Experience and observations .....

Yun hota toh kya hota? what if?

2014-10-13T01:49:00.001+05:30

How many times we wonder - Yun hota toh kya hota? i.e what if? How many times we become harsh on ourselves for not making right choices. We blame fate, destiny and our ignorance. We fail to understand that any information is incomplete and is distorted by prejudices. In spite of this, one has to make decisions all the time and hope that results are in our favour. Unfortunately, Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.

Decisions are good or bad only in hindsight. Decision are more often than not rationalized in hindsight. Future is uncertain and uncertainty is scary. We all love the idea of pre-concieved plans, but often forgets that most stories are made coherent by connecting the dots backwards. If we read about any success story which is told sincerely, we'll identify that to what extent was it influenced by luck and how things just fell in place. Nobody goes out with a plan to build a Microsoft, Google or a Facebook. Mere smartness doesn’t guarantee success.

Besides ones knowledge, skills, experience and other talents, a lot depends on variables, be it people, place, time, to which, perhaps you have some or no control of. Gita also emphasizes on the Karma and not the result. Achievements and outcomes are not in ones hand, only the action is. According to Gita, Gyan Yogi doesn’t blame anyone for his situation. He knows, that his fortune/misfortune is dependant on many factors, not all of which are in his control. He simply takes charge of what situation he is in and focuses on what he can do, never letting anxiety of failure pull him back or confidence of success making him arrogant. He realizes that one must act and take corrective measures based on information in hand.

Mystery called Love

2014-10-05T21:33:00.000+05:30

What is love? We've been obsessed with this question for centuries, but despite that it still overwhelms us. The mere utterance of this four letter word conjures very strong emotions in us. Poets, writers,thinkers, philosophers,scientists,all have in there own ways, tried to decipher this great mystery.We have songs, poems, movies, novels, paintings, myths, legends on it.There are as many notions of love, as there are people alive to have them.

All our lives we search for someone to love. Someone who completes us. Someone whose sheer presence sparks happiness in us. Someone with whom, we can share our lives. We all have deep desires to find love. It projects our deepest longings and profound desires. Love is ubiquitous but still we find it hard to define. Everyone have some fuzzy notion about it.

Is love a feeling? A feelings of euphoria, high energy, sleeplessness and a constant craving for ones beloved. A feeling one has experienced, never before. But feelings are dynamic,they keep on changing.At certain time one feels deep affection for some person and at the other one might feels indifference for the same person. So clearly there is more to love, than this feeling of euphoria.

So is love a physiological craving then?An addiction to ones presence.An addiction which lights certain chemical centres in our brain like a narcotic addiction. Don't get me wrong, but evidence shows that the part of brain which lights up under cocaine intoxication and romantic love is same. But then why do this addiction wears out over time?

Well life is a product of evolution and so is love. It is natures way of perpetuating our species. To achieve that it has developed these reward systems in our brains. Once its job is done, it slowly wears out. According to scientific studies this period lasts between 6 months to 2 years. After that disillusionment sets in, emotions relax and imperfections and flaws appears. This sounds very pessimistic,right? Should we then succumb to natures trap and digest the fact that love comes with a shelf-life, if ones lucky 2 years. Make most of it. Enjoy the euphoria and then for rest of live in a loveless relationship.So are we just "biochemical puppets"?

Aristotle and other philosophers have recognized long ago, that our capacity for reason makes us so interesting. If we miss this, we miss almost everything that matters. Yes, it is true that intelligence gets hijacked by chemistry and hormones.But one can reign these natural urges through deliberation, thought and reason.To me love comes across as a conscious decision. It is a commitment one makes to stay together through thick and thin. Chemistry can bring us close, but before it runs out one must figure out conscious ways through reasoning which looks beyond chemistry. If you want to be with somebody then you have to give some part of yourself to accommodate them. You need to accept their imperfections, understand the differences and create space to accommodate them. We are loosing the profoundness of being together with each other in the name of freedom of choice. It is becoming all about ourselves. One must realize that love is giving at expense of self. Its about making each other better person.

In a relationship, if both people think about other,then it becomes a beautiful place to be in. If one thinks this way, its exploitation. If both don't think this way then it becomes compulsion. So what is the kind of relationship, you aspire to be in?

Mature love is a choice, make one, it'll make your life beautiful :)

Save our Deep waters :- An Inconvenient Truth about health of our Oceans

2014-09-27T01:51:00.000+05:30

In 2012, I went on a trip to Thailand. I got exposed to the breathtaking beauty of the oceans. The vibrant colour of fishes and corals blew my mind. I went for a certification course in scuba diving to cherish more of this surreal beauty which nature has to offer. My experience with diving in the open oceans broke lots of myth which i had about large sea predators like sharks. I had a notion which most of us have, that sharks are sea monsters who attacks humans.But when i first saw sharks in the open waters during my dives at Andaman, I got under awe of these beautiful, majestic and innocuous animals. Media has created all these myths around sharks and shark attacks. I started reading more about ocean life and was appalled by what I learned.

According to the research published in scientific journal Nature, only 10 percent of all large fish are left in oceans since 1950s [post onset of industrialized fisheries]. We are emptying the oceans at a fast pace, especially large predators like sharks, whales, blue tuna. Killing large predators have unknown global consequences as it would bring about a complete re-organization of ocean ecosystem.In past too we have seen the consequences of playing around with the food-web.The example below from China will summaries everything.

'Mao Zedong blamed rats, flies, mosquitoes and sparrows for the failure of the 1957 grain harvest.Mao ordered the massacre of 1.96 billion sparrows between March and November 1958, despite the objection of experts that sparrows were in fact the major defence of the grain fields against insects.The killing culminated on December 13, 1958, when Shanghai residents reportedly destroyed 194,432 sparrows.

Like the sparrow extermination order issued by a Prussian ruler in the late 18th century, Mao's sparrow-killing campaign had two serious consequences. First, insects destroyed more of the grain harvest than ever in 1959. Second, a generation of the Chinese youth internalized violence against the weak and defenceless as an acceptable behaviour in the name of serving the interest of "the people."The policy-induced famine of 1960-1962 killed 40 million Chinese.'

Similar effects can be triggered by killing sharks who sits at the top of food web and controls Eco-system. Sharks have survived for 450 million years, but may be gone within the next decades. Life within the oceans, covering 2/3rds of our planet, has enjoyed a relationship with sharks for about 450 million years.

I am not against fishing or consuming fishes as food. It is main source of protein in many countries. But the kind of fishing we are practising is unsustainable. And what is more surprising is that we all are in massive denial and don't quite understand that how close some of these species are to extinction. Not only are the oceans source of food but 50-70% of the oxygen on this planet comes from Oceans.

I want the sharks and whales to be there in the oceans when i take my 12 year old kid for diving. We still have a small window of opportunity to save our oceans. Please spread the awareness around.

Cinema is very powerful medium at generating empathy and communicating messages which mere words can't express. Here is the list of three important, informative and revealing documentary films around the topic of Ocean conservation and aquatic animals.

Sharkwater :- It is a beautiful and important Eco-documentary. It destroys lots of the myths created around sharks by media. We kill millions of sharks each year, while only 5 humans gets killed by "so-called" shark attacks. After watching this compelling documentary one will realize, who really is the victim. Stewart's documentary is an attempt in the quest to raise international awareness about a situation that is threatening to put sharks on the endangered list.
Link to these movies:-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBoNi_fLFlg&feature=share

The Cove :- It is a heartbreaking documentary about the captive dolphins exploited in oceanariums like Sea World and there mass slaughter at the cove in Taiji, Japan. The remorse of Richard O'Barry will move any soul. The scene where he narrates an instance of dolphin committing suicide out of depression in his hands, will bring tears in your eyes. This film includes many insights into the mistreatment of dolphins. It also brings our attention to the whaling practise which is still carried out in Japan under the gambit of culture and national identity. This movie was awarded academy award for best documentary in 2010.
Link to documentary :-
http://vimeo.com/88724551

Blackfish :- It is a heartbreaking examination of the maltreatment of large mammals like killer whales at Oceaniurms such as SeaWorld in the name of entertainment.Through interviews with the trainers and whale experts, it highlights inhumane practises where a deeply social creature like Orca is separated from its family and are kept in solitary confinement in woefully cramped enclosures. It tells how killer whales (along with countless other creatures) are stolen from their natural habitats,so that we can pay to watch them perform unnatural tricks for our cameras, and the owners can watch their bank accounts swell. Captivity of these large mammals is dangerous to the trainers and more importantly to the animal. If we really wanna watch these magnificent animals than we should go and watch them in the wild, the place they belong.
Link to documentary :- http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1vhr85_blackfish_shortfilms

Sabse bada rog, kya kahege log - The disease to please

2014-08-19T00:05:00.001+05:30

A couple wants to have an austere marriage but still they have to invite new found relatives revealed while preparing the guest list, thinking _____ ?

A Parent may be more than happy to marry their child to partner of their choice in an inter-caste marriage but hesitates, thinking _____?

A middle aged man wants to learn how to dance. But hesitates, thinking ____?

A wife is regularly abused by her husband and wants to walk out of this humiliation but can't because _____?

Parents are worried about their over aged unmarried children, thinking ____ ?

Most of us, in innumerable situations have abstained from doing what our heart desires, thinking “Log kya kahege” (What will people say)? Most of us are obsessed with seeking approval of others and are always worried about what would people say (The Log Kya Kahege syndrome - The Disease to Please ). We are all encompassed by this societal pressure in most aspects. All our complications in life when analyzed, stem from this single fear.

But why shouldn't we bother about what people think/ say. After all, we are social animals and it is in our very nature to seek approval from others for our deeds. Social conformity is the force binding society and we all know the merits of society, so it'll be stupid to argue and say “Damn society. I'll do how I please." We are part of society and fear of rejection and being frowned upon by society is a very rational fear. Public opinion matters and rightly so. But then what about free will? When should personnel happiness precede over public opinion and social approval? When should one show the gut to not succumb to this pressure. When questions like these questions starts worrying me, i am reminded of a folk tale which i read long back in Panchatantra.

A Father and son were coming back from market after buying a donkey. Father preferred to walk, so he asked his son to sit on Donkey. As they were walking, they passed a group of men, one of whom said- “Look at that lazy youngster, he lets his father walk while he rides”.Son was embarrassed by these comments, so decided to switch places with his father. Now father rode donkey and son started walking alongside donkey. Soon they passed another group of bystanders. One Woman exclaimed -” Shame on that lazy man to let his poor little son trudge along in this scorching hot day.” These comments made father upset, so he asked his son to sit along with him on the donkey.As they both rode little further, they passed another group of people. Now one bystander pointed out to the father and said - “ Aren't you ashamed of yourself and your hulking son, you have no consideration for this poor mute animal. Cruel merciless scoundrels you are”. Man and son felt very humiliated and decided that only way to avoid this criticism is that they both walk alongside donkey. But as they moved little further, they heard loud laughter’s. “Look at these fools. They have a donkey but none of them is riding on it. Never seen such stupid idiots."

Whatever the father and son did, they were always criticized and made fun of.

Public opinion is very fragile as it is guided by their limited view. Whatever one do, people will always talk. In the constant desire to seek others approvals, one often forgets to listen to their inner voice. Seeking approval of one's conscience and acting in accordance with it, should be most important. I think our mantra should be - “Suno sabki karo apne mann ki” i.e. Listen to everybody but do what your conscience says is correct.

Why are few people more luckier than others?

2014-08-09T21:36:00.000+05:30

For a long time, I have been wondering why some people are consistently lucky whilst others encounter little or no luck. Is luck some magical force or just the result of random chance? Are few people born under lucky stars or are our thoughts and behaviour responsible for much of the fortune?

People have long recognized the ability of fortune in transforming lives. They have always been searching for an effective way of improving the good fortune in their lives. Lucky charms, amulets, and talismans have been found virtually in all civilizations throughout the recorded history. Our obsession with astrology, numerology, Zodiac, Vastu have all been an exercise to enhance the good fortune in our lives.Superstition is the manifestation of this obsession. It represents people’s attempts to control and enhance this most elusive of factors. Some of the most important determinants of life's paths often arises through the most trivial of circumstances.In short, Goddess Fortuna and her wheel of fortune exerts dramatic influence over our lives. It has the power to transform the improbable into the possible, failure into success and grief into happiness.

So is luck just an external factor out of our control? Well, I believe we can really enhance our chances of being lucky by altering our behaviour and thought. I think lucky people are skilled at creating and noticing opportunities. They make lucky decisions by listening to their intuitions. They have a positive outlook towards life and view glass as half full rather than half empty. This optimistic and positive attitude helps them transform bad luck into good.

Lets take the case of opportunities. It is believed that lucky people consistently stumble upon opportunities whereas unlucky people do not. For example, i went out for a play with one of my friends who is perceived to be lucky. At the reception of the theatre, some company's PR agent asked us to fill a feedback form and lucky draw winners would get a gift hamper. He filled the form and i didn't, thinking why waste time and there is no chance, we'll win. Guess what? he won the lucky draw. So should I label him lucky and myself unlucky or was his openness to the idea of winning, responsible for him actually winning the hampers. This is a mild example, but there are several other occasions where I have seen that his idea of being open to possibilities has helped him to be what we call “lucky”.

I think unlucky people miss opportunities because they are too focused on looking for something specific. Sometimes a opportunity is staring at them but they miss it because they are busy looking for something else. Unlucky people goes out with preconceived notions. They go to parties with the intent on finding their perfect partner and so miss opportunities to make good friends.Lucky people are more relaxed and open, and therefore they see what is there rather than just what they are looking for. By this open attitude, they introduce themselves to the potential for new opportunities.

But a lucky life is not just about creating and noticing opportunities. It is also about the way we reflect on our life. A popular example among psychologist illustrating this is that of Olympic medallist. Who among the silver or bronze medallist should be more happy? Logic says that since silver medal is better than bronze medal so silver medallist should feel more happy. But on the contrary, it is observed that bronze medallist feels more satisfaction. The silver medallists focuses on the notion that if they had performed slightly better, then they would have perhaps won a gold medal. In contrast, the bronze medallists focus on the thought that if they had performed slightly worse, then they wouldn’t have won anything at all. This ability to imagine what might have happened, rather than what actually did happen is very crucial to the idea of feeling lucky in life.

Lucky people have the ability to imagine spontaneously how the bad luck they encountered could have been even worse and, by doing so, they feel much better about themselves and their lives. This helps them to stay positive and optimistic about their life and increases the likelihood of them continuing to live a lucky life.

Note: - Few ideas have been taken from Richard Wiseman's “The Luck Factor”. Here I am not discussing extreme circumstances, where luck can play a huge factor.

Nehru - Hero of his age and outcaste of ours

2012-06-23T19:19:00.001+05:30

As described by well know historian Dr. Ramachandra Guha “Nehru was the hero of his age who has become kind of outcaste in ours. No man has been so greatly revered in his lifetime, and so viciously vilified since his death.” Somehow I think time has eroded his achievements and magnified his failure. There has been so much vicious and unfair criticism of Nehru in recent times that I thought of writing this blog to make people of my generation aware of Nehru's contributions in building of our nation. I think biggest contributor to the decline of Nehru's reputation has been misrule of his next generations (primarily his daughter Indra Gandhi) and his socialist tendencies.

No political leader in the history had a more herculean task set up for him. He had to unite a country which was culturally, ethnically, religiously and linguistically divided. He had to unite a country which was fresh from partition on religious lines and saw bloodshed and riots. He had to protect country from becoming Hindu-Pakistan. Only Nehru was capable of doing this impossible task as he was equally respected by Hindus and Muslims, men and women and North Indians and South Indians. He laid a strong foundation for a secular India, promoted a plural ethos and was principal proponent of linguistic freedom of the nation. His work for social reforms like criminalizing caste discrimination, Hindu personal laws which ensured equal rights to women and abolishing zamidari against lots of opposition from outside and within his party laid strong foundation for modern nation.

Nehru was also the architect of parliamentary democracy. After the death of Gandhi and Patel by 1950, Nehru was the uncrowned king. If he wanted he could have easily gone the other way (i.e. autocracy or dictatorship) like most of the heroes of other nationalist movements did. He could have used any of reasons like partition, riots or so much division in country based on caste, language, religion etc as an excuse. But he believed that institutions are greater than individuals and worked towards making them strong. He was a true democrat. Once when asked what would be his legacy, he replied hopefully, 400 million people capable of governing themselves."

Nehru believed that science was required to solve the economic problems of a developing society like ours and to make it a strong and self-reliant country it needs scientists competent to hold their own in the world scientific community. He said, “It is science alone that can solve the problems of hunger and poverty, of insanitation and illiteracy, of superstition and deadening custom and tradition, of vast resources running to waste, of a rich country inhabited by starving people. . . . Who indeed could afford to ignore science today? At every turn we have to seek its aid.” Under his guidance institutes of scientific excellence like ISRO, CSIR, ICMR, DRDO were created. Under his vision world class institutes of higher education like IITs, AIIMs, IIMs and NITs were created. He also oversaw creation of thousands of govt. schools and launched initiatives such as the provision of free milk and meals to children in order to fight malnutrition and get higher student enrollment. While many of us celebrate Indian IT revolution and its large pool of managerial and scientific manpower which is earning accolades world wide., we should not forget that it was Nehru’s vision which build the foundation for this Knowledge-based Economy which we all are celebrating today and bearing fruits from.

Nehru was also architect of NAM. He gave India standing in world affairs disproportionate of its economic and military power. Some people criticize him for not taking one side (USSR or US) and reaping benefits from that position but Nehru didn’t speak for naked self interest he rather spoke for larger interest of humanity. He was a principled man after all.

People also criticize Nehru for his socialistic intentions and mixed economic policies. But one needs to look it in perspective. Unlike European and American society where capitalism is viewed as freedom, in India it was viewed as slavery (historical factor i.e. East India company came to trade and enslaved us). Thus he wanted no foreigner to control resources in India and had state led industrialization which was the call of the hour in 50’s. I agree that in subsequent years India should have liberalized but total blame for not doing that can’t be bestowed on Nehru only.

Yes I agree Nehru can be blamed for soft foreign policy towards China which led to India’s defeat in 1962 Indo-Sino war. He can also be blamed for Kashmir issue over which India has fought 3 wars with it’s neighbor since independence. But I think if we look in totality then his contribution in shaping modern India cannot be undermined. Nehru was a great visionary who single-handedly fashioned India into a forward-looking, modern, secular, liberal democratic state.

India’s Growth Story … Is India really shining?

2012-03-27T01:33:00.005+05:30

In Human Development Index (HDI), which looks beyond GDP to a broader definition of well-being, India ranks 134 among 187 countries. We rank below Nations like Bolivia, Guatemala, El Salvador which saw civil wars and are often deemed as poorest nations. Nation like Cuba which has zero billionaires, a nation which has faced a huge economic blockade since its birth, ranks 73 places ahead of us at 51. None of these nations have an annual average GDP growth of 7.9%. None of these nations aspire to be economic super power. None of these nations have human resource with technical and scientific capabilities like ours. In short, even nations much poorer than us have done a lot better than we have.

48% of India's children under the age of 5 are chronically malnourished due to poor diet and lack of nutrients in their food. We are home to the largest number of malnourished children in the world. India stands 67th out of 81 countries ranked in the Global Hunger Index. Our figure of Children malnourishment makes figures of sub-Saharan Africa look good.

At the time India got its Constitution, over 45% of people were officially below poverty line. According to latest poverty estimates, the proportion of people below poverty line are down to 37% (Taking estimate of Tendulkar committee, Arjun Sen Gupta committee suggested this figure to be 77%) , whereas, Gross domestic product (GDP) has quantum-leaped by over 500 times in the same period. Yes I agree that our nation has prospered in recent times but that prosperity has been limited to only few. The thing which has grown fasted in last 20 years is not IT but inequality.

I think it's time we start thinking about development and not mere growth. So often we use these worlds interchangeably. Growth is quantitative, whereas development is qualitative in nature. Growth is just ‘getting bigger’, whereas development is improvement. Do we really want to be a nation where 70% of population doesn’t matter? If we don’t start addressing this issue seriously then we run risk of political instability because political equality is unsustainable without social and economic inequalities. The spread of Naxalism is an indication of this phenomenon.

Note: - HDI was devised with collaborative effort of Pakistani economist Mahbub ul Haq and Indian economist Amartya Sen.

Micro Review of 84th Oscar Best Movie Nominees

2012-02-18T14:15:00.003+05:30

With Oscar Awards just a week away I thought of sharing my views on these years Best Movie Nominees. In this Era of Micro-Blogging and diminishing Attention Span I have tried to keep my reviews to 2-3 Lines.

War horse is an emotional drama that moves its audience with Spielberg's customary flair.It is Beautifully shot epic movie with splendid background score.It is a joyous, uplifting and sentimental film.It's a worthwhile experience which reminds one of Black Beauty and Saving Private Ryan.Rating-7/10.

The Descendants is a meaningful, Intelligent ,dramatic film about a guy who is coping with a dying, unfaithful wife and understanding the nuances of parenthood. It's an emotional roller coaster ride which is highly recommended. Rating-8/10 …

Moneyball is a smart, intense biographical film about how Billy Beane (General manager of Oakland Athletic Baseball team) assembles a competitive team with a payroll that is a mere fraction of that of league Giants like New York Yankees. It’s a movie about the war between intuition and statistics.Rating-7.5/10.

The Help is an entertaining, touching, involving and wonderfully acted movie set during Civil Rights era in America in the early 1960s. It is a tale told from point of black maids who raises little white girls with great love and care but these little girls inexorably turns into their mothers and mistreats them( with rare exceptions). Rating-7/10

The Tree of Life is one of the most ambitious films ever made which tries to understand meaning of life. It has scenes from beginning of universe to its end. It is an emotional as well as visual treat. It is a metaphysical, psychological and spiritual inquiry into mankind’s place in this universe. It is one of those movies which even after watching multiple times is difficult to comprehend. Highly Recommended Rating- 8/10

Midnight in Paris is romantic comedy fantasy film directed by Woody Allen, who I consider is a treasure to cinema. This film is about a universal belief that if we lived in particular Golden Age, life would be so much simpler and fun. It is a love letter to Paris. Rating- 7/10

Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close is a story about a precocious boy trying to reconcile with the death of his father in 9/11 while finding the lock that matches a mysterious key left behind by his father. This movie is emotionally draining and has lots of implausible elements in its story which at times makes it difficult to watch. Rating – 6/10

The Artist is a charming, delightful movie with drama, comedy, action and romance gorgeously intertwined. It reminds one of great movies like Kagaaz ke Phool, Singin in the Rain and Sunset Blvd. It is a love letter to silent cinema. It is an experience that shouldn’t be missed. Rating – 8/10

Hugo: I am yet to see this film. It is releasing on 16th March in India.

Problem of plenty … Why having more choices is not always good?

2012-01-22T22:16:00.002+05:30

In today’s world, there is an explosion of choices. We have more choices than ever before. But are we better of with so many choices? Well on surface it looks quite logical that more choices are always good. But recent research strongly suggests that, psychologically, this assumption is wrong. Although having some choice is undoubtedly better than none but more is not always better than less.

When people are faced with having to choose one option out of many desirable choices, they begin to consider hypothetical trade-offs. They begin searching for the most ideal option. They evaluate options in terms of missed opportunities instead of the opportunity's potential. They become compulsive comparers. The sense of lose is caused due to having let go other opportunities. One of the costs of making a selection is losing the opportunities that a different option would have afforded. This leads to anxiety and sometimes opportunity costs may create enough conflict to produce paralysis i.e. one chooses to not chose at all. People start deferring there decisions because of fear of anticipated regret i.e. what if they chose less desirable alternative.

Even if one is able to chose, the satisfaction out of that choice suffers. One may do well objectively but feels worse. Losing opportunity of the good parts of other options make even good choices look less good. Unchosen possibilities linger forever. Feeling of regret also creeps. You start blaming yourself for not choosing the most appropriate option. When there are so many options, chances increase that a really good one is out there, and you feel that you ought to have been able to find it. It’s easy to imagine a better alternative. End result is under appreciation and self blame. But when there are limited number of options what one really does is he blames the world and there is blame-sharing which leads to no regret.

So what does all this mean? Does it mean that we would all be better of if our choices were severely restricted, even eliminated? I do not think so. The relation between choice and well-being is very complicated. Some choices is better is than none but there is some magical number (which I do not know) after which additional choices starts showing negative effects.

Great Movies which one might have skipped

2012-01-21T01:14:00.005+05:30

Below mentioned are two brilliant pieces of cinema which one might have skipped. The connecting link between these two master pieces is their brilliant story and dialogues. These two movies highlight what a great team of writers can achieve, a phenomenon which is lately strangely missing in Hindi Film Industry. Ismat Chughtai, one of the finest Urdu writer of last century, is story writer of Garam Hawa and dialogue writer of Junoon. She lived her life in midst controversy. Some people labeled her obscene and after the publication of her story ‘Lihaf’ in 1942 (which had lesbianism theme); she was even trialled at Lahore court. For me she was a brilliant writer who portrayed middle class society and its concerns with vivid and masterful realism. She was brave, passionate and committed to truth. These two movies also had contributions of other Ace writer like Satyadev Dubey, Kaifi Azmi and Ruskin Bond. These movies are also reminder of what’s missing in contemporary cinema, why does it appear so shallow and soul less. I think after watching these two movies you’ll find your answer …

Garam Hawa (1973) - Based on an unpublished story by famous Urdu writer Ismat Chugtai, is one of the few movies dealing with state of Muslims who stayed back in India post partition. This film captures the struggle and anguish of the Muslim people who found themselves in strange situation where they in their own country were treated as outsiders. Salim Mirza, played brilliantly by Balraj Sahani, is one such Muslim who stays back in India. He with his family has to fight to find their identity and respect in this new country with changed realities. He can only watch as his world is slowly ripped by tragic aftermath of partition. Sikandar, played by Farooq Shaikh, is Salim Mirza's unemployed son who is often on his face told that he might have a better chance in Pakistan. The fabulous story, great performances (especially of Balraj Sahani) and the sensitivity of the content makes it a must watch. Garam Hawa was initially banned but eventually it won a national award for national integration and was even screened in Pakistan.

Complete Film :-

Junoon (1978) : - Adapted from Ruskin Bond's novel, Flight of the Pigeons, is a story about a Pathan, Javed Khan (played by Shashi Kapoor), who is an imposing, proud man rendered feeble by his obsession. The movie is set in the 1857 mutiny where amidst all the bloodshed and atrocities, the only thing Javed Khan can think of is Ruth Labadoor, played by Nafisa Ali(although he is married to Firdaus, played by Shabana Azmi). It shows the tussle between Javed’s obsession and pride. On one hand he wants Ruth but on another his nobility doesn’t allows him to use force. Ruth’s mother Miriam is unrelenting, eventually; the two strike a peculiar, yet greatly symbolic bargain “Dilli apki toh Ruth bhi aapki”. Director Shyam Benegal, assisted by ace co-writers (dialogue by Satyadev Dubey and Ismat Chugtai), created overwhelmingly powerful film. Junoon is a beautiful, sad and compelling film.

Complete film :-

Modern Times - Quality v/s Quantity

2011-12-02T19:08:00.000+05:30

In modern times, Stress is on rise. Everywhere whether in media, at work or at home we hear discussions about stress and stress management. It is a major topic of discussion as we speed through our hectic days. Demanding work , compulsions to achieve goals, fast paced city life, intense competition, long working hrs, no job security, long travelling hrs, technological changes (keeping pace with learning new things), working mothers/spouses, nuclear families are few of aspects of modern life style which is taking its toll on us.

From Human Beings, we are fast becoming Human doings. Everyone seems to have far too many tasks they want to accomplish.We hardly think about pacing ourselves better. While it is true that we are now living longer than we ever have, but are we living better, healthier than before? Do we have better quality of life? Or is it just quality v/s quantity?

In this new age of abundant possibilities, many of us go limp from indecision. With so many options at our disposal, we often wonder whether the path we are taking is the most appropriate path. We can’t help ourselves from wondering questions like “Is this really what I want?” ”Will it lead to optimum utilization of my skill?”,”Is this what I love doing?" Certainty becomes very difficult to achieve. Unchosen possibilities linger forever. We become compulsive comparers – Always wondering if we should have taken that path (which others are treading). Always thinking that others are much luckier than we are. All this leads to anxiety. One spends all his time contemplating the options and deferring any action. What is the way out?

I think the best way to tackle anxiety or stress is to develop an attitude of accepting things that we can’t change, giving our best to do things we can change and foster wisdom to know the difference. Keeping things in perspective is also very vital for example sometimes when we get late for work, we usually hurry on road without realizing that it will hardly matter if we are 5 minutes late, but what is at stake is huge(our lives). Then having good sense of humour, being positive, establishing a network of social support , having healthy lifestyle, cultivating hobbies, making time for recreation, keeping yourself engaged(maybe volunteering), expressing gratitude, giving/sharing freely, practising detachment, not being self opinionated, being carefree not careless, living in present, discussing problems, keeping a pet(if one likes). All these can help one in keeping free from stress and anxiety. We should also remember that practising stress free life style is an incremental process we should slowly and gradually start inculcating these habits in your lifestyle and see the difference.

Harsh Reality of Bollywood

2011-11-17T20:35:00.000+05:30

With hardly a month and a half left in 2011, I am finding it difficult to make a list of my top ten favorite Hindi movies. If we look at the market it has been a landmark year for Hindi Film Industry with 4 new entries (BodyGuard,Ready,RaONe and Singham) in elite 100 crore club taking overall count to 8 and at least one more(Don 2) shall join the club. Bodyguard completed this feat in one week itself. Trade gurus like Taran Adarsh are often observed celebrating the fact that movies after movies which are slammed by critics are doing well at box-office. It is the box-office success that matters. They argue that people love these so called entertaining movies with all the latkas and jhattas …. Anything crude, mindless, unoriginal, derivative and mediocre is sold by terming it as Commercial Entertaining Movie. And anything little cerebral is termed Parallel or art cinema. Contradiction between art cinema and commercial films shouldn’t exist.

If Italians invented realism in cinema, the Germans expressionism, the French new wave, what have we invented? Bollywood? With hundreds of its movies being direct imitation of Hollywood movies .Innumerable websites give graphic details of this plagiaristic orgy, listing film after films which have borrowed from foreign films without acknowledgement. …. True that the industry has to keep commercial consideration in mind, but so does film industry around the world. The industry which makes maximum movies in the world is viewed as a plethora of songs and dances, where people are running around trees singing and dancing in colorful clothes expressing their love for each other in a dreamy location. Why have the standard of one of the oldest and most prolific film industry fallen to this extent? Why don’t our producers, directors and writers feel free to imagine and write original meaningful stories? Why do they follow such short cuts i.e. making formula films or borrow from successful Hollywood movies? Why do they devalue their creative skill so much?

Yes there are few exceptions to this … But most of it falls under the label of parallel cinema … Very few mainstream movies attempt to tell meaning full stories …. If we look at past 3 years there is a handful of genuinely good mainstream bollywood movies …The rising costs involved in film production and the commercialization of the films (i.e. spending huge money in marketing and promotion of movies.... creating huge hype around the movie by occupying lots of media space … occupying most of the screens and thus making it inevitable for people to watch anything apart from their movies ….) is having a negative impact on the art films. Underworld financing and piracy is also proving to be fatal threat to offbeat movies. I have no objection with the crappy mainstream bollywood movies. But what I want is that there should be a space for directors, actors and movie makers who want to make meaning full cinema , for whom cinema is much more than a mere medium of entertainment to Co-Exist …..

Art of feeling Empowered

2011-07-21T21:12:00.000+05:30

Depression, anxiety and stress is on rise. Its fast becoming part and parcel of modern life style. I sometimes can’t help myself from wondering why inspite of living better life than our previous generations (comfort wise), we are always whining about things? We all are in some kind of rat race and are endlessly chasing things, which we ourselves don’t really know, but we are chasing them because we don’t want to be left behind in the race. Our inability of being in control of our lives also adds to this anxiety and stress. One doesn't realize that there are many forces at work and not all are under our control. Smart way is to fix inside rather than trying to fix outside.One should focus on changing one’s attitude and perception.
Let me tell you a story. Once a man was walking, he met a person and enquired, what he was doing? The man replied rudely, can’t you see I am cutting stones. He moved little further and asked another man what he was doing? He replied dispassionately and gloomily that he is trying to earn a square meal for his family by doing whatever work is given to him. He walked little further and asked another man what he was doing? He replied with great zeal and enthusiasm that he was building a magnificent and splendid temple. All these three men were doing the same thing but what determined the excitement and satisfaction they drew from their work was their perception i.e. the context in which they view their work.
Appreciation is a critical part of being happy and feeling fulfilled. We need to change our outlook. There are many external factors which influence our lives. These factors are beyond our control. Gita also highlights this through the concept of Karma and Gyan Yogi. According to it, Karma is in one’s hand and not its fruit, so one shouldn't lament over the results. Karma is how one reacts to their environment. Once one realize that there are many forces at work, not all of which are under one's control then he stops blundering through life and feels empowered. Such person is called Gyan Yogi. Quality of life depends more on the intentional activities i.e. cognitive, behavioural and conscious activities which one choose to do rather than the circumstances and situation one face.

Gulzar ... epitome of a best father that anyone could ever have .....

2011-07-01T17:23:00.000+05:30

Just finished reading biography of Gulzar ‘Because he is ….’ written by his daughter Meghna Gulzar or Bosky(name of Chinese silk) as he calls her ….Gulzar as described by his wife Rakhee 'Agar aap shayar na hote to bade hi ordinary hote' …. And I couldn’t agree more ….. If one look at his work of art, one will notice his simplicity, serenity, subtlety, poise and elegance …. Sensitive depiction of interpersonal relationships has always been his trademark and strength ….. But what left me completely mesmerized was the bonding, which he shares with his daughter …. The way he brought her up is quite remarkable and every parent should read this book …. His understanding of child psyche is also evident in his movie ‘Kitaab’ ….. Gulzar is indeed an epitome of a best father that anyone could ever have ….

Here are few lines from his book Pukhraaj :-

na-na,rehne do,mat mitao inhe

in lakeeron ko yun hi rehne do

nanhe-nanhe gulaabi haaton se

mere maasoom nanhe bacche ne

tedhi-medhi lakeeren kheenchi hain

kya hua 'shakl' ban saki na agar

mere bacche ke haath hain inme

meri pehchaan hai lakeeron mein

Vanity in E=mc^2

2011-06-18T22:51:00.000+05:30

Last week while browsing through net and collecting information about depression, I stumbled on a survey released by University Health Services (UHS), according to which 80% Harvard students are depressed at sometime during their study at Harvard, Forty-seven percent felt so depressed that it was difficult for them to function and almost 10 percent of undergraduates reported that they had considered committing suicide. At first I was little suspicious of the survey, I investigated further and to my surprise found that this trend was true in all top colleges. In fact the higher your college is rated the higher is stress level among students.
I was shocked, why would the most successful individuals on earth with whom most of us would without hesitation exchange places, consider suicide as an option? I started searching for reasons. I found lots of probable reasons like greater academic demands, peer pressure, competition for jobs and scholarships, separation from family and adjustments to becoming independent. But the root cause for this problem was missing everywhere, which according to me is the tendency of human being of measuring everything by looking at it relatively. From being among 1% throughout there life, 99% of them are now not in top 1%. This feeling of not doing well with respect to your peer group leads to huge dissatisfaction and this feeling is universal.Society also plays an important role by always drawing comprasions among individuals rather than embracing one's individuality. According to me one probable reason for its universality lies in our evolutionary past and can be explained by Darwinian Theory.
But sometimes it’s necessary to view one's life as half full rather than half empty and look at all the achievements one has had in their life and draw satisfaction from it .One should realize that all individuals are unique and have different qualities and needs. If we fall in this vicious cycle of comparative view of oneself then we’ll always find ourselves dissatisfied and chasing things rather than understanding our uniqueness and doing things which gives us satisfaction.

Mystery called Happiness

2011-06-04T12:21:00.000+05:30

What is the purpose of life? To be happy ... I think that all our efforts whether it’s loving somebody, doing well professionally or philanthropic gestures are all done to derive happiness..... But then why is it that even after slogging to make our future selves happy it mostly remains unhappy??? I think it's because our future selves won't see the world the way we see it now..... While imagining future we prefeels events and think that we'll feel the same when we get there but it isn’t true ... Like any other lens our experiences will become part of the lens through which we view the world and distort what we see....

So then what does this mean??? That one should stop thinking about future and shouldn’t work towards achieving things that they think will make them happy..... Well I am not suggesting that.... What i am asking is to re-calculate your future goal in the light of today's happiness …. We should not forget that journey—is equally important, if not more so, than the destination …. "One cannot divine or forecast the conditions that will make happiness; one only stumbles upon them by chance, in a lucky hour, at the world's end somewhere, and holds fast to the days, as to fortune or fame" - Daniel Gilbert

But still there are few things which have been found to provide long term happiness like meaningful closely connected relationships and social bonds, showing gratitude, philanthropic gestures, simplifying and doing one task at a time rather than multi-tasking, finding and utilizing one’s strength and having a healthy life style i.e. Proper sleep, nutritious food, regular exercise etc. Material things and possessions also provide happiness but that happiness is temporary. Wonderful things are especially wonderful the first time they happen, but their wonderfulness wanes with repetition. Psychologist calls it habituation; economist calls it declining marginal utility. To beat habituation one can either increase the variety of one's experiences or increase the amount of time that separates repetitions of the experiences.

Note: - Few ideas have been taken from Daniel Gilbert’s “Stumbling on Happiness” …..

Chetan Bhagat's contribution 2 literally circle

2009-07-06T11:27:00.001+05:30

Thanks to Google and Chetan Bhagat who have revolutionized whole literally circle and have given us new generation of writers. Now writing is not confined with philosophers and scholars, even people like me who has no experience in writing or who is not that well read are starting to pen down there thoughts because now they have readers for there thoughts. People publish their ideas on blogs and even are starting to write books. Due to great success of books like 'Five point someone’,’ One night @ call,’ Anything for you ma'am','Of course I love You....Till I Find Someone Better' and many more which have sold over million copies, now even publishers are willing to give these young new inexperienced writers chance to publish there work. We now have whole new generation of readers and writers who appreciate these works. Although many people in literally circle criticizes Chetan's work and call it masala.But for me he has brought people especially young generation back to reading, now people who hated books are developing reading habits. I see people around me posting their ideas on blog and once they are in this writing mode they are even attempting to write books.

Trip to mussoorie.........

2008-05-29T12:26:00.000+05:30

This Sunday my cousin and his friends came to our place, they wanted to visit mussoorie. There was bright blazing sun in dehradun. Summers was at it’s peak. It was scorching hot. But as we moved up the hill to mussoorie weather started getting cooler, well this is what attracts tourists to mussoorie. It was a fascinating experience.
Finally we arrived at kempty fall, the most popular picnic spot in mussoorie. It was jam packed we were not getting place to park our car. It took around 30 minutes to get our car parked. We made our way through shops to kempty fall, it was very crowded, there was hardly any space left. Place was littered. People were eating and throwing left over whereever they like. I felt sorry looking at this behaviour. My father exclaimed that people were ruining the natural beauty of this place. He narrated me how beautiful and fascinating this place used to be when he was a kid,but now it has been ruined.People only wants to mint money and nobody is concerned about damage done to flora and fauna. My cousin and his friends were very thrilled as they had never seen such a beautiful place.They jumped into the water and enjoyed.But i was very sad and wanted to leave the place as soon as possible.
It started pouring so we decided to go back to Doon, through mall road,the spin of mussoorie. But here too, I was disappointed seeing shops popped out everywhere. I wondered is this really that place which people call the “Queen of hills” or about which Jawaharlal Nehru and Dalai Lama had said wonderful things .I was very saddened by my visit and wondered this is why Britishers didn’t allowed Indians to enter mall road.
While returning , my father suggested to see one more picnic spot called “Robber’s Cave”. So we went to this place.Earlier roads to this place where broken and it was quite difficult to go to this place.But now i was thrillled to see new roads ,we drove down to Robber’s Cave. There was no problem in parking car, there were very few tourists and most importantly natural beauty was intact. We entered the cave with water flowing through our legs and took pictures of the beautiful landscape around. We were very delighted .Finally we got to see the natural beauty which probably attracted Jawaharlal Nehru to dehradun that’s why he used to stay in circuit house near by.
But when we returned from the cave we were caught by press reporter,near tea stall he asked us about our experience. I asked him“what the matter is?”He told that government is planning to develop this place as a picnic spot.I grew sad,you'll be wondering why was i sad,eventually this will attact more tourists and will lead to development of my place.
Well I was thinking that after the development of this place to a picnic spot,it too will be destroyed and ruined.I was left with one thought that I too will become like my dad.When i'll come with my children to this place, i'll tell them tales about how beautiful this place used to be.

Immature Love........

2008-05-28T13:59:00.001+05:30

Two great mysteries dominate our lives, Love and money. We generally get the impression of love from books, movies and songs. But the question is do we really understand love? And answer is no…… nobody can understand what love is…..It defies all analysis. Why two persons fall in attraction and become inseparable is a mystery. Very contrasting personalities may love each other for all the life and very similar partner may fall out of love in a short time. It is the very nature of love that makes it a subject of so much investigation. Let’s try and investigate one question …. Why love marriages are more susceptible to failures?

Romantic movies, songs and books are full of fascinating and wonderful ideas about love. They make us feel that love is the greatest source of happiness and ones life is incomplete without love .Thus everyone want to fall in love. The first person whom you meet, who has similar preferences, likes and dislikes, is little attractive and is interested in you ...... you start fitting them into your imagination of your Mr. /Miss perfect......thus we see most young people falling in love with the first person interested in them and who have similar preferences (well you can't start spending time with first person interested in you if they are not of your type)........ Other person also tries to do justice to the role given to them, well they too has developed their fantasies from movies and books..... and when it's matter of few hours you can put yourself into any role......these young people without having any implications of real life, commits to there partners.....but when they have to face real world where there is nothing like what is potrayed in sweet romantic movies, they find it very difficult to adjust ...... now it’s time to take up responsibilities …. Life seems lot less fun ….. They vent out their frustrations on each other ….have frequent quarrels......social and parental compulsions are low.....expectation levels are quite high.....and ultimately marriage falls apart......

On the contrary, in arrange marriages we enter with a notion of making adjustments, we are ready to accept the other person as they are......and as far as real life implications are concerned, they are taken care of by our parents (who have lots of experience, and friends experience is the greatest teacher)......further the young lads are certainly more matured now and they too have a lot more understanding of real life responsibilities...........thus arranged marriages has more chances of succeeding ……

So mathematically we can sum this as .....

Love Marriage= Arranged Marriage + (love/infatuation) - Compulsions + loads of expectation

But ultimately everything depends on individuals.......... Because it’s not that all love marriages fails and all arranged marriages are successful or vice-versa ….

I have nothing against love marriages..............in fact I myself want to fall in love and have a happy and successful love marriage....but friends don't fall prey to this immature love..........and always remember that

"IT'S VERY DIFFICULT TO WAIT FOR RIGHT PERSON, ESPECIALLY WHEN WRONG PERSONS ARE SOO CUTE"

Subprime Crisis

2008-05-26T16:49:00.000+05:30

Subprime Crisis is an on going economic problem,primarily in USA.This crisis began with the bursting of US housing bubble and high subprime lending rates in late 2006.
In US,the banks give loans at a higher rate than prime rates, to the high risk borrowers with lower income and less credit history.this type of lending is called sub prime lending.This sub prime lending can be in the form of house loans, car loans or credit cards.sub prime enabled lower income borrowers to buy houses and spend more money.People started buying houses,cars and other luxury goods on loans.Due to this, the prices of houses in US increased by leaps and bounds.People started looking at real estate as a good investing option and invested money in it borrowed on loan.We all are aware of gready nature of man.
BUt in lkate 2006,this bubble burst.Their was a huge decline in real estate prices ,as much as, 50% in some regions.Moreover, the rate of unemployment also increase in US(thanks in India and China).People realised that they had spend more than they actually had.Now, this group of high risk borrowers found themselves unable to return loans.They declared themselves bankrupt.A large number of US household properties were subjected to some sort of foreclosure action.As much as $1.3 trillion were lend by banks as subprime mortgages.Now,since the prices of real estate declined,so banks had to suffer huge losses.As much as $300 billion loss was reported by various financial institutions till april,2008.
The widespread credit risk and its unclear effect on financial institutions caused lenders to reduce the lending activities and thus they raised the interest rates,which caused the shortage of liquid money in the system.This is called credit crunch.Corporations found it difficult to fund themselves.
There started a decrease in consumption by people in US.They were spending less; which led to the decrease in demand of goods.Emerging economies like India and China,who were exporting goods and providing services to people in US also suffered a setback,as demand decreased.There started financial crisis in Us,whole economy got a hit.Even other economies suffered a setback.
Finally,the US Federal bank and Us government had to intervine.US Federal bank decreased interest rates and funded funded member banks to ensure that they have access money to keep liquidity in the system. President Bush signed an economic stimulus package of$168 billion,mainly in form of income tax rebates,to help stimulate economic growth.All these measures are showing its effect and US economy is slowly recovering from sub prime crisis.

liers

2008-05-26T05:34:00.000+05:30

Today i'll share a part of my experiences and observations .......try to get the message and always keep this in mind as it'll prove very fruitful for your entire life......it's about lie n liers......world is full of glib and pathogenic liars,they not only distort facts but also are very smooth while telling it .......it's perhaps because........when they were children, their parents and relatives overlook it ,this is not because they didn't get it but it's because they didn't want their child to lose confidence,but child is unaware of this reality and thinks that he got away with it and keeps on speaking lies......when he grows older his good friends also overlooks his lies as they don't want to make him feel embarrassed but poor child is again unaware of this fact and continues with his lying.....but when he faces the real world where there are no friends or relatives, poor child continues on with his habbit to which he has now become slave ....and he is here set right by the world.....so my message here is not that you stop lying but is that you continue with it as it's a very useful tool to have in your kitty...but be aware of these realities and don't fall victim of mirage that you'll escape anything you speak..... remain selective while choosing the person in front of whom you lie.....otherwise you are bound to face lots of trouble in your professional life as world and your collegues are not your friends or relatives.....