be expected of her just because you’ve heard that Chinese girls are ‘traditional’. In actual fact, the more traditional they are considered in Chinese culture, the less likely they will be able to adapt to you or your country. (note: Just because they say they are traditional, it doesn’t necessarily mean they are by the way)

4. Chinese women are seldom submissive after you really get to know them. The submissive nature you may see in the beginning months (or sometimes even years) is simply a cultural affectation that may gradually disappear and be replaced by her true character, which can be anything from generous, loving and kind, to selfish, bossy and materialistic. Find out what it truly is beforehand.

5. When dating Chinese girls the etiquette is frequently over-emphasized by them where non-Chinese males are concerned, and many suddenly become ‘ultra-traditional’, whereas with a Chinese male before, they may not have been. Breaking down this facade is therefore ‘a must’, as it can cause untold complications otherwise. Until that time you should follow the accepted Chinese dating etiquette.

6. To attract or marry a Chinese woman you must demonstrate ‘stability’, among other things. If you have a history of short term relationships it’s almost certainly best not to mention it. Even if they were when you were eighteen years old; she will simply assume you are not a good bet, and dependent on age, will be very unlikely to consider a relationship with you, no matter short-term or long-term. The majority of Chinese males I know keep their relationship history secret, and with good reason too!

7. Not all Chinese brides consider love to be an important factor in their marriage choice. Culturally in China, love and marriage have only recently become linked, and it is still far from being the norm in China. If you ask a Chinese woman you are dating or considering marriage to, if she loves you, she will almost always say “yes”. This does not however necessarily mean she is thinking of the same kind of love you are thinking of. Chinese people frequently think of the word ‘love’ as almost a verb, as in if they act loving towards you and do loving things, it is sometimes equal in their minds to love. Make sure you are both on the same wavelength first if that is important to you, and learn how to find the right one….

allow me to tell you a little about myself, my names’ Sam Reeves and I have lived and worked in China for over eight years now, as a manager for a multi-national blue-chip Chinese company. Navigating the business world in China was one thing, what with huge cultural differences, and the complexity of penetrating the Chinese mind-set, I was challenged to find solutions to problems between western and Chinese thinking and etiquette, and it was no mean feat let me tell you!

But my biggest challenge was dating Chinese women and also marrying a Chinese bride! As well as being married in China, I’d also dated Chinese women in my own country before. But NOTHING prepared me for the complexity of attracting, dating and marrying a Chinese woman, although the benefits were great it was a real learning curve…

I wasted huge amounts of time and money trying to find ‘the one’, yet there always seemed to be things about the Chinese women I was with that would blind-side me, even after years.

Amongst many other surprising situations were the woman who turned out to be another mans mistress, the woman who just wouldn’t commit in any way shape or form, yet kept hinting that she might; not to mention the usual selection of gold diggers and passport hunters that kept me busy before I worked out…

..The Hidden A, B, C of Chinese Culture & Attraction and how to spot ‘the wrong one’ a mile off!

Now, I don’t want you thinking I’m useless with women or something, because in my own country I did OK, Perhaps like you, I just always had a fascination with Chinese women.

But I found the usual rules and expectations of a relationship with a Chinese woman were almost totally different than what I had expected.

Even a lot of the stuff I read online didn’t help me much with the usual courting and dating etiquette; not to mention the subject of marriage.

I realized after many false starts and much wasted time (and money for that matter) that I could break it down into certain Chinese female character types in order to always end up with ‘the right one’. Not only that, I learned exactly how to attract almost any Chinese woman with the words I’d say and many, many other methods….

All you need to do is read ‘Chinese Dating Secrets Exposed’ and follow my winning system, I’ve done all the other work for you and laid it out in an easy to understand fashion.

many men fail with Chinese women or end up with one that just bleeds them dry in one way or another…

Recommended Reading

• Evan Hawk Dating
• The Ultimate Online Dating Playbook For Men
• The Date Mentors Program

a post from: Evan Hawk on Dating and Social Dynamics/blog