Even Happier

5 things you could do to kill the Mafia

2008-02-24T19:32:32Z

As a little kid growing up in Palermo (Sicily), I used to dream of chasing the Bad Guys who were terrorizing my beautiful city.

In my teens, I started to consider the idea of stopping the Mafia one of those naive dreams that could never become a reality.

But now, for the first time in the last 20 years, there is a concrete possibility to kill the Sicilian Mafia, ending its presence in Italy, in USA, and everywhere else it operates, thus improving the lives of thousands of people around the world. And your help is needed, so listen up.

Sicily. Maybe the last place in the world where you can find yourself having lunch next to Armani or Madonna in an inexpensive restaurant overlooking a turquoise sea. Unfortunately, a land still plagued with organized crime, which protects tourists – they bring money to the local economy – but merciless target local business owners, demanding a large share of their revenue in exchange for "Protection."

Locals call the extortion racket “Pizzo”, and experts agree that this criminal activity is Mafia’s core business, bringing in a steady cash flow which finances its worldwide operations. But “Pizzo” offers much more than just a large financial gain: the protection racket is Mafia’s way to affirm its control over a city, sending the message "I own this place, so you must give me a share of anything you earn, and you must ask my approval for anything you do."

The extortion racket has flourished for decades with the Italian business organization Confindustria secretly telling his associate to comply with Mafia's financial requests: “If we all pay” they used to say “We will all pay less.”

Recently, things have started changing for the better:
- The association of Italian business owner is now expelling from its ranks anyone who pays the “Pizzo.”
- Police has been very successful in taking into custody Mafia bosses, whilst at the same time confiscating Mafia's financial assets.
- Business owner who have said no to Pizzo are increasingly joining an association called AddioPizzo (Goodbye Pizzo) which put them in contact with thousands of Sicilians who are tired of the Mafia and are willing to buy only mob-free products.

The association AddioPizzo is really hitting the Mafia where it hurts, and its leaders now lives in constant danger of a terrible retribution: their popularity is their only defense, since Mafia knows that if AddioPizzo leaders were killed today, thousands of people would take the street in protest, and new stronger leaders would inevitably emerge. So everything depends on national and international attention: the moment we forget about AddioPizzo, Mafia will destroy them without too much fuss, maybe killing a few and spreading negative rumors about the others.

Considering the goal it pursues, AddioPizzo has yet to receive a decent level of International media attention: only a bunch of articles from BBC, Telegraph, Herald Tribune and The Independent, and then nothing else.

Silence is Mafia's natural ally, so please talk about what's happening. Pick one or more activities from the following list and dedicate the next five minutes to it:
1- Write your name on AddioPizzo guestbook to publicly express your support for this brave organization.
2- Help AddioPizzo with a donation. It can be very safely done via PayPal and you get an email confirmation at the end of the process.
3- If you write on a Blog, a Newspaper on any other media, please talk about the possibility of killing the Mafia: nothing scares the Mob more than people not being afraid of it.
4- Alternatively, please Digg this article, review it on StumbleUpon or save it on Delicious. Let’s have as many people as possible knowing that together we can kill the Mafia.
5- If a friend of yours is planning an holiday in Sicily, make sure he’ll sleep only in a beautiful Pizzo-free hotel, such as Addaura Residence or Amarcord Hotel. If you want to try typical Sicilian wine or food, make sure you’ll buy it only from a pizzo free online portals such as Buona Sicilia, and let them know that you are purchasing from them because you’ve read that they are pizzo-free. In short, let’s make sure that Pizzo-free business increase their sales, so they can have an added incentive to stay clean. (The growing list of businesses who have publicly said no to the Mafia is here.) In fact, anyone who speak out against the Mob should be protected and rewarded. So long life to AddioPizzo, and long life to you.

Born Happy?

2008-01-20T13:49:30Z

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from bestselling author and Psychology Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky.

“To change one’s life, start immediately, do it flamboyantly, no exceptions.”
– William James, “father” of psychology

I have two friends, Mark and Brian, and one of them is a lot happier than the other.

Mark is chronically unhappy. He is often glum, frequently irritable, and sometimes hopeless, though he has never been clinically depressed. By contrast, Brian is a remarkably happy person. Although he has his low moments and periodic stress, he manages to find joy in his days and is quite content with the way his life is going. To understand why these two men are so different, let me tell you a little bit about them.

Both are in their early 40s and doing well in their careers. Brian is a professor of psychology at a prestigious university, who has reasonably bright students, a fair amount of autonomy in his work, and many opportunities for travel. His research program has been successful, garnering attention from all over the U.S. Mark is a deputy city attorney in a small but beautiful city right on the Pacific Ocean. He specializes in landlord-tenant disputes and other civil matters, and his success as a litigator has led to occasional media appearances, in which he is asked to speak about his latest cases. He gets a kick out of doing that.

Both have close-knit families. Mark is married to Dena, whom he met while on sabbatical in the Netherlands, and they have 3-year old twin boys. Brian is married to Karen. They started dating in law school, and now have a boy (age 6) and a girl (age 3).

Both men own homes in the suburbs of a major metropolitan area, about half an hour from the city and their jobs.

So, why is Brian happier than Mark? Was he simply lucky to be born with a sunnier disposition? Or, is he more fortunate with regard to the events and circumstances of his life?

Knowing them, I would be hard-pressed to assert that the life situation of one is clearly superior to the other. On balance, neither seems to have the better job, wife, kids, house, or car. Furthermore, scientific research has shown that prosperity, health, and physical attractiveness are only minimally related to one’s overall happiness. For example, a study by Ed Diener from the University of Illinois demonstrated that the richest Americans – those earning more than $10 million annually – report levels of personal happiness only slightly greater than the people who work for them. So, even if Mark had fewer of life’s “goods,” this shortfall wouldn’t explain his unhappiness.

What about genetics? Growing research done with identical and fraternal twins suggests that each person is born with a particular “happiness set point” – that is, a baseline or potential for happiness to which he or she is bound to return, even after major setbacks or triumphs. The set point for happiness is similar to the set point for weight. Some people are blessed with a “skinny disposition.” Even when they’re not trying, they easily maintain their weight. By contrast, others have to work extraordinarily hard to keep their weight at a desirable level and the moment they slack off even a bit, the pounds creep back on. So, Brian may simply possess a higher set point for happiness, a higher potential for well-being. He doesn’t have to work hard at it – he just is happy.

So if Brian’s happiness is due to genetics, what is left for Mark to do? Are we all doomed to obey the directives of our genes?

The answer is “no.” I am an experimental social psychologist who has conducted the first controlled experimental intervention studies to increase and maintain a person’s happiness level over and above his or her set point. In broadest terms, this research suggests that sustainable happiness is attainable regardless of genetics, if one is prepared to do the work. Much like permanent weight loss and fitness, becoming lastingly happier demands making some permanent changes, requiring effort and commitment every day of one’s life.

My two colleagues – Ken Sheldon at the University of Missouri and David Schkade at UC San Diego – and I developed a theory that describes the most important factors determining happiness. In sum, we argue that the set point determines just 50% of happiness, while a mere 10% can be attributed to differences in people’s life circumstances – that is, whether they are rich or poor, healthy or unhealthy, married or divorced, etc. This leaves a surprising 40% of our capacity for happiness within our power to change: Mark can be a great deal happier, and Brian could be even happier too.

Below, I describe some of the happiness-increasing strategies that have the greatest potential in lastingly elevating happiness. Note that you do not need to attempt the entire list of happiness activities, but should choose to focus only on the one to four strategies that “fit” you best – the ones that seem most natural and enjoyable to you.

- Counting Your Blessings
One way to practice this strategy is with a “gratitude journal” in which you write down the 3 to 5 things for which you are currently thankful – from the mundane (your flowers are finally in bloom) to the magnificent (your child’s first steps). Do this once a week, say, on Sunday night. Keep the strategy fresh by varying your entries and how you express them as much as possible. And if there’s a particular person who has been kind or influential in your life, don’t wait to express your appreciation. Write them a letter now, or, if possible, visit and thank them in person.

- Practicing Acts of Kindness
These should be both random (let the dad with the crying baby go ahead of you at the check-out counter) and systematic (read a newspaper to an elderly neighbor). Being kind to others, whether friends or strangers, triggers a cascade of positive effects – it makes you feel compassionate and capable, gives you a greater sense of connection with others and earns you smiles, approval and reciprocated kindness. These are all happiness boosters.

- Nurturing Optimism
This strategy involves such practices as looking at the bright side, finding the silver lining in a negative event, noticing what’s right (rather than what’s wrong), feeling good about one’s future and the future of the world, or simply feeling that you can get through the day. One way to practice this strategy is to sit in a quiet place and take 20 to 30 minutes to think about and write down what you expect your life to be 10 years from now. Imagine that everything has gone as well as it possibly could. You have worked hard and succeeded at accomplishing all of your life goals. Think of this as the realization of all of your life dreams. Then, write about what you imagined.

- Learning to Forgive
Let go of anger, resentment, and feelings of vengeance by writing – but, not sending – a letter of forgiveness to a person who has hurt or wronged you. The inability to forgive is associated with persistent rumination or dwelling on revenge, while forgiving allows you to move on.

- Increasing “Flow” Experiences
When you’re so absorbed in what you’re doing that you don’t notice the passage of time, you are in a state called “flow,” a term coined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. So, become fully engaged at work, at home, and at play. Try to increase the number of flow experiences in your life, whether it’s completing a project at the office, playing with your children, or enjoying a hobby. Seek work and leisure activities that engage your skills and expertise.

- Investing in Relationships
One of the biggest factors in happiness appears to be strong personal relationships. Indeed, having the support of someone who deeply cares about you is one of the best remedies for unhappiness. Thus, this strategy involves putting effort into healing, cultivating, and enjoying your relationships with family and friends. Act with love, be as kind to the people close to you as you are to strangers, affirm them, share with them, and play together.

- Avoiding Overthinking
Remember the book, Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff? There’s a time to think about the bad stuff in your life, but dwelling on your problems excessively is unhealthy. Very happy people have the capacity – even during trying times like a parent’s chronic illness – to absorb themselves in an engaging activity, stay busy, and have fun. To practice this strategy, pick a distracting, attention-grabbing activity that has compelled you in the past and do it when you notice yourself dwelling.

- Savoring Life’s Joys
Pay close attention and take delight in momentary pleasures, wonders, and magical moments. Focus on the sweetness of a ripe mango, the aroma of a bakery, or the warmth of the sun when you step out from the shade. Some psychologists suggest taking “mental photographs” of pleasurable moments to review in less happy times.

- Taking Care of Your Soul
Studies show that religious and spiritual people are happier and healthier than others, though researchers don’t yet know why. Perhaps the social support of belonging to a close-knit religious group is valuable, as is the sense of meaning and purpose that comes from believing in something greater than yourself. If you are so inclined, join a church, temple, or mosque; read a spiritually-themed book; or volunteer for a faith-based charity.

- Committing to Your Goals
People who strive for something significant, whether it’s learning a new craft or raising moral children, are far happier than those who don’t have strong dreams or aspirations. Find a happy person and you will find a project. However, being dedicated to any pursuit won’t make you happy if you’re just doing it for superficial reasons such as making money, boosting your ego, or succumbing to peer pressure.

- Using Your Body: Exercise, Meditation, Smiling, and Rest
Getting plenty of sleep, exercising, stretching, meditating, smiling and laughing can all enhance your mood in the short term and promote energy and strong mental health. Practiced regularly, they can help make your daily life more satisfying and increase long-term happiness.

The secrets to happiness are simple to learn, but not simple to carry out. However, with determined effort and commitment, anyone can learn practices and habits that will help them achieve levels of happiness over and above their set point and – even more important – to maintain those levels. You shouldn’t just “pursue” happiness – you should “construct” or “create” it yourself.

BIO:
Sonja Lyubomirsky (A.B., summa cum laude, Harvard; Ph.D., Stanford) is Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Riverside. She is a winner of the Templeton Positive Psychology Prize. Her book, The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want (Penguin Press) was released in January 2008.

How to increase your self-esteem

2007-12-24T16:22:54Z

I’m Ugly.

Actually, I’m not, but there was a time in which I was convinced of being fat and unattractive.

People would tell me I was only slightly overweight, but I would not believe them: all I could see in the mirror was my big belly.

In time, I changed the way I think about myself, and I learned to take better care of my body: I was a good looking man after all, and women began to notice…

Today, I’m happily married with an intelligent and beautiful woman: I know that without my increased self-esteem I would have never approached her in the first place, and I would have rationalised my inaction by thinking she was probably silly and superficial – in other words, boring – as some good looking girls are.

And what about you? Do you ever feel stupid, ugly, nerdy, or dull? The following list of tips will give you practical ways to improve your self-esteem. I have split the list in three sections: pick the one that suits you best.

If you are all about doing…

- Change friends. If those around you keep bringing you down, consider finding other people to hang out with.

- Voluntary work. Voluntary work is a great way to feel good about yourself whilst helping others in the process.

- Act as if. Imagine a moment in the future when you’ve got what you wanted. What do you see? Is the sound of your voice any different? What is your posture? How are you dressed? Now bring your awareness back to the present moment and behave as if you already got what you wanted.

- Modelling. Find someone who is already confident in the area which interest you and copy them. Model as many of their behaviors, attitudes, values, and beliefs for the context you want to be confident in as you can. How can you do this? Talk with them if you have access to them. If you don’t have access to them, get as much exposure to them as you can.

If you are in touch with your feelings…

- Feel good movies. There are some films which make you feel at peace with who you are. You feel moved by them, inspired, and happy. My favourite one in 2007 is HairSpray , what’s yours?

- Random Acts of Kindness. Probably the easiest and cheapest way to feel good!

- Self-help tools. Blogs, software, online resources, and so forth: there’s a lot of good stuff out there – and lots of bad stuff too… Have fun discovering what works for you!

- Accept compliments. When I thought I was ugly, I did not believe to people telling me I was good looking, and I was sure they were saying it just to be nice. In general, if you hold a negative belief about yourself, you won’t be receptive to people praising you in that area. Next time someone pays you a compliment, make sure you actually hear it.

- Seek help. Counseling, coaching, pshichotherapy, mentoring or talking with your priest. Go for anything that works for you, but do chose something: we all need advice, and friends and family are often too close to be objective.

If you are a detailed thinker…

- Bibliotherapy. Books can help you improving your life. There’s no problem or life situation which hasn’t been already experienced, examined, and written about: it’s worth reading about it in a book or in a blog.

- Who are you comparing yourself with? Models look good for a living: compare yourselves to normal people, and you’ll have a more objective view of yourself. In general, remember to compare yourself with people less gifted than you are.

- Disarm the internal negative voice. There’s a negative voice which keeps bringing you down. To disarm it, imagine a volume control and lower the volume. Or how about changing the internal voice to Mickey Mouse? Do you think you could take Mickey Mouse seriously if he were criticizing you? Finally, if Mickey Mouse insists on saying bad things about yourself, try a little disputing.

- List the benefits of an improved self-esteem. A good way to fire up you desire to change, is having a full picture of all the positive things you will be bringing into your life, and of all of the negative ones you will be moving away from.

- Make the Most of Success. Low self-esteem requires a particular attitude towards success: whenever you succeed at something, you must either forget about it, or quickly write it off' as good luck, chance, or someone else's responsibility. To gain a more realistic view of yourself, celebrate every little accomplishment, and make sure you take appropriate credit for your successes.

See also:
The 7 beliefs of the super-happy people

How to stop worrying

2007-12-02T09:50:18Z

“At least a portion of your mind is really kind of stupid. If it had an innate intelligence, it would remind you of the things you needed to do only when you could do something about them.” [David Allen - Getting Things Done]

In his famous book, David Allen says we often worry at very inappropriate times:
- You are having a nice dinner, and in the back of your mind you’re worrying about tomorrow’s meeting.
- You are enjoying a well deserved holiday, but you can’t stop thinking of what you’ll need to do when you get back home.

In order increase both productivity and peace of mind, Allen proposes a comprehensive method for “Getting Thing Done,” which could help you becoming more effective.

On the other hand  if you don’t worry just of your to-do list  Allen’s book will be of limited help in calming your mind: you need other tools to deal with other kinds of worries.

So what are you worrying about? Take a look at the following list, and see if you recognize yourself at least in one of the 7 worrier profiles. I’ll then describe a set of strategies which you can use to reduce your worries.

1- To-Dos worrier. You often think of work-related tasks when you are at home, or at a time when you can’t do anything about them. The number of personal and business activities you are carrying on feels daunting, and you have the impression that you might forget something important.

2- Frequent worrier. Frequent worries and fears distract you from your day-to-day activities, and you are troubled by a feeling that something bad is going to happen.

3- Social worrier. You are afraid of being seen negatively by others and sometime you avoid social activities for fear of humiliation.

4- Separation worrier. You constantly worry about your loved ones when they are away.

5- Obsessive worrier. You have unwanted thoughts or behaviors that seem impossible to stop or control. You may be troubled by obsessions  such as a recurring worry that you forgot to turn off the oven  or by scary thoughts which make you feel dirty. You may occasionally suffer from uncontrollable compulsions, such as washing your hands over and over.

6- Phobic worrier. You have unrealistic or exaggerated fear of a specific object, activity, or situation that in reality presents little or no danger. Common phobias include fear of animals such as snakes and spiders, fear of flying, and fear of heights.

7- Post-traumatic worrier. Bad stuff has happened to you, and it keeps coming back. You might experience flashbacks, nightmares, and intrusive memories. Sometime you feel detached, uninterested, and emotionally numb. You generally avoid activities, people, and places that remind you of the trauma. Occasionally, you experience difficulties in concentrating and going to sleep.

Do you recognize yourself at least in one of the 7 types of worriers? If you do, the strategies below will help you calming your mind. Pick your favorite one and use it today.

- Write it down! The simple act of writing down what’s burdening you will make you feel instantly relieved.

- Put your worries in a box. Write down your worries on a piece of paper and lock them in a box. If you feel you must absolutely worry a little, take the paper back, ruminate on your problem, and then put your worry back in the box where it belongs to.

- Get things done. Find your ideal system of getting things done and use it regularly. David Allen’s book and Leo Babuta’s blog will point you in the right direction.

- What are you feeling? You think a thousand thoughts every day. Feelings tell you which thoughts really matter, so if you are not in touch with what you feel, you might mistakenly believe that everything that crosses your mind is worthy of a detailed investigation… When the worry strikes, concentrate on your feelings: are you mad, sad, scared or glad?

- Do something. Find an engaging task which requires your full attention, and focus your energies on completing it quickly and well. The task should require a certain level of skill to be performed.

- Set aside specified time and place to worry. Limit worry and obsession only to those times, and only when you are in your chosen worry place. The worry place must be difficult to access  definitely neither your bed nor your desk at work.

- Disputing. You can monitor and then argue against the negative things that you say to yourself. Prof. Martin Seligman calls it disputing, and he has successfully used it as cognitive treatment of depression. In fact, you can use disputing to reduce and stop negative thoughts related to any unpleasant events which have happened in your life. When something bad happens, there are three dangerous things you might say to yourself:
  ● “It’s all my fault!” If you always feel personally responsible for everything bad that happens to you, then you might want to ask yourself a question: could it always be your fault? Whilst it pays to learn from mistake, you shouldn’t blame yourself for something which wasn’t your fault.
  ● “It will never change!” Maybe you got laid off, but that doesn’t mean that you will never find a new job, or that you will always be fired. Things can change for the better.
  ● “It is going to undermine everything I do!” If you have an argument with your girlfriend, that doesn’t mean you have to argue with your boss too. A problem in a specific area of your life doesn’t need to affect everything else.

- Thought Replacement. When an unwanted thought enters your mind, replace it with a healthy and rational one. For example, if you think “My girlfriend has left me because I am unlovable”, you can use disputing to substitute this thought with a more rational one such as: “My girlfriend has left me because we have very different interests and passions.”

- Image Replacement. If you have a tendency to visualize negative images, experiment with replacing such negative images with positive ones.

- Aversive Replacements. If you have a tendency to think of an unhealthy behavior in an acceptable manner, try replacing these acceptable images with negative ones. For example, thoughts of cigarettes could be replaced by "cancer sticks'' or "coffin nails.''

- Thought Stopping. When thinking an unwanted thought, immediately yell STOP. The yell can be out loud or only in your mind. Continue yelling STOP until the unwanted thought ceases. Experiment with visualizing a stop sign, and with combining thought stopping with other techniques.

Do you like this post or not? Either way, I would really appreciate it if you could review it on StumbleUpon

Disclaimer: EvenHappier.com is no substitute for individually tailored professional advice.

How to Command Respect

2007-11-04T08:15:57Z

Some people are always listened to. What they say matter, and everyone pays attention whenever they speak.

Why is that so? There’s an air of authority about their every words and actions, which helps them in getting their point across, when others would not even be heard.

In short, they are who you and I would call “Natural Leaders.”

I am not one of those people – I wasn’t born super-confident – so I took some time to study man and women who naturally command respect, in order to learn their secrets and get the results I wanted in my own life.

The experiment has worked well: today my behavior has changed - though I’m still me - and I have finally been offered the job I had been wanting for the last three years.

I should come clean with you – I haven’t discovered any secrets… – only well known habits which increase their effectiveness exponentially when applied all together.

If you are not a “Natural Leader”, the good news is that a confident behavior can be learned: read the tips below and start immediately to practice those which feel ok with you. Results will soon follow...

Posture
- Stand tall: keeping your shoulders pushed back will lend you an air of confidence.
- Spread your weight evenly on both feet instead of leaning only on one.
- Try standing with your arms crossed behind your back. Your shoulders will get pulled back automatically.
- Don’t stand with your hands on your hips if you don’t want to come across as confrontational.
- Don’t lean against walls or tables. You’ll appear tired and lazy.

What are you looking at?
- Look directly at the person you are talking to in order to exude confidence. If you turn away from the person you’re talking to in the middle of the conversation, you’ll show you’re not interested.
- Look straight in front of you: looking down might be interpreted as shyness, looking slightly upward could be perceived as arrogance. Finally, if you wear glasses, don’t look over the rim. It makes you look condescending.
- Don’t look at your watch unless you want to appear as if you’re in a rush.
- Don’t rub your eyes with your hands: it signals disbelief at the situation.
- Keeping your eyes on the door will show that you’re ready to leave the room.

When you are sitting…
- Sit straight so that your shoulders almost touch the back of your chair.
- Rest your hands on the arms of your chair, place them on your knees, or fold them on your lap so that they are not a distraction.
- Make sure your chair is positioned so you’re facing the person you’re talking to. This will show that you’re engaged in what they are saying.
- Lean slightly forward to appear interested in a conversation and stress what you’re saying.
- Don’t tilt your chair back so that it’s standing on two legs. This shows a very casual, laid back attitude and does not earn you respect. You also run the risk of looking silly when you accidentally fall backwards.
- Stretching your legs out shows you’re too relaxed and may also invade others’ personal space.
- Never put your feet up on the desk in front of you. You don’t want to come across as condescending.

Head and Face
- Tilting your head to one side during a conversation shows you’re interested and thinking about what’s being said.
- Be sure to nod your head so the person you’re speaking with knows you’re listening and interested.
- A blank face conveys either disinterest or a lack of understanding.

What are you doing with your hands?
- If seated, place your hands on armrest or on your laps ; if standing still, try holding your hands behind your back. Break such standard position whenever needed, and then return to it as soon as you can. - Open, face-up palms signal honesty and straightforwardness.
- Gesturing with your arms can help you making a point, but doing it excessively can became distracting.
- Make sure your palms are clean and dry. Sweaty palms indicate nervousness and are a turn off for most people.
- Never point at someone, be it the person talking to you or anyone else in the room. It’s rude.
- Don’t scratch your head. You’ll come across as being unsure of yourself.
- Don’t tap your fingers on a table or arms of a chair; you’ll seem anxious.
- Don’t run your fingers through your hair. It shows frustration.
- Never bite your nails. It will make you seem nervous.
- Don’t fidget with objects lying on the table in front of you.
- Don’t sit with your palms on your cheeks. It shows you’re deep in thought about something else.
- Do not wipe your palms on your clothing. Use a handkerchief instead.
- Don’t play or fidget with your mobile phone when someone’s talking to you. It shows avoidance and a lack of interest.
- Don’t touch your nose, play with your hair, or rub your eyes when you’re being asked for an honest answer. They’re all signs that say you’re lying.
- Keep your fingernails clean. Close cropped nails show you’re neat and orderly, but if you prefer to wear them long, make sure they’re groomed neatly.

Last but not Least…
- If the situation calls for paperwork, be sure to keep your papers in order with easy access to avoid looking disorganized.
- Removing your tie, top button, or jacket to indicate you’re getting comfortable in your surroundings.
- Open doors and allow others to walk before you.
- Cough and sneeze into your hands or a handkerchief, not into the face of the people around you.
- Additionally, try videotaping your actions so you can find out where you’re going wrong. I know, it sound weird, but it is amazingly effective.
- Look good. You don’t have to be conventionally handsome or beautiful; it’s enough to dress neatly in clothes that suit both you and the occasion.
- Smell good. Use deodorant and perfume, but go easy on it. You don’t want to overpower the room with your scent.
- Wear footwear that allows you to walk comfortably to avoid making a fool of yourself.
- Avoid revealing, dirty or wrinkled clothing.
- And finally, remember to smile. Smiles are contagious :-)

Adapted from www.insidecrm.com/blog

The Simple Rules of Life

2007-10-21T06:57:40Z

You have a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for as long as you live. How you take care of it - or fail to take care of it - can make an enormous difference to the quality of your life.

You learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time, informal school called Life. Each day, you will be presented with opportunities to learn what you need to know. The lessons presented are often completely different from those you think you need.

There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error and experimentation. You can learn as much from failure as you can from success. I know you have heard this many times, and that's because it is true.

A lesson is repeated until it is learned. Each lesson is presented to you in various forms until you have learned it.

Learning lessons does not end. There is no stage of life that does not contain some lessons. As long as you live there will be something more to learn.

Others are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself. When tempted to criticize others, ask yourself why you feel so strongly.

What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you create with those tools and resources is up to you.

The answers lie inside of you. The answer to life’s eternal questions lie within your grasp. All you need to do is ask, look, listen and receive.

Adapted from an article on westhartfordcounselingcenter.com

Global warming is already cool, so a little more Hairspray could really help…

2007-10-14T03:37:23Z

I am not a cool kid.

I mean, If you ask my friends about it, first they’ll tell you some of the cool things I’ve done - like composing a hit song and singing it on Top Of The Pops - but eventually they’ll agree that my usual behavior prevents me from gaining any serious cool credo.

The fact is that I don’t feel ashamed easily, and if I feel like it, I might dance like tarantula bitten man, whilst wearing very unlikely items of clothing…

For most of my life, I have considered the idea of coolness superficial & fake: a restriction on my freedom which I could never tolerate.

What was the point of being cool anyway? Everyone wanted to be cool, so I could get more attention by breaking the social norm which defined coolness.

As a teenager, I couldn’t see that the coolness-factor has the power to put the spotlight on a worthy cause: make it cool and everyone will talk about it, make it cool and we’ll all want a piece of the action.

Global warming is a perfect example. For decades the situation has been urgent and getting worse (see graph), but the issue wasn’t getting much attention. And then… Green becomes Sexy, recycling gains a hip aura, the Inconvenient Truth is a blockbuster, Toyota Prius sells like crazy, and global warming is on everyone’s mind! There is still a lot to do to actually save our little planet, but now that even Bush is becoming concerned about carbon emission, I say the sky is the limit!

What would you like to be different in the world around you? Make it cool, and you’ll really help your cause, share any information which can increase its coolness-factor, and you’ll be helping society to make a positive change.

Personally, I can’t stand the anorexic & ill look which is considered trendy in fashion and advertisement. I mean, being naturally skinny is great, but healthy looking women with “something to hug”? That’s even better.

We are letting corporations tell us how we should look, and the result is big mess in which unhealthy is cool and healthy is passe’. I can tell you that nobody is getting any happier in the process… I badly want healthy looking women to feel super-cool as they are, and I want advertisement, cinema, and television to show us a more varied ideal of individual beauty. And that’s why I was so happy to see Hairspray. If you haven’t seen the latest John Travolta’s movie, you gotta run the cinema as fast as you can! Travolta’s performance isn’t particularly exceptional, but everything else is. The film is a new classic: it makes you laugh, and it makes you cry, and amidst all of the entertainment, it lets you experience timeless truths about human nature.

If you also think that healthy-looking-women are cool, and if you want corporations&media to hear your voice, please drop me an email now: I would like to tell you about a little plan I have, which badly needs your help if it’s ever to see the light….

I would really appreciate it if you could write a short review of this post on StumbleUpon. You could also email it to a friend, or add it to any social bookmarking site you currently use

How to increase your sexual drive

2007-10-07T06:01:21Z

A stronger sexual drive can improve your overall experience of sex, and in turn benefit all aspects of your daily life.

Performance anxiety will become a thing of the past, and you'll be able to fully enjoy every lovemaking session.

The list below is packed with powerful tips: if one of them is not applicable to you, simply skip it and move to the next one.

1. Know what you need, and make sure you get it. “The fantasy model of sex dictates that men should be able to function and presumably enjoy sex without any special requirements. The fact is that we all have requirements and conditions.” says Dr Bernie Zilbergeld in "The New Male Sexuality". In short, the idea that an adult man is always instantly ready for sex is plain wrong.

So what could be your “requirement and conditions”? Well, you might need to be rested, not too stressed, and maybe even emotionally close to your woman, before you can thoroughly enjoy sex. You could also have more specific requirements such as having the light off or not using a condom. In many cases you will need to find a compromise with your partner, so that everyone’s need can be met.

When you have what you need, the experience of making love can be a very fulfilling one, and the best part is that such positive experience can in turn stimulate your sexual drive, creative a virtuous cycle of constantly increasing pleasure.

2. Relax. Imagine for a moment that an intruder is breaking into your house while you are making love to your partner. The arousal disappear immediately: there are more urgent things to attend… In a similar way, it is difficult to feel sexual when you're stressed about paying bills and meeting a deadline at work. Part of that is because stress is a distraction — it's hard to focus or enjoy sex when part of you is thinking of something else. In addition, when stress strikes, the hormone cortisol goes up, temporarily altering your hormonal equilibrium, hence affecting your sexual drive.

There are many ways to relax – such as yoga, physical activity, hot bath, reading,... – and you probably know already what’s the best one for you. Make such activity your daily ritual, an important and enjoyable tasks which you never forget.

Sex can also be a great way to relax, and yet you don't have to be too stressed to fully enjoy it...

3. Rest. There are times in which all you need is a good night's sleep. So don’t be lured into doing something else...

4. Improve your relationship. Resentment is the number one relationship issue that affects arousal and orgasm. All of the buried anger toward your partner can throw a wet blanket on passion. A common cliché would have men as sexual animals completely unaffected by emotions. It might be true for some man, but certainly not for everyone.

5. Kill routine in the bedroom. An extremely well known advice, and yet one which is worth repeating here: in a long term relationship, if you let sex become boring, your libido for it is certainly going down.

6. Change you medications. Antidepressants such as Prozac or Paxil are one of the best-known offenders for low sexual drive. Other culprits include prescription blood-pressure-lowering drugs, which can interfere with nerve signals, and antihistamines.

7. Look after your health. Health problems such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, thyroid disorders and autoimmune disorders like lupus can all change a man’s sexual desire by affecting blood flow, nerve signals and hormone levels. Finally, depression is well known for dramatically affecting your sexual drive.

8. Improve your body image. If you don’t really like the way you look when naked, enjoying sex becomes more difficult. You can learn to like the way you look with counselling and psychotherapy or you could partly change the way you look with an exercise program. Alternatively, you could do both things, achieving even greater results.

9. Aphrodisiac and supplements. L-arginine is a particularly important amino acid for overall circulatory health and is sold as natural supplement for sexual health. L-arginine has been proven to help increase blood flow to the penis, much like Viagra does, and the difference is it does it naturally. Two other great products for male libido are Ginseng, used in China as a sexual tonic for over 7000 years, and Gingko Bilbao, which is used to improve blood flow around the body including to the genitals. You can also find a comprehensive lists of "aphrodisiacs" here

The following three advices must be always evaluated with the assistance of a doctor

10. Testosterone cream. If a blood analysis tells you that your testosterone level is low, then a topical testosterone cream could increase your sexual drive. On the other hand, if you testosterone level is normal, a cream would not gives you any benefit, and would still leave you with unpleasant side affects.

11. Levitra, Cialis and Viagra. Levitra, Cialis, and Viagra can assist you in achieving and maintaining an erection during sexual activity via facilitating the blood flow to the penis. An advantage of Cialis if the relatively long effectiveness period (36 hours), but specialized medical advice is always needed to ascertain if any of such drugs could be useful for you. Furthermore, when evaluating the use of such drugs, remember that you run the risk of becoming psychological dependent to something which you don't really need.

12. Prostaglandin Injections. A shot of Prostaglandin in the penis can produce an immediate and lasting erection, even when Levitra, Cialis, and Viagra have failed to do so. I know, the idea of an penis injection is rather scary, but they really are quite painless, and your andrologist can teach you how to do them on your own.

Love your breasts as they are

2007-09-30T06:34:03Z

I have never met a woman who was entirely satisfied with her breasts.

"Too small!"
"They are way too big."
"The left one is much bigger than the right one, can’t you see?"

And I could never see. What I saw instead was an attractive woman comparing herself to an impossible standard of beauty.

Dove campaign-for-real-beauty get this message across very well: electronically touched-up images of models are presented as genuine, becoming ideals of a “beauty” which simply does not exist.

And if computer-wizards with their photoshop-magic weren’t doing enough, the spread of plastic surgery further distorts the idea of a normal body, so that the anti-gravity breasts you see on the cinema become your standard of how a beautiful bosom “ought to be.”

In short, you might suffer from a cognitive distortion, perceiving as quasi-normal the impossible breasts you see on TV, and as less than normal the nice breasts that Mother Nature has given you.

Have you ever thought of how much happier you could be if you were to fully accept your bosom as it is, and possibly all of your body too? Shame would be a think of the past, sex would be even more enjoyable, and the overall confidence boost you would get could help you achieving previously unthinkable results both in your personal and in your professional life.

If you don’t love your breasts yet, the first step is deciding if you really want to change this state of affair, or if you prefer to continue having mixed feelings about your own body.

I’ll give a few minutes to think about this one, in the meantime, I’ll get myself something to eat…

…
…
…

…and if you are still reading this post, I assume you have decided to fully accept your breasts as they are: congratulation! The first step is the most difficult one, and all of the others will be much easier for you. Just remember: if there’s a step which does not apply to your situation, simply skip it and move to the next one.

- Decide that you want to fully accept your breasts as they are.
Well, you have done this already, and I am writing it again simply because you might need to firm up this decision once or twice.

- Behave as if you already love your breasts.
For example, how would you dress if you were to fully accept your breasts as they are? Small steps are key here: you need to stretch your comfort zone just a little, without going all the way doing something which would makes you feel very uncomfortable, like wearing a see-through blouse without a bra.

- Hang out with people who like your breasts and tell you so. (in an appropriate manner)
If you have a boyfriend, what he feels and say about your body it’s important to the way you think about yourself: pay attention to what he says with regards to your breasts, both in private and in public, and check with your girlfriends to have an additional perspective.

If he doesn’t like your body at all, you might need to confront him, and maybe even consider finding a new partner.

If he does like you but he is not accustomed to pay compliments, go ahead and ask for them, explaining also which type of appreciation you are most in need of, and how it is best delivered. (eg.: yes to saying in private ‘I love to kiss your beautiful nipples’, no to something dirty and gross)

At this point you might wonder why on earth an intelligent man could ever need all of those instructions to do something as easy as paying a compliment. Well, that is one of the great mystery of life, ranking equally with “Who are we?” and “Where do we came from?”…

- Don’t gossip about other’s people body.
Avoid comparing your body with other women’s, and if you absolutely have to, always compare yourself with someone you consider less attractive than yourself.

- Pamper you breast with moisturizer.
Breasts have thinner skin than the rest of your body, so they are susceptible to dryness. Taking care of their hydration needs is yet another way to love them.

- Include your breasts in sexual play.
You might be doing it already, and if that is the case, your focus might be discovering new ways in which your bosom can give you pleasure. Be receptive to the way in which you prefer your breast to be stimulated and gently communicate it to your partner.

I would really appreciate it if you could write a short review of this post on StumbleUpon. You could also email it to a friend, Digg It, or add it to any other social bookmarking site you currently use

10 unusually fun ways of using a stress ball

2007-09-19T13:44:13Z

On a bad morning in your corporate job, few things can save the day like the often underestimated stress ball.

You see, those round buckets of energy have many functions besides simply being squeezed.

Back in the old days, I spent very happy times with my little stress ball, so the least I can do is to give it the credit it so richly deserve.

How can you brighten your day with a stress ball?

1. Throw it to an annoying colleague as a way to release your anger without giving him a chance to make a fuss about it: “Come on, it’s a stress ball, I was only kidding!”

2. Throw it very gently to a good looking colleague as a way to connect with her/his Inner Child: “Wanna Play?”

3. Exercise your muscles by squeezing it with unusual strength

4. Using three or four stress ball, you can start training as a Juggler: you never know when you might need an extra income…

5. Organize the office baseball championship using stress balls and empty bottle of waters

6. Time for the World Cup. Soccer with a stress ball is on of those extreme sports which you must experience at least once in a life time, but beware, you will get injured…

7. In need of some mental stimulation? Kick off a creative contest! The title? 10 unusually fun ways of using a stress ball!

8. The good old classic: find a basket and challenge a colleague on who is the best shooter

9. Your stress ball can help you preserving the temperature of tea and coffee. After you had a few sips of your favorite beverage, put the stress ball on top of your cup making sure it does not touch the liquid: now you can enjoy your hot drink for much longer!

10. I am missing number ten: please help! :)

You don’t have to be good looking to seduce a beautiful woman

2007-09-14T15:17:28Z

“Sure, you won’t be the only man tonight.”

Those were my wife's words, and I was thinking of them whilst having a drink with 7 beautiful women and praying that the night would turn all right.

Now my single man readers will be thinking that I should be blessing my lucky star for such an opportunity, but you see, I am a married man, and spending a great night with 7 fascinating, good looking and intelligent women, dangerous ideas might creep into my head if I don't constantly watch out for them!

The night starts as usual: drinks, and then more drinks. Little did I know that we were going to run into a seduction-training night, AKA a BootCamp, of Celebrity Pick-Up Artist Tyler Durden.

Suddenly a short Asian guy approaches our group and starts chatting to my wife: I am relaxed at first, since he is accompanied by a good looking Latin girl which I mistake for his girlfriend. I was later to discover that she was what pick up artists call a Pivot, a woman used to attract other women.

I stay put and I watch the situation evolving pretty quickly. The Asian guy moves along, and other unattractive men skillfully approach my group: chatting confidently, asking a girl to follow them where they could ‘talk’, and then either getting a phone number or making out in a surprisingly little time.

Within 10 minutes, I am left alone with my wife: where’s everyone? What’s going on in here?!

Yes, I’m a Tyler Durden, and this is a seduction-training night

If you have read the multi-million best-seller The Game you know who Tyler Durden is. If you haven’t read this great book, borrow it from a friend right away! It’s a wide opening expose’ of the of the pick up artists techniques, recently popularized with VH1’s series The Pick Up Artist.

The Game is not only a single man bible, but also a fascinating read for women: it shows ladies how an ugly man could approach them successfully, and it makes a clear statement of how very desperate men are for sex.

In The Game, Tyler is the archetypal bad guy who becomes a master pick up artist by copying other people ideas. Unattractive by common standards (sorry Tyler…) he develops a set of techniques which allows him to seduce women with ease.

I recognize him from a You Tube video of him I had recently seen and there and then I ask him an interview for Even Happier.

Meet the seduction master

Marco: ‘What’s your real name?’
Owen: ’Owen.’

Marco: ‘Is The Game really based on a true story.’
Owen: ‘Yes.’

Marco: ‘Owen, do you feel misrepresented by this book?’ [In The Game, Owen is The Bad Guy]
Owen: [with a sarcastic tone] ‘No, I am really an evil mastermind, I wanted to take over Project Hollywood [a pick up artist community], and I would have managed to if only The Game hadn’t stopped me!’

Marco: ‘Owen, let me interpret your answer. Every book needs a bad guy. I guess you are saying that The Game doesn’t do you justice.’
Owen: ‘Some would say so.’

Marco: ’Now tell me about your work: what’s Real Social Dynamics all about?’ Owen: ’ We move people from a scarcity mindset to an abundance reality. We also run Bootcamps like this one all over the western world. ’

Marco: ’Looks like a cool job! But what is true happiness for Owen?’
Owen: ’In life, I find happiness in the doing. It’s like picking up girls: if you don’t enjoy the process you have no chance of being successful. Enjoy what you are doing, the hell with the results. ‘

Marco: ’Owen, I owe it to my readers to ask your expert advice on how to approach women: could you give us you top three tips?’
Owen: ’Be positive: if you approach a woman with a sad face chances are that she’ll reject you. Be talkative: as you might imagine, if no one is doing the talking your pick up is not heading for success. Offer value: what are you going to tell her once you are there? Unless you have something interesting to say, her attention will quickly drift to someone else.’

Marco: ’Thanks Owen, it was great chatting with you.’
Owen: ’Anytime!’

The interview is over: I suddenly realize that I left my wife alone in a club full of pick up artists. I run back to look for her. Fortunately she’s there where I left her, and she is still alone: Phiuuuu!

I have the terrible idea of telling her who I have just met, and it turns out she wants to meet Tyler too. Nooo! So we look for Tyler in the club. ‘Hopefully he’s already gone’, I mumble within myself.

Unfortunately Owen/Tyler is still there. He beams us with a charming smile. Introductions are made, and he immediately works his magic with my wife whilst I am there watching. I am about to do something about it, but he manages to confuse me with a compliment, saying very loudly to my wife: “Gosh, what a sexy man you have married.”

The situation quickly worsens: my wife says to Tyler that she had noticed him as soon as he entered the club. She is flirting with him now! Tyler moves for the killing, and says that she must have been attracted to his hairy chest.

Attracted to what?

Thanks God. He blew it. My wife’s passing interest is gone for good.

Time to go home. I make a mental note to Self never to introduce my wife to a celebrity pick up artist, and I realize that Tyler must have intentionally broken the connection he had just created with her.

Thanks Tyler, we should definitely hang out again, next time I will not bring my wife though.

Letter to my daughter: on being yourself

2007-09-07T06:40:00Z

Dear Sally,
You must learn that you cannot be loved by all people.

You can be the finest apple in the world – ripe, juicy, sweet, and succulent – and offer yourself to all,
but there will be people who do not like apples.

If you are the world’s finest apple, and someone you love does not like apples, you still have the choice of becoming a banana, but be warned: if you choose to become a banana, you will be a second rate banana.

You must also realize that if you choose to be a second rate banana, there will be people who do not like bananas, so you can spend your life trying to be the best banana – which is impossible if you are an apple –
or you can seek again to be the finest apple.

Hugs, Daddy.

Author unknown, adapted from Adrienne Lee’s psychotherapy seminar.

10 tips to make her want you again

2007-08-31T06:44:03Z

He loves her. She loves him. Initially they were all over each other, but now things have changed.

Is loss of sexual appetite normal?

Absolutely: it might happen to both partners, but in women is more common.

I have personally experienced this problem and I know how helpless a man can feel in the face of a partner constantly rejecting his sexual approaches. As a counselor, I have also helped clients to overcome this challenge: the good news is that you can make things work.

The first step is to get a sense of what might be happening: why does a woman stop wanting her man?

Physical reasons
- Hormonal fluctuations: the first thing to check with blood analysis.
- Tiredness and lack of sleep.
- Medical conditions such as endometriosis, fibroids and many others: check with your doctor.

Psychological reasons
- Relationship issue: there might be things you need to work out.
- Depression: it has a devastating effect on sexual desire.
- Stress: relocating, getting married, new job, or simply too much work.
- Sublimation: Women are more capable than men of using their raw sexual energy to fuel their every day tasks and passions: they could become so immersed in what they love doing, that the energy previously available for sex becomes now dedicated to a new passion only.

So after discovering that her loss of desire is not due to a sudden fall of your sexual skills, what can you do, as a man, to make her want you again?

1- Make space in your day. In our fast-paced life, sex might become just another item on a busy diary: ‘I have got half an hour on Sunday so we can fit a quickie there.’ How much time do you spend with you partner free of chores and interruptions? Create daily or at least weekly occasions in which you can simply stay together.
2- Reconnect non-sexually. Create opportunities to feel a special sense of connection with you partner. It might be a romantic dinner, a walk in the park, or any other activity you both like. It must be very clear that such pleasant activity is not some kind of extended foreplay which will see you trying to approach her sexually in the end…
3- Create sensual occasions in which full sex is forbidden. There is much more to sex than penetration. Discovering other ways to enjoy each other is fun and it also reduces everyone’s performance anxiety.
4- Discover you conditions for great sex. The fantasy model of sex dictates that we should be able to function and presumably enjoy sex without any special requirements. The reality is that we all have conditions which need to be met in order to have good sex. For example, you probably need to be rested, maybe you prefer to have the light off, and possibly immediately after dinner you are not in the mood. Give it a good thought, find out your very own conditions for great sex, and then discuss the topic with your partner.
5- Encourage her selfishness. An excessive focus on pleasing others might inhibit sexual pleasure first and sexual desire later. An orgasm is all about a woman being attentive to her own needs: encourage her selfishness in bed.
6- Buy a lubricant. A woman might experience vaginal dryness even if she is interested in sex. So go to a good sex shop and buy a good lubricant, but remember: she is the only one able to decide if it’s ok to use it or not. In fact, she has also the right to simply throw it in the bin. After all, it’s her body we are talking about.
7- Stop using a lubricant. On the other hand, maybe she isn’t wet because she does not feel like having sex: if that is the case, using a lubricant might be a recipe for disaster. If you have been using a lubricant for some time, stop it for a while and see what happens.
8- Change the scenery. Routine is a libido killer, avoid it at all cost.
9- Ask her what she likes. Do you know what your woman enjoys in bed? Make sure you do, down to tiny details such as the preferred way of licking. Does she know what you like? Go ahead and tell her: your pleasure might feed her lust.
10- What can you change in yourself? Tough questions time: have an open discussion with your partner and prepare yourself to hearing a few unpleasant truth. No, it’s not about your penis size - that's perfectly ok - but it might be about your hygiene habits…

The 13 weirdest turn-ons ever

2007-08-25T10:55:55Z

Maybe you sometimes worry about your sexual habits:

"Am I normal or what?"

If that is the case, I have got good news for you: between consenting adults all goes, and here I have a list of some truly weird sexual tastes…

• Ailurophilia: sexual attraction to cats

• Acrotomophilia: love of amputation or amputees

• Autonephioplia: sexual arousal from diapers

• Phalloorchoalgolagnia: sexual arousal from receiving a painful blow in the male genitals

• Coprophilia: sexual attraction to feces

• Formicophilia: sexual attraction to insects crawling on parts of the body

• Emetophilia : sexual attraction to vomit

• Toonophilia: sexual attraction to cartoons or anime characters

• Eproctophilia: sexual attraction to flatulence

• Stygiophilia: sexual pleasure from the thought of going to hell

• Transformation fetish: sexual arousal from depictions of transformations of people into objects

• Urolagnia: sexual attraction to urine

• Xylophilia: sexual attraction to wood

If you are turned on by something unusual, don't worry about society's 'standards': if you and your partner feel good thinking about sex before you do it, during the intercourse, and remembering what you have done after the fact, then you really must be doing it right!

In short, if your partner agrees and no one gets hurt don't give it a second thought: switch off the PC and get it on!

Say no and stay friends - with Becky

2007-08-17T16:49:43Z

"A real friend helps you in time of need. Maybe, but there are times in which you need to say no: you could be super busy, or the favour being asked might be far too dodgy..."

For a change, I have written the rest of this post on Leo’s ZenHabit: it’s a great blog, check it out, if you haven’t done it already!

And if friends come in time of need, shall I consider Becky a friend? You might be wondering: who is this Becky anyway? Well, a week ago I received this very flattering letter:

Dear Marco,

I wanted to drop you a note to let you know how much I enjoy your website. I was stumbling about the Internet late this evening and was shocked to find a site that made me smile and feel a bit more comfortable about my place in this world.

Thank you for the time and energy you put into brightening others' lives via the website. I will be checking for updates :). Now... if only I could find a counselor with the same positive attitude!

Take care and blessings to you and your family,
Becky

In a different moment, I would have simply replied via email thanking Becky for her lovely note, but her letter came at an important time for me, one in which I was asking myself if EvenHappier was just another Internet-powered way to spend a few minutes of our precious time, or if it could actually touch a few readers life. So my Thank You goes to Becky, and to all of the other nice people who send me fun or encouraging comments via email or in the blog: you might not know it, but you really make all the difference.

Becky also mentions her interest in counseling. Well, I am a counselor too! Take a look at the Telephone Counseling section in case you are interested, and let me know what you think.

Last but not least, Becky says that she has found my site via StumbleUpon. I think most of you know this great site: it a unique way to discover new content on the Internet, and I owe them big time... more than 14.000 visitors have found EvenHappier thanks to SU: I think it would be only me writing and my mum reading if it wasn’t for StumbleUpon!

BTW, mum are you really reading this? Well...

Back to StumbleUpon. In particular the post Fun Makes Change Easy has gone viral. And how many visitors have come from Digg for the same post? Zero, nil, asolutely no one!

Digg users hates me or what?

So I got curious, and I began checking StumbleUpon top health sites, to see if they actually got anyone Digging them... The result? Popular digg health sites are often unknown on SU and viceversa! Digg users are mostly male techies interested in creepy news , whilst Stumblers are more inclined toward timeless advice.

I guess that as the great American writer Willa Cather once said: “One cannot divine nor forecast [and neither Digg!] the conditions that will make happiness; one only stumbles upon them…”