What God did for Others, He’ll do for You!

As a Christian life can really get discouraging especially since we know all things are possible for those who love the Lord. But it seems no matter what we try, we’re stuck. When you’re up against what seems like an unattainable situation (“impossible opportunity”) that’s when we need to be encouraged with the 7700 promises in God’s Word. When we do our part, He’ll do His.

1-       185,000 crack Assyrian troops surrounded Jerusalem ready to attack. Hezekiah had everyone pray and fast. The next morning they awakened only to find ALL the Assyrian troops DEAD – Isaiah 36-37.

2-       The ship Paul was prisoner aboard was breaking up with everyone about to die. God delivered them ALL from certain death – Acts 27.

3-       Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-Nego were thrown into a super-heated fiery furnace, but they walked out not even smelling like smoke – Daniel 3.

4-       When faced with attack by 3 different armies, King Jehoshaphat and Judah prayed and praised God. The result was the 3 armies destroyed each other – 2 Chronicles 20.

5-       Moses and the families of Jacob (Israel) were being chased by the Egypt’s crack army. God parted the Red Sea, allowing the Israelites to escape, but drowning the pursuing army – Exodus 12-14.

6-       When Haman plotted to kill all the Israelites while they were slaves, God saved them with Esther, one (1) simple orphaned girl – Book of Esther.

Now: “That’s my God! What He did for them, He’ll do for me!”

7-       After saving the lives of the wise men, Daniel was plotted against and got thrown in the Lion’s Den, but God shut the their mouths and he went unharmed – Daniel 2, 6.

8-       A highly venomous snake bit Paul while on Malta. But he suffered no harm – Acts 28.

9-       After all his victories, King David was pursued by his friends and Absalom, his own son’s army. God delivered him and returned everything to him – 2 Samuel 15-24.

Say: “That’s my God! What He did for him, He’ll do for me!”

Remember: If you’re about God’s business, He’ll be about your business. Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He SHALL direct your paths. – Proverbs 3: 5-6

Here’s an example from current life:

At a recent soccer practice, a big boy approached our 5-year-old grandson and took his ball away. He said, “I have your ball and I’m bigger than you, so what are you going to do about that?”  Our grandson declared, “I’m not afraid of YOU, because I have God on the INSIDE of me and he’s bigger than ANYBODY. So what are you going to do about that?” The kid just gave him his ball back. (What he was effective because he really KNEW the GREATER ONE lives on the inside of Him. So He wasn’t afraid!)

So, what are you speaking out of your mouth? Remember, Death and Life are in the power of the tongue. – Proverbs 18:21. We need to have the faith of a child. Don’t gaze at your problem and glance at God. Instead, glance at the problem and gaze at your God. The reality will hit you – God IS bigger!

So as you go through your daily life facing seemingly impossible opportunities, seek God; speak the Word over your problem; watch your words; and acknowledge the power of God in your life by saying, “That’s MY God! What He did for others, He’ll do for me!”

Related posts:

1. Quick Guide to the Bible
2. Encouragement!
3. Advice & Tips for Ladies before Dating

What Every Female Should Know Parents Often Forget To Explain!

Have any of these ever happened to you?

-          A guy you’re attracted to turns out to be discourteous and a real jerk?

-          You felt sorry for a sad guy, trying to help him, so he asks you out for a date?

-          A guy tells you he really likes you, but treats you badly around his friends?

-          You go for months without a guy being interested in you?

This article is a comprehensive guide having over 60 helpful hints allowing you to better understand how guys think and what motivates them!

As you read, please understand this is written out of sincere love for ladies. We’ve both made many mistakes in our lives, so want to help you avoid the deep hurts and/or scars they caused.

(This info was gathered by surveying guys and observation of ladies of all ages. It was written to help augment parental guidance, protect you from dangers in today’s society and help you better understand the character of guys, so you’ll be more attractive in ways besides just the physical.)

Because this is a long thesis, we’ve divided it into the following sections:

I.          Self Esteem #1-2

II.          Your Presentation #3-39

A. Hygiene 4-28

- Skin Care  #4-9

- Hair & Nails #10-21

- Breath, Teeth & Odors  #22- 28

B. Posture  #29

C. Clothing  #30-33

D. Manners  #34-39

III.         Turn-ons and Turn-offs   #40-47

IV.        Understanding Guys #48-55

V.         Dating   #56-59

VI.        The Prime Motive of Guys

VII.       Common Sense Benefits to Waiting ‘til Marriage #60-65

VIII.       Conclusion

1- So here goes. But first – here’s a word of CAUTION when you’re trying to impress that really cute guy.

Be careful about what you want!

You may get what you want, but . . .

You may not want – what you get!

I.     SELF-ESTEEM

2- Before we proceed, you need to know You Are Special! God said “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” God created you as a totally unique person. God called your name at the foundation of the earth. You are the apple of His eye. He has a plan just for you! He even sent His Son to die for you, so you could live a happy and successful life.

God said in Jeremiah 29:11-13 For I know the (thoughts and) plans I have for you says the Lord. (Thoughts and) Plans of peace and not of evil to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I WILL listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with ALL your heart. Later Jesus said: I have come that you may have life MORE abundantly. So smile. God’s in your corner!

II.   YOUR DAILY PRESENTATION

3- First impressions are lasting! It’s important to get ready at home, so you can take the time needed to look your best, instead of throwing yourself together in the car, at school or in the workplace. Being well groomed includes showering, skin preparation, makeup, groomed hair/nails as well as clothes free of lint, dander and animal/human hair.

A. HYGIENE

Skin Care

4- I have talked to many females who think: Some people feel “either you’re born with nice skin or you’re not!” I couldn’t disagree more!

Pimples/blemishes result from an infection under the skin, caused by clogged pores. (Believe it or not, it takes about 3 months for blemishes to come to the surface. Just covering blemishes with a heavier coat of foundation just adds to the problem.) So, it’s important to keep your skin clean and exfoliated. Cleansing the skin twice a day and exfoliating at least twice a week (depending upon your scrub) will greatly help.

Obviously, scrubs and skin care products can be purchased from your local cosmetic department store cosmetic counter, drug store or discount store. For more problems like severe acne see a dermatologist and/or esthetician.

5- Your face is really important, but needs to be ready BEFORE going out in public. Some ladies embarrass themselves by applying makeup and “touch ups” in very public places. (Guys routinely make fun of ladies doing their eyes and lips while driving.) It is suggested this be done in private.

Here’s a real example: A classroom had a mirror above a sink. Upon entering the classroom, numerous girls went to it to check their make up and hair. One cute girl took the opportunity to squeeze her pimples. She didn’t realize the entire class was watching and disgusted!

Here’s a principle you can count on: Guys are easily (AND enjoy being completely) fooled! Yes, Hollywood stars use heavy make-up, so they will look great on stage. But, camera tricks are employed so no one sees. However, your friends have you under very close scrutiny. The best makeup is that which no one ever notices.

6- Make certain to blend your foundation so there isn’t a line, especially when applying a different color than your natural skin tone. Guys make fun of ladies with “make-up” lines. Frankly, it looks sloppy.

7- Consider carefully before applying heavy eye makeup. Yes, SUBTLE tricks can be used to make your eyes appear larger and more beautiful. However, heavy eye makeup makes you look like you were poked in the eye! Guys sometimes cruelly call it “clown makeup.”  Eye makeup like it worn by “Amy Winehouse” may be appropriate for stage, but up close, they’re odd!

8- Falsely drawn lipstick is risky.  While your lips appear larger, guys have said “her lips were covered with leftover soup from lunch.” People won’t be able to take their eyes off your mouth – and not in a good way, either.

9- Actually, Guys don’t care how you got so beautiful! My husband says, “We’re just happy you look terrific!” What do they say is a major turn-off? Seeing females apply their “war paint!” Remember:

- Guys don’t want to see your make up!

- Guys don’t want it to rub off on their clothes.

- Guys don’t like the smell of it!

- Guys don’t want to know about it.

- Guys don’t want to see it on your telephone! and

- Guys don’t want to discuss it.

“We are easily (AND enjoy being completely) fooled! The best makeup is makeup we never notice.”

The point is: Look your best before leaving home. Any make-up you carry should just be for private touch-ups! Remember: With Makeup – Less is More!

Breath, Teeth & Odors  - Cleanliness

10- SMILE! Everyone is better looking when they smile! Some hide their smile because they are embarrassed by braces, but no one else sees it that way. A smile even with braces is very attractive.

11- Guard your breath to keep it fresh. Once I met an extremely beautiful 24-year-old girl who had a wonderful bubbly personality. She confided in me that she very seldom ever had a date. It became obvious to me the problem: Every time we talked, her breath was terribly offensive. This is an immediate turn-off and disqualifier.

12- Brush your teeth at least twice a day. (Advanced Hint: Peroxide on the toothbrush before putting on toothpaste, helps kill bacteria that cause bad breath while whitening your teeth. Don’t forget to brush your tongue. Its rough surface stores odor-causing bacteria.)

13- Keep your teeth free of “plaque.” This is caused by residue after eating. Consistent brushing and flossing along with regular dental visits help keep your teeth free of it. Plaque causes tooth decay increasing bad breath.

14-  Keep mints or gum handy. (A sweetener like Xylitol is all natural and helps prevents cavities. Regular sugar leaves a bad aftertaste and makes your breath worse.

15- Avoid foods that cause bad breath like onions and garlic especially before a date. Even toothpaste and mouthwash cannot adequately cover up these odors. (Pizza, Tacos, Hamburgers and foods with onions and/or garlic should be avoided before a date. Some mouthwash has a component of alcohol. This can give the impression to teachers and parents that you are a heavy drinker. Once, before my sister’s wedding, I rinsed out my mouth with mouthwash. My Dad accused me of being a drunk.

(Peroxide is very inexpensive and a terrific mouthwash. It not only freshens your breath, but kills bacteria. I know this sounds extreme, but if you can leave a capful in your mouth for 2 minutes, it will make your mouth feel really clean while whitening your teeth.)

16- Smoking causes bad breath. Frankly, in combination with coffee, it is nauseating. (A high school teacher introduced me to this wretched odor which I’ll never forget.)

17- Many scents are unpleasant beside body odor (B.O.). Ladies don’t like the smell of old sweat in a men’s locker room or guy’s feet. Similarly, guys find the smells of a beauty parlor and make-up, just as revolting!

18- Clothes may look clean, BUT can carry unflattering odors. Certain ethnic foods though delicious, have very pungent odors that absorb into clothes. These may be very disagreeable to some. If clothes smell bad, they’re not presentable!

Example – In an early morning class, a very pretty student raised her hand asking for help. When my husband got next to her, the smell of ethic food in her clothes was overwhelming and nauseating. (This would drive most young men away!) He couldn’t wait to move out of scent range.

Second Example: I’ll never forget, my boss saying to me: “How was lunch at Boosters?” I was amazed! “How did you know? I asked. He said, “The grease smell followed you into my office.” (Note: I stopped eating at Boosters.)

Third Example – Our son and daughter worked at family restaurants. Every night when they got home or got picked up, they smelled like cigarettes, coffee and grease. They couldn’t smell it, but we about fell over. So wash (or clean) your clothes frequently. No amount of perfume will cover these odors!

19- Remove stubble and hair from legs and armpits. It may be acceptable in European countries, but to most in the U.S. it’s unappealing! American guys associate this with uncleanliness. This may not be rational, but its how they feel.

20- Don’t borrow or share personal items such as shoes, deodorant, lipstick and mascara. My suggestion is “never do it!” It spreads harmful bacteria from one (or even from their boyfriend) to another. Share each other’s shoes? Look out for “athlete’s feet” and other fungus and disease. (Toenails may carry a damaging foot fungus.) One “highschooler” borrowed mascara and contracted an eye infection from the person she borrowed it from. A university sorority spread “trench mouth” around by sharing lip stick.

21- A little perfume goes a long way. The overuse of fragrance, typical by young men and ladies, makes them an unwanted spectacle. Your goal should be to carry no scent, until someone comes close.

Hair & Nails

22- Your hair should be clean and styled (not necessarily washed everyday), but shouldn’t be greasy.

23- Don’t hide your obvious assets. It’s a pity high school girls often hide their beautiful eyes with hair hanging down in their face! (Incidentally, teachers can still spot cheaters even through the hair.)

24- Be careful coloring your hair yourself. (This goes for guys as well.) The dye can color your scalp as well as making it not presentable. To remove excess color, wash your hair with shampoo several times.

25- Keep your hair clean and styled. Unkempt or dirty hair eliminates you from many guys’ lists.

26- Choose a hair style that enhances your features. Many choose hair styles worn by current celebrities that may or may not look good on them. Instead, research what current styles are best for the shape of your face. If a current “trendy” hairstyle won’t look good on you, don’t switch to it.

Example: Before making a big hair styling change decision, ask the opinion of people you trust including your stylist, Mom, friends, etc. Going from long beautiful hairstyle to the “bobb,” (so in your mind you can look like a “Spice Girl,”) may not make you look your best.

27- Get a mirror that allows you to see the back of your hair and style it! The back is as at least as important as the front. Beautiful hair seen from the back will encourage guys to maneuver to see your face. Men might not admit it, but they are fooled by seeing beautiful hair from the back, but when encountering the front, they learn it’s an old woman or a guy.

28- Nails should be all one length. Nail or toenail polish that’s chipped or wearing off, makes you look unkempt. (Too harsh? Just say it hurts your appearance). You don’t always have to wear polish, but if you do, it should always look fresh. Remove the old or put on a fresh coat.

Tip for keeping polish on Longer: Before applying polish, clean your hands (feet) and nails well to remove oils. Next, use a cotton ball to rub each nail with nail polish remover. This helps the polish adhere better and stay on longer. A base coat with a top coat will help keep it in tact.

B.   POSTURE

29- Your posture is critical to your overall looks! Most girls don’t realize its importance. Instead they mostly concentrate on hair and make up. Good posture not only gives you a confident look, but is VERY attractive. An informal survey revealed guys feel posture is as important as hair to an overall look.

Long ago, I was a choral teacher. To help all students sing better, I told them to stand and sit tall. It didn’t work! So, I told them to sit and stand as if they were hanging by the hair on the crown of their head. Their posture and singing dramatically improved. Amazingly enough both sexes were noticeably better looking. It’s so simple!

C.   CLOTHING

30- Wear clothing that is appropriate for your body type. Be aware, very tight clothing accentuates all your body’s imperfections including thighs, belly fat, wrinkles, etc.

31- Choose your wardrobe carefully. To help you define your style, there are many information sources to assist you, from T.V. and websites to fashion magazines. If you aren’t good at matching colors or selecting outfits, you might need some help from a clothing expert. One of the easiest, most economical ways is to target more expensive pieces (coats, suits and skirts) in a single neutral color such as blue, tan, black, white, etc. (Real skill and money is required to mix stripes and plaids.) Later, you can add less expensive pieces in patterns and colors to accentuate your outfits. This will help expand your wardrobe.

32- What about Tattoos? Yes, they are currently a fashion statement. “You decorate your house, why shouldn’t we decorate our bodies? I mean, everybody’s getting at least one.” Here are some thoughts to consider before getting a tattoo:

Tattoos can limit your choice of wardrobe

a)  We all understand that tattoos are PERMANENT figures and designs, not on, but in your skin! You can redecorate your home, changing colors and locations. But, you can never change a tattoo.

b)  Tattoo figures and designs “clash” with clothing designs limiting your clothing options. Most well-dressed people know not to mix stripes and plaids. Tattoo designs and figures clash with most patterns so you are limited to clothing without patterns.

c)  Many tattoos have a color element that may “clash” with other colors you’d like to wear; like red against  orange, or orange and purple.

d)  Tattoos are unsightly when wearing a wedding dress or a bridesmaid’s dress. Cosmetic professionals report that even at the slowest time of the year, at least 2 weekly requests for a tattoo cover-up product are made. During the Spring season, the requests are nearly non-stop. (Recommended is “Dermablend” including primer and leg & body cover.)

e) As you grow older, tattoos fade, droop and sag making a beautiful rose look like it’s about to “croak.” I encountered an old sailor whose arms had long phrases tattooed on his arms. They were illegible.

Tattoos can limit your social mobility

f) Tattoos are seldom associated with classy, sharp people. Beauty queens never have them. (Please don’t confuse Hollywood stars with high society. They are only entertainers.)

g)  Some girls get a tattoo on their backs which guys commonly call a “tramp stamp.” Would you rather be treated as a “tramp” or a fine lady? Don’t think ill of me – I’m just asking.

h) Later, they can embarrass you, clash with colors of outfits and even prevent you from gaining employment. (A policeman friend had to have one cut off his arm, so he could get hired.

God made each of us in his image. I’d say you’re pretty perfect the way you are!

f) The Bible explains in Leviticus19:28 where the Israelites were given practical and moral laws, God said: you shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor tattoo any marks on you: I am the Lord.

So, before you decide to get a tattoo, consider the long-term implications. My thought is: How can anyone improve perfection – your body? You may regret this decision one day. I’m just sayin’ . . . .

33- Be careful about letting others write on your skin with pens and markers. For some reason school girls allow others to do this. There’s lots of smearing with mistakes crossed out or adapted, so this body “art” looks sloppy and amateurish. Why would you allow another girl to make your skin look ugly? Are they trying to eliminate competition?

D. MANNERS

There are a number of things I’ve seen while teaching that are very unbecoming.

34 – Applying cream to legs in class. Hey! Others are watching you!!! I acknowledge the necessity of leg cream from time to time. However, it’s best not to do it in public. Find a restroom. How would you like to see a guy cutting his toenails?

35) A girl picking her nose, then covering her face so you couldn’t actually see her eating it!

36) It’s proper etiquette to chew with the mouth closed. This will separate you from less classy females. You many have never thought of it before, but there are right and wrong ways to chew gum. Chewing with the mouth open is loud and noisy. I’ve heard classy people comparing this to a big ol’ cow chewing her cud.

37- Cover your mouth when you yawn, cough or sneeze. Nobody (male or female) wants to see what’s in your mouth or get hit with spray from your saliva glands.

38- Never belch (loud burp). Sometimes this is done as a joke and gets a laugh. However, you forever lose your position as a lady with those who heard it. You’ll earn the same result by cursing, talking about unseemly bodily functions and using four-letter words.

39- I noticed a girl sitting in the front row of class that had just left physical education. She proceeded to apply deodorant in English class by sticking her arms under her blouse. Worse yet, another girl asked to borrow it and applied it from the same container. DISGUSTING! Guys sitting in the back of the room had a big laugh!

III.    “TURN ONS” and “TURN OFFS”

40- When with a boy, have eyes only for him. I often see girls with their boyfriends looking around at people around them. Other guys recognize this as disrespectful, a lack of integrity and not trustworthy.

41- Eat like a lady, not like it’s the first meal you’ve had this week! Remember, you’re not in a race. How do you eat chicken and French fries? With a knife and fork. Never learned? Start practicing now. It’s difficult, but will set you apart from other girls. TIP: When ordering food, tell your date what you’d like, so he can order for you. Almost always choose something that can be eaten with a knife and fork. Sandwiches sometimes are too large and messy leaving lots of residue on your mouth and hands. If you’re stuck with a sandwich, remove the top bun and eat  the rest with a knife and fork.

42- Don’t talk with your mouth full. First of all, you can’t be understood. Secondly, pieces will fly out of your mouth into your date’s soup. After they submerge, he can’t locate them to remove ‘em. Actually, no one likes to see the mixture of the food and saliva inside your mouth. It’s really gross! Experiment: Fill your mouth with chewed food and look in the mirror with your mouth open. (That’s called see (sea) food!

43- No arms or elbows on the table when eating. Don’t guard your food as if protecting it from wild animals. (It doesn’t matter how bad your date’s manners are. Don’t waver.) Take one hand and place it on your lap while you’re eating, unless you’re cutting your food. When eating at school use the same good manners. Good manners will become a habit and may even help you get a job later in life. (Remember: People are watching much more than you know.)

44- After eating remove the food between your teeth. Go to the restroom armed with a toothpick or toothbrush to make certain your smile doesn’t include something like a piece of lettuce.

45- Are you stuck up? Are you just a little too good for anyone?

Think you’re pretty special? If so, most guys won’t like you. Don’t stick your nose in the air, having a condescending look. Don’t think more highly of yourself than others. This includes thinking you’re too good for anyone who doesn’t have a huge bank account or of your supposed “social standing.” Please realize we are not suggesting you “act” like people of lower social class, just be friendly!

Zig Ziglar once said, “Of all the diseases known to man, conceit is the weirdest of them all. It makes everybody sick except the one who has it.”

46- Don’t swear. Fowl language is a major turn off. It’s embarrassing and shows your lack of intelligence. Come up with better more descriptive words to express yourself.

47- Be courteous and nice to every male, no matter his age – but don’t flirt. Everyone takes notice when someone is nice to them. You’ll get a great reputation and many more guys will respect you. Oh yes, a side benefit! You haven’t eliminated yourself when someone you’re not currently interested in, becomes the hottest guy in town!

IV.  UNDERSTANDING GUYS

There’s a long tradition of guys buying a diamond ring for a girl. Then on bended knee, presenting the ring to the girl, asking her to marry him! Why an expensive diamond ring? It’s to show he can support her and give her a wonderful home!

In some countries boyfriends offer to give the father of the bride things of great value such as a dozen sheep, cows or other large animals. Why? It’s to show he can take care of her!

Sadly today, some girls show their desperation, buying their own rings. What are they thinking? If a guy wants to marry you, he should show he can support you! If he can’t support you now, what makes you think he’ll be able to support you later?

Here are common sense thoughts:

48- Don’t ever lend a guy money, except in an emergency situation (such as he’s out of gas and you can’t get home). Deep in your heart you should know he’ll never pay you back. If you loan it, just kiss your money and him goodbye. Remember, guys borrowing money from girls show poor character. If he can’t afford you now, what makes you think he can afford you when you are married? Don’t waste your time. Spend your time and effort on guys who prove they are worthy of you!

I’ve met ladies who married poor guys going through “Med School” to become doctors. The ladies paid for everything while their husbands went to school. After graduation, now making good money, the doctors found a new young “thing” ditching their loyal wife who had sacrificed with the promise they’d make much more money later.

49- Make certain the guy has a job or at least is working hard. In the Bible Adam had a job BEFORE God gave him a wife. You can exchange gifts with a guy, just don’t go overboard. TV courtroom “reality shows” feature case-after-case of women who gave money and gifts to their boyfriends. Time after time, the boyfriend dumped his girlfriend and stuck her with the bill.

50- Only allow a guy to treat you badly or disrespectfully ONCE. Sadly, many guys treat ladies poorly – even terribly. We’ve all heard of battered women by their husbands. Are the  still womenconvinced there’s a real love opportunity there? There’s an old adage – “Fool me once it’s your fault. Fool me twice, it’s my fault.

Once I saw a young man dragging his date inside a store by the hand in true “caveman” fashion. He barely made it through the door as it was closing. She didn’t – banging her head and side into heavy glass door as it was closing. Ladies deserve better! Don’t allow yourself to be disrespected or abused.

51- Younger men have a tendency to “show-off” and/or forcefully “tease” girls to gain their attention. This includes spinning car tires, loud roaring engines, picking on her, doing rude things in front of her, etc. In their “warped little minds” they think these will favorably gain YOUR attention. If you’re not interested, don’t pay attention. They’ll stop.

52- Be a lady and let the man be a man. I’m not suggesting you avoid weight lifting. It has nothing to do with strength. Just don’t be domineering, pushing him around. (Incidentally, no amount of “nagging” will change him.) If you want change – pray for him!  There’s an old joke with some truth in it that goes; “Ladies marry a man hoping he’ll change! Guys marry a girl hoping she won’t!” Both get disappointed.

53- Guys can’t stand incessant talkers especially on subjects only girls care about – hair, nails and gossip! The guy is thinking “Will she ever just shut-up?” (Yes, guys often do the same to ladies. If he does that to you, find another guy.)

54- Don’t be possessive, clutching or clingy! Guys consider this obsessive and oppressive! It drives guys away. You don’t own him and he doesn’t own you. You’re just dating! Give him space and he’ll be attracted. Guys like their freedom, too. The best way to catch a guy is to let him catch you! So, don’t constantly call him. To keep him – gently keep your distance. He’ll like you even more!

55- Work on being a good conversationalist. Guys get extremely frustrated with girls who can’t carry on a conversation! Questions asked may get a “that’s nice” answer.  Suggestion: Ask guys “open-ended” (who, what, where, why) questions. Now, they can’t just say yes or no. Using “why” questions forces the other person to answer in more length. Get the guy to talk about himself, then ask why, if appropriate. Example: Did you like it where you grew up? Why? What did you like to do when you were growing up? Why do you like them?

56-   Never tell your guy how attractive someone else is. Most men have VERY fragile egos. It makes him feel like he’s your second choice. Instead, build him up. Don’t give him a big head, but just encourage him to accomplish great things. Guys love and need your support (being looked up to) respected and relied upon. This is a very common need for all men!

57- Dump him quickly if he doesn’t pay attention to no-go zones! Sexual advances are disrespectful and assumptive. Remember, the prime objective of guys – SEX. He may touch your hands, arms, shoulders and back (upper & middle) only. All other places are an invasion of privacy! I recently saw a 13-yr-old boy walking with a girl. His hand moved down onto her rear. She was noticeably uncomfortable. If the girl’s father had been watching, he would have “punched the kid’s lights out!” Don’t be afraid to confront the male as soon as he steps over the line. Stop him in his tracks!

V.     DATING

You probably don’t understand now, but dating although fun and exciting is a tremendous learning experience as well as very serious. I compare it to a huge obstacle course.

Way back when I was just a young lady, no one told me I was special. I figured as soon as I caught the attention of a cute boy, I would do anything to keep hold of him. I got “stood up,” treated poorly and still took him back. Now, I realize you don’t have to put up with any guy’s bad behavior!

If I had to begin dating all over today, I’d be much more careful. I’d inspect the fruit of his life including:

-          What kind of job he has

-          Asking what my friends and family think of him

-          Watching how he treats his parents and others

-          Learning how his parents treat people and each other

-          Finding out what his friends were like

Here are additional questions to get answered before accepting the offer of a date. These can save you from a rotten date, help you dress appropriately and even avoid serious trouble! Remember, what happened to Natalie Holloway in Aruba. She got stuck with a murderer!

58- Are you attracted to him or even like him? Qualify your dates carefully. Don’t go out – just to go out. If you don’t really care for him, tell him you’d like to get to know him better around school or work.

59- Where does he want to take you? What is the date to consist of? How should you dress? Where exactly are you going; what time should be expect to be home, etc.

If he’s taking you to a “bug tussle,” don’t wear a prom dress. In fact maybe you’d not like to go out with him at all. Don’t go out with a guy who doesn’t have a plan! (“Whata you wanna do?” “I don’t know. What do you want to do?” “I dunno.  Whata you wanna do?” “I don’t know, whata . . .” )

Just hangin’ around the house repeatedly, shows that he isn’t concentrating on pleasing you. Hey! He doesn’t have to spend a lot of money on you. He just needs to have a plan. He could always take you for a romantic walk in a park

60- Is he asking you on a date at the last moment? If so, resist the temptation to say yes. You won’t be at your best and he certainly won’t. Yes, I know the feeling of being home on a Friday night. But, don’t risk a bad date.

61- Don’t ever pay for a date. (You’ve already spent 10 times more on your clothes, hair and ”make up” than he’ll ever spend.)

62- If a guy likes a certain perfume but you hate it – get it and wear it for him! He’ll be very attracted to you. Remember: You are not trying to attract yourself, but him!

63. Does he treat you disrespectfully? Don’t stand for it! If your date shows up in an undershirt, explain you’re sorry he didn’t have time to dress for the date. You’ll wait for him while he changes.

64. Does he open the door for you and treat you courteously? If not, he’s only thinking about himself. I suggest just waiting for him. Go out to the car, then wait for him to open the door. When you arrive, stay seated in the car until he opens the door for you. When you come to a door, wait outside until he opens the door for you. If he resists this, you’ve done a poor job of qualifying him as a date. Immediately, use the phone and call for a ride home. Don’t worry about your reputation. Make it a “short” evening. Don’t go out with him any more. If He does it once, he’ll do it again!! Eventually you’ll find a trustworthy guy who will treat you like a lady. (You’ll also teach your date to be a gentleman.)

65. Don’t ever aggravate a guy so much he strikes you. Most women are excellent verbal fighters. If you fight a guy verbally, he’ll get frustrated and may exert himself physically. No, it’s never acceptable! If there’s any violence in a relationship, end it now! If you’re frustrated, quit going out with him.

Group Dates

66. I see girls hanging out at malls, waiting to meet guys. (As parents, this worries us!) It shows guys desperation and the girl will do anything to get a guy. My advice: if you don’t have a date, don’t go! Better yet, go out with friends. You’ll eventually find the right guy when you least expect it. Don’t go “hang out.” You are setting yourself up for a very dangerous situation.

67. When you don’t know a guy very well, here’s a great idea. Suggest that you go on a group date. You invite him along with a group of your common friends to go out for a Pepsi, bowling, etc. just to talk. This gives you the opportunity to visit without having to be totally alone with him and find out how he fits in with your friends. (Oh yes, make certain your friends know he is “yours.”)

VI. THE PRIME MOTIVE OF GUYS

By now you understand we care for you. Now, we’ll be brutally honest. Please consider this next subject as grandparents’ advice. It is intensely personal. This information all fathers know, but few feel comfortable sharing it with their daughters. Its contents are why Dads usually present very strong opposition to the guys you date. (Hope we don’t shock you too much.)

There’s a real difference between guys and ladies enumerated well by Dr. James Dobson on his “Focus on the Family” radio program.

For the most part . . .

Ladies crave love, so they “play around” at sex.

Guys crave sex, so they “play around” at love.

Since guys have a laser-beam focus on sex. They utilize various techniques to get what they want. In days past flowers, candy, fancy restaurants, presents, poems, etc. were used. Today, many guys rely on alcohol and drugs to break down a girl’s defenses. Guys may pretend to be hurt, cry, pout, tell you they love you, as well as saying that they must try something before they buy it. Remember, their prime objective – sex! As a girl’s defenses are worn down, the guy gets to his main objective.

As your adopted grandfather, let me explain why sex before marriage NEVER benefits you. Yes, I know you have a sex drive as well, but it is not as strong” as the male’s. For him it’s all consuming! Possibly you have heard of pro athletes who have regular sex with dozens and even hundreds of girls. Some have children with as many as 18 different women. Is that what you are interested in?

No! Don’t ever think you can change a guy. “Forgetaboutit!” I’m very serious!

VII.     COMMON SENSE BENEFITS TO WAITING UNTIL MARRIAGE

A- Marriage although wonderful has rough spots. Sexual intimacy between husband and wife helps get over these very tough times. Also, it builds up men, giving them confidence to battle the rough workplace and succeed. It makes home, a place of refuge from the cruel world’s disappointments and trials.

B – When 2 people are intimate, part of the other person’s personality is exchanged. If your guy has had multiple partners, you are receiving part of his former partners. This is a little understood reality!

C- You may pick up diseases that the other person’s partners have. These sexually transmitted diseases can last forever requiring a lifetime of antibiotics, worry and regret. Someone currently studying these diseases, explained “I will never sleep with another woman until I am married.” The risk is just too great!

D- A lady (not diligent) gets stuck with the results; pregnancy, raising & paying for a child alone, sexual transmitted diseases and regret. The guy? He just goes on to his next conquest. Remember: guys play around at love to get to their prime objective. Many ladies, desiring love, are easily persuaded.

Key: Passion and Love are not the same – especially to the guy!

Biblical Reasons Benefits to Waiting until Marriage

Here is what the Bible says about premarital sex and sex with/by someone already married. (Fornication is the word used in the Bible meaning sex before marriage. Adultery is the word used to describe husbands or wives cheating on their mates.)

A – Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. – Hebrews 13:4

B – He who overcomes all, inherits all things, and I WILL be his God and he SHALL be My son. But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death. – Revelation 21:7-8

C- For this you know, that no fornicator, unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has ANY inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. . Ephesians 5:5-6

D-  . . . adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in the time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. – Galatians 5:19-21

Important – You can be forgiven: If you have done some of these things, don’t worry. Just ask for God’s forgiveness (promising not to do them again) in the name of Jesus. He’ll forgive you! If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. – I John 1:9

Get alone in a quiet place and just say humbly, “Father God I come to you to admit I’ve done wrong in your sight. Please forgive me for my sin of __(whatever it is)____. Cleanse me from everything I’ve done wrong, because I want to spend eternity with you. Thank you Father.  Amen.

VIII.   CONCLUSION

Guys and ladies are wired completely differently. Guys are all about the physical and don’t understand why a beautiful kitchen, bedroom and living room are so important to a lady. Ladies look out the window, see a cute little deer and speaks to it in a high-pitched voice. Guys are different. We look out the window, acknowledge its beauty, then determine to kill it for dinner!

There’s an anecdote of a study done asking women what they wanted from a husband and men from wife. Look at these contrasts. It’ll tell you volumes about the differences between the sexes.

What women want

1^st A beautiful peaceful home

2^nd 2-3 car garage

3^rd Lots of jewelry

4^th A kitchen with a beautiful view

5^th Love and affection

What Guys want

1^st Sex

2^nd Sex

3^rd Sex

4^th Sex

5^th and bring food

There’ll be many applicants to become your life’s partner. Only one guy should make it through all the challenges by using a combination of kindness, integrity and common sense. If you find the right guy, he’ll continue to date you after you’re married. You’ll have something all the women of the world will envy.

The ultimate reward will be finding the perfect teammate for you. This dating adventure will help you find someone who will love, respect and work with you toward common goals. Together, you’ll become greater and stronger than the sum of your individual parts and abilities.

Do you have any great dating advice or tips of your own? Email us back. We’d love to hear them!

END

The authors Jim B.M.E.A., M.M. and Diane L.C.,T.L.M.S. raised 4 adult, married children in a Christian home. Diane is a licensed beautician and Jim an experienced teacher, businessman and performer.

For Advice to Young Men see http://everydaychristianfamily.com/dating-courting-advice-tips-for-guys/

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1. The Delivering Power of God from Years of Abuse
2. You Are A Valuable Person!
3. A Guide To Famous & Fun Bible Stories!

Why Give Presents Willingly!

There is a little known principle – seldom (if ever) taught in school – vital in life to helping everyone succeed. This is a common-sense principle every farmer knows – planting and harvesting! Also known as sowing and reaping, it involves the following:

• Planting a seed in good soil at the right time of the year
• Watering the area where it is planted
• Guarding it from all invaders including insects, weeds (kids in dune buggies) etc.
• And waiting patiently (for weeks, months and even years)

Eventually, if the farmer is patient, diligent in protecting it and consistent in his approach, a plant will grow, providing fruit, vegetables or other valuable commodities. This always works and never fails.

For each kernel of corn planted, a farmer gets back 3 ears of corn. On each ear of corn there are at least 12 rows totaling 600-800 kernels. So the farmer gets back 1800-2400 times what he planted in the ground. (That’s a pretty nice return on investment.) Notice, he gets more back of what he planted: corn for corn kernels, grapes for grape seeds and apples for apple seeds. He never gets back grapes when he plants corn, etc. He gets back in kind exactly what he plants.

In our lives we also get back what we plant! When we show love to people, we get back exactly what we planted – IF we are careful to use the same principles of planting:

• Giving to a good person
• Consistent attention
• Protecting our relationships from hard feelings, selfishness and bad influences
• and waiting patiently

Notice farmers don’t know which of the seeds will grow into healthy plants, so they plant lots of seeds. Farmers are always looking for more fertile land to plant! Therefore, farmers plantt as many seeds as they have room for on their property. He also invests in – as much big machinery as he can afford to harvest the crop he knows will come in.

Also notice the farmer doesn’t grudgingly plant the kernels, saying “I could have eaten this seed, but nooooooo. I had to plant it. That stinking farm is stealing my seeds.” That’s ridiculous! No! He plants with expectation, hoping it will produce 1800-2400 times their investment. (Heck, even a drug dealer knows to invest in product to sell at a profit.)

In our lives none of us know which seeds planted will produce great and loyal relationships. However, planting and harvesting always works! If we plant good with others, we’ll get back good – 1800-2400 times what we plant. But if we plant anger and bitterness with others, guess what we’ll get back? Yep, anger and bitterness – in huge amounts.

I urge you to consider freely giving genuine concern, smiles, happiness and love to others (patiently) – regardless of who they are. You’ll eventually be delighted with the results.

True concern is patient; kind; endures wrongs done to us; doesn’t envy, show off, brag – Isn’t rude or only concerned about ourselves – Isn’t happy to see wrongs done to others, but is happy to see and hear truth; it bears all things and believes in everyone’s good without weakening. Therefore, I recommend giving good, concern and love to others. If someone has never given to you, give to them anyway, never expecting anything back. However, I promise you, you’ll get an amazing harvest if you are patient!

When we give gifts to others – EVEN THOSE WHO DON’T DESERVE THEM – we WILL get a return on our investment if we follow the common sense principles of planting and harvesting – aka reaping and sowing!

Related posts:

1. Wisdom, Knowledge, Understanding
2. Advice & Tips for Ladies before Dating
3. Lies

A Little Jolt for Your Week!

Here’s an interpretive translation of Romans 8:38-39 using the true meaning of the Greek taken from “Sparkling Gems From the Greek” (a daily devotional) by Pastor Rick Renner of Russia.

I have been persuaded, and I remain convinced, that neither death, nor the complications that often arise in life, nor powerful angelic beings, nor even an entire group of high-ranking demonic spirits, nor anything that currently exists, nor anything that could potentially happen in the future, nor any political power, nor anything in the highest heavens, or anything that resides in the deepest depths, nor anything that has ever been created is capable of disconnecting us from the love of God or of putting any distance between us and the love of God, which is in Jesus Christ our Lord.

I know you may have made a mess of things in your life – both business wise and personal. However, God still loves you. Therefore, go to 1st John 1:9 to clean yourself up!

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. New King James

But if we confess our sins, he will forgive our sins. We can trust God. he does what is right. He will make us clean from all the wrongs we have done. New Century Version

. . . if we admit our sins – make a clean breast of them – He won’t let us down; he’ll be true to Himself. He’ll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing. The Message.

So take action now. Keep your list of sins short! Ask for His forgiveness. Then you can smile, because the greatest power in the universe knows your name and loves you unconditionally. Because of the blood that Jesus shed for YOU, He loves you and will never leave nor forsake you. You can absolutely count on that!

Remember what Billy Graham said, “Read the Bible. Work hard and honestly. And don’t complain.”

This is going to be a wonderful week!

Related posts:

1. Successful Sales Presentations
2. Encouragement!
3. What’s The Big Deal About Conversing With Eleanor Roosevelt & Gandhi?

A Layman’s Bible Manual

I’m surprised how little,  many “educated” know about The Bible’s 66 books. But where does one start to introduce the Bible to someone who has no knowledge of  the oldest, most reliable historical account ever written.**

Separated into Old and New Testaments, each is further divided into “Books” as listed below. To find passages easily, each book is split into “Chapters” & further subdivided into short phrases or “Verses” – numbered sequentially. Scripture lookup may look like Gen 1:11 (Book- name-abbreviation, Chapter, Verse).

OLD TESTAMENT

Has 39 books and completed by 125 B.C. by the Jews

The Pentateuch

Genesis – Origin – Abraham; Flood; 12 Tribe Names

Exodus – Out of Egypt to Israel; Moses; Miracles

Leviticus – Holiness; Offerings; Laws; Foods

Numbers – Counting Tribes; Years in the Wilderness

Deuteronomy – 10 Commandments; Chap 28 “The Blessings and the Curses”; 29:29

The Historical Books

Joshua – Reclaiming God’s Land; Be Strong/Courage

Judges – Israel’s rulers before Kings; Gideon; Samson

Ruth – Loyalty, Redeeming a relative

1 Samuel – 1^st king – Saul (David)

2 Samuel – 2^nd king – David and his deeds; Goliath

1 Kings – 3^rd king – Solomon; Split kingdom; Elijah

2 Kings – Elisha; Fall of Israel & Judah

1 Chronicles – Genealogy; King David

2 Chronicles – From King Solomon to the Captivity

Ezra – Israel’s return to Jerusalem

Nehemiah – Rebuilding Jerusalem

Esther – Haman’s attempt to exterminate all Israelites

The Poetic & Wisdom Books

Job – the oldest book; Satan against Job

Psalms – Author, David; Praise (118 times); 150 chapters; Center of Bible 118:8 (594 chapters before and after);

Key chapters – 1^st, 23^rd, 91^st, longest 119, shortest 117

Proverbs – Author Solomon; 31 chapters – 1 for each day of month; Wisdom

Ecclesiastes – Author Solomon; Man’s reasoning

Song of Solomon – God’s love for mankind

The Major Prophets

Isaiah- Predicts Christ’s Coming 700 yrs early;

Describes Christ 9, 11, 32, 42, 52-5; Satan 14:12-23

Jeremiah – Warning of Judgment; 29:11-13

Lamentations – Mourning for Jerusalem

Ezekiel – Visions & words of God

Daniel – Captivity; Heroic acts; Vision of the future

The Minor Prophets (short books)

Hosea – Redeeming Love – Key verses 2:23; 4:6

Joel – Day of the Lord; Holy Spirit 2:28-29

Amos – Judgment of sin

Obadiah – Doom of Edom

Jonah – God’s mercy & 1^st revival

Micah – Judgment & Kingdom, 6:8

Nahum – Nineveh’s doom

Habakkuk – Doubt to Faith; 2:2-3

Zephaniah – Day of the Lord

Haggai – Rebuilding Temple in Jerusalem

Zechariah – Messiah’s coming, 1:3-4, 4:6, 8:8

Malachi – Formalism rebuked; Last time God spoke to Israel (400 yrs before Christ).; Prospering 3:7-12

NEW TESTAMENT

Has 27 books and completed by 125 A.D.

The Gospels (Good News)

Matthew – Christ the king/God with us – birth to death

Mark – Christ the Servant

Luke – Christ the Man – birth to death

John – Christ in His deity, 14-15

Acts (of the Apostles) & The Holy Spirit

Author – Luke; Spread of Gospel, Miracles, Birth and Organization of the Church

Paul’s Letters (Epistles)

Romans –  Roman Road – 3:23, 6:23, 5:6 & 8; 10:9,11,13; Key verses – 8:1-2,28,32,35-39

1 Corinthians – Love 13; Gifts 12; Prophecy 14

2 Corinthians – Paul’s authority; 5:17; 9:5-8

Galatians – Salvation by grace; 3:13-13,26-29; 6:7; Fruit of the Spirit 5:22-23

Ephesians – Grace 1-3 and believer’s walk 4-6; Armor of God 6:11-18

Philippians – 1:6; 2:8-9; 3:20; 4:4-7, 8, 13, 19

Colossians – Christ (by & in Him/whom); 3:11

1 Thessalonians – Christ’s Return

2 Thessalonians – Day of the Lord

1 Timothy – Keeping Church in order; 2:8

2 Timothy – Fear 1:7; Bible is God breathed 3:16-17

Titus – Keeping Church in order

Philemon – Home Church; Escaped slave

Hebrews – Explaining Christ to Hebrews; Faith – 11

General Epistles

James – Jesus’ brother; 1:5-8, 17, 27

1 Peter – 2:9, 23-24; Marriage 3; Service 5:1-9

2 Peter – 1:16, 18, 20-21; 1:5-11; 3:9

1 John – You are forgiven 1:9; Love 4; 5:14-15

2 John – Warning 10; Woman pastor 5, 13

3 John – Walk in truth; Verse 2

Jude – Jesus’ brother; Contend for what you believe

(The) Revelation (of Jesus Christ)

Author: John; Unfolding of Future Events (some already transpired); 2^nd Coming of Christ; Description of Heaven & Hell

———————————–

**  This was designed to fit onto 1 page. If you’d like a copy of it, just leave a comment with your email address and I’ll send it to you. Additionally, I have a Bible Synopsis, God inspired me to write. It is also on 1 page and includes a 2nd page that includes over 300 scriptural references to verify the synopsis. It is entitled “Secrets Politicians Hide to Keep Control of You.” I’ll be happy to send either to you in Word.

Finally, as additional published resources on this Blog site to help introduce the Bible to others, please see http://everydaychristianfamily.com/test-your-history-book-knowledge/ and http://everydaychristianfamily.com/a-guide-to-famous-fun-bible-stories/ and http://everydaychristianfamily.com/i-cant-believe-its-in-the-bible/. There are additionally resources published on this website listed under the Category “Christian Living.”

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2. Advice & Tips for Ladies before Dating
3. I Can’t Believe It’s In The Bible!

How To Organize Your Words To Bring Businesses Gold

The value of a strong Unique Selling Position (or Proposition) and 30-second elevator pitches shouldn’t be underestimated. Vital to a company’s initial success, both separate it from competitors in the mind of prospects. Of course if competition already has these in place, a business may have to play catch-up!

Here’s an example of a fictitious company to help sharpen clarity on this subject. Let’s pretend you are want to buy mustard.  Obviously, you can find it in many places.

• Large chain grocery stores that sell 80% of what is sold
• The neighborhood convenient food mart or gas station
• Specialty meat markets
• George’s

Speaking for myself, I’d get mustard from a familiar place where I’m in the habit of shopping.

Where would you choose and why? I’m guessing “George’s” would be your last choice, because you don’t know what George’s is – there’s no “Outside Perception”. Is it a dress shop? A donut shop? A gift shop? Who knows? Nothing against George, but we are all too busy to find out what “George’s” is!

For George to survive he must separate himself from competition. He could hire a marketing firm and lawyer spending $30,000 and months of time registering “Condiments R Us”, designing a new logo and changing his signs, labels, letterhead, aprons, etc. or for a fraction of the cost he could develop a USP in just a few carefully-chosen words. These explain the (hidden) Inside Reality of his business, letting the public know it through free listings and normal advertisements.

This information will then become George’s Outside Perception? Let’s create a USP so we know what George’s is.

Unique Selling Position or Proposition

“George’s” – Mustards For Health Conscious Connoisseurs

Elevator Pitch

Next, a short elevator pitch must be written separating “George’s Mustard” from the competition. (An elevator pitch is a short description of a company that can be delivered is a short amount of time – i.e. as an elevator travels between 2 floors or while waiting in a grocery line.)

Most are unaware that mustards found in grocery stores are grown using pesticides, then mixed during processing with preservation chemicals. In fact some jars found on shelves can be over 7-years old. Yes, the mustard your child eats may have been made, before he was born!

But George’s organically grown mustards have been hand-picked with in the past month, then selected for taste, color. Ground daily –using organically grown – no pesticides, no chemicals. George’s has the largest, healthiest, freshest, most tasty collection in the entire Midwest. Please stop by for a FREE sample of any of our 112 varieties from Swiss Mocha Dujon to Missouri Wine Poupon.

Think! Has your perception of George’s changed? What’s different? It’s the power of a strong USP and Elevator Pitch.

Conclusion

Possibly your company is one of the “George’s” of the world – laboring hard, but never quite able to break out. If you don’t currently have a strong, simple USP or an effective elevator pitch (2 minutes), take time to develop them, make them part of all your advertisements and all visual representations of your company. You may even teach them to all your employees, so they can more effectively tell people who they work for and actually become mobile advertisements.

For strong advice for business owners to help save money on advertising go to:  http://everydaychristianfamily.com/4-traps-to-avoid-for-successful-ads/

(Edwards Business Associates helps businesses by developing effective USPs, elevator pitches, phone scripts, Ads, business plans and other Strategic Marketing tools to separate your company from the competitors so prospects will search you out and accept no others – regardless of price! Are your current marketing pieces making you money or wasting it? You can know with a FREE 20-minute evaluation of an Ad, letter, brochure or yellow page entry, contact us. No Hype – No Pressure!)

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I  met a young mother several years ago when helping her family move to a new home. Never without a smile on her face, I believe her story is riveting and will be an encouragement to you. For no matter how difficult you life has been, you can be victorious through Christ who strengthens you. Get to know Jesus and he’ll help you turn your life completely around. Remember, it’s not how you start life – but how you finish!

Here’s her testimony:

“I watch as each scene from my life plays before me.  Every clip is a flash of light.  Like a documentary, they tell story of my life.  These are my memories.  Yet, as I watch them, I do not feel pain or anger.  The liquid love of Jesus has seeped into, and healed every crevasse of my once broken heart.

A smoke filled room.

About 20 hippies are crammed into our living room.  I hear the words, peace, love, and screw the government.  My lungs are burning as I take a toke of the joint a man has just handed me.  The upside down American flag hanging on our wall begins to dance and blur.  My mother passes me a joint.  I try to breathe in the smoke but start to cough, then I feel the sting of her slap across my face as she screams, “You’ve just wasted my good dope!”   I am six…

FLASH

Now I am three.  I look between my legs and can tell that I’ve been broken.  As I watch this clip it becomes too fuzzy to see.

(God has a way of protecting us from some memories)

FLASH

I wake up unable to breath.  I open my eyes and see my mother’s face inches from mine.  Her cold hands are tightly squeezing my neck.  I struggle to free myself.  Finally she lets go.  As I gasp for air she quietly explains, “You’ll stop wetting your bed if I do this to you.”  She is right, now when I am about to wet the bed I feel like I can’t breathe, wake up, then run to the bathroom.

FLASH

She has lifted me by my hair and is banging my head against the wall.  I am not crying – only waiting for it to end.

The flashes keep coming.  I feel exhausted as each memory is played.  But then something starts to change.

I now am seven and have just wondered into a small white church, across the alley from where we are living.  My feet are bare and as tough as leather.  My brown hair a dirty tangled mess.

The people are smiling at me and asking if I am there for Sunday school.  I don’t know.  They direct me to a room filled with singing and laughter.  I take my place in a circle of children and find myself singing with them.  I love this place!

Later in the week I am knocking at the door of the small white church.  A kind man answers and tells me to come back on Sunday.  I don’t know when that is, so I come everyday.  The man says they are praying for me.  I don’t know what that means.

Finally . . . The flashes stop.

Now I understand….

When the people at that small white church started to pray, God was able to move in my life.

Shortly after stepping into that Church we went to visit my Grandparent’s in Saint Louis.  They, along with the help of my older sister that had been raised by them, were able to get a judge to order my mother out of my life.

At the age of eight I became a ward of the court. For years I had nightmares and would wake up screaming. But then look around and realize that no matter where I was living at the time, I was safe.  My mother could not touch me.

At the age of ten a lady started taking me to a spirit filled prayer meeting that reminded me of the little white church.  It was at one of these meetings that I asked Jesus into my heart and got filled with the Holy Spirit.  I remember what I used to describe as, “The empty yuck feeling inside me” going away, and a feeling of joy and peace taking its place.  This is when I started to heal!

35 Years Later

I am now married to a hardworking Christian man that loves me with his whole heart. Together we have been blessed with two children that have grown up knowing Jesus.  When I look at them I realize how much God has done in my life!

I have seen my Mother twice since I was taken from her.  Although she has never apologized, I have forgiven her.  I choose not to have her as a part of my life, or the lives of my children.  I have come to understand that forgiveness does not mean you have to let that person back into your life.  Sometimes we must use wisdom.

My Mother still calls herself a hippie.  She continues to take drugs and is often homeless.  When she writes, her letters are very unconnected and hard to understand.  Sometimes these letters are full of hate and rage.

But I have forgiven her.  And I know this because…

When I pray for my Mother I want what is good.  I know that God loves her! I also know that she is the way she is, not only because of her choices, but because of  her own painful childhood.

God healed the broken little girl within me.  The broken little girl within my mother never healed.  I know that God wants to heal her.  But he can only do this if she gives her heart and life to him.

Although she is now in her 70’s, I believe it is not too late!

Because….WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!!”

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A Marketing Book for the 21^st Century

Want to succeed in business in the 21^st Century? Time to reorient your brain toward profit! What worked in the past bears little resemblance to what will work now. “You cannot bank on yesterday’s success” states Sergio Zyman. Former Chief Marketing Officer for Coca-Cola in The End of Marketing As We Know It. He packs the new realities for sales success into only 235 pages.

Not just a book, but more of an education than a book, it provides answers:

1)       How Barak Obama strategically won the presidency – page 99

2)       Popular advertisements that didn’t sell product, so wasted money

3)       Why mega-brands are a bad idea

4)       Why every company needs a strategy. (Otherwise your competitors will impose one on you!)

This book provides tons of gems to help you think daily about your business:

1)       “Consumption, definition, re-definition and reinvention are the essence of growth.”

2)       “Differentiation is critical; sameness has no value.”

3)       “You must be willing to change your mind in order to succeed.”

4)       “Under promise, then over deliver.” (Southwest Airlines key)

Want to be a terrific strategic marketer. Mr. Zyman shows how to

• Kill a category on page 37
• Neutralize the competition on page 35

The “end game” is to constantly change the definition of what you are doing, so your competition is constantly lagging behind. He states, “Remember a destination is nothing more than a new starting point.”

I found the goal of this book is to help you realize your “ultimate goal” in advertising – maximize profit!

• Sell as much product as possible;
• to as many people as possible;
• as often as possible; and
• at the highest prices possible.

I realize it is tough to wrap your mind around all these concepts immediately. That’s why you should invest in the book in hard cover. It will be usable for years to come.

The End of Marketing as We Know It by Sergio Zyman is one of the very few books you’ll own that provides new insight to increase business every time you read it. It provides cutting-edge thoughts that apply to marketing, advertising, selling and managing equally. (With my significant experience in all these areas including B-2-B and retail, I found this book applicable and fascinating.) I heartily recommend this volume.

Related posts:

1. Quality Quotations for Business
2. 4 Traps to Avoid for Successful Ads
3. Baking a Business Cake: New Perspectives on Planning For Success

The Science of Shopping

has never been so splendidly communicated than as in Why We Buy by Paco Underhill and published by Simon & Schuster. This book eloquently highlights problems, solutions and the “whys” of shopper motivation without self-aggrandizement, but simple, practical studies in behavior motivations of buyers.

With so much information to present, it is a wonder that it is organized so well in 19 chapters. As an avid highlighter (so I can brush up on my knowledge base at a later date) I recommend this volume should be purchased NOT just read on a Kindle or a Nook but a permanent addition to a library.

Frankly, the information is so valuable, because it was gained from the research of Envirosell, Inc.  it should be read in high school English classes rather than books on man’s baser instincts. It will help college-bound students immediately become more valuable to potential employers as they work their way through school. (Even with my significant experience in B-2-B and retail, I found this book fascinating.)

What’s best about the information given is that it is applicable in so many other situations. Real-life examples are taken from studies at banks, US Post Office, C-stores, pharmacies, supermarkets, discount stores, department, computer, automotive, internet, hardware and others. As I worked through this book I found it opened my mind also creating other solutions to business problems.

Mr. Underhill explains Retailing 101/s 3 aspects: design (the premises), merchandising (the store’s insides), and operations (what employees do). He continues with other salient points that will increase sales in any retail environment.

1) Why and how to create add on sales for major products (cross selling)

2) How to place products so they get more attention

3) How to better compete with web retailers

4) The dreaded “butt-brush” factor

5) The importance of quick service and check-out procedures

One story of special interest was how one retailer got rid of teenagers that were loitering in the parking lot at night. Hiring a security guard was too expensive and would cause many more problems, so a smart practical solution was found. “It began piping the smooth, suave sounds of Mantovani through the loudspeakers. No more loiterers.” This is an example of simple, common-sense solutions identified in this book.

Another question that was answered in my mind was “why must I listen to poorly performed and insipid rock music in stores?” (Ever notice how many times the word “Baby” is used the lyrics of today’s music?) Mr. Underhill mentions that while teenagers flee easy listening music as if it were anthrax, older shopper will tolerate just about anything.

Here are a few additional areas that are covered:

1) How to create specific selling environments for men and women

2) How to make it easier for older customers to shop

3) How to make it easier for larger people to shop

4) How to create and position signage so it is actually seen

No matter your retail environment exposure as a shopper, employee, manager or owner, Why We Buy – The Science of Shopping will help you modify your behavior to get more out of the experience.

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Shoe Size Conversion from USA to Metric

Tips from Jim Edwards – Master Shoe Fitter

In a rush the man pleaded “Do you have a size 7 black dress shoe? I’m on my way to my wedding!” Since ECCO lists on their box that a size 41 converts to a 7.0-7.5 I replied, “of course I do”. ECCO’s box lied! His foot swam inside the shoe.

Foreign-owned shoe marketers maximize shoe profit in the US by not producing narrows or wides, then try to justify the lack of sizes, “claiming” their shoe is perfect for all sized feet. Don’t you believe it! So here’s a table for more realistic shoe conversion from European to U.S. standards?

Shoe Conversion Table US to Metric
(Bold Sizes Carried in US Stores)

To convert a US shoe size to United Kingdom standard, simply take the size and reduce it one whole number. (Example, US 10 would be a UK 9.)
Remember, Men’s normal width is usually a “D”. Women’s feet are often more narrow, so their shoe reflect a “B” width. Women who have unusually wide feet are often quite happy with a man’s size IF the style is suitable for their tastes.

Related posts:

1. Foot Odor Remedies: No More Stinky Feet