Faith Barista

Walking Through The Doorway of Known

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 07:05:06 +0000

I don’t know them.

I’ve said hi a few times. I’ve stood in the quad after church with coffee in hand, trying to politely tell my kids “just one blueberry muffin!”

I met Julie the first Sunday I visited at the church’s welcome table. Lynn, I met at a newcomer’s dinner last month. She smiled, asked me where I’m from, whether I was new in town. The third girl Nicole sat in the row behind me before worship service. I turned to notice she and her husband were flanked by two girls, one around TJ’s age. A mommy-comrade-in-arms, I noted to self.

Sure, I know their names, how many kids they have, where about town they live and how long they’ve been going to church.

But, I don’t really know them.

You see, I’m new at my church.

And in many ways, as hard it is to look for a new community of believers to do life with and worship together – it can also be very easy to be new.

It is very easy to just lay low.

To be quiet.

To be safe.

To just smile and remain unknown.

To keep every interaction from leading to the one door you don’t want to walk through…

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…To read the rest of the story – click here to join me over at DaySpring’s (in)courage site, where today’s post is published.

Take a virtual coffee break together and share your thoughts. I’ve turned off comments here, so we can all meet up there!

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** Don’t miss! ** If you are new to Faith Barista, I’d like welcome you here.Click to subscribe by email and get each post in this series served up hot and fresh directly in your mailbox.
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Torn Between My Heart and My Head

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 29 Mar 2012 07:05:53 +0000

Have you ever stayed up late, conflicted between your head and your heart? Sometimes the only way out of a dilemma is seeing God take you through the storm.

I love hiking. Even when it rains. Lightly.

It was my first visit out to Georgia, before the days of iPhones and instant weather reports.

Earlier in the morning, I watched the local news and had been warned there’d be showers on and off.

I’d been out in the rain before and wasn’t worried too much about it.

I drove out to a state park. But, as I parked my car, I realized I forgot my rain gear.

There I sat, trying to decide if I should chance it and go for my hike. Should I turn around and leave?

I had driven for over an hour. I decided I didn’t come all this way just to turn back.

I looked up at the sky. The sun was shining and it was early in the day.

I have my waterproof hiking boots on. And my baseball cap. I’ll be alright.

I set out for my trek up, deep into the woods.

An hour later — mid-point on the trail — it started sprinkling. Then, it poured — in sheets, coming down sideways.

I later found out the weather system up on that mountain is completely different from the one back in town.

Storm clouds moved in over the shade of the trees, darkening the sky. The winds began whirling and a clap of thunder cracked in my ears.

Lightning flashed and there I stood. Cold and wet — in the middle of a thunder storm — on a side of a mountain I had never journeyed through…

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…To read the rest of the story – click here to join me over at DaySpring’s (in)courage site, where today’s post is published.

Take a virtual coffee break together and share your thoughts. I’ve turned off comments here, so we can all meet up there!

Photo credit: “puddles” by bogflogger via Photobucket.

Break Out Of The Shell Of Rejection: Four Golden Rules of Fearless Living

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 07:05:51 +0000

“The choices are never easy.

We can nurse wounds of having been cheated in life, or we can be grateful and joyful, even though there seems to be little reason for it.

It is this power to choose that adds dignity to our humanity.”

~ Gerald Sittser, Professor of Christian Spirituality

The other day, someone asked me whether I was a Glass-Half-Full or Glass-Half-Empty type of person. I hadn’t been asked that in a while and stopped to think about it.

“Well… I used to totally see the glass half full when I was younger. Until I got burned living that way.

I became the glass-half-empty type. I started seeing how everything could go wrong, to protect myself against making mistakes.”

The funny thing is, life did seem to get better. I felt more in control. I took pride in successfully predicting how the chips would fall.

But, I noticed a side-affect of such “smart” living.
I started losing my edge. My faith edge.

I started disappearing in a shroud of avoiding rejection — whether it was relational or taking risks with new things.

Changes were subtle, but my consistent picks to stay safe yielded a life of predictability… creating a wall of people-pleasing, fearful calculations that made spontaneity and joy pretty scarce.

Thank God, my memories of the glass-half-full life came back to bug me every so often. In the form of… regrets.

The Greater Pain Of Regret

I hid myself from the possibility of pain so well, I reached a point where the pain of regret outgrew the pain of rejection.

I got it wrong. I will be burned regardless of how I saw the water in my glass. Rejection is a universal human experience.

The difference in living a fearless life versus a fearful life, however, was unmistakable.

One seeks out the good, while the other lives to control the bad.

The Four Golden Rules

Will I live creating a trail of regrets on what I coulda-woulda done?

Or will I choose to live, trying to be fearless, and actually do this thing called life?

I came up with The Four Golden Rules of Fearless Living and started coming out of my shell:

1. Choose the Harder Choice.

2. Keep It Real With Others.

3. Practice Seeing the Glass-Half-Full.

4. Pray For Courage To Make Mistakes.

These four pointers challenged me to keep my faith edges sharp.

Keep That Faith Edge Sharp

Each time we attempt one of the above, we are exercising faith.

We risk rejection for the opportunity to live true to the desires God’s placed in us.

We exercise choice, trusting that God’s plan for us is bigger than our mistakes.

It’s ultimately a question of whether we trust in God’s goodness.

Will He:

– Catch me when I fall?

– Replenish friends if I’m betrayed?

– Heal my broken bones if I’m hurt?

– Restock the storehouses if I’m robbed?

– Still bless me, when I make mistakes?

I’m not saying it’s easy, but man, consider the alternative.

Acquiescing to fear might seem easier. But, the cost to living less than the life God intended is also steeper than it appears.

I still get hurt, but I am learning to love my glass half-full.

Whenever I’m tempted to go back to the way I was, I return to the One who drank the cup that looked half empty one dark night.

He fills my cup every time.

If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it.
But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it.
~ Jesus, Luke 9:24

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Is your glass half full or half empty?

Which of the Four Fearless Rules is God nudging you to try?

Pull up a chair. I’d love hearing from you.Click to share a comment.

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*** NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — LINK UP IN THE FAITH JAM ***

Faith Barista Jam Thursdays – Every Thursday, I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post and link up.

Place the Faith Jam Badge in your post. It’s a welcome sign for our community. Grab the HTML Code. Thanks!

HTML Code For the Faith Jam Faith Fresh Badge

<a href="http://www.faithbarista.com/join-faith-barista-jam-thursdays/" target="blank"></a>

Share your post by clicking the blue button below: “Add Your Link”. (Subscribers: click here to get there directly).

*Today’s 3/8/12 Writing Prompt:* fearless.

*Next Faith Jam: TBD in April.I’m entering the final trimester to my first “book pregnancy”. It’s time for me to take a deep breath and focus my keystrokes to completing the manuscript. I’ll be taking a break from serving up faith prompts for our faith jam for a bit. Thanks for encouraging my heart through your posts, making my world warmer, less alone and filled with your stories, memories and as-is reflections. I’m looking forward to swapping stories again then!

Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real. Click here to learn more.

It’s a jam session. Say hi & drop a comment and make a faith friend when you visit the community faith blends!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
** Don't miss! ** If you are new to Faith Barista, I'd like welcome you here.Click to subscribe by email and get each post in this series served up hot and fresh directly in your mailbox.

Today's post is refreshed from the archives.

Why You Are Already Amazing – A Book Shower Gift for Holley Gerth

Bonnie Gray — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 07:05:16 +0000

“Why is it hard to receive what we need?… In order to receive, we have to open our hearts, hands and lives. We put ourselves in a position that’s vulnerable.” ~ Holley Gerth

Psst… I’m going to a surprise book shower today.

Yep, that’s right. My dear friend of mine — Holley Gerth — just released a beautiful book into the world this month, touching the hearts of women everywhere called: “You’re Already Amazing: Embracing Who You Are, Becoming All God Created You To Be”. As I turned each page, my heart opened up to the loving whispers of my Abba Father: “You’re already amazing.”

To celebrate with Holley, who labored long and hard to deliver words of encouragement to us, our friend Stephanie invited us to surprise Holley by sharing a post about a woman we think is #AlreadyAmazing.

Holley spends so much time and care crafting messages to let us know we’re already amazing in the Father’s eyes, I thought I’d let her know why she is already amazing, too!

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Holley's heart to heart message: You're Already Amazing

Dear Holley,

I still remember when I first met you, how we went out for ice cream and ended up talking in the dark, sitting in the parking lot — swapping stories of God-sized dreams, the questions and journey for more joy and more God. You already know in our Heavenly Father’s eyes you are already amazing. But, I wanted you to know I think you’re an #AlreadyAmazing woman too because –

* You’re beautiful. I love how your eyes light up when you’re excited about a new idea God’s given you — and how your heart is energized by empowering other sisters to cherish theirs too.

* You’re courageous. You open up your heart, changing the world by showing us how God is changing yours.

* You’re real. Talking with you makes my heart lighter, knowing I’m not the only one who forgets to put the coffee filter in the coffee maker. You turn insecurities into a weapon of God’s love and friendship: transparency.

* You’re creative. I love what you did with this book, inviting women everywhere to embrace who God’s called us to be. I had so much fun taking surveys, jotting notes and circling answers, like girlfriends staying up late at a slumber party — talking about what we like — and what we don’t.

* You’re a heart to heart friend. You’ve made receiving a spiritual blessing, being the ears and heart of God to me. You make the world a sunnier place by sitting out on the limb with me, with your laughter and prayers.

I love how you dare us to embrace all of who we are in this book, You’re Already Amazing, by sharing so honestly how you found yourself on this journey… and continue to share it with us now.

With love,

Bonnie

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Is there a woman in your life who is #AlreadyAmazing? Pull up a chair. Click to share a comment.

You can link up a post in honor of that woman over at Holley’s blog here. (Stephanie snuck in to surprise her with the link up!)

If you’re looking for a faith dare to be all God created you to be, pick up You’re Already Amazing. It’s a treat for your soul. You can also join Holley and walk through the book with the Bloom (in)courage Book Club. Each week, there will be a post to go with a chapter, a video with Holley, and ways the chat together about it.

The Day God Took My Picture

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 08 Mar 2012 08:05:26 +0000

Photo courtesy of Dawn Camp

I’m all grown up now, learning to put the past behind me and leave it there.

But, one day when I wasn’t suspecting, God took me back in time.

It happened one weekend I flew to South Carolina to meet up with the beautiful women I’d been writing alongside at (in)courage. Since becoming a new mom of two, I never had the chance to make trips outside of the home. Up until that point, I wrote from the privacy of my desk.

But when baby CJ turned two years old, I felt God was telling me it was time.

Take the next step, Bonnie. Go.

So, when DaySpring invited us to spend a beach retreat together at Hilton Head, I packed my bags with measured hopes for new beginnings.

Little did I know I’d connect with one of the women there, through a childhood hurt I thought was long forgotten.

It’s kind of embarrassing to say it. It’s probably not a big deal…but…

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Photo courtesy of Dawn Camp

…To read the rest of the story – click here to join me at my friend Dawn Camp’s faith and photography blog, where today’s post is published.

Take a virtual coffee break together and share your thoughts. I’ve turned off comments here, so we can all meet up there!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

* NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — LINK UP IN THE FAITH JAM *

Faith Barista Jam Thursdays – Every Thursday, I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post and link up.

Place the Faith Jam Badge in your post. It’s a welcome sign for our community. Grab the HTML Code. Thanks!

HTML Code For the Faith Jam Faith Fresh Badge

<a href="http://www.faithbarista.com/join-faith-barista-jam-thursdays/" target="blank"></a>

Share your post by clicking the blue button below: “Add Your Link”. (Subscribers: click here to get there directly).

*Today’s 3/8/12 Writing Prompt:* A heart healing moment.

*Next Thursday’s 3/15/12 Writing Prompt: * fearless.

Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real. Click here to learn more.

When It Feels Like God Is Late: Destiny & Delays

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 08:05:26 +0000

When I was new mommy of two, grocery shopping with a three-year-old toddler and a baby got very tricky.

With a twenty-pound CJ strapped in a baby carrier on me, I’d push a fidgety TJ in cart, navigating the aisles and a banana-and-milk check list.

It was always a race to the finish. So, when your child asks to buy some cupcakes, it’s important to talk him down slowly, rather than say just say no.

“Good idea! Let’s get them next time.”

This round, however, went to TJ, because his request turned out to be a selfless act.

“But, Mommy…” TJ protests. “Daddy is sick! I think blueberry muffins will make him feel better!”

Back at home, I unload the groceries, baby chews on a bib. TJ sits at the table — with a mouth full of muffin and a glass full of milk.

As I restock the fridge, shaking my head in humor, my preschool son restores my hope in the joys of parenting.

“Mommeee!” TJ calls out, after a gulp to wash down some cake. “These muffins are gooood… Why don’t we get these muffins to Daddy right now?!”

“That would be nice, wouldn’t it?” I holler back, volleying the conversation back in his court.

In a moment of genius, TJ gets inspired.

“I know!… Let’s put some muffins in the mailbox! Then, the postman can pick it up and put it in Daddy’s mailbox at work. He can eat it at work and be happy right away!”

Makes perfect sense, doesn’t it? Put a muffin in the box and have it delivered. Piece of cake.

As far as my little buddy was concerned, he had it all figured out.

After all, he didn’t know that mail doesn’t get processed in an hour. Last I checked, they haven’t invented Star Trek-like food replicators, instantly synthesizing pastries on demand.

Muffin In a Mailbox Thinking

Like my sweet boy, I can’t help but get excited that I have a direct line into God. He can do anything in an instant.

And that’s where I trip up.

I’ll come up with an awesome idea or solution about my life.

You know, God.

… That dream that’s been put on pause and waiting for you to press “play”?

… That breakthrough I’ve been quietly praying about?

… How about that “thing” I’m trusting you with?

When prayers aren’t answered and the fog isn’t lifting, I think God is delayed.

Trouble is, how can I say God is late, if I don’t have the schedule?

I’m just like TJ, wanting to put my muffin into the “magic box” and have it go where I want. When I want.

God Delivers Destiny On Schedule

I’ve got to quit trying to figure out God’s schedule and setting up my own.

Yeah, God’s schedule.

Like a horse being trained to turn circles, God brings me back to the same starting point for faith:

God knows where He needs to get me, and He will get me there.

Faith is designed to keep us holding onto God. As such, there are some things that we just don’t know.

When our lives don’t appear to match up with our destiny, God tells us to relax into His sovereignty.

He’s got everything under His control. His purpose will prevail.

Right on time.

Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

Trusting God when the timing in life feels off is hard. But, our journey is not invisible to God. His plans for us are unchanging.

When we trust Him, anything and everything we do holds value in God’s eyes. To God, our faith is what He treasures. It’s what Jesus saw in the widow who dropped her all in the offering box at the temple. And it’s faith He also sees in our hearts, when we draw near to Him offering Him our questions and our surrender — especially when timing of circumstances or events don’t match what we expect. He sees. He sees.

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How is God calling you to trust Him with His timing?

Pull up a chair. Makes me smile having you share.Click to share a comment.

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* NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — LINK UP IN THE FAITH JAM *

Faith Barista Jam Thursdays – Every Thursday, I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post and link up.

Place the Faith Jam Badge in your post. It’s a welcome sign for our community. Grab the HTML Code. Thanks!

HTML Code For the Faith Jam Faith Fresh Badge

<a href="http://www.faithbarista.com/join-faith-barista-jam-thursdays/" target="blank"></a>

Share your post by clicking the blue button below: “Add Your Link”. (Subscribers: click here to get there directly).

*Next Thursday’s 3/1/12 Writing Prompt: * Trust. (“trust” has become our #1 most selected One Word for the year.)

*Next Thursday’s 3/8/12 Writing Prompt:* A heart healing moment.

Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real. Click here to learn more.

It’s a jam session. Say hi & drop a comment and make a faith friend when you visit the community faith blends!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
** Don’t miss! ** If you are new to Faith Barista, I’d like welcome you here.Click to subscribe by email and get each post in this series served up hot and fresh directly in your mailbox.

Today’s post is refreshed from the archives.

{ Unwrapping Love } What Attracts You To Jesus?

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 08:05:00 +0000

When you are quiet and at rest, do you visualize yourself with Jesus? What is He like and what is it that attracts you to Him?

I don’t know why he appears to me this way.
But he does.

He’s usually sitting by a creek,
On a boulder, with room left for me.

He doesn’t say a word,
but His quiet isn’t silence.

His quiet is kindness.
He has no expectations.

He is happy that I am there.

I walk over to sit next to him.
Sometimes, he holds my hand.
Sometimes, he wraps his arm around me.

We listen to the water trickling by.

I don’t have to say a word.
He knows everything that has happened to me,
He knows how it’s shaped me,

He knows how to reach me.

There are so many reasons to be attracted to Jesus. Throughout time, songs have been sung, poems have been penned about the wonderful ways of Jesus. But when it comes down to it, knowing Jesus is really a love story.

How did yours begin and how is continuing to be written?

One Quality

No matter how much time has passed, it seems there is one quality about Jesus that continues to draw me close to him.

It’s not because He is powerful.

It’s not because He is holy.

All of this is true.

But for me, I’ve come to trust him because of this…

Jesus is acquainted with grief. (Isaiah 53:3)

The Hebrew word for acquainted is “yada” meaning –

to know by experience

to see and perceive

Jesus could have chosen to distinguish himself by charm, intellect, or riches.

But, He chose an attribute that everybody else would rather forget, hide and avoid.

He chose to know through personal experience the things that cause us to feel small, overlooked and alone. He felt sadness, loss, loneliness, and disappointment.

That is why I’m attracted to Jesus.

Familiar

He isn’t afraid of weakness. He is drawn with tenderness to me and loves me right through it.

There are no problems so enduring that it would tire him of me.

There is no difficulty that would cause him to be impatient with me.

Nothing that can drive him away.

He is familiar with all my ways. It’s in that intimacy that he loves me and he died for me.

“He will not quarrel or cry out;
no one will hear his voice in the streets.
A bruised reed he will not break,
and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.” (Isaiah 42:3)

His grief makes him gentle, kind, and compassionate. He isn’t loud or out for attention. He is attentive.

Joy

A person understands grief is also someone who treasures joy.

Because Jesus is familiar with grief, I beam when he tells me, “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10).

It thrills my heart to hear him say this because it means seeds of joy are being planted alongside the ones sown in tears.

Jesus knows the hunger for joy that sorrow leaves in its wake.

Jesus is Living Water that –

refreshes my heart to laugh with a friend who visits for a bit,

sigh with contentment over a lazy day,

squeal like a child as I point out a violet sunset to my children.

Jesus is here for us, so that we can find companionship with each other on this journey together.

His acquaintance with grief says our world can always be new again, friends.

He’s given us His heart, pouring it broken, in exchange for you and me.

~~~~~

How do you imagine being with Jesus?

What is one quality that attracts you to Jesus today?

Pull up a chair. I’d love hearing from you.Click to share a comment.

~~~~~

* NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — LINK UP IN THE FAITH JAM *

Faith Barista Jam Thursdays – Every Thursday, I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post and link up.

Place the Faith Jam Badge in your post. It’s a welcome sign for our community. Grab the HTML Code. Thanks!

HTML Code For February’s Faith Jam Faith Fresh Badge

<a href="http://www.faithbarista.com/join-faith-barista-jam-thursdays/" target="blank"></a>

Share your post by clicking the blue button below: “Add Your Link”. (Subscribers: click here to get there directly).

*Next Thursday’s 2/23/12 Writing Prompt: * What is one thing that attracts you to Jesus?

*Next Thursday’s 3/1/12 Writing Prompt:* Trust. (“trust” has become our #1 most selected One Word for the year.)

Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real. Click here to learn more.

Photo Courtesy of Findstuff22 via Photobucket.

{ Unwrapping Love } Why Joy is Soul Baring

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 08:05:47 +0000

Here in California, there is an early sign of spring’s arrival.

I look out the kitchen window. Where the branches once stood bare, cherry blossoms have bloomed in clusters.

But the rain fell during the night and they swept many of those petals to lie wet on the ground.

I love how they carpet the driveway with pale pink dots.

I’m reminded that God displays beauty through movement. He splurges his creativity on things that are delicate. Even if they last only for a moment.

Soul Baring

I thought I was most vulnerable during times of hurt and loss. But, I’m learning that choosing joy is just as soul baring.

Joy is vulnerable because it is organic, always pointing us to movement, to risk.

Joy moves us out of isolation. It hopes and dares. Joy is willing to take a journey where God is the one steering the who, what, when and how. We may not be sure of ourselves, but that is a beautiful sign we are entering where we are most exposed. “Take me as I am. I’m trusting all of myself to you.”

Happiness, on the other hand, is something we can control. But, we become vulnerable to what others say about us: our past, our critics, and even ourselves.

Are we good enough?

Did we do enough?

Can I continue being and doing enough?

Happiness in this world is earned.

So, I feel awkward, taking joy in as if I earned it, knowing I haven’t. I smile anyways. Because deep inside, I am a little girl adopted by a Father who has waited a lifetime to shower me with grace.

With God, joy is total grace. He says to me –

You are enough.

You don’t need to do or be anything more.

You are loved, just as you are.

I’ll keep whispering this to you over and over again,

Like gentle spring rain on life-giving soil.

Tell Me Again

Sometimes, when I can’t fall asleep, I don’t even know why.

In those moments of feeling anxious about sleep slipping away, I whisper in the dark to Jesus.

Tell me again, Jesus.

Tell me there’s nothing to worry about.

Tell me that you love me.

And everything will be alright.

It’s one of the most beautiful gifts Jesus offers to us: vulnerability.

I’m learning our most vulnerable moments — when we’re holding ourselves back — is soil rich for intimacy with God. It’s where we are raw and our hearts are organic. Soft.

Don’t be afraid. Even if your steps feel uncertain.

It’s really the perfect indicator that joy is right behind that door of vulnerability.

Will I open myself to joy?

Will I choose to say no to somethings and say yes to others?

Will I dare to keep taking in joy, even if you don’t know the way ahead — and savor it like watching the wind cast a shower of blossoms to the ground?

Tell me again that you love me, Jesus.

I’ll dare to dream again.

Even if it’s for a moment.

I know you’ll be with me there. Amen.

“Behold, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands; Your walls are continually before Me.” Isaiah 49:16

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How is God calling you to be more vulnerable with Him?

Pull up a chair. Hearing your voice is faith in real-life poetry. Click to share a comment.

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PSST… You’re Already Amazing

My friend Holly Gerth has an incredible book “You’re Already Amazing: Embracing Who You Are, Becoming All God Created You To Be” that will break open the doors of your heart. I got a chance to read it, and I can’t wait to share it with you. It will be out in March, but Barnes & Nobles has it on pre-sale HALF OFF today on February 16 ONLY $6.99. Just click here!

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* NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — LINK UP IN THE FAITH JAM *

Faith Barista Jam Thursdays – Every Thursday, I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post and link up.

Place the Faith Jam Badge in your post. It’s a welcome sign for our community. Grab the HTML Code. Thanks!

HTML Code For February’s Faith Jam Faith Fresh Badge

<a href="http://www.faithbarista.com/join-faith-barista-jam-thursdays/" target="blank"></a>

Share your post by clicking the blue button below: “Add Your Link”. (Subscribers: click here to get there directly).

*Next Thursday’s 2/9/12 Writing Prompt: * Vulnerable Love?

*This Thursday’s 2/16/12 Topict: * What is one thing that attracts you to Jesus?

Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real.

Photo Courtesy of Findstuff22 via Photobucket.

{ Unwrapping Love } God’s Love Notes: One Word is All It Takes

Bonnie Gray — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 08:05:53 +0000

Do you remember a first love letter?

I remember mine.

I still remember the first time he emailed me.

He. emailed. me.

My throat gasped in disbelief as my head swam off to sea. My heart was standing in front of cheering thousands, I was so nervously euphoric. I was the victor, having captured someone’s heart.

Were these words written about me?

I’d read and re-read. If the day got tedious, you would’ve never guessed it. I could recall how a sentence wrapped around, where a comma was placed, with photographic memory like never before.

All the Dear Jane letters that littered my past disappeared in that moment.

It takes take many words to bring joy in the language of love.

There are so many words that we consume in a day. The ones we speak as parents, co-worker, managers and workers. We wade through emails, entertainment news, tweets, Facebook messages, not to mention newsletters, bills and spam.

The year’s just started and our world floods us with sales, specials, diets, programs and resolutions.

But, just one word from God is all it takes.

To give us joy.

To give us rest.

If we really believed God wrote us love letters, we’d carry them like notes in a bobbing bottle in our desert island of stress.

I’m wanting joy this year and it’s the kind that can only be found in being loved. Without faith, it is impossible to believe what we’re craving is really what God is offering. Faith is the one choice we have for joy.

Let’s take out that shoe box and start dusting off those love letters. Read them fresh and keep our eyes open. We’ve got some of God’s love letters coming our way.

God’s Love Notes (GLN)

When your days feel weary with words that overwhelm you about your worth, look for God’s Love Notes.

Here are some I’ve tucked away I’d like to share with you now…

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…To read the rest of the story – click here to join me over at DaySpring’s (in)courage site, where today’s post is published.

Take a virtual coffee break together and share your thoughts. I’ve turned off comments here, so we can all meet up there!

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{ Unwrapping Love } Flirt With Remembrance

Bonnie Gray — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 08:05:33 +0000

Flirting with candy & crayons (his fave: black licorice, my fave: malt balls)

“Love is the greatest refreshment in life.” ~ Pablo Picaso

Three different pharmacies. In less than an hour.

Two-year-old CJ caught a case of a bad cold this week, bordering on pneumonia. I was on the hunt, trying to get some over-the-counter remedy for the little guy. Turns out they don’t sell what I was looking for anymore. But I found something else instead.

My search for medicine brought me walking through an explosion of Valentine cards, words and love-dovey products. The celebration of love is in full swing.

As I passed by the greeting card aisle, I stopped to look over the Valentine’s Day cards. The selection was thin. Most of the “Husband” cards talked about how hard the he worked and how daily life is so busy.

I decided to check out the “Love” section. These read much more romantic.

A Sign

Reading all the mushy gushy sentiments brought me back to those first dates with Hubby. Romantic with never enough time to finish our conversations. I was surprised by his attention and even more so by my attraction to him, since I seriously thought I had the gift of singleness. It’s not that I didn’t want to fall in love. But, since I was blowing out thirty candles not having found “the one”, I had to practically consider the possibility. I made up my mind to be joyfully content and live the best single life possible.

Then one Friday night, he walked in as a visitor to our 30′s singles group at church. It’s often said that mature love grows and we mustn’t rely on our feelings. But, you know what? I have always been emotionally open and bare with God. If I was gonna marry, I wanted someone who reflected this aspect of God. I wasn’t going to settle for anything less than emotionally available and affectionate.

I played it very carefully because once I gave my heart away, I couldn’t do it piece-meal.

I played it so safe, I over played it.

He thought I wanted to be just friends.

Uh-oh. It was time. I needed to give him a sign.

Guess what I did? I went to a candy store, sampled the bins and made little packets of gummy bears, malt balls, yogurt covered pretzels, chocolate raisins and other sweet treats. Then, I wrote a little note, drove over to his apartment and placed it on his doorstep.

I giggle now, remembering how I nervously waited for the phone to ring that evening.

Here I am, tired after a day of being koala wrapped by CJ, with an afternoon still left with both boys. But, something curious happened as an idea hit me.

I wanted to flirt with remembrance. I escaped into a plan to unwrap love with Hubby — for no reason, other than “I like you.”

I gave the kids one more TV show than usual, got the place tidied up, got the kids fed earlier — for an earlier bedtime.

Remember…

When Hubby came home, he had had a tough day. I was drained too. But, after Hubby and I put the kids to bed, I dashed off out, claiming I needed to do one last grocery run.

I bought a mix of candy, tip-toed into the kitchen, and quietly cut out a simple valentine — using a few squeezes of glue, a pair of scissors and a red crayon. I poured it into a container and lit a candle next to it.

“Honey,” I mentioned as casually as I could. “I left something on the kitchen counter. Would you mind grabbing it for me?”

He came back with big boyish grin.

“Remember the candy I dropped off just for you?” I smiled.

We immediately went back in a time machine, just him and I.

Before the wrinkles from sleep deprivation.

Before we had to worry about the economy.

Before we had two little boys and parenting became an everyday reality.

Before there was love, we liked.

We flirted.

As the world counts down to hearts and roses this week — bring yourself back to the place where you were just his girl.

And he was just your guy.

What you say matters to him deeply.

Eve was cut out of Adam’s rib. You have the amazing power to love that part of him that no one can reach.

Think back on how you smothered him with affection, that lets him know he is special. No matter how crazy life gets — especially when I get stressed — I love escaping to that place of being the beloved. Where both him and I are safe.

I think of ways to invite Hubby to return there with me. As wives, we can take the lead.

Do you remember how you first flirted or showered affection on your guy?

Everyone’s story is different. Our love languages are unique too.

Touch — Did you hug and snuggle, linked hands as he drove, or encircled your arms around him?

Time – Or maybe you walked your way into his heart by spending time doing stuff your special guy loves?

Acts of Service — Are you the kind of girl that likes to bake or cook your affection?

Words of Affirmation – Did you write, email, or text him sweet nothings that would make your friends cringe?

Gifts – Did you buy him little somethings that let him know you were thinking of him?

One of my favorite books on marriage was given to us by our friends Mike and Sally, a godly couple who has enjoyed over 40 years of wedded bliss: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman. He studied and followed over 600 newlywed couples since 1972 to find common ingredients in the successful marriages that avoided divorce.

You’d think things like “common interests” or “absence of conflict and arguments” topped the list. They didn’t even make the list.

“Fondness and admiration can be fragile unless you remain aware of how crucial they are to the friendship… the core of any good marriage….The simple reason is that fondness and admiration are antidotes for contempt.”

Gottman found that 94 percent of the time that couples who put a positive spin on their marriage’s history were likely to have a happy future.

So, take the time to splurge on your guy.

Go ahead, flirt with remembrance.

This Valentine’s week, give both you and your spouse the gift of remembrance.

Don’t wait until the 14th. Set the mood now.

Make it simple.

Bring him back to that place when your story as a couple first began.

My guess is that you’ll find yourself beloved there as well.

“Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man” Genesis 2:22

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Wanna venture out? Share a sign you gave when your story as a couple began?

What are your ideas to flirt with remembrance to unwrap love?

Pull up a chair. We promise not to tell. Give us some ideas…. Click to share a comment..

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