(✿◠‿◠) Fareiyka Hasan (◕‿◕✿)

selfish me

2015-10-13T22:20:00.001+08:00

i'm being selfish here,

1/4 of my heart don't want to do it.

1/4 of wants to finish what I started EXCELLENTLY

1/4 of me still can't believe what has happened

0.5/5 of me still wondering about what am I supposed to do ?

0.5/4 of me just want to be ALONE

Wondering like crazy right now. .

confused, shattered, broken pieces, brokenhearted

somebody please get me some ice cream and chocolate and cakes

I need them the most right now. .

please. .

Where were you when I need you, my dear ?

Back..........Maybe.........Maybe Not.........Maybe Yes

2015-06-28T22:24:00.001+08:00

hurm~ this is a post, a blog post by me. .

the first one in like 2, 3 years?

don't know whether i'm gonna keep update it later,,

or just leaving it as "a post a year"

couldn't be,, right?

or..... maybe it could be it. .

don't know

maybe....

hopefully,,,

yeah,, maybe,,

i don't know. .

hope to be more consistent with updating my blog that has been years without posts. .

Changed

2013-07-15T22:15:00.000+08:00

these are some 'pembakar semangat' for me. . hope it'll help me to be a better person

found out my STPM sem 2 result. .

it's s**** and decreases a lot. .

actually, didn't expect it to be better than last sem

cos, i really didn't study like others did. .

but, come to think of it

i will have to repeat it for a better result. .

and i'll make sure to study smart and hard. .

for my own sake, for my parents, and for my younger sisters and brother. .

Come on Eiyka,, get back to the real world. . now, there's no one by your side that can be like him. . -really miss you- Al-Fatihah to Faricsh,, my late tunang to-be ^_^

Ma Life

2013-07-14T16:15:00.001+08:00

When you totally don't give a shit about life,

then, you know that your life is sucks

so, what else to do ?

just watch anime &

don't forget to solat as Allah will always be by your side. .

As long as you don't forget him,,

He will never leave you ALONE. .

here is a video

this song tells everything. .

this one from IM Najdi *like him so much

Wordless Wednesday

2013-07-03T20:30:00.000+08:00

Haru from Tonari no Kaibutsu-kun

Don't Hold It

2013-07-02T02:20:00.002+08:00

To a Friend of Mine

Don't hold it to yourselves,

that's what I want from you. .

i know that you are strong but you should just share it with me. .

don't keep it as it'll burdened you more

maybe i'll not able to help you but,

i'll at least help to lessen the burden in your heart. .

you said no one care about you ??

how would you know that ?

did you ever asked someone about it ?

have you ever ask me whether I care or not ?

Try me . .

i'll help you however I could. .

If, you still think of me as your friend. .

let me lend you my shoulders and give you the warmth that you desired for long. . ^_^

FIGHTING !!

Final Fantasy XV and Kingdom Hearts 3

2013-06-15T02:02:00.002+08:00

just saw this on youtube

and it's daebak. .

gotta find a way to get these

btw, here's the trailer. .

However,, Final Fantasy 7 is still the best. .

Nobody Knows

2013-06-06T03:20:00.000+08:00

Nobody knows its empty

This smile that I wear

The real me is left in the past

Because You have left me there

Nobody knows I'm crying

They won't even see my tears

When they think that I'm laughing

I'm still wishing You were here

Nobody knows its painful

They think that I'm strong

They say that this won't kill me

But I wonder if they were wrong

Nobody knows I'm praying

That You will change my mind

They think that I had let You go

When You left me behind

Nobody really knows what's going on inside here. . What this heart has been going through all this while. . When you finally gone for ever and will never ever be back. .

Why PK Form6, Why ?

2013-04-28T14:33:00.000+08:00

Last week, settled all the PBS-related matters. .

hate to admit it but still got a lot more work to do. .

and, En. Penolong Kanan Form 6,

please jangan tambah beban kami lagi. .

janganlah tambah beban cikgu2 yang kami sayang lagi. .

Tolong lah berhati perut sekit. .

Kitorang baru je habis dengan PBS things

and, u nak kitorang hantar fail2 untuk pebel ?

what the hell is that for ?

it so that important to you ?

don't you know that we have trial this whole week ?

don't you know that out STPM is in less than 26 days ?

why are you doing this to us ?

do you hate us that much ?

Cuba lah fikir, cikgu ingat sempat ke kami nak buat folder tu ?

macam mana nak buat fail kalau dlam kelas

cikgu hanya cakap tentang PBS ?

macam mana nak score A dlam STPM sem 2,

kalau dalam kelas cikgu x mengajar ?

Cubalah fikir,, sempat ke kami nak buat fail ?

kalau PBS baru setel minggu ni ?

sempat ke nak buat fail kalau

exam esok lusa dah. .

penting sangat kah fail2 tu ?

lebih penting daripada result STPM kami kah ??

please, Mr. Penolong Kana Form 6, be a little generous to us. . please be noticed on priority. . what is our top priority ? is it the study folder, or our result in STPM ? or do you even care about our results ??

Orang kata

2013-04-09T13:42:00.000+08:00

just found this on fb,,

◆◆ Orang kata , semakin banyak kamu beriman ,

”Kamu akn diuji terus bertubi-tubi..”

◆◆ Orang kata , semakin banyak kamu berbuat baik ,

”Kau akan terus berdepan dengan masalah..”

◆◆ Ini semua benar ,

Menjadi orang yang baik bukan senang ,

Sebab itu.. ia terus ” Diuji supaya menjadi baik..”

mungkin ada hikmah disebalik segala musibah yang berlaku

kepada aku selama 4 bulan ni. .

mungkin ini semua hanyalah ujian daripada Nya

untuk aku yang sedang berusaha berubah ke arah yang lebih baik..

ke arah mendekati Nya,

untuk menjadi manusia yang beriman dan

boleh berbangga digelar muslim. .

Musibah

2013-04-09T13:03:00.003+08:00

i just have no idea what's going on around me

it is my fault ? or it is just His qada' and qadar. .

These musibah keep coming to me,,

bertalu-talu,, i don't know how to response to it anymore. .

4 months, Jan, Feb, Mac, Apr. .

4 elders died,,

Tok Cik,, Oyang Wo, Tok Che, Tok Ayah. .

why all of you got to go at times like this ?

Mom and baby brother keep going ti the hospital,,

always kena tahan there,,

why ? banyak sangat masalah dorang ?

tak boleh korang nak masuk hospital lepas setel semua masalah aku ?

lepas the shit PBS habis ?

sometimes, feel like killing myself. .

thank god, I still remember Allah,,

i still got a lot of things to do. .

I still have to deal with my PBS(s)

dah la my laptop ter format sendiri. .

just like,, what the shit is happening to me right now ?

i know that i have Allah that will always be by my side. .

I know that i would have you by my side, if

you're still alive *at least i hope so,

Rich, please, i hope you can listen to me right now. .

i want you to be by my side. .

i want you to encourage me like you used to. .

i want you help me while i'm in despair like now. .

i want you help calm me down. .

i want you to e the one that i can depend on. .

i want you to know that i will always love you. .

no matter what, when, and how

i just want you to know that even though it's already been 4 years

since then, i'm still love you, like i always do. .

i just need someone by my side to just encourage me. . someone that can help release these pain in me. . please..

just because

2013-04-06T01:24:00.001+08:00

Just because I laugh a lot

doesn't mean that my life is easy

Just because I have a smile on my face everyday

doesn't mean that something is not bothering me

I just choose to move on and

not dwell on all the negatives in my life

Every new moment

gives me the chance to renew a new

I choose to be that

If you spend to much time thinking about a thing, you will never get it done -Bruce Lee-

New Born Baby Brother ^_^

2013-04-01T12:37:00.000+08:00

Isn't he cute,,
just like her kak long,, huhu,,

planned to name him Izz Ameer Rayyan..

of course after discussed with my beloved sisters

and my mom, so daddy, u just have to say yes,, :p

borned in 29th March 2013,, *same month as me, yeay

born tak berat sangat, in fact, the lightest among us with 2.82kg

at 6.55 pm,, almost Maghrib at that time,, same with my 3rd sister,,

He's gonna be spoiled a lot by his 4 sisters and

his parents of course, as he is the only son in our family, *for now :p

it's been 4 days since he was born but still, tak boleh balik lagi,

mom got high blood pressure, he got kuning,, poor my little brother,

but, jangka they gonna come home today,, *i wish so,

semoga my baby brother and mom selamat and boleh balik as soon as possible,, aamiin~

buang masa :p

2013-03-25T22:27:00.002+08:00

Homework

2013-03-24T16:46:00.003+08:00

So much homework to do

so much PBS need to be settled within this week

it cannot be called as holiday when

homework is given more than the school days. .

FIBRE

selamat sampai

2013-03-20T19:26:00.001+08:00

selamat sampai di kota bharu pkol 11 semalam

selepas perjalanan panjang selama 10 jam,,

bapak lama smpai cram bon*** kami berenam,, maybe bertujuh,, :p

then,, tadi called pn sham asking about

my nuisance PBS things and she said,,

"hari selasa dtang, hantar PBS memo and sambung buat minit mesyarat"

OMDatuk,,

dapat info pulak dari Incik Mustaffa,

tajuk minit mesyuarat ialah,, Kejohanan Bowling Datin Hajjah Khairiah

memang tak lah kan,,

mane lah kitorang nak cekau isi,,

btw,, abaout my grandpa,,

I last saw him last raya,,

he was okay but with a little batuk2,,

tapi, in a healthy condition. .

Now,, if u see him,, u can only see just bone and skin,,

he didn't eat anything for this 2 months,,
just drinking water,, for a few glasses..

pity him,,

Heading to kampung

2013-03-19T12:14:00.002+08:00

just received a shocking news that my grandad is about

to 'nazak' as my grandma called me last night. .

she said that he wasn't able to eat anything since last month. .

we're worried sick of him,,

we knew that he was admitted to the hospital last week for having TB,,

think that we might have to head to my kampung this evening,,

which means, gotta skip the school again,,

and this time, for 2, 3 days. .

actually, sayang nak tinggalkan sekolah at time like this,,

Fyi,, STPM result's gonna come out this Thursday

and I really hope that I'll get a good grade and pointer

hope that this incident that happen to my grandpa

didn't effect my coming result. .

just gonna doa so that my grandpa will be okay

and nothing bad would happen to him. .

Gomawo-yo chingu(s)

2013-03-18T22:10:00.002+08:00

just wanna say Thank You to my chingus for this gift. .

really appreciate it,, gonna use it for goods,,

semoga dengan 'nota hati' ni, aq dpat lebih byak inspiration and all that,, thanks to you girls,, ^_^

aren't they sweet ?? haha ^_^

Happy Birthday Mok Cik

2013-03-18T14:44:00.001+08:00

ni la mk cik dengki aku. .

Happy 19th Birthday to my sis,,

Nur Ili Jannah,,

Wish you the best of luck and

wish for us to get the best for our STPM. .

Min Ho, Kawaii

2013-03-16T00:03:00.002+08:00

ahh~ just since when did he became so kawaii ?
i'm sorry Eyza,, this time, Min Ho is mine. .

could not tolerate with you for this precious pic. .

Skipping School

2013-03-14T11:39:00.001+08:00

Didn't go to school today,,

got to teman my dad to fill some form about cukai

or something,,

Iena,, bagitau papa zola,,
i'm sorry could not go to school today,,

tell him that i'll do my presentation tomorrow,,

Wordless Wednesday

2013-03-13T17:41:00.000+08:00

bugs,, one of my interest,,

but not all kind of species,,

just certain that really captured my interest on them..

these are/were some of those bugs that i like,, :p

my least favorite vege. .

Cry For You

2013-03-12T00:30:00.000+08:00

I am sitting on the porch

Wind blowing through my hair

The ducks are frolicking in the pond

But I just can't seem to care

Life goes on around me

I don't participate

I go through all the motions

But what I really do is wait

I dream about the day

That you'll come home to me

Nothing else is important

Why can't people see ?

I don't want to go out

I don't want to have fun

I don't want to do a thing

Until all is said and done

They took you in the October

Now July is almost finished

August will be here very soon

And then year will have diminished

You have no idea how much I cry

I never let you know

It's so hard out there without you

But I'm not allowed to let it show

I must pretend all is fine

Everyone thinks all is okay

But what I never ever tell them

Is that I cry for you everyday. .

Semoga kau berbahagia di samping sang pencipta ^_^

I Won't Let You Go

2013-03-11T17:00:00.000+08:00

Cover my eyes,

Cover my ears,

Tell me these words are a lie.

I won't let you fly,

I won't say Goodbye,

I won't let you go.

I refuse to let you go,

I won't lose you,

I refuse to lose you.

I'm afraid if I let you go that you won't come back,

I know that strength is the ability that I lack,

I already had to watch them lower you below.

Please don't make the pain last forever,

When I ask if you will love me,

I wonder if you will say NEVER.....

MUET test

2013-03-09T01:16:00.000+08:00

Aigoo~
tomorrow got MUET exam for reading, writing & listening. .

I really really hope that it'll go well and smoothly, like planned. . of course. .

it's really hard to score at least band 3 *if we think about it that way

and it's easy for us to score more than band 3 IF that's what we think..

so,, all we have to do is

to keep up the positive thinking and keep hoping for the best. .

as long as we take care of relationship with God ( Allah ) and teachers

InsyaAllah~ it'll go well and we might not feel the nervousness,, *crossfingers :p

I'm so scared that I couldn't even fall asleep even at this very hour,,

(1 o'clock in the morning )

Arrgghh~ gettin' frustrated all of sudden

and thinking how the h*** am I going to go through tomorrow..

Ya Allah,, please help us, the 2013 MUET candidates to go through tomorrow as smooth as possible,, please allow us to prove our true potential of getting the best for MUET test. We're not hoping for band 5 or 6,, it's enough if YOU help us to get rid of our nervousness. .

To all MUET candidates that gonna take the MUET test tomorrow,, I wish you a very best of luck or maybe luck isn't something we need but, to be feeling comfortable and easily understand what the question wants. . BEST WISHES everybody,, ^_^