The Evening Bulletin with Perry Michael Simon

Want, Need, And Other People

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 08 May 2020 16:00:00 GMT

I'm feeling guilty about ordering "non-essential" stuff for delivery during a pandemic. I'm feeling guilty about ordering ANYTHING for delivery during a pandemic.

Adult Education

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 06 May 2020 16:00:00 GMT

Are you using your pandemic down-time in a constructive manner? Yeah, me neither.

What I Miss

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 04 May 2020 16:00:00 GMT

A lot has changed since March. I'm not certain we'll get back what we had in the meantime, and I'm not talking about the economy.

Heads Up

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 01 May 2020 16:00:00 GMT

Guess who's back? (Sort of. Kinda.) The Bulletin lives....

Taking a Break

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 19 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

The podcast goes on hiatus after 666 episodes (this is the 667th), because everyone needs a break.

Your Lying Eyes

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 18 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

A poll shows more people today think the coronavirus threat is "blown out of proportion" than thought so a month ago. We are truly in a post-facts world. (Source: NPR/PBS NewsHour/Marist Poll)

Please Don't Squeeze

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 17 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

Toilet paper isn't really in short supply. It's just that... okay, we'll go into why you can't easily find TP at your local market, and how that's by design.

Single-Minded

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 16 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

Things take a dark turn, and Mr. Brightside has some trouble finding humor in anything. I talk about how the incessant coronavirus news is affecting what I do for a living.

Order To Go

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 13 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

We live in a time when we need instructions on safety when eating out. That's distressing. (Source: USA Today)

Events Overtake Everything

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 12 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

What happens when there are too many massive news stories happening all at once? This. This is what happens.

Blockbuster Lives

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 11 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

VHS tapes are making a comeback? Not really, but for some people, videotape remains a big deal, like vinyl records. (Source: CNBC via NBC News)

Bump This

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 10 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

Elbow bumps replacing fist bumps replacing handshakes...

Time Is Not On Our Side

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 09 Mar 2020 16:00:00 GMT

We love technology until it just won't do what it's supposed to do, like automatically reset clocks for Daylight Saving Time. That's when the cursing starts.

The B.O. Railroad

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 06 Mar 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Monopoly takes too long to play. It's complicated and boring. Why, then, is it so popular? (Source: BBC)

Close Quarters

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 05 Mar 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Could you live with your toilet right next to your bed, in the same room? In London, people pay big bucks for that, not because they want to, but because that's what's available. The real estate market is insane. (Source: CNN)

Hunkering Down

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 04 Mar 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Coronavirus has some people turning survivalist, hoarding supplies in case we're all quarantined. Are you ready to go that far? (Source: KTVT/Dallas-Fort Worth)

Raise A Glass Of Two-Buck Chuck

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 03 Mar 2020 17:00:00 GMT

The passing of the founder of Trader Joe's serves as a reminder that not too many other businesses are as universally highly regarded. Except for the parking. (Source: Washington Post)

No Contact, Please

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 02 Mar 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Coronavirus threatens the way we greet each other. Can you live without handshakes or European-style cheek kisses? Yes, you can. (Source: Los Angeles Times)

Seasonal Flavor Disorder

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 28 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

It's that season again. Peeps are back. Shamrock shakes, too. Spare me. (Source: USA Today; CNN)

Stop The Presses

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 27 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

The pending demise of a Spanish-language newsstand in L.A. is a reminder of how far print has fallen. It also raises the question of whether anyone's reading anything but social media posts and text messages anymore. (Source: Los Angeles Times)

Don't Blame The Sour Patch Kids

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 26 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Parents still think that kids get "sugar highs" that cause them to bounce off walls. It's not true, but that doesn't prevent the myth from persisting. (Source: New York Times)

Coffee, Tea, Or Penicillin?

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 25 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Coronavirus isn't the only health-related danger flight attendants have to face these days. They're always dealing with illness and bacteria. It's your fault. (Source: Los Angeles Times)

Pack 'n Pay

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 24 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Two airlines have increased their baggage fees. It's not because their costs are higher; it's because they can. (Source: USA Today)

Gut Instinct

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 21 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Yet another study shows that the Mediterranean diet is very good for you. And yet again, you won't take the hint. (Source: CNN)

Compost Mortem

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 20 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Burial and cremation have new competition. You can now be composted. You'll probably want to wait until after you're dead, though. (Source: BBC)

A Little Down Time

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 19 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

You listen to music or podcasts while working out. Perhaps you should reconsider that. (Source: The Atlantic)

Not A Drop To Drink

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 18 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

A new health fad turns out to be a very bad idea. It could cause you to develop long-term and even fatal damage. That's what you get for taking health advice from Instagram. (Source: Los Angeles Times)

Dog Germs

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 17 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

No, pets aren't gonna catch coronavirus. Stop putting masks on them. (Source: CTV)

Love, Exciting And New

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 14 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

It's Valentine's Day, so let's keep it quick. You won't want to delay candy and dinner.

Excess Recess

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 13 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

The trend towards allowing workers to take breaks during the day sometimes leads to too much time spent on surfing the web and Facebook and other pursuits. It's called "cyberloafing," and maybe there's a limit. Or maybe not. (Source: BBC)

Rand McNally Rally

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 12 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Some people prefer paper maps to GPS or map apps. The old-fashioned way may offer some benefits that Waze can't match. (Source: USA Today)

Grounded for Life

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 11 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Could flight shaming take hold in America like it's doing in Europe? Maybe, but it will have to get over some major hurdles to do so. (Source: Los Angeles Times)

The Big Number 639

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 10 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Every number's a milestone if you want it to be a milestone. You don't have to wait for a round number to celebrate, do you?

Let's Change the Subject

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 07 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Polls show that most people think you shouldn't discuss politics at the office. Most people do it anyway. (Source: USA Today)

Hold Your Breath Until You Land

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 06 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Are you more likely to catch coronavirus on an airplane? Probably not. At least, it's no more likely than if you're in any other place with lots of people. Maybe. (Source: Washington Post)

Hang Up

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 05 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Quentin Tarantino apparently doesn't have a cell phone. He bans other people's phones from the set, too. Maybe he's on to something. (Source: The Hollywood Reporter)

Sounds Good

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 04 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

You're watching a movie. The actors' accents sound inauthentic. Does that take you out of the moment? (Source: BBC)

Time Out

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 03 Feb 2020 17:00:00 GMT

More states and cities are on board with the idea of mental health days off for students. Perhaps they should consider extending that to the rest of us. (Source: Washington Post)

Stupor Bowl

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 31 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

A survey suggests that there will be a lot of Americans calling in sick the day after the Super Bowl. If you can't get it together after watching football on TV, maybe you should reassess your existence. (Source: USA Today)

Food Flight

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 30 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

The Washington Post offers some etiquette tips on eating while flying, and so do I. (Source: Washington Post)

Speak No Evil

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 29 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

A homeowners' association in Arizona wants to fine and punish residents for complaining about them on social media. That's not how it's supposed to work. (Source: Arizona Republic)

Everyone Vs. Food

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 28 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Two proposals are on the table for changes to nutrition labels. There are good and bad aspects to each of them. (Sources: The Guardian; Washington Post)

Too Soon

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 27 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Sometimes, you can prepare in advance. Sometimes, you can't. That's especially true with podcasts, and social media, when tragedy strikes.

Distinguished And Anxious

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 24 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Science has determined why some people's hair turns grey quicker. You can already guess the answer, and you'd be correct. (Source: The Guardian)

A Nod and a Wink

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 23 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

How are you at shaking hands? One article offers tips on how to do it right. I wonder why we do it at all. (Source: BBC)

Hot Dog On A Stick At Tiffany's

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 22 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

The shopping mall may be dead, but some malls are thriving. They have certain things in common. (Source: New York Times)

Everything Is Awesome

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 21 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Having conquered the children's market, Lego is now going after the adult market. We are all reverting to childhood. There's something to be said for that. (Source: Washington Post)

The Gist Of It

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 20 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

It's easy to just react to headlines you see on Facebook and Twitter without looking deeper. That's a mistake.

Better To Look Good

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 17 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Some survey claims that most Americans worry about being judged for what they wear while exercising. I don't share that concern. (Source: SWNS via New York Post)

You've Tried The Rest, Now Try The Best

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 16 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Kiwi on a pizza? That's what someone is doing in Denmark. I'd be less appalled if it didn't include ham, too. (Source: New York Post)

Welcome to the Rest Of Your Life

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 15 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Herein, a few words for those affected by the radio layoffs... er, "employee dislocation." Even if you don't want to hear anything from anybody right now, maybe this'll help a little.

The View From Steerage

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 14 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

An article in the Washington Post examined what the worst seats are on an airplane, and how to avoid them. I didn't think you need an article for that. (Source: Washington Post)

National Obvious Month

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 13 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

January is National Walk Your Dog Month. I suppose you wouldn't think of walking your dog without an officially designated month in which to do so. (Source: WTVJ/Miami)

You Have The Time

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 10 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

A study says you use five hours of your day on "leisure activities," which means mostly looking at screens. That means you DO have time to exercise. You just aren't. (Source: New York Times)

Gesundheit Again

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 09 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

It's a bad flu season already. I hope you haven't gotten it so far. (Source: KYW-TV/Philadelphia)

No More Rope Climbing

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 08 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Some schools are replacing mandatory gym class with mandatory virtual physical education, which has students wearing Fitbits to track after-school activity. What a good idea. (Source: AP via Boston.com)

This Is 2020

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 07 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

The new year comes with a warning involving check writing, which reminds us all that some people still write checks.

The Waiting Game

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 06 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

How early do you get to the airport for a flight? We know the official stance, but different people have different tolerances for long airport hangouts.

Monster Truck Fiesta

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 03 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

It is not your imagination. SUVs ARE getting bigger and longer. Say, does Dr. Freud have any appointments available? (Source: USA Today)

Look Up

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 02 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

Cellphone-related injuries have increased, but you knew that. Maybe you should pay attention, too. (Source: KABC-TV/Los Angeles)

Knowing When To Shut Up

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 01 Jan 2020 17:00:00 GMT

A newspaper asked CEOs about their companies' rules for employees' social media posts. Nothing they said will surprise you. (Source: Miami Herald)

Exit, Pursued By A Bear

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 31 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

The year's over. It doesn't matter.

A Long Way Down

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 30 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Someone fell off a 200-foot cliff around here to the ocean and rocks below and survived. This happens more than you'd expect. The falling part, that is. The survival isn't typical. Nor is the national news coverage. (Source: CNN)

Rudie Can't Fail

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 27 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

A survey finds the rudest city in America. It won't shock you. It also won't matter. (Source: Business Insider)

It Ain't Over

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 26 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Yeah, I know, the decade doesn't technically end next week. We go through this every ten years. (Source: CNN)

Pop-O-Matic FTW

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 25 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Did you get any board games for the holidays? They haven't gone away, and they're still popular, it says here. I'll have to trust them on this one. (Source: WCBS-TV/New York)

The Hallmark Lie

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 24 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Cosmopolitan came up with a term for a dating situation peculiar to the holidays: "snow-globing." Is this a thing? (Source: Cosmopolitan)

Off Week

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 23 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

A Wednesday holiday presents a dilemma: Which days should everyone get to take off? I have a suggestion.

A Little Too Jolly Around The Midsection

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 20 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Are you in the midst of gaining weight during the holidays? Everyone does, it seems. It might be a little too late for this year, but there are things you can do to avoid the Christmas spread. (Source: Los Angeles Times)

Big Enough For The Both Of Us

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 19 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Bicyclists complain that car drivers are trying to run them off the road. Car drivers complain that bikers get in the way of traffic. They may both be right. (Source: WKMG-TV/Orlando)

Cleanup In Aisles 1 Through 9

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 18 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

An unusual customer is frequenting a particular supermarket salad bar. It will, or at least should, make you not want to eat at salad bars. (Source: WCCO-TV/Minneapolis)

Polly Doesn't Want A Cracker Anymore

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 17 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Nighty Night

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 16 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

How much sleep do you get every night? If your answer's "not enough," you should be aware of the alternative, which is equally troubling. (Source: CTV News)

What's Not In Your Wallet?

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 13 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

The cashless society is practically here, with most people using debit and credit cards and other forms of payment for everything. Some studies say that's not necessarily a good thing. (Source: BBC)

The Lost Art Of Chicken Scratch

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 12 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Every year, another state legislature considers a bill to require the teaching of cursive handwriting in public schools. And every year, we talk about it, because of course we do. (Source: CNN)

The Thought Doesn't Count

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 11 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Money stresses people out in general, but a survey indicates it's especially stressful at holiday time. You're dreading the gift-giving, aren't you? (Source: LendingTree.com)

Like A Regular Work Day With An Open Bar

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 10 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

A survey says that office holiday parties are making a comeback. I didn't know they went away. (Source: Scripps National via KNXV-TV/Phoenix)

Tastes Great. Less Popular

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 09 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Beer sales continue to slip. People are still drinking, but they're drinking other things. (Source: CNN)

I Can't Believe It's Not Meat

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 06 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Plant-based meat is a big seller right now. Meat producers want you to think twice about eating the non-meat. There's a lot of money at steak... er, stake. (Source: New York Times)

A Rose By Any Other Name

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 05 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

The last month of the year means it's time for those Most Popular Baby Name lists. Use them at your kid's own risk. (Source: Cox Media Group via WFOX-TV-WTEV-TV/Jacksonville)

Blessed Relief

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 04 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Aruba has an offer for those of you who need a break from election stress. I think that means it's an offer for everyone. (Source: WTXF-TV/Philadelphia)

Fir Love Or Money

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 03 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Christmas tree prices are up, and they're blaming Millennials, because they blame Millennials for everything these days. (Source: KGTV/San Diego)

The Resemblance Is Remarkable

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 02 Dec 2019 17:00:00 GMT

People are getting into a trend that we thought died out 30 years ago, with parents and kids (and pets) wearing matching clothes. I'm gonna go ahead and blame Instagram. (Source: BBC)

Black Friday, Still A Thing

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 29 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Black Friday isn't what it used to be, but it's still a thing, and you'll still indulge, even though you know it's usually not worth the trouble.

Après Turkey, le Déluge

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 28 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

You cook. You eat. And then, someone's gotta do the cleaning up. Who's it gonna be in your house?

Getaway Day

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 27 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

If you're stuck in traffic today trying to get wherever it is you're going for Thanksgiving, well, don't say you weren't warned.

Ready to Grumble

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 26 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

What's Thanksgiving without political arguments? Normal, according to surveys. (Source: Philadelphia Inquirer)

Loosen Your Belt

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 25 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Why do we eat more on Thanksgiving? Science has some answers, beyond the obvious. (Source: WTTV/Indianapolis)

Food Flight

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 22 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

What Thanksgiving food can you bring onto an airplane in your carry-on? We're here to help. (Source: Washington Post)

OK Colleague

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 21 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

There's a real world application of the #OKBoomer meme. It's at work, and it can become divisive. (Source: NPR)

Suits You, Sir

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 20 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Do offices even have dress codes anymore? Business casual seems to dominate the workplace, but some folks are even more casual than that. Me, for example. (Source: Workforce.com)

Upright and Locked

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 19 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

How do you deal with annoying airline passengers on your flight? There aren't a lot of options. (Source: Washington Post)

The Express Lane

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 18 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

A startup is planning to offer Southern California commuters the ability to fly over traffic for a monthly fee. I still think telecommuting makes more sense. (Source: KGTV/San Diego)

The Little Red Book

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 15 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Zagat Guides are back in print! Okay, just New York's and just for now, but they're back. Is there a demand for that in an online age? (Source: New York Times)

Push the Button, Frank

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 14 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

The theft of camera equipment from a guy's car illustrates how technology has made that easier. That wasn't supposed to be how it went. (Source: KCBS-TV/Los Angeles)

Don't Rush Me

Perry Michael Simon — Wed, 13 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

A newspaper ran a lovely obituary for someone who turned out to be very much alive. Not everybody gets to read his own obituary. (Source: The Guardian)

A Little Night Music

Perry Michael Simon — Tue, 12 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Let's talk about the lawsuit someone filed against Madonna for starting her concerts late. Is it an understandable complaint or a get-off-my-lawn moment, or both? (Source: TMZ)

Rocky Horror

Perry Michael Simon — Mon, 11 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Here, we have a couple of stories about rocks in the news, one about the kind you'd wear on your finger and the other getting in the way of traffic. There's also some Millennials-killing-everything talk, if that's the kind of stuff that you enjoy. (Sources: CNBC, CNN)

Toys B We

Perry Michael Simon — Fri, 08 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

There are some new additions to the Toy Hall of Fame. Naturally, I have opinions.

Gotta Be The Shoes

Perry Michael Simon — Thu, 07 Nov 2019 17:00:00 GMT

Someone tested expensive Nike, Adidas, and Under Armour sneakers and found that price and quality are not always related. We knew that. We also knew that it's not about quality. (Source: CBC)