Family Minute RSS

Make Time for What’s Really Important

Fri, 25 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

There’s no such thing as not having time. When we say “I don’t have time,” what we’re really saying is that we don’t choose to make certain things a priority right now, or, there’s something else we’d rather be doing. Think about all the demands on your schedule and take a look at the things you spend the most time on. The truth is, we make time for the things we want to make time for. But that isn’t always necessarily what we should make time for. Starting today, make it a priority to set aside time for things that are ultimately important… your spouse, your kids, your faith, your health. To help you get started, here are 5 ways to maximize family time.

From Empty Nest to Love Birds

Thu, 24 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

School is coming to a close and that means some households will be child-free for the first time in 18 years. For many moms, the Empty Nest Syndrome can be really difficult emotionally. And moms who’ve invested all their time and energies into raising their children also face another challenge. When the kids fly the coop, mom suddenly turns her affection and attention back to her husband, only to find that he’s not even in the same tree anymore, so to speak. But, it’s possible to become lovebirds again. Here are 4 tips to restore your marriage.

Marital Train of Thought

Wed, 23 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

As you're listening to your wife explain a situation or problem, here are a couple of questions to ask yourself: "How does she feel as she’s telling me this?" and "Why is this important to her?" One of the biggest challenges in marital communication is not understanding the emotion and motive behind the message. So, the next time you're not quite following your wife's train of thought, instead of pushing her to get to the point, try to figure out where the train is coming from and where it's going. Try using word pictures or ask questions, like: “What makes you feel that way?” Then, you’ll understand and respond to her better, and she’ll be very pleased you stayed on the track with her. For more ideas, try these marriage conversation starters.

American Idol and Criticism

Tue, 22 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

I’m not talking about having enough talent… I’m talking about being able to handle the criticism. Those judges can be pretty harsh. One night they’re singing your praises, the next, they’re tearing you to shreds. Well, in most things our kids do, they have to be prepared for criticism. Hopefully, the person giving the critique will offer it kindly. Even if they don’t, we need to teach our children how to handle it. Criticism can hurt, but it can also motivate them to try harder. Teaching our kids how to cope with criticism is an important lesson we must teach as parents.

Dependence or Independence?

Mon, 21 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

It seems like everything we hear today links strength with independence….it’s the American way, right? Well, independence is great if you’re talking about things like freedom and finances, but not when it comes to family relationships. There’s only one independent Being in the universe and it is not you or me! We are made to be dependent. A child should depend on, and live under, the authority of his mother and father; because they have his best interests at heart. A husband and wife should be dependent on each other because the two together are stronger than one. So encourage your spouse and children to have a healthy dependence on you . . .and each other. Start by using our family fun time cards to spend time together and strengthen your relationships.

9 Steps to Prevent Child Abduction

Fri, 18 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Well, actually the concept of “stranger” can be confusing to children, so instead, teach them to recognize unsafe situations. Warn against adults who might stop to ask for directions or help in finding a lost pet. Tell your children never to go anywhere with an adult who doesn’t know the family password. Teach your children that it’s OK to run away or cause a loud scene if they feel someone might be dangerous. Talk to your kids and then role play to make sure they know what to do in an unsafe situation. For more tips, here are 9 steps to prevent child abduction.

Vision Exam

Thu, 17 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

The other day, my son tried on my reading glasses. “Wow!” he said, “I can see really good up close, but far away—it’s blurry.” That made me think . . . all children, whether they need glasses or not, are “near-sighted.” Like my son, they only see what’s up close . . . what’s happening today at school or tonight after dinner. Stuff in the distance —college, marriage, career—that’s more fuzzy and out of focus. Parents are usually more “far-sighted,” and it’s our job to help our kids see things in the distance . . . what’s in their future. Here’s more on how to help your child create a vision.

How to Extinguish an Old Flame

Wed, 16 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Well, for a flame to exist, you have to have fuel. You know those old pictures you have tucked away…the love letters you’ve saved…the texts you exchange…the seemingly harmless flirtations on Facebook. These are the fuel that—given a spark—might just become a raging inferno. So, the first step to extinguish an old flame is to get rid of the fuel source. Throw out the reminders, get rid of the pictures of romantic embraces and snuff out the old embers. Here is the second step to extinguish an old flame and protect your marriage.

Read the Lyrics

Tue, 15 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Recently, I asked my son for his iPod so I could check out the songs he was listening to. I Googled the lyrics for the songs, and most were just fine. But I did find a couple that weren’t. I sat down with him and showed him the objectionable lyrics. While reading through the words, I think we were both a bit surprised at the coarse language, degradation of women and sexual content in the lyrics. After he deleted those songs from his iPod, we talked about not supporting these so-called artists by buying that kind music, and about the importance of keeping those kinds of messages out of our hearts and minds. For ideas on similar artists your child might like, try our children’s music chart. And if you need help with movie choices, iMOM’s movie monitor has detailed reviews for thousands of movies.

One-on-One Time

Mon, 14 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

It’s great to do things as a family, but children love it when they get mom or dad all to themselves. So carve out a little time with each of your kids as often as you can. You can start by using our dad time coupons and mom time coupons. Now that summer break is almost here, try to take off one day for each child during the summer. Use the summer break to spend fun, quality time with your children. Take them on a special outing for the day. It doesn’t have to be anything big…have lunch together, toss the football in the backyard, walk around the mall. Use the time to really focus on your child. Listen to what each one has to say. Tell them how much you enjoy being with them. Praise them for the things that make them unique.

Mother's Day Gifts

Fri, 11 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Maybe you’re buying your wife some flowers or you’re taking her out for a nice lunch. Well all that is wonderful but be sure to help your children honor Mom too. If they’re really small let them color a card for her – or you buy one and let them scribble on it. If your kids are older have them use some of their allowance money to get her something of their choosing. This will help teach your children that they should show their Mother honor and love on her special day. Print off a blank copy of our top 10 reasons why I love my mother and fill it in with your kids. And don’t forget to download iMOM’s Mother’s Day gift full of free printables for mom.

Liberate Your Spouse's Body Image

Thu, 10 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Body image is how you picture yourself based on what you see in the mirror and by the reactions that you see from other people. Negative feelings about body image are mostly experienced by women, but not exclusively. If your spouse suffers from a poor self-image, here are three A’s that can help liberate your spouse’s body image. First, affirmation. Affirm them by saying things like, “My favorite part of you is [blank].” Second, attention. Make sure your attention and affections are focused on your spouse, and not anyone else. The third A is active. Do things outdoors that you both enjoy. When you do, your spouse will start to see their body image in a whole new light.

Sabbath to Refresh Your Soul

Wed, 09 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Chances are you answered, “Yes.” According to an article in the Los Angeles Times, observing a day of rest, or Sabbath, has become a lost art. Back in 1908, a psychologist said of the Sabbath, “People enjoy the freedom from all slavery of the clock, better and more leisurely meals, the hush of noise on the deserted street, the intensified charm of the sky…as well as rest, pure and simple, for body and mind.” So this week, bring back a lost art, enjoy the hush of noise, indulge in rest, and take time to remember the Sabbath.

Children and Cheating

Tue, 08 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

My kids have said to me, “Dad, everybody cheats at school!” Well, it may not be everybody, but a recent survey says three out of four high school students admitted to cheating on an exam at least once in the past year. Their reason? They say that it’s ok to cheat if you need to make a good grade…but it's not. Tell your children why cheating is wrong. First, cheating is stealing…and that’s against the law. Second, cheating shows misplaced priorities. Honesty always trumps GPA. Third, cheating begets cheating. If you cheat at school, you’ll eventually cheat in other areas of life. Help your kids beat cheating by using these 10 ways to teach your children to be honest.

How Affairs Happen

Mon, 07 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

I’ve been hearing that question more and more lately. People who’ve had affairs often say that they had some unfulfilled need that slowly began to be met by someone other than their spouse—a friend, co-worker, old flame, a neighbor. From there, it was slippery slope to a full-blown extramarital affair and a broken marriage. So what can you do? Well, be aware of danger signs and take action. The best way to prevent an affair is to stop it before it starts. I don’t have all the answers, but I’d like to share 10 ways to affair-proof your marriage. And take a minute to review these 10 marital principles for social media as well.

Patience: A Lesson Learned from My Children

Fri, 04 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

My kids have taught me a lot of things…and I can tell you, it’s a very humbling experience. One thing that they’ve shown me over and over again is my lack of patience. For example, my impatience with the grocery store cashier during check out, with the waitress at a restaurant, or my impatience driving them to school. You get the picture! I’m setting the example that impatience is okay. And it’s kind of embarrassing to admit. I’ve found that the best way to teach kids good behavior is to model it for them. When they point out my impatience or other faults, I can respond by being defensive and telling them to be quiet. Or I can listen, thank them for pointing it out to me, and ask them to keep reminding me. I’m pleased to report…I patiently did the latter.

What You Can Learn about Parenting from Call of Duty

Thu, 03 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

I was playing the simulated military game, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 with my teenage son…and I’m really bad at it. The mission is to kill the bad guys or be killed. In real life, what do you do when someone takes aim at you and starts to fire? Fire back, right? Well, that’s our instinct, but our call of duty is to receive the “friendly fire,” and not pull the verbal trigger…even though everything in us says “let it rip!” Start by modeling peacemaking skills for your children. Sometimes responding with a gentle answer like, “It makes me sad that you feel that way,” or not responding at all is our call of duty. What do you think?

The Truth about Marriage

Wed, 02 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Marriage is really hard….and takes a lot of work. Even after all that hard work, I still mess up. I mean, I want an awesome marriage, but I still DO the things I shouldn’t, and DON’T do the things I should. One day I praise her, the next I put her down. One day I’m happy with her, the next I’m angry. So, what can I do? Sure, I’ll ask for forgiveness, and I’ll work to handle it the right way next time. But guess what, I will disappoint her again. When I do, I won’t lose heart, I’ll correct myself. She’ll show me undeserved favor and we’ll persevere together…because marriage is for life. For more tips, here are my thoughts on the 7 truths about marriage. And for some fun ideas on how to serve your spouse, try these marriage coupons.

My New Book on Fatherhood

Tue, 01 May 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Dads, what will you see at the end of your journey? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. When all is said and done and you look back on the trail you’ve paved, what will you see? Will you see a path where you pursued fame and fortune to make you happy? Will your trail be littered with power and pleasure seeking? Or, will your daily steps on your fatherhood adventure be marked with love…a love where you gave selflessly and sacrificially to your kids. In my new book, All Pro Dad, being released today, I give men a clear picture of what it looks like to peer at the peak of success as a dad and how to lead our children on a path grounded on love. There are seven essentials to be a hero to your kids. And it’s an incredible adventure. Let’s go for it together. Remember, your Family First.

Who or What am I Living for?

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Who or what are you living for? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. Just as the earth revolves around the sun and keeps a constant orbit as a result of the gravitational pull of the sun, your life will revolve around what you depend on for happiness. The gravitational pull of the source of your happiness will be so strong that it will influence everything else you do, including what kind of father you’ll be. A man will live for what he thinks will make him ultimately happy. So, who or what are you living for? Who or what is your master? If you miss this, you miss everything. You’ve got to get this right to be the loving and leading dad your children need you to be. Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Moms, how do you like to be greeted? Doesn't it make you feel good and secure when someone gives you their full attention and an enthusiastic greeting? Well think about how your children feel when they see you in the morning, after school, or when you pick them up from an activity. Here are the top 10 ways not to greet your child.

What Do I Need to Share with Others?

Fri, 27 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

What is your message? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. Our message is what we have to share with others. Know your message. It is often born out of what gives us pain. We all experience pain. The question is, “What will I do with pain?” “Will it make me more focused on myself or on others?” In my new book, All Pro Dad, I share how pain can be a “relational bonding agent.” The pain you’ve experienced in losing a job, in losing a child, in divorce or alcoholism can be used to help others who have gone through the same thing. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., said, “Everyone can be great, because everyone can serve.” We need to show our kids that loving and serving others is our great and eternal duty. Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resource for Wives

If your husband does not meet the definition of a soul mate, or at least a couple of them, what can you do? Here are five ways to make your spouse your soul mate so that it becomes an environment where you both feel more connected to each other.

What Should I Model to Others?

Thu, 26 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Do you have breach in your fatherhood fuselage? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. A number of years ago I became a private pilot. During training, I learned that a critical responsibility of a pilot is to do a pre-flight inspection. That includes inspecting the integrity of the plane to ensure that there are no cracks in the wings or fuselage. Even a minor breach can spell disaster. Likewise, a model dad must ensure that he is living a life of integrity. To compromise, even in the slightest, could be devastating for his child. Dark secrets and addictions in your life can cause a dangerous breach in your fatherhood fuselage and keep you from growing as a leader. Take a minute to consider what you should model to your children. Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Moms, here are 20 Pillow Talk Questions from iMOM, our sister program just for moms, to help you jump start your relationship with your child.

How Can I Love Others?

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Have you ever seen the Washington Monument? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. Why was it built? So that you and I would remember something important. In my new book, All Pro Dad, I share how we dads need to have a method to build “memorable monuments” in our kids’ lives. These things you do with and for your child that create lasting, loving memories. For example, when my kids were growing up, I took them somewhere they wanted to go each month on their birthday date. My daughter Emily’s birthday is March 10^th, so on the 10^th of each month it was her turn to do something she wanted to do. Each time, another monument was built. Ask yourself, “How can I better love my family?” Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resources for Moms

Moms, check out these 8 Great Dates for Moms and Daughters and if you have boys, try these 8 Great Dates for Moms and Sons.

Why Do I Do What I Do?

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Why is it important for a dad to know his motives in raising his kids? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. As a leader in your home, motive is so important. If you don’t have good motives, you will make bad decisions for your children. Winston Churchill once said, “We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” As a dad, I need to constantly ask myself, “Am I living my life to give or to get?” When it comes to my kids, I need to ask “Why am I making this decision?” “Is it best for my child long-term or just a short-term fix that’s convenient for me?” “Is this activity something my child will enjoy or just something I want to do?” Know your motive for why you do what you do. Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Moms, what do you really want? iMOM's list of 10 Mommy Must-Haves is a great place to start!

What's My Purpose?

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

What should be a dad’s mind-set in raising his kids? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. The mind-set of many fathers is thinking that their job as a dad is to be just a provider and protector. But that’s not enough. An All Pro Dad needs to have a new mind-set and know his purpose. Let me illustrate. Navy SEALS are physically and mentally tough. Their job and their mission are all-important. That’s their mind-set. A dad’s got to be mentally tough too. He needs to have the mind-set that being a dad is his most important job and that his mission is all-important. What’s that mission? To love and lead his children. Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Moms, take the 30 day mom challenge! 30 ways, in 30 days, to be the best mom you can be. For each day of the month, find the corresponding number and follow the tip.

Who Am I?

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Do you know the essentials of fatherhood? I’m Mark Merrill with today’s Family Minute. In my new book, All Pro Dad, I lay out seven essential M’s every father must know to love and lead his kids well. The first M is Makeup. To know your Makeup, you have to understand two things—your identity and your gifts. First, your identity. Your identity is who you are. It’s what makes you valuable. You are valuable because of who you are, not because of what you do. Second, your gifts. Every dad needs to understand his incredible gifts. Why is it so important to understand your identity and gifts as a dad? So that you can validate those things in your kids. Remember, your Family First.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Moms, sometimes what you see as encouragement and helpful direction can look and feel very differently to your child. Here are 5 things moms do that discourage their kids.

The Fundamentals of Being a Great Dad

Thu, 19 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

In the NFL, any good coach will tell you it’s not the spectacular highlight-reel type things that make you a Super Bowl winner. It’s knowing and executing the fundamentals day in and day out. That’s how you win. That’s how you become great. In my new book, All Pro Dad, you’ll learn that just as knowing and executing the fundamentals of football are the key to a player becoming a champion, knowing and executing the fundamentals of fatherhood are the key to becoming an all pro dad. And the two most important fundamentals for a dad are love and leadership.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Moms, get back to the basics of loving, guiding and encouraging your child with the ABC’s of Good Moms.

Marriage: Giving It All You've Got

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

The male Zeus bug, a tiny water bug common along Australia’s east coast, hitches a ride on the female for up to a week, counting on the female to feed him and mate with him at will. That’s a bug’s life. It’s all take and no give. Sound familiar? Well, in the lives of humans there’s a law of diminishing returns when one side always gives and the other always takes. Marriage needs to be a 100%/100%, give-it-all-you’ve-got relationship. When both husband and wife try to meet each other’s needs, the marriage flourishes. For great resources to help dads and husbands, sign up for All Pro Dad’s Play of the Day email. And for moms and wives, sign up for iMOM’s Espresso Minute daily email.

Resurrect a Dying Marriage

Tue, 17 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

You feel like it’s flat lined. There’s no pulse—not a breath of life remains. Before you pronounce it dead on arrival, there are four steps to marriage CPR that you can use to resurrect that dying marriage. First, patience. It took time for your relationship to need resuscitation; it will take time for it to get well again. Second, determination. Choose to be committed to each other for life, no matter what, and work together with zeal to heal the marriage. Third, forgive and accept forgiveness. Fourth, pursue truth. Communicate openly and honestly.

How to Know if You're a Workaholic

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

A University of North Carolina study found that children of workaholics have the same levels of anxiety and depression as children of alcoholics. Scary, isn’t it? So how do you know if you're working too much? Here are ten signs you are a workaholic. And ask yourself, are you more excited about going to work than spending time with your family? Do you take work home with you? Do you work on weekends…and even on vacation? Does your work preoccupy your thoughts? Have your long hours at the office hurt your relationships? If you’re addicted to work, here’s some help for workaholics. You’ve got an important decision to make.

Are You Taking Your Most Important Job Seriously?

Fri, 13 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

As I share in my new book, All Pro Dad, Tony Dungy, Truett Cathy, and Michael W. Smith are committed fathers. All of them understand that being a dad is their most important job…they understand that it’s serious business and they make a huge investment of their time and energy in that business. And, all of them understand that their mission as a dad is all-important. That mission is to love their children well and lead their children well. I hope you’ll make being a dad your most important job and you’ll pursue your fatherhood mission with fierce resolve.

Bonus Resource for Moms

Do you want help with your most important job? iMOM shares tips and insight to thousands of moms through their daily email, the Espresso Minute. If you want to receive this free email, sign up here.

How to Parent by Example

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Last night, as I stood at the kitchen sink, my son tried to push me aside, without saying a word. Well, rather than just correct him, my wife and I decided to employ a little role-play. As I stood at the sink again, she played the role of my son and said, “Dad, will you please excuse me? I’d like to wash my hands.” I said, “Sure, come on in.” and then moved out of the way. You see, telling our kids how to do something may not always work, but teaching them by example can work wonders. Here are more of my thoughts on how to parent by example.

3 Things Your Children Need from You

Wed, 11 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Several years ago Money magazine performed a tax season experiment. Forty-five tax professionals participated in preparing the magazine's tax return. The result? Forty-five different bottom-lines. That’s hard to believe. Now think about all the “professionals” out there who might give you many different bottom lines on how to be a better parent. But all should agree on these three things that your kids need from you. First, tell them that you love them. Second, tell them that you’re proud of them. Third, tell them that they’re good at something.

Marriage Battle: The Same Old Fight

Tue, 10 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

During the Civil War, more than half of the skirmishes took place in Virginia and each battle was just a continuation of the previous fight. Same reasons… same territory…different days. Sometimes marriage is like that. You have the same fights over and over about the kids, the money, the romance. The list goes on and on. Want to flip the script in your marriage? Rather than continuing to take up arms, join hands and draft a resolution. You and your spouse each write down the single most important thing you wish the other would change. Then agree on making the change and discuss how you’ll make it happen. It’s amazing how a little communication can lead to a cease-fire. For more tips, here’s how some types of communication can cause further distance.

Fatherhood: The Amazing Adventure

Mon, 09 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

During my twenty-two year quest of being a dad, I’ve experienced the joy of standing on mountaintops and the pain of crawling through valleys. Fatherhood is full of fun, excitement, and adventure, but difficulty and pain in raising children may unexpectedly leap across our trail like a wild beast attacking us and our kids. In my new book, All Pro Dad, I’ll show you how to slay those beasts and stay the course, even during the darkest and most difficult hours of your child’s life. Being a dad is an amazing adventure. I’m ready to go. How about you?

5 Ideas for Effective Discipline

Fri, 06 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Sometimes we think that repeating ourselves over and over again in an angry, raised voice is the only way to get our children to obey. I’m definitely guilty of that. But here is a better way…Look your child in the eye. Say it once in a calm, firm voice, and then be silent. For example, you say, “Matthew, please brush your teeth right now.” If he doesn’t respond, then immediately discipline him without saying another word. Silence can be a powerful tool when disciplining your children. For more help, try these five ideas for effective discipline.

Stop, Look, and Listen to Your Spouse

Thu, 05 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Author Pat Morley suggests that we stop, look, and listen when our spouse wants to talk. First, stop what you’re doing. Put down your cell phone, turn off the TV. Second, look directly at your spouse when they’re talking to you. It shows you care. Third, really listen to your spouse. And men, that doesn’t mean telling her how to solve a problem. It means identifying how she’s feeling with an understanding nod. It means repeating back to her what she’s said. It also means saying things like, “I know that must be tough, what can I do to help.” Here’s more on how to be a better listener.

3 Ways to Appreciate Your Spouse

Wed, 04 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Feel like all you do is clean the house, wash the clothes, pick up after others, and provide taxi service for the kids... and no one notices? Or, maybe you feel like all you are needed for is to bring home a paycheck. A busy husband or wife can often get those feelings. So, what can you do? First, validate what your spouse is doing. Let them know that their seemingly mundane job IS very important and why. Second, if possible, give them a "day off" from their normal routine by doing it for them with one of these marriage coupons. Finally, get the kids involved. Have them write a love list for mom or a love list for dad thanking them for what they do.

Baseball is Back

Tue, 03 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

The temperature…a little warmer, the grass…a little greener. The crack of the bat is in the air. It’s that time of year again – tomorrow is Opening Day of baseball season. Guys, remember when you were a child and you played in your first Little League game? Now, you’re grown-up. But just for today, you can relive your childhood dream of hitting that grand slam…and you can do it with your children. Take your kids to a game at the ballpark; eat a hot dog and peanuts together. Or, play catch with them in the backyard. But before you head to the ballpark, take a minute to look inside the life of an umpire.

How to Reap the Seed You Sow

Mon, 02 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400

If you plant tomato seeds, you’ll get tomatoes, right? If you plant cucumber seeds, you’ll get cucumbers. You reap what you sow. In the same way, the seeds you plant in your relationships determine what you’ll get in return. Do you want your children to be patient, kind and respectful to you? Then sow seeds of patience, kindness and respect to them. Want your spouse to be understanding, loving and loyal? Then sow those same seeds yourself. Treat others the way you want to be treated.

8 Ideas for a Fun Family Road Trip

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Charles and Frank Duryea were the first to sell an automobile on March 31^st, 1896 in the town of Springfield, Massachusetts. When the first cars took to the roads, people thought they were impractical. Today, they’re in the driveways of nearly every American home. So celebrate this moment in history with your family. Take a car trip to an undiscovered local destination—together. It doesn’t take a lot of planning…just a little gas and a spirit of adventure. Turn off the radios, cell phones, mp3 players…and just talk to each other. Try a few of these 8 ideas for fun family road trip activities. At the end of the day your fuel tank may be empty, but your love tank will be full.

3 Phases of Creating Boundaries for Your Kids

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Imagine…no rules, no boundaries on the basketball court. Players can run wherever they want…and there’s never a foul. Well, you get the picture…it would be pure chaos. You can’t have a game without boundaries, and you can’t have a sane home without going through these 3 phases of creating boundaries for your kids. And those boundaries for your children must be decided by you in advance and shared with your children in advance. The older your kids get, the more input they should have on how those lines are drawn. Then, the boundaries must be consistently enforced by you, and backed up by consequences that match the offense.

Have You Walked in Your Stepchildren’s Shoes?

Wed, 28 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

To understand how to relate to your stepchild you need to put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel if your parents had split up? How would you feel if your mom or dad had re-married? And how would you feel if you now had somebody new telling you what to do? Getting a stepparent can be a big transition for a child. So when they misbehave or aren’t exactly nice to you—before you lose your temper or take things personally, walk a mile in their shoes. Here are a few tips to help you build relationships with your stepchildren.

Is Your Child the Next Mozart?

Tue, 27 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Before he was THE Mozart, Wolfgang was just a normal kid. He had good days and bad days, he played jokes on his friends and he got into trouble. What set him apart was the encouragement he got from a father who recognized his talents. But what if his dad hadn’t been listening? The world may have missed out on one of the greatest musical geniuses. Now, think of your own child whose hidden talents are just waiting to be discovered. Pay attention to their interests. Encourage them to explore their talents, and praise their abilities. Who knows? Your child might just be the next Mozart.

Undercover Spouse

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

In the hit television show, Undercover Boss, CEOs trade places with their employees. These unknowing employees train the disguised boss in a variety of hands-on jobs. Out of his element, the boss struggles to find his footing, but in the process learns what matters most to his employees—both on the job and at home. So here’s the challenge for you. Be an undercover spouse. Husbands, trade places with your wife for a day. Wives, walk a mile in your husband’s shoes. You can even get the kids in on it. I’d like to hear your thoughts.

October Baby

Fri, 23 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Hannah is a beautiful and talented 19- year-old girl who discovers that she is adopted. But the reason behind Hannah’s adoption is extraordinary. In the new movie, October Baby, opening today, Hannah takes a journey in search of her birth mother, yet she finds so much more – love, life, healing - and the truth that we all have the power to choose to forgive. In October Baby, you will see that “Every Life is Beautiful”. Here are more of my thoughts on October Baby and the Power of Life.

How to Stop Playing Favorites

Thu, 22 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

Playing favorites with your children is a dangerous game. Preferring one child over another can destroy family unity… and cause lasting emotional damage for the “unfavored” child. Maybe one daughter is prettier than her awkward sister; one son excels at academics or sports, while his brother struggles with grades, is more withdrawn, just plain ‘difficult’. It may feel natural to lavish attention on an exceptional child, but favoring one over the others can produce feelings of rejection, envy and bitterness. Look for your child’s gifts and unique qualities, and praise them for their own special talents and abilities. For ideas, start with these 10 Ways to Love Your Child.

Beethoven, Bitterness and Your Marriage

Wed, 21 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

After suffering poor health for decades, composer Ludwig van Beethoven died in 1827 from lead poisoning. It was a slow and painful death. Bitterness in marriage is like that. To find the antidote, we need to answer these three questions to quench marital bitterness. First, what causes bitterness? Usually it’s not a single event, but several things that build up over time. A wound here, an offense there…disappointment…betrayal. Second, what’s wrong with bitterness? Well, it hurts the one who carries it, causing a lot of pain. And third, how can we get rid of bitterness?

Angry Birds and Happy Marriages

Tue, 20 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

This popular game shows the life-long struggle of birds trying to get back their stolen eggs from some pigs. The birds defend each other and unite together, working toward a common goal. Taking advantage of their unique talents, the kamikaze birds catapult themselves into the pig's towers to defeat them. Marriage is kind of like that. To have a healthy relationship, you need to defend each other and stand strong together. Capitalize on your unique talents and abilities when confronting family issues. And celebrate the victories together. Here’s more on what angry birds can teach us about marriage.

How to Tackle Spring Cleaning with a New Attitude

Mon, 19 Mar 2012 00:15:00 -0400

A pen and paper. I know what you’re thinking, “Doesn’t he mean a mop and broom?” Nope, you heard right. I want you to take ten or fifteen minutes and think about the attitudes and habits you want to sweep out of your life. Is smoking dirtying your lungs? Do you need to wash away a family grudge? Or is negative thinking cluttering your mind? Whatever you need to change, write it down and commit to getting rid of it. Leave no personal dust ball unturned. And hey, once you’ve tackled that kind of spring cleaning, the usual sweeping and vacuuming will seem like a breeze. For more tips, try these three steps to dig out of clutter and our clean up cards to help you get started.